2006 Dumbass-A-Go-Go Thread

I can't wait to hear WSCR's "Who You Crappin' " show today to hear what people are saying about the blizzard of Ozz.

According to researchers, the best estimate is 1.8 < LF < 2.1

"To me, April games count."

Krukster: Of course Jimmy Rollins' 56-game hit-streak record counts if it continues into this season! I don't care if it's done in one season, two seasons or THREE seasons!

Me: ...

And yeah, Olney's been calling the steroid hunt bullshit for a week or two now. Maybe longer, but I don't pay much attention to him.

Last year the Yankees Bullpen got mixed results. Besides Mariano Rivera, the bullpen had a lot of question marks coming into this season. So the Yankees made some moves and only time will tell how they pan out. Here is hte 2006 Yankees bullpen:

Starting with the closer as the most important bullpen position, the Yanks have old reliable and the best closer in baseball, Mariano Rivera. Rivera had his best season as a Yankee most analysts will say posted an unheard of ERA nearing 1. He had 40+ saves like he has every year and at times seemed to be unhittable. HE quietly had one of his best seasons ever. This year, his production will continue as the Yankees lineup will generate more save opportunities for Rivera and for saves in his column.

The first big question mark is the setup man. Gone is Tom Gordon who was one of the best set up man in the game last year. He went to Philadelphia to be their closer. So they signed free agent Kyle Fransworth from the Braves who put up excellent numbers with the Braves last year. My only question is that can he put up the same numbers. I don't think so. Most braves pitchers do well because of Leo Mazzoni and Bobby Cox two of the best baseball men in the game. Like Jaret Wright, Farnsworth's numbers will decline. However I still think he can be a productive set up man.

Next is Tanyon Sturtze who has been pretty durable for the Yanks. He has filled in as a spot starter and has pitched nicely the past couple of years out of the bullpen. He does have some shaky games but most of the time he puts up good numbers.

Then there is Octavio Dotel Dotel was a great closer for the Astros a couple of years ago but on the A's he struggled and got injured for most of the year. I think that if he has a good year and stays healthy he can really regain his dominating self and fireball instinct he once had. Plus the Yanks aren't paying that much money so it is a gamble well worth taking.

Finally there is Chacon and Aaron Small coming out of the bullpen, tow men who were used as starters last year and put up good numbers. I don't know how much playing time they will receive depending on injuries to the pitching staff but they will put up good numbers.

The Yankees bullpen will definetly be better than last year. It is no longer a question mark like last year and for the most part these releivers will put up good numbers.

"I always tell Carlos he's a gringo anyway because he speaks such good English and is so articulate."
--Mets catcher Paul Lo Duca, on Delgado

NY Yankees 4, Tampa Bay 2, 10 innings

ST. PETERSBURG, Fla. (AP) -- With Alex Rodriguez struggling with runners in scoring position, the Tampa Bay Devil Rays took a calculated gamble against the New York Yankees slugger -- and lost.

Rodriguez snapped an 0-for-12 skid with a RBI single in the 10th inning, helping the Yankees finish a 4-2 comeback victory over the Devil Rays, who elected to pitch to the two-time American League MVP with first base open and runners at second and third.

The reason?

Hideki Matsui was on deck.

"Matsui, to me, is one of the best clutch hitters in all of baseball, so I prefer not pitching to him. You take your chances right there on A-Rod," Devil Rays manager Joe Maddon said.

Gozira's career clutch: -1.3
Princess' career clutch: -0.7

Both are slight chokers with Matsui being slightly more choketastic.

Derek "Clutch" Jeter has the 4th worst clutch rate of all active players at -10.9.

I dunno if this is pure dumbassery, a lame attempt to establish one's credentials as a man of the people, or just a classic thin premise for a column, but Shaughnessy's already in rare form this year.

Tuesday at Fenway, ownership blundered by failing to make an early postponement of the scheduled game against the Yankees. It was obvious to every human in New England that no baseball was going to be played that night, but the $ox failed to call it off, then opened the gates, announced a delay, and finally called the game at approximately 7:40 p.m. It was preposterous.

Why? Why did they wait? Why did they allow faithful fans to drive one or two hours to the ballpark (don't forget the jackknifed tractor-trailer on the Southeast Expressway that created a monstrous traffic jam), pay $30 or more to park, then sit in slop for an hour or two when it was obvious there would be no baseball? Was it to sell a few more hot dogs or cups of chowder? NESN pregame show ratings? More customers at RemDawg's?

