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Okay...I come here to participate on the forums, I post the questions on the right board...for example..my sex question, on the sex board, hair question on the hair board....and yet, I get totally scrutinized for posting, I felt like shit to begin with,I came on here to perhaps start a few online friendships,You know, like something to look foward to, when I have nothing at all in life to look foward to, as it seems and yet all I have received so far is the most unwelcome of unwelcomes...I am going to take myself off of here and maybe go on some other site, where I will be welcomed, and treated right...But to be honest, I have lost faith in any BB sites.....Sorry for not fitting in...maybe in another lifetime...

― becky lucas (becky_lucas), Tuesday, 28 January 2003 01:16 (twenty-two years ago)

hair board?

― jess (dubplatestyle), Tuesday, 28 January 2003 01:22 (twenty-two years ago)

Hey Becky, welcome here, hopefully you won't leave. I think the biggest reason for the reaction is that your debut (I think it was the first anyhow) question seemed maybe...extreme for a first question. We seem to have a lot of people coming in here trolling, so most people are wary of questions like that that seem to cut straight to the chase. I mean, you even flustered Dan "Inappropriate" Perry, which is saying something! Anyhow, stick around and ask questions, comment, etc. Like any community, you'll be welcomed, but you might need to take a bit of time...a good number of us know each other from a ways back, but there are always new people coming onto ILE/ILM.

― Sean Carruthers (SeanC), Tuesday, 28 January 2003 01:26 (twenty-two years ago)

I don't know, Becky. I answered your question as straightforwardly as possible, and you had a go at me.

This is really not a place for being overly defensive. That rubs people the wrong way. That's my observation, take it as you like.

― kate, Tuesday, 28 January 2003 01:28 (twenty-two years ago)

Translation: "Fuck off newbie". I've come across the same obnoxious attitudes on the ILM board. i can't praise toploader without falling victim to nasty personal attacks.

― andy paltridge (andy), Tuesday, 28 January 2003 01:32 (twenty-two years ago)

actually i don't think anyone was saying "fuck off newbie" to becky (well RJG was, but he was either joking or didn't believe becky wz who she said she was - no one else wz at all)

andy which threads are you talking abt on ilm? ilm is so huge now that it's hard to know which faction is eating chunks out of which other faction

― mark s (mark s), Tuesday, 28 January 2003 01:36 (twenty-two years ago)

Sex questions bring out people's tendencies to be silly and sarcastic and ridiculous. It's just part of the territory so you have to be prepared for a lot of joking responses when you ask an explicit sex question; it's not all personal insults.

Another thing is that there is no specific "sex" or "hair" forum you can go into. You pick categories for your questions to get filed into after they become old (and probably inactive), but initially when your question appears, it's part of the general forum. So it shares the same space and the same readers as questions about politics and music and whatnot.

― Maria (Maria), Tuesday, 28 January 2003 01:37 (twenty-two years ago)

"actually i don't think anyone was saying "fuck off newbie" to becky"

Then how would YOU interpret THIS remark?

"That rubs people the wrong way. That's my observation, take it as you like."

I'm all ears, mark...

― andy paltridge (andy), Tuesday, 28 January 2003 01:44 (twenty-two years ago)

that's constructive criticism. 'Fuck off newbie' is just that, you paranoid freakshow.

― Millar (Millar), Tuesday, 28 January 2003 01:46 (twenty-two years ago)

"you paranoid freakshow."

Et voila! Another poster giving me a warm welcome. First I'm dismissed for (correctly) extolling the merits of toploader, now THIS!

― andy paltridge (andy), Tuesday, 28 January 2003 01:49 (twenty-two years ago)

Ask an honest question, get an honest answer, and SOMEONE will always have a problem with it.

I don't like people - whether they've been on the board for two days or two years - sniping at me and implying nastiness when I give an honest answer on a thread. Am I still being "fuck off newbie" when I tell Marcello to stop being aggressively defensive?

If you ask a question like "Why does no one liiiiiiiike me???" you can't be offended when someone actually replies.

I haven't actually been on a lot of Becky's threads because I haven't been here. I just said what it was specifically that she did that rubbed *me* the wrong way. If you want to read that as "fuck off newbie" that's your overly defensive paranoia, not my inferral.

― kate, Tuesday, 28 January 2003 01:50 (twenty-two years ago)

Becky started a thread asking a question about buttsex. Kate answered it at length, very seriously and frankly. Becky responded as if Kate was taking the piss in some way, which she plainly wasn't.

Now Kate here says, "If you're going to be as super-defensive as THAT, Becky, then you're not going to enjoy it here." This seems to me to be a perfectly reasonable thing to say: if Becky is going to take offense even when people take the trouble to answer honestly and openly the exact questions she asks, then chances are she's not going to get much out of ILE.

― mark s (mark s), Tuesday, 28 January 2003 01:52 (twenty-two years ago)

More reasons why Mark S is the Smartest Man In The World...

