Dear america: deep fried green beans and ranch are not a "healthy" snack.

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"four courses for 12.99? Sure!"

― acid waffle house (dubplatestyle), Saturday, 20 January 2007 01:12 (nineteen years ago)

Never eat at a restaurant with flair.

― Tep (ktepi), Saturday, 20 January 2007 01:17 (nineteen years ago)

applebee's, chili's, tgif, all destroyable.

― ‘•’u (gear), Saturday, 20 January 2007 01:20 (nineteen years ago)

destroyable but indestructible

― feed latebloomer (latebloomer), Saturday, 20 January 2007 01:26 (nineteen years ago)

they're building a ruby tuesday in my yard

― feed latebloomer (latebloomer), Saturday, 20 January 2007 01:27 (nineteen years ago)

when my hillbilly cousins were in town, they were raving about their favorite healthy snack - deep-fried veggie sticks. Apparently a real delicacy in south Alabama - it's a bunch of chopped-up carrots, celery, etc. formed into a stick, battered and deep-fried.

― milo z (mlp), Saturday, 20 January 2007 01:30 (nineteen years ago)

APPLEBEES HOME OF THE LIZARD HEAD SALAD!!

CORALVILLE, Iowa -- A lizard head found in a carry-out salad from a restaurant in this eastern Iowa city has tested negative for salmonella, a bacteria that causes food poisoning.

The lizard head was found May 2 in a Santa Fe Chicken Salad prepared at Applebee's Neighborhood Grill & Bar.

Kot Flora, an assistant director at the Johnson County Public Health Department, said Friday that preliminary results showed no presence of salmonella. Final results are expected Monday.

A complaint was filed with the health department by John Hellstein after his wife discovered the lizard head in a salad she ordered for lunch.

"Obviously, she was upset," said Hellstein, a University of Iowa professor of dentistry. "I don't expect she will be eating Santa Fe salads anytime soon."

Apple Corp. LP, the owner of the Applebee's restaurant, issued a statement Friday. In it, the corporation apologized and said it had confirmed it was an isolated incident. The restaurant is now using pre-cut, pre-cleaned lettuce for its salads, the statement said.

Flora said Applebee's is considered a good operator by the health department.

"We think this was just an unfortunate fluke," Flora said.

Hellstein agrees.

"I worked in produce for seven years, and I've seen lots of things crawl out of lots of things."

― chaki (chaki), Saturday, 20 January 2007 01:43 (nineteen years ago)

http://www.chicagoist.com/attachments/Rachelle%20Bowden/fan_si_pan_fried_stringbeans_thumb.jpg

my #1 health food

― A B C (sparklecock), Saturday, 20 January 2007 01:48 (nineteen years ago)

I thought that was a photo of the lizard head at first.

― Tep (ktepi), Saturday, 20 January 2007 01:53 (nineteen years ago)

Why would you eat deep-fried green beans when deep-fried strawberries are so much better?

― max (maxreax), Saturday, 20 January 2007 01:58 (nineteen years ago)

http://www.elbandito.co.uk/downloads/bloc-party.jpg

You tell 'em!

― Tiki Theater Xymposium (Bent Over at the Arclight), Saturday, 20 January 2007 02:02 (nineteen years ago)

http://www.biosci.ohio-state.edu/~wenzel/cicada8.jpg

― ‘•’u (gear), Saturday, 20 January 2007 02:05 (nineteen years ago)

http://i21.photobucket.com/albums/b288/lasttycoon/anemone.jpg
Deep-fried sea anemone from a Japanese-Spanish fusion joint in Madrid.

― Tep (ktepi), Saturday, 20 January 2007 02:19 (nineteen years ago)

i forgot: the pic i posted is tempura-style cicada

― ‘•’u (gear), Saturday, 20 January 2007 02:31 (nineteen years ago)

strongo in your heart you know that your thread title is A GOD DAMNED LIE

― Thomas Tallis (Tommy), Saturday, 20 January 2007 02:32 (nineteen years ago)

Sorry i know this ones gonna devolve into fat jokes and nabisco otms but...shit irks me!

― acid waffle house (dubplatestyle), Saturday, 20 January 2007 02:54 (nineteen years ago)

Ive become everything ive ever hated.

― acid waffle house (dubplatestyle), Saturday, 20 January 2007 02:55 (nineteen years ago)

it's ok! green beans are soooooo awesome alone! raw or barely steamed! why would you fry them?????