The $ox had to have known they could not have played that night. If not, they should fire Bill James and bring on Mish Michaels or Don Kent.

Was it really about the money? Did the $ox open the gates just to unload some concession items?

''That's a cheap shot at our integrity," said owner John Henry. ''We're not going to make our fans suffer just to sell hot dogs. In 2002, we canceled a game at 9:30 in the morning and then the sun came out. It's very hard to predict the weather in Boston. If we knew we weren't going to play, we wouldn't have sent [Josh] Beckett down to get warm. We heard it was going to be misty. It really didn't start raining until 10 after 8."

(Henry and Co. should have checked with any local dairy farmer. Take it from one who grew up in Groton, everybody knows it's going to rain when the cows are lying down in the pasture, and the cattle were definitely horizontal Tuesday.)

There's exactly one salient point in that whole column (w/r/t the Globe/Red Sox ownership sitch), but it wasn't even raining in Boston when they opened the gates at 5:00! Dan Shaughnessy Watch's parting shot is pretty genius today.

i tuned that in just after i finished reading his treatise on intelligent design.

Maybe I'm biased. Let's get that out of the way right at the top of this offering. Maybe the small kindness extended to me by Joe Morgan back in 1975 when I was an impossibly youthful and inexperienced sportswriter has stuck all this time later.

Regardless, I think the man is the finest "expert analyst" working the TV sports beat. Baseball . . . football . . . basketball . . . doesn't matter. I submit that Morgan, the former second baseman for a lot of teams -- including the '75 Cincinnati Reds -- is the gold standard of color men.

He's insightful, he's knowledgeable, he's articulate and he can effortlessly blend today's game and athletes with those of yesterday without yearning for the one and/or pandering to the other.

I mention this here and now because I treated myself to virtually all of ESPN2's telecast of the Thursday-night affair between Houston and St. Louis, and to Morgan's words that accompanied it. As always, Joe was superb . . . especially when he commented about Andy Pettitte and his slider with these words: "If you think he's tough, you should have batted against Steve Carlton."

I don't know. For some reason that made me laugh. But then, Morgan -- the Hall-of-Famer, and one of baseball's true ambassadors -- was so sound in other ways. Why does Houston's insistence to bat Willy Taveras second behind the much slower Craig Biggio rather than leadoff make sense? Joe explained. Why won't pitchers throw inside more often? Joe explained. Why did the Astros' Lance Berkman look so good hitting his fourth-inning home run and so weak striking out a couple of innings later? Joe explained.

And then there was his dismissal of pitchers who suffer from a lack of run support. "Pitch better," Joe said. "It's simple: If the other guy gave up no runs, he out-pitched you."

Anyway, I believe that Joe Morgan is terrific at what he does behind the microphone. And my position has nothing to do with that rainout during the 1975 World Series between Morgan's Reds and the Boston Red Sox when, during a practice session at an indoor batting facility at Boston University (I think), Morgan motioned to a certain youthful scribe to join him inside the cage, where the conversation could be more private.

And, yes, I accepted his invitation . . . and I sat with Joe Morgan, just the two of us, apart from the masses . . . and I got a pretty good story out of it. In a career filled with some wonderful moments, I've never forgotten that one.

I loved the insinuation that Bill James should have developed a formula for predicting the weather. Cy Young Predictor, Rain Predictor, etc.

http://sports.yahoo.com/mlb/news;_ylt=AtLadahUVQObhvICzzNlGKARvLYF?slug=cnnsi-disturbingsigno&prov=cnnsi&type=lgns

http://www.baseballprospectus.com/article.php?articleid=5054

Are the Japanese in training camp longer than who? Longer than the guys playing in Fall leagues, Rookie Leagues or Carribean Leagues?

http://sports.yahoo.com/mlb/news?slug=jp-bonds050906&prov=yhoo&type=lgns

You pointed out that one player not on an MLB schedule did not seem to be adversely effected by playing in the WBC. I suggested that if he had been in training longer than MLB players, or if his season had ended earlier, or if Japanese pitchers have a different spring timing regimen (throwing off and on throughout the offseason, etc.) than MLB pitchers, these could all explain why Matsuzaka has shown no ill effects.

