Message Bookmarked

Bookmark Removed

I have resisted since yesterday. I had to post this. KILL ME!

(This is a thread about Jess.

Jess.)

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Wednesday, 12 March 2003 17:05 (twenty-two years ago)

Hah! My will is stronger than yours!

― oops (Oops), Wednesday, 12 March 2003 17:13 (twenty-two years ago)

Someone hit my website last night googling "jess harvell".

― Cozen (Cozen), Wednesday, 12 March 2003 17:14 (twenty-two years ago)

Jess is love.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Wednesday, 12 March 2003 17:14 (twenty-two years ago)

haha full disclosure: that was me

― jess (dubplatestyle), Wednesday, 12 March 2003 17:15 (twenty-two years ago)

"a fit of weary vanity"

― Cozen (Cozen), Wednesday, 12 March 2003 17:17 (twenty-two years ago)

is the "googling your own name when bored" the masturbation of the new century?

― jess (dubplatestyle), Wednesday, 12 March 2003 17:18 (twenty-two years ago)

You google with one hand?

― Cozen (Cozen), Wednesday, 12 March 2003 17:19 (twenty-two years ago)

no, i think "googling brazillian asses" is the masturbation of the new century

― oops (Oops), Wednesday, 12 March 2003 17:19 (twenty-two years ago)

we're all violating a trademark right now

― jess (dubplatestyle), Wednesday, 12 March 2003 17:20 (twenty-two years ago)

Dan Perry's lawyers to thread.

― Cozen (Cozen), Wednesday, 12 March 2003 17:21 (twenty-two years ago)

hi jess!

― donna (donna), Wednesday, 12 March 2003 17:23 (twenty-two years ago)

I thought this read "jess and his board."

― hstencil, Wednesday, 12 March 2003 17:24 (twenty-two years ago)

jess + u = jesus

― mark p (Mark P), Wednesday, 12 March 2003 17:26 (twenty-two years ago)

jess + me = big fites.

― hstencil, Wednesday, 12 March 2003 17:27 (twenty-two years ago)

i miss sk8ing

can we turn this into a thread of pictures of girls in legwarmers

― jess (dubplatestyle), Wednesday, 12 March 2003 17:28 (twenty-two years ago)

http://stylesmart.com/images2/legwarmer01.JPG

― mark p (Mark P), Wednesday, 12 March 2003 17:30 (twenty-two years ago)

(no?)

― mark p (Mark P), Wednesday, 12 March 2003 17:30 (twenty-two years ago)

(yes!)

― Cozen (Cozen), Wednesday, 12 March 2003 17:34 (twenty-two years ago)

how can u talk abt jess and not abt his emo glasses.

(it is at the v core of his esthetix).

― Julio Desouza (jdesouza), Wednesday, 12 March 2003 17:38 (twenty-two years ago)

http://www.sykospark.net/emo/glasses.gif

― mark p (Mark P), Wednesday, 12 March 2003 17:40 (twenty-two years ago)

I also googled myself onto Cozen's page. He said he stole my name.

Weird: and apparently he pressed "send" on an email right about when I was typing his name just then!

Anyway, Jess is great. Sometimes I want to call him "Jester" as a pun on "Chester," but then I realize "jester" already means something.

― nabisco (nabisco), Wednesday, 12 March 2003 17:42 (twenty-two years ago)

jess is our v own joe carducci (heh). a tiny fella who sez stuff that makes 'wah! I can't believe he's just said this!!! *head explodes*'

― Julio Desouza (jdesouza), Wednesday, 12 March 2003 17:46 (twenty-two years ago)

tiny?!

― jess (dubplatestyle), Wednesday, 12 March 2003 17:48 (twenty-two years ago)

(nits, I stole your name?)

― Cozen (Cozen), Wednesday, 12 March 2003 17:48 (twenty-two years ago)

http://www.stylesmart.com/images2/legwarmer03.JPG

― felicity (felicity), Wednesday, 12 March 2003 17:59 (twenty-two years ago)

haha i guess now we know what goes with an eyepatch!

― mark p (Mark P), Wednesday, 12 March 2003 18:02 (twenty-two years ago)

damn you for getting that song in my head, felicity

― Tracer Hand (tracerhand), Wednesday, 12 March 2003 18:02 (twenty-two years ago)

I like Jess, but he still hasn't emailed me his address.

― jel -- (jel), Wednesday, 12 March 2003 18:02 (twenty-two years ago)

That's what you said, Cozen.

― nabisco (nabisco), Wednesday, 12 March 2003 18:31 (twenty-two years ago)

The Eddy Grant song? Damn me!

Good! God! E-lec-tric Ave-e-nue!

― felicity (felicity), Wednesday, 12 March 2003 18:34 (twenty-two years ago)

I'm appauled that finding a photo of Jennifer Beals (sp?) in her legwarmers is nearly impossible

― oops (Oops), Wednesday, 12 March 2003 18:38 (twenty-two years ago)

jess is the bess. love yr shit!

― g.cannon (gcannon), Wednesday, 12 March 2003 18:40 (twenty-two years ago)

I'm everything jess hates.

― nickalicious (nickalicious), Wednesday, 12 March 2003 18:41 (twenty-two years ago)

aw.

― jess (dubplatestyle), Wednesday, 12 March 2003 18:41 (twenty-two years ago)

haha nick you have no idea haha

― gygax! (gygax!), Wednesday, 12 March 2003 18:41 (twenty-two years ago)

haha nick you have no idea haha

True dat. ;-)

― nickalicious (nickalicious), Wednesday, 12 March 2003 18:42 (twenty-two years ago)

get a room you two

― jess (dubplatestyle), Wednesday, 12 March 2003 18:44 (twenty-two years ago)

get a room you two

What a coincidence...I'm in a room right now! :D

― nickalicious (nickalicious), Wednesday, 12 March 2003 18:45 (twenty-two years ago)

You sure it was my website? I can't remember saying that.

― Cozen (Cozen), Wednesday, 12 March 2003 18:46 (twenty-two years ago)

http://www.memefirst.com/images/blah/blah2.jpg

― jess (dubplatestyle), Wednesday, 12 March 2003 22:33 (twenty-two years ago)

Thank you jess. If there really was any beef between us, all is now whole-heartedly forgiven. You are now 100% THE MAN.

― nickalicious (nickalicious), Wednesday, 12 March 2003 22:48 (twenty-two years ago)

i saw a girl today wearing that outfit...THE TERRORISTS HAVE ALREADY WON

(with sexy results)

― jess (dubplatestyle), Wednesday, 12 March 2003 22:49 (twenty-two years ago)

Sexorists!

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Wednesday, 12 March 2003 22:51 (twenty-two years ago)

bitch, put yr lips on my dick!

― Yanc3y (ystrickler), Wednesday, 12 March 2003 22:53 (twenty-two years ago)

what's the other wu lyric? something like, "everytime yr kissing her yr blowing me.."

― Yanc3y (ystrickler), Wednesday, 12 March 2003 22:54 (twenty-two years ago)

i am in love

― mark p (Mark P), Wednesday, 12 March 2003 23:13 (twenty-two years ago)

(gollum fingers and all)

― mark p (Mark P), Wednesday, 12 March 2003 23:14 (twenty-two years ago)

hi jess, you're okay but i wish you wouldn't say nasty things to my friends.

― di smith (lucylurex), Wednesday, 12 March 2003 23:17 (twenty-two years ago)

who did i say nasty things to?

― jess (dubplatestyle), Wednesday, 12 March 2003 23:26 (twenty-two years ago)

(line forms to the left)

― jess (dubplatestyle), Wednesday, 12 March 2003 23:27 (twenty-two years ago)

i think you called me one of ilx's most "sarcasm enfeebled posters" once. that stuck.

― mark p (Mark P), Wednesday, 12 March 2003 23:29 (twenty-two years ago)

it's like hazing people! or dipping the girl you like's pigtails in the inkwell

(although sometimes, yeah, i just dont like people)

― jess (dubplatestyle), Wednesday, 12 March 2003 23:36 (twenty-two years ago)

haha "sometimes"

― M Matos (M Matos), Thursday, 13 March 2003 00:00 (twenty-two years ago)

haha i was trying to be diplomatic

― jess (dubplatestyle), Thursday, 13 March 2003 00:04 (twenty-two years ago)

Face it, Jess, Geir's outstripping you for ego wank as far as these boards go. GO GEIR! DOWN WIT' DA OLE SKEWL! VIVA fuck bollocks fuck raggett raggett /sarcasm /truthful /jess is a big slopping knob.

― Lynskey (Lynskey), Thursday, 13 March 2003 00:40 (twenty-two years ago)

i didn't make this thread

this thread is the will of the people

― jess (dubplatestyle), Thursday, 13 March 2003 00:42 (twenty-two years ago)

I don't think jess has ever told me off. I feel left out.

― Millar (Millar), Thursday, 13 March 2003 00:45 (twenty-two years ago)

jess you are a hypocrite and a dickhead but id still blow you

― chaki (chaki), Thursday, 13 March 2003 00:47 (twenty-two years ago)

tom you called me an asshole on one of your earliest ilm threads!

chaki i dont know why we fight so much (since i admit i'm a hypocrite), but you're alright

― jess (dubplatestyle), Thursday, 13 March 2003 00:51 (twenty-two years ago)

its because i want to give you a bj

― chaki (chaki), Thursday, 13 March 2003 00:55 (twenty-two years ago)

in pumas

― chaki (chaki), Thursday, 13 March 2003 00:56 (twenty-two years ago)

like a big one, old woman who lived in the shoe style?

