Bi-Desperation

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Are any of you bi-desperate?

― phil-two (phil-two), Friday, 6 February 2004 00:59 (twenty-two years ago)

Nope. Just bipolar.

― martin m. (mushrush), Friday, 6 February 2004 01:00 (twenty-two years ago)

because that rack on you is looking mighty tasty these days.

― phil-two (phil-two), Friday, 6 February 2004 01:00 (twenty-two years ago)

Phil wants some ribs

― donut bitch (donut), Friday, 6 February 2004 01:03 (twenty-two years ago)

What does 'bi-desperate' mean?

― Andrew (enneff), Friday, 6 February 2004 01:22 (twenty-two years ago)

oh, you know. bi-curious means well, you're kinda curious about sleeping with a member of the same sex.... bi-desperate means well, you're kinda horny and not getting any so maybe a member of the same sex will do....

― phil-two (phil-two), Friday, 6 February 2004 01:25 (twenty-two years ago)

it's like a combination of homo-desperate and hetero-desperate

― Matos W.K. (M Matos), Friday, 6 February 2004 01:25 (twenty-two years ago)

so are you thinking girls now, phil? out of desperation?

― Matos W.K. (M Matos), Friday, 6 February 2004 01:25 (twenty-two years ago)

Well in that case, I'm definitely not bi-desperate.

― Andrew (enneff), Friday, 6 February 2004 01:28 (twenty-two years ago)

Did that happen bi-accident?

Sorry, I was just leaving.

― Alex in NYC (vassifer), Friday, 6 February 2004 01:32 (twenty-two years ago)

who me? no no. well, maybe for a week and see how it goes. it seems it would be much easier to find a reasonably interesting/attractive girlfriend than an equally interesting/attractive boyfriend. girls, or ribs. either one i guess.

― phil-two (phil-two), Friday, 6 February 2004 01:35 (twenty-two years ago)

It must be when one's bi-curious for too long.

― Prude (Prude), Friday, 6 February 2004 01:41 (twenty-two years ago)

Haha, last weekend to thread!

― jaymc (jaymc), Friday, 6 February 2004 02:32 (twenty-two years ago)

(He was cute, though.)

― jaymc (jaymc), Friday, 6 February 2004 02:32 (twenty-two years ago)

(And I probably would've made out with him even if it hadn't been three years since I last got some play.)

― jaymc (jaymc), Friday, 6 February 2004 02:34 (twenty-two years ago)

(So, no: I'm not bi-desperate. Maybe a little bemused, though, since I thought those days were behind me.)

― jaymc (jaymc), Friday, 6 February 2004 02:35 (twenty-two years ago)

(what days, what happenned, photos, etc, please)

― phil-two (phil-two), Friday, 6 February 2004 02:36 (twenty-two years ago)

Bi-mused, perhaps?

― Prude (Prude), Friday, 6 February 2004 02:39 (twenty-two years ago)

Haha, Phil, you asked for it. So basically, I identified myself as bi from ages 15 to 20 or so, and fooled around with a couple of boys in that time -- one was a friend from high school toward whom I felt a great deal of affection/intimacy; the other was a dude in college who I basically just hooked up with and never knew that well. But as I got older, men started to strike my fancy much less -- my type was always boyish, anyway -- and I had my first long-term relationship with a woman, so I didn't really think of myself as bi anymore.

What happened last weekend: My friend Jessica had a birthday party and invited this posse of gay kids she knows. They're currently seniors at the college Jessica and I both attended -- Jess is a couple years younger than me and they're a couple years younger than her, so I didn't know them at all. Anyway, so I get to talking to this one fella, and it turns out we had a lot of the same professors, were involved in the same activities, etc., and I'm sort of enjoying playing the older, wiser one who can look back at his college days with nostalgia. ("Do they still have such-and-such there? Oh, haha, I remember that.") I'm also super-drunk because there's a special on double pints at the bar we're at. And so I don't remember exactly how it came up, but I think someone said, "You guys should kiss." Which was fine by me, because he was totally my type, so we kind of made out, standing up in the middle of the bar. And then, I dunno, long story short, we went back to Jess's house where they were all spending the night, and we shared a floor and blanket and made out some more, with the lights off. So, um, yeah. That's it. Probably not too notable, except as I said, it was literally the first time in three years I'd made out with anyone.

― jaymc (jaymc), Friday, 6 February 2004 02:57 (twenty-two years ago)

No photos, though ;-)

― jaymc (jaymc), Friday, 6 February 2004 02:58 (twenty-two years ago)

Go for the ribs, Phil.

― Sean (Sean), Friday, 6 February 2004 03:41 (twenty-two years ago)

what about just plain old desperate

― strongo hulkington (dubplatestyle), Friday, 6 February 2004 03:42 (twenty-two years ago)

otm!

― Pinkpanther (Pinkpanther), Friday, 6 February 2004 09:23 (twenty-two years ago)

I passed through desperate a long time ago. I now don't fancy anyone AT ALL. Maybe I should become a monk.

― Ricardo (RickyT), Friday, 6 February 2004 09:40 (twenty-two years ago)

You have to fancy God for that to work, Ricky.

― Liz :x (Liz :x), Friday, 6 February 2004 09:45 (twenty-two years ago)

Bugger

― Ricardo (RickyT), Friday, 6 February 2004 09:48 (twenty-two years ago)

No Mr Badger, none of that either!

― Pinkpanther (Pinkpanther), Friday, 6 February 2004 09:50 (twenty-two years ago)

Asexuality!

― Liz :x (Liz :x), Friday, 6 February 2004 09:52 (twenty-two years ago)

Masturbating to god. Isn't that like sin squared?

― Markelby (Mark C), Friday, 6 February 2004 11:06 (twenty-two years ago)

SIN SQUARED!!!!

― the surface noise (electricsound), Friday, 6 February 2004 11:07 (twenty-two years ago)

tori amos is fucked then...literally and otherwise

― ipsofacto (ipsofacto), Friday, 6 February 2004 11:09 (twenty-two years ago)

i'm tri-desperate

― stevem (blueski), Friday, 6 February 2004 11:10 (twenty-two years ago)

What, wont Mr Winkie wont even play with you anymore Stevem?

― Pinkpanther (Pinkpanther), Friday, 6 February 2004 11:21 (twenty-two years ago)

No he said I was too old and moved to Runcorn.

― stevem (blueski), Friday, 6 February 2004 11:24 (twenty-two years ago)

Yeah that can happen!

― Pinkpanther (Pinkpanther), Friday, 6 February 2004 11:34 (twenty-two years ago)

Haha Runcorn's already full of cocks.

― Matt (Matt), Friday, 6 February 2004 16:30 (twenty-two years ago)

Heh. Reminds me of a peiod in my life that I summarized in the hypothetical song title, "Bisexual, Bipolar, or Just Bilious?"

― j.lu (j.lu), Friday, 6 February 2004 19:19 (twenty-two years ago)

Not quite your definition, but as a bi person who hasn;t had sex with anyone for a full year now, maybe I could use the term anyway...

― Martin Skidmore (Martin Skidmore), Friday, 6 February 2004 19:52 (twenty-two years ago)

sounds hot, jay. hot.

― phil-two (phil-two), Saturday, 7 February 2004 19:51 (twenty-two years ago)

yay for jaymc hooking up!

― tokyo rosemary (rosemary), Saturday, 7 February 2004 20:38 (twenty-two years ago)

I've never had sex with God. We're just good friends.

― the music mole (colin s barrow), Saturday, 7 February 2004 21:14 (twenty-two years ago)

rickyt otm.

