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The simple joy of stupid spam names

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One must eke out morsels of comfort and tiny-fun in these distressing times and perhaps keep them, moist and humming, in some nifty snap-lock tupperware.

To this end, I'm currently compiling a list of stupid names appearing in the 'From:' or, indeed, the 'To:' field of spam emails I receive in my Yahoo account.

Here, for your fleeting and miniscule pleasure, is the list ten days into this facile project:

Bragado Jansing
Willis Caro
Elza Camidge
Coto Philyaw
Salizar Zadra
Schumer Cerone
Butremovic Pennigton
Shrock Memmott
Omahony Newborn
Salizar Zadra
Ehrmann Grims
Huitt Timmermans

― Michael Jones (MichaelJ), Wednesday, 26 March 2003 09:20 (twenty-two years ago)

Omahony Newborn = greatest name in history of pointing and larfing

― mark s (mark s), Wednesday, 26 March 2003 10:49 (twenty-two years ago)

Omahony Newborn = Old Tyme Music Hall singalong classic.

― Tim (Tim), Wednesday, 26 March 2003 11:03 (twenty-two years ago)

I've been getting mail addressed to "Playboy Bloodbath" for years.

― Douglas (Douglas), Wednesday, 26 March 2003 12:19 (twenty-two years ago)

Oops, sorry about that, Douglas. I knew I had the right building - could you pop it through next door?

― Michael Jones (MichaelJ), Wednesday, 26 March 2003 12:24 (twenty-two years ago)

I got something from Bud Dutton today. (Which is a Spoonerism for Dud Button, oddly enough...)

It was for 'Valium - Viagra - Xanax - Ambien - Zoloft - Ativan' -- I'm obviously making a big order for all of the above later today.

― ChristineSH (chrissie1068), Wednesday, 26 March 2003 15:50 (twenty-two years ago)

I've been collecting them too. Preston Fink is my favourite so far.

― Matt (Matt), Wednesday, 26 March 2003 16:33 (twenty-two years ago)

simon stovell thinks i'd do well to embiggen my penis

― mark p (Mark P), Wednesday, 26 March 2003 16:40 (twenty-two years ago)

What a great thread. My old AOL account (my sister still uses AOL) is like a massive repository for spam. This is just the past 3 days...

Emilia Eastman
Helen Steinle
Helen Villmer
Brad Neconie
Kirk Telaneus
Betsy Rossy
Allstott Aletha
Esther Tilly
Tomas Davis
Christopher Noble (how "noble" is it to be selling Phentermine, Viagra and Propecia?)

― Aaron W (Aaron W), Wednesday, 26 March 2003 16:48 (twenty-two years ago)

The funny thing is - my list is unedited. I haven't left out any Pete Smiths or Sue McLeans, every name attached to a spam post subtle enough not to smack straight into my Bulk folder (i.e. not something with lots of HTML graphics and a Cyrillic/Japanese font) is this exotic.

What name generator do they use and were Stephen Fry and Chris Morris consulted on the coding? Is it random syllables from the real name fields of bulletin board postings around the web?

― Michael Jones (MichaelJ), Wednesday, 26 March 2003 17:05 (twenty-two years ago)

kirk telaneus anagram = snakelike rut

― mark p (Mark P), Wednesday, 26 March 2003 17:07 (twenty-two years ago)

Bloody hell, I've only just noticed I got mail from Salizar Zadra twice. They must be real!

― Michael Jones (MichaelJ), Wednesday, 26 March 2003 17:11 (twenty-two years ago)

I just got one from "Ed Jim", which I can only assume is the informal version of "Edward James". Or the result of a random name generator that needs some work.

― Nate Patrin (Nate Patrin), Wednesday, 26 March 2003 17:18 (twenty-two years ago)

Sheehy Barlett
Ermen Gardine
Crofford Dunkle
Housemate Walke
Zelinka Barnett
Ilana Lozinski
Beth Beastie

I especially like Crofford Dunkle.

I'd also like to point out this latest sales 'trick':

From: knvienickdastoor
Subject: Re:Don't tell nickdastoor.Come see this site

― N. (nickdastoor), Wednesday, 26 March 2003 18:50 (twenty-two years ago)

Housemate Walke! Oh, marvellous.

Today's new addition ("Collect Huge With Our Trouble-Free Online Gambling"): Corolis Grantland.

― Michael Jones (MichaelJ), Wednesday, 26 March 2003 21:13 (twenty-two years ago)

I've just counted and I have 102 e-mails from Vibha Jackson. GOD DAMN YOU VIBHA JACKSON

― Curt1s St3ph3ns, Thursday, 27 March 2003 00:32 (twenty-two years ago)

There's also an e-mail concerning my membership to "Perfect Offers"

― Curt1s St3ph3ns, Thursday, 27 March 2003 00:33 (twenty-two years ago)

Wamp Larwill
Hung Diggs
Melody Speed

― Paul Eater (eater), Thursday, 27 March 2003 07:39 (twenty-two years ago)

Butremovic Pennigton

hmmm -- Slavic-sounding first name, english-sounding last name.

could be a relative of mine!

― Tad (llamasfur), Thursday, 27 March 2003 08:56 (twenty-two years ago)

Today's new best friend (hawking University Diplomas): Prich Hibberd.

Is that 'ch' as in 'Loch'?

― Michael Jones (MichaelJ), Thursday, 27 March 2003 09:14 (twenty-two years ago)

Raising my hopes of Added Profession Options With A Wealthy Prospect are:

Baseler Kudasik and Serres Blewitt.

― Michael Jones (MichaelJ), Thursday, 27 March 2003 13:46 (twenty-two years ago)

Laci Genesao and Tiffaney Quek - bukkake and body fat reduction.

I'm getting bored with this now.

― Michael Jones (MichaelJ), Thursday, 27 March 2003 22:28 (twenty-two years ago)

ian graham just casually inquired as to whether or not i'd like to be hung like a horse

― mark p (Mark P), Friday, 28 March 2003 05:18 (twenty-two years ago)

ah that ian, what a wag

― electric sound of jim (electricsound), Friday, 28 March 2003 05:19 (twenty-two years ago)

seriously though: does anyone know of effective anti-spam programs for microsoft outlook? ideally i'd like something that does more than just filter.

― mark p (Mark P), Friday, 28 March 2003 05:21 (twenty-two years ago)

Tyler Hynyke
Sandy Swain
Atlas Courtney ("Septic Tanks — What You Need to Understand")

― mark s (mark s), Friday, 28 March 2003 18:16 (twenty-two years ago)

ideally i'd like something that does more than just filter.

What do you want it to do, make a citizen's arrest on the sender?

― N. (nickdastoor), Friday, 28 March 2003 18:19 (twenty-two years ago)

aren't there fancy ones that send back messages what fake the receiver into thinking you don't exist? that'd be fab.

― mark p (Mark P), Friday, 28 March 2003 18:21 (twenty-two years ago)

My mailup.net account can do that.

More generally, I think Bayesian filtering is the new thing. And I believe there is a beta version of a plugin called Spammunition that works with Outlook. See here for an approval.

― N. (nickdastoor), Friday, 28 March 2003 18:24 (twenty-two years ago)

haha at work we decided to invent an email that delviers a MASSIVE JOLT OF ELECTRICITY to s/he who opens it (good for late delivery of ad copy especially)

then we remembered this thread: the WRONG HANDS!!

― mark s (mark s), Friday, 28 March 2003 18:26 (twenty-two years ago)

Atlas Courtney ("Septic Tanks — What You Need to Understand")

I got that too - but from Motter Jarreau.

I think Yahoo is getting smarter as these fellows are beginning to land in the Bulk folder with their alternative character-set brethren.

The end of an era.

― Michael Jones (MichaelJ), Sunday, 30 March 2003 08:58 (twenty-two years ago)

Shrock Memmott!!

― mark s (mark s), Sunday, 30 March 2003 21:24 (twenty-two years ago)

Two belters today - the From: and To: fields in the same mail about free pay-per-view cable telly:

Sosh Muckenthaler
Mostowy Deaderick

If I see Mossie, I must let him know Mucko's got this scam going.

― Michael Jones (MichaelJ), Monday, 31 March 2003 06:43 (twenty-two years ago)

Christopher Noble (how "noble" is it to be selling Phentermine, Viagra and Propecia?)

VERY.

― Lara (Lara), Monday, 31 March 2003 09:15 (twenty-two years ago)

I don't seem to be getting any of the good ones. The most recent ones have been:

Absalom Bejar
William O. Riley
Eldon Biage
Luis Drurys
Diamond Jim

A chap called Nick keeps sending me mails about Viagara and other penile enhancement techniques. And I've received two mails from Saint Andrews, who are slyly trying to sell me a wedding.

"From : Saint Andrews
To :
Subject : Wedding

Dear Lara
You made an inquiry about a wedding at St Andrew's. Did you want to proceed with that wedding here?
Nick Spezer"

Now all I need to organise is a hairdresser, shoes and, oh yes, someone I'd like to share more than a couple of months of my life with!

― Lara (Lara), Monday, 31 March 2003 09:49 (twenty-two years ago)

from the cheap humour dept: "time to grow that schlong" received this morning from one aaron r. cox

― mark p (Mark P), Monday, 31 March 2003 12:38 (twenty-two years ago)

Shawnece Nicesnatch" | This is spam | Add to Address Book
To: gygax0r@y@h00.c0m
Subject: Oh no, I lost my panties again - Finger me please?

― gygax! (gygax!), Tuesday, 1 April 2003 03:27 (twenty-two years ago)

"Las Vegas A Bit Overly Expensive?" asks Malich Bringman of Khuu Jecmenek. I don't expect Khuu to reply - he's such a stickler for grammar.

― Michael Jones (MichaelJ), Tuesday, 1 April 2003 06:30 (twenty-two years ago)

I'm going to keep this going until the end of the war.

Breach Mcredmond gives Elliston Deibert the cable filter info he requested and I somehow get in the way.

― Michael Jones (MichaelJ), Wednesday, 2 April 2003 06:44 (twenty-two years ago)

Brooke P. Stevens wants me to reduce body fat and build muscle.
Georgia Spears is offering me software to copy my DVDs
Larisa Coleman is offering me cheap generic viagra
Giselle Chisholm sez "Get into that summer look"
Samara Papp offers me to "return to my youth"
Gail Guevara will remove the obstacles that cause adults to abandon hope and sell me bogus university degrees and fake academic transcripts
Ramiro Randolph knows why his son stays out on weekends

― Chris Barrus (Chris Barrus), Wednesday, 2 April 2003 07:29 (twenty-two years ago)

One more... Tony (real last name unknown) just emailed me to let me know that I can purchase secret documents proving that aliens have been visiting the earth and have a secret Antarctic base.

― Chris Barrus (Chris Barrus), Wednesday, 2 April 2003 07:31 (twenty-two years ago)

I'm gonna change my name to Aaron R. Cox!

Today, Hank Deselm wrote to ask "What's Up?" and to see if I wanted to visit his webpage. Nice of him!

― Aaron W (Aaron W), Wednesday, 2 April 2003 14:41 (twenty-two years ago)

Barton Luckenbach offered to help me with guaranteed dating. Indeed.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Wednesday, 2 April 2003 15:07 (twenty-two years ago)

Mostowy Deaderick is a wonderful name, in a way I'm glad I'm already married or else I would just wait around until the day I met a Mostowy Deaderick.

― Nicole (Nicole), Wednesday, 2 April 2003 15:22 (twenty-two years ago)

But if you took the name Nicole Deaderick your initials would be N.D.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Wednesday, 2 April 2003 15:27 (twenty-two years ago)

"Hung Diggs"

I am going to the town hall and changing my name to this right after work today.

― Chris V. (Chris V), Wednesday, 2 April 2003 15:29 (twenty-two years ago)

Ned, you had to go there, didn't you? Talk about ruining my fantasies of perfect happiness!

You are definitely not worthy of the name Mostowy.

― Nicole (Nicole), Wednesday, 2 April 2003 15:30 (twenty-two years ago)

Today (yes, I am picking just the best of many in my spambin):

Autumn Minetola
Pansy Pearl
Gay Cross
Wang Gory
Perdy Mutia
Fred Wicaclya
Lacher Pulse
Funck Crayford (twice)

― Paul Eater (eater), Wednesday, 2 April 2003 16:12 (twenty-two years ago)

You are definitely not worthy of the name Mostowy.

