UNCLE WATSON GOES TO THE ZOO

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A TALE OF TRAGEDY TOLD IN CAPS LOCK

― matt damon, Wednesday, 4 May 2005 01:27 (twenty-one years ago)

UNCLE WATSON WENT TO THE ZOO
HE GOT A CUP OF SODA AND VISTED THE KANGAROO HABITAT

― matt damon, Wednesday, 4 May 2005 01:28 (twenty-one years ago)

THE KANGAROOS LOOKED UPON UNCLE WATSON WITH SCORN
UNCLE WATSON FLED FROM THE KANGAROO HABITAT WEEPING

― matt damon, Wednesday, 4 May 2005 01:29 (twenty-one years ago)

UNCLE WATSON WAS LOST IN THE ZOO FOR DAYS
EVENTUALLY HE FOUND HIMSELF AMONGST THE POLAR BEARS

― matt damon, Wednesday, 4 May 2005 01:30 (twenty-one years ago)

MARTHA, QUEEN OF THE POLAR BEARS, TOOK HIM UNDER HER PAW
SEVERAL DAYS LATER THEY WERE WED

― matt damon, Wednesday, 4 May 2005 01:31 (twenty-one years ago)

THERE WAS DANCING
AND FISH FOR EVERYONE
THE ZOO WAS DECORATED WITH RIBBONS AND RAW MEAT

― matt damon, Wednesday, 4 May 2005 01:33 (twenty-one years ago)

EVERYONE PARTIED HARD
SO HARD THE ZOO CAUGHT FIRE

― matt damon, Wednesday, 4 May 2005 01:34 (twenty-one years ago)

UNCLE WATSON TRIED TO STOP THE FIRE BUT HIS EFFORTS WERE IN VAIN
HE CLIMBED TO THE TOP OF THE HIGHEST TREE IN KOALA LAND

― matt damon, Wednesday, 4 May 2005 01:35 (twenty-one years ago)

THE SMELL OF BURNING FUR WAS EVERYWHERE
UNCLE WATSON WISHED HE HAD A CELLULAR TELEPHONE SO HE COULD ORDER A PIZZA

― matt damon, Wednesday, 4 May 2005 01:35 (twenty-one years ago)

BUT WHEN IT WAS OVER EVERYTHING WAS COOL

― mattdamon, Wednesday, 4 May 2005 01:36 (twenty-one years ago)

BECAUSE AS IT TURNS OUT HAVING SEX WITH THE SMOLDERING HUSKS OF DECAYING ZOO CREATURES IS WHAT UNCLE WATSON WAS BORN TO DO

AND SO IT WAS

― matt damon, Wednesday, 4 May 2005 01:39 (twenty-one years ago)

nije, is this you?!

― roxymuzak (roxymuzak), Wednesday, 4 May 2005 02:14 (twenty-one years ago)

nope

― nijoli (nijoli), Wednesday, 4 May 2005 09:28 (twenty-one years ago)

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