most fucked team 09

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who is most fucked

Poll Results

OptionVotes
raiders 11
rams 7
browns 2
cowboys 1
redskins 1
panthers 1
bills 1
texans 0
seahawks 0
bucs 0
lions 0
chiefs 0


autogoon delight (J0rdan S.), Monday, 5 October 2009 21:50 (fifteen years ago)

Definitely not the Cowboys or Texans.

Your heartbeat soun like sasquatch feet (polyphonic), Monday, 5 October 2009 21:53 (fifteen years ago)

buffalo feels more fucked but oakland is more fucked

all yoga attacks are fire based (rogermexico.), Monday, 5 October 2009 21:54 (fifteen years ago)

I think Buffalo would beat Oakland at least seven times out of ten.

Your heartbeat soun like sasquatch feet (polyphonic), Monday, 5 October 2009 21:55 (fifteen years ago)

where are the titans?

omar little, Monday, 5 October 2009 21:56 (fifteen years ago)

I think the worst of those teams might be the Rams. They looked really terrible yesterday.

Your heartbeat soun like sasquatch feet (polyphonic), Monday, 5 October 2009 21:56 (fifteen years ago)

the rams are most fucked, they just look absolutely worthless on the field

omar little, Monday, 5 October 2009 21:57 (fifteen years ago)

xp!

omar little, Monday, 5 October 2009 21:57 (fifteen years ago)

this is tough--i'd say rams in terms of on-field talent, raiders in terms of coaching/management/general direction.

yellow card for favre (call all destroyer), Monday, 5 October 2009 21:58 (fifteen years ago)

I voted raiders, but then I just remembered the rams game yesterday...just a sad, sad team to watch. browns #3.

iatee, Monday, 5 October 2009 21:59 (fifteen years ago)

Lotta bad teams this year when my Dolphins can't even get on this poll.

Daniel, Esq., Monday, 5 October 2009 21:59 (fifteen years ago)

yeah i guess the titans could be pretty fucked but i still think they'll finish 7-9 or 8-8 this year. cowboys inclusion was basically trolling.

autogoon delight (J0rdan S.), Monday, 5 October 2009 21:59 (fifteen years ago)

the dolphins made the playoffs last year and have the hardest schedule in the nfl, so i kept em off here even if they do go 6-10 this year

autogoon delight (J0rdan S.), Monday, 5 October 2009 22:00 (fifteen years ago)

Seriously, I think we'll be lucky to go 6 -- 10. I think we're headed for 1 -- 7 by midseason.

Not that the Dolphins are so bad. Just a very, very tough schedule, and the injury to CP.

Daniel, Esq., Monday, 5 October 2009 22:01 (fifteen years ago)

raiders in terms of coaching/management/general direction.

I think they're way closer to being good, but don't think they'll get there.

Your heartbeat soun like sasquatch feet (polyphonic), Monday, 5 October 2009 22:01 (fifteen years ago)

my vote is the rams

this is one of the worst teams i've ever seen. i don't fundamentally understand how you could collect so many worthless players. like, you would think somewhere along the line you would fine a fifth player who is of worth (i'm counting steven jackson, the safety whose name i can't pronounce, the kicker and donnie avery but he is borderline even), but no, they certainly haven't. i've never seen a team who looks more hopeless on offense than these guys. i think steven jackson's salary should be doubled by the nfl for pain and suffering.

autogoon delight (J0rdan S.), Monday, 5 October 2009 22:02 (fifteen years ago)

i think the only team that maybe has less offensive talent than the rams right now is the browns

autogoon delight (J0rdan S.), Monday, 5 October 2009 22:03 (fifteen years ago)

oh, do we just mean for this season? I was thinking, like, for all time. hence raiders until Al Davis runs out of careers to suck the life out of and dies of starvation.

all yoga attacks are fire based (rogermexico.), Monday, 5 October 2009 22:03 (fifteen years ago)

their plan to move on from aging stars torry holt, isaac bruce, and kurt warner really worked out

omar little, Monday, 5 October 2009 22:04 (fifteen years ago)

i think the only team that maybe has less offensive talent than the rams right now is the browns

I think the Browns are better.

Your heartbeat soun like sasquatch feet (polyphonic), Monday, 5 October 2009 22:07 (fifteen years ago)

oh, do we just mean for this season? I was thinking, like, for all time. hence raiders until Al Davis runs out of careers to suck the life out of and dies of starvation.

― all yoga attacks are fire based (rogermexico.), Monday, October 5, 2009 5:03 PM (4 minutes ago) Bookmark

yeah i mean, taking into account what has transpired here in 09 and looking towards the future, which team do you think is most permanently fucked. the raiders is obv a good choice because of al davis' impending existence

autogoon delight (J0rdan S.), Monday, 5 October 2009 22:09 (fifteen years ago)

I voted for the Rams, because they just seem miserable, but I kind of feel like the Chiefs deserve some noise for making such giant changes in the offseason, without really seeming noticeably better for having done so. Like, the Rams might be OK in a couple of years, but the Chiefs seem like they might have poisoned the franchise for a long while.

