overheard in new york

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[ IAN ON OVERHEARD IN NEW YORK PLZ ]

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Black dude to white chick outside bar on LES: "its really rare, you can't get it on limewire!!!!"

― JW (ex machina), Thursday, 18 May 2006 17:32 (nineteen years ago)

http://www.overheardinnewyork.com/archives/004775.html

― electro-acoustic lycanthrope (orion), Thursday, 18 May 2006 18:05 (nineteen years ago)

hahaha awesome.

― hstencil (hstencil), Thursday, 18 May 2006 18:08 (nineteen years ago)

IAN, PLZ TO CHANGE MYSPACE NAME TO: OVERHEARD IN NY'S "STORE GUY"

― JW (ex machina), Thursday, 18 May 2006 20:39 (nineteen years ago)

NO THAT IS GAY.

― electro-acoustic lycanthrope (orion), Thursday, 18 May 2006 20:43 (nineteen years ago)

WAIT 4 REAL?

― Allyzay Rofflesbot (allyzay), Thursday, 18 May 2006 20:43 (nineteen years ago)

WE'RE USUALLY FUNNIER

― electro-acoustic lycanthrope (orion), Thursday, 18 May 2006 20:44 (nineteen years ago)

How come Overheard in NY always mentions when a "black dude" is involved, even if it's not relevant to the story?

― Abbadavid Berman (Hurting), Thursday, 18 May 2006 20:47 (nineteen years ago)

the joke is that it's ALWAYS relevant to the story.

― electro-acoustic lycanthrope (orion), Thursday, 18 May 2006 20:48 (nineteen years ago)

it seems like a perfectly valid question to me

― Allyzay Rofflesbot (allyzay), Thursday, 18 May 2006 20:48 (nineteen years ago)

the alice cooper one, not the black dude one.

― Allyzay Rofflesbot (allyzay), Thursday, 18 May 2006 20:49 (nineteen years ago)

What was the answer to the question?

ALSO: 90% of overheard in nyc = hating on dumb girls on cell phones = nyc's version of logged out / hair dye advice googlers!

― JW (ex machina), Thursday, 18 May 2006 20:50 (nineteen years ago)

i don't remember if there was a definitive answer to the question. maybe alice from the brady bunch?

― electro-acoustic lycanthrope (orion), Thursday, 18 May 2006 20:52 (nineteen years ago)

I think that's what you told me.

ALICE DONUT
ALICE COLTRANE

― JW (ex machina), Thursday, 18 May 2006 20:55 (nineteen years ago)

ALICE MY EX WHO LURKS

― hstencil (hstencil), Thursday, 18 May 2006 21:10 (nineteen years ago)

HA! I LIKE ALICE! HI ALICE!!!!!

― electro-acoustic lycanthrope (orion), Thursday, 18 May 2006 21:11 (nineteen years ago)

she said she was gonna start posting but still hasn't yet.

― hstencil (hstencil), Thursday, 18 May 2006 21:12 (nineteen years ago)

all ex-es lurk

― cutty (mcutt), Thursday, 18 May 2006 21:34 (nineteen years ago)

maybe.

― hstencil (hstencil), Thursday, 18 May 2006 21:35 (nineteen years ago)

OH DELETE TJAT

― SQUARECOATS (plsmith), Thursday, 18 May 2006 22:01 (nineteen years ago)

let's just say things will get back

― JW (ex machina), Thursday, 18 May 2006 22:10 (nineteen years ago)

"its really rare, you can't get it on limewire!!!!"

LOL!

― Unlimited Toothpicker (eman), Thursday, 18 May 2006 22:44 (nineteen years ago)

I overheard something once.

http://www.overheardinnewyork.com/archives/004686.html

― Whiney G. Weingarten (whineyg), Thursday, 18 May 2006 23:16 (nineteen years ago)

eleven months pass...

