pickup lines

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― john cougar thornton melloncamp (dubplatestyle), Friday, 8 September 2006 18:24 (twenty years ago)

new cure album?

― cutty (mcutt), Friday, 8 September 2006 22:00 (twenty years ago)

what would be great was if the semen was an aids vaccine... you could get laid ALL the time

― fellini-esque-lit-rockist (tehresa), Friday, 8 September 2006 22:02 (twenty years ago)

― j blount (papa la bas), Friday, 8 September 2006 23:57 (twenty years ago)

WHATS UP NOW?!

― bb (bbrz), Saturday, 9 September 2006 00:07 (twenty years ago)

hot!!!!

― killy (baby lenin pin), Saturday, 9 September 2006 00:13 (twenty years ago)

scene: random brunette, college age w/two blondes in the middle of a side street outside of cambridge somewhere)

random brunette: hey! you! hey you! on the bike stop.
me: are you the police?
random brunete; i want to talk. pleaaase stop.
me: huh? (slows down, u-turn) hey whats up?
random brunette: you know what! i never learned how to ride a bike!
me: oh thats too bad. you should try it sometime.
random brunette: i NEVER learned!
me: thats ok, never too..
randm brunette: my parents were sick all the time and never taught me how to ride a bike.
me: sick all the time? i can relate, oh uuuuuhm you're a little drunk huh
random girl: i never learned how to ride a bike (sad face)
me: ok well you could get a used bike, i was a latebloomer myself
blonde: (death cry/excelsior style) LATEBLOOOOOOOOMER! (wtf)
me: yah, i didnt learn to ride til i was about 8. you could maybe get a used bike, they are all over the place
random girl: but what good is that going to do me if i can not RIDE?
me: true, you need to find someone who will teach you i suppose, look on craigs..
random girl: STRADLES BIKE AND MY LAP
(i grab her round the waist so we both dont fall off and she tries to peddle)
randomd brunette: i am only 120 pounds so lets GOOOO
me: (we get a few feet) i uh really cant manage this, my seat is set too low. ( i have no idea what this means)
blonde: TAXIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIFUCCCCCCCCCCCCCCKSTOP
(i step off my bike (read stand and slide random brunette ass off my crotch) and push random giggling brunette up the hill while she flails her legs about (oh my heart just a little)
second blonde: (runs up to us -pulls water bottle out of my holder, shaking it) This better be VODKA!
me: uh no water
blonde: hey get in the cab katieeeeee
random brunette: whoareyou?iam katie with-an-i. (grabs/hugs me) igotoblahblahskoolblahblahincomprehensible
me: yah, see you
cab takes off about 90 mph
me: (to two random spanish dudes who sit on steps and yell at cars all night) that wasn't so bad.
spanish dude: NOW go FOLLOW her DUDE, FOLLOW HER! GET THAT!

(i went and bought another water and i know this is more random drunk encounter than pick up line but wahtvere)

― kephm (kephm), Sunday, 10 September 2006 05:03 (twenty years ago)

i would say it's more of a blown pickup line than anything

― a name means a lot just by itself (lfam), Sunday, 10 September 2006 05:26 (twenty years ago)

Spanish Dude OTM

― milo z (mlp), Sunday, 10 September 2006 05:41 (twenty years ago)

"me: ok well you could get a used bike, i was a latebloomer myself"

lol i was a me too!

― latebloomer (latebloomer), Sunday, 10 September 2006 05:41 (twenty years ago)

lol i was a me too!

Hahahaha that's exactly what I thought of too.

― Andrew (enneff), Sunday, 10 September 2006 09:46 (twenty years ago)

"are you the police?" lol

― Dan I. (Dan I.), Sunday, 10 September 2006 17:32 (twenty years ago)

http://www.whiteline.com.au/funnies/Australian%20Centerfold.jpg

― trees (treesessplode), Sunday, 10 September 2006 17:42 (twenty years ago)

play it cool.

― trees (treesessplode), Sunday, 10 September 2006 17:43 (twenty years ago)

spanish dude was otm - but gabba gabba hey i am taken. latebloomer you were in my thoughts lol!

― kephm (kephm), Monday, 11 September 2006 00:41 (twenty years ago)

LOL BOSTON.

― Jessie the Monster (scarymonsterrr), Monday, 11 September 2006 01:31 (twenty years ago)

Me: Wow your girlfriend throws a great party
Him: Yeah. Wanna get out of here with me?

this happened tonight.
WHAT. THE. FUCK.

― killy (baby lenin pin), Monday, 11 September 2006 04:47 (twenty years ago)

whta pimp

― capt thinking (Pablo A), Monday, 11 September 2006 04:59 (twenty years ago)

i was at a total cheeseball family luau in maui last week and some chick asked me if i knew where to get good weed. i said no and she started chatting me up like crazy. the wife came over and i said "good luck w/your hunt" and walked away a) why no matter where in the world i am do people assume i have or want to buy weed? b) is this a good pickup line?

― jaxon (jaxon), Monday, 11 September 2006 17:09 (twenty years ago)

was this gonna be like that scene in that movie Go where the english dude hooks up w/the two chix in the hotel in vegas and she sticks tissue up her nose because she can't inhale any other way and then the tissue lights on fire and he runs out the hall naked?

― jaxon (jaxon), Monday, 11 September 2006 17:10 (twenty years ago)

what

― a name means a lot just by itself (lfam), Monday, 11 September 2006 17:21 (twenty years ago)

"Hey girl, know where I can get the dank nugs?"

― trees (treesessplode), Monday, 11 September 2006 22:12 (twenty years ago)

*SLAP*

― trees (treesessplode), Monday, 11 September 2006 22:41 (twenty years ago)

who are these douches?
http://www.thenoiseboard.com/index.php?showtopic=142662

biting our threads

― mr. brojangles (sanskrit), Tuesday, 12 September 2006 14:50 (twenty years ago)

THEY AH FROM BAHSTIN AN DOO NAUGHT MATTAH

― trees (treesessplode), Tuesday, 12 September 2006 22:27 (twenty years ago)

fourteen years pass...

"Hey, are you a light switch? Because you're turning me on! I am a lamp."

― longtime caller, first time listener (man alive), Tuesday, 29 June 2021 20:19 (five years ago)

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