This is the thread where S- liveblogs Australia's terrible World Cup 2022 video bid

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Or 'I'm so fucking ashamed to be Australian right now'

So we're all on the same page:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ogzjfJtg3TA

0.03 - Kangaroo appears. Looks far less convincing than http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0257568/

0.07 - Kangaroo puts the World Cup in its pouch. Going to have to assume it's a female 'roo then

0.21 - The leader of our country demonstrates she's completely unable to pronounce difficult words like "Yes"

0.30 - I'm voting Liberal next election. Say what you will about Howard, he'd never appear in something like this, would he?

0.31 - Apple product placement

0.37 - Got any blacker?

0.42 - Skateboarding for some reason

0.45 - Ian Thorpe as a lifesaver. Pretty sure he only swims in pools. Also a missed opportunity not to be more Australian and get Billy Thorpe

0.47 - Non-white people spotted. Not Maroubra then

For a long time nothing of interest happens. People act as you'd expect they would when confronted with a poorly animated CGI antropomorphic kangaroo; by taking lots of pictures on their phone

1.39 - Wasn't a bit of Mad Max shot here? for srs, the bit where Mel plays chicken with the Nightrider

1.48 - Cathy Freeman appears to be jogging all 14,000+ kilometres of http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Highway_1_%28Australia%29

1.53 - The kangaroo is unable to keep up with her. To be fair, it did just surf all the way from Switzerland

2.00 - Tourists should get used to the sight of roadkill on country roads

2.17 - Kangaroos often portray lemming-like tendencies

2.22 - Underwater levels from Donkey Kong Country

2.38 - Not content with having stolen the real World Cup, the 'roo pursues a bunch of fish that look a bit like the World Cup. I think this is a problem that should be sorted out with a psychologist

3.00 - Sydney is full of wankers

3.05 - Blue shirted wankers

3.09 - Everything in Australia is really fucking close to everything else! The coast, the outback, Sydney, Melbourne, really this country is the size of Lichtenstein!

3.12 - We have a stadium! It's big!

3.15 - Obviously all actors - no one's wearing black

3.23 - It's illegal to ride motorcycles on that part of Swanston street

3.26 - Realistic portayal of Melbourne CBD populace. Everyone is asian or a blonde lady.

3.28 - Red and green lights traffic lights do not occupy the same position. Also it's the World Cup for some reason

3.33 - Jaywalking. Surprised the police didn't pick that up, considering while this was happening http://news.ninemsn.com.au/national/1073638/gunman-on-the-loose-in-melbourne some 200 people got fined for it. Priorities

3.38 - Melbourne: Australia's Capital of Shit Public Art

3.40 - Man riding a bike share bicycle without a helmet. Illegal - http://www.theage.com.au/victoria/helmet-law-hurting-shared-bike-scheme-20101128-18cf2.html

3.42 - Motorcycling on the footpath! If tourists do everything in this video there's going to be some serious fucking jailtime

3.47 - I can tell this is the Docklands because it's completely fucking deserted. That and the terrible architecture

3.52 - aaaand a quick cut to somewhere about two and half thousand kilometres away

4.00 - WHITE PEOPLE AND BLACK PEOPLE AND MUSLIM PEOPLE AND ASIAN PEOPLE ALL PLAYING SOCCER. IN THE OUTBACK. IN FRONT OF AYERS ROCK.

4.03 - And they seem to have all got there in the one ute. Must be a Ford

4.10 - Poor Asian guy can't see the ball

4.12 - Possibly because too much hair product got in his eyes while he was cosplaying as a Dragonball Z character

4.28 - Everyone celebrates theft. Nation of convicts indeed

4.45 - Is that stadium in Sydney? It can't be the NEW PURPOSE BUILT SOCCER STADIUM IN MELBOURNE BECAUSE THAT'S TOO FUCKING SMALL FOR FIFA REGULATIONS http://www.adelaidenow.com.au/melbournes-new-rectangular-stadium-is-too-small-to-host-world-cup-matches/story-e6frf4l3-1225771447567

5.00 - One guy on a motorbike. Another poor half-time show. Still better than Angry Anderson with the Batmobile

5.04 - Australia loses World Cup. Again

5.10 - Lonely 'roo, thinking baout things

5.27 - AND IT'S PAUL HOGAN. Was Mel Gibson unavailable?

5.33 - Obviously the ATO gave him the option: Go to jail, or do this. Shoulda chosen prison

5.37 - Where did he keep the hat while motorcycling around the entire country?

5.45 - Some more didge. Fin

6.00 - Def. voting Libs

Verdict: I'd rather people associate Australia with Ivan Milat than this video. Still better than the movie Australia though.

The Jolly Roget's Thesaurus (S-), Thursday, 2 December 2010 04:01 (fourteen years ago)

ahahahaha

casual poon (electricsound), Thursday, 2 December 2010 04:09 (fourteen years ago)

Fucking Paul Hogan. That's exactly like if America rolled out Steve Guttenberg in its bid video.

aa (Schlafsack), Thursday, 2 December 2010 05:14 (fourteen years ago)

Sash will u marry me.

Frank Lloyd Webber (Trayce), Thursday, 2 December 2010 05:53 (fourteen years ago)

Yeah, Kangaroos are associated with losers in Australian sport iirc.

Culture: only gays have it (King Boy Pato), Thursday, 2 December 2010 06:37 (fourteen years ago)

Brilliant!

buildings with goats on the roof (James Morrison), Thursday, 2 December 2010 22:41 (fourteen years ago)

Roxy4217 has replied to your comment on Australia World Cup 2022 Bid presentation Video to Fifa (Kangaroo):

@GenNuisance Your the living proof the Crystel Meth is a bad drug. Shut up clown.

The Jolly Roget's Thesaurus (S-), Friday, 3 December 2010 01:01 (fourteen years ago)

the Crystel Meth.

They were a shit band.

Frank Lloyd Webber (Trayce), Friday, 3 December 2010 01:50 (fourteen years ago)

omg i just actually *watched* this thing and I would like my sanity back pls. Jesus fuck.

Frank Lloyd Webber (Trayce), Saturday, 4 December 2010 06:00 (fourteen years ago)


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