Sasha Frere-Jones' Radiohead review

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I found this website that accuses Sasha Frere-Jones of lying in his recent New Yorker concert review of Radiohead. Do you think this is true?

http://philosophypage.blogspot.com/2006/06/sasha-frere-jones.html

― B Mikes (B Mingus), Friday, 23 June 2006 16:02 (nineteen years ago)

You 'found' your own fucking website, did you?

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Friday, 23 June 2006 16:05 (nineteen years ago)

posted by B. Michael Payne : 9:31 AM

But you claim you found it! YOU LIAR!

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Friday, 23 June 2006 16:05 (nineteen years ago)

lock thread, it can't get any more perfect than this.

― aimee semple mcmansion (Jody Beth Rosen), Friday, 23 June 2006 16:06 (nineteen years ago)

a-hahahaha! dude!

― A Giant Mechanical Ant (The Giant Mechanical Ant), Friday, 23 June 2006 16:07 (nineteen years ago)

Ned, cut the dude some slack! Maybe he has some sort of massive head injury that causes him to have Memento-esque memory loss.

― GILLY'S BAGG'EAR VANCE OF COUPARI (Ex Leon), Friday, 23 June 2006 16:09 (nineteen years ago)

never mind that he posted this on ILE

― cutty (mcutt), Friday, 23 June 2006 16:10 (nineteen years ago)

Your Brazilname is "Paynão".

― jhoshea (scoopsnoodle), Friday, 23 June 2006 16:13 (nineteen years ago)

"i walk on rough ground"

― Forksclovetofu (Forksclovetofu), Friday, 23 June 2006 16:15 (nineteen years ago)

i also thought sasha fj was a woman for the longest time. just like i thought sasha of sasha and digweed fame was a particularly poncey looking butch dyke.

― gear (gear), Friday, 23 June 2006 16:20 (nineteen years ago)

pictured right

nice one

― A Giant Mechanical Ant (The Giant Mechanical Ant), Friday, 23 June 2006 16:21 (nineteen years ago)

Pictured right!

― nabisco (nabisco), Friday, 23 June 2006 16:25 (nineteen years ago)

P.S. "give a chance" can mean giving a chance (or another chance) in terms of approval and/or liking, not just in terms of listening, plus -- just for the record, and so you'll know why people might rag on you as this thread proceeds -- there is something massively lame about trying to publicize yourself or trying to shout your voice into some larger debate by randomly picking one of the more important figures in said debate and searching out some really ludicrous thing on which to (ooh, burn) Call Him Out. I would say there's nothing lamer than that, but one thing lamer than that would be when you do the same thing except your ludicrous thing turns out to hinge on your possibly not understanding the use of a fairly common English expression. Also, he's pictured on the left. Without a hat on!

― nabisco (nabisco), Friday, 23 June 2006 16:29 (nineteen years ago)

Oh, also lamer: doing all of the above but then posting it to ILE!

― nabisco (nabisco), Friday, 23 June 2006 16:30 (nineteen years ago)

i also thought sasha fj was a woman for the longest time.

He isn't but Dominique Leone is

― TS: Alan Stivell - A l'Olympia vs. Magma - Live/Hhaï (Dada), Friday, 23 June 2006 16:32 (nineteen years ago)

that sfj's radiohead mix is in chronological order shows (signifies, if you will) that he has not given radiohead a chance. if you were making a mix of a band you actually knew and liked would you ever group the songs by albums?

― jhoshea (scoopsnoodle), Friday, 23 June 2006 16:39 (nineteen years ago)

Dear B. Michael Payne: "Lying"? I do not think it means what you think it means. Please go back to school.

― Deric W. Haircare (Deric W. Haircare), Friday, 23 June 2006 16:44 (nineteen years ago)

That is the fucking dumbest thing I've ever read, B Mikes.

― mcd (mcd), Friday, 23 June 2006 16:45 (nineteen years ago)

More of the man's genius:

Geneaology

Wildeyed Welcome

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Friday, 23 June 2006 16:46 (nineteen years ago)

Please, no.

― mcd (mcd), Friday, 23 June 2006 16:48 (nineteen years ago)

Oh I really think you should.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Friday, 23 June 2006 16:50 (nineteen years ago)

Whether this mix "kills" can be debated. Whether this mix "kills" can be debated. Whether this mix "kills" can be debated. Whether this mix "kills" can be debated. Whether this mix "kills" can be debated. Whether this mix "kills" can be debated. Whether this mix "kills" can be debated. Whether this mix "kills" can be debated. Whether this mix "kills" can be debated. Whether this mix "kills" can be debated. Whether this mix "kills" can be debated. Whether this mix "kills" can be debated. Whether this mix "kills" can be debated. Whether this mix "kills" can be debated. Whether this mix "kills" can be debated. Whether this mix "kills" can be debated. Whether this mix "kills" can be debated. Whether this mix "kills" can be debated. Whether this mix "kills" can be debated. Whether this mix "kills" can be debated.

― Bea Arthur - Lost COmic GEnius ? (dubplatestyle), Friday, 23 June 2006 16:51 (nineteen years ago)

Also, friend, he says it is only "recently" that he thought them as worthy of "a chance." Since his mixtape includes HTTT (2003), and radiohead have been huge since 1993, i don't really see the discrepancy (in other words, 2003 is recently). The idea that "SFJ is lying" smacks strongly of unwarranted polemics. But whatever.

He ends both articles by licking Radiohead's asshole.

that's a trick.

― A Giant Mechanical Ant (The Giant Mechanical Ant), Friday, 23 June 2006 16:52 (nineteen years ago)

He's fond of the phrase. Thus from "Genealogy":

Personally, I think the New York Times licks John Updikes asshole a little too much. But what do I know? I don't review books, I just read them.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Friday, 23 June 2006 16:53 (nineteen years ago)

That said, here is my favorite bit so far:

Now the epoché will be a sort of quasi-nihilistic project to be carried out, or at least reported on, in this space. I think Jeff Mangum's music is important. and I < 3 Huckabees, funny enough, put everything into perspective.

Ah, yes.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Friday, 23 June 2006 16:54 (nineteen years ago)

Ah, we were all young and spunky once.