― kate, Tuesday, 28 January 2003 01:53 (twenty-two years ago)

andy it probably helps actually being able to read

― mark s (mark s), Tuesday, 28 January 2003 01:53 (twenty-two years ago)

i just emailed becky to say stick around anyway

― mark s (mark s), Tuesday, 28 January 2003 01:54 (twenty-two years ago)

on the other thread someone suggested we rename "magic hotel" as "cockfarmer's jubilee". what's your clever explanation for THAT?!

I'm all ears...

― andy paltridge (andy), Tuesday, 28 January 2003 01:54 (twenty-two years ago)

hehehe

― electric sound of jim (electricsound), Tuesday, 28 January 2003 01:55 (twenty-two years ago)

L3nNy 8rUc3 54iD i7 8357

― Millar (Millar), Tuesday, 28 January 2003 01:56 (twenty-two years ago)

I always wanted to do that

― Millar (Millar), Tuesday, 28 January 2003 01:56 (twenty-two years ago)

possible clever explanation: that it is not their favourite song?

― mark s (mark s), Tuesday, 28 January 2003 01:57 (twenty-two years ago)

you can do 'i's as '1' as well

― electric sound of jim (electricsound), Tuesday, 28 January 2003 01:57 (twenty-two years ago)

or as '!' like p!nk

― mark s (mark s), Tuesday, 28 January 2003 01:59 (twenty-two years ago)

Andy, if you can't stand to have your opinions contradicted in public, you're probably better off not expressing them in the first place.

Cockfarmer's Jubilee, bwah hah hah. That's priceless. The clever explanation is "that's funny as fuck!"

― kate, Tuesday, 28 January 2003 02:00 (twenty-two years ago)

"possible clever explanation: that it is not their favourite song?"

Why don't you just post: "We don't want you here. Your taste in music isn't cool enough." I know that's what you mean.

― andy paltridge (andy), Tuesday, 28 January 2003 02:01 (twenty-two years ago)

you'll not get far, here or in life, demanding people respect your pain.

particularly as a whiny toploader fan.

― Andrew Farrell (afarrell), Tuesday, 28 January 2003 02:01 (twenty-two years ago)

Your taste in music isn't cool enough.

that could apply to anyone here, to someone else. point is, who cares? cool? give a toss.

― electric sound of jim (electricsound), Tuesday, 28 January 2003 02:02 (twenty-two years ago)

Look at all these hypercritical bastards telling me how to type in the proper 1337 fashion. Do I interpret their comments as 'fuck off newbie?' No. I think they are secretly saying 'fuck off conservative-minded warmonger.' But I don't let it bother me.

― Millar (Millar), Tuesday, 28 January 2003 02:03 (twenty-two years ago)

Maybe Becky misinterpeted the meaning behind 'Any fat fourty year old men who have got their jollies from this post may leave the room now.' She might have thought it was targetting her specifically.
That's my guess. Unless it was and I've misinterpeted.

― fractal (fractal), Tuesday, 28 January 2003 02:04 (twenty-two years ago)

man, I think Andy's Universal Translator is malfunctioning, cause those leaps of logic and inferral are truly mind-boggling.

― kate, Tuesday, 28 January 2003 02:04 (twenty-two years ago)

(goes off and reads

― Andrew Farrell (afarrell), Tuesday, 28 January 2003 02:05 (twenty-two years ago)

(goes off and reads Toploader thread)

I take it back, you're quite a gifted troll.

"I suppose you pride yourself on your knowledge of music, yet have scant knowledge of Toploader." = classic.

― Andrew Farrell (afarrell), Tuesday, 28 January 2003 02:05 (twenty-two years ago)

Really, Andy, why do you give a flying fuck what a board full of random strangers think of you? If you have something to say (worthwhile or not), say it; if you want an opinion, ask a question, and if you don't get the response you were looking for, who's gotten hurt? No one is going to agree with everything you say, every opinion you offer - welcome to the real world.

― luna (luna.c), Tuesday, 28 January 2003 02:07 (twenty-two years ago)

andy. there is a band that i like a lot. i said i liked them on here. most people disagreed. some openly laughed. i learned to deal with it.

the same thing happened in the pub also, my friend said "adorable! you like adorable, hahaha". i learned to deal with it.

whatever you say in life is open to criticism. if you dont like people criticizing anything you say. dont say anything. or partake in discussion, conversation, life, and dont take it too harsh if people like something different to you, or think what you like is shit.

― gareth (gareth), Tuesday, 28 January 2003 02:08 (twenty-two years ago)

"particularly as a whiny toploader fan."
--
"Your taste in music isn't cool enough. that could apply to anyone here, to someone else. point is, who cares? cool? give a toss."

"man, I think Andy's Universal Translator is malfunctioning, cause those leaps of logic and inferral are truly mind-boggling."

Translation: "Go away! We don't want you here! We would prefer a board that supports our smug anti-Toploader beliefs!"

