here's a pats thread for everyone to talk about patritos shit because nobody else cares

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eh, it's at least better than the creepy moustache he was sporting toward the end of the season

Moodles, Wednesday, 9 May 2012 18:09 (twelve years ago) link

two months pass...

craziest celebrity sighting out where i was working in central park: robert kraft arm in arm with his "gal pal". there was kissing. I totally wigged out and was staring, definitely not cool.
it's weird, actors and musicians don't impress me at all (ansari showed up if you wanna name drop and it's very whatever), but anyone connected with athletics gets me startstruck

I dont even know that I think this sucks per se (forksclovetofu), Tuesday, 24 July 2012 06:58 (twelve years ago) link

Only autograph I've ever asked for is from Ozzie Smith. I feel you, bro.

pplains, Tuesday, 24 July 2012 15:33 (twelve years ago) link

Rob Gronkowski, Aaron Hernandez, Jake Ballard, Visanthe Shiancoe

pun lovin criminal (polyphonic), Tuesday, 24 July 2012 22:58 (twelve years ago) link

how did vikings let shiancoe walk? do they have any receivers? but maybe they don't have a qb either so why bother?

seriously, THIS GUY (daria-g), Wednesday, 25 July 2012 04:27 (twelve years ago) link

I'm looking forward to the pats introducing the world to the all TE offense

Moodles, Wednesday, 25 July 2012 05:05 (twelve years ago) link

with wes welker running around them like a minicooper

I dont even know that I think this sucks per se (forksclovetofu), Wednesday, 25 July 2012 06:43 (twelve years ago) link

one month passes...

wow, hernandez tied up thru 2018. that's 6 more years of gronk-hernandez action in the books. no news on $ yet.

Roberto Spiralli, Monday, 27 August 2012 12:35 (twelve years ago) link

Upon agreeing to a five-year contract extension on Monday, Patriots tight end Aaron Hernandez made a charitable gesture that owner Robert Kraft acknowledged in remarks Monday evening at the team's annual charitable foundation gala.

"One of the touching moments since I've owned the team -- knowing that this is our charitable gala tonight -- Aaron came into my office, a little teary-eyed, and presented me with a check for $50,000 to go to the Myra Kraft Giving Back Fund," Kraft said. "I said 'Aaron, you don't have to do this, you've already got your contract.' And he said 'No, it makes me feel good and I want to do it.'

call all destroyer, Wednesday, 29 August 2012 13:43 (twelve years ago) link

<3 AH

Johnny Fever, Wednesday, 29 August 2012 15:30 (twelve years ago) link

Nice

set the controls for the heart of the sun (VegemiteGrrl), Wednesday, 29 August 2012 15:32 (twelve years ago) link

Aaron came into my office, a little teary-eyed, and presented me with a check for $50,000 to go to the Myra Kraft Giving Back Fund," Kraft said. "I said 'Aaron, you don't have to do this, you've already got your contract.'

^this is maybe top ten shittiest things i've ever heard

This cad needs a cordial introduction to Eugene of Oxbow. (forksclovetofu), Wednesday, 29 August 2012 17:14 (twelve years ago) link

Yeah, re-reading that, Robert Kraft sounds like a total dick.

Johnny Fever, Wednesday, 29 August 2012 17:16 (twelve years ago) link

bob kraft is a slimeball

Hungry4Ass, Wednesday, 29 August 2012 17:17 (twelve years ago) link

i think bob was probably joking but otherwise yes

call all destroyer, Wednesday, 29 August 2012 17:19 (twelve years ago) link

http://www.inquisitr.com/wp-content/2012/07/Robert-Kraft-Ricki-Lander-e1343483592259.png

"You don't have to do this, you've already got your contract."

pplains, Wednesday, 29 August 2012 17:22 (twelve years ago) link

ha

Johnny Fever, Wednesday, 29 August 2012 17:22 (twelve years ago) link

i am grateful for how he runs the pats but, considering him as an individual, i can't get past the blue shirt with the white collar.

Roberto Spiralli, Wednesday, 29 August 2012 17:23 (twelve years ago) link

the whole thing where his old lady dies and its the biggest tragedy in the history of dead wives, and then a few months later hes porking the christ out of a 20 year old model, is pretty gross to me.

Hungry4Ass, Wednesday, 29 August 2012 17:24 (twelve years ago) link

or at least a little tacky.

Hungry4Ass, Wednesday, 29 August 2012 17:26 (twelve years ago) link

AH - Mr. Kraft, I... I...
RK - Get the fuck in here lil Gronk, you're wetting up my foyer with your eye-pussy juice.
AH - Um, Mr. Kraft I just... I wanted...
RK - Spit it out Frankenstein.
AH - ...um... I wanted to contribute this five figure check in honor of Ms. Kraft.
RK - What? I'm not married!
AH - The late Ms. Kraft.
RK - Oh! Right! Her. Lemme see that.
AH - Here you go sir.
RK - Hm. Four zeros, huh? You know we already signed you right?
AH - Sir?
RK - You've already got your contract. Nobody likes a brown noser.
AH - No, it makes me feel good and I want to do it.
RK - Eh, whatever. Look, you want a kleenex or something? You got snot on your jersey.

This cad needs a cordial introduction to Eugene of Oxbow. (forksclovetofu), Wednesday, 29 August 2012 17:27 (twelve years ago) link

:O

Johnny Fever, Wednesday, 29 August 2012 17:58 (twelve years ago) link

hoyer released. was on the cards.

