http://www.robot-japan.com/Gallery/Takara/Transformers/RobotMasters/Convoy/RM-01-Convoy-Optimus.jpgUh, Breaker One-Nine, this here's the Rubber Duck
You got a copy on me Pig-Pen? C'mon
Uh, yeah 10-4 Pig Pen, fer sure, fer sure
By golly it's clean clear to Flag-Town, C'mon
Uh, yeah, that's a big 10-4 Pig-Pen,
Yeah, we definitely got us the front door good buddy,
Mercy sakes alive, looks like we got us a convoy
Was the dark of the moon, on the sixth of June
In a Kenworth, pullin' logs
Cabover Pete with a reefer on
And a Jimmy haulin' hogs
We 'as headin' fer bear on I-One-Oh
'Bout a mile outta Shaky-Town
I sez Pig-Pen, this here's the Rubber Duck
An' I'm about to put the hammer on down
Cause we gotta little ol' convoy, rockin' through the night
Yeah we gotta little ol' convoy, ain't she a beautiful sight?
Come on an' join our convoy, ain't nothin' gonna git in our way
We're gonna roll this truckin' convoy, cross the USA
Convoy... Convoy...
Uh, breaker Pig-Pen, this here's The Duck
Uh, you wanna back off them hogs
10-4, 'bout five mile or so, 10-roger
Them hogs is gittin' in-tense up here
By the time we got into Tulsa-Town
We had eighty-five trucks in all
But they's a road block up on the clover leaf
An' them bears 'as wall to wall
Yeah them smokies 'as thick as bugs on a bumper
They even had a bear-in-the-air
I sez callin' all trucks, this here's The Duck
We about to go a huntin' bear
Cause we gotta great big convoy, rockin' through the night
Yeah we gotta great big convoy, ain't she a beautiful sight?
Come on an' join our convoy, ain't nothin' gonna git in our way
We're gonna roll this truckin' convoy, cross the USA
Convoy... Convoy...
Uh, you wanna give me a 10-9 on that Pig-Pen?
Uh, negatory Pig-Pen, yer still too close
Yeah, them hogs is startin' close up my sinuses
Mercy sakes, you better back off another ten
Well we rolled up interstate fourty-four
Like a rocket sled on rails
We tore up all a our swindle sheets
An' left 'em settin' on the scales
By the time we hit that Chi-Town
Them bears was a gittin' smart
They'd brought up some reinforcements
From the Illinois National Guard
There 'as armored cars, and tanks, and Jeeps
An' rigs of every size
Yeah them chicken coops 'as full a bears
An' choppers filled the skies
Well we shot the line, an' we went for broke
With a thousand screamin' trucks
And eleven long-haired friends of Jesus
In a chartreusse microbus
Hey Sod Buster, listen
You wanna put that microbus in behind the suicide jockey?
Yeah, he's haulin dynamite
He needs all the help he can git
Well we laid a strip fer the Jersey Shore
An' prepared to cross the line
I could see the bridge 'as lined with bears
But I didn't have a doggone dime
I sez Pig-Pen, this here's the Rubber Duck
We just ain't a gonna pay no toll
So we crashed the gate doin' ninety-eight
I sez, let them truckers roll, 10-4
Cause we gotta mighty convoy, rockin' through the night
Yeah we gotta mighty convoy, ain't she a beautiful sight?
Come on an' join our convoy, ain't nothin' gonna git in our way
We're gonna roll this truckin' convoy, cross the USA
Convoy... Convoy...
Uh, 10-4 Pig-Pen, what's yer 20?
Omaha?!
Well they oughta know what to do with them hogs out there fer sure
Well mercy sakes alive good buddy
We gonna back on outta here
So keep the bugs off yer glass
An' the bears off yer... tail
We gonna catch ya on the flip-flop
This here's the Rubber Duck on the side
We gone
Bye, Bye...
― JW (ex machina), Monday, 15 May 2006 19:35 (nineteen years ago)
It was a foggy day on the sixth of May
In a Scammell haulin' bricks
It was just crackin' dawn and I started to yawn
Cos I couldn't find any nice chicks.
I'd tried Newport Pagnell, Toddington,
And even Watford Gap,
But after so many eggs and chips, sausage and beans
What I really needed was a nap.
It's a lonely life, truck driving
But it's better than a bike
Cos when you're up in the cab, you're the king of the road
And it's dead romantic, like.
And then I remembered my two-way radio,
So I started feelin' better,
And I thought "I'll start a convoy"
"You know, just like that American feller."
[Chorus]
Thus began the saga
On the M1 Motorway
Of the biggest bloomin' convoy
Outside the USA.
Why not join our line-up?
It's completely free.
All you need is transport
And a current MOT.
Convoy!
[On the CB]
Hello, this is Super Scouse callin'. Anyone out there, come on?
Hello, hello, this is Plastic Chicken, go off?
That's "come on" - what's your load, Plastic Chicken?
Er, well it would have been quick-drying cement, but the rain got in - do you know anyone who wants to buy a three-ton brick?
So there we were, the two of us,
At the start of something big.
There was Plastic Chicken with his brick on wheels,
And me in my big rig.
With every junction that we passed
Others would tag on
There was even a London Transport bus
"Hey, that's a nice wagon - fares please..."
It certainly was an impressive sight,
To see us on the road
There was vehicles of every shape and size
It certainly had growed.
Suddenly there was this commotion,
There was a circus, and a fair.
There was an animal acrobatic act
"Ooh look - a bear in the air!"
[Chorus]
You're listening to the saga,
On the M1 Motorway.
Of the biggest blooming convoy,
Outside the USA.
We're half-way through our story,
But please don't go away.
They're on Spaghetti Junction
"We could be here all day..."
Convoy!
[On the CB] Hello, Plastic Chicken to Super Scouse, gerroff, I mean come in, er, come on - oh, do I have to say this every time?
Yeah - have you seen any fuzzboxes? - that's slang for police cars.
Er, Jackanory, Super Scouse - that's slang for No!
That's Negatory, you berk...
Ooh I say, is this a private convoy or can anyone join in?
What's your wheels, our kid?
Would you believe, a camper...?
Spaghetti Junction was coming up
So we were bound to lose a few.
And sure enough, the fork-lift truck,
Disappeared heading up towards Crewe.
The combine harvester shred a wheel,
And the driver lost control.
And a mobile DJ crashed his van,
So we ain't gonna play no Soul, 10 - 4.
[Chorus]
So we end our story,
On the M1 Motorway.
Of the biggest blooming convoy,
Outside the USA.
This record is good value,
As you can plainly see.
It's labelled as a tax disc
Though it's [words indistinct]
Convoy!
[On the CB]
Er, Plastic Chicken to Super Scouse, there's a big black limo coming up behind...
Er, what about it?
Well it's got a flag on the front and a funny number plate - "HRH 1"
Mercy sakes, good buddy, you'd better give it the front door and wave her on, like...
Will do, Super Scouse, I'm waving her on - ooh look, she's waving back, isn't that nice...
Plastic Chicken, do you want to stick it in behind that suicide jockey?
What's a suicide jockey?
As it happens, How's about...
Er, Plastic Chicken, don't you think you'd better change gear for this hill?
What's wrong with the gear I've got on, doesn't it look right?
Change gear, ram your foot on the floor and change the gear, what you talking about, you don't know how to drive a truck do you, you've no idea how to drive a truck, you're mad... (continue to fade)
― Action Tim Vision (noodle vague), Tuesday, 16 May 2006 12:45 (nineteen years ago)
four years pass...