― andy paltridge (andy), Tuesday, 28 January 2003 02:08 (twenty-two years ago)

you asked a question, i answered it seriously, you took offence at nothing (or rather at what you "know i meant")

there are people on ilm who don't like toploader who like to tease people who do: i have terrible taste in music, as half ilm knows — so what? chill out dude

― mark s (mark s), Tuesday, 28 January 2003 02:08 (twenty-two years ago)

like i said, it helps if you can actually read, andy: none of those things translate as fuck off, especially gareth's

― mark s (mark s), Tuesday, 28 January 2003 02:10 (twenty-two years ago)

now personally andy i do want you here.

but, i would rather you tried to persuade me what it is about toploader that is so good. you might suceed, you mighjt not, but im interested in your opinion anyway.

but is calling me an elitist cunt becuase i dont like one particular band going to do this trick? its possible, but youll have your work cut out.

you have a viewpoints. either argue them, or throw a strop and tell people they're wrong because they have like a different band.

― gareth (gareth), Tuesday, 28 January 2003 02:10 (twenty-two years ago)

and as for becky, well, becky is hella cool!

― gareth (gareth), Tuesday, 28 January 2003 02:11 (twenty-two years ago)

the main reason i have stuck around is cos people on ilm DON'T have 'cool' taste in music.

― minna (minna), Tuesday, 28 January 2003 02:11 (twenty-two years ago)

Could people go and read the Toploader thread before responding to andy any more? I think he covers most of what you need in there.

― Andrew Farrell (afarrell), Tuesday, 28 January 2003 02:12 (twenty-two years ago)

"i would rather you tried to persuade me what it is about toploader that is so good. you might suceed, you mighjt not, but im interested in your opinion anyway."

I've already attempted to start a toploader discussion, and was treated with boorish contempt. I am leaving with my head held high and (unlike you lot), my dignity intact!

Laters, losers.

― andy paltridge (andy), Tuesday, 28 January 2003 02:14 (twenty-two years ago)

If Andy is actually being serious and not having a smug laugh at us at the moment then I'd be rather surprised. I imagine that he's actually a more gifted troll than even Farrell suggests.

Congrats Andy, you are highly skilled at the most useless form of manipulation invented.

― Millar (Millar), Tuesday, 28 January 2003 02:14 (twenty-two years ago)

More of these translations, please, Andy, they're intensely amusing. If I say, "Aw, Hilton is so amazing, he's so talented and so beautiful" are you going to tell me that means "Fuck off newbie, I hate Toploader" as well?

This is fun!

― kate, Tuesday, 28 January 2003 02:15 (twenty-two years ago)

these 'discussions' always end the same way. I don't understand why we're trying to justify ourselves to someone who had made up their minds before we'd said a word?

― electric sound of jim (electricsound), Tuesday, 28 January 2003 02:15 (twenty-two years ago)

Oh, right, read that last one of andy's. Someone give that man an oscar.

― Millar (Millar), Tuesday, 28 January 2003 02:16 (twenty-two years ago)

he only said that people were wanking by their computers. im sure he didnt mean that nastily, was just joking i expect./

and losers is just a term of endearment i would have thought?

itll be a shame if you do go andy, but i'll borrow the album from the library anyway and give it another go. cheers!

― gareth (gareth), Tuesday, 28 January 2003 02:16 (twenty-two years ago)

I have no idea who or what a toploader is.

seems to be a lot of defenisve babies on here lately though. bah.

― That Girl (thatgirl), Tuesday, 28 January 2003 02:17 (twenty-two years ago)

the other thing that is quite amusiong about the questions about who is real and who is made up, is that all of you have assumed that I am real! didnt you consider that i might have been made up as a device to while away the small hours?

― gareth (gareth), Tuesday, 28 January 2003 02:20 (twenty-two years ago)

I knew it!
Gareth is really a forty year old fat horny bastard!

j/k

― Sarah McLusky (coco), Tuesday, 28 January 2003 02:23 (twenty-two years ago)

i don't generally like to think that poorly of people

― electric sound of jim (electricsound), Tuesday, 28 January 2003 02:24 (twenty-two years ago)

I take everyone at face value these days. Even (especially?) Doomie. What scares me is that Doomie posted on one of my threads and I didn't even realise that he was being incognito! Sure, it was hard giving up that aspect of paranoia, but you know, better to free one innocent person than to flame ten guilty people. Or, erm, something. It's late and I don't know what I'm talking about... except Toploader still being rubbish and Hilton still being lovely.

― kate, Tuesday, 28 January 2003 02:25 (twenty-two years ago)

seems to be a lot of defenisve babies on here lately though. bah.
Are you talking about ME? You're talking about ME, aren't you? I knew it! You're telling me to fuck off! I'm taking my keyboard and GOING HOME.

Oh, wait, I am home. Never mind.

― Sean Carruthers (SeanC), Tuesday, 28 January 2003 02:25 (twenty-two years ago)

i don't know how to take Doomie anymore. I started really liking him (or his persona) and he blew it to a million bits just with one thread.