*weeps tears of shame*

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Wednesday, 2 April 2003 16:38 (twenty-two years ago)

Yahoo mail is SO STUPID. I get mail in my regular inbox from "dzqelky qmzoikl" and I get "dartmouth admissions office" in my BULK MAIL, which i usually delete without reading! (they didn't send an admission, just said when the mail goes out. but stupid, stupid yahoo.)

― Maria (Maria), Thursday, 3 April 2003 01:02 (twenty-two years ago)

"the mario bros."

― jess (dubplatestyle), Thursday, 3 April 2003 01:16 (twenty-two years ago)

Michael Jones, you've got me hooked!

Kneisley Butkiewicz
Whelton Petzel
Mccuistion Trojak

― Paul Eater (eater), Thursday, 3 April 2003 04:39 (twenty-two years ago)

Some of yours are outstanding, Paul. I don't seem to get the ones that would look good on a paperback cover - Gay Cross and Pansy Pearl f'instance.

Today, while I slept, Jarva Charvat and Kilpatrick Eagy were keen for me to lose weight - while I slept.

― Michael Jones (MichaelJ), Thursday, 3 April 2003 06:28 (twenty-two years ago)

I can lose weight and, yet, *gain muscle* while I sleep if I heed the advice of Amabile Boggi and Ruhland Reisser.

― Michael Jones (MichaelJ), Thursday, 3 April 2003 11:55 (twenty-two years ago)

Five years at college were clearly wasted when Flumerfelt Scammon and Callez Eatherly could simply have sent me a University diploma (even a PhD!).

― Michael Jones (MichaelJ), Friday, 4 April 2003 08:36 (twenty-two years ago)

Flumerfelt! Now that's poetry.

― Nicole (Nicole), Friday, 4 April 2003 11:44 (twenty-two years ago)

a.Ann mucaumyl 
Oretha Ficken 
janellanel 
jenny lips 
andres marks 
Trinity Neurohr 
Bob Agatha
gary nixon 
pearl caldwell 
Mr. Pencil 
carroll hurst 
Tyra Applemans 

― rosemary (rosemary), Friday, 4 April 2003 13:25 (twenty-two years ago)

Okay, who also got the spam from "Saddam Hussan 1"? From "voila.fr" and in an adorable French accent.

― Kerry (dymaxia), Friday, 4 April 2003 14:31 (twenty-two years ago)

Preskitt Lawson and Amoroso Laible are also wise to the idea that Uni degrees are worth the paper they're written on, but no more than that.

― Michael Jones (MichaelJ), Friday, 4 April 2003 15:01 (twenty-two years ago)

Demetria Ouellette is trying to sell me viagra
Prosko Lenn thinks i shd have my own internet casino

― mark s (mark s), Friday, 4 April 2003 16:32 (twenty-two years ago)

Does anyone notice spam subject titles getting increasingly dada? Anna Skaggs (!!) just offered me some prescription-free Xanax using the header "iruit butt".

― mark p (Mark P), Friday, 4 April 2003 16:35 (twenty-two years ago)

Does anyone notice spam subject titles getting increasingly dada?

Or just bounced through Babelfish: "To acceptably uphold septic tanks" - Nobel Mani and Seed Watton.

― Michael Jones (MichaelJ), Saturday, 5 April 2003 06:27 (twenty-two years ago)

Another bleedin' University diploma offer: Gatewood Heising and Northam Waychoff.

Another bleedin' weight loss solution: Eclarinal Fitzgerrel and Jared Barkdull.

Another bleedin' University diploma offer: Corrow Mcmenamy* and Pipkin Levanger.

(* - email address: Latourrette@email.com)

― Michael Jones (MichaelJ), Sunday, 6 April 2003 11:55 (twenty-two years ago)

Michael what have you done that yr spam names are so *consistently* better than anyone else's?!!?

the four i've posted are WAY the bst i've had and none of them match yr most mediocre?

are you sure this is not some oulipian faux-spam prank of the nipper's?

― mark s (mark s), Sunday, 6 April 2003 12:05 (twenty-two years ago)

Chittam Burkle has some great advice on how to perfectly preserve septic tanks (034)
Weuve Hosek knows how to twofold my chest size rapidly (7V)
Nakamatsu Pink has Grand university degree proposition for everybody! (giwpv)
Vejar Salvatore wonders how a career with more capital sounds (44c46Ur4)

These all got through my Yahoo mail filters in the last 24 hours. I don't know what thost codes in brackets signify.

― N. (nickdastoor), Sunday, 6 April 2003 12:11 (twenty-two years ago)

why would anyone *want* to perfectly preserve a septic tank?

― mark s (mark s), Sunday, 6 April 2003 12:58 (twenty-two years ago)

There are more things in heaven and earth than are dreamt of in your philosophy, mark s.

― N. (nickdastoor), Sunday, 6 April 2003 13:56 (twenty-two years ago)

I couldn't tell what she was selling from the header (probably Herbalife), and I didn't want to open the e-mail, but I tell you that I was this close to buying anything from someone named "Lavonia Sugar".

― Nate Patrin (Nate Patrin), Sunday, 6 April 2003 15:16 (twenty-two years ago)

(Then again, given the Tennessee Williams nature of her name, maybe not anything.)

― Nate Patrin (Nate Patrin), Sunday, 6 April 2003 15:17 (twenty-two years ago)

I got one from Erik B entitled "Welcome Home Sweety E"

― jel -- (jel), Sunday, 6 April 2003 17:14 (twenty-two years ago)

Subject: "Lets be friends!" From: "secret_asshole"

― Curt1s St3ph3ns, Sunday, 6 April 2003 17:50 (twenty-two years ago)

Michael what have you done that yr spam names are so *consistently* better than anyone else's?!!?

I can only suspect that this scattergun spamming actually has a highly polished seed of Market Research at its core; I'm getting all the good ones (I'm not sure that's true, actually - Lara, Rosemary, Paul and Nick have some smack-faced nuggets) because They know I have some small facility for this myself and I get a bang out of it.

And I need a septic tank and an MSc.

No mail today :(

― Michael Jones (MichaelJ), Monday, 7 April 2003 09:36 (twenty-two years ago)

Staunton Attal and Cerce Rosson are the latest pair to absolutely insist that I wake up lighter.

Delilah Minus and Mehan Salotti are offering me $310 of chips at their online casino.

― Michael Jones (MichaelJ), Tuesday, 8 April 2003 07:21 (twenty-two years ago)

I think mine are getting up to speed w.yrs Mike: Tabatha Daughdrill and Cassara Goehring

― mark s (mark s), Tuesday, 8 April 2003 13:20 (twenty-two years ago)

Braulio Kubly needs to chat with me about my septic tank.

― Aaron W (Aaron W), Tuesday, 8 April 2003 13:37 (twenty-two years ago)

Mahalia Luana wants to adress my refinancing needs.
OneBigOne promises "Superior Penile Shaftosis".

― JuliaA (j_bdules), Tuesday, 8 April 2003 18:03 (twenty-two years ago)

Yes, Mark, the distribution of ludicrousity is beginning to settle down. The only new ones in the last 24 hours are the fairly uninspired So Linne and Gifford Harelson ("Obtain the qualification without wasting the funds").

― Michael Jones (MichaelJ), Wednesday, 9 April 2003 11:21 (twenty-two years ago)

A Catherine Redmond has told me quite boldly:

Subject: I can wait to see you at work again.

Well then.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Wednesday, 9 April 2003 19:25 (twenty-two years ago)

At least Catherine sounds quite pleasant, and moderately intriguing (even).

On the other hand, OpJXu1@yahoo.com tells me I should no longer be embarrassed by visits to the doctor (for some unknown reason)

― C J (C J), Wednesday, 9 April 2003 19:36 (twenty-two years ago)

Dr. Wang Chinly

(i am not making this up)

― jess (dubplatestyle), Wednesday, 9 April 2003 19:37 (twenty-two years ago)

I would be embarrassed to see Dr Wang Chinly, obv.

― C J (C J), Wednesday, 9 April 2003 19:40 (twenty-two years ago)

Perhaps my last contribution to this thread, as I did suggest I would stop once we'd got out of the habit of bunkerbusting suburban restaurants and shelling journalists, and I *think* that bit's over, so:

Tynio Kromer and Veteto Panis

...with some diet thing or other.

― Michael Jones (MichaelJ), Thursday, 10 April 2003 08:53 (twenty-two years ago)

Not ludicrous names, but when expecting an email from my cousin Pam yesterday, I got a porn spam from a Pam (no more than that), then again yesterday I got one from someone with a forename identical to an old friend, and a surname with just one added, silent letter - also porn. And just now, another porn one from 'Anna', sadly not our Ms F. These people are at least making me look at the email.

― Martin Skidmore (Martin Skidmore), Thursday, 10 April 2003 19:35 (twenty-two years ago)

Woodrow Baez

― Jody Beth Rosen (Jody Beth Rosen), Monday, 14 April 2003 15:25 (twenty-two years ago)

That Catherine Redmond is pretty good at thinly veiled insults!

― Nicole (Nicole), Monday, 14 April 2003 15:27 (twenty-two years ago)

I got spam saying just "Let's be friends" from the improbably named tracer hand today!

― Andrew Farrell (afarrell), Monday, 14 April 2003 15:50 (twenty-two years ago)

Spam "sender" connections:

Mary
Garth

― Jody Beth Rosen (Jody Beth Rosen), Monday, 14 April 2003 15:59 (twenty-two years ago)

in the last few days I've started to get these kind of weird composite names:
Tbaltimora Vbaltimore
Lattestant Rattestations
Uantispastic Qantisplasher

― Poppy (poppy), Monday, 14 April 2003 23:59 (twenty-two years ago)

STRICTLY AND CONFIDENTIAL,

I am MR PUFFIN DANIEL the director in charge of
auditing and account section UNION TOGOLAISE DE
BANQUE,LOME-TOGO.With due respect and regard,I have
decided to contact you on a business transaction that
will be very beneficial to both of us at the end....

― mark s (mark s), Thursday, 17 April 2003 18:12 (twenty-two years ago)

Hi there sweetie!!
I hope you still remember me I know its been a while since we chatted last!

Those couple nights we cybered had me soooo wet!

I have never beeb dripping down my legs like fom just some hot chat!

― mark p (Mark P), Thursday, 17 April 2003 18:14 (twenty-two years ago)

Edwardo Person

― Jody Beth Rosen (Jody Beth Rosen), Friday, 18 April 2003 18:26 (twenty-two years ago)

I just got one from Alex (don't know where this Alex is based, which is odd, as they usually say) with the subject line "My name is Gabriella", which is an odd combination.

― Martin Skidmore (Martin Skidmore), Monday, 21 April 2003 16:07 (twenty-two years ago)

"Diana D. Perry" d.dp3rry@b3lls0uth.n3t

Subject : 
Become an addict!

Gainpro will take your sex life to new levels... Guaranteed!
Your penis will grow up to 3 inches
Your erections will be rock hard
Your sex drive will be supercharged
Your orgasms will be more intense
Your partner will be astounded

Is there anything you'd like to say to us, Dang?

― Leee (Leee), Thursday, 24 April 2003 23:59 (twenty-two years ago)

Who knows more about such things than D Perry?

― Martin Skidmore (Martin Skidmore), Friday, 25 April 2003 10:58 (twenty-two years ago)

this guy does: yr host for the evening, it's Bartillerymen Partily

!!

An interim winner surely?

― mark s (mark s), Friday, 25 April 2003 11:04 (twenty-two years ago)

I think it's between Tbaltimora Vbaltimore and yr man Partily.

Let's write back to them and see what they think.

― Michael Jones (MichaelJ), Friday, 25 April 2003 12:36 (twenty-two years ago)

Qaphthitalite Aaphthoid!!

― mark s (mark s), Tuesday, 6 May 2003 23:14 (twenty-two years ago)

That's a bit too Douglas Adams, Mark. Anyway, I went to school with Qaph's sister, Zviviqossaliss.

I'm afraid I delete all the INVALID_ADDRESS@SYNTAX_ERROR mails from Yahoo now without even checking the 'real' names. I wish I could get back that early rush of joy but it's gone. Like a cheap watch. (?)

― Michael Jones (MichaelJ), Wednesday, 7 May 2003 08:29 (twenty-two years ago)

i am beating a dead horse w. too big a spoon :(

― mark s (mark s), Wednesday, 7 May 2003 10:25 (twenty-two years ago)

I once registered for a website under the name "Raekwon The Chef" so I often get emails with the subject heading: "Mr. Chef, have you considered our $100,000 life insurance policy?" or "Oh Raekwon! Click here and jizz on my tits!"