― jess (dubplatestyle), Thursday, 13 March 2003 01:04 (twenty-two years ago)

please tell me that's not a real ad

― ron (ron), Thursday, 13 March 2003 02:01 (twenty-two years ago)

People need to stop almost saying my name when talking about blowjobs. You're all a bunch of teases!

― Chris P (Chris P), Thursday, 13 March 2003 02:01 (twenty-two years ago)

nevermind

― ron (ron), Thursday, 13 March 2003 02:04 (twenty-two years ago)

piumaman!

― Jody Beth Rosen (Jody Beth Rosen), Thursday, 13 March 2003 03:22 (twenty-two years ago)

Did I mention I got the most recent MST box set the other day? Let me do so!

"Hear the engines roll now!"

"What did you think?"

"It STINKS!"

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Thursday, 13 March 2003 03:24 (twenty-two years ago)

I've yet to get fully jessdissed. I feel like I'm missing out.

― donut bitch (donut), Thursday, 13 March 2003 03:47 (twenty-two years ago)

Haha, Tweedumb and Jess Diss for OWL!

― donut bitch (donut), Thursday, 13 March 2003 03:48 (twenty-two years ago)

Jess is a bully and a asshole, particularly with new posters. He's like ILx's fratboy enforcer.

― nope, Thursday, 13 March 2003 04:31 (twenty-two years ago)

http://www.kuci.org/~brianm/ile/ftlogos/ftlogo_gargamel.jpg

(sorry, but it has to be posted on every Jess thread, donnit?)

― Dan I. (Dan I.), Thursday, 13 March 2003 04:39 (twenty-two years ago)

that may well be. i've never done it anonymously, however...the ironing is delicious.

― jess (dubplatestyle), Thursday, 13 March 2003 04:40 (twenty-two years ago)

smurfs?

― Aaron Grossman (aajjgg), Thursday, 13 March 2003 04:54 (twenty-two years ago)

He's a lovely young man mountain. Always been quite respectful toward us old folks of ILX.

But he needs to send me those garage CDs pdq--I'm drowning in a sea of girl groups and glam. Help, I need something new-fangled.

― Arthur (Arthur), Thursday, 13 March 2003 05:12 (twenty-two years ago)

nine months pass...

i got nothing but love for puma girl

― mark p (Mark P), Monday, 5 January 2004 04:29 (twenty-one years ago)

(don't blame me - blame randomize)

― mark p (Mark P), Monday, 5 January 2004 04:30 (twenty-one years ago)

this is odd.

― fiddo centington (dubplatestyle), Monday, 5 January 2004 04:54 (twenty-one years ago)

"odd"

― Orbit (Orbit), Monday, 5 January 2004 04:57 (twenty-one years ago)

though i am seriously pleased to see the gargamel picture again.

― fiddo centington (dubplatestyle), Monday, 5 January 2004 04:59 (twenty-one years ago)

My "but I thought jess was a girl" story:

i want to marry him but he can never be mine

― @d@ml (nordicskilla), Monday, 5 January 2004 19:52 (twenty-one years ago)

someone ought to tell the puma girl that she has something on her leg, I think it might be superglue.

― jel -- (jel), Monday, 5 January 2004 19:55 (twenty-one years ago)

omg i just spit coffee at my monitor

― fiddo centington (dubplatestyle), Monday, 5 January 2004 19:59 (twenty-one years ago)

It's not a very impressive amount at all, I find this entire thread disappointing.

― Allyzay, Monday, 5 January 2004 20:02 (twenty-one years ago)

well fuck you too

― fiddo centington (dubplatestyle), Monday, 5 January 2004 20:02 (twenty-one years ago)

you find everything disappointing

― Eisbär (llamasfur), Monday, 5 January 2004 20:02 (twenty-one years ago)

I'm just saying, that's all. It's just not a lot of jizz going on there. Gargamel kind of makes up for it but really there's only so much that he can do before I'm kind of like, eh. Now come over here and give Grandpa a kiss.

― Allyzay, Monday, 5 January 2004 20:04 (twenty-one years ago)

...it's not...?

― @d@ml (nordicskilla), Monday, 5 January 2004 20:04 (twenty-one years ago)

what makes you think that's ALL of it?

― mark p (Mark P), Monday, 5 January 2004 20:05 (twenty-one years ago)

i ain't saying nothing ... i could get real gross, but no i won't

― Eisbär (llamasfur), Monday, 5 January 2004 20:05 (twenty-one years ago)

eh.

― Allyzay, Monday, 5 January 2004 20:06 (twenty-one years ago)

i mean seriously, why do you think we love puma girl so much?

― mark p (Mark P), Monday, 5 January 2004 20:07 (twenty-one years ago)

because she's the kinda girl you could really take home to meet your mother.

― fiddo centington (dubplatestyle), Monday, 5 January 2004 20:07 (twenty-one years ago)

not yr dad, though, obviously.

― fiddo centington (dubplatestyle), Monday, 5 January 2004 20:08 (twenty-one years ago)

Well, I was kind of assuming it was an awful lot of sexual frustration but that's cos I'm kind of a huge bitch.

xpost jess I love you, let's get married.

― Allyzay, Monday, 5 January 2004 20:08 (twenty-one years ago)

haha why can't BOTH be the correct answer

― mark p (Mark P), Monday, 5 January 2004 20:09 (twenty-one years ago)

http://www.memefirst.com/images/blah/blah1.jpg

― Allyzay, Monday, 5 January 2004 20:09 (twenty-one years ago)

I thought Jess was marrying the bear???

― El Diablo Robotico (Nicole), Monday, 5 January 2004 20:10 (twenty-one years ago)

Wait, that's not much better, the part on her calf that I thought was jizz turns out to possibly just be light trickery. Puma porn is just totally for shit.

― Allyzay, Monday, 5 January 2004 20:10 (twenty-one years ago)

could just be a rip in her hosiery. YOU ARE THE ONE WITH THE FILTHY MIND, YOUNG LADY!!

― Eisbär (llamasfur), Monday, 5 January 2004 20:12 (twenty-one years ago)

??? Hosiery?? What part of her leg are YOU looking at, Tad?? Apparently not the part with the cum on it?

― Allyzay, Monday, 5 January 2004 20:13 (twenty-one years ago)

oh you're right ... her hosiery ends well below her knee ... i'm tired today.

― Eisbär (llamasfur), Monday, 5 January 2004 20:14 (twenty-one years ago)

it is filthy then!

― Eisbär (llamasfur), Monday, 5 January 2004 20:15 (twenty-one years ago)

No no, I'm saying it's not filthy at all. Well, "at all" is an exagerration but, I mean, it's really not that impressive either. I like her blue outfit though.

― Allyzay, Monday, 5 January 2004 20:16 (twenty-one years ago)

Is it fitting or horrifying that a thread titled "jess and this board" has become a thread debating the artistic merits and quantities of cumshots?

― Allyzay, Monday, 5 January 2004 20:17 (twenty-one years ago)

give my girlfriend track history, more than fitting.

― fiddo centington (dubplatestyle), Monday, 5 January 2004 20:18 (twenty-one years ago)

BUT PERHAPS I'VE SAID TOO MUCH.

― fiddo centington (dubplatestyle), Monday, 5 January 2004 20:18 (twenty-one years ago)

hi! just checking in! glad to see everything's normal!

― teeny in rome (teeny), Monday, 5 January 2004 20:19 (twenty-one years ago)

HI TEENY!

― Eisbär (llamasfur), Monday, 5 January 2004 20:20 (twenty-one years ago)

jess I've been saying too much since I opened my mouth on this damn thread, I don't see why you're suddenly too good for it.

― Allyzay, Monday, 5 January 2004 20:20 (twenty-one years ago)

okay, then

― fiddo centington (dubplatestyle), Monday, 5 January 2004 20:21 (twenty-one years ago)

all the girls i've ever dated have loved to be cummed on

― fiddo centington (dubplatestyle), Monday, 5 January 2004 20:21 (twenty-one years ago)

Cuma cuma cuma cuma
cuma cummee-llion.

― donut bitch (donut), Monday, 5 January 2004 20:21 (twenty-one years ago)

(oh and "rock bottom", natch)

― fiddo centington (dubplatestyle), Monday, 5 January 2004 20:22 (twenty-one years ago)

Seriously though, I think I should get that blue puma outfit.

― Allyzay, Monday, 5 January 2004 20:22 (twenty-one years ago)

it just got weird didn't it

― mark p (Mark P), Monday, 5 January 2004 20:23 (twenty-one years ago)

"with sexy results!"

― mark p (Mark P), Monday, 5 January 2004 20:23 (twenty-one years ago)

"got weird"

― Allyzay, Monday, 5 January 2004 20:23 (twenty-one years ago)

anything to do with me and sex is invariably weird

― fiddo centington (dubplatestyle), Monday, 5 January 2004 20:24 (twenty-one years ago)

AJA

― Eisbär (llamasfur), Monday, 5 January 2004 20:25 (twenty-one years ago)

stop that!!

― fiddo centington (dubplatestyle), Monday, 5 January 2004 20:26 (twenty-one years ago)

Seriously.

― El Diablo Robotico (Nicole), Monday, 5 January 2004 20:26 (twenty-one years ago)

what?