― more grease in the pianissimo. (tehresa), Saturday, 20 January 2007 02:59 (nineteen years ago)

you know what's good is bacon tempura dipped in caramel

― ‘•’u (gear), Saturday, 20 January 2007 03:01 (nineteen years ago)

it's funny how i love ranch dressing yet some part of me kinda 'objectively' finds it disgusting.

― J.D. (Justyn Dillingham), Saturday, 20 January 2007 03:04 (nineteen years ago)

23 year old me is reading 28 year old me dissing fried food and weeping.

― acid waffle house (dubplatestyle), Saturday, 20 January 2007 03:07 (nineteen years ago)

Q: How to get a BJ from a sorority girl?
A: Dip yr dick in ranch dressing.

― Laurel (Laurel), Saturday, 20 January 2007 03:08 (nineteen years ago)

damn!

― more grease in the pianissimo. (tehresa), Saturday, 20 January 2007 03:11 (nineteen years ago)

who needs a bj after that dipping?

― Chesty Joe Morgan (Chesty Joe Morgan), Saturday, 20 January 2007 03:11 (nineteen years ago)

Because ranch dressing has to be refrigerated...therefore COLD.

― Laurel (Laurel), Saturday, 20 January 2007 03:16 (nineteen years ago)

Oh god oops, what else are you suggesting be done with it?!

― Trayce (trayce), Saturday, 20 January 2007 03:19 (nineteen years ago)

PS HI OOPS MSN me some time fucker.

― Trayce (trayce), Saturday, 20 January 2007 03:19 (nineteen years ago)

Wait, which one of us is "ooops"?

― Laurel (Laurel), Saturday, 20 January 2007 03:21 (nineteen years ago)

Chesty Joe. Sorry Laurel didn't mean to confuse!

― Trayce (trayce), Saturday, 20 January 2007 03:21 (nineteen years ago)

Ah, I haven't kept up.

― Laurel (Laurel), Saturday, 20 January 2007 03:23 (nineteen years ago)

i didn't know either but i guessed it was chesty joe cause it seemed appropriate from the xpostings.

― more grease in the pianissimo. (tehresa), Saturday, 20 January 2007 03:48 (nineteen years ago)

Ah ok now I see why the xpost was confusing, ha.

Is this deep fried greens thing some kind of tempura imitation? Or gloopier?

― Trayce (trayce), Saturday, 20 January 2007 03:52 (nineteen years ago)

I ate 1/3 of a deep-fried Mars bar when I was in Scotland, just to say I did it. It was gross, but not quite as bad as I expected.

― A knife to his wife Eve and his credibility. (goodbra), Saturday, 20 January 2007 04:31 (nineteen years ago)

guys what about people who eat their pizza with ranch dressing

(they're totally appalling, is what)

― Bernard Snowy (sixteen sergeants), Saturday, 20 January 2007 04:57 (nineteen years ago)

eeeeeeeeeeew

― more grease in the pianissimo. (tehresa), Saturday, 20 January 2007 05:12 (nineteen years ago)

omg i saw the worst shit w/r/t ranch and pizza

― attack all monsters (skowly), Saturday, 20 January 2007 05:16 (nineteen years ago)

guys let's think about this. pizza - italian. ranch - not so italian. unless you're going for spaghetti western. but let's face it, that's a stretch.

― more grease in the pianissimo. (tehresa), Saturday, 20 January 2007 05:18 (nineteen years ago)

Ranch and pizza: I haven't done this since around the time I started hating marijuana, but seriously, DON'T KNOCK IT TILL YOU'VE TRIED IT!

― a puppy holding a miller high life bottle (unclejessjess), Saturday, 20 January 2007 05:19 (nineteen years ago)

my friend XXXX found a video tape on the beach near NYC (don't ask me where)...brought it back to campus. we watched it. started off with a biggish lady eating pizza w/ranch dressing, being asked questions by some guy offscreen (the cameraman). whatever.

― attack all monsters (skowly), Saturday, 20 January 2007 05:24 (nineteen years ago)

CUT TO: THEM HAVING SEX IN THE SOFT BLUE GLOW OF A TELEVISION

― attack all monsters (skowly), Saturday, 20 January 2007 05:25 (nineteen years ago)

At what age should I give up my dream of deep frying a frozen pizza

― A B C (sparklecock), Saturday, 20 January 2007 05:26 (nineteen years ago)

I don't mind the pizza/ranch idea at all.

