I Need a Record Contract

Message Bookmarked

Bookmark Removed

Does anyone know of any labels that would sign the shit out of my band? I post about them a lot on here. TELEPHONE POLES.

http://www.geocities.com/telephonepolesmusic

Does anyone know of any small labels that I would be a leg in?

― Michael Costello (MichaelCostello1), Tuesday, 28 June 2005 16:51 (nineteen years ago)

You have a curious way about you.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Tuesday, 28 June 2005 16:53 (nineteen years ago)

I'm a maniac on the dancefloor. What can I say?

― Michael Costello (MichaelCostello1), Tuesday, 28 June 2005 16:55 (nineteen years ago)

Michael Sembello calls you.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Tuesday, 28 June 2005 16:56 (nineteen years ago)

Get Winona Ryder to join your band. Rename "Winona & The Poles".

Troubleman, here you come!

― Pat Moretti, Tuesday, 28 June 2005 16:58 (nineteen years ago)

Michael, you and I live in the same town (according to your previous posts), so I'll actually answer your question seriously, which very few people on here are going to do. Always nice to support the hometown crowd.

I looked at your site, and I noticed that you have no live show dates scheduled. My advice is to first concentrate on playing shows, and worry about getting signed later. If you're really hot to record something, pay for some studio time and record a demo with a few songs on it (or if you've got recording gear at home or know someone who does, all the better). Once you've got those things more in hand, you can begin to worry about labels.

― cdwill (cdwill), Tuesday, 28 June 2005 17:08 (nineteen years ago)

I would do shows but I have no Band Members. Plus I have recorded some demos on my computer. I'm just looking for a label to send my demos to, or maybe even a radio station or something.

Where are you from? You wanna join my band?

― Michael Costello (MichaelCostello1), Tuesday, 28 June 2005 17:10 (nineteen years ago)

Email me through this site.

― Chris Williams (cdwill), Tuesday, 28 June 2005 17:21 (nineteen years ago)

What do you want a label to do for you that you can't do yourself?

― Joseph McCombs (Joseph McCombs), Tuesday, 28 June 2005 17:22 (nineteen years ago)

get me on the MTV, duh!

― Michael Costello (MichaelCostello1), Tuesday, 28 June 2005 17:24 (nineteen years ago)

email you what, chris?

― Michael Costello (MichaelCostello1), Tuesday, 28 June 2005 17:25 (nineteen years ago)

HOW NAIVE ARE YOU?!?!?!

...sorry.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Tuesday, 28 June 2005 17:26 (nineteen years ago)

(The MTV thing was sarcastic)

I just want to be on a label, it sounds like fun.

― Michael Costello (MichaelCostello1), Tuesday, 28 June 2005 17:27 (nineteen years ago)

One thing that's always nice is a good nickname, and I think in your case "The TPs" fits the bill nicely.

― k/l (Ken L), Tuesday, 28 June 2005 17:28 (nineteen years ago)

Thanks K/L. Somepeople who know about my band call it T. Poles

Weird.

― Michael Costello (MichaelCostello1), Tuesday, 28 June 2005 17:30 (nineteen years ago)

I just want to be on a label, it sounds like fun.

The last word might be optional... Or else, fit "fun" between "on" and "a"...

― t\'\'t (t\'\'t), Tuesday, 28 June 2005 17:33 (nineteen years ago)

What I'm saying is: I'll be happy to help you, but we should discuss it through email, not on a public forum like ILM. So email me.

― Chris Williams (cdwill), Tuesday, 28 June 2005 17:34 (nineteen years ago)

No, It Sounds Like Fun. That's It!

― Michael Costello (MichaelCostello1), Tuesday, 28 June 2005 17:35 (nineteen years ago)

sign right here...

(img src="http://trust-me-swan.cocolog-nifty.com/death_records_logo.jpg">

― Bobby Peru (Bobby Peru), Tuesday, 28 June 2005 18:23 (nineteen years ago)

HHHAAAAAYYYYYYYYYYY!

ok!

― Michael Costello (MichaelCostello1), Tuesday, 28 June 2005 18:24 (nineteen years ago)

Dude. Hire a drummer and re-record those demos.

― Brooker Buckingham (Brooker B), Tuesday, 28 June 2005 18:28 (nineteen years ago)

that's the idea, Brooker.

― Michael Costello (MichaelCostello1), Tuesday, 28 June 2005 18:29 (nineteen years ago)

First thing you do, you stop plugging your band on ILM. You have to realize what enormous feat of restraint it takes for dozens of the board's regulars not to do the same.

Then, channel your considerable attitude into your live stage show and find a proxy to shill for you (girlfriends are good at that, up to a point).

― joseph cotten (joseph cotten), Tuesday, 28 June 2005 18:31 (nineteen years ago)

Oh, and shell out $30 for a domain name, son. Geocities? Come the fuck on.

― joseph cotten (joseph cotten), Tuesday, 28 June 2005 18:32 (nineteen years ago)

Answers to Joseph's advice:

1. I like posting my band on ILM. It's fun and expected in many ways.

2. I don't have any other band members to do a Live Show. I tried but everyone in NJ is into Metal Cover Bands or Emo.

3. What's a Proxy?

4. Geocities is Free and I can shell out $30 for a meal at Bennigans rather than a Telephonepoles.com. When I get signed, that's the day I will shell out 30 clams (no pun intended)

― Michael Costello (MichaelCostello1), Tuesday, 28 June 2005 18:36 (nineteen years ago)

Proxy is your new band name.

― joseph cotten (joseph cotten), Tuesday, 28 June 2005 18:37 (nineteen years ago)

No, I already know guys with that name.

― Michael Costello (MichaelCostello1), Tuesday, 28 June 2005 18:40 (nineteen years ago)

Michael Costello can i get your sister email why because she look intersting

― NAthaniel, Tuesday, 28 June 2005 18:40 (nineteen years ago)

I would give you my sister's email but I don't have a Sister. Where do you see that?

― Michael Costello (MichaelCostello1), Tuesday, 28 June 2005 18:41 (nineteen years ago)

"The First Basement Rock Band!"

This makes me think you're out of touch.