This one is great:

Conductor: Ladies and gentlemen, due to an earlier incident, all Sixth Avenue line trains are running over the Eighth Avenue line. Please be patient.
Confused tourist lady: What does that even mean? I don't understand.
Suit: It means that if you want to take any of the trains on the orange line you transfer at the next station like normal, but instead of going downstairs you just wait on that platform for the train you want.
Middle-aged woman across aisle: They're not orange line trains. It's the B, the D, the F and the V. Real New Yorkers don't call it the orange line.
Suit: Hey, lady, fuck you. There, is that New York enough for ya?

--E train approaching W 4th St

― Hurting 2, Sunday, 22 April 2007 22:22 (eighteen years ago)

I always hate when people use the colors. Much better is my friend who'd just move here years ago and said, "take the ace train".

― dan selzer, Sunday, 22 April 2007 23:19 (eighteen years ago)

I find it useful in some situations. If all the trains on a line stop at the same place, I say the color. Otherwise I say the letter. Either way the lady was being a douche and the response was awesome.

― Hurting 2, Sunday, 22 April 2007 23:32 (eighteen years ago)

Fuck people who say "real New Yorkers," in any case.

― Hurting 2, Sunday, 22 April 2007 23:33 (eighteen years ago)

sometimes "real new yorker" is code for "doesn't live in williamsburg"

― JW, Monday, 23 April 2007 00:11 (eighteen years ago)

sometimes "real new yorker" is code for "doesn't live in jersey city"

― sanskrit, Monday, 23 April 2007 01:38 (eighteen years ago)

zing! ow!

― Hurting 2, Monday, 23 April 2007 01:42 (eighteen years ago)

ow ow ow!!!

― JW, Monday, 23 April 2007 02:13 (eighteen years ago)

sometimes "real new yorker" is code for "didn't 'move to new york' omglolwtf after college." anyway, mrs. real new yorker here may have been semi-validly standing up against the touristification/anyothercityfication of nyc (and no one who lives here should ever refer to a subway line by color), but it was hardly real new yorker of her to butt in on the subway, so i'd say she got semi-deservedly pwned by suit.

― gabbneb, Monday, 23 April 2007 05:57 (eighteen years ago)

― BLASTOCYST, Monday, 23 April 2007 06:14 (eighteen years ago)

people who never lived outside of manhattan below 23rd street their whole lives - c/d

― JW, Monday, 23 April 2007 06:20 (eighteen years ago)

interested in scat? - w4m - 40

Reply to: pers-316926✧✧✧@craigsl✧✧✧.o✧✧
Date: 2007-04-23, 12:09AM EDT

Hi sports fans!
Looking for a man who is into scat, and not just human scat. I have been collecting various dung from around the Hudson Valley for the last six months. I work my days at IBM writing code and my nights beating dick with my 14th century mongolian caribou whip.

Back to what I was saying, i'm into scat. I like to see it around the face and eyelids. With horce feces I like to see it comming out of the mouth. I was a Anthropology undergrad during my schooling back in Alaska so I like to make archival footage of these adventures of the infinite mind. Which is also one of my favorite programs on NPR.

Any man interested should not hesitate to let me pack pig dung inside of his anus and then put a candle in it. This candle would be lit for 10 seconds and then splashed out with 1930's era spanish absinthe.

Must have transporation. Must like 10+ hours of Iron Maiden and not have an objection to hairy woman. I'm very earthy, my mother always told me I smelled like a pile of dirty clothes that had been soaked in panther urine.

Please send self adressed envelope of all of the video games you beat in the last 10 years.

And lastly the main requirement is that you be in a World of Warcraft guild. If you are not, I simply feel like we will not be able to connect with enough spiritual depth, that is after I smear a hot turd all over your face.

Thank you

Janice

p.s. will send you my adress after you email me you big bad hog

thank you again

Sincerly,

Janice

― JW, Monday, 23 April 2007 06:23 (eighteen years ago)

u did not overhear that.