― Orbit (Orbit), Monday, 5 January 2004 20:26 (twenty-one years ago)

Wow that's completely inappropriate and horrifying, Tad. I give it a 9.46.

― Allyzay, Monday, 5 January 2004 20:26 (twenty-one years ago)

he's on his tippie toes. i just noticed this. surely she knows he's short? what is going on here?

― g--ff (gcannon), Monday, 5 January 2004 20:26 (twenty-one years ago)

he's 12

― Eisbär (llamasfur), Monday, 5 January 2004 20:28 (twenty-one years ago)

by proxy it also means he is a short dick man

gah!! x-post!! shut up you fucking pederast!!

― fiddo centington (dubplatestyle), Monday, 5 January 2004 20:28 (twenty-one years ago)

"fucking"

― Orbit (Orbit), Monday, 5 January 2004 20:28 (twenty-one years ago)

That explains the unimpressive jizzing.

― Allyzay, Monday, 5 January 2004 20:29 (twenty-one years ago)

that's probably not why he's on his tippie toes g--ff

― mark p (Mark P), Monday, 5 January 2004 20:29 (twenty-one years ago)

i do a lousy faux-naif. tad, you're sick.

― g--ff (gcannon), Monday, 5 January 2004 20:29 (twenty-one years ago)

who says she's any older?

― Michael Jackson Bär (llamasfur), Monday, 5 January 2004 20:29 (twenty-one years ago)

this thread warms my black, dry heart

― mark p (Mark P), Monday, 5 January 2004 20:30 (twenty-one years ago)

No oen young could afford that bag.

― Nick Southall (Nick Southall), Monday, 5 January 2004 20:30 (twenty-one years ago)

Haha and in one fell swoop, Nick is introduced to the concept of the trustfundian.

― Allyzay, Monday, 5 January 2004 20:31 (twenty-one years ago)

ATTN. TAD: MICHAEL JACKSON JOKES ARE NOT FUNNY. THNX, THE MGMT.

― fiddo centington (dubplatestyle), Monday, 5 January 2004 20:31 (twenty-one years ago)

anything to do with me and sex is invariably weird

Silly boy. Haven't you learned yet that "weird" has become the new norm? In other words, we should all aspire to being as weird as you.

― Nichole Graham (Nichole Graham), Monday, 5 January 2004 20:31 (twenty-one years ago)

"trustafarian," even!

― Eisbär (llamasfur), Monday, 5 January 2004 20:32 (twenty-one years ago)

― fiddo centington (dubplatestyle), Monday, 5 January 2004 20:32 (twenty-one years ago)

gah.

― fiddo centington (dubplatestyle), Monday, 5 January 2004 20:33 (twenty-one years ago)

WHERE IS NICE MAN, WHO AIMS CUMSHOTS??

― Allyzay, Monday, 5 January 2004 20:33 (twenty-one years ago)

I'm only two generations out of the mines.

― Nick Southall (Nick Southall), Monday, 5 January 2004 20:33 (twenty-one years ago)

Oh my.

― Nick Southall (Nick Southall), Monday, 5 January 2004 20:33 (twenty-one years ago)

This is fucked.

― Nick Southall (Nick Southall), Monday, 5 January 2004 20:34 (twenty-one years ago)

i aim but i'm hardly a marksman

― fiddo centington (dubplatestyle), Monday, 5 January 2004 20:34 (twenty-one years ago)

I mean "steel works".

― Nick Southall (Nick Southall), Monday, 5 January 2004 20:34 (twenty-one years ago)

― mark p (Mark P), Monday, 5 January 2004 20:34 (twenty-one years ago)

is someone here 2 generations outta html school AND CAN FIX THIS FUCKING HUGE FONT?

― Eisbär (llamasfur), Monday, 5 January 2004 20:34 (twenty-one years ago)

hi! i work in new media

― mark p (Mark P), Monday, 5 January 2004 20:35 (twenty-one years ago)

It was so beautiful, it didn't need fixing.

― El Diablo Robotico (Nicole), Monday, 5 January 2004 20:35 (twenty-one years ago)

gravity

this thread isnt work safe is it?

― kephm, Monday, 5 January 2004 20:35 (twenty-one years ago)

i did misread this thread title as 'jess and this broad.'

― g--ff (gcannon), Monday, 5 January 2004 20:35 (twenty-one years ago)

I know a pressure point near my perinium that prevents me ejaculationg at all when I orgasm.

― Nick Southall (Nick Southall), Monday, 5 January 2004 20:35 (twenty-one years ago)

Unless I lose concentration.

― Nick Southall (Nick Southall), Monday, 5 January 2004 20:35 (twenty-one years ago)

ey, yo

― fiddo centington (dubplatestyle), Monday, 5 January 2004 20:36 (twenty-one years ago)

what's the stage after 'it just got weird, didn't it?'

― cozen¡ (Cozen), Monday, 5 January 2004 20:36 (twenty-one years ago)

I cry tears of pure joy with this thread.

― Nichole Graham (Nichole Graham), Monday, 5 January 2004 20:37 (twenty-one years ago)

that's like behind your ear right?

― g--ff (gcannon), Monday, 5 January 2004 20:37 (twenty-one years ago)

Nick, your response with the mines thing was the most beautiful thing I ever read.

xpost this pressure point thing is not, however. Keep talking.

― Allyzay, Monday, 5 January 2004 20:37 (twenty-one years ago)

er xpost

― g--ff (gcannon), Monday, 5 January 2004 20:37 (twenty-one years ago)

Strange things happen when you go to lunch.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Monday, 5 January 2004 20:37 (twenty-one years ago)

It got weird behind your ear?

― Nick Southall (Nick Southall), Monday, 5 January 2004 20:37 (twenty-one years ago)

Haha Ned, did something...sexy happen to you at lunch?

― Allyzay, Monday, 5 January 2004 20:38 (twenty-one years ago)

nick - did you learn that from fhm?

― cozen¡ (Cozen), Monday, 5 January 2004 20:38 (twenty-one years ago)

whats with the flesh tone fishnets?

http://www.pcstheatre.org/assets/shows/misr/sisters2.jpg

― kephm, Monday, 5 January 2004 20:38 (twenty-one years ago)

It's a Taoist thing. It used to make me twitch.

― Nick Southall (Nick Southall), Monday, 5 January 2004 20:38 (twenty-one years ago)

Oh baby, flautas. Mmm, yeah.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Monday, 5 January 2004 20:39 (twenty-one years ago)

BOW WOW WOW'S "where's my snake?" just came on the radio, by the bye

― Eisbär (llamasfur), Monday, 5 January 2004 20:39 (twenty-one years ago)

gravity is my best friend

― donut bitch (donut), Monday, 5 January 2004 20:39 (twenty-one years ago)

i have a narrow urethra, like hank hill.

― fiddo centington (dubplatestyle), Monday, 5 January 2004 20:39 (twenty-one years ago)

Not, not FHM, a sex book I have. But me and my mate Matt discussed it once, and he learnt it from FHM. His girlfriend said he woudln't teach her the point though, cos he likes to cum in her mouth.

― Nick Southall (Nick Southall), Monday, 5 January 2004 20:39 (twenty-one years ago)

I have several sex books and no girlfriend.

― Nick Southall (Nick Southall), Monday, 5 January 2004 20:40 (twenty-one years ago)

What does that even mean!!?

FYI the birth control patch makes you extraordinarily horny. Not that I have any first hand knowledge of this.

― Allyzay, Monday, 5 January 2004 20:40 (twenty-one years ago)

I feel it may be time to start going outside again.

― Nick Southall (Nick Southall), Monday, 5 January 2004 20:40 (twenty-one years ago)

My post was to jess, not Nick. I don't have a problem with mouth cumming. I am confused by the urethra thing.

― Allyzay, Monday, 5 January 2004 20:41 (twenty-one years ago)

ally did you fail 8th grade health class?

― fiddo centington (dubplatestyle), Monday, 5 January 2004 20:41 (twenty-one years ago)

everyone listen up: it's not really 'a point', just press the pereneum real hard (and HOLD).

― cozen¡ (Cozen), Monday, 5 January 2004 20:41 (twenty-one years ago)

drippy dick

― Eisbär (llamasfur), Monday, 5 January 2004 20:41 (twenty-one years ago)

hahaha like I attended 8th grade.

― Allyzay, Monday, 5 January 2004 20:41 (twenty-one years ago)

urethra is the tube where the stuff comes out

― fiddo centington (dubplatestyle), Monday, 5 January 2004 20:41 (twenty-one years ago)

(handy supplementary hint: tongue pressed up to roof of mouth)

― mark p (Mark P), Monday, 5 January 2004 20:42 (twenty-one years ago)

or blocked artery in my case

― fiddo centington (dubplatestyle), Monday, 5 January 2004 20:42 (twenty-one years ago)

(obligatory fat cock joke...here)

― fiddo centington (dubplatestyle), Monday, 5 January 2004 20:42 (twenty-one years ago)

just get in there with a pipe cleaner, you'll be fine.

― dr. g--ff (gcannon), Monday, 5 January 2004 20:43 (twenty-one years ago)

Holding is key.

― Nick Southall (Nick Southall), Monday, 5 January 2004 20:43 (twenty-one years ago)

Otherwise you leak.

― Nick Southall (Nick Southall), Monday, 5 January 2004 20:43 (twenty-one years ago)

OK I KNOW WHAT A URETHRA IS!! I HAVE ONE TOO!! I AM WONDERING HOW YOU KNOW IT IS SMALL OR IT IS LARGE.