― Stoner Guy, Tuesday, 28 June 2005 18:53 (nineteen years ago)

out of touch could be the next big thing. i'll sign you ... but only if you're like in the realm of "Nell" out of touch... which sounds like its a possibility :) -just kiddin.

― Susan Douglas (Susan Douglas), Tuesday, 28 June 2005 18:55 (nineteen years ago)

sorry taken dood

www.telephonepoles.com

maybe you could call your band exuberant capitalization

― b'angelo, Tuesday, 28 June 2005 19:01 (nineteen years ago)

[begin dream sequence]

Michael,

I am the ghost of xmas future. Please choose your words carefully and search for sarcasm in others . Keep on making music but go light on the promotion. Tweak your sound, research, enjoy, and tweak your sound again. And learn the value of owning your copyrights. A deal is not what ye seek.

I cannot answer any firther questions as I must now return to the netherworld.

[end dream sequence]

― Cichael Mostello, Tuesday, 28 June 2005 19:09 (nineteen years ago)

Michael, I think in 99% of cases, the labels contact the artist, not the other way around. Of course, you might be that 1%, so don't listen to me!

― darin (darin), Tuesday, 28 June 2005 19:17 (nineteen years ago)

HOW NAIVE ARE YOU?!?!?!

*juice flies out nose*

Ned, I didn't think you had it in you ;)

― cicatrix, Tuesday, 28 June 2005 22:50 (nineteen years ago)

http://www.geocities.com/telephonepolesmusic

Thanks, Brian Hall.

― Michael Costello (MichaelCostello1), Wednesday, 29 June 2005 00:57 (nineteen years ago)

Send in demos to 5 Rue Christine (like I plan to, whenever the hell I can get access to a CD burner -- which doesn't seem likely to happen anytime soon). If they signed Deerhoof and Xiu Xiu, they'll sign anything! Especially if you happen to make something "experimental" and electronically-inclined.

― Ian Riese-Moraine has been xeroxed into a conduit! (Eastern Mantra), Wednesday, 29 June 2005 01:43 (nineteen years ago)

Make sure to send everything you've recorded on those demos, too. The more output, the better chance you have of making an impression.

― Ian Riese-Moraine has been xeroxed into a conduit! (Eastern Mantra), Wednesday, 29 June 2005 01:44 (nineteen years ago)

If they signed Deerhoof and Xiu Xiu, they'll sign anything!

Hahahahahahaaaa

― joseph cotten (joseph cotten), Wednesday, 29 June 2005 02:04 (nineteen years ago)

Deerhoof and Xiu Xiu kick face!

― Michael Costello (MichaelCostello1), Wednesday, 29 June 2005 02:17 (nineteen years ago)

You should consider changing your last name to McManus.

― joseph cotten (joseph cotten), Wednesday, 29 June 2005 02:21 (nineteen years ago)

ok, i will consider it. (I'm probably too new to know what that means)

― Michael Costello (MichaelCostello1), Wednesday, 29 June 2005 02:22 (nineteen years ago)

Your music sucks.

― Michael Copeland, Wednesday, 29 June 2005 02:22 (nineteen years ago)

Sorry, I had to be the first one to say it. It IS true though.

― Michael Copeland, Wednesday, 29 June 2005 02:23 (nineteen years ago)

See, finally a real judgement. You guys with you "You need to change the Drums" and the "You should get a better Mic" and shit should learn from Copeland.

― Michael Costello (MichaelCostello1), Wednesday, 29 June 2005 02:25 (nineteen years ago)

I see you're not familiar with Basement Rock, Mr. Copeland. It's the new baile funk.

― joseph cotten (joseph cotten), Wednesday, 29 June 2005 02:27 (nineteen years ago)

Yeah, it's pretty terrible. But, even though this minimal lofi type of shit has been done to death and done much, much, much, much better in the past, there will always be a new generation that needs to hear it in a "new" form first to introduce them to the idea that way cooler stuff has been made in the past and to seek it out. This is the role of bands like The Strokes. So, if the Telephone Poles get some better mics, drums, guitar sounds and slightly less boring arrangements, there could be a record contract on the horizon. Watch out you don't lose your shirt in the deal, as has been known to happen.

― Stoner Guy, Wednesday, 29 June 2005 02:44 (nineteen years ago)

See, finally a real judgement. You guys with you "You need to change the Drums" and the "You should get a better Mic" and shit should learn from Copeland.

-- Michael Costello (M_Co_8...), June 29th, 2005.

Seriously though, dude, you should spend a lot more time on your music before you go sticking your neck out by linking to your band not only here but on other unrelated threads. I know what you're probably thinking "A small label will pick me up and then I could achieve some kind of minor cult status through play on college radio stations around the country." Well, it ain't as easy as it sounds, and it gonna happen with the tracks you have there, so keep practicing.

― Hurting (Hurting), Wednesday, 29 June 2005 02:49 (nineteen years ago)

What's wrong with the Strokes?

Anyways, don't put me on Rolling Stone and Spin. They stunk for the past 5 years.

― Michael Costello (MichaelCostello1), Wednesday, 29 June 2005 02:50 (nineteen years ago)

Hurting,

You took my dream and raped it. Thanks for Raping my dream, Simon Cowell.

P.S. It's not easy but it's been done before.

P.S.S. This is the truth. I actually have a fanbase in Greece. I would let people download my album on soulseek and one of the guys was a DJ at some club. He put one of my songs on and people liked it. I actually got about 40 fans from soulseek.

― Michael Costello (MichaelCostello1), Wednesday, 29 June 2005 02:54 (nineteen years ago)

Take it from someone who has been doing this much longer than you have, who has at least managed to generate some interest from labels (though nothing we consider worthwhile) and who, by the way, has "fans" in countries such as Spain and Belgium, which doesn't amount to shit unless you're actually going to tour and/or sell your album in Europe.

If you want to get a label deal, even a small label, you need to do things more or less in this order ( I guess this is sort of repeating what's been said):

1) Add one or more musicians and record a better sounding demo

2) Use that demo to get local shows

3) Build up a local following by promoting those shows, and ESPECIALLY by playing well at those shows, which will only happen if you practice at least once or twice a week.

4) When you've refined your sound and skillz enough (maybe after a year or two) record an even better demo and send it to small labels, or record an album yourself, sell it yourself, and send that to labels.