The Raiders do probably have the two biggest problems (Al Davis and JaMarcus Russell), but they almost seem to find talented dudes in spite of themselves.

C-L, Monday, 5 October 2009 22:13 (fifteen years ago)

I don't understand how you go into a season with a receiving corps of Laurent Robinson, Donnie Avery, Danny Amendola, Keenan Burton, Brooks Foster, Nate Jones, and Ruvell Martin. It's like when you ask a megahipster who his influences are. "Oh, I'm really into Danny Amendola lately."

Your heartbeat soun like sasquatch feet (polyphonic), Monday, 5 October 2009 22:17 (fifteen years ago)

I don't understand how you go into a season with a receiving corps of Laurent Robinson, Donnie Avery, Danny Amendola, Keenan Burton, Brooks Foster, Nate Jones, and Ruvell Martin.

this is what i'm saying. like, the vikings ended up with greg lewis but not you guys?

autogoon delight (J0rdan S.), Monday, 5 October 2009 22:24 (fifteen years ago)

the chiefs might secretly be the right answer - if bill simmons' SOURCES are correct and pioli was really along for the belichick ride in NE than they could have handed their franchise over to a false profit and a system qb. they have no notable defensive players, glenn dorsey hasn't panned out at all, larry johnson is cooked, jamaal charles is a good change of pace/3rd down back but he can't carry the load, dwayne bowe is good but he's no, like, andre johnson

autogoon delight (J0rdan S.), Monday, 5 October 2009 22:25 (fifteen years ago)

I don't buy the Pioli thing. They say that every time someone leaves New England.

Your heartbeat soun like sasquatch feet (polyphonic), Monday, 5 October 2009 22:29 (fifteen years ago)

But the Cassel signing was definitely unwise. Not sure Cassel is a better QB than Tyler Thigpen.

Your heartbeat soun like sasquatch feet (polyphonic), Monday, 5 October 2009 22:29 (fifteen years ago)

They say that every time someone leaves New England.

― Your heartbeat soun like sasquatch feet (polyphonic), Monday, October 5, 2009 5:29 PM (1 minute ago) Bookmark

and they all have bombed except.... mcdaniels?

autogoon delight (J0rdan S.), Monday, 5 October 2009 22:31 (fifteen years ago)

And Dimitrioff.

Your heartbeat soun like sasquatch feet (polyphonic), Monday, 5 October 2009 22:32 (fifteen years ago)

Plus, I don't think Parcells would let a dumb dude marry his daughter.

Your heartbeat soun like sasquatch feet (polyphonic), Monday, 5 October 2009 22:33 (fifteen years ago)

I am kind of receptive to the idea of Pioli getting credit for personnel moves that were largely Belichick's doing, but a lot of that might be my willingness to believe that Bill Belichick is basically the Richard Nixon of football, the sort of dude who is as obsessed with strategies to embarrass and humiliate his enemies as he is about strategies of winning games of football.

C-L, Monday, 5 October 2009 22:36 (fifteen years ago)

and they all have bombed except.... mcdaniels?

who canned his likely franchise qb over... cassel.

honesty is not ordinary to the height of the bunny hop (Hunt3r), Monday, 5 October 2009 22:40 (fifteen years ago)

yeah, hence the ellipses

autogoon delight (J0rdan S.), Monday, 5 October 2009 22:41 (fifteen years ago)

Cassel is throwing at 59.6% with 5 TDs and 2 INTs. He has a higher QB rating than Tony Romo, and is just a shade behind Tom Brady and Kurt Warner. Despite not having a running game or Tony Gonzalez around.

And Kyle Orton has a higher QB rating than Cutler, and honestly has looked pretty sharp imo.

I know Cutler is better, but the Broncos got a lot in return for the guy.

Your heartbeat soun like sasquatch feet (polyphonic), Monday, 5 October 2009 22:47 (fifteen years ago)

if cutler really is a franchise qb, then 5 number ones is like, not enough- u just dont do that trade. if he isn't, denver did well. in the end, orton's relative performance is a small determinant of success/outcome of trade. there isn't much middle ground when youre talking real franchise qbs. imo.

honesty is not ordinary to the height of the bunny hop (Hunt3r), Monday, 5 October 2009 23:01 (fifteen years ago)

honestly has looked pretty sharp imo

did you watch the whole game yesterday? there is a small set of throws he can actually make, and he over and underthrows anything over 15 yards almost at random.

honesty is not ordinary to the height of the bunny hop (Hunt3r), Monday, 5 October 2009 23:02 (fifteen years ago)

did you watch the whole game yesterday?

I only watched what they showed on RedZone.

Your heartbeat soun like sasquatch feet (polyphonic), Monday, 5 October 2009 23:06 (fifteen years ago)

(topic du jour on denver sports radio- is it time to give orton a big time contract extension?)

i wish i had kool-aid pitcher gif.

honesty is not ordinary to the height of the bunny hop (Hunt3r), Monday, 5 October 2009 23:22 (fifteen years ago)

It's like when you ask a megahipster who his influences are. "Oh, I'm really into Danny Amendola lately.

lmao

johnny crunch, Monday, 5 October 2009 23:24 (fifteen years ago)

Browns+Rams+Buccaneers+Raiders clusterfuck '09 (I can't choose who's worst out of these four teams).