― Beth Parker (Beth Parker), Saturday, 20 January 2007 05:27 (nineteen years ago)

you obviously have never found amateur porn on a beach

― attack all monsters (skowly), Saturday, 20 January 2007 05:30 (nineteen years ago)

ranch dressing is repulsive

― slam your doors in golden silence (get bent), Saturday, 20 January 2007 05:32 (nineteen years ago)

oh pizza + ranch sauce reminds me of http://www.bigsausagepizza.com, except replace ranch sauce with semen sauce.

btw, im actually kinda wanting to go to the times square TGI Fridays and try the $12.99 3-course prix-fixe, but then Jean-Georges has a $28 prix fixe lunch too, so maybe that would be better

― phil-two (phil-two), Saturday, 20 January 2007 06:46 (nineteen years ago)

At what age should I give up my dream of deep frying a frozen pizza

Come to Scotland. Any chip shop in the land will do it for you. That's how they serve pizza here! (they do real pizzas too, but the deep-fried pizza supper is one of life's marvellous inventions)

― ailsa (ailsa), Saturday, 20 January 2007 07:55 (nineteen years ago)

I never knew they didn't have ranch dressing in the UK until I got over here. I always found that people from Northern California were super into ranch dressing as a side for anything.

― Tiki Theater Xymposium (Bent Over at the Arclight), Saturday, 20 January 2007 10:50 (nineteen years ago)

Ranch dressing is just, well, wet, isn't it? It doesn't really *taste* of anything.

― === temporary username === (Mark C), Saturday, 20 January 2007 12:39 (nineteen years ago)

― Tiki Theater Xymposium (Bent Over at the Arclight), Saturday, 20 January 2007 13:15 (nineteen years ago)

I like to watch the food channel while pwning the cross-trainer machine at my gym, irnonic eh? anyway I recently saw show that sums up everything fucked up abt american eating habits. called something like extreme donutz it featured a shoppe/bakery that custom-made the deepfried treats with your choice of 1)creamy filling AND 2)glaze/frosting AND 3)another topping on top of that. jesus christ why not INJECT MAYONAAISE INTO YR VEINS or just save time and jump off a fucking cliff. added roffle: host/producer of the show was jolly weatherman/former fat fuck AL ROKER offering words of encouragement to all you cruller hos out there. This from a guy who got his stomach stapled...sorry I don't get it.

and I grew up on classic us meat-heavy processed food diet and even after 20 yrs of so healthy corrective eats I AM PAYING THE PRICE of all those hamburger casseroles so plz don't call me eleatist.

― lovebug 2.0 (lovebug starski), Saturday, 20 January 2007 13:20 (nineteen years ago)

i am not going to post on this thread.

― chaki (chaki), Saturday, 20 January 2007 14:00 (nineteen years ago)

Rolling junkfood/fastfood thread.

― Candy: tastes like chicken, if chicken was a candy. (Austin, Still), Saturday, 20 January 2007 15:51 (nineteen years ago)

lol eleastist.

Ranch dressing is just, well, wet, isn't it? It doesn't really *taste* of anything.

-- === temporary username === (boyincorduro...), January 19th, 2007 11:39 PM. (Mark C) (later) (link)

actually now that you mention it... it tastes of salt and often other undeterminable flavorings and it's bringing up associations now such that i'm thinking i might not ever want to eat ranch dressing again.

― more grease in the pianissimo. (tehresa), Saturday, 20 January 2007 16:07 (nineteen years ago)

I used to get calzones from the pizza place in the hospital cafeteria all the time cuz they were good and quick and cheap, but then a new guy started making them and I am pretty sure he puts ranch dressing mix in the plain cheese ones. DO NOT WANT

― Bernard Snowy (sixteen sergeants), Saturday, 20 January 2007 16:09 (nineteen years ago)

EWWWWW

― Surmounter (rra123), Saturday, 20 January 2007 16:10 (nineteen years ago)

WHAT IS WRONG WITH ALL YOU PEOPLE?????? RANCH DRESSING IS DELICIOUS!!!!!!!! BUY PAUL NEWMAN'S!!!!!!

― Beth Parker (Beth Parker), Saturday, 20 January 2007 16:42 (nineteen years ago)

it just seems like if you put a box labeled "american food" into a time capsule so future generations and different countries and galaxies can get to the core of what made us tick, there would be a gigantic TUB of ranch dressing in that box. my version of idiocracy has the ugly americans drinking ranch dressing instead of gatorade.

― slam your doors in golden silence (get bent), Saturday, 20 January 2007 18:21 (nineteen years ago)

this may not be healthy but it sounds very yummy!

