Miami Dolphins Thread of Despair

Have Lemons? Make Lemonade.

I would kind of love the orange-and-teal paper bag to become the cheesehead of south florida

dammit you're letting him complete all these passes in THIS field condition?

INT!

I'm not watching the game now, but -- from the EPSN NFL GameCast -- it looks ugly. First Downs: Steelers six, Dolphins none. Total Yards: Steelers 80, Dolphins 11. Total Plays: Steelers 16, Dolphins 3.

B.A.D. bad.

the field has no lines

lol the other announcers wanting no part of kornhiesers weed-neutral rant

well it's only ugly because of the field.

and I can't say it's HURTING the dolphins. But Beck still looks nervous. But Cam is doing some stupid playcalling. the one time Beck threw on first down it set up a first down a play later. Let him throw more. You're 0-10. are you really afraid of ...gasp...a turnover?

Yeah. I hated the Dolphins lethargic last drive. They should have hurried to the line and let Beck throw. It's just not a sufficient moral victory to go to halftime as an 0 -- 10 team in a zero-zero tie.

yea I was miffed about that too. Guess this is the first ever conservative 0-10 team.

I'm going to the game next week. I really hope I get my money's worth

I didn't know that Miami had also signed Keith Traylor. That is one old defense.

I think Beck's going to be a pretty good player.

ok, I officially don't like Cam Cameron.

Now after being too conservative before the half, he gets too aggressive and goes on 4th and 15.

NOw, I agree that the FG may have gone horribly off kilter, but (barring a block) I'd have rather tried that than go on 4th and 15th when Pittsburgh was obviously going to blitz.

Or PUNT. at least win the field position game. Now we're gonna keep starting drives at the 5, 10, and 15.

We've had Traylor for the last two years.

and agreed on Beck

out two timeouts already. great (and one was Cam's fault, just like last week).

This is the most boring game of the last...oh, three seasons?!

yea, and for my team's sake I'm glad. but I can't imagine watching this if I had no vested interest in the game. yech.

I didn't see the game last week, so I was kind of interested in seeing Beck at qb. Tonight's not the night to gauge him, tho.

he's actually not done bad all things considered. I mean this is getting frustrating to lose all of our running backs.

This is the most boring game of the last...oh, three seasons?!

You apparently haven't been following the Dolphins this year.

This game is riveting, judged on a curve. That punt drove into the turf!; most exciting Dolphins-related play this season.

I'm not convinced that step on Ricky's back couldn't have been avoided. I mean, I know normalcy is suspended when there's a loose ball, but that kind of looked like a Steeler went out of his way to stomp Ricky.

I hate Tony Kornheiser.

that kick was hilarious

does anyone find it funny that he found it ludicrous that Miami would think of a 48 yard field goal yet he basically said it'd be stupid for PIttsburgh not to try a 44 yarder?

Hold . . . Hold . . .

Gah. Where is our pass protection?

Oy vey, that kick.

FUCKING. FIRE. THIS. COACH.

DEAR WHOEVER IS IN CHARGE,

FIRE CAM CAMERON!

THX,
JF

geez I mean the field goal may have looked like shit again but come on, 4th and 11? again?

Cam, go fuck yourself.

Fire Cameron immediately after the game.

Can the NFL suspend a coach for negligence?

LOL.

So, only 90 yards to go. NP.

I mean...I'm the nicest guy in the world when it comes to Miami coaches. I defended Wannstedt.

But NOTHING I've seen this year tells me Cam is ready to be a coach. He has the worst time management skills of any coach (blows timeouts due to not feeding in playcalls among other things)...and....I...just....

a tie isn't so bad. only 21 more minutes.

wow wow I just got home and ate and turned this on
wow wtf

i actually really like terico, korny & jaws as a broadcasting team..too bad MNF gets such a shitty scheduling of games

this game seems like that legendary mich-osu game where the teams were punting every 1st down in hopes the other team would eff up

The MNF announcers are laughing at us.

Please dear God I swear I will burn all of my Deicide cds if Miami can force a fumble and run it all the way back for the game winning TD. I'll even go on tour with dc talk

Who is/are Deicide? Like ICP?

BJO, you unbanned from ILM? You need to be.

Dammit, Pittsburgh.

if we lose this I'm gonna be on suicide watch.

not just cuz we lost. but cuz they coulda saved me 3 hours by losing 42-0

I'd kind of like to see overtime now, just for the wtf-ness of it.

Oh, don't worry: We are going to lose this game.

WE Dolphins fans must have been child murderers in another life.

