your terrible ideas

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a true crime documentary that is actually a live stream of someone just committing crimes live, and interviewing people immediately after committing the crime, like how they felt being robbed

Toonie Orlando (Neanderthal), Thursday, 25 August 2022 03:01 (two years ago) link

The Discreet Charm of the Bourgeoisie, rebooted as a dating-on-an-island reality competition show.

Doctor Casino, Sunday, 28 August 2022 04:01 (two years ago) link

A modern dance version of the Twilight saga, choreographed by Twyla Tharp.

Twylight

gin and tonic the hedgehog (Ye Mad Puffin), Tuesday, 30 August 2022 00:20 (two years ago) link

In 2022, Chubby Checker releases a comeback record of covers done in his typical style: "Simple Twist of Fate", "Twist in My Sobriety", "Playground Twist", etc etc.

Halfway there but for you, Wednesday, 31 August 2022 14:54 (two years ago) link

In 2023, disgraced lead singer of Arcade Fire releases a comeback record of Bowie covers: All you have to do is Win.

Halfway there but for you, Friday, 2 September 2022 00:32 (two years ago) link

A mash up of the Red Hot Chilli Peppers' 'Give It Away' and the theme tune from Spongebob Squarepants played backwards.

Being cheap is expensive (snoball), Tuesday, 6 September 2022 18:33 (two years ago) link

ban Greta Van Fleet

Mr Haaland's Opus (Neanderthal), Tuesday, 6 September 2022 18:34 (two years ago) link

That's actually a good idea.

immodesty blaise (jimbeaux), Tuesday, 6 September 2022 18:54 (two years ago) link

should ukraine invade russia POLL

the late great, Sunday, 11 September 2022 14:53 (two years ago) link

i will queue to see the queen and sell you my place at £1 for every minute i've waited. as soon as i get a taker i'll walk to the back and start again.

koogs, Thursday, 15 September 2022 11:10 (two years ago) link

You could be undercharging: https://www.theguardian.com/us-news/2022/may/05/a-five-day-wait-for-5000-the-man-who-queues-for-the-uber-rich

ledge, Thursday, 15 September 2022 11:22 (two years ago) link

oh wait it's a 24 hour a day gig - ok the price could be right.

ledge, Thursday, 15 September 2022 11:23 (two years ago) link

i'd literally set my own hours

koogs, Thursday, 15 September 2022 11:30 (two years ago) link

VR coffin experience in the metaverse. in real time.

koogs, Thursday, 15 September 2022 15:10 (two years ago) link

https://i.imgur.com/JQqr1LE.jpg

Karl Malone, Thursday, 15 September 2022 15:16 (two years ago) link

a boutique company that makes USA-made, solid-wood furniture in custom "relic" paint jobs to look like the tired, broken, mass-market Ikea and Target furniture you find in thrift stores.

budo jeru, Thursday, 15 September 2022 17:50 (two years ago) link

some sort of hybrid of jenga and poker where every time you bet you have to add your oddly shaped chips to the increasingly precarious stack in the middle of the table. I haven't exactly worked out the rules yet.

longtime caller, first time listener (man alive), Saturday, 17 September 2022 22:29 (two years ago) link

I call it....Joker

longtime caller, first time listener (man alive), Sunday, 18 September 2022 20:26 (two years ago) link

great name

Karl Malone, Sunday, 18 September 2022 20:36 (two years ago) link

what about Pingu tho

assert (matttkkkk), Sunday, 18 September 2022 22:50 (two years ago) link

vacuum hockey tables

put their faith in a god-fearing man selling them tiny homes (Sufjan Grafton), Thursday, 29 September 2022 20:30 (two years ago) link

how does a vacuum hockey table work

Karl Malone, Thursday, 29 September 2022 20:32 (two years ago) link

2 people scraping at the puck with all of their strength, trying to move it even 1 inch

put their faith in a god-fearing man selling them tiny homes (Sufjan Grafton), Thursday, 29 September 2022 20:56 (two years ago) link

Announcing debt relief then saying some with private lenders don’t qualify.