5) Eventually branch out to a couple of other cities within driving distance and play those cities as well.

Of course, you might just get lucky and have a friend who has a label. You might also just start a label yourself. I mean anyone can fucking call themselves a "label." What is it your looking for by being on a "label"?

― Hurting (Hurting), Wednesday, 29 June 2005 03:01 (nineteen years ago)

Hurting, forget about it. I'm now convinced Mr. Costello is some sort of Situationist prankster (Michael, save yourself the trouble of posting "what's a Situationist?"). He has no actual intentions to promote, or indeed continue to play, his music and knows full well what he's doing, i. e. taking the piss out. I mean, if he were serious, he would know that he just blew a very real chance of getting some attention by being a pushy punk in a roomful of music writers.

― joseph cotten (joseph cotten), Wednesday, 29 June 2005 03:02 (nineteen years ago)

I just got lost in following band pages through myspace.com links... holy shit is it sad and weird, but I wish I had myspace when I was in high school. I would have loved to be promoting my band that was never going to make it to other bands that were never going to make it. It's weird to hear some of the lyrics. These chipmunk voices screaming about social mores. Does music still discuss such a lame subject or are these kids just picking up punk albums from 20 years ago? I hope I wasn't this embarrassing back then (but I know I was :-( ).

― Stoner Guy, Wednesday, 29 June 2005 03:03 (nineteen years ago)

I don't think he's exactly a prankster so much as he thinks he's being endearing.

― Hurting (Hurting), Wednesday, 29 June 2005 03:04 (nineteen years ago)

Yup, and we're playing into it by giving pseudo-paternal advice. I wish I had a bit more bile to spew. Alex in NYC to thread?

― joseph cotten (joseph cotten), Wednesday, 29 June 2005 03:07 (nineteen years ago)

well...you guys really shit on my parade. you broke my soul, not my heart (that's filled with piss). I blame myself. Sorry.

― Michael Costello (MichaelCostello1), Wednesday, 29 June 2005 03:08 (nineteen years ago)

end post.

― Michael Costello (MichaelCostello1), Wednesday, 29 June 2005 03:09 (nineteen years ago)

Hurting, you forgot something really important. The kid needs to make tons of real life friends who will go watch him play the same lame songs over and over at his shows. I have several friends approaching their 40s in their 4th serious band, waiting tables and still sending me biweekly emails hoping I'll come see them play at the Continental or some place in Brooklyn. Forget about it— it ain't happening. I wouldn't watch Josh Homme play that many shows. Okay, that's a lie. I probably would. But, the point is that it's really fucking hard to get a "buzz" going about your band unless you are amazingly different like the Pixies were or play to a bunch of teenage lunkheads like the punk/hardcore generation (which is DEAD, not just exploited). There is no scene that is happening now except dance stuff, so this kid really needs to become a DJ.

― Stoner Guy, Wednesday, 29 June 2005 03:10 (nineteen years ago)

I listened to one of the demos...it was boring.

― Rock Hardy (Rock Hardy), Wednesday, 29 June 2005 03:10 (nineteen years ago)

sorry about that rock, i'll trash them later.

― Michael Costello (MichaelCostello1), Wednesday, 29 June 2005 03:12 (nineteen years ago)

Stoner, I know this is unlikely, but if you know me when I'm 40, and I'm doing that, please show me a copy of that post so I will suddenly have a flash of clarity and quit my band.

― Hurting (Hurting), Wednesday, 29 June 2005 03:14 (nineteen years ago)

do you have a website Hurting? for you band. I wanna check it out?

― Michael Costello (MichaelCostello1), Wednesday, 29 June 2005 03:15 (nineteen years ago)

If you're serious about it, Mr. Telephone Poles, just keep at it. Don't be a quitter. Develop an ear by noting the differences between stuff you like and the stuff you record and then try to make the stuff you record sound more like the stuff you like.

― Stoner Guy, Wednesday, 29 June 2005 03:15 (nineteen years ago)

No that's ok. You guys fucked up my future.

― Michael Costello (MichaelCostello1), Wednesday, 29 June 2005 03:16 (nineteen years ago)

Hahaha...game, set, match.

― Rock Hardy (Rock Hardy), Wednesday, 29 June 2005 03:19 (nineteen years ago)

My band should be in your MySpace request folder now, Costello.

Seriously, I'm not saying your music has no potential, but in all likelihood even gaining the kind of indie success you seem to want will be difficult -- I mean it is for anyone, regardless of talent. Sure, there are guys that made it as four-track cult heroes, but chances are they hustled, and/or they had some well-connected friends.

― Hurting (Hurting), Wednesday, 29 June 2005 03:20 (nineteen years ago)

Well I'm trying to make some "Well Connected" friends now but it looks like people are spitting at one i'm making.

I guess people think I just post on here, but I sent out 40 demos in the past 2 months to various indy labels. I sent out 5 demos to Saddle Creek (for my other Solo Acoustic/Experimental songs) in the past 2 years. I try hard.

― Michael Costello (MichaelCostello1), Wednesday, 29 June 2005 03:24 (nineteen years ago)

Hurting, come on man, he's fucking with you! Now he's gone into a "thank you kind sir, I'll just go die in that corner if you don't mind" mode. It's actually entertaining. More so than his songs, at least!

― joseph cotten (joseph cotten), Wednesday, 29 June 2005 03:26 (nineteen years ago)

thank god st louis has www.stlpunk.com so these people can vent through a proper source rather than like this...

― jonathan - stl (jonathan - stl), Wednesday, 29 June 2005 03:26 (nineteen years ago)

-- joseph cotten (josephcotte...), June 29th, 2005.

Ha, I know, but at heart I'm still a desperate musician myself.

― Hurting (Hurting), Wednesday, 29 June 2005 03:31 (nineteen years ago)

I am the Nightrider! I am a fuel-injected suicide machine! I am a rocker! I am a roller! I am an out-of-controller! I am the Chosen One! The mighty hand of Vengeance! Sent down to strike the unroadworthy! I'm hotter than a rolling dice! Step right up, chum, and watch the kid lay down a rubber road right to freedom!

Don't take the bait! RISE!!!!!