― Ms Misery (MissMiseryTX), Saturday, 20 January 2007 18:33 (nineteen years ago)

Don't throw the ranch-baby out with the scornworthy lowbrow Amurican bathwater!

― Beth Parker (Beth Parker), Saturday, 20 January 2007 18:35 (nineteen years ago)

Mark, have you had ranch dressing? It's hard to pin down beyond "herbal, creamy, and tangy" -- in the Midwest, a dozen things are labelled as XYZ Ranch that would be called other things elsewhere -- but it's not really a mild flavor.

― Tep (ktepi), Saturday, 20 January 2007 20:32 (nineteen years ago)

baby carrots dipped in ranch is happy food.

― Beth Parker (Beth Parker), Saturday, 20 January 2007 20:33 (nineteen years ago)

"Ranch" at the restaurant I used to work at, fwiw:

buttermilk
"salad dressing" -- miracle whip
chives
dill
lemon juice
salt
pepper
garlic powder

...maybe parsely too, I can't remember exactly.

People ate the shit out of it (including on pizza), we'd make 3-4 gallons of the stuff a day.

― daniel striped tiger (OutDatWay), Saturday, 20 January 2007 20:42 (nineteen years ago)

Yeah, the basics are buttermilk/mayo/green onion/herbs (i.e. Hidden Valley Ranch, the original), but in the 80s-ish, "ranch" became a signifier like "salsa" (or "pesto," like it or not). I've seen a lot of ranch dressings that are just Green Goddess or Thousand Island, re-labelled.

― Tep (ktepi), Saturday, 20 January 2007 20:47 (nineteen years ago)

Ranch dressing,
You have got the edge
for creamy dressing on my wedge
(Of iceberg lettuce, silly perves)
Their mocking shall not make me swerve.
how safe it is to trust in you
if the diner's out of bleu.

― Beth Parker (Beth Parker), Saturday, 20 January 2007 20:50 (nineteen years ago)

Tasty treat that is not to be missed/dissed: deep fried pickles! One clubby sort of bar in Greensboro, NC did a sort of fancy version of this with a seasoned cornmeal crust and a creamy wasabi dip. Yum.

― a puppy holding a miller high life bottle (unclejessjess), Saturday, 20 January 2007 20:57 (nineteen years ago)

Also, something some of you may have already heard-- During my stay in New Orleans I had the opportunity to spend a day meeting people from way down in the bayous and eating with them. At every meal the food was fried, and at lunch at a tiny seafood restaurant *every single item* on my plate was fried-- oysters, catfish, shrimp, hush puppies, "crab fingers," and even the dinner rolls. It was delicious. This plus etoufees and grilled oysters pretty much sums up my summer.

(I gained 25 lbs. and I had my cholesterol tested recently and things are really grim.)

― a puppy holding a miller high life bottle (unclejessjess), Saturday, 20 January 2007 21:04 (nineteen years ago)

there was that dude on The Real World London who was from Texas or something who went shopping on his first day in England and couldn't find any ranch dressing and started going completely off

man I hated that dude

― Thomas Tallis (Tommy), Saturday, 20 January 2007 23:23 (nineteen years ago)

also, green bean pakoras, common at good chaat bars, are the fucking bomb, especially when you add a little tamarind chutney

― Thomas Tallis (Tommy), Saturday, 20 January 2007 23:23 (nineteen years ago)

iirc donuts are generally better for you than bagels

― UART variations (ex machina), Saturday, 20 January 2007 23:57 (nineteen years ago)

I just can't eat salad greens with creamy dressings. It totally ruins the cripsiness and texture of the salad. Just a really plain drizzle of good olive oil and balsamic or lemon juice for me.

― Trayce (trayce), Sunday, 21 January 2007 00:26 (nineteen years ago)

Potato salad otoh has gotta have a big pile of creamy mayo/herby goodness on it.

― Trayce (trayce), Sunday, 21 January 2007 00:26 (nineteen years ago)

Mark, have you had ranch dressing? It's hard to pin down beyond "herbal, creamy, and tangy"

Tep, yes I have, several times in both the US and here. The only thing I can think of that's less "tasty" is bechamel, and that's supposed to be a filler/moistener rather than a sauce. I mean, it's harmless enough, but in a world of sauces, why put something you can hardly taste on your food? If it's too dry, cook it better!

