I WISH HE WAS MY BOYFRIEND: H<b>♂</b>M<b>♂</b>SEXUAL EDITION

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NOW ACCEPTING APPLICATIONS

― elmo argonaut (allocryptic), Friday, 12 May 2006 03:48 (nineteen years ago)

it's a shame that all my gay friends (with the exception of you) are femmes.

― val (notvalery), Friday, 12 May 2006 03:52 (nineteen years ago)

http://discovolante.free.fr/photos/patton/40.jpg

i wish young mike patton would be gay for me

― elmo argonaut (allocryptic), Friday, 12 May 2006 03:53 (nineteen years ago)

Elmo, more athletic supporter pics plz

-- Drew Daniel (mces...) (webmail), May 12th, 2006 5:04 PM. (Drew Daniel) (later) (link) (admin) (userip)

― JW (ex machina), Friday, 12 May 2006 20:06 (nineteen years ago)

shaman on train told me my next bf would arrive in August.

um, okay.

don't want.

btw, shaman on train was gay.

and schizo!

but femme :(.

― JEANNE (ex libris), Saturday, 13 May 2006 02:21 (nineteen years ago)

http://is0.okcupid.com/users/496/692/496693709843194220/p1146616196.jpg

le sigh

― elmo argonaut (allocryptic), Monday, 15 May 2006 16:40 (nineteen years ago)

I will try to admire/lust after Mike Patton for your sake, Andrew.

― Laurel (Laurel), Monday, 15 May 2006 16:48 (nineteen years ago)

ELMO, HOLLER AT CHAKI

;)

― ddb (ddb), Monday, 15 May 2006 16:55 (nineteen years ago)

somone post the bro in the red shirt pixxx

― JW (ex machina), Monday, 15 May 2006 16:57 (nineteen years ago)

I DONT GET IT

― city of gyros (chaki), Monday, 15 May 2006 17:03 (nineteen years ago)

U GOT THAT LONG HAIR, GOATEE, ROCKER, BASS PLAYER, MIKE PATTON THING GOING ON.

SADLY, U DONT HAVE THAT, I LIKE TO KISS BOYS THING GOING ON.

― ddb (ddb), Monday, 15 May 2006 17:08 (nineteen years ago)

I HAVE A GIRLFRIEND!!!!!!

― city of gyros (chaki), Monday, 15 May 2006 17:13 (nineteen years ago)

SO DOES JON WILLIAMS.

WHAT A COUNTRY!

― ddb (ddb), Monday, 15 May 2006 17:20 (nineteen years ago)

lolz

― Allyzay Rofflesbot (allyzay), Monday, 15 May 2006 17:22 (nineteen years ago)

"I LIKE TO KISS BOYS" == UNDERQUALIFIED

"WANT COCKS NOW" == APPLY IN PERSON

― elmo argonaut (allocryptic), Monday, 15 May 2006 17:29 (nineteen years ago)

Chaki also doesn't have that "founding/fronting two dozen horrible metal bands and singing like an opera reject in all of them." Cf also " changing time sig every 16 measures"

― Laurel (Laurel), Monday, 15 May 2006 17:45 (nineteen years ago)

i wish i did though

― city of gyros (chaki), Monday, 15 May 2006 17:46 (nineteen years ago)

bonus points for broken noses

― elmo argonaut (allocryptic), Monday, 15 May 2006 18:28 (nineteen years ago)

this guy:

http://static.flickr.com/56/146678194_8b6d1c7c1f.jpg?v=0

pinched my ass saturday night

― cutty (mcutt), Monday, 15 May 2006 18:38 (nineteen years ago)

He did? I wouldn't have thought yr cheeks were chubby enough.

― Laurel (Laurel), Monday, 15 May 2006 18:40 (nineteen years ago)

PHIL IS........GAY?????

― gbx (skowly), Monday, 15 May 2006 18:43 (nineteen years ago)

i have quite an ass, ask lauren

― cutty (mcutt), Monday, 15 May 2006 18:43 (nineteen years ago)

or ask phil

― cutty (mcutt), Monday, 15 May 2006 18:44 (nineteen years ago)

ass pix plz

― elmo argonaut (allocryptic), Monday, 15 May 2006 18:46 (nineteen years ago)

I was actually thinking of upper-body cheeks, I know how Phil likes 'em. But okay!