― VegemiteGrrl (VegemiteGrrl), Wednesday, 29 June 2005 03:39 (nineteen years ago)

Sorry. I've been dying to use that quote somewhere on here for the past 6 months.

― VegemiteGrrl (VegemiteGrrl), Wednesday, 29 June 2005 03:39 (nineteen years ago)

What the hell are you guys talking about? Seacrest Out!

― Michael Costello (MichaelCostello1), Wednesday, 29 June 2005 03:40 (nineteen years ago)

listen now to what i say: just get an electric guitar, then take some time and learn how to play. and with your hair combed right and your pants fit tight, it's gonna be all right. then it's time to go downtown...

― fact checking cuz (fcc), Wednesday, 29 June 2005 03:43 (nineteen years ago)

They're talking about promotional work. PR. About licking the shit off the floor.

― Stoner Guy, Wednesday, 29 June 2005 03:43 (nineteen years ago)

I can't believe everybody here is so tolerant to this dude's spam.

― Mickey (modestmickey), Wednesday, 29 June 2005 03:47 (nineteen years ago)

Ned let him have it right off the bat!

― Stoner Guy, Wednesday, 29 June 2005 03:48 (nineteen years ago)

mickey: actually, we're just bored and we have insomnia.

― fact checking cuz (fcc), Wednesday, 29 June 2005 03:48 (nineteen years ago)

me too and I want more fun threads to refresh than this one :/

― Mickey (modestmickey), Wednesday, 29 June 2005 03:50 (nineteen years ago)

I think he could learn a thing or two from these guys:

http://www.eyeballskeleton.com/main.html

― Hurting (Hurting), Wednesday, 29 June 2005 03:50 (nineteen years ago)

This thread is classic.

― Orbit (Orbit), Wednesday, 29 June 2005 03:51 (nineteen years ago)

My attempt about this thread to get over 100. Keep Doing It. wait I'll convince you guys right now.

...You're All Jealous of My Band and How Much It Amazes You!

― Michael Costello (MichaelCostello1), Wednesday, 29 June 2005 03:53 (nineteen years ago)

My attempt about this thread to get over 100.

All your bases are belong to us?

― Hurting (Hurting), Wednesday, 29 June 2005 03:56 (nineteen years ago)

that's from that game, isn't it?

― Michael Costello (MichaelCostello1), Wednesday, 29 June 2005 03:58 (nineteen years ago)

If you want to get this thread over 100 posts, I don't mind helping you. If being the butt of ILM jokes didn't get Marissa Marchant a record deal, I doubt it's going to do much for you.

― Hurting (Hurting), Wednesday, 29 June 2005 03:59 (nineteen years ago)

I don't mean to be a Butt, but who's Marissa Marchant?

― Michael Costello (MichaelCostello1), Wednesday, 29 June 2005 04:01 (nineteen years ago)

Oh, Stoner Guy this is BEYOND CLASSIC!!!!

― Orbit (Orbit), Wednesday, 29 June 2005 04:03 (nineteen years ago)

http://www.marissamarchant.com/
HELP ME I AM ADDICTED TO MARISSA MARCHANT
Marissa Marchant, are you all right?

― Hurting (Hurting), Wednesday, 29 June 2005 04:04 (nineteen years ago)

Yeah, You guys are really getting your emotions out on this thread. I think I cracked into your minds.

― Michael Costello (MichaelCostello1), Wednesday, 29 June 2005 04:05 (nineteen years ago)

after all the hubbub, i just had to check out the tracks. it's amazing how you actually made it sound like you ARE playing all of the instruments at the same time.

― ken taylrr (ken taylrr), Wednesday, 29 June 2005 04:06 (nineteen years ago)

ROFLMAO!!!!

― Hurting (Hurting), Wednesday, 29 June 2005 04:06 (nineteen years ago)

well I wanted to get that feel. If I made an actual record, I would want it recorded that way.

― Michael Costello (MichaelCostello1), Wednesday, 29 June 2005 04:07 (nineteen years ago)

xxpost - like Dick Van Dyke in Mary Poppins?

Michael Costello is the antichrist.

― VegemiteGrrl (VegemiteGrrl), Wednesday, 29 June 2005 04:07 (nineteen years ago)

You should consider changing your last name to McManus.

-- joseph cotten (josephcotte...), June 29th, 2005.

hahahahaha

― ken taylrr (ken taylrr), Wednesday, 29 June 2005 04:08 (nineteen years ago)

Do I suck that bad? I suck worse than Marylin Manson?

― Michael Costello (MichaelCostello1), Wednesday, 29 June 2005 04:09 (nineteen years ago)

it says McManus.

― ken taylrr (ken taylrr), Wednesday, 29 June 2005 04:09 (nineteen years ago)

no, VAGemite said I'm the Antichrist

― Michael Costello (MichaelCostello1), Wednesday, 29 June 2005 04:10 (nineteen years ago)

Good one.

― Hurting (Hurting), Wednesday, 29 June 2005 04:11 (nineteen years ago)

ah.. sorry. gotcha now.

― ken taylrr (ken taylrr), Wednesday, 29 June 2005 04:11 (nineteen years ago)

That was a typo.

I am the antichrist you little pissant.

― VegemiteGrrl (VegemiteGrrl), Wednesday, 29 June 2005 04:12 (nineteen years ago)

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!100!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Thanks for everyone who Participated (I'm Sure I Spelt that Wrong).

I Thank You Too

― Michael Costello (MichaelCostello1), Wednesday, 29 June 2005 04:16 (nineteen years ago)

Congrats, you're only 100 more posts away from not getting any better at playing music.

― Hurting (Hurting), Wednesday, 29 June 2005 04:18 (nineteen years ago)

Stay on here long enough and he'll stop altogether. Which in itself has its good and bad points.

― VegemiteGrrl (VegemiteGrrl), Wednesday, 29 June 2005 04:20 (nineteen years ago)

I guess, VAG.

― Michael Costello (MichaelCostello1), Wednesday, 29 June 2005 04:21 (nineteen years ago)

Jesus, he takes a beating like Jake La Motta though.