― === temporary username === (Mark C), Sunday, 21 January 2007 00:30 (nineteen years ago)

See, that sounds more like mayo. I mean, I don't particularly like ranch dressing, but it's flavorful! Not as sharp as a vinaigrette, but still, up there with other creamy dressings and dips.

― Tep (ktepi), Sunday, 21 January 2007 00:34 (nineteen years ago)

Mayo is FAR more flavourful than ranch dressing. It's slightly salty wetness. Please, tell me a brand to try!

― === temporary username === (Mark C), Sunday, 21 January 2007 00:38 (nineteen years ago)

Mayo is an ingredient in ranch dressing! Well, mayo or a close substitute, but there's nothing in the former that isn't in the latter. I mean, that's what it was for decades, a seasoning blend you added to buttermilk/mayo/cream, depending on the year and your preference.

I don't know, it's not really my kind of thing, so I'm hard-pressed for a recommendation. Though maybe someone else should chime in, too -- I guess it might "taste stronger" to me just because I don't like it much.

― Tep (ktepi), Sunday, 21 January 2007 00:43 (nineteen years ago)

Maybe this is the moment to mention Lipton onion soup dip.

― Beth Parker (Beth Parker), Sunday, 21 January 2007 01:46 (nineteen years ago)

I like to dip french fries into mayo/ranch/bleu cheese dressing and tartar sauce! Not all at the same time.
When I'm on a health kick, I use french fries as a vehicle for cole slaw.
However, I do not eat french fries every day. i limit it to four times per week.
Re: Lipton Onion Soup powdered mix - I love that it is now acknowledged as a powdered DIP mix, and not as some weird soup thing. For years, Lipton kept trying to pretend that it was a soup mix...when all reasonable americans were eating Top Ramen for soup and using the powdered, mysterious yumminess ONLY with gigantic dollops of sour cream.

― aimurchie (aimurchie), Sunday, 21 January 2007 02:58 (nineteen years ago)

Yeah, Lipton Onion is the dip I grew up with. (Well, really I grew up with Wise Green Onion dip mix packets, but close enough.) I never even heard of ranch dressing as a dip until the Doritos came out and even then it was another few years before I saw it. (nb I was raised in bland-loving New Hampshire where ranch is just way too complicated a taste to catch on until the zeitgeist left the Granite State no choice.)

― Tep (ktepi), Sunday, 21 January 2007 03:16 (nineteen years ago)

Ranch a complicated taste? That sounds like Australia before the 1980s where garlic was this "weird thing wogs eat" and no one would touch it.

― Trayce (trayce), Sunday, 21 January 2007 04:22 (nineteen years ago)

New Hampshire - Live Free Or Die! Without a good dip!

― aimurchie (aimurchie), Sunday, 21 January 2007 05:24 (nineteen years ago)

Ranch and Mayo serve similar purposes:

Food lube!

Mmmmmmm.... makes the roughest salad go down easy!

― Matt Olken (Moodles), Sunday, 21 January 2007 05:38 (nineteen years ago)

Our local supermarket, HEB, sells a salsa ranch dressing that I've really been enjoying lately. Spicy salad! Mmmmmmm.... yeah....

― Matt Olken (Moodles), Sunday, 21 January 2007 05:39 (nineteen years ago)

mayonnaise and spicy salsa is my favorite! You have to "cut" the salsa /spice with sour cream or mayonnaise to really deliver the flavour.
I love bechamel and hollandaise as well - I like creamy.I love savory with savory, combined.

― aimurchie (aimurchie), Sunday, 21 January 2007 06:18 (nineteen years ago)

this may not be healthy but it sounds very yummy!

Succinct and factual. A++

― Charlie Brown (kenan), Sunday, 21 January 2007 06:43 (nineteen years ago)

Before I scrolled down through the list of new messages, I wrote this down:

Weirdly enough, I have NEVER liked ranch dressing or indeed any gloppy, mayonnaisey salad dressing. My first favorite dressing was French dressing, then I latched onto Catalina, and now my favorite is Italian dressing. I also love Balsamic vinaigrette. And I am far from being a healthy food eater. I love me some fried chicken and messy swiss mushroom burgers, oh yes. But I can't abide by ranch dressing or anything similar on my salad. Or croutons. I don't like croutons.

So weird to see my thoughts paralleled almost exactly by Trayce. I had no idea there was someone else (not me) who held the same ideas. And yes, potato salad requires that mayonnaisey gloppiness (though please, NO SUGAR AT ALL and get that Miracle Whip away from my presence because it's hurl-worthy).

Matt Olken, "local supermarket" = HEB? You must live around here.

