I Fucked Ann Coulter In the Ass, Hard.

On the other hand, I shudder in horror at what actually-fannish Coulter fanfic might be like.

*whimpers slightly* Raggett-ism, surely. ;-)

This is great.

It's supreme poor taste, and really funny.

also, i can't relate at all to the concept of hate-fucking.

But she's the one doing the hate fucking! He not full of hate for her, he's full of liberalism!

Once she caught her breath, she wiped her mouth, stood, and took me by the hand.
‘Let’s go to the bathroom.’
‘Why?’
She seemed surprised I had to ask. Her tone was that of someone reminding another of something too obvious to need mention.
‘Uh, so I can get in the tub and you can piss all over me?’

I this guy British? Note the single scare quotes. The idea of people from other countries hating her this much is telling.

-- Mickey (modestmicke...), April 28th, 2005.

I just didn't think it was funny.

because it suggests laziness. with such a gimmick, you surely need to go to town with it in order for it to work.

for example, the Incredible Hulk's Blog

and oh my god i just realized i made a hideous pun

give it time, my dear, give it time.

ha ha

sorry

(ha)

Yeah. That.

the general squid man says, "IT'S A TRAP!!!"

i'll admit, i laughed at first. pass the cave juice, i art stupid sometimes. i learn tho!
m.

Loved the analogy about the second graders, though. I dunno... I guess what I thought was so funny about it was the political banter, not so much the sex. Although I do enjoy a good stupid dick joke, don't get me wrong.

xpost

That's not Op-Ed fodder, that's The Communist Manifesto. But point taken. I understand all that, and did the first time I read it, but I think what the people on this thread are objecting to is the overuse of objectification, so that it becomes actually frattish rather than a patrody of that. It crosses a line. I can see that, certainly.

google's not helping me find a link. this is like 8 or 9 years ago. i think word.com had something to do with it. could it be gone?
m.

1) There are people in the world who would not find this funny whether or not the target was a man, a woman, Sigfried and Roy, whatever. It just would be something they'd find disgusting and unamusing. That's a fair viewpoint to have.
2) The Rush Limbaugh point is also a valid one: there's a reason why websites like that don't exist but type in the name of any female celebrity and you'll invariably find a story like this about her.

Fair, yes. Also fair to make fun of how boring and humorless they are. A delightful thing to do, IMO.

type in the name of any female celebrity and you'll invariably find a story like this about her

That's overstating the case a bit, but I think I know what you're getting at. The "sexist" humor draws to closely on SEXIST humor for comfort.

And also because I madly click and post on every thread here, obv...

1: This isn't funny, it's kind of just gross, dude
2: WELL I LAUGHED AT IT AND I WANTED YOU TO LAUGH AT
IT TOO SO I WOULDN'T FEEL GUILTY FOR LAUGHING AT IT 
WTF IS YOUR PROBLEM ARE YOU THE PC POLICE
1: No, it just isn't funny at all
2: LISTEN I'M SURE IT'S WORTHWHILE ON SOME LEVEL AND 
NOT COMPLETE TRASH, I MEAN I DID LAUGH AT IT
1: I guess this one part is sort of funny but overall
it's just really lame
2: ARGH

If he fantasized about her political assasination, I could sypathise, though I do really want to see Tom Delay slowly devoured by giant bugs from Mars first.

Do you seriously mean that? I feel sorry for the person who finds this story thought provoking...

I remember the spelling by thinking of a baguette. Or, alternatively of a Ray-lette.

When a blonde has manhands, I call them "nazi hands".

PRE

― Open your eyes; you can fly! (ex machina), Friday, 29 April 2005 01:43 (twenty years ago)

I’ll argue the merits of the fictional piece upfront. It’s creative, contains a solid 10th grade vocabulary--rich with words like “splooey” and “unsettling scrutiny.” I can even understand how it is both entertaining and funny. One of the people I love most in the world, my boyfriend, finds it hilarious and he even posted a link to it on his blog. Heck, at face value, it is at the very least an attempt to mock someone I find detestable.

So, why don’t I just lighten up and laugh at the joke? I mean, our generation is ripe with humor that is ‘off color.’ Clearly, finding offense to this item of humor is the sign that I am too serious and incapable of 'getting the joke.’

Under the guise of fan fiction, this guy wrote a very detailed account of meeting Ann Coulter in a grocery store and taking her back to his apartment to have anal sex. She is most turned on by their conservative-liberal repartee and begs to hear politically contrary talking points throughout their fucking.

I have to admit that initially, before reading the piece, I thought ‘that’s funny.’ It was a very smug feeling. The idea of a political pundit who preaches such despicable nonsense getting ‘what she deserves’ briefly entered my head.

And then, I thought about the feeling of frustration I would feel during the Clinton administration. Rather than addressing the merits of her political standings, a majority of conservative liberal-Clinton-bashing centered around her gender. It was commonplace to call her butch and question her sexuality. Partly because I sided with many of the liberal ideologies of Hillary Clinton and partly because I felt offended, I decided that such tactics were nothing short of contemptible. So, then, why would I make an exception for a woman I don’t agree with, politically?