No. It's just payback for the perfect season. Sadly, the Patriots are riding a karma wave because of all their horrible teams in the 70s/80s.

How sad.

god...fucking...dammit.

God, just for that, I'm joining the Church of Satan

Ginn = miracle man?

so do the '76 buccaneers get together and pop champagne in the event that the dolphins eventually win?

Um, no.

x-post

They made a joke earlier about the 76 Bucs tapping a keg.

i know i'm likely the only ilx'or interested in the dolphins, but anyone interested in good comedy, or who is morbidly fascinated watching an organization disassemble from incompetence and bumbling, should read-up on miami's off-season.

a sampling today on twitter, reacting to the hiring of dennis hickey as GM, from those who cover the team:

Armando Salguero ‏@ArmandoSalguero -- Dolphins Scorecard: 4 candidates declined first interview, 1 finalist declined second interview. 1 man offered the job turned it down. (NOTE: now it's confirmed that two, not one, finalists were offered the job and turned it down; nick caserio and lake dawson)

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Armando Salguero ‏@ArmandoSalguero -- Dolphins say reason Nick Caserio didn't accept job is he wanted to fire Joe Philbin and Dolphins wouldn't allow.

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Armando Salguero ‏@ArmandoSalguero -- Dolphins tell me Lake Dawson was willing to keep Philbin but wanted say over his status in future. Ross keeps that.

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Ian Rapoport ‏@RapSheet -- When #Dolphins search began, Ross said GM would have “autonomous responsibility for 53-man.” Yet candidates believed Philbin would have it

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cover32 Dolphins ‏@cover32_MIA -- Last resort, second last resort...all semantics...fact is that (hickey) was option number 5 or 6 on the list.

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Adam Beasley ‏@AdamHBeasley -- I've been told that several Dolphins players have already privately expressed that they want out of this situation. Real consequences coming.

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Adam Beasley ‏@AdamHBeasley -- Another take: "Tampa is psyched. They were going to fire (new dolphins GM dennis hickey) anyway. Now they don't have to pay him."

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Chris Kouffman ‏@ckparrot -- Dolphins situation worse than I thought.

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mike freeman ‏@mikefreemanNFL -- Some of the things personnel men around the NFL are saying about the Dolphins is hilarious. Lots of jokes, disbelief.

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Chris Kouffman ‏@ckparrot -- Brian Gaine, who acted as de facto GM during Senior Bowl and was supposed to be the reason it was OK for Philbin & Co to skip it, is LEAVING.

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Rizz ‏@Rizzmigizz -- These Dolphins have done the impossible, made me wish they were playing again so the pain would go away. It's normally the opposite

https://pbs.twimg.com/media/Be7VG4_CEAAnu93.jpg

to have a guy come in from the same division and want to fire the HC as a condition, probably you just want to can that HC anyway. amazing really.

interestingly, caserio tonight said he liked philbin, and didn't insist on firing him as a condition of caserio taking the job. it's the fins' representatives who said caserio made that demand. in that regard

Chris Kouffman ‏@ckparrot -- Dolphins say Caserio turned job down because he wanted to fire Philbin. Caserio directly denies he wanted to fire Philbin. I believe Caserio

oh boy

more on this:

Adam Schefter ‏@AdamSchefter -- Source close to Lake Dawson insists that, for GM job, he never requested final say on whether MIA HC Joe Philbin would be back after 2014.

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Chris Kouffman ‏@ckparrot -- If you ask me the Dolphins are lying their asses off about their cover story for why Caserio and Dawson rejected them.

I never even think about the Miami dolphins during the season, but this is great fun

three of the worst linemen in the league on one offensive line. you dream of luck like this.

last dropback, center and both guards got pushed around like IKEA furniture.

no matter how many draft picks we throw at the position, we get Dig Dug characters at the position

lol solved the offense problem now the defense breaks.

I kinda wonder once you do get one of those fancy passing attacks what happens is that teams have to throw the ball to keep up and the you find out your team cannot stop the pass.

This was pretty much the Colts under Manning all the time and really kinda the Dolphins when they had Marino too.

Yeah I didn't start watching the Fins til 1989 and though he has a really good defense in 1992, the fear was often "great, we got the lead! How long will our defense keep it?".

Then by the time he acquired Jimmy Johnson's defense, they were running the ball much more than with Shula (without talented RBs to do it) and Dan had lost a step and couldn't take advantage

Hilarous thing was the Dolphins were all about the defense and running game before Marino started blasting bombs left and right with very workman like QB play (ex. David Woodly took them to a superbowl with the Killer Bs. D).