― Hurting (Hurting), Wednesday, 29 June 2005 04:21 (nineteen years ago)

You guys are dicks. This dude's demo is 100000x better than the bands I saw tonight.

fuck you to hell boring liberal arts internet losers (HURTING)

― THE JAMES DEAN OF THE OLD TESTAMENT (ex machina), Wednesday, 29 June 2005 04:22 (nineteen years ago)

yeh, I don't get very hurt from word often. I know this forum is for Sophisticated Robot Rock music. Telephone Poles will never be Radiohead or Falco. It's just my little fun rock band. I guess you guys forgot about having fun with your band.

― Michael Costello (MichaelCostello1), Wednesday, 29 June 2005 04:25 (nineteen years ago)

Who did you see The James Dean of the Old Testament?

― Michael Costello (MichaelCostello1), Wednesday, 29 June 2005 04:25 (nineteen years ago)

Mike, I wasn't going to give you my full, honest opinion of your music, but since you're really being a douche, the problem with it is not merely that it's awful, but that it's not uniquely awful, whereas you seem to be convinced that it is at least unique. You seem to believe that you, yourself, invented the following:

1) Lo-fi recording
2) Deliberately sloppy playing to mask an actual lack of skill
3) Self-promotion by sheer gall combined with faux-naivete

You did not.

― Hurting (Hurting), Wednesday, 29 June 2005 04:26 (nineteen years ago)

Hurting, seriously -- you don't need to read this thread. Eat a dick you boring dullard.

― THE JAMES DEAN OF THE OLD TESTAMENT (ex machina), Wednesday, 29 June 2005 04:29 (nineteen years ago)

hey James, No name calling in here, except VAGemite. Her name is just asking for it.

― Michael Costello (MichaelCostello1), Wednesday, 29 June 2005 04:30 (nineteen years ago)

Who was the James Dean of the Old Testament? Moses?

― Stoner Guy, Wednesday, 29 June 2005 04:31 (nineteen years ago)

MOSES says I'm good? Cool!

― Michael Costello (MichaelCostello1), Wednesday, 29 June 2005 04:32 (nineteen years ago)

You're stereotyping yourself right before my very eyes, without any help at all, Michael. I kiss you.

― VegemiteGrrl (VegemiteGrrl), Wednesday, 29 June 2005 04:32 (nineteen years ago)

No, it was totally Cain.

― Hurting (Hurting), Wednesday, 29 June 2005 04:32 (nineteen years ago)

so I'm still pretty new here. what does it actually take to get banned on ILM?

― Mickey (modestmickey), Wednesday, 29 June 2005 04:32 (nineteen years ago)

Rape i guess

― Michael Costello (MichaelCostello1), Wednesday, 29 June 2005 04:34 (nineteen years ago)

If we have to rape you to get you off of this board, then so be it.

― Hurting (Hurting), Wednesday, 29 June 2005 04:34 (nineteen years ago)

Who was the James Dean of the Old Testament?

ISHMAEL

― THE JAMES DEAN OF THE OLD TESTAMENT (ex machina), Wednesday, 29 June 2005 04:35 (nineteen years ago)

No, it was totally Cain.

Cain fill James Dean-size shoes? I don't think he was Abel. Ahahahahah!

― Stoner Guy, Wednesday, 29 June 2005 04:35 (nineteen years ago)

huh?

― VegemiteGrrl (VegemiteGrrl), Wednesday, 29 June 2005 04:36 (nineteen years ago)

You'd rape me? well it wouldn't be bad now since I turned 18 and I wouldn't be a minor. you guys would probably get a smaller sentence

― Michael Costello (MichaelCostello1), Wednesday, 29 June 2005 04:36 (nineteen years ago)

able? get it?

― Stoner Guy, Wednesday, 29 June 2005 04:36 (nineteen years ago)

Not Really, Stoner. explain it.

― Michael Costello (MichaelCostello1), Wednesday, 29 June 2005 04:37 (nineteen years ago)

I picture Judas rocking the James Dean 'tude myself.

― VegemiteGrrl (VegemiteGrrl), Wednesday, 29 June 2005 04:37 (nineteen years ago)

No, it's Cain, cuz he killed Abel without a cause!

― Hurting (Hurting), Wednesday, 29 June 2005 04:38 (nineteen years ago)

I got it Stoner, I got caught in an xpost with the weird comment further upthread. Hence my 'huh?'.

― VegemiteGrrl (VegemiteGrrl), Wednesday, 29 June 2005 04:39 (nineteen years ago)

Cain was not Abel. And Cain was not able to fill James Dean-size shoes. In other words, he is not his brother and also he does not fit the bill as "the James Dean of the Old Testament." Sheez.

― Napolean Dyn-o-mite, Wednesday, 29 June 2005 04:39 (nineteen years ago)

Ah, the threads of 2am.

― Hurting (Hurting), Wednesday, 29 June 2005 04:40 (nineteen years ago)

It's only 10pm here, still some lucidity left.

― VegemiteGrrl (VegemiteGrrl), Wednesday, 29 June 2005 04:40 (nineteen years ago)

what about Kain though?

― Michael Costello (MichaelCostello1), Wednesday, 29 June 2005 04:41 (nineteen years ago)

after all the hubbub, i just had to check out the tracks. it's amazing how you actually made it sound like you ARE playing all of the instruments at the same time.

-- ken taylrr (or...), June 29th, 2005.

Seriously though, it was all worth it, because this is one of the funniest posts ever.

― Hurting (Hurting), Wednesday, 29 June 2005 04:42 (nineteen years ago)

See, Hurting. Have fun a little. don't be a dousche.

― Michael Costello (MichaelCostello1), Wednesday, 29 June 2005 04:45 (nineteen years ago)

I picture Judas rocking the James Dean 'tude myself.
-- VegemiteGrrl (sharonjo...) (webmail), June 29th, 2005 1:37 AM. (VegemiteGrrl) (later) (link)

OLD TESTAMENT

― THE JAMES DEAN OF THE OLD TESTAMENT (ex machina), Wednesday, 29 June 2005 04:46 (nineteen years ago)

James, who did you see?

― Michael Costello (MichaelCostello1), Wednesday, 29 June 2005 04:46 (nineteen years ago)

VegemiteGirl is the dullest person on ILX. Even Dave Matthews fans are more fun.