Johnny Fever, Monday, 5 October 2009 23:27 (fifteen years ago)

I excluded the Bills and Redskins because they have a ton of talent, and could be fixed right up with a change at the sidelines or the front office.

Johnny Fever, Monday, 5 October 2009 23:28 (fifteen years ago)

not that they're the be all end all but football outsiders really likes orton--i think he might be pretty good too.

yellow card for favre (call all destroyer), Monday, 5 October 2009 23:29 (fifteen years ago)

Kyle Orton could be a solid QB for a club that has a good running game. Orton is pretty streaky as a QB. Other than fluke crazy plays like the one against the Bengals, he hasn't successfully taken the ball and drove 80 yards to win a game. Orton came close last year in Atlanta, then he got beat when Ryan pulled of a miracle ending. That being said, Orton is 25-12 as a starter, which is pretty impressive. If he stays productive and not turn over the ball, I figure he will be the Broncos QB for a while. I'd think McDaniels will probably do that NE style short passing game and I could see Orton doing that somewhat OK. I've got my doubts that Orton could be a guy to bring your team back a couple of TDs in the last quarter, but stranger things have happened and the guy has improved a bit every year he has played.

Orton is definitely getting the revenge is living well, look at some of the other guys from his draft class.

Drafted before Orton (Fail)
Alex Smith
Jason Campbell
Charlie Frye
Andrew Walter (oak)
David Greene (sea)

Good one- Aaron Rogers

Drafted after Orton
Derek Anderson
Ryan Fitzpatrick

Good one- Matt Cassel

earlnash, Monday, 5 October 2009 23:34 (fifteen years ago)

Orton to me is the rich man's Shaun Hill.

Your heartbeat soun like sasquatch feet (polyphonic), Monday, 5 October 2009 23:36 (fifteen years ago)

cowboys- They have talent, but I think they are paying premium rates for some dudes that are not gamers. The O-line is old and slow and will be the real problem going forward. Their defense only seems to show up about half the time.

redskins - screwy owner...until he hires a real GM and just sits back and signs the checks, it won't work. Dude needs to get anal on keeping up his stadium and let football people run the club.

lions- It has to be better as someone different is drafting. They might be a year or two out, but I think they have bottomed out as a club.

panthers- they are decent, but god awful boring on offense. Owner seems to stick with players he likes like Jake, which isn't what they need. They seem to only be good every other year and this is the bad one.

bucs- They got old as dirt and this is a total rebuilding project. They hired a pretty young coach, which could go either way I suppose.

rams- (see Bucs) They seem to be pretty awful and it is probably going to take a couple of drafts to rebuild. I thought the guy they hired was one of the better canidates, but we will see. That guy Marinelli that was coaching the Lions last year seems like a pretty solid guy, it just didn't work at all.

seahawks- They have some talent, but they have been pretty much injury plagued for over 2 years. The West power has switched, but they are probably not as far as some clubs.

bills- I don't know this club, but they obviously don't have a QB (again) and seem to be fraying early instead of a few weeks in which is what happened the last couple of years.

browns- They are a mess, but they have some talent on D...worse thing is that they have a QB controversy (again) and just too many embarrassing players.

texans- I think they have talent on both sides of the ball and could end up with a winning record. Don't know what happened week 1, but they got clocked.

raiders- They didn't look too bad in the Chargers game, but Russell is obviously regressing. That Gratkowski guy had a couple of decent starts for the Bucs. I'd be putting Russell on the bench and fining him everytime he gets a Snickers bar if he pouts. They need a real GM but it won't happen until the old dude kicks it. Coach maybe getting fired as he is going to end up in jail is pretty bad.

chiefs- They are rebuilding, they had to pretty much rebuild from the bones of the Vermil clubs. I don't think they are as far away or embarrassing as some of these other clubs.

earlnash, Monday, 5 October 2009 23:58 (fifteen years ago)

dope post

autogoon delight (J0rdan S.), Tuesday, 6 October 2009 00:13 (fifteen years ago)

xp so which one is most fucked?

also, lol @ understatement:

Coach maybe getting fired as he is going to end up in jail is pretty bad.

yellow card for favre (call all destroyer), Tuesday, 6 October 2009 00:17 (fifteen years ago)

Bucs are the worse club I have seen play. They didn't do anything right against the Giants and looked stupid at times especially on defense like they didn't know what was going on. I was kind of surprised how many pro-Giants people were in the crowd two weeks ago.

The Raiders and Browns the times I saw them play looked better than the Bucs, but it is obvious that they have been pretty horrendous in some of the other games.

I haven't really seen the Bills, Chiefs or Rams play yet this year.

Going from last year, problem with the Chiefs was their QB play last year was near the worse in the league. I figure even where they were last year just adding Casell should improve them a couple of games, if he can stay healthy.