― Whiney G. Weingarten, Monday, 23 April 2007 08:03 (eighteen years ago)

subway conductor announcement, after I'd lived here 6 months or so:

(CRACKLE CRACKLE)TCH THE CLOSING DOORS STEP LIVELY THIS IS THE *UPTOWN* *BOOGIE DOWN* *D TRAIN*

I was like oh man I'm gonna love this place

― m coleman, Monday, 23 April 2007 10:29 (eighteen years ago)

that real new yorker stuff is such bullshit tho...years ago I had a job interview at the daily newz which I thought was going well until the editor just paused all of a sudden and fixed me w/this withering gaze.

"so: how long have you lived in new york?"

"uh, almost nine years now..."

one of those moments where you just KNOW you blew it. what was I gonna do, fake an accent? "actually I'm from LORNE GUYLAND"

― m coleman, Monday, 23 April 2007 10:35 (eighteen years ago)

anyway after 9/11 WERE ALL NEWYORKERS amirite

― m coleman, Monday, 23 April 2007 10:40 (eighteen years ago)

I've lived in Australia my entire life and never been near new york but I just feel like a real new yorker

― badg, Monday, 23 April 2007 11:26 (eighteen years ago)

real mew yorkers = terrified of bushwick

― JW, Monday, 23 April 2007 12:00 (eighteen years ago)

(CRACKLE CRACKLE)TCH THE CLOSING DOORS STEP LIVELY THIS IS THE *UPTOWN* *BOOGIE DOWN* *D TRAIN*

my favorite is on the way home from work when the conductors get very exasperated "THIS IS ONLY A V TRAIN. IT IS NOT AN F TRAIN. THERE WILL BE AN F TRAIN ARRIVING SHORTLY. AGAIN THIS IS A V TRAIN. PLEASE STAND CLEAR OF THE CLOSING DOORS!!!"

― tehresa, Monday, 23 April 2007 12:54 (eighteen years ago)

I miss taking the F train in the morning with the Irish conductor. "Stan clare o'thuh closing doers, please!"

― Laurel, Monday, 23 April 2007 13:42 (eighteen years ago)

Were Irish accents common like 20 years ago here?

― Catsupppppppppppppp dude ‫茄蕃‪, Monday, 23 April 2007 13:49 (eighteen years ago)

...

― sanskrit, Monday, 23 April 2007 14:23 (eighteen years ago)

LOL what is the problem with referring to COLORED SUBWAY LINES by their COLOR? If I want to go from W 4th Street to 34th I can take the A, C or E. THEY'RE ALL BLUE. If I were telling my dad how to get to Penn Station I would say get on a blue train. Get a grip you Yorkomaniacs.

there does happen to be a map in which the lines appear in colors to differentiate them from each other so you know, like, which one goes where out of union square, but the lines are denoted by their numbers/letters, not their colors. anyway, "real new yorkers" would tell you take the bmt, not this silly "N/R" business.

― gabbneb, Monday, 23 April 2007 14:42 (eighteen years ago)

Isn't the JMZ BMT also?

― Catsupppppppppppppp dude ‫茄蕃‪, Monday, 23 April 2007 14:54 (eighteen years ago)

Bottom line is utility. Saying the color is confusing in situations where it can fuck you up (i.e. C,E stop but not A), hence the convention for generally using the letters. If I was telling someone how to get to Penn Station OTOH I might say ACE or I might say blue or orange.

― Hurting 2, Monday, 23 April 2007 15:09 (eighteen years ago)

(or BDFV)

― Hurting 2, Monday, 23 April 2007 15:09 (eighteen years ago)

The B sucked this weekend.

― Catsupppppppppppppp dude ‫茄蕃‪, Monday, 23 April 2007 15:14 (eighteen years ago)

does the B even run on weekends?

favorite overheard thing recently:
"Yeah son, it's cuz you got a man brain; she got a bitch brain. TWO DIFFERENT BRAINS."

― ian, Monday, 23 April 2007 17:45 (eighteen years ago)

Dunno, I don't understand west side trains. Like the ACE was fucked and I road the D?

― Catsupppppppppppppp dude ‫茄蕃‪, Monday, 23 April 2007 17:48 (eighteen years ago)

walking past two guys talking, one said "why?" and the other answered "'cause she allergic to mad shit!"