― NickB (NickB), Friday, 23 June 2006 16:54 (nineteen years ago)

Oh yes yes, don't get me wrong. I'm sure I said worse. But one must learn.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Friday, 23 June 2006 16:58 (nineteen years ago)

truly, the internet has revolutionized music criticism and the old guard is running scared

― Thomas Tallis (Tommy), Friday, 23 June 2006 17:00 (nineteen years ago)

hi, i was looking for blogs about John Updikes asshole and found yours. great job! maybe you would like to check out my site sometimes at
http://www.anus.com/ have a great day!

p.s. i am also a war widow and i make candles.

― scott seward (scott seward), Friday, 23 June 2006 17:02 (nineteen years ago)

you're a brave woman : )

― gear (gear), Friday, 23 June 2006 17:04 (nineteen years ago)

this guy is getting the tynan delong treatment!

kudos!

― cutty (mcutt), Friday, 23 June 2006 17:06 (nineteen years ago)

Hahahahaha, I thought the SAME thing.

Oh BTW, he's learned his lesson -- and he's posted to ILM!

Sasha Frere-Jones / Radiohead (!?)

Enjoy!

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Friday, 23 June 2006 17:07 (nineteen years ago)

http://i.i.com.com/cnwk.1d/sc/30984420-2-200-0.gif

― A Giant Mechanical Ant (The Giant Mechanical Ant), Friday, 23 June 2006 17:09 (nineteen years ago)

haha it's amazing how he managed not to read the entire Slate piece that preceded the mixtape where Sasha basically cut the band down for three days. oh wait, why am I bothering?

― Matos-Webster Dictionary (M Matos), Friday, 23 June 2006 17:11 (nineteen years ago)

― Offisa Pump (Rock Hardy), Friday, 23 June 2006 17:16 (nineteen years ago)

That's a great graphic. Thanks for the feedback (supra). This whole cheap, self-shilling marketing technique has some plusses and minuses to it, doesn't it.

― B Mikes (B Mingus), Friday, 23 June 2006 17:23 (nineteen years ago)

Matos, stop acting like that email wasn't a manifesto! You and your ideas of "context" and "chronology," I swear.

― mike h. (mike h.), Friday, 23 June 2006 17:26 (nineteen years ago)

In this record review of Hail to the Thief, which was published on Chuck Klosterman's and my birthday

― M@tt He1geson, Rendolent Ding-Dong (Matt Helgeson), Friday, 23 June 2006 17:28 (nineteen years ago)

Cheap, shrill self-marketing has a better chance of being effective when there's something worth marketing behind it, something rather grander than "I, most perceptive among music readers, have spotted a meaningless non-discrepancy in a years-old Slate dialogue."

Can we talk more about why you want to be important? Cuz here's the thing: even if you had some kind of hit snarky blog where you totally laid the smack down on SFJ and Christgau and Eddy and all sorts of stuff, you wouldn't get laid for it. You might get some feeling of accomplishment and importance for a little while, but then everyone would hate you and find discrepancies in your years-old posts, and you'd have really poor career prospects and no real money, and you might still be a bit of a sac de douche (you like French, I think), and it's like ... what's the point? You should learn an instrument and join a band, instead -- then people kind of expect you to be pretentious and shrill.

― nabisco (nabisco), Friday, 23 June 2006 17:31 (nineteen years ago)

x-post

Are you suggesting that this particular fact is in some way unimportant to the piece as a whole? If so, you are LYING.

― Deric W. Haircare (Deric W. Haircare), Friday, 23 June 2006 17:32 (nineteen years ago)

This website seems to suggest that the San Diego Padres are a baseball team worth talking about and I hear that the author is incredibly handsome.

― polyphonic (polyphonic), Friday, 23 June 2006 17:32 (nineteen years ago)

My man Chuck Klosterman

― CDDB (Dan Deluca), Friday, 23 June 2006 17:33 (nineteen years ago)

Also in a band context those sunglasses would be less of a problem.

― nabisco (nabisco), Friday, 23 June 2006 17:33 (nineteen years ago)

nitsuh is there some budding music critic big brothers and big sisters program i was unaware of?

― Bea Arthur - Lost COmic GEnius ? (dubplatestyle), Friday, 23 June 2006 17:35 (nineteen years ago)

That's what DeRo told me when he took me to the zoo.

― nabisco (nabisco), Friday, 23 June 2006 17:37 (nineteen years ago)

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v291/TheManthony/judgebone.jpg

― Zwan (miccio), Friday, 23 June 2006 17:39 (nineteen years ago)

Dude, moving your blog's sidebar to the other side of the page doesn't make "pictured right" any more correct.

xpost
Daaaamn, Nabisco! "Knives Out," to quote a really great song title by a really great band!

― Offisa Pump (Rock Hardy), Friday, 23 June 2006 17:39 (nineteen years ago)

I'd do the research next time to realize that a.) We're more negative than positive about shared-birthday boy Klosterman, and b.) We're more than versed with the sort of attitude you get when you spend your days writing blog entries "analyzing" music and film criticism, then set an entertaining standard:PFM is worth working over in critical and philosophical depth, while finding anything Kantian about X-Men 3 is apparently reaching.

We've already got ILM to be critical of critics, I don't need someone's musings spelled out elsewhere. Unless it's nabisco, I'd almost pay money for a blog of his insightful posts even if they'd all be the same length and equally succinct.

― mike h. (mike h.), Friday, 23 June 2006 17:39 (nineteen years ago)

you wouldn't get laid for it
NO YOU WOULD NOT. LADIES ARE YOU WITH ME?

Ladies?

...ladies?

Exactly.

― The Milkmaid (82375538-A) (The Milkmaid), Friday, 23 June 2006 17:40 (nineteen years ago)

OMG but you totally WILL get laid for those sort of antics in rock bands.

― you can email me if you wish to challenge the truth (nickalicious), Friday, 23 June 2006 17:52 (nineteen years ago)

Toooooooooooooooooootally.

― The Milkmaid (82375538-A) (The Milkmaid), Friday, 23 June 2006 17:54 (nineteen years ago)

Are you a Johnny, Mr. Payne?

― Colin Meeder (Mert), Friday, 23 June 2006 17:59 (nineteen years ago)

I know, I'm not knives-out here, I'm trying to help! That was sound advice up there, I think.

Plus I'm envious that he lives in Santa Fe. I miss the southwest.

