your terrible ideas

1. An adaptation of Blood Meridian scored by Def Leppard

2. I'll move to San Francisco
3. Make a monster costume out of a dirty shag rug
4. Mobile DJ at English pub in a town an hour away using a PA I've never used

5. date down

6. date

1. An adaptation of Blood Meridian scored by Def Leppard

7. An adaption of The Mikado done entirely using mobile ringtones.

8. a book about combat rock compared/contrasted with the 1982 worlds fair

9. (another music one, but that's what I save most of my truly bad ideas for) An album made entirely using samples from Lou Reed's "Metal Machine Music" and Presley's "Having Fun With Elvis On Stage" (because they are supposedly the worst two albums ever made - my theory being that I could make an even worse-er album by combining them).

10. putting chilli sauce on vanilla ice cream - one mouthful was enough to cause projectile vomiting.

11. marinara sauce and peanut butter

12. Going back to school.

nah, that's a great idea.

13. Starting the thread "What does 'rockist' mean?"

14. A pop group exclusively made up of 2 year olds called Diaper Rash.

13. Starting the thread "What does 'rockist' mean?"

― bamcquern, Saturday, July 4, 2009 11:05 AM (1 hour ago) Bookmark

if your original post was a gigantic picture of goatse with an embedded sound clip of, i dunno, somebody having explosive diarrhea or something, then it'd be a pretty great idea

15. deciding you wanna ride a goddamn ferris wheel

16. 1p3

rong

17. Sell white rice dyed brown to exploit gullible newcomers to the health food world (long time health food consumers would probably see right through the scam.) The brand would be called "Rice that is Brown" rather than "So-and-So brown rice" and list the ingredients in super timy print.

eh..tiny print

haha the next step would be "Rice that is Multiethnic" and it would just be bag of Fruity Pebbles.

would that actually like... save you any money?

slocki you don't get it--IT'S A TERRIBLE IDEA!

1. An adaptation of Blood Meridian scored by Def Leppard

7. An adaption of The Mikado done entirely using mobile ringtones.

18. an adaptation of Do You Remember Love?/Macross for the musical theater/broadway stage.

maybe less terrible and more so not gonna happen why bc i am lazy

im dying over rice that is brown

19. Putting a book of my poetry out
20. Taking up a drug habit on the back of the highly unlikely profits from this anthology of work (any suggestions for the drugs?)

idk I've actually been pretty impressed with yr writing. Honestly.

21. Combination mezzuzah and bottle opener, so you're never at a loss with a cold beer in your hand.

(xxpost) not my terrible idea, but someone once suggested to me, in all seriousness, that I become a smack head in order to guarantee that I could continue to claim benefits.

patoetry plzzz

art project involving tramp stamps, semen and polaroid camera.

A Terrible Plan!

tramp stamps on actual tramps

like, hoboes

i thought it would be great an edgy brooklyn gallery! you know, like, transgressive sexuality & the mainstream appeal of defacing the body. or something.

you have to go for that obsessive all-over-composition style in the installation ... also you need typewritten descriptions of the context for each photo

make the stamp say something edgy like "FEMINISM" or "ART" or something

the images will be titled with the content of the stamp.

for example:
daisies no. 2
chinese character nos. 1-3

maybe you can install them onto a traced map of your city, with push pins, and place them in the locations where the people live or were photographed, and it could be a commentary on gentrification or routes travelled.

I'm trying to combine all the edgy art trends I can think of ...

^feelin this

http://regretfulmorning.com/wp-content/uploads/2008/12/dunk-hunt-tramp-stamp.jpg

http://purefnevyl.files.wordpress.com/2007/11/corinthians_tramp_stamp.jpg

http://www.thesicness.com/pics/march09/03072009/tramp_stamp.jpg

I think a pretty funny tramp stamp would be a second asshole

http://rlv.zcache.com/tramp_stamp_inspector_mug-p168228570079141682qzje_400.jpg

idk I've actually been pretty impressed with yr writing. Honestly.

u drunk

Nope and I still stand by that statement.

"dunk hunt"

20-something. momus hosts a cooking show called "cumin in a girl's mouth"

I've seen those in trains. Not a terrible idea, but they often don't work.

But the handle will be dirty

― Bad Bairns (Boring, Maryland), Sunday, August 18, 2024 2:11 PM (yesterday) bookmarkflaglink

lol exactly, see thread title

There is a bucket of disposable, single use handles for people who are concerned about that*

*the handles are sitting in pickle juice

https://pbs.twimg.com/media/GU7cPbEXsAA_AOA?format=jpg&name=small

I was thinking, did I once see a pic of Russian public toilets with glass barrier walls, not like the self-cleaning sealed Japanese ones that turn opaque as soon as you shut the door. No, just glass.

Golf umbrella javelin. Just like regular javelin, but with a golf umbrella instead of a javelin.