― Phoenix Dancing (krushsister), Sunday, 21 January 2007 06:58 (nineteen years ago)

I prefer french fries with mayonnaise.

― Charlie Brown (kenan), Sunday, 21 January 2007 07:00 (nineteen years ago)

Ooh, HEB sells freeze-dried, seasoned lentils in bulk, I think they're supposed to be for soup? But if you cut back on the water & add S/P they make a lovely savory paste for breakfast. Friend from Texas used to ship them to me!

― Laurel (Laurel), Sunday, 21 January 2007 07:02 (nineteen years ago)

mmm... paste.

― Charlie Brown (kenan), Sunday, 21 January 2007 07:11 (nineteen years ago)

If I had to add up all the things I miss about Texas, I think HEB might be on top. Especially Central Market.

― Charlie Brown (kenan), Sunday, 21 January 2007 07:12 (nineteen years ago)

How the hell did lentils get onto this thread?
I love lentils, and they are healthy, but they aren't a snack!

― aimurchie (aimurchie), Sunday, 21 January 2007 07:32 (nineteen years ago)

No, you're right.

WHAT THE FUCKING FUCK! I AM OUTRAGED!

― Charlie Brown (kenan), Sunday, 21 January 2007 07:51 (nineteen years ago)

Matt Olken, "local supermarket" = HEB? You must live around here.

Not sure where "here" is, but I live in Austin.

How the hell did lentils get onto this thread?

I can't stand lentils - they'd gross me out even if they were fried and smothered in Ranch dressing.

This thread is starting to disturb the crap out of me.

― Matt Olken (Moodles), Sunday, 21 January 2007 08:38 (nineteen years ago)

http://www.jefframirez.com/ilx/beach2.jpg

― Charlie Brown (kenan), Sunday, 21 January 2007 08:49 (nineteen years ago)

http://velonews.com/galleries/contest12a/There%20is%20no%20crying%20in%20cycling!%20by%20Luke%20Seemann.jpg

― Matt Olken (Moodles), Sunday, 21 January 2007 09:03 (nineteen years ago)

Ranch a complicated taste? That sounds like Australia before the 1980s where garlic was this "weird thing wogs eat" and no one would touch it.

It IS a complicated taste, though, unless some ranch-loving American wants to step in and agree with Mark about it being almost flavorless. Good, bad, or mundane, it's got a dozen different herbs and seasonings in there in addition to the tang and fattiness -- it's not that it's a foreign taste (though herbs and spices have no real place in traditional New Hampshire cuisine, and when I was a kid this area was still rural enough for that to matter), just that it has too many flavors going on at once for it to fit in.

― Tep (ktepi), Sunday, 21 January 2007 11:43 (nineteen years ago)

Just like a prom dress, made out of carpet remnants!

― Trayce (trayce), Sunday, 21 January 2007 12:16 (nineteen years ago)

I sometimes go for the creamy dressings at our local market's salad bar because their approximations of vinaigrette are so awful—suffused with rancid onion juice and whatever else gives bottled dressing that ick taste. And often they are billed as lo- or no-fat, which means it's just vinegar and corn syrup, or something like that. And the olive oil they offer in the dopey cruet is always that yellow second-pressing stuff. I used to just take a small bottle of extra-virgin from the shelves and leave it at the salad bar, but then managment PUT UP A SIGN.
One summer I kept a bottle of extra virgin olive oil and one of balsamic vinegar in my car, because I was eating a lot of salad bar salads and even I draw the line at eating the gunky dressings every day.

― Beth Parker (Beth Parker), Sunday, 21 January 2007 18:42 (nineteen years ago)

That sounds like Australia before the 1980s where garlic was this "weird thing wogs eat" and no one would touch it.

australians didnt eat garlic before the 80s??

― phil-two (phil-two), Sunday, 21 January 2007 19:13 (nineteen years ago)

It doesn't go with a koala taco.

― Ed (dali), Sunday, 21 January 2007 19:15 (nineteen years ago)

I'm not going to fight the "does ranch taste?" battle. It's herby and tangy and full of fatty things for awesome mouth-feel. Fin.

There there, little girl, socks in sandals make Auntie Laurel cry, too. Just let it out, you'll feel better.

― Laurel (Laurel), Sunday, 21 January 2007 19:20 (nineteen years ago)

Phil: up until the 60-70s, really only the migrant Europeans ate decent food - anglo aussies like my family stuck to bland war-era english stuff, the meat & 3 veg crap. My mother always likes to go on about how no one used garlic in things, or had espresso coffee. I found a 70s cookbook in my stash the other day that said to cook spaghetti pasta for FIFTEEN TO TWENTY MINUTES. It'd be MUSH by then.