― electric sound of jim (electricsound), Tuesday, 28 January 2003 02:28 (twenty-two years ago)

With Doomie, you really have to bear in mind that you are not reading the whole story, and you are not aware of everything else going on in his life. Just because someone has trolling tendencies does not mean that they are not a human being, and that they don't have bad days, and things that affect them and unsettle them on a personal level. I'm not saying that excuses bad behaviour, but it does explain and somewhat mitigate it.

― kate, Tuesday, 28 January 2003 02:31 (twenty-two years ago)

I could tell you where to stick yer keyboard but i think that post belongs on another thread. . .

― That Girl (thatgirl), Tuesday, 28 January 2003 02:32 (twenty-two years ago)

Everyone stop telling me to fuck off!

*sobs loudly*

But seriously, folks. More luv for cats, ok? Pepper keeps trying to get in my lap but that's where the keyboard is (what? I'm on ILX from home?? Is this the end of the world?)...

― Sarah McLusky (coco), Tuesday, 28 January 2003 02:32 (twenty-two years ago)

but that means everyones behaviour is mitigated, because you dont know the full story of anyone

― gareth (gareth), Tuesday, 28 January 2003 02:33 (twenty-two years ago)

There are probably a lot of fat, 40 year old lurkers on ILE that are feeling like shit right about now.

― nickn (nickn), Tuesday, 28 January 2003 02:33 (twenty-two years ago)

Even more seriously, I think it's ILX's time of the month or something.

― Sarah McLusky (coco), Tuesday, 28 January 2003 02:33 (twenty-two years ago)

one of my kitties is purring in my lap at the moment.

ohh!! this weekend i met a 32 pound cat. he was sweet but incredibly freakish.

― That Girl (thatgirl), Tuesday, 28 January 2003 02:34 (twenty-two years ago)

Gareth - Yup. That means exactly that. We could all stand to remember that occasionally.

― kate, Tuesday, 28 January 2003 02:34 (twenty-two years ago)

Sorry, no offense to fat 40-year old male lurkers.

― Sarah McLusky (coco), Tuesday, 28 January 2003 02:35 (twenty-two years ago)

in other words kate...treat eveyone fairly...but till what point? the point where you treat friends the same way as people you have no respect for? at what point does it run out? especially if there was nothing built up in the first place to run out?

― gareth (gareth), Tuesday, 28 January 2003 02:36 (twenty-two years ago)

indeed. people who are nice until they have another one of their 'bad days'.. i just wish it was easier to ignore them than I let it be.

― electric sound of jim (electricsound), Tuesday, 28 January 2003 02:38 (twenty-two years ago)

"particularly as a whiny toploader fan."
--
"Your taste in music isn't cool enough. that could apply to anyone here, to someone else. point is, who cares? cool? give a toss."

"man, I think Andy's Universal Translator is malfunctioning, cause those leaps of logic and inferral are truly mind-boggling."

Translation:

"en particulier comme ventilateur whiny de toploader."
--
"votre goût dans la musique n'est pas frais assez qui pourrait s'appliquer à n'importe qui ici, à quelqu'un le point que d'autre est, qui s'inquiète? frais? donnez un jet en l'air."

"homme, je pense le traducteur universel d'Andy fonctionne mal, cause ces sauts de la logique et inferral soyez vraiment époustouflant."

― Paul in Santa Cruz (Paul in Santa Cruz), Tuesday, 28 January 2003 02:38 (twenty-two years ago)

The second half of the above post needs to be spoken by a sexy lady, sampled, and immediately turned into a bacharach-style lounger

― Millar (Millar), Tuesday, 28 January 2003 02:47 (twenty-two years ago)

Amen to that!

― Paul in Santa Cruz (Paul in Santa Cruz), Tuesday, 28 January 2003 03:07 (twenty-two years ago)

I never knew ILx0rs were so cruel :(

Who IS Toploader, btw?

― Curtis Stephens, Tuesday, 28 January 2003 03:18 (twenty-two years ago)

Noel Gallagher side-project

― electric sound of jim (electricsound), Tuesday, 28 January 2003 03:19 (twenty-two years ago)

Actually, Millar, I think he has you fooled he's pulling the old manipulation invented TWICE trick.

Stop calling me defensive, I'm not defensive!

― A Nairn (moretap), Tuesday, 28 January 2003 03:30 (twenty-two years ago)

"i don't know how to take Doomie anymore. I started really liking him (or his persona) and he blew it to a million bits just with one thread"

Wait, what thread is that?

(Hey, has anyone gone to meet someone for the first time at a FAP and they turned out to be a 40 year old fat guy?)

― A Nairn (moretap), Tuesday, 28 January 2003 03:36 (twenty-two years ago)

the 'how can i make my wife like music again' thread.

― electric sound of jim (electricsound), Tuesday, 28 January 2003 03:41 (twenty-two years ago)

FOR SARAH
http://www.choppersbar.com/bsr/glowcat.gif
raver cat

― chaki (chaki), Tuesday, 28 January 2003 03:44 (twenty-two years ago)

that is awesome.