― mark p (Mark P), Saturday, 7 February 2004 21:17 (twenty-two years ago)

sadly.

― mark p (Mark P), Saturday, 7 February 2004 21:17 (twenty-two years ago)

one year passes...

Hmmm.

― jaymc (jaymc), Friday, 20 January 2006 19:11 (twenty years ago)

Indeed.

― gbx (skowly), Friday, 20 January 2006 19:24 (twenty years ago)

If only the question was, "Have you ever been bi-desperate?"

― Laurel (Laurel), Friday, 20 January 2006 19:35 (twenty years ago)

I think the term is "involuntary celibacy."

― j.lu (j.lu), Friday, 20 January 2006 19:37 (twenty years ago)

Laurel, then what?

― jaymc (jaymc), Friday, 20 January 2006 19:43 (twenty years ago)

Oh, I just think that might be a condition I would have to arrive at separately for each occurrence. Like, the fact that I've been driven to desperation in the past doesn't make it any more or less likely for any given occasion; it's pretty situational.

― Laurel (Laurel), Friday, 20 January 2006 19:47 (twenty years ago)

I'm guessing that's true for me as well.

― jaymc (jaymc), Friday, 20 January 2006 19:49 (twenty years ago)

In the sense that I'm never thinking, "OMG I should just start hooking up with guys and then everything will be solved!" But if the opportunity presents itself and I don't have anything better to do, then sometimes it happens.

― jaymc (jaymc), Friday, 20 January 2006 19:51 (twenty years ago)

Hah. Then again, the chances of me being that attracted to ANYone are pretty situational so what do I know?

― Laurel (Laurel), Friday, 20 January 2006 19:52 (twenty years ago)

I went through a phase of being bi-curious-curious, where I was intrigued by bi guys enjoying both sexes at once (specifically, I suppose, MMF porn and its real-life implications) but that never inflammed much and passed quickly.

― Casuistry (Chris P), Friday, 20 January 2006 19:53 (twenty years ago)

Those visuals are sometimes interesting.

― jaymc (jaymc), Friday, 20 January 2006 19:55 (twenty years ago)

Wow, that was a self-censoring post, huh?

― jaymc (jaymc), Friday, 20 January 2006 19:56 (twenty years ago)

Get in line, sister. I'm censoring like crazy!

― Laurel (Laurel), Friday, 20 January 2006 19:57 (twenty years ago)

....go on.

― gbx (skowly), Friday, 20 January 2006 19:58 (twenty years ago)

im not bi-desperate, im just desperate (kinda).

― POOP BITCH (Mandee), Friday, 20 January 2006 20:04 (twenty years ago)

(J., didn't you make out or more with someone after my show with the FFs in December?)

― Eazy (Eazy), Friday, 20 January 2006 20:10 (twenty years ago)

But if the opportunity presents itself and I don't have anything better to do, then sometimes it happens.

― jaymc (jaymc), Friday, 20 January 2006 20:11 (twenty years ago)

(Oh wait, those messages were from 2004! I was at Jess's birthday party too, but I missed the making-out part.)

― Eazy (Eazy), Friday, 20 January 2006 20:12 (twenty years ago)

Jay, I think you're an extremely modest player.

― Matthew C Perpetua (inca), Friday, 20 January 2006 20:12 (twenty years ago)

I don't even know what that means!

― jaymc (jaymc), Friday, 20 January 2006 20:13 (twenty years ago)

"im not a player, i just fuck a lot" like big pun

― phil-two (phil-two), Friday, 20 January 2006 20:16 (twenty years ago)

[people] love cool jay

― mookieproof (mookieproof), Friday, 20 January 2006 20:18 (twenty years ago)

id hit it.

― fauxhemian (fauxhemian), Friday, 20 January 2006 20:30 (twenty years ago)

how come jaymc's flustrated?

― POOP BITCH (Mandee), Friday, 20 January 2006 20:36 (twenty years ago)

I was going to answer that and then realized it would turn into a rant.

― jaymc (jaymc), Friday, 20 January 2006 20:37 (twenty years ago)

He's not frustrated, he's "artsy".

― Casuistry (Chris P), Friday, 20 January 2006 20:41 (twenty years ago)

"im not a player, i just fuck a lot" like big pun

But I ... no.

― jaymc (jaymc), Friday, 20 January 2006 20:56 (twenty years ago)

rant away, jaymc.

are you just super picky?

― POOP BITCH (Mandee), Friday, 20 January 2006 20:59 (twenty years ago)

I wouldn't say so. Maybe I used to be. Maybe a little bit. Anyway, I didn't revive this thread because I was feeling frustrated or desperate right now! I had forgotten about it until Phil linked to it, and thought it was interesting.

― jaymc (jaymc), Friday, 20 January 2006 21:07 (twenty years ago)

Fuck, now I feel like I should clarify the first part of that post. Resisting...

― jaymc (jaymc), Friday, 20 January 2006 21:11 (twenty years ago)

i still want some ribs though

― phil-two (phil-two), Friday, 20 January 2006 21:15 (twenty years ago)

explain in the form of a song, jaymc!

― POOP BITCH (Mandee), Friday, 20 January 2006 21:18 (twenty years ago)

I like that the first Google hit for "lifelong bachelor" is Pres. James Buchanan and the second is Paul Lynde.

― jaymc (jaymc), Friday, 20 January 2006 21:38 (twenty years ago)

Yeah, cause playing on the away field is sooo much easier.

― Eric H. (Eric H.), Friday, 20 January 2006 21:44 (twenty years ago)

It is the away field is full of gay men.

― jaymc (jaymc), Friday, 20 January 2006 21:47 (twenty years ago)

Sorry: It is if the away field is full of gay men.

― jaymc (jaymc), Friday, 20 January 2006 21:49 (twenty years ago)

Yeah, gay men who are all too busy with straight men they'll happily touchback.

― Eric H. (Eric H.), Friday, 20 January 2006 21:53 (twenty years ago)

... or maybe this metaphor is dangerous territory for me.

― Eric H. (Eric H.), Friday, 20 January 2006 21:54 (twenty years ago)

im gonna try to make out with someone tonite.

― phil-two (phil-two), Friday, 20 January 2006 22:04 (twenty years ago)

Good luck with that.

― jaymc (jaymc), Friday, 20 January 2006 22:07 (twenty years ago)

Awww, Phil, that's kind of cute. I wish you luck and tons of success.

― Laurel (Laurel), Friday, 20 January 2006 22:08 (twenty years ago)

It's a good goal. Maybe I should set goals like that!

― jaymc (jaymc), Friday, 20 January 2006 22:09 (twenty years ago)

next time you're in town, we should make out too

― phil-two (phil-two), Friday, 20 January 2006 22:10 (twenty years ago)

I'm gonna try making out with someone tonight too, except I'm married to the someone, and Phil probably has a better shot.

― Haikunym (Haikunym), Friday, 20 January 2006 22:11 (twenty years ago)

this birthday party im going to, there will be lots of hot asian girls. and fey'ish geeky white dudes who are into hot asian girls. and im always suspicious of fey'ish geeky white dudes who are into hot asian girls. i think they're actually into asian guys (me), so im going to try to bag one of them.

btw laurel, can you ask your roommate if he still has my baxendale "american friend" 7-inch?

― phil-two (phil-two), Friday, 20 January 2006 22:12 (twenty years ago)

I'll ask, but I wouldn't count on his being able to find it on short notice.