― nabisco (nabisco), Friday, 23 June 2006 18:06 (nineteen years ago)

Join a band? He IS a band!

― Offisa Pump (Rock Hardy), Friday, 23 June 2006 18:11 (nineteen years ago)

Aha: "I'm reading for an M.A. at Saint John's College, Santa Fe..." A GI, then. Half a Johnny. The wrong half, it would appear.

― Colin Meeder (Mert), Friday, 23 June 2006 18:22 (nineteen years ago)

Pasta>>>>>>>>Heidegger>>>>>>>Speed Hump

― A Giant Mechanical Ant (The Giant Mechanical Ant), Friday, 23 June 2006 18:28 (nineteen years ago)

Thanks for the new screen name!

― I will commence to drop a knowledge bomb. (Rock Hardy), Friday, 23 June 2006 18:49 (nineteen years ago)

Evidence that some graduate programs will admit anyone with a pulse?

― patita (patita), Friday, 23 June 2006 19:04 (nineteen years ago)

shit, i couldn't read that blog, i was getting cramps from all the cringing

― elmo argonaut (allocryptic), Friday, 23 June 2006 19:08 (nineteen years ago)

St. John's does tend to admit anyone with a pulse graduate or otherwise, but brainless undergrads generally don't get a degree. The Graduate Institute folks, however . . .

― Colin Meeder (Mert), Friday, 23 June 2006 19:13 (nineteen years ago)

Aha. St. John's College. This explains everything.

― elmo argonaut (allocryptic), Friday, 23 June 2006 19:14 (nineteen years ago)

" " really is a great Radiohead song. I approve of that mix.

― Jesus Dan (Dan Perry), Friday, 23 June 2006 19:16 (nineteen years ago)

xpost
Notable people associated with St. John's College:

1. Francis Scott Key, alumnus; lyricist of the United States national anthem, The Star-Spangled Banner.

2. Jac Holzman founded Elektra Records in 1950 while a student at St. John's.

3. Lee David Zlotoff, creator of MacGyver.

― CDDB (Dan Deluca), Friday, 23 June 2006 19:17 (nineteen years ago)

More hilarity on his myspace page: http://www.myspace.com/bmichaelpayne

― Fsck Washing Ong's Hat (Chris Barrus), Friday, 23 June 2006 19:19 (nineteen years ago)

http://pic19.picturetrail.com/VOL1060/4392705/9287039/130404026.jpg

"SUB-WAYNE AT BEST"

― Werner Herzog Netflix Quine (ex machina), Friday, 23 June 2006 19:20 (nineteen years ago)

3. Lee David Zlotoff, creator of MacGyver.

― Werner Herzog Netflix Quine (ex machina), Friday, 23 June 2006 19:21 (nineteen years ago)

ilm: destroying fragile egos 1 at a time.

― deej.. (deej..), Friday, 23 June 2006 19:22 (nineteen years ago)

er, ilx. Look at what you've done, B. Mikes!

― deej.. (deej..), Friday, 23 June 2006 19:22 (nineteen years ago)

omg

Religion: Scientologist

― deej.. (deej..), Friday, 23 June 2006 19:25 (nineteen years ago)

http://www.flickr.com/photos/85831954@N00/167413921/

http://www.flickr.com/photos/85831954@N00/167413921/

― Werner Herzog Netflix Quine (ex machina), Friday, 23 June 2006 19:26 (nineteen years ago)

err A Garden State/Lost In Translation style self-portrait.

― Werner Herzog Netflix Quine (ex machina), Friday, 23 June 2006 19:26 (nineteen years ago)

http://static.flickr.com/73/167413920_1a9e8d29a2.jpg?v=0

― Werner Herzog Netflix Quine (ex machina), Friday, 23 June 2006 19:26 (nineteen years ago)

er, don't cha think the scientologist thing is a joke..

― CDDB (Dan Deluca), Friday, 23 June 2006 19:27 (nineteen years ago)

cf The talk page for wikipedia's existentialism entry is an entry in iteslf

― Werner Herzog Netflix Quine (ex machina), Friday, 23 June 2006 19:27 (nineteen years ago)

Minor change...I took out Garden State as an existentialist film (by that logic, any film about a detatched teen angst male character could be an "existentialist film") and that stupid bit about a band called Straylight Run naming an album "Existentialism on Prom Night...," because who cares? —The preceding unsigned comment was added by 24.170.194.107 (talk • contribs) .
Shouldnt Donnie Darko be considered an existential film?

I care. —The preceding unsigned comment was added by B. Mikes (talk • contribs) .

― Werner Herzog Netflix Quine (ex machina), Friday, 23 June 2006 19:28 (nineteen years ago)

From: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Lee_David_Zlotoff

Zlotoff also attended St. Johns College. His TV series MacGyver was based on the philosophy of a St. John's student.

Also from St. Johns... James M. Cain and Ahmet Ertegun

― Fsck Washing Ong's Hat (Chris Barrus), Friday, 23 June 2006 19:29 (nineteen years ago)

"Tofue"

― Werner Herzog Netflix Quine (ex machina), Friday, 23 June 2006 19:29 (nineteen years ago)

er, don't cha think the scientologist thing is a joke..

Oh, maybe. He seemed v. sincere though.

― deej.. (deej..), Friday, 23 June 2006 19:39 (nineteen years ago)

More hilarity on his myspace page

Hmmmm...

I am the Shaquille O'Neal of philosophy.

I'm reading for an M.A. at Saint John's College, Santa Fe; and I write different things at my weblog, then no sound. Ch-ch-check it out.

Excuse me, I just died inside. Again!

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Friday, 23 June 2006 19:53 (nineteen years ago)

Other St. John's graduates: me and Daddino.

― Colin Meeder (Mert), Friday, 23 June 2006 19:59 (nineteen years ago)

Oh I know. But you are not calling yourself the Shaquille O'Neal of emo.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Friday, 23 June 2006 20:02 (nineteen years ago)

The Edison, maybe . . .

― Colin Meeder (Mert), Friday, 23 June 2006 20:04 (nineteen years ago)

Eureka!

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Friday, 23 June 2006 20:04 (nineteen years ago)

WTF does "the Shaquille O'Neal of philosphy" mean? He forces his thoughts on others and can't follow simple logic that others routinely parse without problem?