Seahawks could move the ball a bit and Seneca Wallace looked better than the other times I have saw them play. The Colts offense pretty much rang out Seattle's D doing whatever they wanted to do. The Colts could have scored 50 if they really put the pedal to the metal and tried to bury them. Thing is that the Colts don't really try and do that like they did a few years back. They get up 14-17 and they start running the ball and trying to control the clock.

earlnash, Tuesday, 6 October 2009 00:28 (fifteen years ago)

Raiders are probably a bit more fucked than the Browns, as it is pretty much a wreck, but the Bucs look pretty horrible. Bucs are pretty young and might get it together as the season goes along.

earlnash, Tuesday, 6 October 2009 00:30 (fifteen years ago)

they obviously don't have a QB (again) and seem to be fraying early instead of a few weeks in which is what happened the last couple of years.

the only thing wrong with Trent Edwards is that he can't block for himself and they continue to lose bodies in what was already a bit of a patchwork line. that's the fraying you're seeing. not that every team isn't dealing with its share of injuries but this one's pretty one-for-one in terms of impact on team performance.

all yoga attacks are fire based (rogermexico.), Tuesday, 6 October 2009 00:36 (fifteen years ago)

I haven't seen them play since last year, so I don't doubt that about the Bills o-line. Buffalo has definitely been helter skelter in the past decade. One year they have a good offense, the next year they cannot move the ball at all. Losman looks like he knows what he is doing, then he is on the bench. It just seems like that pattern is happening again with Edwards, who was the hot QB for a while. All of that failure is a total team problem, but the QB gets the blame but that's the breaks.

The terrible O-line is why the Bengals have not been as good in the past couple of years. Cincy had a good o-line as they were getting good with Kitna and then with Palmer, then they all got old or beat up at the same time. Until the end part of last season, they really had not been able to run the ball very well and with their defense being so pourous, they counted on Palmer to have to put up huge numbers every week while getting creamed by blitzes.

I think that is the one thing about Cutler going to the Bears is that he gives Chicago a bit of quick strike offense when the defense wears down from injuries in the second half of the season (which has happened a bunch over the past few seasons). Before the D wears down and they just don't have any margin for error with their offense setup, as it mostly had to come on the ground, now they can air it out and maybe make up that extra score.

earlnash, Tuesday, 6 October 2009 00:46 (fifteen years ago)

One thing I'll say for JaMarcus is that his receivers dropped a TON of balls yesterday, and the offensive line is a sieve.

Your heartbeat soun like sasquatch feet (polyphonic), Tuesday, 6 October 2009 00:49 (fifteen years ago)

btw there are plenty of buffalo fans who will be happy to tell you all the things that are wrong with trent edwards, they're just wrong. he's not a hall of fame QB but he looked pretty decent for the first two weeks. then blam-o.

NB there are teams that can get away with losing 50% of their starting O-line and 50% of their defensive starters and buffalo is not one of them.

all yoga attacks are fire based (rogermexico.), Tuesday, 6 October 2009 00:52 (fifteen years ago)

i really don't like edwards tbh

yellow card for favre (call all destroyer), Tuesday, 6 October 2009 00:53 (fifteen years ago)

I excluded the Bills and Redskins because they have a ton of talent, and could be fixed right up with a change at the sidelines or the front office.

this is what is so tragic, everyone in dc knows this but the front office is the thing that seems like it will never change. so i voted redskins

daria, actually (daria-g), Tuesday, 6 October 2009 01:48 (fifteen years ago)

rams in the short term, but really raiders until al davis croaks

mookieproof, Tuesday, 6 October 2009 02:33 (fifteen years ago)

edwards is okay, a team with a better situation could make a run with him. switch him out with shaun hill and no team gains or loses anything and the niners are gonna make the playoffs.

autogoon delight (J0rdan S.), Tuesday, 6 October 2009 03:00 (fifteen years ago)

edwards looks mechanically sound (and has a great quick release) but he doesn't seem to have one skill he really excels at and throws his share of wtf interceptions. i'm not sure if shaun hill isn't his ceiling.

yellow card for favre (call all destroyer), Tuesday, 6 October 2009 03:11 (fifteen years ago)

the dolphins beat us by like 94 points. i know we're us but they don't belong on this poll.

horseshoe, Tuesday, 6 October 2009 14:30 (fifteen years ago)

i think rogermexico is probably right about edwards not being that bad but i am so filled with hate these days it is hard for me to tell.

horseshoe, Tuesday, 6 October 2009 14:34 (fifteen years ago)

certainly our o-line is a hot mess

horseshoe, Tuesday, 6 October 2009 14:35 (fifteen years ago)

would've gone with the browns if last weeks game had ended in the 1st quarter (browns with 52 seconds time of possession) but they looked like a pro team the rest of the game for the first time this year.

brownie, Tuesday, 6 October 2009 14:59 (fifteen years ago)

Gotta say Raiders as long as Davis is alive.

Alex Quebec (WmC), Tuesday, 6 October 2009 15:06 (fifteen years ago)

Easterbrook today:

Dick "Cheerio, Chaps" Jauron is all about lowering expectations. He's in his fourth season of talking about how the Bills may not win now because the team needs to rebuild for the future. Multiple Bills injuries have Jauron just where he likes to be, not expected to win. His ultra-blasé attitude sure is infectious! But the front office isn't performing in Buffalo, either. Blowing high picks (J.P. Losman, John McCargo); trading away the team's best player (Jason Peters) because he was due for a raise; bringing in a gimmick to sell tickets (Terrell Owens); and granting a contract extension to Jauron, who is 58-80 as an NFL head coach, has lost eight straight division games and barely seems to care -- Buffalo now rivals Oakland for the league's worst-managed franchise.

all yoga attacks are fire based (rogermexico.), Tuesday, 6 October 2009 17:29 (fifteen years ago)

If Rush Limbaugh manages to buy the Rams, my vote will change.