― Laurel (Laurel), Monday, 15 May 2006 18:46 (nineteen years ago)

Phil was asking me about [CONTROVERSIAL MODERATOR EDIT] on Saturday!

― JW (ex machina), Monday, 15 May 2006 18:52 (nineteen years ago)

see also: Timothy Olyphant

― elmo argonaut (allocryptic), Thursday, 18 May 2006 15:29 (nineteen years ago)

wow phil's outfit!

― Allyzay Rofflesbot (allyzay), Thursday, 18 May 2006 15:43 (nineteen years ago)

i want the jpegs of gygax-as-phil

― electro-acoustic lycanthrope (orion), Thursday, 18 May 2006 15:44 (nineteen years ago)

i want the jpegs of gygax-as-phil

-- electro-acoustic lycanthrope (dr.carl.saga...) (webmail), May 18th, 2006 12:44 PM. (orion) (later) (link) (admin) (userip)

― JW (ex machina), Thursday, 18 May 2006 17:33 (nineteen years ago)

one month passes...

http://myspace-663.vo.llnwd.net/00220/36/64/220314663_l.jpg

HEY, YOU ORNALDO-BLOOMPS-LOOKING MAWFUCKER
I'M GONNA POP YR CHERRY

― elmo argonaut (allocryptic), Friday, 7 July 2006 20:32 (nineteen years ago)

Staring pensively into campfire so works for dudes.

― choinklate (nickalicious), Friday, 7 July 2006 20:40 (nineteen years ago)

too much jewelry

― killy (baby lenin pin), Friday, 7 July 2006 20:42 (nineteen years ago)

Ornaldo Bloomps? More like Durst-erlake.

I'd totally hit it, though.

― jaymc (jaymc), Friday, 7 July 2006 20:54 (nineteen years ago)

totally. who is that?

― jed_ (jed), Friday, 7 July 2006 20:57 (nineteen years ago)

he dated my friend m3lissa who informed me of his, er, homo-curiosity & submissive tendencies. she is going to help me scheme into his pants.

― elmo argonaut (allocryptic), Friday, 7 July 2006 21:05 (nineteen years ago)

this is in exchange for brokering hot sex between her and my friend gr3c0. this guy's cherry is my commission for said hardcore diplomatic services.

― elmo argonaut (allocryptic), Friday, 7 July 2006 21:08 (nineteen years ago)

also of note: if successful, this would be the 3rd guy that m3lissa and I have both fucked (not simultaneously)

― elmo argonaut (allocryptic), Friday, 7 July 2006 21:11 (nineteen years ago)

holy shit. good luck with that!

― jed_ (jed), Friday, 7 July 2006 21:15 (nineteen years ago)

he may not need too much luck if this guy is admittedly curious AND submissive...

― tehresa, who will here remain anonymous (tehresa), Friday, 7 July 2006 21:36 (nineteen years ago)

plus, it's andrew and he's awesome and he has a proven record of making shit happen w/ this girl m3lissa's boys!

― tehresa, who will here remain anonymous (tehresa), Friday, 7 July 2006 21:37 (nineteen years ago)

that's just what happens when you & your friend have the same taste in guys

― elmo argonaut (allocryptic), Friday, 7 July 2006 21:51 (nineteen years ago)

that guy looks like a pussy.

― gbx (skowly), Saturday, 8 July 2006 00:28 (nineteen years ago)

tho,

dude, if your looking for campfire staring, bracelet and beanie wearing dudes with chin beards, you should probably book a trip to the Greater Western States. The ski/college town I live in is full of dudes like that.

Plus, we're in Montana, so they might be gay without even knowing it!!

― gbx (skowly), Saturday, 8 July 2006 00:28 (nineteen years ago)

that guy looks like a pussy

exactly

― elmo argonaut (allocryptic), Saturday, 8 July 2006 22:22 (nineteen years ago)

haha..

break him in like a baseball glove.