― Jesus Dan (Dan Perry), Friday, 23 June 2006 20:08 (nineteen years ago)

Maybe he just has really big hands.

― Jena (JenaP), Friday, 23 June 2006 20:10 (nineteen years ago)

His Amazon wish list seems pretty by-the-numbers

― Fsck Washing Ong's Hat (Chris Barrus), Friday, 23 June 2006 20:14 (nineteen years ago)

PICTURED LEFT!! HE'S LISTENING!!

― A Giant Mechanical Ant (The Giant Mechanical Ant), Friday, 23 June 2006 20:32 (nineteen years ago)

haha he buys his skillets pre-seasoned

― aimee semple mcmansion (Jody Beth Rosen), Friday, 23 June 2006 20:34 (nineteen years ago)

This thread is very unbecoming of ILX. Schoolyard victims turn schoolyard bullies.

― Super Cub (Debito), Friday, 23 June 2006 21:17 (nineteen years ago)

Had we just found him and pummelled him, yes. But it begins with the guy coming on and pretending he's not the dude writing the article in question = he's fair game from the start AFAIC.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Friday, 23 June 2006 21:22 (nineteen years ago)

In sum:

"I want attention!"

"Okay, you're a dipshit."

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Friday, 23 June 2006 21:22 (nineteen years ago)

ok. play on.

(I am surely not the voice of morality)

― Super Cub (Debito), Friday, 23 June 2006 21:23 (nineteen years ago)

haha he buys his skillets pre-seasoned

that sounds like some kind of old-fashioned insult, like "he's the kind of guy who buys his skillets pre-seasoned, if you know what i mean"

― s1ocki (slutsky), Friday, 23 June 2006 21:28 (nineteen years ago)

"I hear that one doesn't salt his saddles properly, old bean."

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Friday, 23 June 2006 21:31 (nineteen years ago)

"...and he ABUSED HIS CRACKERS, m'lord. Disgusting."

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Friday, 23 June 2006 21:32 (nineteen years ago)

i see nothing wrong with this thread. carry on.

― cutty (mcutt), Friday, 23 June 2006 21:37 (nineteen years ago)

also:

i wish tynan was here.

― cutty (mcutt), Friday, 23 June 2006 21:37 (nineteen years ago)

This thread is very unbecoming of ILX. Schoolyard victims turn schoolyard bullies.

OK then, I'll give him some useful advice. The Griffin iMic he has wish-listed has an annoying low frequency hum that makes it unsuitable for good quality USB-Audio conversion. The Griffin Soundwave box is superior.

― Fsck Washing Ong's Hat (Chris Barrus), Friday, 23 June 2006 21:37 (nineteen years ago)

Cutty help me out here:

the slut = B Mikes
the "innocent" = Wrinklepaws
the cynic = Tynan Delong
the sophisticated center = ________

― Werner Herzog Netflix Quine (ex machina), Friday, 23 June 2006 21:42 (nineteen years ago)

[Repeat also for music writers with girls names?]

― Werner Herzog Netflix Quine (ex machina), Friday, 23 June 2006 21:42 (nineteen years ago)

the sophisticated center = the noize board?

― cutty (mcutt), Friday, 23 June 2006 21:43 (nineteen years ago)

this thread really cheered me up after slogging through the MSTRKRFT thread at ILM

― aaron d.g. (aaron d.g.), Friday, 23 June 2006 21:45 (nineteen years ago)

"he's the kind of guy who buys his skillets pre-seasoned, if you know what i mean"

ROFLZ!!

― Shakey Mo Collier (Shakey Mo Collier), Friday, 23 June 2006 21:46 (nineteen years ago)

NED RAGGETT = SOPHISTICATED CENTER???

― Werner Herzog Netflix Quine (ex machina), Friday, 23 June 2006 21:47 (nineteen years ago)

Meantime, more of the man's joy:

By cutting up the Beatles' tracks to make beats for Jay-Z, Miz-to-the-Izzo puts to lie to Wordsworth's much-quoted saw, "We murder to dissect." If by murder you mean Django Mousehardt absolutely kills every track on the Grey Album (in the colloquially [borderline slangy] parlance of rap music, to kill a track is a good thing), then you're absolutely correct. He's a lot like Rivers Cuomo of Weezer who has since the mid-nineties kept a three-ring binder full of rock song analyses that he calls the Encyclopedia of Pop. By dissecting the tropes and figures of music, both artists (auteurs?) make sophisticated, lowest-common denominator pop music.

It appears to me that Joyce does a similar thing with Ulysses. He worked with what he was given: Newspapers, memories, accounts, reports, maps, stories and books. Anyone (well, not really--but for the sake of argument, let us say) could have arranged the exact same data in the exact same way; for the most part, much of the information of Ulysses was at least available. But no one arranges data like Joyce arranges data; and that's his particular genius. DM seems roughly analagous to Joyce in the sense that mostly all DJs and remixers are similar to Joyce in that they all engage in a similar project: To rearrange found content in an interesting and aesthetically pleasing manner.

Speaking of interesting and aesthetically pleasing things, that Chuck Klosterman has to be my favorite new sports writer (!) in all of the Internet.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Friday, 23 June 2006 21:47 (nineteen years ago)

As I think a prophet once said:

"CUT IT CUT IT CUT IT CUT IT"

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Friday, 23 June 2006 21:48 (nineteen years ago)

NED RAGGETT = SOPHISTICATED CENTER???

Darling sweetie.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Friday, 23 June 2006 21:48 (nineteen years ago)

http://img71.imageshack.us/img71/993/tynan6in0yd.gif

― jinx hijinks (sanskrit), Friday, 23 June 2006 22:09 (nineteen years ago)

ihttp://www.sccs.swarthmore.edu/org/earthworms/SpringBreak2003/PileOn.jpg

― yuengling participle (rotten03), Friday, 23 June 2006 23:20 (nineteen years ago)

This is all I can offer: you don't really need to spell out S-A-I-N-T when you write "St. John's College."

― Michael Daddino (epicharmus), Friday, 23 June 2006 23:59 (nineteen years ago)

Oh and treating Joyce like his main project was re-arranging "found content" is just mammothly depressing.

― Michael Daddino (epicharmus), Saturday, 24 June 2006 00:02 (nineteen years ago)

I heard he wets the bed.