― dmr, Monday, 23 April 2007 17:51 (eighteen years ago)

we need another 9/11

― am0n, Monday, 23 April 2007 17:51 (eighteen years ago)

I'm pretty sure there's no B service late nights or weekends, it's a commuter train only. I do seem to recall that the F was fucked over the weekend, tho, so maybe they were all outta whack.

― Laurel, Monday, 23 April 2007 18:08 (eighteen years ago)

Written on the wall @ Metropolitan G:

"ARRRRRRRRRRRH (G) you will miss it over and over"

― BLASTOCYST, Monday, 23 April 2007 18:36 (eighteen years ago)

http://newyork.craigslist.org/mnh/mis/317243130.html

^ joe?

― Catsupppppppppppppp dude ‫茄蕃‪, Monday, 23 April 2007 18:38 (eighteen years ago)

old man to kids making out on the street:
"THAT'S AGAINST THE LAW YOU KNOW."

― ian, Thursday, 26 April 2007 20:37 (eighteen years ago)

speaking of against the law, i came out of my apartment last night and there was this strange car idling outside. i looked at it kind of closely because i live on a quiet street and it was out of place. i was thinking to myself "what is this dude doing sitting here by himself?" when i noticed that he was not, in fact, by himself.

spring has sprung if the hookers are back in the neighborhood.

― chicago kevin, Thursday, 26 April 2007 21:21 (eighteen years ago)

idiot talking VERY LOUDLY on the train the other night: "when i first moved to new york, i would see black women pushing strollers with white children and i thought it was so great that there were so many biracial families in new york. someone finally told me that they were nannies."

i don't know what to say about that one.

― lauren, Thursday, 26 April 2007 21:28 (eighteen years ago)

omfg.

― ian, Thursday, 26 April 2007 22:04 (eighteen years ago)

not as funny as lauren's but last year i was watching world cup with bros at zum schneider? or some east village biergarten, some seriously depraved drunks in the corner with that sort of slumped, beaten look that can only come from starting your day drinking hard at noon.

girl at table opposite us: omg why don't you do something? those guys over there are sieg-heiling each other!
scrawny dude boyfriend: yeah, but they're also laughing
girl: ...
boyfriend: they could just be sieg-heiling ironically

― sanskrit, Friday, 27 April 2007 00:45 (eighteen years ago)

Haha, oh man, Lauren I trust yr instincts but I can almost imagine thinking that myself, when I was new here. I'm not sure I'd announce it on the bus, though.

― Laurel, Friday, 27 April 2007 00:48 (eighteen years ago)

i'm never going to zum schneider again. i always got bad vibes from the place, and then i saw the (german) owner's quote about the situation in which he almost lost his lease - he said that the puerto ricans wanted him out because they wanted to return the neighborhood to the drug and shooting haven it had been before he arrived to clean it up.

― lauren, Friday, 27 April 2007 14:57 (eighteen years ago)

omg, overheard in chinese take-out, baltimore

2 girls reading about someone they know who was shot
girl: damn thats a long obituary
girl2: yeah he was slick like that
guy: you know what obituary mean? "oh bitch you awriigh"
girl2: thats dumb as shit!

― am0n, Tuesday, 1 May 2007 03:57 (eighteen years ago)

two weeks pass...

[overheard b-more edition]

7-11 clerk to customer studying a road map: "do you have a photogenic memory?"

― am0n, Tuesday, 15 May 2007 05:26 (eighteen years ago)

Heard on Chinatown bus from NY to DC, as we passed the Wash Times printing & distribution building:

Young urban guy to his friend: "Whoa, the Washington Times? That must be like...the New York Times, but for Washington."

― Laurel, Tuesday, 15 May 2007 14:38 (eighteen years ago)

HAHAHA

― Hurting 2, Tuesday, 15 May 2007 14:41 (eighteen years ago)

Funny on multiple levels

― Hurting 2, Tuesday, 15 May 2007 14:44 (eighteen years ago)

I count 3

― JW, Tuesday, 15 May 2007 14:56 (eighteen years ago)

That's multiple.