― phil-two (phil-two), Thursday, 8 May 2003 06:12 (twenty-two years ago)

Lupe I. Stover would like very much for me to get larger balls (!?) and penís, more pleasure, more satisfaction

― mark p (Mark P), Thursday, 8 May 2003 22:45 (twenty-two years ago)

Some new winners that my coworker Tom got regarding Russian mail-order brides:

Cowett Curcuru
Skinnen Krawchuk
Akiereisen Shilo
Swanton Langen

Though that last one could be the name of one of those pretenders being talked about.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Wednesday, 14 May 2003 15:37 (twenty-two years ago)

Kevin Shields

― bnw (bnw), Monday, 19 May 2003 01:54 (twenty-two years ago)

what was he selling? old rope?

― electric sound of jim (electricsound), Monday, 19 May 2003 01:57 (twenty-two years ago)

There's a hardened warrior roaming Starcraft and Diablo
who goes by Captain Poopypants. Never fails to crack me up.

― Squirrel_Police (Squirrel_Police), Monday, 19 May 2003 02:04 (twenty-two years ago)

i got spam from 'duane'!

― minna (minna), Monday, 19 May 2003 13:49 (twenty-two years ago)

two weeks pass...
Today I got a spam message (advertising growth hormone) with the subject "Joshua is so sugary that I am transforming the belly dance."

Doubtless this is an attempt to bypass statistical filtering methods. See also "desitkami cieantque wai zerkratzenden," and "planter juntorio pitch into" from Chase Collazo.

― Paul Eater (eater), Tuesday, 3 June 2003 23:19 (twenty-two years ago)

It's worth a full REVIVE just for that, Paul.

New sub-thread: ridiculous subject headings.

― Michael Jones (MichaelJ), Wednesday, 4 June 2003 07:20 (twenty-two years ago)

this one makes me smile, at least: HIT PEOPLE WITH YOUR DICK
(*sorry*)

― joan vich (joan vich), Wednesday, 4 June 2003 16:54 (twenty-two years ago)

Today:

"tallassassee bacsspace"

"fmode PEPTIC" from Emile Toadvine

"dieghterr marthroitte"

"bruikbare Error-End Einlasses"

"SEVEN SIMONS viskiyhti coquiller"

"raelway emisaivity"

And, from our very own Lara Byrne, "monkilove".

― Paul Eater (eater), Wednesday, 4 June 2003 17:03 (twenty-two years ago)

And, from our very own Lara Byrne, "monkilove".

Darling, that one isn't for sharing.

???

― Lara (Lara), Thursday, 5 June 2003 19:02 (twenty-two years ago)

We'll talk about it later.

Today:

"thag'll ape a nice girl!"

― Paul Eater (eater), Friday, 6 June 2003 23:01 (twenty-two years ago)

"Mark, seek of spam?"

― mark s (mark s), Sunday, 8 June 2003 13:54 (twenty-two years ago)

Brain Dougherty
Shaughnessy Herron
Kawfully Zawfulness

― Andrew Farrell (afarrell), Monday, 9 June 2003 08:39 (twenty-two years ago)

Jacques Couture, Fashionista.
Fletcher Vinson, Pet Detective.
Keri Ferreira, Publicist.
Vappercipient Fapperson, Deacon, Archdiocese of Baltimore.
Aubrey Teed, Belle and Sebastian fan.

― daria g, Monday, 9 June 2003 12:52 (twenty-two years ago)

SHOCKINGNEWS@GUARENTEEDLOVE.COM


― Jon Williams (ex machina), Monday, 9 June 2003 12:55 (twenty-two years ago)

It's like a daily quiz show with the wacky e-mail names over here: Grad student or spammer?

― daria g, Monday, 9 June 2003 20:42 (twenty-two years ago)

A Uukkivi

― g--ff c-nn-n (gcannon), Tuesday, 10 June 2003 18:10 (twenty-two years ago)

jenny89@yourgoo.com

― Jody Beth Rosen (Jody Beth Rosen), Tuesday, 10 June 2003 22:51 (twenty-two years ago)

"octoser phimble"

― Andrew Farrell (afarrell), Friday, 13 June 2003 08:20 (twenty-two years ago)

Re: this will make it grow arithmetic

― mark s (mark s), Monday, 16 June 2003 15:55 (twenty-two years ago)

Re: make your knob fat for her circlet

― Andrew Farrell (afarrell), Monday, 16 June 2003 18:00 (twenty-two years ago)

Israel McDonald

― Andrew Farrell (afarrell), Monday, 23 June 2003 23:01 (twenty-two years ago)

Okay, this game isn't boring for me yet.

Sheelah Wheeler
Dee Lee
Corenda Jeckyll
Hayley Unixsupport
Yolanthe Evers
Grissel Paguirigan
Anstice Rudge
Fania Katrice
Hesther Own
Lanny Quinton
Zelma Cyb
Nita Fosh
Gabbey Von
Leyva Pilling
Kellia L. Greatrix
cat_princess_of_the_stars@hotmail.com
and Curly Dragon, re: esingapore frottant Kardinalskollegien

― Paul Eater (eater), Monday, 7 July 2003 20:43 (twenty-two years ago)

Hung Viscia

― Paul Eater (eater), Friday, 18 July 2003 16:05 (twenty-two years ago)

"Hi voluptuous Andrew!"

― Andrew Farrell (afarrell), Tuesday, 22 July 2003 08:45 (twenty-two years ago)

This morning I had 'Jeanie Slaughter'

― Pinkpanther (Pinkpanther), Tuesday, 22 July 2003 08:50 (twenty-two years ago)

Donald Maldonado

― Andrew Farrell (afarrell), Thursday, 24 July 2003 11:29 (twenty-two years ago)

From: ""
To:
Subject: Dimensional Warp
Greetings,
We need a vendor who can offer immediate supply.
I'm offering $5,000 US dollars just for referring a vender which is
(Actually RELIABLE in providing the below equipment) Contact details
of vendor required, including name and phone #. If they turn out to be
reliable in supplying the below equipment I'll immediately pay you
$5,000. We prefer to work with vendor in the Boston/New York area.
1. The mind warper generation 4 Dimensional Warp Generator # 52 4350a
series wrist watch with z80 or better memory adapter. If in stock the
AMD Dimensional Warp Generator module containing the GRC79 induction
motor, two I80200 warp stabilizers, 256GB of SRAM, and two Analog
Devices isolinear modules, This unit also has a menu driven GUI
accessible on the front panel XID display. All in 1 units would be
great if reliable models are available
2. The special 23200 or Acme 5X24 series time transducing capacitor
with built in temporal displacement. Needed with complete
jumper/auxiliary system
3. A reliable crystal Ionizor with unlimited memory backup.
4. I will also pay for Schematics, layouts, and designs directly
from the manufature which can be used to build this equipment
from readily available parts.
If your vendor turns out to be reliable, I owe you $5,000.
Email his details to me at: info@federalfundingprogram.com
Please do not reply directly back to this email as it will
only be bounced back to you.

― Jon Williams (ex machina), Thursday, 24 July 2003 11:52 (twenty-two years ago)

"we want c*ck $FIRSTNAME"

― Andrew Farrell (afarrell), Thursday, 24 July 2003 12:59 (twenty-two years ago)

Dura Verhoeve
Yuzhou Lorello
Toyong Nagelhout
Pingbo Bakevicius

― amateurist (amateurist), Tuesday, 29 July 2003 00:16 (twenty-two years ago)

two weeks pass...
"watch these coeds walk up stairs"

― Andrew Farrell (afarrell), Tuesday, 12 August 2003 21:27 (twenty-two years ago)

two weeks pass...
more nigerian drama!!!!!

From:Mariam Abacha Lagos-Nigeria. Dear Sir, Following the sudden death of my
husband General Sani Abacha the late former head of state of Nigeria in june
1998, I have been thrown into a state of utter confusion, frustration and
hopelessness by the present civilian administration, I have been subjected to
physical and psychological torture by the security agents in the country. My
son was just released from detention two months ago by the Nigerian Government
for an offence he did not commit. As a widow that is so traumatized, I have
lost confidence with anybody within the country. You must have heard over the
media reports and the internet on the recovery of various huge sums of money
deposited by my husband in different security firms abroad, some companies
willingly give up their secrets and disclosed our money confidently lodged
there or many outright blackmail. In fact the total sum discovered by the
Government so far is in the tune of $700. Million dollars. And they are not
relenting to make me poor for life. I got your contacts through my personal
research, and out of desperation decided to reach you through this medium.I
will give you more information as to this regard as soon as you reply. I repose
great confidence in you hence my approach to you due to security network placed
on my day to day affairs I cannot afford to visit the embassy so that is why I
decided to contact you and I hope you will not betray my confidence in you. I
have deposited the sum of 30.000.000 million dollars with a security firm
abroad whose name is witheld for now until we open communication.I shall be
grateful if you could receive this fund into your account for safe keeping.
This arrangement is known to you and my son Ahmed alone, so my son will deal
directly with you as security is up my whole being.I am seriously considering
to settle down abroad in a friendly atmosphere like yours as soon as this fund
get into your account so that I can start all over again if only you wish, but
if it is impossible,just help me in diverting this fund into your account which
will accrue you 30% of this fund. Please honesty is the watch word in this
transaction.I will require your telephone and fax numbers so that we can
commence communication immediately and I will give you a more detailed picture
of things. In case you dont accept please do not let me out to the security as
I am giving you this information in total trust and confidence .I will greatly
appreciate if you accept my proposal in good faith. Please expedite action by
sending your reply to my son email address below. Sincerely Yours, HAJIA MARIAM
ABACHA. PLEASE REPLY VIA THIS EMAIL ADDRESS:: m_abachaa24@hknetmail.com

― mark p (Mark P), Wednesday, 27 August 2003 10:17 (twenty-two years ago)

Full country name: Federal Republic of Nigeria
Area: 924,000 sq km (360,360 sq mi)
Population: 125 million
Capital city: Abuja (pop 378,671)
President: Olusegun Obasanjo
GDP: US$143.5 billion
GDP per head: US$1380
Annual growth: 1.6%
Inflation: 14%
Major industries: sitting around emailing

― mark p (Mark P), Wednesday, 27 August 2003 10:18 (twenty-two years ago)

Lacey Ewing (!)

― Andrew Farrell (afarrell), Monday, 1 September 2003 08:08 (twenty-two years ago)

Bonita Swift

― Chris Barrus (Chris Barrus), Wednesday, 10 September 2003 01:56 (twenty-two years ago)

Rie Kalmykow
Lungfa Savarino
Lilyan Brundritt
Margareta Pillinger

― s1utsky (slutsky), Wednesday, 10 September 2003 02:01 (twenty-two years ago)

Bonita Swift (again)
Marcelino Boone
Napoleon Corona
Evangeline Bacon
Oliver Cartwright
Gayleen Bacon (related to Evangeline?)

― Elvis Telecom (Chris Barrus), Tuesday, 16 September 2003 23:25 (twenty-two years ago)

two weeks pass...
"Saw YOU in church, loved what I saw"

― Andrew Farrell (afarrell), Friday, 3 October 2003 13:54 (twenty-two years ago)

i just got a viagra spam of which the subjectline wz "churchmen ambuscade"

― mark s (mark s), Tuesday, 7 October 2003 20:57 (twenty-two years ago)

I have deposited the sum of 30.000.000 million dollars with a security firm
abroad whose name is witheld for now until we open communication.

Isn't that more than the entire Earth GDP?

― N. (nickdastoor), Tuesday, 7 October 2003 23:03 (twenty-two years ago)

[simple probability theory would suggest you'd be a fool not to follow it up, mark!]

― N. (nickdastoor), Tuesday, 7 October 2003 23:04 (twenty-two years ago)

getabiggerwang5 getabiggerwang5 getabiggerwang5 getabiggerwang5 getabiggerwang5 getabiggerwang5 getabiggerwang5 getabiggerwang5 getabiggerwang5 getabiggerwang5 getabiggerwang5 getabiggerwang5 getabiggerwang5 getabiggerwang5 getabiggerwang5 getabiggerwang5 getabiggerwang5 getabiggerwang5 getabiggerwang5 getabiggerwang5

― Kim (Kim), Wednesday, 8 October 2003 00:59 (twenty-two years ago)

it's almost poetic isn't it?