― Laurel (Laurel), Friday, 20 January 2006 22:14 (twenty years ago)

I am going to attempt to thwart Phil's attempts to get laid tonight, despite having no reason for doing so and being thousands of miles away. I just want to test the powers of my MIND!

― Casuistry (Chris P), Friday, 20 January 2006 23:14 (twenty years ago)

These sexy threads haven''t been very good lately.

― Jimmy Mod (I myself am lethal at 100 -110dB) (The Famous Jimmy Mod), Friday, 20 January 2006 23:16 (twenty years ago)

I want to make out tonight, but am sick.

...secretly I just want to fall asleep on the couch with someone.

xpost colds are not sexy.

― gbx (skowly), Friday, 20 January 2006 23:18 (twenty years ago)

Chris, in that case, I'm going to test the powers of my mind by trying to foil your attempt to thwart phil-two's kissing goal.

― M. White (Miguelito), Friday, 20 January 2006 23:23 (twenty years ago)

I think we have an experiment here of the highest quality, and I expect conclusive results.

― Martin Skidmore (Martin Skidmore), Friday, 20 January 2006 23:25 (twenty years ago)

http://www.universohq.com/cinema/images/xavier_cerebro.jpg

― gbx (skowly), Friday, 20 January 2006 23:26 (twenty years ago)

shit, now i better make out with someone. but the birthday is for a korean and i heard there's kimchee being served, which will make it hard to make out with anyone

― phil-two (phil-two), Friday, 20 January 2006 23:28 (twenty years ago)

happy birthday, kimchee!

― oops (Oops), Friday, 20 January 2006 23:33 (twenty years ago)

good luck phil!

― joseph (joseph), Friday, 20 January 2006 23:49 (twenty years ago)

Great story, John. I hope you've made out with more guys since then.

― Alfred, Lord Sotosyn (Alfred Soto), Saturday, 21 January 2006 01:12 (twenty years ago)

http://www.bisitaguam.com/images/fiestas/kimchee.jpg
http://www.blackfilm.com/i3/movies/y/yougotserved/004.jpg

― Haikunym (Haikunym), Saturday, 21 January 2006 01:35 (twenty years ago)

Gee whiz it just seems that the world is just much more difficult to navigate and meet someone of substance and quality, and the rules of acceptance on if you're gay/bi/straight are more lax and so everyone posting here (no matter what their typical gender preference) seems willing to go bi at least for a while just to get some affection. What an abysmal commentary on quantity & quality of available partners -- or is it? -- maybe it's better cuz your odds are doubled if you're willing to look for guys or gals for some cuddles, kicks, companionship and romance?

― Wiggy (Wiggy), Saturday, 21 January 2006 03:04 (twenty years ago)

What? No, it's more like commentary on how poorly thought out the whole straight/gay dichotomy is. It just isn't like that! Unless you have, like, a penis fetish. Then, maybe.

― Casuistry (Chris P), Saturday, 21 January 2006 04:08 (twenty years ago)

HAVE SEX WITH ME NOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!

― Batman, Saturday, 21 January 2006 08:10 (twenty years ago)

i feel this. i sucked my friend's dick for the first time a while ago. it didn't really gross me out but i wasn't feeling it at all. it was REALLY boring. after the first minute or so, it was like, can we get this over with already???? but i was paranoid about him cumming in my mouth. he was trying to give me all kinds of directions too. "no, don't ROCK your head, go UP and DOWN. yeah. okay okay. here. get a grip on it and then put your mouth at the top and make your mouth FOLLOW your hand up and down." whatever, dude. i'll do it AS I PLEASE. the one actually gross part was that for some reason he was super moist up top. i've never even seen an uncut dick in real life before and it seemed like there was a lot of salty juice being produced in the top part. gross!!!! he's like 9 inches too and superthick so it was hard not to let my molars drag in places. you know, you never really get to examine other dudes dicks, so it was kind of cool to examine and shit. i gagged on it a few times all nasty cause i like when girls do that to me and he was all like, don't go down so far! really really unimpressed. i let him suck me for a bit too so the power relationship would equal or whatever. pretty lame. it was just DIFFERENT, i guess. partly from being a friend, partly from being a dude. i couldn't drive my hand around the small of his back like a skateboard on a halfpipe or pick his ponytail up and suck and smell his hair. i couldn't look deep into his eyes and kiss his ears while he squeezed on my dick. it wasn't unpleasant and he was pleased but for me it was just really mediocre, boring and sparkless.

― 333333333, Saturday, 21 January 2006 11:30 (twenty years ago)

"What's the secret?" "Try it and you'll seeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!"

"Salted fish and half the flavour- highly chewy, tastes great, low in calorieeeeeeeeeee"

Now you have to guess which post I am referring to.

― JTS (JTS), Saturday, 21 January 2006 13:32 (twenty years ago)

I've turned down two bi-desperate guys in the last year. THE NEXT ONE WILL NOT BE SO LUCKY.

― edward o (edwardo), Saturday, 21 January 2006 13:49 (twenty years ago)

Do we get a follow-up report, Philly?

― Laurel, Sunday, 22 January 2006 19:34 (twenty years ago)

oh, chris won. no making out.

― phil-two (phil-two), Sunday, 22 January 2006 22:18 (twenty years ago)

Phil, thank you for saving yourself for me.

― Casuistry (Chris P), Monday, 23 January 2006 06:01 (twenty years ago)

does it count if you're gay but desperate enough to fuck pussy? because i am speedily approaching such a crisis point.

― elmo, patron saint of nausea (allocryptic), Monday, 23 January 2006 15:00 (twenty years ago)

i'm totally try-desperate

― ken c (ken c), Monday, 23 January 2006 15:21 (twenty years ago)

Elmo, I think that's where Phil was coming from when he started this thread!

― jaymc (jaymc), Monday, 23 January 2006 16:04 (twenty years ago)

I'm desperate enough to eat a chicken salad wrap right now.

― Alfred, Lord Sotosyn (Alfred Soto), Monday, 23 January 2006 16:57 (twenty years ago)

maybe it's better cuz your odds are doubled if you're willing to look for guys or gals for some cuddles, kicks, companionship and romance?

OR you set yourself up to be rejected by the other 50% of the human race.

(Being particularly bitter, am I?)

― j.lu (j.lu), Tuesday, 24 January 2006 03:45 (twenty years ago)

Your personal history of masturbation

― Sick Mouthy (Nick Southall), Tuesday, 24 January 2006 10:18 (twenty years ago)

elmo, I feel your crisis point.

― Dr Morbius (Dr Morbius), Monday, 30 January 2006 16:58 (twenty years ago)

Morbius, I think my major problem is that I am gay but I'm not attracted to fags! Also, I have been taking advantage of my non-threatening gay dude status to grab boobies. Interesting!

(... enter indignant reaction by anthony easton here)

― elmo, patron saint of nausea (allocryptic), Monday, 30 January 2006 17:32 (twenty years ago)

Elmo, by "fags" do you mean femmes? Or just gay men across the board?

― jaymc (jaymc), Monday, 30 January 2006 17:33 (twenty years ago)

Well, I certainly don't find effeminacy attractive in men at all, but the overcompensating hypermasculinity of certain subsets of gay culture doesn't really work for me, either. I just like dudes. If they happen to be gay, that's good, but if they are straight, it won't stop me from subtly trying to seduce them (sometimes successfully).

― elmo, patron saint of nausea (allocryptic), Monday, 30 January 2006 18:57 (twenty years ago)

Well, I certainly don't find effeminacy attractive in men at all, but the overcompensating hypermasculinity of certain subsets of gay culture doesn't really work for me, either. I just like dudes.