― jinx hijinks (sanskrit), Sunday, 9 July 2006 00:31 (nineteen years ago)

one month passes...

http://is0.okcupid.com/users/496/692/496693709843194220/p1146616196.jpg

WE MET AND DRANK THE BEER HE MADE

THEN WE PLAYED LASER TAG

AND MADE OUT FOR LIKE, 2 HOURS

it was so motherfucking cute.

― elmo argonaut (allocryptic), Wednesday, 16 August 2006 00:17 (nineteen years ago)

did phil ever tell the chinese train story?

― Fetchboy (Felcher), Wednesday, 16 August 2006 01:06 (nineteen years ago)

yes!

― genital hyphys (haitch), Wednesday, 16 August 2006 01:44 (nineteen years ago)

Phil was asking me about [CONTROVERSIAL MODERATOR EDIT] on Saturday!

what was i asking about?!?!

― phil-two (phil-two), Wednesday, 16 August 2006 02:03 (nineteen years ago)

damn you

― Machibuse '80 (ex machina), Wednesday, 16 August 2006 02:43 (nineteen years ago)

what's going on here?

― Drew Daniel (Drew Daniel), Wednesday, 16 August 2006 02:48 (nineteen years ago)

drew plz take me to tubesteak connection on thursday! i dont want to go alone!! ive never been to SF

― phil-two (phil-two), Wednesday, 16 August 2006 02:54 (nineteen years ago)

andrew that is super cute!!!

― tehresa needs more out of this relationship than she's willing to put in (tehres, Wednesday, 16 August 2006 02:54 (nineteen years ago)

phil I'm honestly not sure if it's still going on or not . . .

I will try to find out though, and it's sweet of you to ask for a chaperone . . .

― Drew Daniel (Drew Daniel), Wednesday, 16 August 2006 04:23 (nineteen years ago)

haha, if it's NOT still going on, go to Aunt Charlie's.

― Dr Morbius (Dr Morbius), Wednesday, 16 August 2006 14:17 (nineteen years ago)

tehresa: right?

the catch is that he lives 2+ hrs away. so lame.

― elmo argonaut (allocryptic), Wednesday, 16 August 2006 15:57 (nineteen years ago)

how do you make out for 2 hours without ending up just having sex? i don't think i've ever done that!

drew, lemme know. it sounds like a lot of fun. otherwise i'll probably just end up going to like, frisco disco or whatever.

― phil-two (phil-two), Wednesday, 16 August 2006 17:25 (nineteen years ago)

well... (a) it was the first time we had met, and (b) he'd not had sex with a guy before, and (c) i really liked him and sexing wasn't a priority

― elmo argonaut (allocryptic), Wednesday, 16 August 2006 17:33 (nineteen years ago)

then again... WHY OH WHY WITH ME AND ALL THE BI-CURIOUS BOYS???

o well

― elmo argonaut (allocryptic), Wednesday, 16 August 2006 17:40 (nineteen years ago)

ohhh thats really adorable! next time then, sexing. at least "heavy petting", or whatever.

― phil-two (phil-two), Wednesday, 16 August 2006 17:45 (nineteen years ago)

Dude has a goatee - you made out with him?

― milo z (mlp), Wednesday, 16 August 2006 18:34 (nineteen years ago)

um, yes. wtf? you slow or something?

― elmo argonaut (allocryptic), Wednesday, 16 August 2006 19:00 (nineteen years ago)

yes. he's slow.

― chaki (chaki), Wednesday, 16 August 2006 19:10 (nineteen years ago)

I'm just anti-goatee.

― milo z (mlp), Wednesday, 16 August 2006 19:10 (nineteen years ago)

dude, well-deployed facial hair is like (culturally acceptable) make-up for dudes. learn to love it.

― elmo argonaut (allocryptic), Wednesday, 16 August 2006 19:16 (nineteen years ago)

No such thing as a well-deployed goatee.

― milo z (mlp), Wednesday, 16 August 2006 19:17 (nineteen years ago)

yr on thin ice, buster.

― elmo argonaut (allocryptic), Wednesday, 16 August 2006 19:25 (nineteen years ago)

wow phil's outfit!

was it a little too much? laurel said i looked ridiculous! which i guess she has a point, maybe

― phil-two (phil-two), Wednesday, 16 August 2006 19:29 (nineteen years ago)

In a charming way, Phil. Always.