― That Girl (thatgirl), Tuesday, 28 January 2003 04:04 (twenty-two years ago)

Was that cat crossbred with a Dachshund?

― David R. (popshots75`), Tuesday, 28 January 2003 04:05 (twenty-two years ago)

For the record:

1. I don't believe that "Becky" (or, as I have come to think of that poster, Grandpa Avril) is a teenage girl. I think that the teenage girl persona is being used to trawl for cybersex partners. "Forty-year-old fat married guy" was a joke, but I still think that Grandpa Avril is a guy.

2. I think that this is funny, rather than annoying or upsetting, and I find the utter cluelessness of Grandpa Avril's insults (oh no! I have a funny first name! oh NO!) funny, pathetic, and not upsetting.

3. I did, in fact, tell Grandpa Avril to "leave us alone", but mean the poster no ill will.

― Colin Meeder (Mert), Tuesday, 28 January 2003 09:42 (twenty-two years ago)

I think Becky is OK. it would be funny if she was a 40-year old man.

as for andy: it would be interesting if someone came out and defended toploader. but he didn't bother...a few negative ans and it was the tired line: 'We have NME readers here'! If you are not going to even try and argue it out then don't bother.

(I thought andy was marcello actually)

― Julio Desouza (jdesouza), Tuesday, 28 January 2003 09:56 (twenty-two years ago)

I LOVE THE RAVER CAT!!! WHERE CAN I GET ONE?!?!

― M Matos (M Matos), Tuesday, 28 January 2003 09:57 (twenty-two years ago)

Right click, then Save Picture As!

Toploader washing machines. I'd defend *them*.

― MarkH (MarkH), Tuesday, 28 January 2003 10:08 (twenty-two years ago)

kate having a go at me doesn't bother me because i know kate now and know that she's usually right to do so, as well she knows too.

but reading this thread, and the subtext behind it, coupled with other similar recent threads on ile, has made me angry. any of this, if spoken in a pub, would have ended in a punch-up. and you might think it's fun but it's depressing to read.

sort yourselves out, all of you, me included.

― Marcello Carlin, Tuesday, 28 January 2003 10:11 (twenty-two years ago)

any of this, if spoken in a pub, would have ended in a punch-up.

to be honest, this could be said about an alarming amount of what gets posted on both ILE and ILM. Never seems to stop anyone really. I try and stop short of getting nasty but sometimes even I forget to check myself, because it's so damn easy, and because it feels like everybody's doing it (and nobody should be)..

― electric sound of jim (electricsound), Tuesday, 28 January 2003 10:25 (twenty-two years ago)

I think people on ILX should be polite and I regret the times I haven't been, in general. But the Internet isn't a pub and shouldn't be judged according to the same standards - for one thing discussion boards mean large-group interaction not small-group, which increases the chances of insensitivity but also increases the likelihood of self-policing and the group turns on a rogue member; in small groups the lack of this policing means one-on-one confrontations ("punch-ups"
) are more likely.

― Tom (Groke), Tuesday, 28 January 2003 10:35 (twenty-two years ago)

"and" = "as"

Conversely the large-group set up increases the opportunity for group support and finding sympathetic ears - also in a pub none of the people who've anonymously asked for advice here would be able to do so, would they?

― Tom (Groke), Tuesday, 28 January 2003 10:37 (twenty-two years ago)

Moreover, I cannot imagine a pub with this particular combination of people in it, and in a pub, you've got a bit more choice as to whom you stand next to.

― Colin Meeder (Mert), Tuesday, 28 January 2003 10:51 (twenty-two years ago)

it's another example for pete's analogies thread!

― toby (tsg20), Tuesday, 28 January 2003 11:13 (twenty-two years ago)

You are all internet mentalists and exist only within the space between my head and the CPU. If I log out you will all vanish.

But seriously there is no inflection in text. Conversation in text is hampered by the lack of facial expression, inflection, tone etc. All we can do is take what's presented to us at face value and just relax.

― Ed (dali), Tuesday, 28 January 2003 11:35 (twenty-two years ago)

just out of interest, did we ever get any further with the "killfile" idea or was it thought to do more harm than good?

― Marcello Carlin, Tuesday, 28 January 2003 11:39 (twenty-two years ago)

what was the killfile idea?

― Ed (dali), Tuesday, 28 January 2003 11:44 (twenty-two years ago)

It allows people to choose who they don't want to see posts from. It was judged a really bad idea. Graham implmented it immediately :)

― Andrew Farrell (afarrell), Tuesday, 28 January 2003 11:47 (twenty-two years ago)

that just seems bizarre to me, but then so does taking what some internet mentalist says personally.