Roberto Spiralli, Friday, 31 August 2012 17:20 (twelve years ago) link

branch released! so NOT on the cards. wtf

Roberto Spiralli, Friday, 31 August 2012 17:55 (twelve years ago) link

so no branch, gaffney, or stallworth??

call all destroyer, Friday, 31 August 2012 18:02 (twelve years ago) link

rip patritos cool branch

johnny crunch, Friday, 31 August 2012 18:05 (twelve years ago) link

yeah, all gone. welker, lloyd, edelman, slater as the principal WR corps.

Roberto Spiralli, Friday, 31 August 2012 18:08 (twelve years ago) link

*waves goodbye*

set the controls for the heart of the sun (VegemiteGrrl), Friday, 31 August 2012 18:08 (twelve years ago) link

i will keep my team name in memoriam

Roberto Spiralli, Friday, 31 August 2012 18:09 (twelve years ago) link

patriots wish every receiver was a slot receiver.

call all destroyer, Friday, 31 August 2012 18:30 (twelve years ago) link

clearly there is a plan in mind here, but i am not sure what it is. i guess maybe they plan to keep one of those middling fullbacks they had in camp, play a ton of 1FB/2TE and 3TE. brady can't be happy to see all those WRs melt away.

Roberto Spiralli, Friday, 31 August 2012 18:37 (twelve years ago) link

they haven't thrown to the second non-slot wr in years, guess they figure why start now.

call all destroyer, Friday, 31 August 2012 19:35 (twelve years ago) link

As much as I love Branch, I can't say that he was that central to their strategy last year. I feel confident that they'll manage to be successful without him.

Moodles, Friday, 31 August 2012 19:51 (twelve years ago) link

koppen moving on is sad but he is clearly done

Roberto Spiralli, Friday, 31 August 2012 20:13 (twelve years ago) link

http://espn.go.com/blog/boston/new-england-patriots/post/_/id/4728508/resetting-the-53-man-roster

the 53 as it currently stands. only 22/53 on offense, when was the last time a team put together a roster with 4 RB, 4 TE and 4 WR

Roberto Spiralli, Saturday, 1 September 2012 01:39 (twelve years ago) link

kinda surprised that tarpanian got cut

call all destroyer, Saturday, 1 September 2012 01:50 (twelve years ago) link

yeah 2 or 3 mid roster guys on D that stepped in and did a job last year got dumped. these are low profile players that i think bill figures are unlikely to get picked up and will be there if needed through the season.

Roberto Spiralli, Saturday, 1 September 2012 02:02 (twelve years ago) link

get excited: in the scouting report reiss pulled on this greg salas guy, he is described as a potential 'jason avant type'

Roberto Spiralli, Saturday, 1 September 2012 20:37 (twelve years ago) link

did you all see this article about gronk and his family

http://sportsillustrated.cnn.com/vault/article/magazine/MAG1205810/2/index.htm

As Dan recalls, after the first week Welker said, "I thought I was going to have two idiots sitting next to me in the locker room, but Dan's a little more intelligent than Rob."

That notorious Super Bowl party the night of the Patriots' loss, at which he got drunk and took off his shirt? "Dude, it was the Patriots fans who got me drunk!" he told me, incredulous. "What was I supposed to do, turn down the shots?"

seriously, THIS GUY (daria-g), Monday, 10 September 2012 22:44 (twelve years ago) link

The WiFi network at his house is labeled BigG; his ringtone is the guitar riff from George Thorogood's Bad to the Bone.

on page 1 and this article is already priceless

call all destroyer, Monday, 10 September 2012 23:54 (twelve years ago) link

And there it was: a vast subterranean weight room with a 10-foot ceiling ("so you can do proper pull-ups," Gordy said), riven by heating ducts and exposed pipes. ... This is where three of the boys, particularly Rob and Glenn, did much of their weight training, roaring at each other the Gronkowski training motto: "Do it to get chicks!"

seriously, THIS GUY (daria-g), Tuesday, 11 September 2012 00:12 (twelve years ago) link

lol

set the controls for the heart of the sun (VegemiteGrrl), Tuesday, 11 September 2012 06:45 (twelve years ago) link

new board description imo

set the controls for the heart of the sun (VegemiteGrrl), Tuesday, 11 September 2012 06:45 (twelve years ago) link

branch is coming back. no great surprise.

Roberto Spiralli, Wednesday, 19 September 2012 00:10 (twelve years ago) link

two weeks pass...

http://i537.photobucket.com/albums/ff331/itsme131313/FaEHZ.jpg

call all destroyer, Wednesday, 3 October 2012 14:24 (twelve years ago) link

amazing

Roberto Spiralli, Wednesday, 3 October 2012 14:57 (twelve years ago) link

oh hey is cadfap still happening

I might be late due to completely forgetting about a reunion event happening this weekend

set me on fire RAAAAH (DJP), Wednesday, 3 October 2012 15:10 (twelve years ago) link

yeah if u guys are still down

call all destroyer, Wednesday, 3 October 2012 15:41 (twelve years ago) link

I'm supposed to be at a reunion singthrough from 2 until 4; what I may actually do is leave at 3 or just skip it altogether (since there will be a dinner the previous night)

set me on fire RAAAAH (DJP), Wednesday, 3 October 2012 15:43 (twelve years ago) link


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