― Trayce (trayce), Sunday, 21 January 2007 21:23 (nineteen years ago)

Mind you in Melb and Sydney things probably got better earlier, but I grew up in a country town.

― Trayce (trayce), Sunday, 21 January 2007 21:23 (nineteen years ago)

(Actually I recall reading that WWII was the big watershed for American cuisine, insofar as soldiers came back from Italy and France and told people amazing stories about how they used these exotic things called "spices" and "seasoning" over there -- which U.S. cuisine remained massively afraid of even as they assimilated them: the first use of garlic in a Crocker book calls for one clove in an entire large saucepan of spaghetti sauce, and you were meant to stick the clove on a toothpick so you could take it out later.)

-- nabisco (--...), September 20th, 2002 10:45 AM. (nabisco)

― Michael Daddino (epicharmus), Sunday, 21 January 2007 23:05 (nineteen years ago)

Yeah, that's not quite right. I mean, I think it's true of the Betty Crocker cookbook, but that wasn't representative of the whole or majority of "American cooking." The question of who exactly the intended audience was for a cookbook introduced right after canned goods and Bisquick became household staples, and what that audience's cooking/eating background was, is ... well, a whole nother question that hasn't got anything to do with ranch dressing, I guess.

Histories of American cooking that talk about its blandness and lack of seasoning tend to conveniently ignore half the country and the immigrant communities in the other half.

― Tep (ktepi), Sunday, 21 January 2007 23:13 (nineteen years ago)

Hah, Michael I actually remember Nabisco posting that.

― Trayce (trayce), Sunday, 21 January 2007 23:17 (nineteen years ago)

You're right, Tep, but I'm from the Betty Crocker half and so find its lame-ness amusing. So much spaghetti sauce sans garlic or fresh basil or anything, so much pot roast, so much apple pie. None of it bad, mind you, but now I wonder what I ate before I picked up on garlic and hummus and black beans and assorted staples.

― Laurel (Laurel), Sunday, 21 January 2007 23:18 (nineteen years ago)

And yeah Tep thats what I meant too. I mean we've had immigrants here since the 1800s, so clearly *someone* was eating Italian and Chinese and Greek food all along.

But even when I was a kid inthe 80s, anglo aussie kids would bitch about the smell of garlic!

We went to a french restaurant when I was in year 8 French (that'd be in 1984) and my god you've never heard such complaining about the "gross weird food". Ironically, from Greek and Croatian girls. GO fig.

― Trayce (trayce), Sunday, 21 January 2007 23:19 (nineteen years ago)

I credit marijuana for opening my tastebuds to new sensations, and perhaps the tastebuds of the nation.

― Beth Parker (Beth Parker), Sunday, 21 January 2007 23:21 (nineteen years ago)

Sure, like I said above, I was raised in New Hampshire -- my mother's boyfriend (he's Of An Older Generation) won't eat pizza or spaghetti very often because they're "ethnic food" and "have too much flavor," and I was in my teens before I'd ever had the opportunity to try Mexican or Chinese food. The four iconic dishes of the region -- boiled lobster with drawn butter, the mayo lobster roll, baked beans, and "New England boiled dinner" (corned beef and cabbage) -- are almost completely unseasoned. I totally get it, I'm just saying, that's never been the whole of America. Even in the thirteen colonies, ramps have been used for centuries -- curry in the form of country captain chicken is almost as old as the Union -- etc.

― Tep (ktepi), Sunday, 21 January 2007 23:26 (nineteen years ago)

*shrug* I don't know. My grandparents came over here in the '20s and my parents always used, like, cilantro and onion and garlic and jalapeños and chili powder, that kind of thing. Though things like basil and oregano WERE considered exotica and I didn't start using those in things until I started cooking in the late '90s. I did notice that most of the spice usage happened when Dad cooked and that Mom seemed to hold back some when it came to flavoring up things she cooked. Dad learned to cook at home, while Mom learned via home economics lessons at her high school. So it was probably with the mainstream type of "you need a recipe" food that not much spice or flavor was used.

As for HEB, the one near where I moved to recently actually has a bulk foods section, so I will have to check out their selection of freeze-dried bulk lentils. And Matt Olken, I love about 90 mi SE of you.