― Kim (Kim), Wednesday, 8 October 2003 01:00 (twenty-two years ago)

This isn't really a spam name but Spencer showed it to me and quite frankly it's ridiculous.

― Ally (mlescaut), Wednesday, 8 October 2003 01:04 (twenty-two years ago)

Thurman Mirtly
Hubert Castro

― Annouschka Magnatech (Jody Beth Rosen), Wednesday, 8 October 2003 17:21 (twenty-two years ago)

four weeks pass...
From: "Archbishop M. Enervate"
Subject: ax Bored, Lonely,z Housewives Need Your Attention

― teeny (teeny), Friday, 7 November 2003 20:48 (twenty-two years ago)

jungsuck pennyfather!!

― typo acapulco (gcannon), Saturday, 8 November 2003 22:05 (twenty-two years ago)

One for old times sake:

Grownup Q. Hear

Wow.

― Michael Jones (MichaelJ), Monday, 10 November 2003 20:05 (twenty-two years ago)

Syrous Cheinis
Lenna Lyavala
Eurick Stinellis

― Marcel Post (Marcel Post), Monday, 10 November 2003 20:47 (twenty-two years ago)

Provedor de Hospedagem

― ethereal cereal (Jody Beth Rosen), Saturday, 15 November 2003 19:02 (twenty-two years ago)

Okoth Lupe

― ethereal cereal (Jody Beth Rosen), Saturday, 15 November 2003 19:03 (twenty-two years ago)

Naughty B. Bugbears!

― Paul Eater (eater), Sunday, 16 November 2003 07:27 (twenty-two years ago)

Mollie T. Unsuited

text =

"Huge Steroid Cocks & Tight Pussies"

"huge steroid cocks"!!!! wtf???

― Pashmina (Pashmina), Sunday, 16 November 2003 10:42 (twenty-two years ago)

Motorola B. Zealots

― mark s (mark s), Sunday, 16 November 2003 12:00 (twenty-two years ago)

Don't know about spam names, but my personal best header was something to the effect of:

My weight was smothering medfhstwgh

― Simon H., Sunday, 16 November 2003 13:02 (twenty-two years ago)

Creepiness H. Taxes

― ethereal cereal (Jody Beth Rosen), Tuesday, 18 November 2003 23:24 (twenty-two years ago)

Yong Hopkins wrote to me twice this morning.

― Markelby (Mark C), Wednesday, 19 November 2003 13:49 (twenty-two years ago)

not the name this time, but the subject line:

menstruate hounding scoffer

?????

Perhaps the text of the email will enlighten me:

crawlers midwinter brawl identity humblest iii creamer theatrical illimitable polka taxicabs
existentialism tactual adoption mesenteric potentiality cost hopple pompano excerpted
acquaintance hoses exalts eukaryote admixed antietam crescent

bookkeeping excision talisman scallop scholarships aces exorcism scar pointed exacerbating
talker bothering hotelman savory humorous plum pour possessively terraces blurting adjourn
scandalous adjudicating

Oh well......

― Pashmina (Pashmina), Wednesday, 19 November 2003 20:01 (twenty-two years ago)

Orlando Crump

― disco donut (Jody Beth Rosen), Friday, 21 November 2003 01:58 (twenty-two years ago)

Droplets P. Norms

― disco donut (Jody Beth Rosen), Friday, 21 November 2003 01:59 (twenty-two years ago)

suvinder grenfell

― disco donut (Jody Beth Rosen), Friday, 21 November 2003 02:38 (twenty-two years ago)

i think this one gets the gold medal:

Failed V. Dope

― bad jode (Jody Beth Rosen), Tuesday, 25 November 2003 17:35 (twenty-two years ago)

Over the past WEEKEND, spam has come in from Jack Wagner, Richard Dawson, and Raymond Scott!

― bad jode (Jody Beth Rosen), Sunday, 30 November 2003 22:13 (twenty-two years ago)

I keep seeing the first name and thinking it's someone I know, and then realising that Deanna here is unlikely to be writing to me (real example from this morning) about penis enlargement. Sorry if that was a real one, Dee!

― Martin Skidmore (Martin Skidmore), Sunday, 30 November 2003 22:43 (twenty-two years ago)

i got one today from:

"ice sang with an awe of its own, the wonder that the truth could feel so good. "I know..." "Here," he said, handing her the phone, "talk to my daughter while I hook another line up to the conference p her means."

subject

n Doc is in vbpp

uh huh!
 

― jed (jed_e_3), Monday, 1 December 2003 03:59 (twenty-two years ago)

I've just re-read this thread, tears streaming down my face. My favourite up to now is Uantispastic Qantisplasher, for the sheer playground geek factx0r. "No, YOU'RE an Antispastic Qantisplasher, and so's your mum!"

Today's mail, which I stupidly deleted, Came from a chap with the 1st name of Thievery. How uncharacteristically honest!

― Markelby (Mark C), Thursday, 11 December 2003 10:15 (twenty-two years ago)

Found it! THIEVERY H. TROUBADOR

― Markelby (Mark C), Thursday, 11 December 2003 10:24 (twenty-two years ago)

There's a lot of these 'name initial name' format senders going around at the moment.

Goal U. Purify
Nerd E. Repercussion
Moating H. Tempts
Metaphorically K. Overworked
Exquisitely R. Sufi
Receivership U. Parodies

I'm waiting for Jesus H. Christ to come up.

― Alfie K Overworked (Alfie), Thursday, 11 December 2003 11:29 (twenty-two years ago)

I got a mail from a Mr Hunter Butts the other day.

― DV (dirtyvicar), Friday, 12 December 2003 23:49 (twenty-two years ago)

I wonder how much junk mail goes to the following address:

Charles Xavier
6606 Greymalkin Lane
Basement Laboratory
Salem Center, NY 10016

and how much goes to this email address:
chromedome@secretHQ.org

― Lord Custos Omicron (Lord Custos Omicron), Saturday, 13 December 2003 00:28 (twenty-two years ago)

I got one from Discoed H. Deviation today.

!!! Priceless.

I also got informed, David Attenborough style, that Deep in Canada barren North, lives an a.n.i.m.a.l scientists believe to be the most prolific lover in the entire a.n.i.m.a.l kingdom. During the Fall rutting apfxxve kxnyobsta pxzoqlupit lfofkutd aaediuk
season, the male Wapiti Elk (cervus elaphus) amasses a hormonal structure that allows him to experience multiple s.e.x.u.a.| 0_r_g_a_s_m_s within three minutes apart and up to 20 times per day!

Well good for them!

― Trayce (trayce), Sunday, 14 December 2003 06:01 (twenty-two years ago)

These middle initial names are pretty amusing. Just now I got:

Enumerations K. Magellan and
Mezzanine T. Apertures

The ensuing email was quite bizarre too:

Oxford, the paradise of dead philosophies.

who is the hot ass on the picture ?

starts with a P...

http://[yeah link whatever]

Khuda hafiz

Ambition never comes to an end.

Whats the point of spam if you can't even work out what, if anything, it is selling anymore? I'm confused.

― Trayce (trayce), Monday, 15 December 2003 06:12 (twenty-two years ago)

Two entries this morning. My home email, which almost never gets spam, received an email offering me to experiecne "Fab ulous d.iet typhoid"

More homespun was the three successive emails received at work from Dorothy, Betty, and Augustine.

― Markelby (Mark C), Monday, 15 December 2003 10:25 (twenty-two years ago)

"Personalized Stockings are a must for your pet this holiday season"

― Markelby (Mark C), Monday, 15 December 2003 11:30 (twenty-two years ago)

Carboloy A. Renunciation

― oh my (neil simpson), Friday, 19 December 2003 10:10 (twenty-one years ago)

I'm keeping a list of these now.

Partition I. Hispanics
Outstretching S. Pugilism
Sweepstake C. Tenths
Indomitably U. Subscribe
Lamentable D. Tenderizer
Lumpish S. Eigenvalue
William G. Stewart
Firmament Q. Meadowlarks
Enthroning A. Mortimer
Dictators Q. Spectroscope
Cuzco C. Backlogging
Cohabiting R. Ornithologist

― Alfie (Alfie), Friday, 19 December 2003 10:25 (twenty-one years ago)

I am thinking of changing my name, thanks to spam!

― Disco H Deviation (trayce), Friday, 19 December 2003 10:30 (twenty-one years ago)

Oh I just got the best one ever! Debonair P. Slackness !!!

― Kim (Kim), Saturday, 20 December 2003 19:13 (twenty-one years ago)

Does anyone mind if I use each and every one of these names in a surrealist 19th century satirical novel that I'll

Enter two puritans, Firmament is played by Stephen Patrick Morrissey and Enthroning is played by Jonathan Pryce.
Firmament Q. Meadowlarks: I say, we should declare them all to be witches and then burn them.
Enthroning A. Mortimer: (clucks tongue) That would take too long. Witch trials are so long and dreary. Why can't we just burn them first and try them later.
Firmament Q. Meadowlarks: Excellent idea!
Exuent two puritans

― Lord Custos Omicron (Lord Custos Omicron), Saturday, 20 December 2003 22:17 (twenty-one years ago)

Mary Kidd emailed me this morning. The subject of her email was "countersunk crowbait boot polymorph". Which was nice.

― Markelby (Mark C), Friday, 2 January 2004 10:19 (twenty-one years ago)

subject: "we remove the obstacles that cause adults to abandon hope"

university degree spammers have gotten so emo!!

― mark p (Mark P), Friday, 2 January 2004 17:46 (twenty-one years ago)

Meredith O. Nonfiction

― Huckleberry Mann (Horace Mann), Monday, 5 January 2004 17:52 (twenty-one years ago)


Cheeseburger T.
Scoreboard

― Huckleberry Mann (Horace Mann), Monday, 5 January 2004 20:39 (twenty-one years ago)

Eleven S. Degradation

― Luigi Vampa (Horace Mann), Tuesday, 13 January 2004 19:27 (twenty-one years ago)

For some reason I've been getting spam emails addressed in the email text to Emilymv but at my email address.

― nickalicious (nickalicious), Tuesday, 13 January 2004 19:59 (twenty-one years ago)

Gutsy E. Rodriguez

― america's first municipal lunatic asylum (Jody Beth Rosen), Thursday, 15 January 2004 18:52 (twenty-one years ago)

I just got a message urging me to "Give her something covered with flaming fat". This sounds like a wise suggestion but Numbers Huggins doesn't really explain how to proceed.

― Paul Eater (eater), Saturday, 24 January 2004 05:40 (twenty-one years ago)

From: Joey Santiago
Re: Important gaylord


I don't know what the former Pixies guitarist is trying to tell me...

― Huckadelia (Horace Mann), Tuesday, 3 February 2004 16:43 (twenty-one years ago)

I just got a message with the following subject 'MakeR0N JeremyLookSmallCompared2You' from none other than Mark C!!!

― Pinkpanther (Pinkpanther), Tuesday, 10 February 2004 12:49 (twenty-one years ago)

But but you're already taller than Ron Jeremy!

― Markelby (Mark C), Tuesday, 10 February 2004 14:18 (twenty-one years ago)

Haha!

― Pinkpanther (Pinkpanther), Tuesday, 10 February 2004 14:20 (twenty-one years ago)

Cyclone B. Duplicators

― hmmm, Tuesday, 10 February 2004 15:44 (twenty-one years ago)

one month passes...
I don't usually look at my Yahoo bulk mail folder, but I did today. I get very little porn spam, but today's single example, "open Innocent hard virgins getting art (sic) it anally here", was sent by one Janette Matos. Any relation?

― Markelby (Mark C), Tuesday, 30 March 2004 07:55 (twenty-one years ago)

Qualm E. Coherently

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Friday, 2 April 2004 01:15 (twenty-one years ago)

Tommy D. Gay just emailed me about getting Vicodin, Hydrocodone, or Norco with FREE overnight FedEx. How considerate, that Tommy D. Gay.

― Leee O'Gaddy (Leee), Sunday, 4 April 2004 04:11 (twenty-one years ago)

Stumbles L. Spook just felt it urgent to tell me about a sale of notebooks by his company, what a guy.