― Ed (dali), Tuesday, 28 January 2003 11:50 (twenty-two years ago)

There were a couple of different ideas -- a "killfile" would allow, for example, Marcello to avoid seeing any of my posts in a thread -- this was generally considered a bad idea as this is a bullitin board, not a mailing list, and the ability to personally select which posters one reads would lead to increased incoherency, and moreover make it nearly impossible to tell if you're responding to the same thread as the person you're talking to. There was also the idea of URL banning, in which certain posters who have gone completely beyond the pale (in terms of spam, offensiveness, or something else) have their net addresses blocked so that they can't post, regardless of what login name (if any) they use. This conversation never went too far, but I don't think that it was completely vetoed.

― Colin Meeder (Mert), Tuesday, 28 January 2003 11:50 (twenty-two years ago)

it's just that, based on ile generally today and yesterday, i'm inclined to want to request killfiles on nearly every poster.

― Marcello Carlin, Tuesday, 28 January 2003 11:54 (twenty-two years ago)

It might be easier if you left, though. Not that I want you to.

― Andrew Thames (Andrew Thames), Tuesday, 28 January 2003 11:56 (twenty-two years ago)

That second post was a pretty obvious punchline.

― Ronan (Ronan), Tuesday, 28 January 2003 12:01 (twenty-two years ago)

Killfiling has been ruled out. IP banning hasn't.

― Tom (Groke), Tuesday, 28 January 2003 12:03 (twenty-two years ago)

Ronan, it was meant to be. Don't really know why I bothered, though.

― Andrew Thames (Andrew Thames), Tuesday, 28 January 2003 12:04 (twenty-two years ago)

(Tom, re: IP banning, I don't think I'll ever make a neat web interface thing for it, but if there's ever anyone you want banned, you can ask)

― Graham (graham), Tuesday, 28 January 2003 12:08 (twenty-two years ago)

(Thanks Graham - I doubt to be honest there will be but you never know.)

― Tom (Groke), Tuesday, 28 January 2003 12:10 (twenty-two years ago)

oh, so I just translated gareth's 'ATTENTION RJG' thread.

: (

― RJG (RJG), Tuesday, 28 January 2003 12:13 (twenty-two years ago)

it's just that, based on ile generally today and yesterday, i'm inclined to want to request killfiles on nearly every poster.

I think that's a good reason for not having them.

― Andrew Farrell (afarrell), Tuesday, 28 January 2003 12:24 (twenty-two years ago)

that toploader thread was pretty crazy. but was it real?

― Alan (Alan), Tuesday, 28 January 2003 13:27 (twenty-two years ago)

no banning and no killfile please.

― Julio Desouza (jdesouza), Tuesday, 28 January 2003 13:29 (twenty-two years ago)

I second that motion.

Also, I second that emotion.

Great raver cat, chaki. Is he on E? He's been dancing for a really long time...

― Sarah McLusky (coco), Tuesday, 28 January 2003 13:36 (twenty-two years ago)

Re. banning - any banning that happens will be publically announced. I'll also say - to illustrate how sparingly it would be used - that in over 2 1/2 years of ILX I don't think there's been a single instance when I would actually have used it.

― Tom (Groke), Tuesday, 28 January 2003 13:41 (twenty-two years ago)

(Andrew I didn't mean you by any means)

― Ronan (Ronan), Tuesday, 28 January 2003 13:45 (twenty-two years ago)

andy paltridge reminds me of me when I arrived. Only Toploader are actually worse than Embrace. And I swore more. And never mentioned NME. I'd like to think I've become a slightly more productive member of the forum in the interveening (sic) 18 months or so. Maybe andy can too.

― Nick Southall (Nick Southall), Tuesday, 28 January 2003 13:56 (twenty-two years ago)

Yeah Andy P reminds me of other posters too.

― Tom (Groke), Tuesday, 28 January 2003 13:57 (twenty-two years ago)

Maybe there are kind of standard templates of new users in terms of how they react and what they expect of the place? Like "oh no, here's another shouter who's not lurked before he's typed" kind of thing?

― Nick Southall (Nick Southall), Tuesday, 28 January 2003 14:01 (twenty-two years ago)

is there something Tom isn't telling us?

― Alan (Alan), Tuesday, 28 January 2003 14:02 (twenty-two years ago)

Lurking would probably help people get an idea of what to expect in a place like this, but it's not like people listen to this kind of advice.

― Nicole (Nicole), Tuesday, 28 January 2003 14:02 (twenty-two years ago)

I wish I'd lurked. Everyone thinks I'm a twat now!

― Nick Southall (Nick Southall), Tuesday, 28 January 2003 14:07 (twenty-two years ago)

New users are great btw and I don't think a typology of them would help at all.

― Tom (Groke), Tuesday, 28 January 2003 14:09 (twenty-two years ago)

yes, i just threw myself straight into posting when i found this place about a year ago. i wish now that i'd lurked for a while, Im a bit embarrassed by some of my early posts. At least, i should have posted more sparingly.

― weasel diesel (K1l14n), Tuesday, 28 January 2003 14:10 (twenty-two years ago)

how can i get my wife to start liking music again?