A friend of mine made me reconsider my offense. He said, “I mean, fantasizing about consensual sex with Ann Coulter doesn't seem that bad to me, in the grand scheme of things.” Let me first address the “grand scheme of things.” He is right. The publication of this blog piece and its ensuing praise did not cause the world of gender roles to crumble into the sea of equality. But aren’t these sort of things always nuanced? The explicitly egregious things are always easy to spot and ignore. It is the humor of it, the entertainment of it, the delicately present messages that leave us enjoying messages without considering their impact. It is the incontestable nature of politics to degrade women through sex. Why? Because, well, it IS funny. Funny Is good natured, right? They’re laughing. Why aren’t you?

Secondly, I would like to address the “consensual” element of it. It needs to be said, upfront, that this is NOT a sex-fan-fic piece. It is, at its very core, a slanderous stab at a woman who is very easy to dislike. It is clear in its title, “I Fucked Ann Coulter in the Ass, Hard.” I won’t buy the argument that this guy, no matter how liberal his views on anal sex, is not aware of the demeaning nature of such an act. He is quite aware. It is clear in the comments section of his entry. As my other friend commented sarcastically, "the reason she is so assertive in her public life is because obviously she likes to be dominated in private, because everything she ever does in her life is strategy regarding how to properly have sex." We, men and women, will quickly dismiss the intrinsic worth of a woman's political views, because she is always first a sexual object. And that's what ultimately makes it funny--demeaning a woman who blue states are sick and tired of hearing from. It is almost a cause we're fighting for and her slighted gender is simply a small cost of righting wrongs. Her vile nature brings us back to the playground. We want to push back.

Doing so in the context of what makes her disgusting--addressing the political issues and their lack of merit--would be fair. That’s why the Daily Show is so good. We’re satisfied when someone pushes back on the playground. But what is lost in a piece like this is the method. And for me, degrading a woman through sex is not only not funny, it is completely offensive.

of course not. but there is something intrinsically demeaning about how it's used in this story. after all, that's why it's funny. she seems above it, but it exposes her for what she really wants: gettin' fucked in the ass by a liberal (HARD).

2: I don't see how this is a piece about "degrading a woman through sex".

are you sure? it's shitting all over ann coulter via a piece of dirty fan-fic wherein the protag fucks her in the ass (HARD).

3: I don't think people mock Coulter because of her sex, but rather because she's astonishingly idiotic and sycophantic in a fashion that suggests that her opinion is for sale.

her politics are the reason for the defiling, but what is the technique behind the defiling itself? oh yeah, fucking her in the ass (HARD).

4: Switching genders and political leanings in the piece would not alter it's thrust. Substitute Al Franken for Coulter in this and it doesn't sacrifice too much humor.

somehow, i find that HARD to believe.

5: Draw a Pig.

hehe. pigs.

so because she asks for it, it's demeaning? or is it the "HARDness" that makes it demeaning? have you never had someone ask you to fuck them "HARD?" should one carefully time one's strokes lest the magical HARDness line be crossed and it turn from good fun to demeaning?

silly.

I mean, this is basically OTM, people. The people who are finding this offensive and not funny aren't doing it on the basis of "anal sex is inherently demeaning" or "sex stories are gross."

CAN ONE (1) PERSON EXPLAIN TO ME EXACTLY WHAT THIS IS SATIRING SO EXCELLENTLY? I MEAN I KNOW IT IS A "THOUGHT-PROVOKING ASSM STORY WITH ANN COULTER'S NAME AND QUOTES FROM THE COMMUNIST MANIFESTO SUBSTITUTED WHERE "HOT BLONDE SLUT JUST GAGGING FOR IT" AND "OH YEAH YOU LIKE MY ENORMOUS 27" COCK" NORMALLY WOULD BESATIRE" BUT I'M PRETTY DUMB, EXPLAIN IT BETTER FOR ME. FROM WHAT I HAVE READ, THE SATIRE IS AS FOLLOWS:

Ann Coulter, a pretty repressed and prudish seeming woman who is also kind of an intolerable bitch, actually wants to be fucked really hard and pissed on by a man who dislikes her vehemently while he espouses statements that run counter to Ann Coulter's stated beliefs. Written by A Man Who Dislikes Ann Coulter.

If you guys REALLY can't see the difference between this and, like, actual art and literature, and you REALLY can't understand why all the females upthread kind of cried foul on this (it's not the actual, literal content of the piece), then, yeah, here's some more really great satire and intelligent literature for you:
http://groups-beta.google.com/group/alt.sex.stories
"Cruel Man Rapes Virgin Daughter" sounds particularly insightful!!!!!!!! Up there with Kundera, serious.

i really don't care that what he wrote exists, and i really don't understand why it should upset anyone so much. if you don't find it funny chalk it up to that. if you think he was seriously angling for 'erotica,' chalk it up to people's fucked up and weird hangups. if you really think it was 'slanderous,' send a copy to ann coulter's agent and let them take it from there.

if you just want everyone who chuckled at any part of it to feel bad, i'm afraid that won't happen. if you just want to overreact and jump up and down and yell, though, keep it up.

Satire 1. a. A literary work in which human vice or folly is attacked through irony, derision, or wit.

'wit' is obviously debatable. derision, though...

and not some sort of activist organizing thing... right?

that's sort of what i'm trying to figure out. allyzay keeps reiterating her point without really explaining why it's necessary to do so. is it different from "actual art and literature?" clearly to her it is. i wouldn't exactly call it literature, but so? why bother continuously restating that in such a freaked-out way?

el sabor, you really need to get over yourself.

thanks! so should everyone else!