― Laurel, Tuesday, 15 May 2007 14:59 (eighteen years ago)

wait, does young urban guy mean yuppie-like or black?

― Yerac, Tuesday, 15 May 2007 15:16 (eighteen years ago)

why does it have to be either/or you fuckin' racist?~

― chicago kevin, Tuesday, 15 May 2007 15:17 (eighteen years ago)

He was black, actually, and I debated calling him "urban" but went with it cos he was basically just a city kid! Like, only someone who grew up in NYC would think of the NYT as a fixture and never question whether other cities had newspapers too, you know? (Like how it never occurred to me that my home street was called South Shore Drive because it ran along the south side of a lake.)

― Laurel, Tuesday, 15 May 2007 15:20 (eighteen years ago)

my elementary school was called butts road elementary, which never occurred to me was funny until i left.

― Yerac, Tuesday, 15 May 2007 15:21 (eighteen years ago)

URBAN is confusing because it can also mean a STYLE

― Catsupppppppppppppp dude ‫茄蕃‪, Tuesday, 15 May 2007 15:57 (eighteen years ago)

It's confusing for lots of reasons, but he was so much a product of an NYC upbringing that I had to let it all go and stick with "urban".

― Laurel, Tuesday, 15 May 2007 16:01 (eighteen years ago)

We need a better term for NYC myopics.

― Catsupppppppppppppp dude ‫茄蕃‪, Tuesday, 15 May 2007 16:08 (eighteen years ago)

"noize dudes"

― river wolf, Tuesday, 15 May 2007 16:09 (eighteen years ago)

isn't the moonie paper printhouse on New York Ave northbound (ie DC to NY)? or do you see it going both ways?

― gabbneb, Tuesday, 15 May 2007 16:51 (eighteen years ago)

i've only taken a Ctown bus going North, though, I realize

― gabbneb, Tuesday, 15 May 2007 16:52 (eighteen years ago)

six years pass...

[G Train conductor to man walking bicycle down train platform]

"hey, you gonna ride that thing in all that snow?"
"yeah, for a little bit"
"well good luck with that"
"it's more reliable than the MTA"

*cheers and laughter from 20+ people within earshot*

― |$̲̅(̲̅ιοο̲̅)̲̅$̲̅| (gr8080), Tuesday, 17 December 2013 02:32 (twelve years ago)

gr80 wazzup

― eclectic husbandry (Dr Morbius), Tuesday, 17 December 2013 02:35 (twelve years ago)

so true

― Tottenham Heelspur (in orbit), Tuesday, 17 December 2013 02:39 (twelve years ago)

well that ain't the poor conductor's fault

― signed, J.P. Morgan CEO (Hurting 2), Tuesday, 17 December 2013 02:56 (twelve years ago)

Happy to hear that insouciant conductor received his much deserved comeuppance.

― action bronson pinchot (sanskrit), Tuesday, 17 December 2013 17:59 (twelve years ago)

maybe he'll drive the train a little faster next time

― signed, J.P. Morgan CEO (Hurting 2), Tuesday, 17 December 2013 18:06 (twelve years ago)

[overheard in new york City]

This place sucks lol

― Hungry4Ass, Tuesday, 17 December 2013 18:40 (twelve years ago)

Ayyy a pizza pie... ayyy forget about it.... pperonys, lamo

― Hungry4Ass, Tuesday, 17 December 2013 18:41 (twelve years ago)

tbf everyone had to get off at nassau and take the bus to queens, and the driver said "good luck with that" in a pretty smug tone

― |$̲̅(̲̅ιοο̲̅)̲̅$̲̅| (gr8080), Tuesday, 17 December 2013 18:41 (twelve years ago)

teen girl to teen girl friend on E train in Queens: "Jay got into Sarah Lawrence. Do you even know what Sarah Lawrence is? It's like this college for rich kids who aren't dedicated."

― signed, J.P. Morgan CEO (Hurting 2), Wednesday, 18 December 2013 02:32 (twelve years ago)

jay got into a college for rich goths

― lag∞n, Wednesday, 18 December 2013 02:33 (twelve years ago)

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