― Jarlr'mai (jarlrmai), Wednesday, 7 April 2004 07:26 (twenty-one years ago)

Date: Tue, 06 Apr 2004 20:33:29 +0200
From: Ricky Hanna <lvuyllaukwx@overture.com>
To: 'Jl007c' <jl007c@rochester.edu>
Subject: release the man in you beaujolais gorilla gunk

greetings Jl007c [rmoVPrFgHhBp]  
Good people do not need laws to tell them to act responsibly while bad
people will find a way around the laws. - Plato (427-347 B.C.)  
First they ignore you then they laugh at you then they fight you then you
win. - Mahatma Gandhi (1869-1948)

― Lil' Fancy Pants (ex machina), Wednesday, 7 April 2004 07:30 (twenty-one years ago)

From: Boom P. Discontinuance
Dates: Sun 11 April

Hey honey! :)
No one is more profoundly sad as one who laughs too much.
No one is as deaf as the man who will not listen.

Mark, the only source for cheap and quality medications!
http://bodacious.wsmeds.com/d13/index.php?id=d13 ornithological
A specter is haunting Europe -- the specter of communism.
The trick is to realize that after giving your best, there's nothing more to give.
Was this the face that launched a thousand ships, and burnt the topless towers of Ileum?
To know that we know what we know, and that we do not know what we do not know, that is true knowledge.

― mark s (mark s), Sunday, 11 April 2004 14:50 (twenty-one years ago)

offshorepharmacy.com!

― stockholm cindy (Jody Beth Rosen), Sunday, 11 April 2004 14:53 (twenty-one years ago)

one for the Canadians: Alberta Winters

― stockholm cindy (Jody Beth Rosen), Sunday, 11 April 2004 19:28 (twenty-one years ago)

i really like mine

― Lil' Fancy Kpants (The K is Silent) (ex machina), Sunday, 11 April 2004 19:57 (twenty-one years ago)

I got one from Ting-Pong Curry.

― kirsten (kirsten), Sunday, 11 April 2004 20:04 (twenty-one years ago)

Truman Romo

― stockholm cindy (Jody Beth Rosen), Monday, 12 April 2004 10:57 (twenty-one years ago)

one month passes...
Today's was my best ever: Emphasized V. Stickies, offering me "gangbang lessons" (you'd think that'd be fairly intuitive, but I guess there are techniques the professionals use).

― Layna Andersen (Layna Andersen), Friday, 14 May 2004 02:55 (twenty-one years ago)

Remind me not to read this thread at work please. Can't stop laughing.

― dog latin (dog latin), Friday, 14 May 2004 10:46 (twenty-one years ago)

I want to share the following phrase from a typical Nigerian spam email we got at work. He's talking about being under house arrest (so he can't get access to the money, natch):

"Before my in-castration, I went ahead to dispatch the sum of five hundred million United States Dollars {USD$500,000,000.00} in cash..."

― NA (Nick A.), Friday, 14 May 2004 13:57 (twenty-one years ago)

Reindeer L. Orthodontist

― Hayden Nicholls (Pop the Weasel), Friday, 14 May 2004 14:42 (twenty-one years ago)

Damnit! looked again and now my boss is getting suspicious.

― dog latin (dog latin), Friday, 14 May 2004 14:45 (twenty-one years ago)

i just got a special offer from the "giftfox"!

― stockholm cindy (Jody Beth Rosen), Friday, 14 May 2004 23:08 (twenty-one years ago)

Mention B. Mudslingers
Galloped G. Crossbarred
Encircle R. Request
Ned F. Raggett

― Sean Carruthers (SeanC), Friday, 14 May 2004 23:24 (twenty-one years ago)

Well I...hey!

Today one Schizophrenia A. Horus noted urgently that I'm supposed to sprinkle salt on it.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Saturday, 15 May 2004 16:16 (twenty-one years ago)

From: Quinton
Subject: pod


When I saw this I thought QUINTRON was mailing me :(((

― Be sure to Loop! Loop, Loop, Loop. (ex machina), Friday, 21 May 2004 14:35 (twenty-one years ago)

Date: Fri, 28 May 2004 05:07:34 +0100
From: Braun <wzhafviebto@spray.se>
To: xxxx@xxxx
Subject: humus

Meier,

Govenment don't want me to sell
UndergroundCD !Check Your spouse and staff
Investigate Your Own CREDIT-HISTORY
hacking someone PC!
Disappear in your city
bannedcd2004

http://tkdfohlcz.thebiggestand.com/amite/CD/

modicum,what an absurd.


― amateur!st (amateurist), Friday, 28 May 2004 03:20 (twenty-one years ago)

From: Rochell Shanika <dcvjch37tnh@visi.net>
To: xm@while1.net
Subject: Hahahha, Little Pe-nis U Have agonizing rise chaeta

― Be sure to Loop! Loop, Loop, Loop. (ex machina), Friday, 28 May 2004 19:39 (twenty-one years ago)

I've been getting those mortgage ones with random words as the subject as well, here at work. They're always called things like 'debris' or 'portland' or something.

― NA (Nick A.), Friday, 28 May 2004 19:50 (twenty-one years ago)

yeah i get those too na.

"modicum,what an absurd" sounds like a good mark e. smith line.

― amateur!st (amateurist), Friday, 28 May 2004 20:23 (twenty-one years ago)

two weeks pass...
I just got one from "Celine Dions Left Ear AT hotmail DOT com". I am finding it hard to contain myself.

― dog latin (dog latin), Sunday, 13 June 2004 09:54 (twenty-one years ago)

S'PECMIAL AyLE(RT : (-o>tcbnb: IDP|YS) -- 300% gains eWx4pec[t!ed


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/t anhd KOeaep the# Faith The Stock Mule TAesam
    This prof~ile is not wi2thout bias, aZnd is a paid reltease,. WriteTrs and ma1ile(rs hav?e be$en
compensated f!o0r; tDhe disse-mination& of company inform6ation1 on behLalNf; of one or more of
the coImpanies mention}eyd in tqhis release. Par\tieEs invol)v7ed in the crefatio\n axnd distriEbution
of this p%rofi/le h[aveC beenO co^mp^ensvate-d 40,r000 dollars b/y a third party (cthird party),; w?ho
i(s{ nonaffiliated7, for se%rvices provid/ed iVncluding dissXem)in)atioJnv of coUmpany) ifn,formnation
in thisX release. PR and otsher inAd4ividuals and othe>r creLators and ma!ilersc of$ this5 lentteNr
will sell all? of its o^riginal sdhares during the dis$tribugtGio/n of* th8iWs0 pXr[ofi2leY. Parties
involved may immediately se;ll some or any sh\ares in a pro)f%iGled cuompany heljd by# profilWez
creators an+d may h;ave previously sold shares in a profiled comApanpy held by PR Individu7als iX
nvolBved. Our Opti5n mailinvgr seerv[ices f}or aR companjy may caus}e the companyU s0tocKk[
pric+e to increase,! in which evze;nt involbved parPties would make3 a profit whe{n it{ selcls itsl stB
ock in th]e companjy. In acddition, our selling o/f a compa#ny\ stock may ha|ve a ne$gative effect
on the market% price of= the s>toc|k. Thev past prof6ilezs are o;nly the winners not all of. our reco_
mmendations

― Pashmina (Pashmina), Sunday, 13 June 2004 10:57 (twenty-one years ago)

There was about 4 more paragraphs like this, with the subj header "newsletter #5943". It's kind of interesting to me in that in making it filter-proof with character substitution, they've made it about as close to unreadable as I can imagine.

― Pashmina (Pashmina), Sunday, 13 June 2004 10:59 (twenty-one years ago)

Z. Jewis sent me a message called "swordfish ferromagnetic calvinist" and Brian Bates and Jillian Lovett sent me "aerodynamic dream" and "asteroid necromancers for 340" respectively. I will treasure them always.

― chrisco (chrisco), Sunday, 13 June 2004 13:53 (twenty-one years ago)

This from upthread:

Gainpro will take your sex life to new levels... Guaranteed!
Your penis will grow up to 3 inches
Your erections will be rock hard
Your sex drive will be supercharged
Your orgasms will be more intense
Your partner will be astounded

= http://jeaun.com/jeaun/archives/wesley_willis.jpg

GAINPRO ERECTIONS
GAINPRO ERECTIONS
GAINPRO ERECTIONS
GAINPRO ERECTIONS

― Curt1s St3ph3ns, Sunday, 13 June 2004 22:02 (twenty-one years ago)

Soothes O. Racquet greeted me with "Wakey Wakey!" and solicitations for somebody's web cam.

― Layna Andersen (Layna Andersen), Monday, 14 June 2004 01:35 (twenty-one years ago)

i am more than a little creeped out that you are talking about all my pals...

― saza bob, Monday, 14 June 2004 02:24 (twenty-one years ago)

here's the footer on one i just got:

trifluoride tank burlesque collateral host pursue marvin ugly Clifford House,7-9,Clifford,StreetYO1,YORK,UK
etymology spectacular mi discussion proprioception ow alliterate dame Please go to
if you wish to be excluded from future mailings.
urbanite money forbear glycerin

― g--ff (gcannon), Monday, 14 June 2004 16:36 (twenty-one years ago)

I just got an email from Charity Bacon. To my amazement, she is a real person - a recruiter, which makes me quite happy! :-)

― Layna Andersen (Layna Andersen), Tuesday, 15 June 2004 23:33 (twenty-one years ago)

There's someone called Major Payne in my local cemetery. I laughed, then felt guilty, then laughed again. No he hasn't sent me any spam.

― New No New Age Advanced Ambient Motor Music Almanac (Autumn Almanac), Tuesday, 15 June 2004 23:37 (twenty-one years ago)

one month passes...
I got a message today: "Important News From Earnest "

I thought it was from Jim Varney :(

http://webpages.marshall.edu/~majdala1/varney2b.jpg

― Red Panda Sanskrit (ex machina), Wednesday, 11 August 2004 11:21 (twenty-one years ago)

urbanite money forbear glycerin

That's genuinely beautiful. Ahhhh.

― Liz :x (Liz :x), Wednesday, 11 August 2004 12:02 (twenty-one years ago)

This thread is a fantastic resource for anyone planning to write a novel and stuck for character names. My two main charatcers will be called Bing Zhong and Jimmybommy JimmyK'KANG, but I'll need plenty of others to flesh out the universe...

― Sick Mouthy (Nick Southall), Wednesday, 11 August 2004 12:05 (twenty-one years ago)

Today Underskirt B. Ecstasies has invited me to consider a 'Mind Blowing Quality Big Rseolution Movie Archive' -- I have taken it under advisement.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Monday, 23 August 2004 13:36 (twenty-one years ago)

Harper A. Shame
Shark Grady
Gift Fox (a distant cousin, perhaps?)
Anchovy Pace
Egotism Babcock
Lenin Parlay
Candy Cox
Boris Perjury

― jocelyn (Jocelyn), Thursday, 2 September 2004 18:06 (twenty-one years ago)

Subject: spying software watching your work Kennith


KEN C?!!?!?

― gainfully employed (ex machina), Thursday, 2 September 2004 18:26 (twenty-one years ago)

From: Leif Keasey RE: Spiderman Pharmacy

― Kim (Kim), Thursday, 9 September 2004 01:17 (twenty-one years ago)

one month passes...
Hiram Carney
Fannie Sexton
Janell Bacon
Pierre Estrada
Kristy Goins

― sometimes i like to pretend i am very small and warm (ex machina), Sunday, 24 October 2004 18:33 (twenty-one years ago)

Eager F. Nigerians got a hold of me today.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Saturday, 6 November 2004 19:21 (twenty-one years ago)

Retardation L. Mendeleev

― hmmm (hmmm), Thursday, 18 November 2004 16:33 (twenty-one years ago)

Flimflam H. Gracie

― hmmm (hmmm), Thursday, 18 November 2004 16:36 (twenty-one years ago)

two months pass...
The website Glay.org was deeply interested in me today:

From: "glay.org"
Subject: Hey, me again

Wanted to interest you in keeping me some company.
My idiot Husband is working all day and I need a man in these hard times of life.

Those darn idiot Husbands!

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Thursday, 20 January 2005 01:57 (twenty years ago)

(I am SO writing a short novel or something where all the character names are taken from this thread.)

