how do i respond to the dog when he is begging for my pizza??

he just jumps on the couch & puts his head in my lap and acts so super cute. attempts to gently nudge him off the couch, as one would with a cat, are met with resistance.

give him a slice

lie to him and tell him the pizza is no good

just talk it out

i just went to dip my crust in some xtras sauce and he SNATCHED IT out of my hand!!!

!!!

Dog wins!

Is cheese bad fr dogs? I relent sometimes and let my cat nom on whatever's left over on the table and then I always find surreptitious spews somewhere a few hours later. Gah!

once i was really drunk and fooling around at a party in front of chatroulette and i was holding a hot dog bun out at dick-level like it was a dick and this dog who was at the party casually strolled up and bit off like half of it

it was the funniest thing that ever happened to me

Haaaa mo wai.

no wai, even.

any kind of greasy people food is dicey for the fur person

x-posts

Yes. Do not let your cat eat fatty raw chuck steak offcuts :(

this past christmas morning, my mom's (admittedly decrepit) sheepdog had a sudden and violently explosive reaction to a plateful of leftover fritatta. so much bad news. this following christmas eve, when the roof of the house caught fire. not due to anything the dog ate.

Nudging off couch obv useless. Remove dog physically and do not feed pizza!

i just went to dip my crust in some xtras sauce and he SNATCHED IT out of my hand!!!

this is a major victory for dogs everywhere

That is kind of disgusting/disturbing behavior from a dog. Don't you get that it leads to even worse stuff? Are you going to think it's cute or a canine triumph when it starts stealing food from guests, or children, or getting more aggressive to get food?

it's a disturbing escalation in the endless power struggle imo

http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_MNK0lQqf-vc/SLVuWEwZ2CI/AAAAAAAADCY/Ks5DsigIiw4/s400/Killjoy1.jpg

Are you going to think it's cute or a canine triumph when it starts stealing food from guests, or children, or getting more aggressive to get food?

yes - the ultimate triumph will be when the dog develops an opposable thumb for more efficient food-snatching & builds a shed in which to store food wins for later

soon you will come home and the dog will be sitting crosslegged in a full three piece tailored suit, smoking a cigar in a louche manner.

I used to have cockroaches like that. Took me forever to figure out why all my clothes were on the floor and my cigarettes were missing. Came home early one day, found waterbugs asking each other "Does this dress make my chitinous exoskeleton look fat?" and ashing on my couch; called exterminator.

cockroaches can totally tell when they're making you uncomfortable like that though, and they will always take advantage. they are the insect bill murray.

otm. They just stand there on the wall too high to reach or risk throwing things at them and stare you down, contemplating your meaningless existence until you fall asleep with all the lights on and a broom in your arms. You wake up later with a start and it is STILL THERE. The cockroach woke you up with its intense concentration.

that is horrible.

Had a cockroach call me drunk once to come pick him up, then he tried to make out with me on the way home. Such a user imo.

I mean, I liked him y'know, but if he respected me he'd take me out to a nice place, maybe a movie, just some romance

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v216/sexymollusk/DSCN0829.jpg

my cat is so patient

'this planit is fucked up and latebloomer is a crul ringmaster'

hahahahahaaha @ that picture

<3 estela haha :)

My cat does that too. Just... sits there, eyes like slits, plotting. Waiting til the food is not under guard. We caught her ON THE STOVE last night eating out of the left over lentils. CATS DO NOT EAT LENTILS.

Earlier tonight I dropped a jalapeño on the floor. Benson not only ate it but also liked it!! O_O

the solution to your problem, ian, is to become vegan. dogs are also fond of steak tacos.

OK here is a tip actually. Puppies hate the clanging noise metal on metal makes. Fill an empty coffee can with some change and keep it near you when you eat. When pup goes to beg shake said can and he should startle and then stop. Of course stopping means he will probably just sit there and stare at you with big puppy eyes but you will probably just need to put up with that.

i bump mine with my knee and push her away; give it to them once and they will do this EVERY TIME

I knew these ppl who had a dog who preferred fruit like melon, bananas and strawberries to dog treats and meat. He would sit there and beg if you were eating some carrots out of the snack tray with the little ranch dressing cup.

that dog is not really a dog, it is actually an alien from outer space, or at least a combination of dog + alien DNA

my german shepherd dog growing up loved nothing in the world more than fruit cocktail, which we discovered in an attempt to play a trick on the dog when he was begging.

true answer is exactly what forks said, never ever feed the dog what you are eating.

your dog growing up was also a combination of dog + alien DNA - it's part of a vast international conspiracy

https://www.instagram.com/p/BE5JYzDNZNt/