sweating like Cathy *aaaack* (Boring, Maryland), Thursday, 29 September 2022 22:39 (two years ago) link

oh, i play that game. it's called "try to pick up a wet noodle off of the floor"

it's IMPOSSIBLE

xp

Karl Malone, Thursday, 29 September 2022 22:40 (two years ago) link

Belt Sanding Baseball

stank viola (Neanderthal), Thursday, 29 September 2022 22:47 (two years ago) link

Indie rock rewrite of Jesus Christ Superstar in which Judas sings 'Common People' at Christ

Cinta Kaz is comin' to town (Sufjan Grafton), Friday, 7 October 2022 15:25 (two years ago) link

Ornette Grapeman and his Raisins of Jazz - This Is Sour Music

budo jeru, Saturday, 8 October 2022 22:59 (two years ago) link

a movie called “So I Married a Whale Hunter,” an updated filmic version of Moby-Dick, with its most famous song being “Thar She Blows” (to the tune of the La’s)

broccoli rabe thomas (the table is the table), Tuesday, 11 October 2022 11:51 (two years ago) link

Any movie or TV show with horses in it need to list the horses in the credits, with character names.

Like for House of the Dragon it'd be like:

DAEMON TARGARYEN....MATT SMITH

FIRE-MANE THE FEARLESS.........BUTTERCUP OF POOFYDALE

the floor is guava (Ye Mad Puffin), Tuesday, 11 October 2022 13:39 (two years ago) link

meta legs / QWOP mashup

koogs, Friday, 14 October 2022 14:58 (two years ago) link

lol, yes

the first person to get to address the meta virtual conference is...whoever can make it up the virtual stage stairs using their QWOP legs

Karl Malone, Friday, 14 October 2022 15:09 (two years ago) link

a TV channel where someone's living room is randomly displayed for 24 hours, without that person knowing

stank viola (Neanderthal), Friday, 14 October 2022 16:51 (two years ago) link

this will be known as the Patriot Act Channel

stank viola (Neanderthal), Friday, 14 October 2022 16:51 (two years ago) link

I want to make this movie.

https://i.imgur.com/4hjM0Bq.jpeg

I Met Mr. Mathis (I M Losted), Sunday, 16 October 2022 21:24 (two years ago) link

three weeks pass...

elections that civilians are never told the results of

Fash Gordon (Neanderthal), Wednesday, 9 November 2022 14:48 (two years ago) link

two weeks pass...

Rush / Limbaugh, in which an AI-generated audio deepfake of the deceased conservative radio host does spoken-word versions of all the lyrics of 2112.

Like, Shatner "Lucy in the Sky" style.

ooh I wanna take ya to Topeka (Ye Mad Puffin), Wednesday, 23 November 2022 22:14 (one year ago) link

Traffic lights that, instead of turning red or green, turn infrared and ultraviolet.

Halfway there but for you, Monday, 28 November 2022 19:21 (one year ago) link

every time i see an old timer's thread bumped on ILM, i get the urge to simply post "dang, RIP" just to momentarily bamboozle whoever opens the thread next

budo jeru, Thursday, 8 December 2022 03:28 (one year ago) link

sort of a reverse shakey, if you will

budo jeru, Thursday, 8 December 2022 03:29 (one year ago) link

Damn, RIP

G. D’Arcy Cheesewright (silby), Thursday, 8 December 2022 04:00 (one year ago) link

Christian cannabis brand or podcast called Praise ’n Blaze

G. D’Arcy Cheesewright (silby), Sunday, 11 December 2022 21:07 (one year ago) link

Bryan Ferry sings... the Songs of Autechre

Urbandn hope all ye who enter here (dog latin), Sunday, 18 December 2022 10:32 (one year ago) link

kraftwork's neon lights but replace 'neon' with 'christmas'. and maybe the synths with glockenspiels.

ledge, Sunday, 18 December 2022 19:10 (one year ago) link

Autechre should make a Christmas album

silverfish, Tuesday, 20 December 2022 22:40 (one year ago) link

wasn't Tri Repetae their christmas album?

designer office supply store but instead of office depot it’s called office DRIPot

the late great, Tuesday, 27 December 2022 18:02 (one year ago) link

A single-issue presidential campaign: every street in the country with the same name should eventually connect if you follow them far enough.

New York Review of Wooks (swim), Tuesday, 27 December 2022 22:13 (one year ago) link


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