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Thursday, 20 January 2005 02:00 (twenty years ago)

four weeks pass...
Strangers O. Finish

Farting J. Escalate

― RJG (RJG), Friday, 18 February 2005 14:40 (twenty years ago)

one month passes...
Ulysses Q. Fitzgerald
Moira Moira Moira
Anth90nni P J N03ll3

― Remy (x Jeremy), Tuesday, 29 March 2005 19:07 (twenty years ago)

A quick review of my junkmail folder reveals:
Buttressed M Extingishers
Solon Q Electrocute
Alabaster V Fangs
Rembrandt U Becomingly
Helene Hinkle
Scumming E Browning
Berzilius A Overshoe
Stamped U Infirmary
Twigged C Frock
Piebald T Continuous

― Thermo Thinwall (Thermo Thinwall), Tuesday, 29 March 2005 19:17 (twenty years ago)

I got a "Repulsiveness Q. Crazing" this morning.

― sunburned and snowblind (kenan), Tuesday, 29 March 2005 19:32 (twenty years ago)

Repulsiveness Q. Crazing? Is he one of the Wexford Crazings?

― accentmonkey (accentmonkey), Tuesday, 12 April 2005 16:05 (twenty years ago)

Astrud Gnelotti
Jake Jack
Noelle Darby
Harriett Swan
Christa Pate

― lupine lupin (lupinelupin), Tuesday, 12 April 2005 20:01 (twenty years ago)

Termite H. Kickstands
Lorenzo Vogt
Induction G. Valkyrie
Lucknow I. Overreached
Jeremy Blakenship ("where have you been hiding man?")
Encounters J. Fusillades
Rendezvouses P. Retrieving
Gideon Jubfge
Thesaurus H. Pinkies
Exaggerates F. Crisscrosses
Scum M. Alston ("RE: Wet Bithecs big dick senecs" Pardon?)

― Philip Alderman (Phil A), Tuesday, 12 April 2005 21:12 (twenty years ago)

From: "Nationality S. Philadelphia" Pinochet@iteco.sk
Subject: Reply: Wild Housewires Being Fucked

― Open your eyes; you can fly! (ex machina), Thursday, 21 April 2005 03:14 (twenty years ago)

two months pass...
From: Elmo Kinsella
Subject: calls calls

― OLD SPICE® CHEMTRAILS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (ex machina), Monday, 18 July 2005 22:42 (twenty years ago)

four months pass...
What is it about me that this is the best my spammers can do?

Pat Vera
Naomi Hackett
Rolland Simon
Jody Crane
Allie Helton
Silas Lackey
Whitney Duarte
Nadia Benitez
Stan Polk
Junior Barrera
Fay Seay
Ron Pike
Sheri Nunez
Forrest Gaston
Kristy Alfaro
Madeline Reyna
Millie Grubbs

― Beth Parker (Beth Parker), Monday, 28 November 2005 15:07 (twenty years ago)

I just like spam! I'm collocting junk email...

― aasunshine, Wednesday, 7 December 2005 05:35 (twenty years ago)

I write a different spam name up on the office wall every month.
Last month was Groundswell Q Shinbone
This month is Independent W Jiggle

― Forksclovetofu (Forksclovetofu), Wednesday, 7 December 2005 07:08 (twenty years ago)

this week's gems:

Sibyl K. Raincoat
Otherworldly C. Decent
Personnel S. Ophthalmolo. (i didn't add that period, it was there!)

― tres letraj (tehresa), Wednesday, 7 December 2005 07:10 (twenty years ago)

Rotogravure B. Puss
Drone L. Geological

― mies van der rohffle (Jody Beth Rosen), Wednesday, 7 December 2005 07:14 (twenty years ago)

I like to imagine an Animal Crossing-like town where they all live. Groundswell Q. Shinbone sells snakeoil from a covered wagon and Independent W. Jiggle is the Justice of the Peace.

― Forksclovetofu (Forksclovetofu), Wednesday, 7 December 2005 07:16 (twenty years ago)

this one time, i got email from "Titney Spears"

― Kim (Kim), Thursday, 8 December 2005 04:15 (twenty years ago)

This is what my sister got when she copied the subject lines of her spam. Little do we know what poetry is unable to fit in that pinched and crabb'd window!

1. From: "Harriett Watts"
Subject: But johannesburg i'll someday term at that time of year I was going down there whaling but I felt complimented too placid satisfaction Now I have found it "You may not be surprised to hear Annie " but the days of my inhabiting there were gone and the old time was past I was heavier at

2. From: "Scot Lambert"
Subject: I've cranston or imprecate masque I was so filled with the play and with the past for it was in a manner half a crown I was got up in a special great coat and shawl expressly to do honour to that Indeed Poor commando Jack said Mrs Christiansen shaking her head That trying climate

3. From: "Chang Tompkins"
Subject: Id slate may datsun enthusiasm monster lived who had bought my jacket I stretched my neck eagerly to look for No its because you are like no one else You are so good and so sweet tempered You have such a be natural and needlepoint I hope so aunt Your sister Betsey Camille

4. From: "Mona Hamilton"
Subject: That hundredth be schoenberg estate at all expected or led up to that she could only tell the ore it was like himself and go His hand trembles his speech is not plain and his eyes look wild I have remarked that at those times the coachmans shoulder so near to me that his breath quite tickled the back of my head and as

― Beth Parker (Beth Parker), Thursday, 8 December 2005 16:49 (twenty years ago)

Ionic D. Hyperventilation

― koogs (koogs), Wednesday, 14 December 2005 09:34 (twenty years ago)

Pippy Tanatichat

― Paul Eater (eater), Tuesday, 27 December 2005 06:20 (nineteen years ago)

Crocodiles B. Idolized

― Davvvrageh stteaakenssyrr, Tuesday, 27 December 2005 20:22 (nineteen years ago)

Allen Delong

― gabbneb (gabbneb), Tuesday, 27 December 2005 20:24 (nineteen years ago)

Beau Purcell has sent me the following:

The X-Men Search Engines!
Could I speak to...
In 1806
In 1826 I advised you

But it's an ad for fake Rolexes. I wanted an X-Men Search Engine.

― Allyzay must fight Zolton herself. (allyzay), Tuesday, 27 December 2005 20:39 (nineteen years ago)

Sprinkles Q. Vomit

― Laura H. (laurah), Tuesday, 27 December 2005 21:12 (nineteen years ago)

There's a TV evangelist who turns up on tele in the small hours here who must have got his name from his in-box: CREFLO A. DOLLAR

― Fred Nerk (Fred Nerk), Thursday, 29 December 2005 02:05 (nineteen years ago)

Rotterdam H. Technocracy!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

IT'S THE NEWWWWWWW STYYYYYLE

― Tantrum The Cat (Tantrum The Cat), Thursday, 29 December 2005 02:22 (nineteen years ago)

one month passes...
Gossamer T. Coiffure

― elmo, patron saint of nausea (allocryptic), Tuesday, 14 February 2006 15:07 (nineteen years ago)

Ailing Lazarus.

He go chop my dollar.

― Nicholas Passant (Nicholas Passant), Tuesday, 14 February 2006 21:21 (nineteen years ago)

Quincy T. Moon

― clodia pulchra (emo by proxy), Tuesday, 14 February 2006 21:50 (nineteen years ago)

The Ultimate Online Pharmaceutical - Weaseled P. Futures

― Last Of The Famous International Pfunkboys (Kerr), Tuesday, 14 February 2006 23:14 (nineteen years ago)

Huge Steroid Cocks

contradiction in terms shurely?

― john clarkson, Wednesday, 15 February 2006 00:04 (nineteen years ago)

one month passes...
From a comment on Balloon Juice:

As much as I despise spam, at least once in while I get e-mails from some interesting names. Over the years, I’ve received offers from, among others, Pantheism A. Iffy, Onassis C. Supposes, Padlocked H. Gregorio, Lambasted C. Spigot, Embarrassment M. Theorist, and Opinionated R. Ingenuousness.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Tuesday, 21 March 2006 18:55 (nineteen years ago)

today: Skedaddling Q. Conductors!!!

― s1ocki (slutsky), Tuesday, 21 March 2006 19:13 (nineteen years ago)

Oversampling C. Rodent

― koogs (koogs), Friday, 24 March 2006 09:51 (nineteen years ago)

Dictator S. Spaghetti

― koogs (koogs), Wednesday, 5 April 2006 14:59 (nineteen years ago)

Colloid M. Laminate

― Ichigo (ex machina), Wednesday, 5 April 2006 15:36 (nineteen years ago)

Applicator I. Wintry

― Ichigo (ex machina), Wednesday, 5 April 2006 15:36 (nineteen years ago)

Autumn Salter

― Ichigo (ex machina), Wednesday, 5 April 2006 15:37 (nineteen years ago)

Legendre H. Oshkosh
Symbolize A. Handgun

― koogs (koogs), Friday, 7 April 2006 06:32 (nineteen years ago)

Swastika M. Hubcaps

― koogs (koogs), Monday, 10 April 2006 11:26 (nineteen years ago)

Fatima Belcher

― Fight the Real Enemy -- Tasti D-Lite (ex machina), Wednesday, 12 April 2006 05:01 (nineteen years ago)

Lambasted F. Susana
Dimmest B. Adverbs

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Monday, 17 April 2006 20:28 (nineteen years ago)

After a long period of boring names, they seem to have decided to produce a few crackers again...

Jesus J. Retard
Dr. Enrique Ponce
Jack J. Jack
Myfanwy Oxfam (nice try!)
Chava Thrasher

― Si.C@rter (SiC@rter), Monday, 17 April 2006 23:08 (nineteen years ago)

Jesus J. Retard

I am so happy.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Monday, 17 April 2006 23:13 (nineteen years ago)

Seriously, that's going to be the title of the film that Adam Sandler makes with Harmony Korine.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Monday, 17 April 2006 23:14 (nineteen years ago)

If only Jim Varney were alive he could play Adam's dad in that.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Monday, 17 April 2006 23:15 (nineteen years ago)

Ninepins T. Midwest
Keewatin T. Revulsions
Gerardo Strong

etc

― JW (ex machina), Wednesday, 26 April 2006 03:55 (nineteen years ago)

two weeks pass...
The facile project continues:

Calibrator G. Adapt
Roald Kitchens
Beauteously E. Mulder
Scents D. Raffles
Janette Sprague (with a message temptingly titled "Amazing, stuff, ogress")
Olavo Rainwater
Patriarch C. Terri
Creosote I. Toulouse
Jared Triplett
Disorienting B. Yelled
Clotures O. Spooning
Dymphna Demeo
Pilgrim S. DiMaggio
Beau Sparks
Faustus O. Cranking

― Alba (Alba), Monday, 15 May 2006 11:02 (nineteen years ago)

I knew you had gmail. gmail gets the best spam, yahoo gets the dullest. Witness the contents of my bulk mail folder:

Mattie Robison [fwd] We found company ready to EXPLODE!!
Kristine Betts Re: Re:
Deandre Blanco information
Barry Bledsoe Hey! tell your friends to hit me up
Elton Roach [fwd] We found company ready to EXPLODE!!
Jayne Maurer [fwd] Watch CGDC like a hawk tomorrow!! The alert is on!!
Erich Lockwood Re [4]:
Robert Gilliam Matrix Order
Bret Boyce Hey bro, check out the huge sale these guys are offering
Cecelia Nance Privacy Statement
Jeanine Seay Re: ?
Joseph Moore Re: hello
Milton Patrick re [14]:
Francesca Ball Customer recognition with your custom logo
Jonah Lewis Hey! tell your friends to hit me up
Gerardo Hill your usage statistics
Teresa Connors Re: PASSWORD
Robert Jackson Job Letter - right from the employer
Luther Ott You left something the other night
Candace Williamson Open something new for your self

― Beth Parker (Beth Parker), Monday, 15 May 2006 12:14 (nineteen years ago)

Today's favorite:

Neff Beaver says "he nearly ripped me in half!"

― Jay Vee's Return (Manon_69), Tuesday, 23 May 2006 19:40 (nineteen years ago)

four weeks pass...
Denture J. Bludgeoning to me

welcome to the best pharmacy


(No bluddy chance!)

― mark grout (mark grout), Thursday, 22 June 2006 08:27 (nineteen years ago)

I just spent five minutes with the search engine trying to find this thread to revive it and Grout beat me to it?!

I'm not easily impressed by stupid spam names these days but Benneth Bone inspired a chuckle.

― Paul Eater (eater), Thursday, 22 June 2006 13:36 (nineteen years ago)

A couple of latest ones...

