rolling "what a fucking idiot" thread

you hired homeless people to kill your wife http://www.cnn.com/2010/CRIME/05/16/tv.chef.arrested/index.html?hpt=T1

you are a fucking idiot

that article prob belongs in the "wtf @ cnn.com thread" but w/e -- what a surreal piece of writing

The criminal complaint filed Monday accused Cruz, 48, of trying to hire David Carrington and David Walters -- homeless men who go by the street names Little Dave and Big Dave -- to murder Jennifer Campbell, Cruz's wife. It was not immediately clear who was Little Dave and who was Big Dave.

"They gave us two pizzas, a 12-pack of beer and a bottle of San Jose," he said. "I love them."

btw this thread is no ilx meta

wow

ha good disclaimer, J

takin all the fun out of it imo

What kind of booze is San Jose?

CHICOPEE, Mass. (WGGB) -- A Northampton man is in trouble with police after he allegedly offered a baby girl in exchange for alcohol.

Around 1:00 p.m. Monday, Chicopee Police were called to the Pride Station on Burnett Road, according to Chicopee Police Capt. Thomas Charette. He said that a repairman had struck up a conversation with another man, identified by police as 24-year-old Matthew Brace, at the gas station. During the course of their conversation, Charette says Brace allegedly offered the three month old baby girl he was holding to the repairman in exchange for two 40 ounce containers of alcohol.

When officers arrived, they found Brace hiding with a stroller and the child behind a dumpster, says Charette, who adds that during the conversation, the baby's mother was inside Pride purchasing cigarettes.

In addition, the Mass. Department of Children and Families was also called to the scene and Charette says DCF has taken custody of the girl.

Brace, whose last known address is in Northampton, will be summonsed to court on a criminal complaint of reckless endangerment of a child. The baby's mother has not been charged.

gotta get more than two 40s for a baby!

The criminal complaint filed Monday accused Cruz, 48, of trying to hire David Carrington and David Walters -- homeless men who go by the street names Little Dave and Big Dave -- to murder Jennifer Campbell, Cruz's wife. It was not immediately clear who was Little Dave and who was Big Dave.

cnn write patting self on back for getting this one through

everything about both of those stories is amazing

I should have waited on starting that thread about the latest brazen Harvard liar because that story could have gone here, only the idiot would have been both the liar and Harvard.

i love that tmz was able to track down and talk to the daves, and yet cnn still couldn't even figure out which one is the tall one and which one is the short one

assholes can be idiots too
http://www.thesmokinggun.com/archive/years/2010/0520101tattoo1.html

One of the assailants was 19 and another was 20. And both were in high school...

so fucked up

Why do people even have mohawks anymore?

lool, read a little closer; the 19-year-old and 20-year-old had graduated from high school

kid in the ironic DARE shirt is the worst

None of the arrestees actually knew the victim's name, referring to him in police interviews as "Poop Dick" or "Spiderman,"

he was told that if he got their tattoo first, he could then get the tattoo that he wanted, which was a celtic cross with his girlfriend's name on his arm

aw

lol & he's the one with the girlfriend

those motherfuckers in grizzly bear did it again

oh man poor poop dick ;_;

"prison break" this was not

BreakingNews Update: Body found in El Paso, TX-area landfill may be federal inmate who escaped by hiding in trash bin - AP

http://www.cnn.com/2010/CRIME/07/28/virginia.teacher.porn/index.html?hpt=T2

Another student apparently reported the alleged offense to police after seeing a Facebook message from Ricks posted on the 16-year-old's Facebook page that read, "You told me our experience was your first with a guy," according to the complaint.

also for the "rolling 'what a fucking asshole' thread"

"It is understandable how some may see me in a negative light, but like other people in this world, I have had many positive accomplishments in my personal life and career. I would like people to consider those as well," the statement said, according to the Post.

NOPE NOTHING UNUSUAL OR NOTABLE AT ALL

teve O’Dell, who lived two doors down from the home rented by Snyder and his girlfriend, said he occasionally gave Snyder work painting houses. O’Dell said his neighbor didn’t seem unusual other than his occasional expression of racist views and a professed belief in “Odinism,” an ancient religion often associated with white supremacists.

“They weren’t real fond of black people,” said O’Dell. “And it was kind of like: ‘well if you feel that way, you’re kind of living in the wrong damn neighborhood.’ ”

Similarly, Hodgson and her husband didn’t notice anything unusual about the family other than the fact that Synder was always home. But looking back, Daniel Hodgson noted that just days after Snyder and his girlfriend moved into the Florence Avenue home in 2003 or 2004, a neo-Nazi flier appeared on the Hodgsons’ front door asking if they were interested in joining.

onanism

What a fucking idiot, and a complete bell-end:

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-london-11397515

ha, shaquille o neal is being accused of doing this in a lawsuit

http://blogs.miaminewtimes.com/riptide/2010/09/shaq_hit_with_lawsuit_for_plan.php

http://tv.gawker.com/5657495/angry-man-bashes-elevator-with-his-scooter-falls-down-shaft

lord help him

well he's dead, so

hahahaha

catholics!

I notice that when scooter guy first crashes into the door and backs up, he gives a little shrug, like, "that probably wasn't a good idea, but eh, I reckon I'm due for some good luck." I don't buy for a second that he was angry.

I feel really bad for him and his loved ones, but

what did he think was gonna happen? could he not see that the elevator wasn't there? did he think that the elevator was there and just not opening for him? i don't get it

I have no clue either!

the (Korean) title of the youtube clip translates to "Disabled War crash", which seems about right, actually.

what a dumb, dead dumbass

actually made me kind of sad

http://web.archive.org/web/20060903080823/http://www.pbfcomics.com/archive/PBF101AD-The_Shortcut_Express.jpg

fuck. 100% my fault but i clicked that link without reading anything and just watched the video. i didn't know i wasn't going to watch somebody die.

^sort of a mushbag

wow. saw the vid in kind of lol but mostly sad, but it cut off where he first hit the doors

i wonder if max could shed some light on why Gawker writers are like seven hundred leagues more talented Gawker.tv writers.

WHOAOAOA DARWIN AWARDS NOMINEE COMING THRU WHAT A DOPUCHEBAGG

Thing is you don't see the guy actually die, you just see him fall down the elevator shaft so it's not beyond the pale for all these big blogs to post the video and for people to pass around the link and for all of us to sit in front of our computers and watch a dude's last moments for a few seconds before clicking onto something else and letting it completely pass out of our minds.

i thought than when you applied for a job at gawker, like they give you a test about worthless and hacky "Darwin Awards" sub-dad jokes like they would ask a copy editor about "were" vs. "we're".

seriously anyone who still does a "Darwin Awards" ""joke"" in 2010 is dumber than a guy repeated slamming his rascal into the elevator doors

the video made me shudder cuz watching someone's last dying moments is eerie but at least it wasn't like the Budd Dwyer suicide video!

i don't think writing ability is the #1 factor in getting hired by gawker.tv -- i would say ability to find funny clips on tv all day and capture the video from TV and edit it in a timely fashion might be a higher priority

but what do i know, i'm not the guy who parodies everyone's voice in all caps

Why is Gawker so popular? The writing?

― kshighway (ksh)

<3

I am the worst possible type of DOPUCHEBAGG and I cordially invite you to punch me until I die

i wrote that post fyi

so thats why youre so popular

xpost, that is not true because i can spot a max post a mile away fwiw

AKA THE PILSBURY DOPEBOY

wait am i the pilsbury dopeboy or

doi