Alex Quebec (WmC), Tuesday, 6 October 2009 17:31 (fifteen years ago)

Rams; I thought they looked fucked till '11 in 08 and they're still right there.

forksclovetofu, Tuesday, 6 October 2009 17:48 (fifteen years ago)

I think we did this poll last year?

forksclovetofu, Tuesday, 6 October 2009 17:48 (fifteen years ago)

deadspin makes a credible case for the skins:

At least Al Davis is fucking old. Yeah yeah, he's a vampire and can't be killed blah blah blah. The reality is, that old man is gonna croak WAY before Dan Snyder does. And when that happens, there's a chance the Raiders could end up in the hands of someone who isn't a complete fucking nutbar. And at least Davis had the courtesy of waiting until he was old and senile before turning incompetent. Even Mike Brown makes a good decision once in a blue moon. Even the LIONS managed to fire Matt Millen. They took eight fucking years longer than they should have, but it did happen. Redskins fans are offered no such comfort.

http://deadspin.com/5377099/the-most-hopeless-franchise-in-football--jamboroo-week-5

all yoga attacks are fire based (rogermexico.), Thursday, 8 October 2009 20:51 (fifteen years ago)

From 2005-present the Redskins are 34-34. They are 2-2 this year (albeit a fluky 2-2), and didn't have a losing record in either of the previous two years. And they play in the toughest division in football. I don't think it's the Redskins.

Your heartbeat soun like sasquatch feet (polyphonic), Thursday, 8 October 2009 20:54 (fifteen years ago)

I don't either. But I like the notion of Snyder as Al Davis without the expiration date.

all yoga attacks are fire based (rogermexico.), Thursday, 8 October 2009 21:03 (fifteen years ago)

i think that's the thing--the redskins could conceivably be 8-8 forever.

don't blame pitchfork, blame america (call all destroyer), Thursday, 8 October 2009 21:05 (fifteen years ago)

keep in mind there are fans who would kill for a guaranteed 8-8 forever

all yoga attacks are fire based (rogermexico.), Thursday, 8 October 2009 21:09 (fifteen years ago)

there are fans who miss and long for the Wade Phillips years

all yoga attacks are fire based (rogermexico.), Thursday, 8 October 2009 21:11 (fifteen years ago)

haha sometimes those fans are me :(

horseshoe, Thursday, 8 October 2009 21:46 (fifteen years ago)

LALALA, FANS, DAN CAN'T HEAR YOU! HE'S WEARING HIS JACUZZI SUIT!

everyone kills people (the schef (adam schefter ha ha)), Friday, 9 October 2009 17:18 (fifteen years ago)

Automatic thread bump. This poll is closing tomorrow.

System, Friday, 9 October 2009 23:01 (fifteen years ago)

Automatic thread bump. This poll's results are now in.

System, Saturday, 10 October 2009 23:01 (fifteen years ago)

really?

Winky (Jimmy The Mod Awaits The Return Of His Beloved), Sunday, 11 October 2009 04:48 (fifteen years ago)

good results ime

don't blame pitchfork, blame america (call all destroyer), Sunday, 11 October 2009 06:35 (fifteen years ago)

yeah i can't argue with the top 2

kushighway (J0rdan S.), Sunday, 11 October 2009 06:36 (fifteen years ago)

lions - 0 seems to be based on the fact that they hit nfl's historic rock bottom / nowhere but up

but still, they deserve at least a vote...

iatee, Sunday, 11 October 2009 06:41 (fifteen years ago)

almost every one of these teams would die for stafford + calvin johnson tho imo

kushighway (J0rdan S.), Sunday, 11 October 2009 06:44 (fifteen years ago)

too early to say w/ stafford imo, dude's got a total of 1 win under his belt. imagine redskins had scored 1 more td - lions are 0-4 and the narrative is 'will lions go without a win two years in a row??'

iatee, Sunday, 11 October 2009 06:50 (fifteen years ago)

true but based on what i've seen the only team with a better qb situation on this list are the texans and cowboys and maybe the seahawks depending on whether or not hasslebeck will ever play a full season again

two of these teams will have bradford & mccoy next year tho

kushighway (J0rdan S.), Sunday, 11 October 2009 06:53 (fifteen years ago)

I really like Jim Schwartz as a coach so far. I think him plus Johnson, Stafford, and not-Millen is a good core.

Your heartbeat soun like sasquatch feet (polyphonic), Sunday, 11 October 2009 17:35 (fifteen years ago)

ok i now agree with these results

omar little, Sunday, 11 October 2009 18:00 (fifteen years ago)

Some of the teams with 0 deserve some votes.