That is all. That is my confusion.

― Allyzay, Monday, 5 January 2004 20:43 (twenty-one years ago)

I've lasted a minute or more, and then the shakes are just unbearable and I have to stop.

― Nick Southall (Nick Southall), Monday, 5 January 2004 20:44 (twenty-one years ago)

Stop, I'm getting teary for the warped old days of HS Sex Ed

― Nichole Graham (Nichole Graham), Monday, 5 January 2004 20:44 (twenty-one years ago)

the ladies never seemed to have a problem with my inability to ejaculate quickly

― fiddo centington (dubplatestyle), Monday, 5 January 2004 20:44 (twenty-one years ago)

"Ejaculate" is also a synonym for "yell", you know.

― nickalicious (nickalicious), Monday, 5 January 2004 20:45 (twenty-one years ago)

it's one of the few situations where late is better than early

― Eisbär (llamasfur), Monday, 5 January 2004 20:45 (twenty-one years ago)

Oh ok, that's what it means? Yeah, I'm finding I don't really have issue with that at all, ok. I was worried it meant something horrible and painful, cos it sounds horrible and painful and I was upset for you, until you started explaining what a urethra was then I just thought you were a big smart ass.

― Allyzay, Monday, 5 January 2004 20:46 (twenty-one years ago)

so long as you cum

― Eisbär (llamasfur), Monday, 5 January 2004 20:46 (twenty-one years ago)

A minute or more of orgasm.

― Nick Southall (Nick Southall), Monday, 5 January 2004 20:46 (twenty-one years ago)

oh i'll yell at a bitch

― fiddo centington (dubplatestyle), Monday, 5 January 2004 20:46 (twenty-one years ago)

that and dating, tad, it must be reiterated

― g--ff (gcannon), Monday, 5 January 2004 20:46 (twenty-one years ago)

Small urethra = big smarting ass?

― Nick Southall (Nick Southall), Monday, 5 January 2004 20:47 (twenty-one years ago)

A minute+ of actual orgasm sounds like the most uncomfortable thing possible, Southall, wtf?

― Allyzay, Monday, 5 January 2004 20:47 (twenty-one years ago)

after i'm through with her, yes

― fiddo centington (dubplatestyle), Monday, 5 January 2004 20:47 (twenty-one years ago)

x-post...i think

― fiddo centington (dubplatestyle), Monday, 5 January 2004 20:48 (twenty-one years ago)

That's why I was shaking, innit.

― Nick Southall (Nick Southall), Monday, 5 January 2004 20:48 (twenty-one years ago)

Try having a minute plus of orgasm and a; keeing one hand moving and b; keeping the other absolutely still and applying pressure.

― Nick Southall (Nick Southall), Monday, 5 January 2004 20:49 (twenty-one years ago)

I hope my mum never googles my name.

― Nick Southall (Nick Southall), Monday, 5 January 2004 20:50 (twenty-one years ago)

that's a mighty tall tale there, chief

― fiddo centington (dubplatestyle), Monday, 5 January 2004 20:50 (twenty-one years ago)

Only about average.

― Nick Southall (Nick Southall), Monday, 5 January 2004 20:50 (twenty-one years ago)

Oh. You said tale.

― Nick Southall (Nick Southall), Monday, 5 January 2004 20:50 (twenty-one years ago)

isnt this the oldest trick in the book?

― kephm, Monday, 5 January 2004 20:50 (twenty-one years ago)

Probably, if it's a Taoist thing.

― Nick Southall (Nick Southall), Monday, 5 January 2004 20:51 (twenty-one years ago)

what does she do for the spare minute while your communing with the union of the snake or whatever?

― g--ff (gcannon), Monday, 5 January 2004 20:51 (twenty-one years ago)

Yeah, I like to call it the old switcheroo.

― Allyzay, Monday, 5 January 2004 20:52 (twenty-one years ago)

"She"? wtf?!

― Nick Southall (Nick Southall), Monday, 5 January 2004 20:52 (twenty-one years ago)

Seriously, guys are really bored, huh? This is the point where I retell the story of Tom's old roommate admitting to us in a cab that one time, he masturbated 7 times in two hours for lack of better activities.

― Allyzay, Monday, 5 January 2004 20:52 (twenty-one years ago)

or is this a solitaire kinda thing?

haha oblig xpost

― g--ff (gcannon), Monday, 5 January 2004 20:53 (twenty-one years ago)

haha g--ff yr major error is assuming there's anyone else involved here

― fiddo centington (dubplatestyle), Monday, 5 January 2004 20:53 (twenty-one years ago)

What lube did he use?

― Nick Southall (Nick Southall), Monday, 5 January 2004 20:53 (twenty-one years ago)

Haha if he knew this so called oldest trick in the book, I bet he wouldn't have gone on and on pulling it for two hours, eh!!

― Allyzay, Monday, 5 January 2004 20:53 (twenty-one years ago)

He wouldn't have wanted to, that's for sure.

― Nick Southall (Nick Southall), Monday, 5 January 2004 20:54 (twenty-one years ago)

nick is committed to excellence.

― g--ff (gcannon), Monday, 5 January 2004 20:54 (twenty-one years ago)

In all honesty, he probably would've died.

― Allyzay, Monday, 5 January 2004 20:55 (twenty-one years ago)

jess and this board (143 new answers, 217 total, last at 8:54 pm)

145 now, and all about wanking.

― Nick Southall (Nick Southall), Monday, 5 January 2004 20:55 (twenty-one years ago)

I thought I was going to (die).

― Nick Southall (Nick Southall), Monday, 5 January 2004 20:55 (twenty-one years ago)

seven times?!

― Kingfishee (Kingfish), Monday, 5 January 2004 20:55 (twenty-one years ago)

It's not something I've done often.

― Nick Southall (Nick Southall), Monday, 5 January 2004 20:55 (twenty-one years ago)

The lasting-more-than-a-minute thing, that is. I've wanked plenty.

― Nick Southall (Nick Southall), Monday, 5 January 2004 20:56 (twenty-one years ago)

apropos to nithing in particular:Dressed to Kill [Casablanca, 1975]
I feel schizy about this record. It rocks with a brutal, uncompromising force that's very impressive--sort of a slicked-down, tightened-up, heavied-out MC5--and the songwriting is much improved from albums one and two. But the lyrics recall the liberal fantasy of rock concert as Nuremberg rally, equating sex with victimization in a display of male supremacism that glints with humor only at its cruelest--song titles like "Room Service" and "Ladies in Waiting." In this context, the band's refusal to bare the faces that lie beneath the clown makeup becomes ominous, which may be just what they intend, though for the worst of reasons. You know damn well that if they didn't have both eyes on maximum commerciality they'd call themselves Blow Job. B

― Eisbär (llamasfur), Monday, 5 January 2004 20:56 (twenty-one years ago)

Nick, I feel like you're waiting for us to give you an award or something.

― Allyzay, Monday, 5 January 2004 20:57 (twenty-one years ago)

you people

― Eisbär (llamasfur), Monday, 5 January 2004 20:58 (twenty-one years ago)

seriously, now i learn i don't even beat off very well. what kind of man am i?

― g--ff (gcannon), Monday, 5 January 2004 20:58 (twenty-one years ago)

start your own goddamn thread southall

― fiddo centington (dubplatestyle), Monday, 5 January 2004 20:58 (twenty-one years ago)

Sorry jess.

― Nick Southall (Nick Southall), Monday, 5 January 2004 20:59 (twenty-one years ago)

I'm procratinating from adressing two envelopes.

― Nick Southall (Nick Southall), Monday, 5 January 2004 20:59 (twenty-one years ago)

I've lurked for this long, but I have to ask -- Nick when you mean you're coming for a minute, are we talking full-blown coming or are you just delighting in the aftershocks?

― Jeanne Fury (Jeanne Fury), Monday, 5 January 2004 20:59 (twenty-one years ago)

Seriously what if you did that and you broke something and like permanently were orgasming for the rest of your life? Think about it.

― Allyzay, Monday, 5 January 2004 20:59 (twenty-one years ago)

He's aiming to get into the Guinness Book of World Records, ain't he?

― Nichole Graham (Nichole Graham), Monday, 5 January 2004 20:59 (twenty-one years ago)

It'd be like a goddamn milk sprinkler.

if that actually existed, I guess.

― Allyzay, Monday, 5 January 2004 21:00 (twenty-one years ago)

Have you not seen Jam? When the Dutch porn star gets "the gush" and keeps cumming and cumming until he's a withered husk?

― Nick Southall (Nick Southall), Monday, 5 January 2004 21:01 (twenty-one years ago)

"Sometimes, with a strong gush, they can lose 3 stones in two hours."

― Nick Southall (Nick Southall), Monday, 5 January 2004 21:01 (twenty-one years ago)

...

― Allyzay, Monday, 5 January 2004 21:01 (twenty-one years ago)

nick's new nickname = krakatoa

― Eisbär (llamasfur), Monday, 5 January 2004 21:01 (twenty-one years ago)

I guess it's probably aftershocks, Jeanne/

― Nick Southall (Nick Southall), Monday, 5 January 2004 21:01 (twenty-one years ago)

This thread is making me dizzy in the head

― Curt1s St3ph3ns, Monday, 5 January 2004 21:02 (twenty-one years ago)

Oh, wait, yeah, I have it right here, it's between Alice in Wonderland and my Curious George collection.