― Laurel (Laurel), Wednesday, 16 August 2006 19:41 (nineteen years ago)

Phil- I might be going to that Skoltz-Kolgen thing at Recombinant Media Labs tonite- which would make me a late arrival to Aunt Charlie's . . . just warning of potential source of uncertainty re: cocktails in the Tenderloin

― Drew Daniel (Drew Daniel), Thursday, 17 August 2006 18:48 (nineteen years ago)

skoltz-kogen!

― s1ocki (slutsky), Thursday, 17 August 2006 18:51 (nineteen years ago)

gehsundheit!

― latebloomer (latebloomer), Thursday, 17 August 2006 19:02 (nineteen years ago)

cocktails in the Tenderloin

^^^ does this mean buttsex?

― gbx (skowly), Thursday, 17 August 2006 19:04 (nineteen years ago)

it's a Belle And Sebastian lyric

― Steve Shasta (Steve Shasta), Thursday, 17 August 2006 19:06 (nineteen years ago)

So...that's a yes?

― Laurel (Laurel), Thursday, 17 August 2006 19:28 (nineteen years ago)

Shasta, California Wake Boarder

― David R. (popshots75`), Thursday, 17 August 2006 19:41 (nineteen years ago)

Phil- I might be going to that Skoltz-Kolgen thing at Recombinant Media Labs tonite- which would make me a late arrival to Aunt Charlie's

i just googled this. sounds crazy! may check it out. i guess i'll try tubesteak tonite, and blowup tomorrow. i brought the above outfit with me, sans the sailor hat though.

― phil-two (phil-two), Thursday, 17 August 2006 20:09 (nineteen years ago)

:-(

― Steve Shasta (Steve Shasta), Thursday, 17 August 2006 20:10 (nineteen years ago)

it looked better on shasta anyway

― phil-two (phil-two), Thursday, 17 August 2006 20:31 (nineteen years ago)

"NOBODY FUCKS WITH STEVE SHASTA CELEBRITY WAKEBOARDER"

do you really wakeboard or is it just a front for something cooler?

― a name means a lot just by itself (lfam), Thursday, 17 August 2006 21:01 (nineteen years ago)

I also do macrame, spellunking and cribbage.

― Steve Shasta (Steve Shasta), Thursday, 17 August 2006 21:10 (nineteen years ago)

Phil-Two, you stand accused of . . . standing me up at Tubesteak!!!! . . . there I was, skulking around, approaching every cute n trendy Asian gentleman on the dancefloor asking them "Are you Phil-Two?" and getting the gasface (or faulty claims that they were Phil Four etc.). How do you plead?

― Drew Daniel (Drew Daniel), Friday, 18 August 2006 07:08 (nineteen years ago)

OMG I was there! I just got home from tubesteak! Chit chatted with the DJ. He played Slice Me Nice

― phil-two (phil-two), Friday, 18 August 2006 08:18 (nineteen years ago)

oh no maybe i was uncute and untrendy and well, asian, and un-gentlemanlylike!

― phil-two (phil-two), Friday, 18 August 2006 08:19 (nineteen years ago)

I was there from 11:30 to 1 AM and then I ker-split . . . perhaps it wasn't meant to be? I was wearing a t shirt that said TUCSON with a howling wolf drawing on it. I also talked to the DJ and got a drink ticket n stuff. I was talking outside to Jacob (aka Dj PeePlay) and Frankie (who does the Work Me Godammit party). But no Phil. Cad! Heartbreaker!

― Drew Daniel (Drew Daniel), Friday, 18 August 2006 08:32 (nineteen years ago)

Oh drats! I was there from about 12:30 onwards. It was pretty fun, considering i didn't know anyone there. drinks were cheap too. oof, sorry!!! i didn't see any wolfshirts though... :(

oh noes. oh well. are you going to blowup on friday?

― phil-two (phil-two), Friday, 18 August 2006 08:40 (nineteen years ago)

noise board missed connections :(

― tehresa needs more out of this relationship than she's willing to put in (tehres, Friday, 18 August 2006 10:51 (nineteen years ago)

Well we both had fun, just separately. I don't know if I'm going out again until that Let's Lazer Tag Sometime party. Sorry Elmo, we seem to have hijacked yr thread.