Your heartbeat soun like sasquatch feet (polyphonic), Sunday, 11 October 2009 18:02 (fifteen years ago)

ok watching this game today i think maybe the raiders deserved another vote, ie my vote, cos what is this?

everyone kills people (the schef (adam schefter ha ha)), Sunday, 11 October 2009 18:07 (fifteen years ago)

jesus christ, raiders: http://sports.yahoo.com/nfl/news;_ylt=AvNp3eyN_frptfyKPtEWCL45nYcB?slug=ms-hansonspeaks101009&prov=yhoo&type=lgns

all yoga attacks are fire based (rogermexico.), Sunday, 11 October 2009 19:39 (fifteen years ago)

boo yahoo link. here's the text:

WALNUT CREEK, Calif. – When Oakland Raiders coach Tom Cable told his assistants after a sloppy Aug. 4 training-camp practice that he planned to meet privately that night with the team’s defensive backs, Randy Hanson was sure how things would play out.

“You know what’s gonna happen there,” Hanson, a defensive assistant who had worked closely with the team’s secondary, predicted to a small group of fellow staff members. “Tom’s gonna come out of the meeting and say I’m the problem, that I’m the one confusing them and blame it all on me.”

Hanson was right: Later that night, Cable informed him that the Raiders’ cornerbacks and safeties had pegged him as “the problem,” exacerbating the tension that Hanson says had been festering between the two coaches since January, when Hanson was hired by owner Al Davis before Cable had been offered a permanent head-coaching role.

What Hanson says he never saw coming was an alleged violent attack by Cable the following morning that left him with a fractured jaw and a polluted relationship with the franchise he has loved since childhood.

“From my blindside, Tom Cable threw me from my chair and into a piece of furniture that a lamp sat upon,” Hanson told Yahoo! Sports Friday during an extensive interview at a Bay Area restaurant. “He was screaming, ‘I’ll f——- kill you! I’ll f——- kill you!’ And I have no reason to believe he wouldn’t have killed me if they hadn’t pulled him away.

“If my head would’ve hit a different way, I might be dead right now.”

In his first public comments since the Aug. 5 incident that took place in a meeting room at the Marriott-Napa Valley, Hanson repeated the version of events that he gave to a Napa Police Department detective late last month. According to a source close to the investigation, three witnesses – Raiders defensive coordinator John Marshall, defensive backs coach Lionel Washington and assistant defensive backs coach Willie Brown – also provided statements to police investigators which corroborated Hanson’s account of the incident.

The two-month investigation is now under review by Napa County district attorney Gary Lieberstein, who could decide to file felony assault charges against Cable. Hanson’s San Francisco-based attorney, John McGuinn, told AOL FanHouse last week that “this really is a textbook case of felony assault.” Cable, who has reportedly retained a criminal defense attorney, could be seeking a plea deal that might allow him to avoid jail time.

Cable may also face discipline under the NFL’s personal conduct policy. According to Greg Aiello, the league’s senior vice president of public relations, commissioner Roger Goodell did not meet with Cable this weekend during the team’s visit to New Jersey – the 1-3 Raiders face the New York Giants on Sunday – and no meeting is currently planned. However, Goodell acknowledged earlier during the week that the league is “closely monitoring the case.”

The Raiders did not respond to requests Saturday by Yahoo! Sports to speak with Davis, Cable and Marshall, and separate phone calls to Washington and Brown were not returned. Reached Saturday night by phone, Marshall confirmed he had been interviewed by a Napa Police officer and said, “I can’t talk about any of this.”

Cable has previously denied attacking Hanson, claiming in an Aug. 18 interview following a training-camp practice that “nothing happened” and later insisting that “when the facts come out, everything will be fine.”

Hanson, 41, who is still getting paid by the Raiders, says he never wanted the incident to be publicized and sent a letter to the organization saying he would accept a reassignment of duties to avoid being a distraction to the team. A fervent Raiders fan since his days growing up in western Washington’s Skagit Valley, Hanson said he still roots for the team – he showed up for Friday’s interview wearing a thick, black shirt with a silver “Raiders” logo.

Though it has been suggested that Hanson was a snitch for Davis who reported to the owner about the behavior of his fellow coaches, he adamantly denied that depiction. However, Hanson conceded that Cable “might have been paranoid about my relationship with Mr. Davis because I was hired by him.”

Known for his intense work ethic and aptitude in breaking down opponents’ tendencies, Hanson was a highly regarded offensive assistant during a three-year stint with the Minnesota Vikings from 2003 to 2005.

“Randy Hanson’s a great coach,” said former Vikings center Matt Birk(notes), a perennial Pro Bowl selection now with the Baltimore Ravens. “He would break down opposing defenses for us, and he was outstanding. He’s an extremely hard worker. That used to be the joke – he never stopped. He’d sleep in the office and watch every bit of tape he could find.”

Added former Vikings quarterback Brad Johnson(notes): “I really enjoyed being around him. He brought a lot of flavor to the room and to the field, and I thought he had a lot of insights into game plans.”