― polyphonic (polyphonic), Saturday, 24 June 2006 00:07 (nineteen years ago)

anyone remember brett at staticmultimedia

― cutty (mcutt), Saturday, 24 June 2006 00:13 (nineteen years ago)

He took down the "I love everything" post.

For what it's worth, B Mikes, I like the track called "Pasta"!

― I will commence to drop a knowledge bomb. (Rock Hardy), Saturday, 24 June 2006 00:15 (nineteen years ago)

This thread thread is fun. You guys are like sharks in the water and pained be michael is blood. It reminds me a little of the time skot wrote a not very positive review of a Def Jux album (was it R2D2) that got a whole "Jukie" (or something like that they called themselves) message board posting pictures of him and pictures of me as they googled us and scorned us. At one point, somebody e-mailed me (!) and said that if I ever set foot in Brooklyn, my face would be slammed in the pavement. Good times, good times. We had quite some chuckles.

I hear he takes himself waaaay too seriously. Sorry, dude, but you were begging to get made fun of.

― Maria :D (Maria D.), Saturday, 24 June 2006 00:25 (nineteen years ago)

TS: http://www.thedrakehotel.ca/Assets/davy_rothbart.jpg

http://joyce.msk.ru/ulysses/joyce-ulysses-1922.jpg

― Suzy Creemcheese (SuzyCreemcheese), Saturday, 24 June 2006 00:27 (nineteen years ago)

TS:

http://www.thedrakehotel.ca/Assets/davy_rothbart.jpg

http://joyce.msk.ru/ulysses/joyce-ulysses-1922.jpg

― Suzy Creemcheese (SuzyCreemcheese), Saturday, 24 June 2006 00:27 (nineteen years ago)

xpost

Oh, and that guy who threatened bodily injury later apologized (said he was drunk) and seemed like actually kind of a nice guy later (although we kept it strictly e-mail).

Oh, and I'd take Found over Ulysses. I just can't read the guys work. Call me dumb.

― Maria :D (Maria D.), Saturday, 24 June 2006 00:30 (nineteen years ago)

guy's, that is.

― Maria :D (Maria D.), Saturday, 24 June 2006 00:31 (nineteen years ago)

He took down the "I love everything" post.

Still there for me, or was it different before?

― Marmot 4-Tay: forth-coming, my child. forth-coming most righteous champion (mar, Saturday, 24 June 2006 00:31 (nineteen years ago)

in a post about how joyce misspelled his middle name he, unintentionally, gets Joyce's middle name(s) wrong.

i'm normally repulsed by these pile-on threads but this blog is really one of the worst things i've ever seen on the internet. it's quite fascinating.

― jed_ (jed), Saturday, 24 June 2006 00:35 (nineteen years ago)

xpost

He had a post after the SFJ one called "I love everything" which started by quoting Ned:

DUDE HOW MUCH OF A PIG-IGNORANT SELF-SHILLER DIPSHIT ARE YOU?!?

followed by "I guess that pretty much sums it up", a link to this thread, and a "that's what I get for posting before I've had my coffee." (I'm paraphrasing.)

― I will commence to drop a knowledge bomb. (Rock Hardy), Saturday, 24 June 2006 00:40 (nineteen years ago)

i think it was more like "i didn't do too badly, though, considering i hadn't had my coffee".

― jed_ (jed), Saturday, 24 June 2006 00:43 (nineteen years ago)

I love everything

DUDE HOW MUCH OF A PIG-IGNORANT SELF-SHILLER DIPSHIT ARE YOU?!?
-- Ned Raggett, June 23rd, 2006

Pretty much sums up the whole shebang. Remarkably, I did not read the previous three days correpsondance between SFJ and Gerald Marzorati that preceded the Slate piece that I quoted earlier. But I think still that I did well for firing off a quick morning post before I had any coffee.

"I walk on rough ground" refers to a line in Wittgenstein's Philosophic Investigations regarding language not working on ice, but only when it get's traction. I got a lot of traction today--thanks for the feedback!

posted by B. Michael Payne @ 11:21 AM

― Marmot 4-Tay: forth-coming, my child. forth-coming most righteous champion (mar, Saturday, 24 June 2006 00:46 (nineteen years ago)

It even links to this thread!

― Marmot 4-Tay: forth-coming, my child. forth-coming most righteous champion (mar, Saturday, 24 June 2006 00:47 (nineteen years ago)

"get's"

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Saturday, 24 June 2006 01:06 (nineteen years ago)

I think we've all learned something today.

1. Never try to pull shit on a librarian.

2. The internets is a food chain.

L to R: ILX, B Mikes

― I will commence to drop a knowledge bomb. (Rock Hardy), Saturday, 24 June 2006 01:14 (nineteen years ago)

He seems to be beyond either self-awareness or satire. Which makes me fear for his classmates and acquaintances.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Saturday, 24 June 2006 01:17 (nineteen years ago)

http://www.unusualcards.com/images/memories%20WEB/Help-me-billXS.jpg

― Werner Herzog Netflix Quine (ex machina), Saturday, 24 June 2006 01:23 (nineteen years ago)

Tynan is like Gore Vidal compared to this guy.

― Marmot 4-Tay: forth-coming, my child. forth-coming most righteous champion (mar, Saturday, 24 June 2006 01:24 (nineteen years ago)

Preface to the reader

Ought'nt I have the whole horizon of this project afront me before I write its preface? You, reader, could not know because I, writer, do not know. As such, the act of writing is a nocturnal emission, a blank. I cannot purport to know about that which I may blog in the future, nor could I anticipate a reader's miscomprehension, confusion or perplexity. As such, this preface-manoeuvre (and it really is a "manoeuvre," a work of the hands--for I am typing in this technocratic age) is sure to fail. The hermeneutic circle is breached more surely than a threepenny condom on its fourth or fifth use.

this is why i'm leaving academia. or, sorry, the academe.
this is also a clear rip-off of the Spivak's intro for "Of Grammatology." Except that last line. That's all B.

http://philosophypage.blogspot.com/2006/03/preface-to-reader.html

― A Giant Mechanical Ant (The Giant Mechanical Ant), Saturday, 24 June 2006 04:04 (nineteen years ago)

All we are is dust in the wind, dude.