Andromache Wellhung
and
Knut Hamburger (who claims to be able to "cure any deseses")

― Si.C@rter (SiC@rter), Thursday, 22 June 2006 14:31 (nineteen years ago)

Spam subject line: Sexy Victoria gets poped hard

― Andrew Farrell (afarrell), Wednesday, 5 July 2006 08:28 (nineteen years ago)

Saddam McPartlin

― mark grout (mark grout), Tuesday, 11 July 2006 09:01 (nineteen years ago)

Marmaduke Deloach

― Machibuse '80 (ex machina), Friday, 14 July 2006 20:33 (nineteen years ago)

Wheeler M. Tosillectomy
Revivification S. Yammering
Sermonize G. Burroughs
Impiety J. Anyone
Insincere D. Griffin
Topographic H. Liebfraumilch

― slugbuggy (slugbuggy), Friday, 14 July 2006 23:06 (nineteen years ago)

Shirtnow Warning : Africa Bloggers Italiano Linux

― Jay Vee's Return (Manon_69), Saturday, 15 July 2006 00:10 (nineteen years ago)

name: Lambert Reyes
subject line; subservient blooper

― Beth Parker (Beth Parker), Saturday, 15 July 2006 00:29 (nineteen years ago)

I find "Kawfully Zawfulness" to be one of this thread's most unsung heroes. Also, "Allen Delong", might he be related to Tynan?

― Daniel_Rf (Daniel_Rf), Saturday, 15 July 2006 14:56 (nineteen years ago)

"Ira Begay," the first Jewish Navajo!

― gabbneb (gabbneb), Sunday, 16 July 2006 02:17 (nineteen years ago)

Dear Bob Gob,

Your relationship with Sony is about to become even more rewarding...

...Good luck!
The My Sony Team

― Hard like armour (Hard like armour), Monday, 17 July 2006 22:10 (nineteen years ago)

I like it when they come straight to the point:

Can you assist, send me clear package that contains usd$20m all us$100 bills?

Reply me
James Collins
- James Collins

― Paul Eater (eater), Saturday, 22 July 2006 16:18 (nineteen years ago)

two weeks pass...
The simple joy of stupid spam obituaries

― Elvis Telecom (Chris Barrus), Friday, 11 August 2006 23:44 (nineteen years ago)

one month passes...
Irrigating Q. Gherkin!

― H2-H4 (H2-H4), Wednesday, 20 September 2006 03:37 (nineteen years ago)

"Gabbneb"

― gabbneb (gabbneb), Wednesday, 20 September 2006 04:25 (nineteen years ago)

Sender: Ned Bland
Subject: I Know How To Find A Lot of Girls!

C1al1s S0ft Tabs is the new impotence treattment drug that everyone is talking about. I use them myself so I know they work!

Here goes some reasons to choose C1al1s S0ft Tabs:
1. You can mix a1cohol drinks with this tabs without any undesired effects.
2. CIaIls does not make you feel dizzy or make vision blurred, so you can easily drive a car or operate heavy machinery.
3. CIaIls works much faster than any known ED treatment solution. ttt enters the bloodstream directly instead of going through the stomach, thus you need only 15 minutes till you feel the effect.


AND ALSO
C1al1s S0ft Tabs formula is effective for 95% of the patients. If this treatment is not effective for you, we will refund you for every unopened pack. All you have to do is send them back, and we will immediatley refund your account!

― Brigadier Lethbridge-Pfunkboy (Kerr), Wednesday, 20 September 2006 13:20 (nineteen years ago)

VIP Watches Replica Spam

leukemia terrible to me
More options 2:15 am

EXACT COPIES OF SWISS WATCHES

- exact copies of V.I.P. watches
- perfect as a gift for your colleagues and friends

Rolex, Patek Philippe, Omega
Cartier, Bvlgari, Franck Muller

.. and 15 other most famous brands.


Mate, you really should change your name and/or disown yr parents.

― mark grout (mark grout), Saturday, 23 September 2006 20:35 (nineteen years ago)

In "subject headings" category:

-----
Men from the wall just how could the Commdora kept off
-----
mild Vegan tobacco of the tape. Sutt would refuse to
-----
prince regent the glass (thoughts; r's). You the trip?
-----

― The Vintner's Lipogram (OleM), Thursday, 28 September 2006 07:33 (nineteen years ago)

I got one today from John Mark Byers, the name of the probable murderer in the West Memphis Three documentaries.

― Tiki Theater Xymposium (Bent Over at the Arclight), Thursday, 28 September 2006 09:37 (nineteen years ago)

one month passes...
today's spam (all the identical pump and dump share buying email):


Thu 05:59 PM	Ronnie Browning		It's Ronnie :)	3K 
Thu 12:37 PM	Eloise Kennedy		It's Eloise :)	2K 
Thu 08:54 AM	Sheldon Ragland		It's Sheldon :)	2K 
Thu 08:49 AM	Yolanda Robinson	It's Yolanda :)	3K 
Thu 08:30 AM	Liz Cummings		It's Liz :)	2K 
Thu 08:26 AM	Rose Kern		It's Rose :)	2K 
Thu 08:13 AM	Leland Sheppard		It's Leland :)	2K 
Thu 07:56 AM	Alfreda Porter		It's Alfreda :)	2K 
Thu 07:45 AM	Diego Hensley		It's Diego :)	2K 
Thu 05:28 AM	Maude Esposito		It's Maude :)	2K 
Thu 03:47 AM	Fanny Sims		It's Fanny :)	3K 
Thu 02:45 AM	Candace Lawson		It's Candace :)	2K  
Thu 12:10 AM	Bobbie Roth		It's Bobbie :)	2K 
Wed 11:55 PM	Cornelia Levy		It's Cornelia :)	2K 
Wed 11:32 PM	Garland Petty		It's Garland :)	2K 
Wed 11:31 PM	Harlan Weir		It's Harlan :)	2K 
Wed 08:18 PM	Jewell Chamberlain	It's Jewell :)	2K 
Wed 07:57 PM	Arturo Tompkins		It's Arturo :)  2K

― Koogy Yonderboy (koogs), Thursday, 9 November 2006 10:25 (nineteen years ago)

Ah, I had Renee, Rosalinda, Johnathon, Gene - and Lamar Romero, of course.

― Nicholas Passant (Nicholas Passant), Thursday, 9 November 2006 11:05 (nineteen years ago)

I just got an email from "Elvia Q. Moistness". She sounds very regal.

― Craig Gilchrist (Craig Gilchrist), Friday, 10 November 2006 12:13 (nineteen years ago)

A quick glance in my spam folder shows emails from Anastacia Suggs, Esdras Furry, Irmtraud Poindexter, Meave Cleavenger and Ermintrude Rigsby, amongst others.

― ailsa (ailsa), Friday, 10 November 2006 12:31 (nineteen years ago)

Pearline Sherline
Ellen Wingert
Mr. Macias
Fidda Weiser
Krister Topper
Jesus Yoho
Nicu Wolpert
Aatu Nigh
Wilhelm Bilbrey
Fahd Post
Aleesha Ester
Neo Bonomo
Jure Borchert
Nerio Cybart
Sapphira Urman
Eos Curran

― Cressida Breem (neruokruokruokne?), Friday, 10 November 2006 12:42 (nineteen years ago)

Heredity L. Shaft

― the realness of Colonel Sanders (H2-H4), Wednesday, 15 November 2006 05:57 (nineteen years ago)

"...you damn right!"

― the realness of Colonel Sanders (H2-H4), Wednesday, 15 November 2006 05:58 (nineteen years ago)

Headhunter D. Taxicab

― Koogy Yonderboy (koogs), Tuesday, 21 November 2006 09:23 (nineteen years ago)

I think I went to school with him.

― Michael Jones (MichaelJ), Tuesday, 21 November 2006 10:22 (nineteen years ago)

Nitis Rouneld
Hugo Druber
Blanca Grove
Ilari Mustafa

― g00blar (gooblar), Tuesday, 21 November 2006 10:33 (nineteen years ago)

two months pass...
I just got an ad for Viagra with the subject header "Bin Laden denounces inclusion in Worst Dressed list". I almost bought some

― Hell Hath No Furry (DJ Mencap), Thursday, 8 February 2007 10:08 (eighteen years ago)

one month passes...
Boredom R. Intimidation
Irrelevance D. Gayness

― Michael Jones, Tuesday, 13 March 2007 14:01 (eighteen years ago)

Ejaculation C. Debbie

― onimo, Friday, 23 March 2007 10:28 (eighteen years ago)

Izsawfish Misanthropic wrote to me today with the subject "Not my maggot". There was an attachment: urinary.gif. Didn't open it.

― Michael Jones, Thursday, 5 April 2007 09:33 (eighteen years ago)

P3nis Sup3rPow3r!

USA, Russia, China! You have a new challenger!

― jel --, Tuesday, 10 April 2007 17:25 (eighteen years ago)

From: mrduncanhe✧✧✧@ya✧✧✧.c✧.u✧
Subject: Subject 2Subject 7
Date: March 16, 2007 1:52:03 PM PDT
To: m✧✧@online✧✧✧.c✧✧

When toward polar bear is slow, steam engine around sanitize of umbrella

― max, Tuesday, 10 April 2007 17:29 (eighteen years ago)

i really dont get the ones that have no links and apparetly aren't selling anything.

― max, Tuesday, 10 April 2007 17:29 (eighteen years ago)

ASTRONOMY RYAN wants me to try Hoo*dia.

― Abbott, Tuesday, 10 April 2007 20:44 (eighteen years ago)

wtf xpost

― BIG HOOS aka the steendriver, Tuesday, 10 April 2007 21:23 (eighteen years ago)

In the eyes of government, we are just one race here. Make your own badge here. We defeated Communism. Our proudest moments are yet to be.

Furthermore, Google's delivery of more relevant ads may encourage viewers with DVR units to watch ads rather than fast forward through them. It is the soldier, not the poet, who has given us freedom of speech.

Cable operators may see Google as a direct threat to their business - though Google is relying on deals with small networks in order to generate significant inventory. "By re-arranging the homepage and inviting readers to act as editors, Topix hopes to turn their millions of readers into a participatory community. We started in 2004 by automatically aggregating the news and localizing it by ZIP code.
It's not unethical if you're disclosing to your readers that it's advertising, which is more than I can say for a lot of the PR fluff that lands in major newspapers and magazines as editorial."

The essential causes of Rome's decline lay in her people, her morals, her class struggle, her falling trade, her bureaucratic despotism, her stifling taxes, her consuming wars.

― Tracer Hand, Wednesday, 11 April 2007 16:03 (eighteen years ago)

Milquetoast Freemasonry

― Ed, Tuesday, 24 April 2007 14:12 (eighteen years ago)

Suzie Chen was selling me printer cartridges and Pam Jones told me I could drop 30lbs and be bikini ready in a month. Um, thanks Pam, I thought about 4 - 7lbs would have done it really.

― Anna, Tuesday, 24 April 2007 14:24 (eighteen years ago)

one month passes...

i has a new algorithm!

Mmjliteracy Lyon
Srliquid Beck
Ucseafood Milligan

(i think they may be friends with mike's 'Izsawfish Misanthropic'. they do seem to have similar interests)

― koogs, Wednesday, 6 June 2007 11:48 (eighteen years ago)

three weeks pass...

Tiffany Slaughter

― koogs, Thursday, 28 June 2007 09:07 (eighteen years ago)

Ilene Crenshaw <a✧✧✧@a✧✧✧.c✧✧>
to avon49

show details
Jun 26 (2 days ago)
Hi! I am tired today. I am 25 y.o. girl that would like to chat with you. Email me at bp✧✧✧@anymailonl✧✧✧.i✧✧✧ only. If you would like to see some of my pictures.

Candice Knapp <99_pe✧✧✧.c✧✧@j✧✧✧.n✧✧>
to avon49

show details
Jun 28 (1 day ago)
Hi! I am tired today. I am 25 y.o. girl that would like to chat with you. Email me at f✧✧@anymailonl✧✧✧.i✧✧✧ only. I would like to share some of my pics.

Kareem Garner <a-1cr✧✧✧@6✧✧.a✧✧.o✧.a✧> (a girl named Kareem!)
to allbeingz

show details
Jun 27 (1 day ago)
Hi! I am bored today. I am 25 y.o. girl that would like to chat with you. Email me at i✧@anymailonl✧✧✧.i✧✧✧ only. You will see some of my private pics.

― Heave Ho, Friday, 29 June 2007 01:24 (eighteen years ago)

This was the subject line of a spam I got a few days ago:

Kansas became known as the “Meth Mecca” because of the state's large population of meth producers and users.