― Allyzay, Monday, 5 January 2004 21:02 (twenty-one years ago)

If I was power-coming for a full minute, my retinas would detatch and my eyes would be dangling from their sockets.

― Jeanne Fury (Jeanne Fury), Monday, 5 January 2004 21:02 (twenty-one years ago)

So it does make you blind?!

― Nick Southall (Nick Southall), Monday, 5 January 2004 21:04 (twenty-one years ago)

http://volcano.und.nodak.edu/vwdocs/volc_images/southeast_asia/indonesia/krakatau_5b.gif

― Eisbär (llamasfur), Monday, 5 January 2004 21:04 (twenty-one years ago)

So wait, Nick, did you like have an egg timer or something going while you masturbated, btw?

― Allyzay, Monday, 5 January 2004 21:04 (twenty-one years ago)

or maybe that's nick's sex partner after his, um, feats of endurance

― Eisbär (llamasfur), Monday, 5 January 2004 21:05 (twenty-one years ago)

HE HAS SEX WITH EGG TIMERS??? WHAT?

― Allyzay, Monday, 5 January 2004 21:05 (twenty-one years ago)

Nah; I was vaguelly paying attention to how far through the song I was on the CD. It's only a rough guess. It's probably like 20 seconds.

― Nick Southall (Nick Southall), Monday, 5 January 2004 21:06 (twenty-one years ago)

x-post

― Nick Southall (Nick Southall), Monday, 5 January 2004 21:06 (twenty-one years ago)

What song was it? Please please please let it be "Kung Fu Fighting"

― Allyzay, Monday, 5 January 2004 21:06 (twenty-one years ago)

no way it was "old pop in an oak"

― Eisbär (llamasfur), Monday, 5 January 2004 21:07 (twenty-one years ago)

"E-Mail My Heart"

― Curt1s St3ph3ns, Monday, 5 January 2004 21:08 (twenty-one years ago)

whats more fun is doing the pressure trick then stopping before orgasm. it is a good method to keep yourself awake.

― kephm, Monday, 5 January 2004 21:08 (twenty-one years ago)

That's not sexy at all!

― Allyzay, Monday, 5 January 2004 21:08 (twenty-one years ago)

"Ooh Aah Just A Little Bit"

― Nick Southall (Nick Southall), Monday, 5 January 2004 21:08 (twenty-one years ago)

what about "Holding My Own"?

― Kingfishee (Kingfish), Monday, 5 January 2004 21:08 (twenty-one years ago)

my love is a liquid

― Eisbär (llamasfur), Monday, 5 January 2004 21:09 (twenty-one years ago)

cum on eileen

― Eisbär (llamasfur), Monday, 5 January 2004 21:09 (twenty-one years ago)

This is kinda off topic (whatever that may be), but I was talking with my friend Yoon about high protein diets, and he was like, yeah well it's all well and good until you start thinking about pasta when you masturbate.

― Spencer Chow (spencermfi), Monday, 5 January 2004 21:09 (twenty-one years ago)

I was considering posting that minging picture of the horrible pink/red fish with teeth.

― Nick Southall (Nick Southall), Monday, 5 January 2004 21:09 (twenty-one years ago)

OMG NICK YOU HAVE THE BEST ANSWER EVER!!!!! I KISS YOU!!! THE ONLY BETTER THING TO MASTURBATE TO WOULD BE THE VENGABUS SONG!!!

xpost Spencer wtf!!

― Allyzay, Monday, 5 January 2004 21:09 (twenty-one years ago)

Some people probably always think about pasta when they masturbate???

― Allyzay, Monday, 5 January 2004 21:11 (twenty-one years ago)

Lasagne.

― Nick Southall (Nick Southall), Monday, 5 January 2004 21:13 (twenty-one years ago)

vermicelli

― Eisbär (llamasfur), Monday, 5 January 2004 21:13 (twenty-one years ago)

Barry?

― Allyzay, Monday, 5 January 2004 21:13 (twenty-one years ago)

ziti

― Curt1s St3ph3ns, Monday, 5 January 2004 21:14 (twenty-one years ago)

The phallic symbol for the Atkins generation

― Curt1s St3ph3ns, Monday, 5 January 2004 21:15 (twenty-one years ago)

Pasta as masturbation fantasy (or see 'Solo Sploshing')

― Nichole Graham (Nichole Graham), Monday, 5 January 2004 21:16 (twenty-one years ago)

nothing about this place is sexy

― kephm, Monday, 5 January 2004 21:16 (twenty-one years ago)

have a cannolli

― Eisbär (llamasfur), Monday, 5 January 2004 21:17 (twenty-one years ago)

Those wee pasta shapes that are like bows because that reminds me of Bo Peep = peeping = voyeurism = sexy. Rar!

― Nick Southall (Nick Southall), Monday, 5 January 2004 21:17 (twenty-one years ago)

I think he also said, 'dude, there are probably carb starved people in this town who jack off to Emeril'.

― Spencer Chow (spencermfi), Monday, 5 January 2004 21:18 (twenty-one years ago)

This is really a very odd thread.

― Nick Southall (Nick Southall), Monday, 5 January 2004 21:19 (twenty-one years ago)

THIS IS A THREAD ABOUT JESS.

JESS.

― fiddo centington (dubplatestyle), Monday, 5 January 2004 21:19 (twenty-one years ago)

jess harvell

― Eisbär (llamasfur), Monday, 5 January 2004 21:20 (twenty-one years ago)

Renowned music journalist Jess Harvell.

― Nick Southall (Nick Southall), Monday, 5 January 2004 21:20 (twenty-one years ago)

am I going to do this?

No, no I am not.

Yes, yes I am.

BAM!

― Allyzay, Monday, 5 January 2004 21:20 (twenty-one years ago)

lover not fighter

― Eisbär (llamasfur), Monday, 5 January 2004 21:21 (twenty-one years ago)

Bam is the new bingo.

― luna (luna.c), Monday, 5 January 2004 21:21 (twenty-one years ago)

You're just seeing that now?

(xpost)

JESS

As if that would create a thread detour? Wish on, dude.

― Nichole Graham (Nichole Graham), Monday, 5 January 2004 21:21 (twenty-one years ago)

Jess Harvell who has been featured in such publications as the Village Voice.

― Allyzay, Monday, 5 January 2004 21:23 (twenty-one years ago)

Wank wank wank wank wank.

― Nick Southall (Nick Southall), Monday, 5 January 2004 21:24 (twenty-one years ago)

Cum-guzzling whore Paris Hilton.

― Nick Southall (Nick Southall), Monday, 5 January 2004 21:24 (twenty-one years ago)

it rhymes with "carvel"

― Eisbär (llamasfur), Monday, 5 January 2004 21:24 (twenty-one years ago)

I imagine sitting naked in a bucket of cooked spaghetti could produce a nice-enough sensation.

― Jeanne Fury (Jeanne Fury), Monday, 5 January 2004 21:24 (twenty-one years ago)

HENTAI BUKKAKE PARIS HILTON BRITNEY LESBIAN KISS JESS HARVELL.

― Allyzay, Monday, 5 January 2004 21:25 (twenty-one years ago)

Jess is a good man.

― Curt1s St3ph3ns, Monday, 5 January 2004 21:25 (twenty-one years ago)

i ~~lovehate~~am ambivalent about you all

― fiddo centington (dubplatestyle), Monday, 5 January 2004 21:27 (twenty-one years ago)

Jenna Jameson tits tits tits huge cocks Jess Harvell porn porn porn amateurs.

― Nick Southall (Nick Southall), Monday, 5 January 2004 21:27 (twenty-one years ago)

The thing is, Jess, we totally wouldn't bother with anyone else.

― Nick Southall (Nick Southall), Monday, 5 January 2004 21:27 (twenty-one years ago)

yes, i know.

― fiddo centington (dubplatestyle), Monday, 5 January 2004 21:28 (twenty-one years ago)

Cuz we luv yer.

― Nick Southall (Nick Southall), Monday, 5 January 2004 21:28 (twenty-one years ago)

I almost mean that.

― Nick Southall (Nick Southall), Monday, 5 January 2004 21:28 (twenty-one years ago)

yeah, don't patronize me.

― fiddo centington (dubplatestyle), Monday, 5 January 2004 21:29 (twenty-one years ago)

Someone please stop me from posting the pic of jess and the bear. Please. Someone?

― Allyzay, Monday, 5 January 2004 21:29 (twenty-one years ago)

I was looking for that picture of ma$e, but all I could find was this:

http://www.auntie.com/dustcatchers/diamond/sw-mace.jpg

― Spencer Chow (spencermfi), Monday, 5 January 2004 21:29 (twenty-one years ago)

I can't afford to, Ally.

― Nick Southall (Nick Southall), Monday, 5 January 2004 21:30 (twenty-one years ago)

wow. Spencer. Wow. Damn.

― Allyzay, Monday, 5 January 2004 21:30 (twenty-one years ago)

wtf is that?!

― fiddo centington (dubplatestyle), Monday, 5 January 2004 21:30 (twenty-one years ago)

btw:

http://members.aol.com/dubplatestyle/mase.jpg

― fiddo centington (dubplatestyle), Monday, 5 January 2004 21:31 (twenty-one years ago)

I think it's Samuel L Jackson after the mutant shark eats him in Deep Blue Sea.