― Marmot 4-Tay: forth-coming, my child. forth-coming most righteous champion (mar, Saturday, 24 June 2006 04:25 (nineteen years ago)

I'm nodding sagely right now.

― A Giant Mechanical Ant (The Giant Mechanical Ant), Saturday, 24 June 2006 04:36 (nineteen years ago)

You joke--but as the Moldy Peaches said in their immortal ditty, "Who's Got the Crack?": There's no such thing as a harmless joke.

― Marmot 4-Tay: forth-coming, my child. forth-coming most righteous champion (mar, Saturday, 24 June 2006 04:40 (nineteen years ago)

I haven't seen it, but I'm sure he'd like the same kind of promotion I received. You should look at his weblog: http://furryblogmonster.blogspot.com/ . I still love everything.

― B Mikes (B Mingus), Saturday, 24 June 2006 04:52 (nineteen years ago)

Heyyyy!! : )

― A Giant Mechanical Ant (The Giant Mechanical Ant), Saturday, 24 June 2006 04:55 (nineteen years ago)

is he also on crack?

― A Giant Mechanical Ant (The Giant Mechanical Ant), Saturday, 24 June 2006 04:56 (nineteen years ago)

http://blogs.setonhill.edu/LeslieRodriguez/Duck_Hunt_NES_ScreenShot3.jpg

― A Giant Mechanical Ant (The Giant Mechanical Ant), Saturday, 24 June 2006 05:03 (nineteen years ago)

Should be easier--fish in a barrel.

― B Mikes (B Mingus), Saturday, 24 June 2006 05:11 (nineteen years ago)

So Mikes how was your day? You seem in reasonably high spirits, for which I'm genuinly thankful.
As well, what were you thinking? I'm actually curious.

― A Giant Mechanical Ant (The Giant Mechanical Ant), Saturday, 24 June 2006 05:17 (nineteen years ago)

I have a friend (who is technically a JUNIOR due to his first/last name being that of his father) who has some legal shit that goes by his first initial, middle name, last name. Is this like that or are we on some F. Scott Fitzgerald dandified shit here? I've always wanted to go by just "m" but that'd be some Fritz Lang silence in the film, madness in the halls thing.

― mike h. (mike h.), Saturday, 24 June 2006 05:20 (nineteen years ago)

p.s. my name is mike too, maybe you just want to join our club only with some business up from and some payne in the back.

― mike h. (mike h.), Saturday, 24 June 2006 05:21 (nineteen years ago)

you know you could have just said "I founded this website".....It still wouldn't have been pretty though.

― A Giant Mechanical Ant (The Giant Mechanical Ant), Saturday, 24 June 2006 05:27 (nineteen years ago)

1 Comments:

Anonymous said...

nobody will ever lick your asshole.
1:14 PM

― so poignant! (haitch), Saturday, 24 June 2006 05:36 (nineteen years ago)

Shameless shilling. I'm glad everyone was perspicuous enough to see through my ruse of finding, etc, my own website. I really like the feedback.

― B Mikes (B Mingus), Saturday, 24 June 2006 05:43 (nineteen years ago)

I was totally trying to give helpful advice before the pile-on.

Also, speaking for myself: I totally would not have been very critical of this guy had he been, say, 16. Or even 18. But there's something about being 24 and trying very hard to make certain references and failing completely -- plus also being so desperate to have something interesting to say that you just flat out make up an idea that somehow, despite being fictional, is deeply uninteresting ... it's just bad.

I've always been really against the word "pretentious," because it tends to get used in this anti-intellectual way -- to refer to anything that's just outside the speaker's comfort zone. This dude has made me understand the use of the word; there's like huge embarrassing striving pretense in all his writing, and you know it's pretense because it's just totally wrong, about everything, and pointless too. It's like how there's nothing more aggravating than a pedant who's actually wrong.

Speaking of which, surely the proper grammar would be "Oughtn't I to have the whole horizon" etc.? (Which is symptomatic -- like, why say "oughtn't" if you don't know how to use it right? I mean, there's something to be said for trying and failing -- I can kind of appreciate that he's trying really hard to make himself be or seem like a certain type of person who knows about certain types of things, and maybe through trial and error he'll get there, and all. But there's also something to be said for the kind of sensible humble attitude where you know where you stand and do your best at your own level. Dude's like a 13-year-old who isn't even very good at basketball trying to play in the NBA. Finish high school, kid. Stop trying to dribble between your legs and just work on moving down the court. Quit trying to dunk, you're only 5'4". Work on your layups while you grow.)

― nabisco (nabisco), Saturday, 24 June 2006 05:44 (nineteen years ago)

xpost

SEE that's your problem, dude: "perspicuous" means clearly expressed and easy to understand. You're crossing its meaning in your head with "perspicacity," which means perceptive and discerning.

― nabisco (nabisco), Saturday, 24 June 2006 05:46 (nineteen years ago)

Oh well i tried

(perspicuous?)

― A Giant Mechanical Ant (The Giant Mechanical Ant), Saturday, 24 June 2006 05:47 (nineteen years ago)

We love you B Mikes. Please stay on as a regular poster. There is this man Tuomas we'd like you to meet.

― Marmot 4-Tay: forth-coming, my child. forth-coming most righteous champion (mar, Saturday, 24 June 2006 05:48 (nineteen years ago)

Pardon me, "perspicacity" would be the quality of being perceptive and discerning, as it is a noun, not a verb.

(P.S. that's a natural mistake and it would TOTALLY not be a big deal if you didn't do something similar with like every tenth word and/or concept you deploy. We will still love you if use your normal diction. Our love is unconditional. I mean, fine, buy a word-a-day calendar or something, and work new ones into the rotation, and eventually your diction will match your self-image, or whatever, but in the meantime just chill where you are.)

― nabisco (nabisco), Saturday, 24 June 2006 05:52 (nineteen years ago)

Pardon me, I meant adjective, not verb.

See, we all make mistakes.

― nabisco (nabisco), Saturday, 24 June 2006 05:52 (nineteen years ago)

Goodnight, Mikes. You shitbag.

― A Giant Mechanical Ant (The Giant Mechanical Ant), Saturday, 24 June 2006 05:57 (nineteen years ago)

This thread is so beautiful.