This is probably unfair of me but, thanks to a few friends of mine, whenever I read something like this I immediately assume the guy who wrote it was wearing a tiara at the time.

― Dan (Also Pixie Wings) Perry (Dan Perry), Monday, 30 January 2006 19:00 (twenty years ago)

Also, I have been taking advantage of my non-threatening gay dude status to grab boobies. Interesting!

oh yes, i do this all the time. ive been getting bold and when female friends come over to sit on my lap, i've been resting my hand on my thigh, palm-upwards, with two fingers sticking in the air, so when they sat down, blam! none of the girls seemed that upset!!

― phil-two (phil-two), Monday, 30 January 2006 19:01 (twenty years ago)

I am always offered my choice of boobies.

Elmo's point is well-taken. An ex-boyfriend once complained that I disliked femmes because I was (of course) a self-hating fag (he was, of course, a femme). Now I just don't give a fuck.

― Alfred, Lord Sotosyn (Alfred Soto), Monday, 30 January 2006 19:05 (twenty years ago)

Now I'm seeing a late-80s/early-90s fluorescent jungle-print prom dress.

― Dan (Snarf) Perry (Dan Perry), Monday, 30 January 2006 19:07 (twenty years ago)

I had something more like this mind, Dan:

http://www.americanphoto.co.jp/pages/movie/HU/Previews/Plans-20773.jpg

― Alfred, Lord Sotosyn (Alfred Soto), Monday, 30 January 2006 19:10 (twenty years ago)

There needs to be a Chasing Amy for dudes.

― Je4nn3 ƒur¥ (Je4nne Fury), Monday, 30 January 2006 19:12 (twenty years ago)

Or a Boxing Helena.

― Casuistry (Chris P), Monday, 30 January 2006 19:26 (twenty years ago)

none of the girls seemed that upset!!

Yeah, when I'm grabbin boobies of my female friends the most I get is a playful slap and giggles. My straight male friends have remarked on how unfair this is to them.

― elmo, patron saint of nausea (allocryptic), Monday, 30 January 2006 19:49 (twenty years ago)

phil + elmo = isaac mizrahi on a red carpet

― Dr Morbius (Dr Morbius), Monday, 30 January 2006 19:55 (twenty years ago)

So this is now a thread about how easy it is for gay men to touch boobies?

― Casuistry (Chris P), Monday, 30 January 2006 20:00 (twenty years ago)

In that case, maybe I should go gay.

― jaymc (jaymc), Monday, 30 January 2006 20:02 (twenty years ago)

No wonder I've never really drawn my share of fruit flies!

― Dr Morbius (Dr Morbius), Monday, 30 January 2006 20:07 (twenty years ago)

Well, it's not like you can walk to any woman in a bar, grab a handful of boobflesh, and say "No, it's okay, really -- I'm gay!"

― elmo, patron saint of nausea (allocryptic), Monday, 30 January 2006 20:09 (twenty years ago)

You can, can't you. Just admit it.

― Markelby (Mark C), Monday, 30 January 2006 20:22 (twenty years ago)

Maybe, if you're femme.

― elmo, patron saint of nausea (allocryptic), Monday, 30 January 2006 20:36 (twenty years ago)

You can't do it with strangers, but it sometimes doesn't take much.

― Casuistry (Chris P), Tuesday, 31 January 2006 00:54 (twenty years ago)

Apparently, you can do it to celebrities too!
http://www.youtube.com/w/Scarlett-Johansson-Groped?v=bHVfTV0Tkys&feature=Views&page=3&t=d&f=b

― rrrobyn (rrrobyn), Saturday, 4 February 2006 18:09 (twenty years ago)

two months pass...

ugh, i just had the most depressing encounter with a newly-bi sorta-acquaintance last night. i was hanging out at his apt - he was so nervous and pacing around and then telling me how he's not gay and could never, you know, actually DATE a guy, just whatever. then talking about his girlfriend. then saying how it must be great to be gay because gay guys can get laid whenever. and how he could never ever tell any of his friends that he's made out with guys. actually, not made out with, since he said that he would feel weird kissing a guy - but eating his ass apparently is ok. then he emptied a bag of coke onto the table, which i didnt really want, but hey, it was there, you know? so i had to endure like 5 hours of sitting there like i was his therapist. but we chatted and listened to music, or whatever. and watched the vitalic poney music video. then he started looking at pics of naked guys on his computer, then abruptly told me that he was going to bed and if i needed money for a taxi. so i went home at like 6:30am, not even with a little smooch. god, what a depressing night. i knew it was going to be trouble. he was so cute though, and kinda fun to hang out when he wasn't having bi-guilt and subsequently making me feel like shit. why am i telling you this? i don't know. bisexuality is really confusing to me.

― phil-two (phil-two), Thursday, 6 April 2006 18:25 (nineteen years ago)

Aw phil!! That sounds frustrating.

― Tracey Hand (tracerhand), Thursday, 6 April 2006 18:30 (nineteen years ago)

Ugh, indeed.

― jaymc (jaymc), Thursday, 6 April 2006 18:31 (nineteen years ago)

PHIL, that sounds HARRIBLE. God, I"m sorry.

― Laurel (Laurel), Thursday, 6 April 2006 18:38 (nineteen years ago)

Coke-induced confessional behavior is sooooo annoying. Whether you're being confessed to or whether you are the confessor.

I was in a bar a few weeks ago and met a girl with gigantic boobs and before 5 minutes had passed I was all over them.

Eating ass is pretty cool.

― WhiskeyTangoFoxtrot (unclejessjess), Thursday, 6 April 2006 18:48 (nineteen years ago)

but my emotional stability was definitely not able to handle that whole thing very well. oh well, lesson learned. no more hanging out with bi-curious/bi-desperate guys. well, unless he calls again. he was totally cute!

― phil-two (phil-two), Thursday, 6 April 2006 18:58 (nineteen years ago)

Pics please.

― WhiskeyTangoFoxtrot (unclejessjess), Thursday, 6 April 2006 19:33 (nineteen years ago)

at least he offered taxi $$$. :(

― elmo argonaut (allocryptic), Thursday, 6 April 2006 19:34 (nineteen years ago)

so why didn't you punch him out and take his coke?

― Alfred, Lord Sotosyn (Alfred Soto), Thursday, 6 April 2006 19:55 (nineteen years ago)

Two words: j/o party

― jaymc (jaymc), Thursday, 6 April 2006 19:57 (nineteen years ago)

You only have to go through something like that with somebody once to know you'll never do it again (with luck).

― Dr Morbius (Dr Morbius), Thursday, 6 April 2006 20:07 (nineteen years ago)

Boy. Quite a Greek chorus the three of us made.

― Alfred, Lord Sotosyn (Alfred Soto), Thursday, 6 April 2006 20:09 (nineteen years ago)

b-b-but bi-curious dudes are my stock in trade!

― elmo argonaut (allocryptic), Thursday, 6 April 2006 20:11 (nineteen years ago)

Haha, I just remembered this guy at a New Year's Eve party I met up with deej at, at like 3 AM. He was apparently telling a group of people in the kitchen about how he was bi-curious, and somehow everyone knew to direct him to me (? despite the fact that deej was like the only person I knew there?) -- and so he's telling me about how he thinks it would be interesting to fool around with a guy, but he isn't sure, etc. And he's tall and rosy-cheeked and very charming-looking and so after a few minutes I ask him if he wants to make out. And he looks sort of embarrassed and begs off. And I'm like, okay, well, what do you want me to do with this information then?