― Brent, Friday, 29 June 2007 02:28 (eighteen years ago)

one month passes...

War Israel

― Hurting 2, Sunday, 5 August 2007 02:45 (eighteen years ago)

i do love it when they can't even be bothered to setup their software correctly:

From: Freda Laird
Subject: {subj_spamit}

― koogs, Friday, 17 August 2007 08:33 (eighteen years ago)

Leopoldo Kirkland
Fereidoon konkel' (note apostrophe

― nathalie, Friday, 17 August 2007 08:41 (eighteen years ago)

one month passes...

Psychorealistic Fletcher

Exceeders Finn
Clunks Haskins
Actuarially Guevera
Knothole Hinton

and German Fernandez.

― Michael Dudikoff presents Action Adventure Theatre, Wednesday, 10 October 2007 12:47 (eighteen years ago)

Sheena Goncharenko
Tubbe Stok

― snoball, Wednesday, 10 October 2007 16:56 (eighteen years ago)

This just in from "Benjamin Franklin", advertising an online casino.
Subject: "I was a dork and now I'm best friends with Benjamin Franklin"

― snoball, Wednesday, 10 October 2007 18:57 (eighteen years ago)

three weeks pass...

Not a spam name, but some of these penis enlargement spam subject lines are getting pretty De Sadean.

Beat her womb with your giant!

― Eric H., Tuesday, 6 November 2007 04:46 (eighteen years ago)

there was a lovely one today promising an attached game of chasing angelina jolie's ass around hollywood.

― bnw, Tuesday, 6 November 2007 04:50 (eighteen years ago)

Bonita Moon

― Tape Store, Tuesday, 6 November 2007 06:09 (eighteen years ago)

sail down the love canal more confidently

― whatever, Tuesday, 6 November 2007 07:02 (eighteen years ago)

Elvia Y. Jernigan tells me to "prepare your love wand for the next battle"

― whatever, Thursday, 8 November 2007 16:10 (eighteen years ago)

one month passes...

Barrister Jossip Welber

From Barrister Jossip Welber
Dear Friend,

My name is Barrister Jossip Welber, an Attorney at Law.

I am writing to notify you of the unclaimed inheritance deposit of our late client, Mr.Morris Thompson who passed on to the Great beyond 0n Tuesday,August 24, 2004 in the Siberia Airlines Tu-154 Crash.I got your name and email address through a web search engine in my quest to get a reliable individual who shall work with me in claiming this inheritance deposit since all efforts to get the biological relative has proved abortive.

Get back to me with your tel/fax numbers for more information on the amount of inheritance, procedure and legality of this claim via this email address jwelbe✧✧✧@a✧✧.c✧✧.

Regards,
Jossip Welber
Attorney At Law
Rrply to this email address: jwelbe✧✧✧@a✧✧.c✧✧

― Mackro Mackro, Saturday, 15 December 2007 20:24 (eighteen years ago)

one month passes...

Gena Ponce is lonely and would like to chat with me tonite.

― Madchen, Wednesday, 16 January 2008 10:13 (seventeen years ago)

dsaf Ratikoski is bitching at me about not being able to get on the "f****ing bed."

― miryam, Thursday, 17 January 2008 00:22 (seventeen years ago)

two months pass...

Not a stupid name, but recent spam I've received has taken a trash-literary bent:

He dreamed of the piling, so real he felt he could almost reach out and slide his palm over its green-black fissured curve.

[blurb about some sex product deleted]

Outside he could hear the roaring sound of Annie's bright-blue riding lawnmower — she was around front, giving the grass a good trim so those cockadoodie Roydmans wouldn't have anything to talk about in town.
I don't kid myself that you'd care about getting another two people killed, if it would help you.
She studied his white, sweat-beaded face for a moment, then nodded and left the room.

― Michael Jones, Monday, 14 April 2008 10:47 (seventeen years ago)

three weeks pass...

Dr. Angus Basil

― tehresa, Monday, 5 May 2008 19:36 (seventeen years ago)

two months pass...

am getting lots of fake headlines as subject lines:

Raw footage of snake swallowing horse
Raging bull gores 3 in freak accident
Girl loses breasts in surgical disaster

all with links purporting to be videos of said accidents.

the link appears to say 'you must download video activex object to play this video file' after which i am sure much jollity ensues.

― koogs, Tuesday, 22 July 2008 18:59 (seventeen years ago)

haha yeah my gmail spam folder is a constant source of entertainment

IBM to file for bankruptcy
Typhoon in Taiwan devastates city
Michelle Obama latest fashion disaster
Torture widespread in Palestinian jails
Facebook under attack by clones!!

It's like reading the Daily Mail!

― ken c, Friday, 1 August 2008 12:53 (seventeen years ago)

Somebody calling themselves "Gay Funk" is clearly channelling Yoda with a spam e-mail titled "Be not afraid of making changes in your life"

― snoball, Friday, 1 August 2008 12:58 (seventeen years ago)

"Arnold Bumptious Nguyen"

― snoball, Saturday, 2 August 2008 07:38 (seventeen years ago)

three months pass...

Attn: Winner,

You won the sum of $500,000.00 USD from our monthly sweepstakes. Your
email address was among the five lucky winner in our computer email
ballot,You are hereby advice to get back to us,to claim your prize.

CONTACT COURIER PROMOTION MANAGER WITH DETAILS BELOW;PPPAY COURIER UK
CORRESPONDENCE: Mr Mally Runk.

TEL : +44-701-113-3045

FAX : + 44 7 07 505 5654

E MAIL: mallyr✧✧✧@hotm✧✧✧.c✧✧

EMAIL:pppaycour✧✧✧@hotm✧✧✧.c✧✧

PLEASE NOTE: NON RESIDENTS OF THE UNITED KINGDOM ARE TO BEAR EXPENSES
FOR THIER COURIER DELIVERY.

Claims Requirements:

1.full name:

2.Home Address:

3.Age:

4.Sex:

5.Marital Status:

6.Phone Number:

7.Nationality :

8.Country Of Residence.

9. Occupation.
Regards,

Stella White

― omar little, Monday, 24 November 2008 18:12 (seventeen years ago)

four months pass...

Kenneth Williams lives

Cher,
Nous vous saluons au nom du Dieu tout-puissant.
Mon nom est Kenneth Williams et ma soeur Juliet en provenance de la Sierra Leone. Nous vous écris de République de Côte d'Ivoire, où nous avons pris refuge après la guerre brutale et le meurtre de nos parents par les rebelles lors de la reprise des combats dans notre pays.
En raison de la guerre, notre regretté père a vendu sa compagnie de navigation et nous a emmenés à un pays voisin la Côte d'Ivoire, où il a déposé 18.000.000,00 millions de US $ dans son compte auprès d'un étranger de la banque ici en Côte d'Ivoire. En raison de la situation politique actuelle en Côte d'Ivoire, nous sommes à la recherche de votre aide pour transférer cet argent et aussi déménager dans votre pays afin d'approfondir notre étude et nous sommes disposés à vous offrir 15% de la somme totale pour votre aide, mais nous pensons que vous ne pourrez pas faire partie de ce l'argent lorsque la banque d'ici le transfert de votre compte, nous attendons vos réponses, nous allons vous donner plus d'informations sur le transfert.
Cordialement,
Kenneth & Juliet Williams.

― Prince of Persia (Ed), Friday, 3 April 2009 11:28 (sixteen years ago)

Arbuckle Pegelow
Louise Wang
Freeman Mayo
Giovanni Bruce (I imagine that he's a flamboyant Australian fashion designer)

― snoball, Friday, 3 April 2009 12:03 (sixteen years ago)

Cedric Dillard

― snoball, Saturday, 4 April 2009 13:52 (sixteen years ago)

Jessica Simpson recently sent me a very intriguing missive about the English National Lottery. I am American.

― DJ Mr. Face Stabba, M.D. (Whitey on the Moon), Thursday, 16 April 2009 03:51 (sixteen years ago)

nine months pass...

Just got the greatest sender/subject line combo ever:

"Secure State of the Art SSL Encryption"

sent to me by

"Sex Sexual"

― Sex Sexual (kingfish), Wednesday, 3 February 2010 02:32 (fifteen years ago)

six months pass...

"Jaw dropping, thong dropping monster."

― Don Homer (kingfish), Friday, 6 August 2010 03:58 (fifteen years ago)

one year passes...

Dr Sambo Whitehead

― cissémanwhore (DJ Mencap), Sunday, 20 May 2012 11:37 (thirteen years ago)

Bellyngton Sweetecok, and it's not pR0n spam

― Bryan, Tuesday, 22 May 2012 21:03 (thirteen years ago)

I wonder if Playboy Bloodbath is still sending email?

― EDB, Tuesday, 22 May 2012 21:58 (thirteen years ago)

five months pass...

Charley Horton and Rosanne Cabrera both sound as if they could be names of local city council members. But they aren't.

― Elvis Telecom, Thursday, 8 November 2012 06:00 (thirteen years ago)

three months pass...

Hetty Osborne and Odette Costello are tempting me with share advice.

― Stop Gerrying Me! (onimo), Friday, 15 February 2013 16:18 (twelve years ago)

one year passes...

kurtcobain.seomanager at gmail.com

― From Tha Crouuuch To Da Palacios (DJ Mencap), Tuesday, 22 April 2014 08:20 (eleven years ago)

three weeks pass...

Ok Higman

― john wahey (NickB), Tuesday, 13 May 2014 13:42 (eleven years ago)

Puffin Daniel

― Master of Treacle, Tuesday, 13 May 2014 14:03 (eleven years ago)

Sex Sexual wasn't a mid 80s Prince alter ego?
.

― Master of Treacle, Tuesday, 13 May 2014 14:18 (eleven years ago)

two weeks pass...

i have a skype acct for work

an individual named berry.wetquirtz7 just asked me to add them

― goole, Thursday, 29 May 2014 17:13 (eleven years ago)

two weeks pass...

Cookie Scampoli - impotency will never come back into your life

― cwkiii, Monday, 16 June 2014 22:01 (eleven years ago)

one year passes...

Genevieve Kropotkin

― feargal czukay (NickB), Tuesday, 1 September 2015 13:39 (ten years ago)

dying at these

― illegal economic migration (Tracer Hand), Tuesday, 1 September 2015 21:04 (ten years ago)

six months pass...

just received an urgent email about an unpaid invoice from Karla Winstanley

― illegal economic migration (Tracer Hand), Tuesday, 1 March 2016 13:05 (nine years ago)

Chad Bogan

― François Pitchforkian (NickB), Thursday, 10 March 2016 10:46 (nine years ago)

:D

― Flamenco Drop (VegemiteGrrl), Thursday, 10 March 2016 19:20 (nine years ago)

two years pass...

Brit Method

― i'm surprised to see your screwface at the door (NickB), Tuesday, 1 May 2018 08:55 (seven years ago)

three months pass...

Sergeant. Alvina Snelson.

― incarcerated moonfaces (how's life), Friday, 24 August 2018 15:14 (seven years ago)

Dicky Scarwin

― incarcerated moonfaces (how's life), Wednesday, 29 August 2018 12:51 (seven years ago)

The greatest spam email I've ever received:

From: steveng [mailto:steveng @ 14zero.pl]

Subject: Hi there steveng

Elvet Bridge is now largely pedestrianised. June 3, 1894, p. I cannot betray that trust.

Notes:

  • I am also a Steven G, but not @14zero.pl
  • Elvet Bridge exists, and in fact has been largely pedestrianised
  • I can't find anything of interest that happened on June 3, 1894
  • What does the ", p." bit mean?
  • By posting this, I've probably betrayed that trust

― Hideous Lump, Thursday, 30 August 2018 03:30 (seven years ago)

B. Drinicky Bangg

― mick signals, Friday, 31 August 2018 18:52 (seven years ago)

Ethel Barnes
Your personal curator

― I'd Rather Kecak (NickB), Wednesday, 5 September 2018 08:41 (seven years ago)

Mrs. Gezerias Bell

― Neil S, Wednesday, 5 September 2018 10:34 (seven years ago)

Sharon Fencil

― Neil S, Tuesday, 11 September 2018 09:05 (seven years ago)

Smarta Femming

― mick signals, Thursday, 20 September 2018 17:35 (seven years ago)

one month passes...

Mandalina Hataway

― mick signals, Wednesday, 31 October 2018 14:57 (seven years ago)

Billy Oceak

― mick signals, Wednesday, 7 November 2018 19:34 (seven years ago)


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