You responded by arguing that MLB pitchers could be on a similar schedule with the fall leagues (AFL - Arizona Fall League) or winter ball - except, as I noted, these wouldn't apply to most, if not all, of the MLB pitchers playing in the WBC.

I searched through the Bonds thread and the steroids thread and found nothing akin to a position, so how about either pointing me to it or just bothering to type it out?

1) I have no idea if Daisuke Matsuzaka trains longer in the offseason than the "average MLB player". I guess I was trying to figure out who exactly the "average MLB player" was.

2) The J-League season is fairly similar to MLB's. Spring Training begins in February and culminates in ~20 games against regional and international competition. Officially starts in April although only 146 games long. Playoffs are a week after the season ends, in October. So their season is about 10% shorter than the MLB season (but they take a full week off to play 3 all star games).

Matsuzaka's team did not make it to the playoffs (as they sucked).

3) Matsuzaka skipped much of Spring Training to train and compete with the WBC Team Japan. He mentioned that he tried to prepare for both the WBC and the J-League season in mind. Also, I don't think he pitched more than ~60 pitches in any of his WBC starts.

Jonah Keri interviewed by Rob Dibble and Chris Rose on The Best Damn SportsShow Period, Monday, May 15th at 10:30 pm local time.

http://ca.sports.yahoo.com/mlb/news;_ylt=AkyGL.6gFefhO4Tyocq0qI85nYcB?slug=jp-bonds051106&prov=yhoo&type=lgns

Is this guy so fresh out of ideas that he needs to write a column about Bonds on consecutive days? Is there nothing else to write about?

-- David R. (quoteidio...), May 12th, 2006.

http://sports.yahoo.com/mlb/news;_ylt=Au13ETGue_0iRYmbC3ByUKIRvLYF?slug=jp-barrybonds051206&prov=yhoo&type=lgns

This guy is such a fucking hack. Even if you think that Bonds did something wrong, this is just column after column of taking on the easiest target baseball has ever seen. It's the columnist equivalent to shooting fish in a barrel.

:(

"A panel of ESPN writers and broadcasters recently chose Roger Clemens as the greatest living pitcher, thus unleashing another blowtorch on reality. For regular-season excellence and longevity, absolutely, but clutch performances have to matter. If you want somebody to pitch a big game, you take Sandy Koufax, Bob Gibson, Whitey Ford, Jack Morris, Jim Palmer, Mickey Lolich and Dave Stewart (just for starters) over Clemens, who doesn’t even enter the argument..."

PS - MOD! :{ :{ ;_;

Passan wants to be the Jim Gray to Bonds' Pete Rose. OVER AND OVER AND OVER AND OVER AND OVER AGAIN, in writing.

Also, I would like to add Jayson Stark for calling the Cards '05 signing of Eckstein, the worst FA acquisition of that year.

Here's today's headline:

Power outage: Bonds, Pujols fizzle in showdown

A combined .429 OBP + .500 SLG = .929 OPS fizzle.

Didn't almost everyone think this at the time?

Half of them are named Bill Plaschke.

verducci goes after bonds, again.

even if these assholes aren't wrong, it's just such obvious, lowest-common denominator bullshit going after a guy who is hated by most people who follow baseball. stumped for an interesting take on a complex game? take aim at the easiest target in the world, yet again.

sportswriting must has more hacks-per-capita than any other profession.

http://sports.yahoo.com/mlb/news;_ylt=Ah5s_Ge7UILEQkcQErMEJFwRvLYF?slug=cnnsi-theirforreal&prov=cnnsi&type=lgns

OMGWTF:

Verlander is the kind of young impact pitcher that can make a good rotation into a playoff rotation, the way Kevin Millwood did for the 1998 Braves, Kerry Wood did for the 1998 Cubs and Rick Ankiel did for the 2000 Cardinals.

The Cubs were spanked by the Braves in 1998, the Mets rolled over the Cards in 2000 (partly thanks to Rick Ankiel turning into ... uh, Rick Ankiel), and the 1998 Braves had two, maybe three future HOF starters so it's probably safe to say that they already had a "playoff rotation" before Millwood got there.

So what's he saying -- the Tigers are good enough to squeak their way past the best of the AL's second tier teams and get their asses handed to them by the truly great teams?