― jaymc (jaymc), Thursday, 6 April 2006 20:14 (nineteen years ago)

jay, did you punch him out and take his coke?

― Alfred, Lord Sotosyn (Alfred Soto), Thursday, 6 April 2006 20:17 (nineteen years ago)

Natch.

― jaymc (jaymc), Thursday, 6 April 2006 20:18 (nineteen years ago)

Coca Cola has no such effect on me.

― JTS (JTS), Thursday, 6 April 2006 21:07 (nineteen years ago)

Oh.

― JTS (JTS), Thursday, 6 April 2006 21:08 (nineteen years ago)

Jaymc, why on earth did you ask?

― Casuistry (Chris P), Thursday, 6 April 2006 22:27 (nineteen years ago)

Because it was New Year's and we were both drunk and he was cute and I figured there might've been a reason he was telling me all this. Seems pretty obvious to me.

― jaymc (jaymc), Thursday, 6 April 2006 22:29 (nineteen years ago)

because gay guys can get laid whenever

uhhhh...

― joseph (joseph), Thursday, 6 April 2006 22:37 (nineteen years ago)

seriously wtf is with this image straight/bi-desperate guys have about gays where they think their life is like "god i just have guys flying at me EVERYWHERE and i'm always sexually satisfied and have it so much better than you poor blue-balled heteros do!"??

― joseph (joseph), Thursday, 6 April 2006 22:44 (nineteen years ago)

You only have to go through something like that with somebody once to know you'll never do it again (with luck).

yeah, my ego and confidence in my sexuality (if that makes sense) is far too fragile to do this again. oh well!

― phil-two (phil-two), Thursday, 6 April 2006 22:48 (nineteen years ago)

well, to be honest, it is a lot easier to get laid if you're a gay guy. i mean, if you REALLY wanted to just suck some cock or pound away at an anonymous hole, you could always just go to like a bathhouse or something. do these still exist? or backrooms of bars called like the manhole or the eagle.

― phil-two (phil-two), Thursday, 6 April 2006 22:49 (nineteen years ago)

there's baths on st. mark's still, tho i have no idea if they're anything like nyc baths in the 70s (i'm guessing not).

i dunno. when i was single i feel like i couldn't "get laid whenever" if i tried!

― joseph (joseph), Thursday, 6 April 2006 22:51 (nineteen years ago)

i loved that michael musto column when he went to that sexclub

― phil-two (phil-two), Thursday, 6 April 2006 22:52 (nineteen years ago)

People with little or no actual contact with minorities harboring really weird beliefs about them non-shockah.

― Michael Daddino (epicharmus), Thursday, 6 April 2006 22:58 (nineteen years ago)

Phil, this was an insecurity/coke issue, not a bi/closetted issue at all, IMHO.

If you were straight, this could have been a strung out freaky girl.

If this guy was gay, he still could have been a strung out freak.

Point being, I'm sorry you had to deal with a coked-out insecure case. :( but bisexuality in general has nothing to do with this encounter, imho. It's just this specific dude who happened to be straight/bi/gay or something.

― DOQQUN (donut), Thursday, 6 April 2006 23:10 (nineteen years ago)

true enough, michael. i just think it's strange/amusing.

― joseph (joseph), Thursday, 6 April 2006 23:12 (nineteen years ago)

god I almost forgot about the time several years ago i slept with a bi guy i met at a bar. afterwards, he got all anxious and was like "oh im much much more into asian girls. do you know gong li? she's one foxy lady. boy would i love to get into her, you know what i mean?".... "oh, uh, yeah, definitely."... "i mean you're ok, but i would much rather kiss an asian girl"... "gee, thanks"... "hey, you dont have aids do you? i mean, i have my wife and kids to think about" .. "wtf? wife and kids???" ... "yeah, im married to a woman. i love her dearly and wouldn't want to give her any diseases"... ugh.

― phil-two (phil-two), Thursday, 6 April 2006 23:14 (nineteen years ago)

donut, oh no i mean im not saying anything bad about bi-sexual people. some of my best friends are bi!!!! its just not that fun when you have to deal with the insecurities of guys experimenting/discovering/whatever their bi-sexuality.

― phil-two (phil-two), Thursday, 6 April 2006 23:21 (nineteen years ago)

It's a challenge and, sure, awkward to deal with somebody with sexuality issues at all in such a situation, but sometimes those challenges are very rewarding (and not just FO TEH SEX either.)... I just don't want you to be scared of people with issues because I think this guy had additional mutually exclusive issues which should be highly stressed. I wouldn't want to even meet this guy to just talk about the weather in a cafe (from the way you're describing him.)

― DOQQUN (donut), Thursday, 6 April 2006 23:40 (nineteen years ago)

What's a party if I'm not late to it?
In answer to the original question: No, though for years there lots of people expected me to be (including you, phil; don't think I believe your oh-wow-I-don't-remember-that-I-must-have-been-really-wasted story for a minute). Actually, that whole time I totally wished I was; I was seriously hard-up there for a while, but just couldn't get around this pesky affinity for girl-ass.

― Pork Cheops (willpie), Friday, 7 April 2006 01:28 (nineteen years ago)

Jaymc, you didn't understand my question. Why on earth did you ask?

― Casuistry (Chris P), Friday, 7 April 2006 02:19 (nineteen years ago)

its just not that fun when you have to deal with the insecurities of guys experimenting/discovering/whatever their bi-sexuality.

You could have dropped the "bi-" part there, perhaps.

― Casuistry (Chris P), Friday, 7 April 2006 02:20 (nineteen years ago)

N.B. I am not surprised that Jaymc misread what I said in the way he did.

― Casuistry (Chris P), Friday, 7 April 2006 02:25 (nineteen years ago)

Of course baths still exist. I live 2 blocks from one. And there's Steamworks in Boystown.

― WhiskeyTangoFoxtrot (unclejessjess), Friday, 7 April 2006 03:44 (nineteen years ago)

Wait, are you saying why did I ask instead of just planting one on him?

― jaymc (jaymc), Friday, 7 April 2006 04:20 (nineteen years ago)

Yes.

There's a bath about ten blocks from me, and I'm glad it's there, but I'll never go.

― Casuistry (Chris P), Friday, 7 April 2006 04:24 (nineteen years ago)

Well, for one thing, he was tall.

― jaymc (jaymc), Friday, 7 April 2006 04:26 (nineteen years ago)

I'd bi that for a dollar

― latebloomer: someone's been drinking my youth! (latebloomer), Friday, 7 April 2006 04:26 (nineteen years ago)

I just don't want you to be scared of people with issues because I think this guy had additional mutually exclusive issues which should be highly stressed. I just don't want you to be scared of people with issues because I think this guy had additional mutually exclusive issues which should be highly stressed.

but im not confident enough in my own sexuality to deal with the insecurities of others. but i just had a fantastic sushi dinner, so im no longer depressed. its amazing what some kumamoto oysters, uni, and o-toro will do to one's mood. oh and 2 bottles of sake. But you might be right about the issues thing. he's jewish, and his mother has a masters in psychology. double whammy.

Of course baths still exist. I live 2 blocks from one

haha, you live by man's country on clark?

― phil-two (phil-two), Friday, 7 April 2006 04:42 (nineteen years ago)

including you, phil; don't think I believe your oh-wow-I-don't-remember-that-I-must-have-been-really-wasted story for a minute

oh yeah, that.