After spending the ’06 season with the St. Louis Rams, Hanson was let out of his contract to join first-year coach Lane Kiffin’s Oakland staff because, he says, then Rams-coach Scott Linehan was aware of his devotion to the Raiders. In Oakland, he worked as an assistant secondary coach in charge of third-down defenses and impressed his fellow coaches with his knowledge of opposing offenses and his ability to convey his insights to the players.

“He knows what the opposing team’s gonna do before they know what they’re gonna do,” said one former Raiders assistant who worked closely with Hanson. “That’s how much tape he watches. And he’s a damn good football coach, too.”

After making some disparaging locker-room comments about the Raiders’ preparation following the team’s 41-14 defeat to the Denver Broncos at the start of the 2008 season, Hanson received a five-day suspension for insubordination from Kiffin, who did not inform Davis of his action. The owner cited this as one of many reasons for Kiffin’s dismissal during a press conference last Oct. 1 to announce the firing.

Shortly after Cable was named interim coach, Hanson claims Cable told him in a staff meeting, “If I could fire you, I would.”

Following the ’08 season Cable told his assistants that he would meet with each of them to discuss their futures with the team should he be hired as the permanent coach. According to Hanson, however, Cable “met with every guy but me.”

On Jan. 20, Hanson had what he said was his first-ever “one-on-one, face-to-face meeting” with the owner. In what was supposed to be a 15-minute session to address Hanson’s prospects of remaining with the team, the coach apparently wowed the owner with his grasp of football and with his knowledge of Raiders history.

“We met for more than two-and-a-half hours,” Hanson recalled. “At the start of the meeting, he said, ‘I know you’re a hard worker and you love the Raiders, but I don’t know what you do that helps this football team. I do not know if you can coach or not.’ By the end he had given me a raise and told me he wanted me to stay on as ‘assistant coach-defense.’ My role would be to teach the new defensive coaches what we did on defense last year so they’ll know some of the things I like. He also said he wanted to groom me on the personnel side. He said he wanted me to play an important role in the future of the organization.”

At the conclusion of the meeting, Hanson was asked by Davis whether he thought Cable would be a good choice as head coach. “I told Mr. Davis yes,” Hanson recalled. “He won his last two games, and I felt like he deserved a chance.”

However, after Cable was officially hired in early February, Hanson quickly began to suspect that the head coach did not share the owner’s enthusiasm for his new role.

First Cable, at the press conference announcing his hiring, laid out his staff for reporters without mentioning Hanson. The following day, according to Hanson, Cable told him that he had just had a phone conversation with Davis in which the owner had described Hanson as a quality-control coach, a much less prestigious post with mostly administrative responsibilities.

Recalled Hanson: “Tom said, ‘Don’t worry – I’m not going to do that to you. I’ll make you a defensive assistant.’ Tom demoted me, and I became the league’s highest-paid defensive assistant.”

The slights continued over the spring. Hanson was told by Cable’s assistant not to accompany the rest of the staff to the NFL scouting combine in Indianapolis, and he ended up being given duties similar to that of a secretary. Hanson wasn’t invited to several staff functions, including a post-draft party and a trip to an Oakland A’s game.

At a post-draft minicamp for rookies and free agents, Hanson said Cable “belittled” him in the process of introducing staff members to the players by implying that he was an assistant quality-control coach.

Shortly before training camp, Davis grilled Marshall, the team’s new defensive coordinator, during a meeting. As Marshall struggled to answer a question from the owner, Hanson assisted the veteran coach by giving hand signals from the back of the room. Cable, Hanson said, seemed to have been angered by his actions.

The tension escalated early in training camp as Cable decided to split the team into two units and conduct side-by-side practices for the first four days. That meant Hanson and Washington coached on separate fields for the first eight practices, which exacerbated the coaches’ confusion over a new blitz scheme that they were trying to teach the players.

“We had changed the blitz package two or three times over a short period, and everybody was really confused and frustrated,” Hanson said. “We ended up changing it a fourth time – back to the way it was in OTAs (organized team activities) – and one of the players said in a meeting, ‘This is confusing.’ I said, ‘You guys are [f——-] right – we’re all confused, and that includes the coaches. We’ve got to get on the same page. Don’t worry. We’ll get it right.’ ”

On the evening of Aug. 4, the Raiders conducted a traditional, full-team practice in Napa that, Hanson said, “wasn’t one of our best.” After Hanson predicted that he would be blamed for the defensive problems, the other coaches told him he was being paranoid. Cable, following a 45-minute session with the defensive backs, summoned Brown, Washington and Hanson to an outside patio area and told Hanson, “They don’t want you in there.”

Cable told Hanson he wasn’t sure how he planned to remedy the situation and would get back to him in a couple of hours. Hanson then told his fellow assistants, “If The Man (Al Davis) calls you about this, tell the truth” – a statement he believes may have gotten back to Cable and increased his ire.

“If Tom knew that I had called what was going to happen, and if he thought I had talked to Mr. Davis about it, maybe he thought his cover had been blown and his plan had been thwarted,” Hanson said.

Cable never got back to Hanson that night, and the next morning he told the assistant not to come out to practice. Afterward, Hanson was summoned to a small conference room for a conversation with Cable. Hanson sat at a small rectangular table while Cable stood near the door.