― THE JAMES DEAN OF THE OLD TESTAMENT (ex machina), Wednesday, 29 June 2005 04:47 (nineteen years ago)

T/S - this guy or the one who insisted that VCN sounds like Phish?

― Mickey (modestmickey), Wednesday, 29 June 2005 04:47 (nineteen years ago)

who's VCN? I hate Phish!

― Michael Costello (MichaelCostello1), Wednesday, 29 June 2005 04:48 (nineteen years ago)

OLD TESTAMENT

Old Testament? You mean like "The New Order"?

― Stoner Guy, Wednesday, 29 June 2005 04:48 (nineteen years ago)

See, Hurting. Have fun a little. don't be a dousche.

-- Michael Costello (M_Co_8...), June 29th, 2005.

Oh, believe me, I am having fun.

― Hurting (Hurting), Wednesday, 29 June 2005 04:50 (nineteen years ago)

I'm not dull, Ishmael, just stupid. I'm sure you know the difference.

― VegemiteGrrl (VegemiteGrrl), Wednesday, 29 June 2005 04:50 (nineteen years ago)

Stupid? Because you don't know the difference between the Old and New Testament? Hardly. Phish does sound a lot like Boredoms VCN, though.

― Stoner Guy, Wednesday, 29 June 2005 04:52 (nineteen years ago)

No stupid because I *do* know the difference. [grins sheepishly]

― VegemiteGrrl (VegemiteGrrl), Wednesday, 29 June 2005 04:53 (nineteen years ago)

Do not ask for whom the shill trolls

― Hurting (Hurting), Wednesday, 29 June 2005 04:53 (nineteen years ago)

I had a chance to get a piano that the keyboardist from PHISH grew up playing on. It was free but it was too heavy so I left it.

― Michael Costello (MichaelCostello1), Wednesday, 29 June 2005 04:54 (nineteen years ago)

http://www.ravenmetal.com/images/tno.jpg

― Stoner Guy, Wednesday, 29 June 2005 04:54 (nineteen years ago)

Phish does sound a lot like Boredoms VCN, though.

no.

― THE JAMES DEAN OF THE OLD TESTAMENT (ex machina), Wednesday, 29 June 2005 04:55 (nineteen years ago)

I didn't know there was a New Testament coming out though.

― Hurting (Hurting), Wednesday, 29 June 2005 04:55 (nineteen years ago)

Is this guy a Noize dude or just a friend of Costello's?

― Hurting (Hurting), Wednesday, 29 June 2005 04:56 (nineteen years ago)

http://images.amazon.com/images/P/B000002IKR.01._PE8_SCMZZZZZZZ_.jpg

― VegemiteGrrl (VegemiteGrrl), Wednesday, 29 June 2005 04:57 (nineteen years ago)

I've put them through the new hit analyzing music software and they both came out 22% chance of being a hit, which means they sound exactly the same. And now it's time to...
http://www.earachestore.com/store/media/SleepsHolyMountainCD.jpg

― Stoner Guy, Wednesday, 29 June 2005 04:58 (nineteen years ago)

Shrug. Maybe neither? Just your friendly neighborhood agitator.

― VegemiteGrrl (VegemiteGrrl), Wednesday, 29 June 2005 04:58 (nineteen years ago)

mm.

sleeeep.

― VegemiteGrrl (VegemiteGrrl), Wednesday, 29 June 2005 04:59 (nineteen years ago)

You know, you can set yer preferences so you can see my login name all the time

― THE JAMES DEAN OF THE OLD TESTAMENT (ex machina), Wednesday, 29 June 2005 05:04 (nineteen years ago)

I even like Phish (sometimes)

― THE JAMES DEAN OF THE OLD TESTAMENT (ex machina), Wednesday, 29 June 2005 05:04 (nineteen years ago)

You took my dream and raped it. Thanks for Raping my dream, Simon Cowell.

The #2 post of the thread belongs to the man himself.

Damn, this kid really reminds me of a particular movie character who talked like that. Am I imagining it? Is it some sort of amalgam of Max Fisher and Igby?

― joseph cotten (joseph cotten), Wednesday, 29 June 2005 05:05 (nineteen years ago)

This isn't funny anymore. those Testament things brang it down a lot. I'm Out!

― Michael Costello (MichaelCostello1), Wednesday, 29 June 2005 05:12 (nineteen years ago)

this guy's music sucks.

― Beetlebum (MichaelCostello1), Wednesday, 29 June 2005 06:53 (nineteen years ago)

Yeah, but he's some kind of savant on the board.

― Bobby Peru (Bobby Peru), Wednesday, 29 June 2005 07:18 (nineteen years ago)

The only way you can tell (ok, one way) if your stuff is good enough.

1) Put a record on your turntable
2) Start up the turntable, put the needle to the record
3) Switch the hi-fi to the cassette player or whatever has your demo on it
4) Imagine that record is your track playing.

If you can do that and say "Yep, that's possible" then off you go.

― mark grout (mark grout), Wednesday, 29 June 2005 07:35 (nineteen years ago)

386 people have listened to the first track, but only 56 have made it as far as Hot Latte. That's got to tell you something.

I think the Telephones Poles are the future.

― Dr. C (Dr. C), Wednesday, 29 June 2005 07:55 (nineteen years ago)

This thread is a trainwreck.

First thing you do, you stop plugging your band on ILM. You have to realize what enormous feat of restraint it takes for dozens of the board's regulars not to do the same.
-- joseph cotten (josephcotte...), June 28th, 2005.

This is OTM. Everytime I record a new track I'm pleased with I want to post it on ILM but I hold off because it's a selfish endeavour at the moment. Infact, I think we made a general 'Post MP3s' of your band thread at somepoint but it's fallen off.

What Michael is doing in here isn't sharing music because he thinks ILM would like it but exploiting the people who are involved in the music industry here in some form or another. And expecting people to care.

Oh and Michael, your little rock band is about as fun as being torn from a whirlygig by a 7 foot penis and then stomped 3 feet deep into the ground by a giant bible while at the same time being forced to listen to Damien Rice in surround sound. Give it up.

― Hari A$hur$t (Toaster), Wednesday, 29 June 2005 09:49 (nineteen years ago)

I know this forum is for Sophisticated Robot Rock music.