Rafael Furcal changes the Dodgers' identity how? By hitting .266/.343/.343? Or maybe getting caught stealing 37 percent of the time? His numbers are very similar to Cesar Izturis' last year.
-- Mike, Portland

When I saw the Dodgers, they raved about his passion for the game. He's got Miguel Tejada-type enthusiasm. I agree that he hasn't played like a $13 million player, but I do believe he's given them an element of energy that can be contagious.

Congrats to Derek Jeter, who isn't most overrated, on hit No. 2,000. If anything, he's most underrated.

Late hits

Cubs catcher Michael Barrett got 10 games for popping A.J. Pierzynski, which Barrett deserved. But if you've met Pierzynski, you may think Barrett also deserves a medal.

There's a dispute over Kirby Puckett's ashes, and I keep waiting for Doug Mientkiewicz to make his claim.

I ask myself: How am I ever going to fill my Tuesday nights now that "Bonds on Bonds" is on hiatus?

Jon Heyman can be reached at jonhheyman@aol.com

Essentially: Young, farmed prospects are a bargain compared to older free agents.

I too agree that Barret deserved to suckerpunch AJ!

http://us.i1.yimg.com/us.yimg.com/i/us/sp/cn/headshots/scottpianowski2.jpg

http://i.a.cnn.net/si/.element/img/2.0/story/writers/new/topper_filice_inside-baseball.jpg

is the hipster doofus i was talking about before.

Synopsis: EVERYTHING HAS BEEN RUINED BY STEROIDS PLEASE STOP ENJOYING THE SPORT K THX ps enjoy some really, really inane metaphrors ok bye

http://sports.yahoo.com/mlb/news;_ylt=AnRExGcUWvgD3FTPzaaXldYRvLYF?slug=jp-hgh061206&prov=yhoo&type=lgns

Baseball's HGH problem June 7, 2006
The Grimsley case highlights the difficult choices the sport will have to make to police the use of human growth hormone.

Bonds' tragedy of errors May 20, 2006
The baseball world should be Barry Bonds' stage, but controversy has rendered him a fallen hero.

At the letters: Fans sound off on Bonds May 15, 2006
Love Barry Bonds or hate him, it seems everyone has an opinion on the Giants slugger.

More Barry being Barry May 13, 2006
SAN FRANCISCO – After 21 years and 713 home runs, Barry Bonds still doesn't get it.

Split decision May 11, 2006
SAN FRANCISCO – Thinking about the meaning of Barry Bonds is enough to give one man a brain cramp.

BALCO isn't done with Barry Bonds May 10, 2006
BURLINGAME, Calif. – All references to the infamous laboratory are gone at its former headquarters, but its legacy will not die.

Bonds-Magowan smackdown looming? May 10, 2006
SAN FRANCISCO – With Barry Bonds nearing free agency, the coming months could get interesting between the Giants' slugger and principal owner.

Head games May 3, 2006
MILWAUKEE – As the world tunes in, Barry Bonds is finding it harder to concentrate on the task at hand.

Mets pitcher gets 50-game doping ban April 28, 2006
Yusaku Iriki is the first player to be suspended 50 games for violating the major-league policy against performance-enhancing drugs.

Off to a flying start April 24, 2006
MILWAUKEE – For whatever reason – good weather, juiced players, juiced balls – homers are being hit at a record pace.

A real gem April 15, 2006
BOSTON – David Ortiz happily dances to his own beat in setting the tone for the Red Sox.

Homecoming for Thome April 3, 2006
CHICAGO – Healthy again and playing in his home state, Jim Thome just might help bring the White Sox another World Series title.

Selig's gesture rings hollow March 30, 2006
If the planned investigation into steroid use is as thorough as promised, there can be only one result – Bud Selig's resignation.

The ghost of Barry Bonds March 16, 2006
SCOTTSDALE, Ariz. – The Giants slugger is dead to the baseball world. And, sadly, he's the only one who doesn't realize it.

Questions for Barry March 8, 2006
Barry Bonds could face perjury and obstruction of justice charges following the release of a new book, a leading attorney says.

That has to be an out of options move. Did Kotchman just come off the DL? He has been up and down for the past few years and he may have been out of options. It is still suprising as Weaver has been about their best starter for the past few weeks.