Instead of releasing these £200 expanded box sets, they should rerelease classic albums with a bunch of tracks missing and/or faded out early and sell then for like £8. I mean, who's got the time and/or money these days ya know?

the irregular underwear of music

or the box sets could be reliced and made to look like they were stolen from Target, missing 7 of the 8 LPs, liner notes have been encrusted with a true-to-life snot stain and "weed" crumbles. this would obviously make them more expensive, though, not less

Two chocolate bars that combine the top and bottom halves of a Snickers and a Double Decker. 'Dickers' = the peanuts & caramel top of the Snickers combined with the biscuit-crispy bottom of the Double Decker. So called because that's what you'll say when inevitably bits of it get stuck in/between your teeth/filling. 'Milky Why?' = the nougat half of both bars.

― Being cheap is expensive (snoball), Wednesday, 15 July 2020 20:16 (four years ago)

I tried this out this afternoon and it is indeed a terrible idea. The 'Milky Why?' has an interesting flavour, being comprised of two different chocolates and two different nougats. But without the biscuit base of the Double Decker, that nougat almost has the texture of cheap bubblegum. I was left chewing for a while. The 'Dickers' manages to be even worse. I correctly predicted the dental hazard of this combination but the texture and flavour I didn't expect. It was like eating a piece of coarsely crumbling tarmac coated in chocolate, and there was a strong aftertaste of burnt caramel and peanuts.

I misread something last night as Da Vinci Donuts, then decided that a great name for a donut chain would be Masterpiece Donuts

Hamster Dance! Live on Broadway

a coffee shop called Scone Depot

A version of Biggies "Juicy" where all he does is list video game consoles

A cover version of Chris Spedding's "Motorbikin'" titled "Microwavin'".

Double Polkas on the Dot: A Polka Tribute to Minutemen

Instead of releasing these £200 expanded box sets, they should rerelease classic albums with a bunch of tracks missing and/or faded out early and sell then for like £8. I mean, who's got the time and/or money these days ya know?

Capitol Records actually did this with major catalogue items in the late 80s, like a version of The Band with two tracks omitted so they would have to pay a marginally smaller royalty rate. Worst example I ever saw was a cassette of Ummagumma with one-and-a-half sides of music removed with no explanation or caveat.

i mean they did it in the '60s too with the Beatles records, although i guess those weren't reissues

Records that change after multiple plays

Global Hypercolour (Hypersound?) record that changes songs/genre/mood depending on temperature.

A radio that pauses the song halfway through until you put more coins in

Bat Santa

The KISS hologram concert, except Gene Simmons is replaced by 1974-era Ron Mael

an alternative to instant messaging services where messages are delayed a few hours or only delivered 2-3 times a day, like the mail used to be

this way you don't need to check your messages all the time and you'll be less prone to send unnecessary messages

xp replace Paul Stanley with Russell Mael as well and I'm in.

A reboot of the Ted Rogers game show 3-2-1, except the questions are generated by an AI.

a band called Th Ebeatles

(pronounced "the e-beatles")

Neep Space Dine - a Star Trek themed restaurant that only serves swede-based dishes.

A hipster brand that sells expensive T-shirts with designs that are very obviously and deliberately incredibly shit AI

band named Food Network that plays only food-based parodies of Television songs. "torn...CRUTON", "I pre...I pre soak...I pre soak...lentttttiiiiiilllls", etc.

that's an excellent idea actually

A Weird Al version of Biko by Peter Gabriel called "Bilko"

massive lols at that

"Proof it... The yeast breeeead!"

A GG Allin tribute band fronted by a Dalek.

Blade Runner: Origins. CGI Roy Batty grinning like a madman as he hangs out of the side of a burning attack ship watching c beams glitter in the dark near the Tannhauser Gate.

He says to himself: “This will make a great story someday!”

ha, perfect

movie opens with a factory worker eating foam lunch. they finish up, belch loudly, and rejoin their post ON THE RICK DECKARD ASSEMBLY LINE.

love it

A Bear Family-style CD box set of the complete Nixon White House tapes

I mistook a lilo and stitch bumper sticker for a jamiroquai sticker and now I want to go around putting jamiroquai stickers on teslas

Don't look back, you can never look back

Reimagining of Uncle Vanya where the entire play is Vanya's niece, Sonya, knocking on the door, but Vanya can't hear because he's in the other room.

The only dialogue is Sonya calling out "Uncle Vanya!" in growing exasperation.

3 acts

Kidnapping Underworld and making them play a concert within 100 miles of me

Like I’d arrange a venue and sell tickets and advertise everything I’m not selfish

A film about a destination wedding taking place over a weekend, except people start getting murdered, it's meant to balance whodunnit with horror in equal measure, the "final girl" has Miss Marple observational skills but none of the sanctimony, instead it's pure fear; could also be a "final boy". Anyway that's the pitch. The title of the film is: "I Do, You Die".

a two sided triangle

I am intrigued by your ideas, sir; I like the cut of your jib and would like to subscribe to your newsletter

unfortunately due to related design difficulties the actual cut of our jib has presented significant challenges as far as making newsletter production meetings goes