This statement is amazing.

Everyone in this thread gets exactly what they deserve. Justice.

― Reggie, Wednesday, 29 June 2005 13:00 (nineteen years ago)

Deerhoof and Xiu Xiu kick face!

I actually like Xiu Xiu, too, but I can't think of anyone else who would've signed them at all. Maybe Kranky or Emperor Norton. Maybe.

― Ian Riese-Moraine has been xeroxed into a conduit! (Eastern Mantra), Wednesday, 29 June 2005 14:13 (nineteen years ago)

Why are you guys being such dicks to this man? Your music sucks too.

― THE JAMES DEAN OF THE OLD TESTAMENT (ex machina), Wednesday, 29 June 2005 14:26 (nineteen years ago)

The thing is, I actually HAVE plugged my band a couple times on ILM, which is one of the reasons I actually tried to be nice to this guy at first. Of course, all I did was make a thread mentioning that I have a show, not bomb other threads with links to my site.

― Hurting (Hurting), Wednesday, 29 June 2005 14:35 (nineteen years ago)

WHY MUST TELEPHONE POLES BE GETTIN SO MUCH 'TENTION WHILST FRUIT OF FOREST LINGERS IN OBSCURITY?!?!?!?!

― Eppy (Eppy), Wednesday, 29 June 2005 14:38 (nineteen years ago)

Why are you guys being such dicks to this man?

Because you showed us how much fun it could be, Jon, duh! How many times have you wrapped it all up with "be cool, just a bit of fun"...?

― Rock Hardy (Rock Hardy), Wednesday, 29 June 2005 14:39 (nineteen years ago)

That's not my line, persay.

― THE JAMES DEAN OF THE OLD TESTAMENT (ex machina), Wednesday, 29 June 2005 14:45 (nineteen years ago)

Dude, all the hair-splitting leads to male-pattern baldness.

― Rock Hardy (Rock Hardy), Wednesday, 29 June 2005 14:48 (nineteen years ago)

I claim the line. (I did not wrap anything up with it though)

― mark grout (mark grout), Wednesday, 29 June 2005 14:48 (nineteen years ago)

Why are you guys being such dicks to this man? Your music sucks too.
I'm not and I've never heard a negative complaint about my music (just a neutral one from someone who listens mostly to Top 40).

― Ian Riese-Moraine has been xeroxed into a conduit! (Eastern Mantra), Wednesday, 29 June 2005 14:52 (nineteen years ago)

Maybe you ought to plug harder.

― THE JAMES DEAN OF THE OLD TESTAMENT (ex machina), Wednesday, 29 June 2005 15:02 (nineteen years ago)

LINES FORM ON MY FACE N' HANDS
LINES FORM FROM THE UPS N' DOWNS
I'M IN THE MIDDLE WITHOUT ANY PLANS
I'M A BOY AND I'M A MAN

I'M EIGHTEEN AND I DON'T NO WHAT I WANT
EIGHTEEN I JUST DON'T NO WHAT I WANT
EIGHTEEN I GOTTA GET AWAY
I'VE GOTTA GET OUTTA THIS PLACE
I'LL GO RUNNING IN OUTER SPACE AGAIN

I'VE GOTTA BABY'S BRAIN AND AN OLD MANS HEART
TOOK EIGHTEEN YEARS TO GET THIS FAR
DON'T ALWAYS NO WHAT I'M TALKING ABOUT
FEEL LIKE I'M LIVING IN THE MIDDLE OF DOUBT

‘CAUSE I'M EIGHTEEN I GET CONFUSED EVERY DAY
EIGHTEEN I JUST DON'T NO WHAT TO SAY
EIGHTEEN I GOTTA GET AWAY

OH LINES FORM ON MY FACE N' MY HANDS
LINES FORM ON THE LEFT AND RIGHT
I'M IN THE MIDDLE THE MIDDLE OF LIFE
I'M A BOY AND I'M A MAN I'M EIGHTEEN AND I LIKE IT

― Cichael Mostello, Wednesday, 29 June 2005 15:19 (nineteen years ago)

I know this forum is for Sophisticated Robot Rock music. Telephone Poles will never be Radiohead or Falco.

― Curt1s St3ph3ns, Wednesday, 29 June 2005 16:03 (nineteen years ago)

Man, you guys so bought into my plan.

Even if you guys Do or Don't like T Poles, well now you know about it and you listened to my songs. No I got some publicity.

You know the saying: All publicity is good publicity.

P.S. Hari A$hur$t, Why do you whirl off of 7 ft. penises?

― Michael Costello (MichaelCostello1), Wednesday, 29 June 2005 18:21 (nineteen years ago)

yes, you've obviously got us all on your side now.

― ken taylrr (ken taylrr), Wednesday, 29 June 2005 18:23 (nineteen years ago)

Yeah, I'm like Darth Vadar.

― Michael Costello (MichaelCostello1), Wednesday, 29 June 2005 18:26 (nineteen years ago)

Except your a child who makes bad music.

― I never even listened to your music, Wednesday, 29 June 2005 18:30 (nineteen years ago)

hell yeah.

― Michael Costello (MichaelCostello1), Wednesday, 29 June 2005 18:32 (nineteen years ago)

why don't you borrow money from dad?

― Another Allnighter (sexyDancer), Wednesday, 29 June 2005 18:32 (nineteen years ago)

Everyone has been behind the starting of a band at one point, so let's make sympathy the "song" we are all singing to Michael, first of all. Secondly, I am liking several aspects of what he's doing, and especially the promotional push.

He is gaining new fans right now, in addition to the 40 from Soulseek, in addition to his family and probably some of his friends. Which, if ideas can really spread like Malcolm Gladwell documents in The Tipping Point (like wildfire!), maybe we are the naysayers who will be eating our words.

Ask yourself first: 1) Would I ever haved named my band the Telephones Poles and built a crap site like that?

Probalby at some age, yes.

2) Have I made big improvements in my music, and could I have changed my band name from the Telephone Poles, incorporating tighter arrangements?

Yes, but it takes a little time.

So Michael Costello, you are well on your way to something and you can sign me up as your "fan", especially in a few years from now.