― Nick Southall (Nick Southall), Monday, 5 January 2004 21:31 (twenty-one years ago)

http://www.google.co.uk/search?hl=en&ie=UTF-8&oe=UTF-8&q=jess+harvell+paris+hilton&meta=

― Nick Southall (Nick Southall), Monday, 5 January 2004 21:33 (twenty-one years ago)

his character name is Mace something. Who the hell would put that in their home??? I'm imagining it now sitting next to my monitor at work!

― Spencer Chow (spencermfi), Monday, 5 January 2004 21:34 (twenty-one years ago)

It's like the Winged Victory of Samuel L Jackson.

― Spencer Chow (spencermfi), Monday, 5 January 2004 21:34 (twenty-one years ago)

I'd like to leave it on my desk at work on Friday evening as a little going away present to these bastards.

― Allyzay, Monday, 5 January 2004 21:36 (twenty-one years ago)

I've seriously been laughing so hard at that thing that I now have to go pee. Jesus fucking christ.

― Allyzay, Monday, 5 January 2004 21:38 (twenty-one years ago)

Badass De Milo

― stevem (blueski), Monday, 5 January 2004 21:40 (twenty-one years ago)

http://www.wildpigcomics.com/images/statues3/macewindu.jpg

― Spencer Chow (spencermfi), Monday, 5 January 2004 21:43 (twenty-one years ago)

now we know what happened to ONYX

― Eisbär (llamasfur), Monday, 5 January 2004 21:43 (twenty-one years ago)

Oh my.

― Nick Southall (Nick Southall), Monday, 5 January 2004 21:43 (twenty-one years ago)

now's that what i call Photoshoppability

― stevem (blueski), Monday, 5 January 2004 21:45 (twenty-one years ago)

Spencer, when is your birthday?

― Allyzay, Monday, 5 January 2004 21:45 (twenty-one years ago)

NNNNNOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOooooooooooooo!

― Nick Southall (Nick Southall), Monday, 5 January 2004 21:46 (twenty-one years ago)

http://www.popcornlive.co.uk/products/03197.jpg

― Allyzay, Monday, 5 January 2004 21:46 (twenty-one years ago)

What the fuck is that?

― Nick Southall (Nick Southall), Monday, 5 January 2004 21:47 (twenty-one years ago)

Is that Amidala? Why's it got breasts?

― Nick Southall (Nick Southall), Monday, 5 January 2004 21:47 (twenty-one years ago)

http://www.starwars.com/collecting/news/2002/03/img/gg_obiwan_sm.jpg

― Allyzay, Monday, 5 January 2004 21:47 (twenty-one years ago)

It's Jesus, and he's out for blood!

― Nichole Graham (Nichole Graham), Monday, 5 January 2004 21:48 (twenty-one years ago)

Those first two are like Star Wars meets Boxing Helena.

― bnw (bnw), Monday, 5 January 2004 21:49 (twenty-one years ago)

"Qui Gon bust" gives me this:

http://users.skynet.be/cheops/Qui%20gon%20jin.jpg

??!

― Allyzay, Monday, 5 January 2004 21:49 (twenty-one years ago)

"Hey Spencer, why is that armless black man on your desk and what is he yelling about?"

― Spencer Chow (spencermfi), Monday, 5 January 2004 21:50 (twenty-one years ago)

a cat with it's nose burnt off?

― stevem (blueski), Monday, 5 January 2004 21:50 (twenty-one years ago)

http://www.squidworks.com/Events/2002SDCC/Dcp_0018.jpg

― oops (Oops), Monday, 5 January 2004 21:51 (twenty-one years ago)

"Boxing Helena" references make my day.

― Dan Perry (Dan Perry), Monday, 5 January 2004 21:51 (twenty-one years ago)

is that ned?

― mark p (Mark P), Monday, 5 January 2004 21:51 (twenty-one years ago)

No, seriously, Spencer, when is your birthday? I promise I'm asking this question not because I want to buy you a Mace Windu bust. Seriously. I'm just curious.

― Allyzay, Monday, 5 January 2004 21:52 (twenty-one years ago)

http://www.captainbluehen.com/gfx/scans/greedo.jpg

― Allyzay, Monday, 5 January 2004 21:52 (twenty-one years ago)

jessing the board

― donut bitch (donut), Monday, 5 January 2004 21:52 (twenty-one years ago)

Ally, I'm going to avoid the question in hopes of you forgetting it by the time it rolls around!

― Spencer Chow (spencermfi), Monday, 5 January 2004 21:53 (twenty-one years ago)

forgetting the Samuel bust that is.

― Spencer Chow (spencermfi), Monday, 5 January 2004 21:53 (twenty-one years ago)

What is that? Gizmo's alien lovechild?

― Nichole Graham (Nichole Graham), Monday, 5 January 2004 21:54 (twenty-one years ago)

Spencer, I'm heartbroken.

http://www.alamone.com/expo/P7050201.JPG

That is a photo to express my heartbroken.

― Allyzay, Monday, 5 January 2004 21:54 (twenty-one years ago)

ok, cheer up, it's 3/4.

― Spencer Chow (spencermfi), Monday, 5 January 2004 21:55 (twenty-one years ago)

Check out the woman in black.

― Nick Southall (Nick Southall), Monday, 5 January 2004 21:55 (twenty-one years ago)

Why has the big blue guy got 2 yellow hernias?

― Nick Southall (Nick Southall), Monday, 5 January 2004 21:56 (twenty-one years ago)

OK does anyone remember that song from when you were little, about how all of the things are doing the same thing but one of the things are just not the same? Yeah.

http://www.alamone.com/expo/P7050197.JPG

― Allyzay, Monday, 5 January 2004 21:56 (twenty-one years ago)

to express my heartbroken

..two bladder sacs. (? wtf!)

― donut bitch (donut), Monday, 5 January 2004 21:56 (twenty-one years ago)

I'm curious about 'Bob: The Angry Flower' from that Ned in carbonite pic.

― Spencer Chow (spencermfi), Monday, 5 January 2004 21:56 (twenty-one years ago)

haha xpost guess who's getting a ~~Samuel L. Jackson horrorbust~~nice autographed photo of Alizee in two months!!

― Allyzay, Monday, 5 January 2004 21:57 (twenty-one years ago)

http://www.cosmicclutter.com/Collectibles/Images/SWAnakinBust2.jpg

― El Diablo Robotico (Nicole), Monday, 5 January 2004 21:58 (twenty-one years ago)

I remember the tiny Asian French waitress in Return Of The Jedi. She was serving the Care Bears milk.

― Nick Southall (Nick Southall), Monday, 5 January 2004 21:59 (twenty-one years ago)

strongo hulkington

http://www.grahamcrackers.com/images/hulkgreen.jpg

― Allyzay, Monday, 5 January 2004 22:00 (twenty-one years ago)

Jess is special! He has arms! Big, fucking huge arms that could crush Montana! (The RW cast member, not the state.)

― Dan Perry (Dan Perry), Monday, 5 January 2004 22:02 (twenty-one years ago)

Ally, for serious???!!!

also:
http://images.google.com/images?q=tbn:lgQc8zO5EGMC:www.coolcollecting.com/customs/contest2/aotcmacewindu.jpg

― Spencer Chow (spencermfi), Monday, 5 January 2004 22:02 (twenty-one years ago)

http://www.profootballhof.com/photos/montana_bust072900.gif

xpost totally for serious!! If I don't forget.

― Allyzay, Monday, 5 January 2004 22:03 (twenty-one years ago)

HULK SMASH PUNY QB

― Dan Perry (Dan Perry), Monday, 5 January 2004 22:04 (twenty-one years ago)

http://www.angelfire.com/nv/billsthunder/KELLYSHRINE.jpg

haha apparently this is the outfit you HAVE to wear when you go into the Hall of Fame?

― Allyzay, Monday, 5 January 2004 22:06 (twenty-one years ago)

oh my god this thread makes me so indescribably happy

― fiddo centington (dubplatestyle), Monday, 5 January 2004 22:07 (twenty-one years ago)

speaking of hulkingtons, I saw these in person and they're great!

http://images.amazon.com/images/P/B0000798L5.01.PT01.LZZZZZZZ.jpg

http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/ASIN/B0000798L5/102-5033130-3436120

they make funny noises!

― Spencer Chow (spencermfi), Monday, 5 January 2004 22:08 (twenty-one years ago)

http://www.osric.com/~jeremy/imp2.jpg

When you're wandering around an outside festival in detroit, and you see a guy in full armor, why not join in the fun?

― Kingfishee (Kingfish), Monday, 5 January 2004 22:09 (twenty-one years ago)

Please tell me you now own those, Spencer.

― Allyzay, Monday, 5 January 2004 22:09 (twenty-one years ago)

i do!!

― fiddo centington (dubplatestyle), Monday, 5 January 2004 22:10 (twenty-one years ago)

Ally, I'd wear that suit anyway.

― Curt1s St3ph3ns, Monday, 5 January 2004 22:10 (twenty-one years ago)

Those HOF pics are awesome. You've gotta love pics of people lovingly caressing busts of themselves.

Also, Ned in carbonite.

― Broheems (diamond), Monday, 5 January 2004 22:11 (twenty-one years ago)

I just got the worst case of ILE deja vu ever I think, holy shit

― TOMBOT, Monday, 5 January 2004 22:12 (twenty-one years ago)

The guy next to me at work has those hulkhands. They're awesome!