Come on, Simmons.

This reads like a Yard-Work piece.

Hogwash. I hear it on sports talk radio stations, throughout the media, and from fans on the street … everyone thinks it is so important to be hot going into the playoffs.

Once you make the postseason, you have to get hot. It is not always about momentum going into the playoffs, my friends. The same can be said for the NCAA basketball tournament.

A lot of schools are electric, playing winning basketball in their conference tournament. Unfortunately they often work so hard to win the conference title and then suffer upset city in the big dance. Look at Syracuse capturing the 2006 Big East championship with a great run, led by Gerry McNamara. The Orange lost in the first round of the NCAA to Texas A&M. Last season Iowa won the Big Ten championship but lost in the first round of the NCAA to Northwestern State. It happens!

Then there is baseball. How hot were the Tigers at the end of the regular season? They weren't, getting swept by the Royals while losing its grip on the AL Central. Detroit dropped five in a row prior to beating the Yankees. Everyone said they had to be hot going into the playoffs. Tell that to Jimmy Leyland. Detroit didn't buy it and New York, which came in hot, won 97 games in the regular season and had a lineup called Murderer's Row and Cano, went home.

Leyland is a master motivator and a winner. Just check out his record. His heart and soul was in Pittsburgh, Florida and now Detroit.

Look at the Cardinals and their struggles, going 3-9 down the stretch. Tony LaRussa's team limped into the playoffs, suffered through a bunch of injuries, and they got past the Padres in four.

Talk, talk, talk… you have to win on the field.

Now we have the ALCS and NLCS. Imagine if we have the Tigers and Cardinals in the World Series. Besides being a rematch of the great 1968 series, it would be LaRussa vs. Leyland and there is so much respect there. Leyland was working on scouting for the Cardinals while living in Pittsburgh, watching future St. Louis opponents when they faced the Pirates. LaRussa gave him his first job as a coach with the White Sox.

My gut feeling is Tigers vs. Mets in the World Series. Willie Randolph has done a great job. In the end, I think it is going to be Motown Madness, baby! Get the Temptations, the Four Tops, Diana Ross and the Supremes! It is going to be Berry Gordy time as the Tigers to win the World Series in six.

I loved this, from a recent NY Times. Richard Sandomir dismantles Brennaman and Lyons with a patience I don't think I'd be able to muster:

On Fox, Sour Notes From a Pair of Veteran Voices
By RICHARD SANDOMIR

It was difficult not to see that the left-hander Tyler Johnson had come in to relieve for the St. Louis Cardinals on Sunday night.

His name is on the back of his uniform. Fox flashed up a graphic. To paraphrase the old umpire Jim Honochick, who donned glasses to recognize Boog Powell in a classic Miller Lite commercial: “Hey, that’s Tyler Johnson!” On KTRS, the Cardinals’ radio station, John Rooney did not stumble on the issue. “Tyler Johnson is ready to face Josh Bard,” he said.

• But for 35 seconds, against the visual evidence before him, Fox’s Thom Brennaman insisted that Johnson was the right-hander Josh Kinney. He gave his age and his long years in the minor leagues and said, “Here he is, pitching Game 4 of the National League division series.”

Through the first and second pitches, Johnson was still Kinney. By the time the third pitch was thrown, Brennaman realized his enormous error.

“Oh, I beg your pardon,” he said. Johnson, he discovered, was pitching, not Kinney. Kinney then relieved Johnson.

Brennaman’s faux pas was his own. But Tim McCarver didn’t say a word. And no one else in Fox’s production truck or booth appeared to offer an informational lifeline.

When you become known for making mistakes, or for your immaturity, it’s hard to wash away the image. If you’re a great announcer, it’s easier to forgive the errors.

But Brennaman is not great. He is mediocre, distinguished mainly by an unmodulated megaphone-like voice that is like a parody of what a sportscaster should sound like. It does not convey a warm welcome, or the promise of excellence, as do Vin Scully or ESPN’s Jon Miller, who was joined for Friday night’s Yankees-Tigers game in Detroit by the retired Ernie Harwell, ever a delightful and welcoming legend.