― Marmot 4-Tay: forth-coming, my child. forth-coming most righteous champion (mar, Saturday, 24 June 2006 05:57 (nineteen years ago)

Like nabsico, I think what Mr. Payne posted would have been amusing if done by an adolescent, but you're a fucking GI, dude! What the fuck! You are being given the opportunity to bask ever so slightly in the glow of the greatest undergraduate institution in the world well after the fact -- PAY SOME FUCKING ATTENTION!!!

― Colin Meeder (Mert), Saturday, 24 June 2006 09:21 (nineteen years ago)

I think "oughtn't I have" is correct, though. Still, he should have used "shouldn't" instead of "oughtn't" and avoided the issue altogether, unless he enjoys pulling the wings off of syntactical flies.

― I will commence to drop a knowledge bomb. (Rock Hardy), Saturday, 24 June 2006 12:45 (nineteen years ago)

Really? Cuz you'd say "I ought to have" -- "ought" is the main verb, and you'd use "to have" in the infinitive.

But point being, you know, the fact that I'm not entirely confident about that is one reason I wouldn't make ostentatious use of "oughtn't."

― nabisco (nabisco), Saturday, 24 June 2006 13:56 (nineteen years ago)

I'm glad everyone was perspicuous enough to see through my ruse of finding, etc, my own website.

Yeah that ten seconds of in-depth research almost immediately after you posted was the most thorough work I've ever had to do.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Saturday, 24 June 2006 13:56 (nineteen years ago)

But point being, you know, the fact that I'm not entirely confident about that is one reason I wouldn't make ostentatious use of "oughtn't."

Exactly, same here. I'm not sure I'm right either, which means I would never construct such a sentence.

― I will commence to drop a knowledge bomb. (Rock Hardy), Saturday, 24 June 2006 14:02 (nineteen years ago)

Wait, yeah, you need the "to." I ought is the subject/verb part; the rest is the object of "ought," so you'd use the infinitive. (It's a thing we're referencing as object, not a verb action.)

- to stop using big words.
- to rethink my blog-promotion tactics.
- to get new sunglasses.

Same as you would if the subject and verb were "I want": I want candy (a thing) and then I want to play (another thing). So: "Ought not I ..." -- ought not you what? TO have the horizon etc.

― nabisco (nabisco), Saturday, 24 June 2006 14:26 (nineteen years ago)

You're a bunch of meanies.

― Nathalie (stevie nixed), Saturday, 24 June 2006 14:34 (nineteen years ago)

Nathalie, I tried to open up the dialogue -- I was nice -- and he writes back saying that he fooled us, that his plan for promotion was working just right, etc (apparently notoriety among a small group of people who will only ever read his blog for rubbernecking purposes = promotion). I was feeling bad, and really bring about a detente, and that's what he comes back with. As far as I'm concerned we're attacking a construction at this point, not the real Mikes, who might be a nice dude, if you took away the ego, aviators, and theorybabble.

― A Giant Mechanical Ant (The Giant Mechanical Ant), Saturday, 24 June 2006 14:47 (nineteen years ago)

lots of folks here have also given him sound advice, and would have been doing him a service if his self-image was not completely impervious to criticism.

― A Giant Mechanical Ant (The Giant Mechanical Ant), Saturday, 24 June 2006 15:02 (nineteen years ago)

but yes, we are meanies.

― A Giant Mechanical Ant (The Giant Mechanical Ant), Saturday, 24 June 2006 15:24 (nineteen years ago)

Is this even English?

― Tantrum The Cat (Tantrum The Cat), Saturday, 24 June 2006 16:02 (nineteen years ago)

he writes back saying that he fooled us, that his plan for promotion was working just right, etc

haha, down here we call that "backin' and fillin'".

― I will commence to drop a knowledge bomb. (Rock Hardy), Saturday, 24 June 2006 16:12 (nineteen years ago)

Well it's all very good. We had a nice party at our house last night, and I learned the difference between perspicuous and perspicacious. I've probably confused the two of those words for a long time!

― B Mikes (B Mingus), Saturday, 24 June 2006 18:54 (nineteen years ago)

But go listen to Top 40 radio. I'll be the first to admit that Lil' John's "Snap Yo Fingers" is pretty catchy, but...

What? Finish the sentence. Lil Jon rules! :D

― Marmot 4-Tay: forth-coming, my child. forth-coming most righteous champion (mar, Saturday, 24 June 2006 21:36 (nineteen years ago)

all my playas in tha house that can buy the bar
and them ballin ass niggas wit the candy cars
if you a pimp and you know you don't luv dem hos
when you get on the flo' nigga throw dem bows
all my women in tha house if you chasin cash
and you got some big titties wit a matchin ass
wit your fly ass boots or ya open toes
when you get on tha flo' nigga throw dem bows

― Forksclovetofu (Forksclovetofu), Saturday, 24 June 2006 21:41 (nineteen years ago)

Hmmm...

― Marmot 4-Tay: forth-coming, my child. forth-coming most righteous champion (mar, Friday, 30 June 2006 22:59 (nineteen years ago)

His post on the Summarize a Novel in 25 Words was funny. Man, it was great to revisit that thread, from the dawn of I Love Books. Remember how much press that thread got?

― Maria :D (Maria D.), Saturday, 1 July 2006 00:47 (nineteen years ago)

funny = Babybuddha, er, cutting him off at the knees on the "Recognitions" thread.

― A Giant Mechanical Ant (The Giant Mechanical Ant), Saturday, 1 July 2006 03:01 (nineteen years ago)

shit. just read some other posts. what a piece of work.

― A Giant Mechanical Ant (The Giant Mechanical Ant), Saturday, 1 July 2006 03:19 (nineteen years ago)

two weeks pass...

I can't believe people are still reading this thread.

― B Money (B Mingus), Tuesday, 18 July 2006 17:20 (nineteen years ago)

they aren't.

― s1ocki (slutsky), Tuesday, 18 July 2006 17:29 (nineteen years ago)

http://www.halcyon.org/retard.gif

― Marmot 4-Tay: what those guyz make music 4. (marmotwolof), Tuesday, 18 July 2006 17:43 (nineteen years ago)

haha did this dude stick around then? can we actually chase ANYONE away?