― Spencer Chow (spencermfi), Monday, 5 January 2004 22:12 (twenty-one years ago)

Guess who just added the above glorious fun item to his wish list? (JANUARY 18)

― Dan Perry (Dan Perry), Monday, 5 January 2004 22:13 (twenty-one years ago)

jess you are my god.

I think everyone needs a lemon meringue colored suit, it's delicious and stylish.

― Allyzay, Monday, 5 January 2004 22:13 (twenty-one years ago)

Lynn Swann wears the outfit!!

http://www.profootballhof.com/photos/swann_bust_thumb.jpg

― Allyzay, Monday, 5 January 2004 22:15 (twenty-one years ago)

http://www.profootballhof.com/photos/levy_bust_thumb.jpg

― Allyzay, Monday, 5 January 2004 22:16 (twenty-one years ago)

http://www.profootballhof.com/photos/long_bust072900.gif

Haha for some reason I want to superimpose Curious George into all of these photos.

― Allyzay, Monday, 5 January 2004 22:17 (twenty-one years ago)

"fridge bust":

http://www.shaneland.co.uk/personalpages/shane/images/edgbaston/11902.jpg

― fiddo centington (dubplatestyle), Monday, 5 January 2004 22:17 (twenty-one years ago)

Marv! I met him once, he was really friendly.

― Broheems (diamond), Monday, 5 January 2004 22:17 (twenty-one years ago)

YOU MET MARV LEVY????????????!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

NFL.com has deleted the OJ Simpson bust. My main goal in life now is to go to the Hall of Fame and photograph the OJ Simpson bust.

― Allyzay, Monday, 5 January 2004 22:20 (twenty-one years ago)

Clearly the first "Marv" that comes to mind after Jess's picture is "Alpert".

― Dan Perry (Dan Perry), Monday, 5 January 2004 22:21 (twenty-one years ago)

it's a testament to how long it's been since i got laid that said picture gives me a boner

― fiddo centington (dubplatestyle), Monday, 5 January 2004 22:22 (twenty-one years ago)

this thread is google doom

― fiddo centington (dubplatestyle), Monday, 5 January 2004 22:23 (twenty-one years ago)

Yeah, I always think of the Tijuana Brass when I see girls with mad munchies too.

― Allyzay, Monday, 5 January 2004 22:23 (twenty-one years ago)

it's a testament to how long it's been since i got laid that said picture gives me a boner

I HATE YOU SO MUCH RIGHT NOW

― Kelis (Dan Perry), Monday, 5 January 2004 22:23 (twenty-one years ago)

it just makes me want a beer

― stevem (blueski), Monday, 5 January 2004 22:25 (twenty-one years ago)

where is a serious girl, who aims bukkake

― fiddo centington (dubplatestyle), Monday, 5 January 2004 22:25 (twenty-one years ago)

We did that earlier.

― Allyzay, Monday, 5 January 2004 22:25 (twenty-one years ago)

http://image.allmusic.com/00/amg/cov200/drf700/f747/f74701lsvew.jpg

that kinda brings it all full circle.

― Broheems (diamond), Monday, 5 January 2004 22:26 (twenty-one years ago)

What, like "Okay, now the left eye"?

― Dan Perry (Dan Perry), Monday, 5 January 2004 22:26 (twenty-one years ago)

(I R slow typist.)

― Dan Perry (Dan Perry), Monday, 5 January 2004 22:26 (twenty-one years ago)

http://dewin.oldbattery.com/venura/image.php?id=19538&mtime=1073341629

― Curt1s St3ph3ns, Monday, 5 January 2004 22:27 (twenty-one years ago)

(I R completely losing my shit.)

― Dan Perry (Dan Perry), Monday, 5 January 2004 22:28 (twenty-one years ago)

i was gonna say, jess. those two beat the pumagirls no prob

― g--ff (gcannon), Monday, 5 January 2004 22:28 (twenty-one years ago)

ow...curtis...my heart

― fiddo centington (dubplatestyle), Monday, 5 January 2004 22:29 (twenty-one years ago)

http://www.instantreplaysportcard.com/items/lithos/favre.jpg

― Allyzay, Monday, 5 January 2004 22:30 (twenty-one years ago)

I'm with stevem and also seriously I swear this whole thread either happened in a nightmare I had once and/or this is like some kind of "Dark City" shit and I didn't get my injection last night

― TOMBOT, Monday, 5 January 2004 22:31 (twenty-one years ago)

dark city was shit alright. at least it looked good

― kephm, Monday, 5 January 2004 22:33 (twenty-one years ago)

Your search - kelly osbourne ass - did not match any documents.

Suggestions:
- Make sure all words are spelled correctly.
- Try different keywords.
- Try more general keywords.
- Try fewer keywords.

Also, you can try Google Answers for expert help with your search.

― fiddo centington (dubplatestyle), Monday, 5 January 2004 22:33 (twenty-one years ago)

http://www.ncaa.org/news/1998/19980105/graphics/manning.gif?

― Allyzay, Monday, 5 January 2004 22:33 (twenty-one years ago)

we are veering dangerously into peyton manning territory here

uh oh xpost

― mark p (Mark P), Monday, 5 January 2004 22:35 (twenty-one years ago)

http://www.vernallen.co.uk/images/manning.jpg

― stevem (blueski), Monday, 5 January 2004 22:36 (twenty-one years ago)

an orgasm thread

― Allyzay, Monday, 5 January 2004 22:36 (twenty-one years ago)

http://www.beans-around-the-world.com/photos/canton4.jpg

― TOMBOT, Monday, 5 January 2004 22:37 (twenty-one years ago)

OMG YOU ARE THE BEST BOYFRIEND EVER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

― Allyzay, Monday, 5 January 2004 22:38 (twenty-one years ago)

This is a thread about Jess's orgasms.

Jess's orgasms.

― fiddo centington (dubplatestyle), Monday, 5 January 2004 22:38 (twenty-one years ago)

Don't be fooled by the fact that I bored
I'm still, I'm still jess from the board
Used to have a sack, now I have a drawer
No matter who i do, I know where she came from (South-Side PA!)
Don't be fooled by the chicks that I scored
I'm still, I'm still jess from the board
Used to chill in Oly, but i 'scaped that hellhole-y
No matter what the pizza, toppings be unholy! (South-Side PA!)

― donut bitch (donut), Monday, 5 January 2004 22:38 (twenty-one years ago)

this thread just keeps on giving.

― fiddo centington (dubplatestyle), Monday, 5 January 2004 22:39 (twenty-one years ago)

what the hell is with the tin next to that OJ bust?

and hahaha

― stevem (blueski), Monday, 5 January 2004 22:41 (twenty-one years ago)

The URL reveals that it must be beans.

― Curt1s St3ph3ns, Monday, 5 January 2004 22:42 (twenty-one years ago)

I gotta get a smaller refrigerator.

― Spencer Chow (spencermfi), Monday, 5 January 2004 22:43 (twenty-one years ago)

clearly it is the key to happiness.

― fiddo centington (dubplatestyle), Monday, 5 January 2004 22:44 (twenty-one years ago)

http://www.beans-around-the-world.com/photos/naked02.jpg

― TOMBARF, Monday, 5 January 2004 22:45 (twenty-one years ago)

FRIJOLES NEGROS!

― donut bitch (donut), Monday, 5 January 2004 22:45 (twenty-one years ago)

I'm still incredibly, unbelievably excited about the OJ bust. Thank god I don't have to go to Cleveland now.

xpost FUCK YOU YOU DIDN'T HAVE TO SEE THE NAKED COWBOY EVERY SINGLE DAY FOR A MONTH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

― Allyzay, Monday, 5 January 2004 22:45 (twenty-one years ago)

MY LIBIDO HAS BEEN KILLED FOREVER.

― Allyzay, Monday, 5 January 2004 22:46 (twenty-one years ago)

the chick next to him is hott

― fiddo centington (dubplatestyle), Monday, 5 January 2004 22:46 (twenty-one years ago)

erm

― fiddo centington (dubplatestyle), Monday, 5 January 2004 22:47 (twenty-one years ago)

http://www.beans-around-the-world.com/photos/java1.jpg

The SAME can of FRIJOLES NEGROS? Creeeeeeeepy

― donut bitch (donut), Monday, 5 January 2004 22:47 (twenty-one years ago)

What we don't see in that picture is Ally shackled to the fence next to the rush ticket stand sobbing for bemused passers-by to stab her in the face, for the love of all that's holy.

(xpost works for DB's pic, too; in fact, I think every picture ever can be enhanced by mentally adding some sobbing for sweet release just out of frame)

― Dan Perry (Dan Perry), Monday, 5 January 2004 22:49 (twenty-one years ago)

Yeah, it's like I'm Andromeda and that photograph is Clash of Titans.

― Allyzay, Monday, 5 January 2004 22:50 (twenty-one years ago)

http://cdcovers.iespana.es/cdcovers/CoversW/Who-The_Who_Sell_Out-Front.jpg

― Broheems (diamond), Monday, 5 January 2004 22:51 (twenty-one years ago)

http://www.beans-around-the-world.com/photos/dc15.jpg
I also like to smear mud on my ass.

― TOMBOT, Monday, 5 January 2004 22:54 (twenty-one years ago)

(Sorry Ally, it's just that I read your post and thought, "Who made you go and look at him?" which then turned into the funny image of you being trapped in Times Square while this dude "flaunted his wares" at the unsuspecting tourists and then I just had to Danify the whole thing.)