Recalled Hanson: “Tom said, ‘Randy, tell me, why would these players say these things about you and not want you around them?’ I said, ‘Tom, they didn’t come to you; you went in there and created a problem. If this is true, how come I’ve never heard of this from any of the other coaches?’ He said, ‘And that’s what pisses me off – that these guys would keep this from me. I’m gonna bring ‘em in.”

At that point, Hanson said, Marshall, Washington and Brown were summoned to the room and took seats at the table. Hanson said that when questioned by Cable both Washington and Brown stuck up for his abilities.

Then, Hanson recalled, “John said, ‘Well, Tom, Randy’s been great. He knows this stuff and has been a big help for me. But I’ve been coaching for 30 years in the NFL, and when a player comes to a coach with a problem about an assistant, you’ve got to get him off the field. And I have told Randy on several occasions, ‘Don’t confuse the players.’ ”

At that point, Hanson continued, “I said, ‘John, I’m so disappointed. That’s a lie.’ From the side I heard Tom scream, ‘That’s bulls—-,’ and before I knew it Tom had blindsided me.”

Hanson said he lay on the floor, dazed, as Cable told him to “Get the f—- up.” Marshall helped him back into his chair, at which point Cable said, “I’m not gonna let you ruin my football team. If you want to be on my team, you are gonna be off the field, and you’re gonna do all the quality-control work, but you’re not to be around those f——- players. Do you accept the position?”

Recalled Hanson, “Willie was gesturing to me, ‘Just say yes,’ because he probably was worn out from pulling Tom away twice before.”

Hanson told Cable he needed time to consider the request, and Cable said, “I’ll come back to you in a couple of hours for an answer.” After going back to his room, Hanson said, he received a call from a Raiders defensive back who had heard about the incident. “He told me that what Tom said had happened in that meeting wasn’t the way it went down,” Hanson said. “It was nothing like what Tom said occurred, and several players later told me the same thing.”

“From my blindside, Tom Cable threw me from my chair and into a piece of furniture that a lamp sat upon. He was screaming, ‘I’ll f——- kill you! I’ll f——- kill you!’ And I have no reason to believe he wouldn’t have killed me if they hadn’t pulled him away.”

Not wanting news of the incident to leak and embarrassed to be seen because of his swollen face, Hanson stayed in his room until late that night, when the pain became pronounced. Early Wednesday morning Hanson went to the emergency room at Queen of the Valley hospital in Napa, where he was given X-rays. Hospital officials, as required by law, informed the Napa Police that Hanson had said he’d suffered the injury in an assault, and an officer later arrived to question him.

“I downplayed the whole thing and didn’t give them any names,” Hanson said. “The last thing I wanted was publicity. I said, ‘You know what the message is? The Raiders are back.’ ”

The next day Hanson received a call from a hospital employee telling him he had a fractured upper left jawbone; he also suffered two cracked teeth, a bruised knee and a bruised back. He returned to his home in Livermore and tried to communicate with Cable, but the coach never contacted him.

Davis had been out of town at the time of the incident – he was on the East Coast giving a deposition to a lawyer for Kiffin, who is challenging the owner’s decision not to pay him the balance of his contract. He did not meet with Hanson until Aug. 16, 11 days after the incident.

At that meeting, Hanson said, Davis told him he’d be a distraction to the team if he were allowed to return to his former role and that such a move would be seen as Davis undermining his head coach. Davis gave Hanson three choices: Move over to the personnel side; accept Cable’s proposal to perform quality-control duties while staying away from the players; or receive the balance of his contract (which runs through the 2010 season) without returning to the organization.

“You’re Tuck-Ruling me,” Hanson told Davis, comparing the perceived injustice to the controversial replay reversal that cost the Raiders a victory over the New England Patriots in the 2001 playoffs.

Yet despite his frustration, Hanson has remained loyal to the organization. Late last month McGuinn, his attorney, told NFL.com that several Raiders players had solicited Hanson’s input about upcoming opponents, with one even giving him a team laptop that used to belong to Brown. “Al Davis doesn’t know [Hanson has] been providing detailed coaching for these guys, and Randy has not gotten any credit for it,” McGuinn told the league’s website.

A source said one Raiders assistant has also reached out to Hanson in recent weeks. Hanson declined to comment about any help he might have provided to players or others in the organization since he was barred from visiting the team’s facility.

After holding out for more than seven weeks, Hanson finally gave a 90-minute interview to Napa Police detective Mike Walund on Sept. 26 during which he turned over medical records. While Hanson is not sure what will happen next – “That’s in the police’s hands,” he said – he can’t help but root for the Raiders on Sundays.

“I watch every game,” Hanson said. “I want them to win. Once a Raider, always a Raider.”

Asked whether he plans to sue Cable and/or the organization, Hanson said, “I wish this had never happened. I was hoping it wouldn’t get to this point. But sometimes you’ve got to be a Raider, too. I mean, if he were in my situation, what would Mr. Davis do?”

all yoga attacks are fire based (rogermexico.), Sunday, 11 October 2009 19:46 (fifteen years ago)

jesus fucking christ

kushighway (J0rdan S.), Sunday, 11 October 2009 19:48 (fifteen years ago)


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