― Phoenix Dancing (krushsister), Sunday, 21 January 2007 23:31 (nineteen years ago)

*blink* I have no idea why I just began that post with "*shrug* I don't know." Maybe that was meant to be an xpost. I forget.

― Phoenix Dancing (krushsister), Sunday, 21 January 2007 23:32 (nineteen years ago)

And WAIT, I do know one dish where we HAD to use dried basil or else it just didn't turn out right -- our homemade cornbread dressing. The family recipe definitely calls for dried basil and poultry seasoning. But that was the only time I remember consuming something with that kind of spice in it when I was growing up.

― Phoenix Dancing (krushsister), Sunday, 21 January 2007 23:35 (nineteen years ago)

Also, I damn near bought Hidden Valley Ranch mix this afternoon thanks to this thread, and I DID look for Wise Green Onion mix. (They don't seem to carry Wise products here anymore. So long, Dipsy Doodles.)

― Tep (ktepi), Sunday, 21 January 2007 23:37 (nineteen years ago)

I like ranch dressing. It's a good change from ketchup on onion rings. I also like thousand island dressing, my go-to salad dressing when I'm at a place too cheap to have decent bleu cheese. (HI DERE PICKLE'S DRIVE-IN.)

― do i have to draw you a diaphragm (Rock Hardy), Sunday, 21 January 2007 23:49 (nineteen years ago)

When people talk about the once-upon-a-time blandness of American cuisine, they're referring to what was once regarded by Americans (from all backgrounds, all walks of life) and non-Americans (Lin Yutang's The Importance of Living immediately comes to mind) alike as quintessentially American food. The fact many Americans didn't follow this script is sort of besides the point -- the stuff they cooked was...well, it may have been made by Americans in America but it wasn't American necessarily, not even to the Americans who made it.

When did people start thinking of Chinese-American cuisine as being American? ("People" referring to non-Chinese Americans, Chinese-Americans, and non-Americans alike.) Likewise, when did people start regarding chili as being American rather than Spanishy or Mexicany?

― Michael Daddino (epicharmus), Sunday, 21 January 2007 23:57 (nineteen years ago)

For chili, I think the answer is around 1900.

― do i have to draw you a diaphragm (Rock Hardy), Monday, 22 January 2007 00:02 (nineteen years ago)

Yeah, this is when the thread veers into a lot of the stuff on my mental list of subjects I don't get into on ILX.

― Tep (ktepi), Monday, 22 January 2007 00:04 (nineteen years ago)

― Michael Daddino (epicharmus), Monday, 22 January 2007 00:11 (nineteen years ago)

Likewise, when did people start regarding chili as being American rather than Spanishy or Mexicany?

My mom, who is Mexican, says that she had never known of chili before moving to the states. Apparently it's more Tex than Mex.

― GEAUX SAINTS. (unclejessjess), Monday, 22 January 2007 01:04 (nineteen years ago)

And Matt Olken, I love about 90 mi SE of you.

Freudian slip, Dee?

As for ranch, hardly tasteless mayo substitute. For the person who wanted recs, probably Paul Newman's would be good. Or Bob's Big Boy if you can get that there.

― nickn (nickn), Monday, 22 January 2007 04:39 (nineteen years ago)

And Matt Olken, I love about 90 mi SE of you.

Freudian slip, Dee?

Oh shit. I do love it here, but there were no Freudian subtexts that should have been addressed via that slip-up.

Chili is very American, though it became popular when Mexican immigrants cooked it up in street stalls. So it's actually Tex-Mex. And never in a billion years would have cinnamon in it, not even a drop.

― Phoenix Dancing (krushsister), Monday, 22 January 2007 05:15 (nineteen years ago)

What is really weird though is that 17th and 18th England and by extension New England (although less so due to availability I guess) was into quite heavily spiced food even quite far down the social ladder and this appears to have disappeared during the 19th century. I've got a reprint of a 18th century cookbook and there is a lot in there about creating sauces, relishes and ketchups to eek out meagre supplies of spice (the anchovy ketchup recipe, more of a worcestershire sauce in fact, being a fine example that makes it into my cooking regularly).

Spicing was as much a part of disguising poor or repetitive ingredients in north European cooking (and descendants) as in India or Mexico or wherever, the only difference seems to be that, owing the rise of processed food and the cold chain in the 19th century; allowing northerners to vary their ingredient and keep the 'quality' up, no where moreso than in the USA, people discarded the old traditions.

― Ed (dali), Monday, 22 January 2007 07:56 (nineteen years ago)

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