― Chris V. (Chris V), Tuesday, 28 January 2003 14:12 (twenty-two years ago)

Blind her.

― Nick Southall (Nick Southall), Tuesday, 28 January 2003 14:12 (twenty-two years ago)

Everybody forgets the silly stuff that people write when they first start posting, I wouldn't worry about it.

― Nicole (Nicole), Tuesday, 28 January 2003 14:45 (twenty-two years ago)

Yeah Andy P reminds me of other posters too.

That "it is only silly Rock critics who do not like Muse!" guy to thread.

― Daniel_Rf (Daniel_Rf), Tuesday, 28 January 2003 14:57 (twenty-two years ago)

I lurked for quite a bit of time before finally daring to post. ANd now look at me! mwah hah hah! I thought of the greatest thing to say about this thread while I was on my walk, but of course, Sugar Sugar by the Archies wiped ALL thoughts from my head.

The tone of this board, and especially ILM, can be quite intimidating. However, one thing that newbies generally don't know (unless they've been lurking) is that people don't say "fuck off, yer taste is shite!" to people just because they're newbies, they say it because they disagree with their tastes. The ability to take this sort of attitude comes with time and knowing people, sure. But it's Hate The Opinion, Not The Poster around here. Which makes it a *lot* friendlier to new people than many places I've been.

Anyway...

― kate, Tuesday, 28 January 2003 15:03 (twenty-two years ago)

kate is OTM

I'm not saying ILX is perfect though, I've noticed a lot of 'dumb' threads being created lately, more than usual anyway. I just try and answer stuff that I hope will be of help.

― Fuzzy (Fuzzy), Tuesday, 28 January 2003 15:14 (twenty-two years ago)

that toploader thread was pretty crazy. but was it real?

Missed it first time and only just read it now. No way on earth is mr paltridge real. And as someone inferred, the clue's in the name.

― James Ball (James Ball), Tuesday, 28 January 2003 15:27 (twenty-two years ago)

Fuzzy, What's a dumb thread?

I didn't lurk at all. I just started posting like mad about my underwear collection. Just dove right in. Didn't realize then how involved I'd become.

― Sarah McLusky (coco), Tuesday, 28 January 2003 19:42 (twenty-two years ago)

Geez: if I walked blithely into a Young Republicans meeting and started making loud boorish jokes about George Bush, the fact that they'd jeer me out the door wouldn't make them dicks -- it'd make me a dolt for not having any idea how to tactfully address a given audience. This is why most people would take the safe route in and say something like "I gather you people aren't fond of Toploader, but I do think there's a case to be made for their being pretty great" -- offering some respect for other people's opinions tends to obligate them to take you a little more seriously. The internet's full of "open" forums, but that does not relieve anyone of the everyday obligation of figuring out what kind of environments they're in and how they can most politely and productively address the other people in those environments. We do this all the time in our normal lives: it's why we don't yell about pornography in nursing homes, why we don't make rude jokes about cancer in hospitals, why we don't go to Rolling Stones shows for the sole purpose of telling everyone that the Rolling Stones suck.

I am all in favor of less fuming and simmering resentment on here. But from what I can tell -- and no offence is meant by this -- it's just a few posters who are usually the ones to turn things personal and bring all of that out. I used to think it was worth calling those posters out and telling them to stop, but they're obviously not going to, and their spats usually fade out after a day or two, so it's quite possibly best to just ignore their flare-ups.

― nabisco (nabisco), Tuesday, 28 January 2003 20:16 (twenty-two years ago)

If someone walked into a Young Republicans meeting and started making loud boorish jokes about Toploader that would be pretty good though.

― N. (nickdastoor), Tuesday, 28 January 2003 20:19 (twenty-two years ago)

As for Becky, I looked at her Yahoo profile and it looks real-ish enough. This doesn't change the fact that she's entered an environment and pretty unselfconsciously started behaving in ways that are different from its usual norms; if she's as old as that profile says, she's old enough to understand that when you do stuff like that you're in no position to get all huffy when some people are irritated.

― nabisco (nabisco), Tuesday, 28 January 2003 20:20 (twenty-two years ago)

Do bouncers accept Yahoo Profiles as ID?

― N. (nickdastoor), Tuesday, 28 January 2003 20:22 (twenty-two years ago)

I slightly doubt Andy P's reality (he does sound more than a little Marcello-trollish), but I hadn't noticed him until this thread - I wouldn't be likely to read a Toploader thread.

As for Becky, I started to defend her in a couple of places, only for her to respond to Richard's aggression in ways that made me go right off her. He probably invited insults back, but suggesting that he was only nasty to Becky because he wanted her and anyway he was obviously gay did my opinion of Becky's character and brain no good at all.

― Martin Skidmore (Martin Skidmore), Tuesday, 28 January 2003 21:29 (twenty-two years ago)

Tom - can you ban me?

― Cozen (Cozen), Tuesday, 28 January 2003 21:32 (twenty-two years ago)

''I wouldn't be likely to read a Toploader thread.''

b-but it was fun!!!