Worse, for Brennaman, is his usual boothmate, Steve Lyons, a childish personality who has never attempted to live down his nickname, Psycho. Lyons is capable of an occasional insight. But he also made ignorant remarks two years ago about Shawn Green, who is Jewish, regarding why he did not play for the Dodgers on Yom Kippur. Fox suspended Lyons briefly.

In their years together, Lyons and Brennaman have shown no growth as a team. And Fox has yet to show a desire to find a better backup duo for McCarver and Joe Buck. Once upon a time in the 1980’s at NBC, Bob Costas and Tony Kubek backed up the No. 1 team of Scully and Joe Garagiola.

All of which leads to the regrettable incident last Thursday during Game 2 of the Dodgers-Mets playoff series at Shea Stadium. Brennaman and Lyons bonded like spitballing 13-year-olds in a middle school lunchroom to mock a Mets fan who was wearing an unusual-looking device over his eyes to help his poor vision. Stephen Teitelbaum, blind except for peripheral vision in one eye, was wearing a Jordy, a magnifying device, to help him watch the game.

Brennaman and Lyons could not know those details when the camera found Teitelbaum, but they could see that he was not goofing with a child’s toy. Still, they pursued him as if he were the class weakling. What was he wearing, they wondered?

“A Psycho-meter,” Brennaman said, to welcome Lyons to town.

“Maybe he’s in virtual reality,” Lyons said. If he is, Lyons explained, “he should stay there.”

And maybe, Lyons suggested, the Dodgers should don the contraptions to better hit Tom Glavine. Lyons then hit on the most logical puerile explanation: “He’s got a digital camera stuck to his face.”

This insensitive nonsense went on for 53 seconds while Marlon Anderson batted, offering a window into stunted imaginations. But it also underscored the failure by anyone at Fox to tell them to let up. Fox could have dispatched someone to Teitelbaum’s seat to report back on his condition. Instead, Teitelbaum’s family called Fox on Friday, leading to Brennaman’s on-air mea culpa early in Game 3 Saturday from Los Angeles.

This, then, is the second-best team Fox has to offer, the one that will call the American League Championship Series. Fox could do better by elevating Josh Lewin, who had a terrific game Saturday when the Tigers took their division series against the Yankees. Or Fox could show good sense by reaching out to SNY’s Gary Cohen to replace Brennaman.

But such a move seems unlikely. The Foxians love Brennaman enough to make him the voice of two Bowl Championship Series broadcasts, including the title game. Maybe his huge, unrestrained voice will be more suitable for college bowl games.

• Lyons, who worked with Lewin in Detroit on Saturday, has mastered the art of the absolute statement but falters at factual precision. Alex Rodriguez had an “unbelievable” season, he said, but he clearly did not. Derek Jeter had his best year, he said, but his numbers were better in 1999.

As the Yankees succumbed to Detroit’s Jeremy Bonderman on Saturday, Lyons ignored mounting evidence that the Yankees’ potency was more the stuff of fantasy baseball than of postseason reality, to say they comprised “arguably the best offensive lineup that’s ever been produced.”

distinguished mainly by an unmodulated megaphone-like voice that is like a parody of what a sportscaster should sound like

Not only is this guy an idiot, but his voice is horrible as well, I think this description nails it. It's got this air of fake self importance.

a better backup duo for McCarver and Joe Buck

I hate it when writers misuse "for" for "than."

Wow, I really don't think so at all.

I hate it when writers misuse "for" for "than."

This is not a case of that, tho.

Piniella is easily the most tolerable of the 3.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FINIQILRjwU

And, of course, I encourange any and all broadcasting asshats to talk about lazy inscrutable wallet-stealing Kosher showboaters whenever they feel the need to bloviate, in the hopes that maybe they'll get fired, too.

how did they "save themselves the embarrassment of admitting they made a mistake in hiring the chump in the first place," exactly?

Joe Morgan: (11:56 AM ET ) Well, they're very similar to Chicago last year. Detroit lost the division down the stretch and Chicago almost did last year. But I do think this layoff will effect Detroit.

Joe Morgan: (12:00 PM ET ) Well, they didn't use the radar gun on every pitch as they do now. Make no mistake about it, some of these readings are jacked up. I don't think anyone today throws any harder than Nolan Ryan or Gibson or any of those guys threw. But I don't know about any team that has the guys that can throw as hard as the Tigers.

[fire Andy_K xpost]

hence the Dem prospects in the midterm election!