― Drew Daniel (Drew Daniel), Friday, 18 August 2006 17:11 (nineteen years ago)

aww, I don't mind -- you could hijack anything of mine without complaint. [/slut]

― elmo argonaut (allocryptic), Friday, 18 August 2006 17:18 (nineteen years ago)

an actual club night with real lazer tag would be amazing

― mentalismé (sanskrit), Friday, 18 August 2006 17:21 (nineteen years ago)

laser tag is fun (q.v. upthread)

― elmo argonaut (allocryptic), Friday, 18 August 2006 17:30 (nineteen years ago)

i prefer Photon [/loozer]

― =[[ (eman), Friday, 18 August 2006 18:04 (nineteen years ago)

weird, elmo did reference laser tag upthread before drew did..

eman, laser tag:photon::transformers:go-bots

― mentalismé (sanskrit), Friday, 18 August 2006 19:18 (nineteen years ago)

laser tag is also the subject of the opening post in I wish she was my girlfriend

it's like... synchrodipity... or something.

― elmo argonaut (allocryptic), Friday, 18 August 2006 19:34 (nineteen years ago)

photon aka loser tag

― =[[ (eman), Friday, 18 August 2006 21:17 (nineteen years ago)

where were you guys when dj funk played blowup? on stage with shirts off? hottt-ness.

― yours fondly, harshaw. (mrgn), Friday, 18 August 2006 22:43 (nineteen years ago)

Must be my FutureSex/LoveSound.

― Tim Ellison (Tim Ellison), Friday, 25 August 2006 17:32 (nineteen years ago)

one month passes...

Dear really nice/smart/cute dude from class who has a girlfriend in OKLAHOMA:

the way I see it, THREE PEOPLE are not getting laid.

With my easy three-step plan AT LEAST TWO PEOPLE can get some.

1. break up w/ girlfriend
2. ????
3. profit!

PLZ CONSIDER.

luv,
me

― Jessie the Monster (scarymonsterrr), Thursday, 28 September 2006 14:32 (nineteen years ago)

this is the i wish he was my boyfriend circle with an arrow through it and pointing up thread

― rrrobyn, the situation (rrrobyn), Thursday, 28 September 2006 14:40 (nineteen years ago)

USE MOD POWERS.

― Jessie the Monster (scarymonsterrr), Thursday, 28 September 2006 14:44 (nineteen years ago)

a man needs a fine-looking BACK OF NECK!

― Dr Morbius (Dr Morbius), Thursday, 28 September 2006 15:43 (nineteen years ago)

that goes for women too

― roc u like a § (ex machina), Thursday, 28 September 2006 15:49 (nineteen years ago)

i love the back of necks!

― jaxon (jaxon), Friday, 29 September 2006 04:15 (nineteen years ago)

I adore
back of necks
beautifully shaven

Gives me
always
always
always
always
always
always
a pretty rush down my spine!

All those boys
with fascinating fingers
working, creating
touching their tools

Gives me
always
always
always
always
always
always
a pretty rush down my spine!

― elmo argonaut (allocryptic), Friday, 29 September 2006 04:29 (nineteen years ago)

(\:-|

― jaxon (jaxon), Friday, 29 September 2006 06:14 (nineteen years ago)

beautifully unshaven for me, Ms. Gudmundsdottirrrrr.

― Dr Morbius (Dr Morbius), Friday, 29 September 2006 13:47 (nineteen years ago)

I always knew you wanted a party in the back, Morb!

― David R. (popshots75`), Friday, 29 September 2006 13:52 (nineteen years ago)

not ON the back, if it's mowerable-thick!

― Dr Morbius (Dr Morbius), Friday, 29 September 2006 16:51 (nineteen years ago)

ten months pass...

swgm seeks cuddlebuddy

hey guys

― elmo argonaut, Wednesday, 1 August 2007 16:03 (eighteen years ago)

BUDDYTIME!

― jaxon, Wednesday, 1 August 2007 18:22 (eighteen years ago)

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I WISH HE WAS MY BOYFRIEND: H♂M♂SEXUAL EDITION