― Julio Desouza (jdesouza), Tuesday, 28 January 2003 21:43 (twenty-two years ago)

nick s, i think youll find that everyone loves you!

― gareth (gareth), Tuesday, 28 January 2003 23:58 (twenty-two years ago)

*Thinks she is falling in love with someone here*

― becky lucas (becky_lucas), Wednesday, 29 January 2003 04:50 (twenty-two years ago)

wait...richard isn't gay!

― kirsten k (kirsten), Wednesday, 29 January 2003 05:25 (twenty-two years ago)

oh, nevermind. i just re-read that sentence and finally got it. sorry!

― kirsten k (kirsten), Wednesday, 29 January 2003 05:32 (twenty-two years ago)

Has nobody addressed syntax? Syntax!

By which I mean becky posts in "generation y" text-me stylee -- all sparkles and runons and somewhat rambly train of thoughtish.

This usually puts people right off on ILX whose great quality I think is the care and coherency of thought (ahahaha i'm serious) and even with all the weird quirks of syntax and equations and XoR and etc. there's just a level of care in expression mainly absent from other boards -- even the one liners seem like posters try to make them worthwhile ones.

There's some sense of doing things for the record here, which keeps everyone more tame and less all-over-the-map-chatish, usually, along with a sense that if you are going to break any of these implicit rules, you better have earned it.

― Sterling Clover (s_clover), Wednesday, 29 January 2003 07:01 (twenty-two years ago)

And oh yes, self-concious "you all dislike me!" fits tend to turn people off real fast if kept up (again, if you earn yr. friendly nice contributor card -- which also means answering *other's* threads by the way) these rules tend to become more lax.

And if yr' a frikin spectacular writer when on all cylinders then people will forgive a rather spectacular amount (not to name names).

― Sterling Clover (s_clover), Wednesday, 29 January 2003 07:07 (twenty-two years ago)

Sterling, Now that You are done farting, Do you have anything important to say?

― becky lucas (becky_lucas), Wednesday, 29 January 2003 07:26 (twenty-two years ago)

Oh yes, if you want people to like you, try to be nice when they give you nice advice. You were mean to kate and now you're mean to me.

Honestly, putting commas and capital letters and spaces and etc. in the right places indicates some respect for your readers which they hopefully reciprocate -- so maybe:

"Sterling, now that you're done farting, do you have anything important to say?"

would have worked better.

Not that I'm always good with syntax myself.

― Sterling Clover (s_clover), Wednesday, 29 January 2003 07:37 (twenty-two years ago)

Now that You are done farting, Do you have anything important to say?

Becky, if you asked this of yourself before EACH AND EVERY ONE OF YOUR POSTS, you may well have encountered a more positive reaction to your presence.

― suzy (suzy), Wednesday, 29 January 2003 07:50 (twenty-two years ago)

(Ronan, NOW I SEE so really I was doing an obvious punchline to an obvious punchline which definitely seems worthwhile, in a dumb way)

― Andrew Thames (Andrew Thames), Wednesday, 29 January 2003 10:06 (twenty-two years ago)

why doesnt anyone ever pretend to be a 24 year old man, its great!

― stevem (blueski), Wednesday, 29 January 2003 10:38 (twenty-two years ago)

"smug anti-Toploader beliefs" is my favourite phrase of the day, I want it on a T-shirt. Best thread ever.

― Matt (Matt), Wednesday, 29 January 2003 11:57 (twenty-two years ago)

I think I hold those beliefs is there a church I can join then.

― Ed (dali), Wednesday, 29 January 2003 11:59 (twenty-two years ago)

Hi. I'm a 24-year old man named Sarah. Yeah, really. Isn't that odd? Yeah. What was my mom thinking?

― Sarah McLusky (coco), Wednesday, 29 January 2003 13:39 (twenty-two years ago)

bump

― becky lucas (becky_lucas), Thursday, 30 January 2003 19:02 (twenty-two years ago)

bump

― becky lucas (becky_lucas), Thursday, 30 January 2003 19:03 (twenty-two years ago)

bump

― becky lucas (becky_lucas), Thursday, 30 January 2003 19:03 (twenty-two years ago)

bump

― becky lucas (becky_lucas), Thursday, 30 January 2003 19:03 (twenty-two years ago)

take your sunglasses off, becky, you're inside now

― Tracer Hand (tracerhand), Thursday, 30 January 2003 20:01 (twenty-two years ago)

hahahaha!

― Yanc3y (ystrickler), Thursday, 30 January 2003 20:02 (twenty-two years ago)

sunglasses?

― becky lucas (becky_lucas), Thursday, 30 January 2003 20:07 (twenty-two years ago)

titmouse.

― jess (dubplatestyle), Thursday, 30 January 2003 20:10 (twenty-two years ago)

that word made Homer Simpson giggle
titmouse *giggles*

― becky lucas (becky_lucas), Thursday, 30 January 2003 21:06 (twenty-two years ago)

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