Gabe

P.S. Check out my band "The Replacements" -- touring Eastern Europe and East Coast US in September '05.

― Gabe Tonkin (Rob Uptight), Wednesday, 29 June 2005 18:34 (nineteen years ago)

Please listen to my demo.

― Parrish, Wednesday, 29 June 2005 19:08 (nineteen years ago)

Gabe, I mentioned this on the promote your band thread after your post, but in case you didn't see it...I think you might have some logistical problems with calling your band "The Replacements".

Rumor has it that it might already have been used by some obscure band from Minnesota...

Seriously, unless you have a new hobby that entails collecting "cease and desist" orders, you need to modify the name.

― John Justen (johnjusten), Wednesday, 29 June 2005 19:19 (nineteen years ago)

John,

I appreciate you looking out for me, and of course this is one of a couple names we are kicking around.

But one thing is definite -- a new song I am writing called "Cease and Exist"!!!

― Gabe Tonkin (Rob Uptight), Wednesday, 29 June 2005 19:24 (nineteen years ago)

hey aire'body!

I tricked you into listening to my demo. It doesn't matter that you think it sucks or that I'm annoying - I tricked you! I win!!

ps - i know your sayin 'basement rock' was done before cause yer just jellus..but I have a question? What does 'basement' mean? I record in mine, so it, like, fits..right?

― cicatrix, Wednesday, 29 June 2005 19:25 (nineteen years ago)

Cicatrix,

I think I have my problems too, but slathering the world in SARCASM is not one of them thank god. and MOCKERY, there's no need. Let the Telephone Poles exist, because even if basement rock isn't theirs, "their basement rock" is all their own.

― Gabe Tonkin (Rob Uptight), Wednesday, 29 June 2005 19:32 (nineteen years ago)

Dear gabe,

I have many more problems besides the ones you kindly pointed out... the inability to resist easy targets being the worst. Thankfully, I stopped being PAINFULLY EARNEST around the time I stopped crying in my bedroom, listening to the Cure.

― cicatrix, Wednesday, 29 June 2005 19:46 (nineteen years ago)

P.S. Hari A$hur$t, Why do you whirl off of 7 ft. penises?

-- Michael Costello (M_Co_8...), June 29th, 2005.

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v720/DeadWolfBones2/holyloltom.jpg

YOUR MUSIC SUCKS DUDE, DIANECTICS ROX

― Hari A$hur$t (Toaster), Wednesday, 29 June 2005 20:18 (nineteen years ago)

On a related note, does ILM have a thread where we link our own music?

― Naive Teen Idol (Naive Teen Idol), Wednesday, 29 June 2005 21:07 (nineteen years ago)

this thread blows.

― That One Guy (That One Guy), Wednesday, 29 June 2005 21:11 (nineteen years ago)

On a related note, does ILM have a thread where we link our own music?

-- Naive Teen Idol (matthew.weine...), June 29th, 2005.

I know I made one that lasted a while but it would be naive of me to think that was the first.

― Hari A$hur$t (Toaster), Wednesday, 29 June 2005 21:23 (nineteen years ago)

link?

― Naive Teen Idol (Naive Teen Idol), Wednesday, 29 June 2005 21:24 (nineteen years ago)

I cannot find it in a search for the life of me. I have terrible memory and can't remember what i called the thread or what song i posted. Maybe it's time for a definitive new one?

― Hari A$hur$t (Toaster), Wednesday, 29 June 2005 21:29 (nineteen years ago)

This might be it.

― cicatrix, Wednesday, 29 June 2005 21:29 (nineteen years ago)

This is one.

― cicatrix, Wednesday, 29 June 2005 21:30 (nineteen years ago)

crap - sorry, it's the same link - damn error messages!!!

― cicatrix, Wednesday, 29 June 2005 21:31 (nineteen years ago)

that one looks good to me.

― Hari A$hur$t (Toaster), Wednesday, 29 June 2005 21:33 (nineteen years ago)

The thing is, Costello actually DID do a good job of getting people to listen to his demo. The problem is, it was a wasted effort. He should have spent more time getting his shit together before he stuck his neck out. Seriously.

― Hurting (Hurting), Wednesday, 29 June 2005 21:56 (nineteen years ago)

I lied when i said i'd listened to his demo; I just assumed it was bad.

Last laugh A$hur$t.

― Hari A$hur$t (Toaster), Wednesday, 29 June 2005 22:02 (nineteen years ago)

200!

― PappaWheelie (PappaWheelie), Wednesday, 29 June 2005 22:05 (nineteen years ago)

two years pass...

wow, this thread is amazing.

― Creeztophair, Monday, 24 March 2008 06:12 (seventeen years ago)

best part:
This isn't funny anymore. those Testament things brang it down a lot. I'm Out!
-- Michael Costello (MichaelCostello1), Wednesday, 29 June 2005 05:12 (2 years ago) Link

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

this guy's music sucks.
-- Beetlebum (MichaelCostello1), Wednesday, 29 June 2005 06:53 (2 years ago) Link

― mizzell, Tuesday, 25 March 2008 16:31 (seventeen years ago)

do people still use geocities and live with all those nasty popup adverts in 2008 ?

― mark e, Tuesday, 25 March 2008 16:45 (seventeen years ago)

Wonder if he ever got 2 b teh famous.

― Mark G, Tuesday, 25 March 2008 16:45 (seventeen years ago)

wow ILX used to be snarky.

― Thomas, Tuesday, 25 March 2008 17:03 (seventeen years ago)

no, he isn't famous. i'm his brother...
now he makes dfa type dance music with a keyboard. i'd link you to his current myspace, but i don't know it.

― Creeztophair, Tuesday, 25 March 2008 18:18 (seventeen years ago)

He Ain't Famous, He's My Brother

― St3ve Go1db3rg, Tuesday, 25 March 2008 18:39 (seventeen years ago)

wow ILX used to be snarky.

-- Thomas, Tuesday, March 25, 2008 5:03 PM (1 hour ago) Bookmark Link

yeah HOW THINGS HAVE CHANGED!11!!!

― banriquit, Tuesday, 25 March 2008 18:40 (seventeen years ago)

You must be logged in to post. Please either login here, or if you are not registered, you may register here.