― phil-two (phil-two), Friday, 7 April 2006 04:58 (nineteen years ago)

I do live by Man's Country. I went to Clark's on Clark last night and found a nice enormous black dude who's in his 4th year of med school (psychiatry).

― WhiskeyTangoFoxtrot (unclejessjess), Friday, 7 April 2006 05:01 (nineteen years ago)

Sorry, I meant for there to be a segue between those ideas.

I live on Argyle at Magnolia (near Broadway).

Phil we should go get a drink. At Man's Country.

― WhiskeyTangoFoxtrot (unclejessjess), Friday, 7 April 2006 05:03 (nineteen years ago)

ohhh! neat that vietnamese bakery that has the banh mi. the one with the eiffel tower on the sign? i love that place.

i guess we can have semen martinis at man's country.

― phil-two (phil-two), Friday, 7 April 2006 05:06 (nineteen years ago)

I'm incapable of saying what I mean.

I live very close to the gayest block in Chicago. Gayer than anything in Boystown. There's T's, MC, Clark's, The Eagle, and Banana Video all right there.

And next time you're in town, we can go get a drink. I was too tired and hung over the last time you were here and on ILX trying to get someone to go out.

― WhiskeyTangoFoxtrot (unclejessjess), Friday, 7 April 2006 05:07 (nineteen years ago)

ohhh! neat that vietnamese bakery that has the banh mi. the one with the eiffel tower on the sign? i love that place.

What about it? It's about a block away.

Semen martinis sound great about right now. Though I've had more semen in the past couple of days than I know what to do with.

― WhiskeyTangoFoxtrot (unclejessjess), Friday, 7 April 2006 05:08 (nineteen years ago)

oh nothing. i just love their roast pork sandwiches.

― phil-two (phil-two), Friday, 7 April 2006 05:17 (nineteen years ago)

It's called Ba Le.

I hate pho.

That whole neighborhood stinks of weird cooking flesh. Like boiling meat. Like boiling fur.

I found a chicken foot at the corner of Argyle and Broadway once. I used it as a landmark to give a friend directions.

― WhiskeyTangoFoxtrot (unclejessjess), Friday, 7 April 2006 05:21 (nineteen years ago)

Did that happen bi-accident?

Sorry, I was just leaving.

If you are a retard you might think this was funny.

― Leonardo, Friday, 7 April 2006 05:29 (nineteen years ago)

jellus much?

― electric sound of jim (and why not) (electricsound), Friday, 7 April 2006 05:36 (nineteen years ago)

true enough, michael. i just think it's strange/amusing.

Uh, yeah, that came out more dickish than intended, sorry.

― Michael Daddino (epicharmus), Friday, 7 April 2006 10:22 (nineteen years ago)

"seriously wtf is with this image straight/bi-desperate guys have about gays where they think their life is like "god i just have guys flying at me EVERYWHERE and i'm always sexually satisfied and have it so much better than you poor blue-balled heteros do!"??"

If you're gay and have no selection criteria it's piss-easy to find sex.

If you're gay and have stringent selection criteria it's not so easy.

Where straight and bi-desperate guys get confused is that they assume that guys who are attracted to men are attracted to every man.

(but still, I think it generally is easier to get sex as a gay guy)

― Tim Finney (Tim Finney), Friday, 7 April 2006 10:59 (nineteen years ago)

The problem for straight men is they have to somehow persuade a woman to have sex with them - and take a look at most men, I mean, would you?

― Dadaismus (Dada), Friday, 7 April 2006 11:07 (nineteen years ago)

because gay guys can get laid whenever

Do you know any gay guys over 40? or over 30 who aren't gym bunnies?

jaymc, one more Awkward Bi Makeout Story and I'm gonna hop a Greyhound to Chicago and lock a chastity belt over your mouth.

No, semen martinis do not sound great, but if anyone wants to get a Cumshot at the Cattyshack in Brooklyn beforeI get kicked out of Park Slope, holla.

― Dr Morbius (Dr Morbius), Friday, 7 April 2006 12:26 (nineteen years ago)

the lesbo bar?

― phil-two (phil-two), Friday, 7 April 2006 16:37 (nineteen years ago)

lets have a fap at a gay bar, and invite everyone we suspect to be bi-desperate

― phil-two (phil-two), Friday, 7 April 2006 16:39 (nineteen years ago)

jaymc, one more Awkward Bi Makeout Story and I'm gonna hop a Greyhound to Chicago and lock a chastity belt over your mouth.

Ha, Dr. M -- I wish I had more awkward bi makeout stories! (I really don't think I've shared that many!)

― jaymc (jaymc), Friday, 7 April 2006 16:39 (nineteen years ago)

They'll fit in OK... Wednesday night is OINK! for men at Cattyshack.

phil, did I see you at Metropolitan the night of the magazine party? before SXSW?

― Dr Morbius (Dr Morbius), Friday, 7 April 2006 16:40 (nineteen years ago)

Wednesday night is OINK! for men at Cattyshack.
yikes, is it a sexpig party? though i couldnt imagine that many oh those kinda guys living in park slope.

phil, did I see you at Metropolitan the night of the magazine party? before SXSW
was this the butt magazine thing? no, actually, i haven't been to metropolitan in a year or so.

― phil-two (phil-two), Friday, 7 April 2006 16:42 (nineteen years ago)

Dr. M is totally one of my top ILXors I've never met but would like to, btw.

― jaymc (jaymc), Friday, 7 April 2006 16:43 (nineteen years ago)

you are such a cocktease

― phil-two (phil-two), Friday, 7 April 2006 16:43 (nineteen years ago)

I've met you, Phil.

― jaymc (jaymc), Friday, 7 April 2006 16:49 (nineteen years ago)

hahaha, phil OTM! jaymc I'd be blushing if I didn't have that effect on so many others (incl the ones who wanna hit me). thx.

Metropolitan gets a lot more fun once the patio and barbecue are in season, tho I still hit most of the Gag! new-wave Saturdays.

Nah, there's not much piggysex at the Cattyshack thing, although the side room upstairs is kept dark and semi-curtained for such things; most guys don't go back there. (Of course, I did meet a nice actor from San Francisco there on Thanksgiving Eve.)

― Dr Morbius (Dr Morbius), Friday, 7 April 2006 16:51 (nineteen years ago)

Was his name Mr. Sean Penn?

― jaymc (jaymc), Friday, 7 April 2006 16:54 (nineteen years ago)

No, more relaxed.

xpost

(...but there IS a long-running sexpig party elsewhere in the Slope. Lots of out-of-nabe commuters tho. I mean so I've heard.)

― Dr Morbius (Dr Morbius), Friday, 7 April 2006 16:55 (nineteen years ago)

lets have a fap at a gay bar, and invite everyone we suspect to be bi-desperate

i'd do this (with the condition that it not be held at boysroom. urgh.)

isn't there a bar in brooklyn with a bocce court that has a gay night every once in awhile?

― joseph (joseph), Friday, 7 April 2006 16:58 (nineteen years ago)

Oh man, that bocce bar ... too cutesy-icky -- but I hadn't heard they did any gay nights.

I know the GOTH bar in the Slope has! (Lucky 13)

― Dr Morbius (Dr Morbius), Friday, 7 April 2006 17:00 (nineteen years ago)

i want gay fap. :( maybe next time i'm in nyc.

providence gay scene = weak

― elmo argonaut (allocryptic), Friday, 7 April 2006 17:01 (nineteen years ago)

The closest Chicago has come to having a gay FAP was the time that me, Jesse, Kenan, and Casuistry went to Big Chicks about a month ago.