― Dan Perry (Dan Perry), Monday, 5 January 2004 22:55 (twenty-one years ago)

I will now play a tune in honor of black beans, head busts, jesso boardington, and all the Alize's in the house:

http://www.kuci.org/~brianm/ile/javajive/saddam_01.jpg

― donut bitch (donut), Monday, 5 January 2004 22:56 (twenty-one years ago)

(On the plus side, I'm now imagining a naked Kraken annoying Times Square tourists with an acoustic guitar.)

― Dan Perry (Dan Perry), Monday, 5 January 2004 22:56 (twenty-one years ago)

I'm imagining my boyfriend smearing mud on people's asses and getting quite alarmed. Kraken isn't exactly improving the situation at all.

― Allyzay, Monday, 5 January 2004 22:58 (twenty-one years ago)

I went off to write a column about Michael Bublé and OJ happened. With beans. You don't know how sad I feel.

― Nick Southall (Nick Southall), Monday, 5 January 2004 23:22 (twenty-one years ago)

nine months pass...

(On the plus side, I'm now imagining a naked Kraken annoying Times Square tourists with an acoustic guitar.)

...Sometimes I worry about myself.

― The Ghost of Dan Perry (Dan Perry), Tuesday, 2 November 2004 19:04 (twenty years ago)

But such a sweet worry.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Tuesday, 2 November 2004 19:07 (twenty years ago)

This is one of my top 10 favorite threads.

― Spencer Chow (spencermfi), Tuesday, 2 November 2004 19:08 (twenty years ago)

I miss Jess A LOT. :(

― nickalicious (nickalicious), Tuesday, 2 November 2004 19:09 (twenty years ago)

I wish all the pics still worked.

http://www.nitrocomics.com/macewindubust.gif

― Spencer Chow (spencermfi), Tuesday, 2 November 2004 19:12 (twenty years ago)

ESPECIALLY THE PUMA AD

― nickalicious (nickalicious), Tuesday, 2 November 2004 19:12 (twenty years ago)

Yeah, Jess should come back.

― jel -- (jel), Tuesday, 2 November 2004 19:30 (twenty years ago)

no! he's happier without us! why don't you want him to be happy?!?!!

― manthony m1cc1o (Anthony Miccio), Tuesday, 2 November 2004 19:34 (twenty years ago)

I do! I didn't mean it like that.

― jel -- (jel), Tuesday, 2 November 2004 19:35 (twenty years ago)

ilx misses jess.

― roxymuzak (roxymuzak), Tuesday, 2 November 2004 19:36 (twenty years ago)

you can read his blog! Send him an e-mail, leave a comment. He's still accessible.

― manthony m1cc1o (Anthony Miccio), Tuesday, 2 November 2004 19:37 (twenty years ago)

I forgot all about that Mace Windu thing, wow.

― Allyzay Science Explosion (allyzay), Tuesday, 2 November 2004 20:31 (twenty years ago)

http://www.darkmattermag.com/august03/images/starwarsminibusts04a_2.jpg

― Spencer Chow (spencermfi), Tuesday, 2 November 2004 20:39 (twenty years ago)

YOU DON'T EVEN KNOW THE GIGGLES ITS GIVING ME.

― Allyzay Science Explosion (allyzay), Tuesday, 2 November 2004 20:40 (twenty years ago)

for completists:
http://www.onlyafew.com/TOYS/SW/GAZOU/MACE*.jpg

― Spencer Chow (spencermfi), Tuesday, 2 November 2004 20:51 (twenty years ago)

what in the sam hell

― roxymuzak (roxymuzak), Tuesday, 2 November 2004 20:53 (twenty years ago)

The more I see it, the more I'm kind of enamoured of the idea of owning it.

― Allyzay Science Explosion (allyzay), Tuesday, 2 November 2004 21:09 (twenty years ago)

miccio otm.

― cºzen (Cozen), Tuesday, 2 November 2004 21:10 (twenty years ago)

xpost.

I was thinking exactly the same thing. I can see it both improving my mood and urging me to action. I would touch the stumps, but I *would not* put my finger anywhere near the mouth.

― Spencer Chow (spencermfi), Tuesday, 2 November 2004 21:11 (twenty years ago)

omg

― mookieproof (mookieproof), Tuesday, 2 November 2004 21:12 (twenty years ago)

For some reason, I always shake my head and chuckle bemusedly whenever I read this thread title.

― Spencer Chow (spencermfi), Tuesday, 2 November 2004 21:21 (twenty years ago)

Great, now I want to touch the stumps.

― The Ghost of Dan Perry (Dan Perry), Tuesday, 2 November 2004 21:23 (twenty years ago)

touch the stumps, touch the stumps!

― luna (luna.c), Tuesday, 2 November 2004 21:23 (twenty years ago)

"Is this some kind of bust?"

"Well, it's very impressive, yes, but we need to ask you a few questions."

― Spencer Chow (spencermfi), Tuesday, 2 November 2004 21:32 (twenty years ago)

one year passes...

i was deeply saddened to see those puma pictures gone forever

― PARTYMAN (dubplatestyle), Friday, 8 September 2006 00:14 (nineteen years ago)

http://www.schuhsport-krahn.de/uploads/pics/blow_job2_40044938.jpg

― milo z (mlp), Friday, 8 September 2006 00:38 (nineteen years ago)

http://cache.gawker.com/thumbs/puma1.jpg

― milo z (mlp), Friday, 8 September 2006 00:39 (nineteen years ago)

ask and ye shall recieve

― PARTYMAN (dubplatestyle), Friday, 8 September 2006 01:08 (nineteen years ago)

Fuck, that's hot.

― Andrew (enneff), Friday, 8 September 2006 01:11 (nineteen years ago)

speechless.

― disappointing goth fest line-up (orion), Friday, 8 September 2006 01:16 (nineteen years ago)

wow that cheered me up.

― geoff (gcannon), Friday, 8 September 2006 17:59 (nineteen years ago)

― gbx (skowly), Friday, 8 September 2006 18:00 (nineteen years ago)

Too bad those Pumas are so horrendous and it spoiled the rest of the picture. As I said before, my vagina is, as a result, dryer than the Sahara.

― Nathalie (stevie nixed), Friday, 8 September 2006 18:07 (nineteen years ago)

the socks and skirts are pretty awesome though

― rrrobyn, the situation (rrrobyn), Friday, 8 September 2006 18:29 (nineteen years ago)

Girl B needs Girl A's fleshier fishnets.

― milo z (mlp), Friday, 8 September 2006 18:32 (nineteen years ago)

wait, i like the red shoes too

― rrrobyn, the situation (rrrobyn), Friday, 8 September 2006 18:32 (nineteen years ago)

WHO WANTS TOASTER STRUDEL

― David R. (popshots75`), Friday, 8 September 2006 18:35 (nineteen years ago)

Turf shoes = SERIOUS TONGUE ACTION

― Andy_K (Andy_K), Friday, 8 September 2006 19:01 (nineteen years ago)

http://shutyrgob.blogspot.com/

― deej.. (deej..), Friday, 8 September 2006 19:14 (nineteen years ago)

"SQUANTOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO....

...A Warrior's Tale! *gulp*"

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Friday, 8 September 2006 19:14 (nineteen years ago)

http://othernessblue.blogspot.com/

― Andy_K (Andy_K), Friday, 8 September 2006 19:25 (nineteen years ago)

http://letsbuildacar.blogspot.com/

― Andy_K (Andy_K), Friday, 8 September 2006 19:27 (nineteen years ago)

xpost i didn't know he spoke (or rather wrote) japanese.

― Nathalie (stevie nixed), Friday, 8 September 2006 19:35 (nineteen years ago)

He's a talent, our Jess.

― David R. (popshots75`), Friday, 8 September 2006 20:01 (nineteen years ago)

TOUCH THE STUMPS!

― Young Fresh Danny D (Dan Perry), Tuesday, 12 September 2006 12:53 (nineteen years ago)

eight months pass...

let's all take a moment to dwell on the puma girl

― strongohulkington, Thursday, 24 May 2007 23:11 (eighteen years ago)

we keep recycling, eating our own poop for nutritition, closing ourselves off and taking in nothing new, until our poop becomes so stripped of nutrition, so bare and acrid and acidic that it rots our teeth out.

― Spencer Chow, Thursday, 24 May 2007 23:16 (eighteen years ago)

that should have been in quotes.

― Spencer Chow, Thursday, 24 May 2007 23:30 (eighteen years ago)

"dwell"

― haitch, Thursday, 24 May 2007 23:32 (eighteen years ago)

the chinese have been tilling the soil with their own excrement for 4000 years, though. I dunno about the teeth situation.

― TOMBOT, Thursday, 24 May 2007 23:33 (eighteen years ago)

that was a vahid quote from an ILM thread, btw

― Spencer Chow, Thursday, 24 May 2007 23:37 (eighteen years ago)

I am happy to report my vagina isn't that dry anymore, even after watching those Pumas. God, those awful, design wise.

― nathalie, Friday, 25 May 2007 07:37 (eighteen years ago)

one year passes...

I kind of think there's something wrong with a lot of us sometimes.

― Black Seinfeld (HI DERE), Wednesday, 19 November 2008 21:46 (sixteen years ago)

Likely enough.

― Ned Raggett, Wednesday, 19 November 2008 21:46 (sixteen years ago)

You must be logged in to post. Please either login here, or if you are not registered, you may register here.