Rob Neyer: (12:52 PM ET ) Well, this might get me fired, but I went over his offensive comments a few times and I have to say . . . I wasn't offended. But then, unless somebody's flat-out lying, I'm pretty hard to offend. Unlike Lyons' erstwhile employers, who of course are known for their tasteful prime-time programming.

Early in Friday's game, Marco Scutaro was included in a graphic with Frank Thomas and Nick Swisher noting their "0-fors" in the ALCS through two games. Lou Piniella scoffed that Scutaro was even included in the graphic, for although the shortstop had a super ALDS, expecting similar production would be "like finding a wallet on a Friday night and looking for one on Sunday and Monday, too."

Flash ahead several minutes later; the announcers had moved onto entirely different topics.

Piniella said the A's needed Thomas to get "en fuego" (hot in Spanish) because he was currently "frio" (cold).

"The bilingual Lou Piniella," play-by-play man Thom Brennaman intoned.

Then Lyons said, "Lou's habla-ing some Espanol there, and I'm still looking for my wallet." Some quiet laughter ensued.

"I don't understand him," Lyons continued, "and I don't want to sit close to him now."

As Altman-Ohr says, apparently it was a joke - but what was the joke, exactly? Maybe Neyer can tell us.

If Beane makes Baker the A’s first African-American manager, this will boost attendance among black baseball fans. And who knows what this would mean to Oakland’s chances of choking off Fremont. Beane and Baker have strong personalities. Beane prefers managers who are acquiescent. However, if Beane truly wants to get to the World Series, he needs to bend from form.

Bend toward Dusty Baker.

Seriously, time to lock the thread because nothing can top that. Every line is a mindkiller. Like this one:

Twenty years ago, Baker wound up a splendid playing career in Oakland. So he has an understanding of how the A's organization works.

WHAAAAAAAAA*#$Y:$*@#U@*

To be fair, the A's crowds are no different.

More offensive than what Lyons said?

japans ppl eat like THIS...

Does it get any less retarded after the "Insider" jump?

Reading that, maybe he meant Mauer SHOULD have won the Gold Glove?

A better case is obviously the defense question (edge Mauer no contest, though Morneau isn't that awful), along with Joe's role as a catcher (giving signals, settling down pitchers -- including rookies Bonser, Liriano and Garza) and the fact that Morneau credits a lot of his improvement and patience at the plate to hanging out with Mauer all the time. It's just not a hey-duh gimme going by offense alone.

And Pudge was maybe a hair better than Mauer at catcher (no fucking with a .998 FP and .500+ CS rate -- and at age 34!) so if he meant Mauer SHOULD have won the Gold Glove that would've also been kinda dopey.

Player B creates 5.5% more outs than Player A. Outs are the most valuable thing in baseball blah blah blah. Every analysis I've seen points to OBP being roughly 100% more valuable for a 1-5 hitter and 50% more valuable for the 6-7 hitters, falling off more (I believe) for those hitting 8-9.

Joe's role as a catcher (giving signals, settling down pitchers -- including rookies Bonser, Liriano and Garza)
That's an argument akin to catcher ERA and intangibles. It may exist, but it's not something you look hard at. The real value of Mauer as catcher is that he's providing a top-5 offensive season playing at what is now, the absolute worst offensive position in baseball. (And also providing well above-average defense, icing on the cake)

Morneau was very good this year, but not spectacular for his position - it would be relatively easy to replace him with another first-tier player. Mauer, OTOH, was absolutely amazing compared to his fellow catchers.

If you go by WARP, Morneau was .6 wins better than Konerko and .1 better than Teixeira. Mauer was 1.6 wins better than the nearest catcher (Posada) and 3.8 better than Victor Martinez. That's a helluva gap.

Which works for theoretical scenarios in sabermetricsland but seriously, are you familiar with Terry Ryan? "replace him with another first-tier player" is about as real-world monetarily feasible as "new stadium to be made of gold with unicorn-hide turf". I think the dude waits for someone else's candy purchase to get stuck in the vending machine so he can try to get a two-for-one.

As far as those other points, perhaps it is I who are the dumbass.

Surprisingly tough on the knees

-- gear (speed.to.roa...), November 22nd, 2006 6:14 AM. (gear) (later)

put the crack down, gear, and walk away.