― jaymc (jaymc), Friday, 7 April 2006 17:02 (nineteen years ago)

who was in the middle?

― phil-two (phil-two), Friday, 7 April 2006 17:05 (nineteen years ago)

i'll go pretty much anywhere that doesn't rely on boring, vulgar, unfunny drag-queens (how redundant, i know) for "entertainment" and "local color".

― elmo argonaut (allocryptic), Friday, 7 April 2006 17:07 (nineteen years ago)

Jesse and Chris had gotten there first, and I think when Kenan and I arrived we flanked them.

― jaymc (jaymc), Friday, 7 April 2006 17:15 (nineteen years ago)

no, i meant in the conga line of anal sex afterwards

― phil-two (phil-two), Friday, 7 April 2006 17:17 (nineteen years ago)

Oh.

― jaymc (jaymc), Friday, 7 April 2006 17:20 (nineteen years ago)

anyhow, ok, yeah, lets go to metropolitan. or fun. or phoenix?

― phil-two (phil-two), Friday, 7 April 2006 17:31 (nineteen years ago)

Chicago seems like the hotbed of repressed sodomic longing.

― Alfred, Lord Sotosyn (Alfred Soto), Friday, 7 April 2006 17:56 (nineteen years ago)

Phil, you don't even like anal sex.

― jaymc (jaymc), Friday, 7 April 2006 17:57 (nineteen years ago)

no, but watching the four of you get into a choo-choo-train position would be pretty entertaining!

― phil-two (phil-two), Friday, 7 April 2006 17:59 (nineteen years ago)

http://www.skunktrain.com/images_promotional/engine_large.jpg

― Alfred, Lord Sotosyn (Alfred Soto), Friday, 7 April 2006 18:02 (nineteen years ago)

t/s: "caboose on the man train" vs. "bottom of the scrotum pole"

― elmo argonaut (allocryptic), Friday, 7 April 2006 18:04 (nineteen years ago)

Metropolitan is the only NY gay bar I don't find unbearable on the weekends anymore (tho Nowhere and Phoenix can be OK on the weeknights), but there's a bunch I never go to.

The Chicago bars in Wrigleyville could use some repression.

I'm surprised no one has posted "you can't buy love, but you can bi desperation."

― Dr Morbius (Dr Morbius), Friday, 7 April 2006 18:07 (nineteen years ago)

That's the theme of Miami's indie-boy clubs.

― Alfred, Lord Sotosyn (Alfred Soto), Friday, 7 April 2006 18:11 (nineteen years ago)

I just found an e-mail from about a year ago where Kelsey says she doesn't find that many guys on ILX all that attractive and then I proceed to list a good half-dozen.

― jaymc (jaymc), Friday, 7 April 2006 18:38 (nineteen years ago)

Now you've forced me to consult the photo thread.

― Alfred, Lord Sotosyn (Alfred Soto), Friday, 7 April 2006 18:43 (nineteen years ago)

OK, what's a fap?

Phil, you don't like anal sex? Not at all?

― WhiskeyTangoFoxtrot (unclejessjess), Friday, 7 April 2006 19:33 (nineteen years ago)

Does no one believe in the allure of mystery?

Well I'l likely be at Metropolitan for nu-wave Saturday around midnight-2; prolly wearing my Flipper shirt. Say hi if ya want (weather sposed to be cold n damp tho).

― Dr Morbius (Dr Morbius), Friday, 7 April 2006 19:57 (nineteen years ago)

whiskey, FAP = ILX code for "hey, let's go get drinks" (stands for Fancy A Pint?).

― joseph (joseph), Friday, 7 April 2006 20:22 (nineteen years ago)

anyone been to stephin merritt's weekly DJ stint at beauty bar? my friend says it's a big bear night. (or is it a bear bar in general?)

― joseph (joseph), Friday, 7 April 2006 20:26 (nineteen years ago)

I haven't gone yet. Maybe Monday. (I don't think the Beauty Bar is real bearish, Nowhere -- where he did his 'short guy' night -- moreso)

― Dr Morbius (Dr Morbius), Friday, 7 April 2006 20:32 (nineteen years ago)

I would hve thought it was Merritt himself that brought about the bear-ness...?

― Laurel (Laurel), Friday, 7 April 2006 20:35 (nineteen years ago)

BB is a hipster bar in general, isn't it?

― Laurel (Laurel), Friday, 7 April 2006 20:35 (nineteen years ago)

yeah, stache is held there. that's all skinny hipster dweebs.

― joseph (joseph), Friday, 7 April 2006 20:37 (nineteen years ago)

I want to hear more about Jesse's run-in with gigantic boobs.

― Jordan (Jordan), Friday, 7 April 2006 20:43 (nineteen years ago)

http://img397.imageshack.us/img397/7978/owlbuttsecks7tu.jpg

― phil d. (Phil D.), Saturday, 8 April 2006 00:20 (nineteen years ago)

Ha, Dr. M -- I wish I had more awkward bi makeout stories! (I really don't think I've shared that many!)

You've made out with multiples o' dudes more than have I. (Can't syntax that sentence any better than I can compete with jaymc's gayscapades.)

― Eric H. (Eric H.), Saturday, 8 April 2006 02:07 (nineteen years ago)

i've never really had a bi-desperate moment myself, but someone exerted their bi-desperation on me once and it was maybe the most awkward experience of my life.

― joseph (joseph), Saturday, 8 April 2006 06:27 (nineteen years ago)

The girl had enormous boobs. I touched them. She told me that it was inevitable. The end.

What's wrong with butt sex?

― WhiskeyTangoFoxtrot (unclejessjess), Saturday, 8 April 2006 07:16 (nineteen years ago)

haha

― electric sound of jim (and why not) (electricsound), Saturday, 8 April 2006 07:18 (nineteen years ago)

but someone exerted their bi-desperation on me once and it was maybe the most awkward experience of my life.

ooh, what happenned

― phil-two (phil-two), Saturday, 8 April 2006 15:40 (nineteen years ago)

Eric, have the Twin Cities gotten all undersexed?

― Dr Morbius (Dr Morbius), Saturday, 8 April 2006 16:50 (nineteen years ago)

I've only made out with four guys.

― jaymc (jaymc), Saturday, 8 April 2006 17:03 (nineteen years ago)

But it was all at the same time, so.

― Casuistry (Chris P), Saturday, 8 April 2006 18:10 (nineteen years ago)

i'm pretty sure i wrote about this elsewhere, but in high school, i was co-prez of the school's GSA, and there was this one kid who was sort of vocally against the group's existence. one day he IMs me under a pseudonym, asking me repeatedly to sleep with him, and then tells me his real name and asks if we could meet in person just so i could talk to him about being closet-bi or whatever. he also said to me that "if you like, you can touch my body, i'd be comfortable with that." against my better judgment i met him during my lunch period in front of the 2nd-floor bathroom. he said "well, here i am," in that sort of expectant "so, are we going to fool around or what?" way. i couldn't even look him in the face.

― joseph (joseph), Saturday, 8 April 2006 18:26 (nineteen years ago)

oh haha! whats GSA?

― phil-two (phil-two), Saturday, 8 April 2006 18:33 (nineteen years ago)

Gay-Straight Alliance, I think?

― Michael Daddino (epicharmus), Saturday, 8 April 2006 18:35 (nineteen years ago)

yeah. i have no idea if ours is still even in existence, though. the year i was prez it was mostly kids from my grade involved.

― joseph (joseph), Saturday, 8 April 2006 18:45 (nineteen years ago)

are there straight guys who join this GSA??