― david allen grier (dubplatestyle), Tuesday, 18 July 2006 17:58 (nineteen years ago)

it's like all the gimps and feebs we collect on our shoes just end up sticking around until suddenly the newest crop of gimps and feebs is in and suddenly they look like super-geniuses and we're all "nabsico otm"

― david allen grier (dubplatestyle), Tuesday, 18 July 2006 17:59 (nineteen years ago)

z-snap otm

― David R. (popshots75`), Tuesday, 18 July 2006 18:06 (nineteen years ago)

Meaningfulness.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Tuesday, 18 July 2006 18:12 (nineteen years ago)

They're esepcially not reading it due to Muse's newest prooving Radiohead to be navel-noodling wusses..

― Grey, Ian (IanBrooklyn), Tuesday, 18 July 2006 19:43 (nineteen years ago)

TS: navel-noodling wusses vs. grandiose poodle-rockers

― David R. (popshots75`), Tuesday, 18 July 2006 19:59 (nineteen years ago)

this thread revival is mind boggling.

― jed_ (jed), Tuesday, 18 July 2006 20:38 (nineteen years ago)

one year passes...

where u b, b money????

― gershy, Monday, 13 August 2007 16:04 (eighteen years ago)

bullying etc.

― Frogman Henry, Monday, 13 August 2007 16:11 (eighteen years ago)

In this record review of Hail to the Thief, which was published on Chuck Klosterman's and my birthday

― deej, Monday, 13 August 2007 16:20 (eighteen years ago)

I found this website
http://thennosound.blogspot.com/

― gershy, Monday, 13 August 2007 17:32 (eighteen years ago)

I wonder if I was drinking when I posted to this thread originally

― mh, Tuesday, 14 August 2007 18:52 (eighteen years ago)

this dude reminds me of B Mikes:
http://boards.1up.com/zd/board/message?board.id=egmofftop&message.id=1269177

― marmotwolof, Tuesday, 14 August 2007 20:03 (eighteen years ago)

two years pass...

Revive!!

Holy shit, this thread is GOLD!!

― Mr. Snrub, Tuesday, 20 October 2009 14:25 (sixteen years ago)

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v296/WilliamCrump63/FFBOARD7.jpg

― BIG HOOS aka the steendriver, Tuesday, 20 October 2009 15:31 (sixteen years ago)

The memories.

― Ned Raggett, Tuesday, 20 October 2009 15:42 (sixteen years ago)

so many awes slams from some of the nicest ilxors in here!

― call all destroyer, Tuesday, 20 October 2009 15:46 (sixteen years ago)

<3 b mikes

― rent, Tuesday, 20 October 2009 15:54 (sixteen years ago)

http://bmichael.me/

― velko, Wednesday, 21 October 2009 07:20 (sixteen years ago)

god this kinda straight up cruelty is hard to read.

but this:

WTF does "the Shaquille O'Neal of philosphy" mean? He forces his thoughts on others and can't follow simple logic that others routinely parse without problem?

― Jesus Dan (Dan Perry), Friday, June 23, 2006 8:08 PM (3 years ago)

made me lol

― iatee, Wednesday, 21 October 2009 08:12 (sixteen years ago)

http://twitter.com/bmichael

― Elvis Telecom, Wednesday, 21 October 2009 08:14 (sixteen years ago)

nine months pass...

@sfj How is the show? 9:05 PM Jul 28th via Tweetie for Mac in reply to sfj

― buzza, Friday, 6 August 2010 05:05 (fifteen years ago)

IT NEVER ENDS.

― Ned Raggett, Friday, 6 August 2010 05:12 (fifteen years ago)

blog is gone, squatted on by someone else who left on cryptic post, and the single insulting comment is from a chap named b. m1chael payne

― ('_') (omar little), Friday, 6 August 2010 05:14 (fifteen years ago)

http://technotip.org/wp-content/uploads/blogging/html/redirect.gif

― buzza, Friday, 6 August 2010 05:20 (fifteen years ago)

omg his fucking twitter

― Matt Armstrong, Friday, 6 August 2010 05:33 (fifteen years ago)

yeah, hard to believe

― buzza, Friday, 6 August 2010 05:34 (fifteen years ago)

Wow. Ned, I hardly knew ye!

― VegemiteGrrrl, Friday, 6 August 2010 06:20 (fifteen years ago)

p.s. i am also a war widow and i make candles.

― 8o---e*.\\\||///.*ə---o8 (forksclovetofu), Friday, 6 August 2010 06:24 (fifteen years ago)

Bio: B. Michael is an all-purpose intellectual.

― Janet Privacy Control (corey), Friday, 6 August 2010 06:29 (fifteen years ago)

Man, the fact that this guy is pushing 30 makes me feel better about not having accomplished much at the age of 23.

― Janet Privacy Control (corey), Friday, 6 August 2010 06:30 (fifteen years ago)

sfj has it all-- website, tumbler, etc blah blah blah

― curmudgeon, Friday, 6 August 2010 16:04 (fifteen years ago)

Wow. Ned, I hardly knew ye!

It had to be done.

― Ned Raggett, Friday, 6 August 2010 16:05 (fifteen years ago)

b. mikes is still around? Well, there goes my productivity for the day.

― turtles all the way down (mh), Friday, 6 August 2010 16:07 (fifteen years ago)

lol this jpg

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v296/WilliamCrump63/FFBOARD7.jpg

― goole, Friday, 6 August 2010 16:36 (fifteen years ago)

what's going on itt?

― markers, Friday, 6 August 2010 17:50 (fifteen years ago)

something terrifying and wonderful

― Mordy, Friday, 6 August 2010 17:52 (fifteen years ago)

yeah, probably should've actually read the thread from the beginning instead of just from the revive. just started reading the whole thing and it's total gold

― markers, Friday, 6 August 2010 17:55 (fifteen years ago)

haha he buys his skillets pre-seasoned
― aimee semple mcmansion (Jody Beth Rosen), Friday, June 23, 2006 4:34 PM (4 years ago) Bookmark Suggest Ban Permalink

― mizzell, Friday, 6 August 2010 18:10 (fifteen years ago)

The latest Robyn album is my spirit animal.
3:00 PM Jun 19th via Echofon

― Matt Armstrong, Friday, 6 August 2010 18:56 (fifteen years ago)

RIP world

― markers, Friday, 6 August 2010 19:07 (fifteen years ago)

two years pass...

b mikes

― buzza, Sunday, 4 November 2012 02:29 (thirteen years ago)

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