― phil-two (phil-two), Saturday, 8 April 2006 19:05 (nineteen years ago)

The ones who are "bi-desperate."

― Alfred, Lord Sotosyn (Alfred Soto), Saturday, 8 April 2006 19:24 (nineteen years ago)

So was he hot?

― Casuistry (Chris P), Saturday, 8 April 2006 19:40 (nineteen years ago)

yeah joesph, you should myspace him and see if hes on there. and if he looks like a total crystal meth circuit boi now or not

― phil-two (phil-two), Saturday, 8 April 2006 19:43 (nineteen years ago)

Eric, have the Twin Cities gotten all undersexed?
-- Dr Morbius, April 8th, 2006 12:50 PM.

I've only made out with four guys.
-- jaymc, April 8th, 2006 1:03 PM.

Wow. I was right. The multiple of guys you've made out with compared to me is exactly one. I'm glad I don't represent the TCs.

― Eric H. (Eric H.), Saturday, 8 April 2006 21:58 (nineteen years ago)

casuistry: not particularly and in any case he was a CREEP so no shot.

we had a couple of straight guys in our GSA, and many of the other ones in my area had some too.

― joseph (joseph), Saturday, 8 April 2006 22:09 (nineteen years ago)

just did a myspace run (instead of doing research) and no luck. i did, however, find that:

a) i would not be shedding any tears if i didn't see 95% of the kids i went to high school with ever again,

b) there seems to be only three gay people who went to my high school ever, and

c) myspace is migraine-inducing. oof.

― joseph (joseph), Saturday, 8 April 2006 22:16 (nineteen years ago)

Do you have standards or something, Eric?

― Casuistry (Chris P), Sunday, 9 April 2006 00:52 (nineteen years ago)

No, everyone else does. < / rimshot >

― Eric H. (Eric H.), Sunday, 9 April 2006 02:46 (nineteen years ago)

Actually, I did bump into a guy that I probably would've rebuffed this evening in the downstairs record room on the Lake St. Cheapo. He was half my height, twice my weight, kept following me around and looking in all the bins right next to me as though he wanted to make sure that I wouldn't snatch anything he needed, kept clearing what sounded like hydrochloric gel out of his throat, kept licking the bottom of his chin, kept ripping musty vinyl ass as he sniffed the spines of the records, and said the title of each record he picked up aloud, phonetically.

― Eric H. (Eric H.), Sunday, 9 April 2006 02:51 (nineteen years ago)

Hrm.

― Casuistry (Chris P), Sunday, 9 April 2006 06:24 (nineteen years ago)

hawt!

― Dr Morbius (Dr Morbius), Sunday, 9 April 2006 17:09 (nineteen years ago)

how was metropolitan? i was going to go and try to find you since im walking distance, but i didnt want to have to go up to a potential stranger and go, hey, are you, uhh, dr morbius?

― phil-two (phil-two), Sunday, 9 April 2006 17:28 (nineteen years ago)

haha, it was OK. I went late (1:30-close). I had a chat with a downcast Brit Bjork fan who hated her Matthew Barney film. And on the TV the program included Chicago Gay Pride footage from 1976!!

(and I told u what shirt id wear, silly)

― Dr Morbius (Dr Morbius), Sunday, 9 April 2006 17:46 (nineteen years ago)

what happens if there are two people there wearing a flipper shirt? then when?

hm, ok, youre right, my fault. next time.

― phil-two (phil-two), Sunday, 9 April 2006 17:55 (nineteen years ago)

what are the odds of TWO Flipper shirts in 2006?

Yeah, one would think the next dozen or so Gag! nights at Metropolitan will be warmer and less damp than Saturday.

― Dr Morbius (Dr Morbius), Monday, 10 April 2006 16:55 (nineteen years ago)

oh, "then when" was supposed to be "then what".

i really should try to make it to metropolitan. all my friends are girls and straight dudes who want to fuck them. and ilxers. how am i supposed to meet hot dudes this way

― phil-two (phil-two), Monday, 10 April 2006 17:35 (nineteen years ago)

Stay away from ilxors, for one.

― Eric H. (Eric H.), Monday, 10 April 2006 17:37 (nineteen years ago)

Oh weird. I totally skimmed over the part where you already said that bit about ilxers. We were on the same wavelength there, et al.

― Eric H. (Eric H.), Monday, 10 April 2006 17:38 (nineteen years ago)

all my friends are girls and straight dudes who want to fuck them. and ilxers. how am i supposed to meet hot dudes this way

OTM :( :(

― elmo argonaut (allocryptic), Monday, 10 April 2006 17:40 (nineteen years ago)

Eric, if we thought you were a typical rep of the TCs and weren't cold-weather wimps, we'd all relocate there. :p

― Dr Morbius (Dr Morbius), Monday, 10 April 2006 17:45 (nineteen years ago)

I'm hardly a great spokesman for the hopes of gay romance in the Cities. But I like a lot about nearly everything else here, cold weather included.

― Eric H. (Eric H.), Monday, 10 April 2006 17:49 (nineteen years ago)

Eric -- my pals in the Twin Cities seemed to have a lot of gay friends. Ask A.L. :)

― jaymc (jaymc), Monday, 10 April 2006 17:52 (nineteen years ago)

I do too. I just habitually keep them "just friends."

― Eric H. (Eric H.), Monday, 10 April 2006 17:53 (nineteen years ago)

I should ask AL out on a date. ;-)

― Eric H. (Eric H.), Monday, 10 April 2006 17:53 (nineteen years ago)

There's some real bi-desperation.

― Eric H. (Eric H.), Monday, 10 April 2006 17:53 (nineteen years ago)

So this now becomes another The Midwest Is So Hawt thread.

― Alfred, Lord Sotosyn (Alfred Soto), Monday, 10 April 2006 17:53 (nineteen years ago)

I should ask AL out on a date. ;-)

Ha. She and Kelsey (who mostly posts on the Chicago thread) are going out tonight, I think.

― jaymc (jaymc), Monday, 10 April 2006 17:55 (nineteen years ago)

I think I'm going to the Varsity Theatre to pretend some more that the Oak Street Theatre can be saved.

― Eric H. (Eric H.), Monday, 10 April 2006 18:00 (nineteen years ago)

Ha poor andrew....

― Fight the Real Enemy -- Tasti D-Lite (ex machina), Monday, 10 April 2006 18:02 (nineteen years ago)

I like Sam Delaney's suspicion that many bisexual/homosexual men have a heterophobic personality trait that's equally (or more strongly) influential to their inability to get laid than any lack of sexual partners.

― remy (x Jeremy), Monday, 10 April 2006 19:13 (nineteen years ago)

I should ask AL out on a date. ;-)
-- Eric H. (ephende...), April 10th, 2006.

http://narrowcast.blogspot.com

― -+-+--+++-+, Monday, 10 April 2006 19:25 (nineteen years ago)

I hate when I buy fat free cheese. It ruins my broccoli-cheddar soup.

― Eric H. (Eric H.), Tuesday, 11 April 2006 01:49 (nineteen years ago)

Remy: What?

― Casuistry (Chris P), Tuesday, 11 April 2006 03:48 (nineteen years ago)

"I like Sam Delaney's suspicion that many bisexual/homosexual men have a heterophobic personality trait that's equally (or more strongly) influential to their inability to get laid than any lack of sexual partners. "

??????? Can someone unpack this for me?

― Tim Finney (Tim Finney), Tuesday, 11 April 2006 23:24 (nineteen years ago)

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