Everybody in the bank line knows, I've got a crush on the new teller...

She looks so glam, I think, I am never going to catch the eye of cute boy! SEB is being a total flirtslut but I still think he notices me more!!!

Then I go to the bar and he stops playing records.

HOORAY NOW I WILL TALK TO HIM!!!

I turn to see him sitting in the corner with another girl. She conforms to the indie girl stereotype in another way ie dark haired bob with purple bits (er, ok that is ME TOO hooray) but looks THE PARTY and OH NO!! Indie boy is with totally indie girl!! I decide to sit down, and the club, which up until then had only me, indieboy and SEB there is now full apart from a seat next to the couple.

I take it, whilst shouting across the room to my friend that Shiny McWhiny is a "beeyotch".

Indieboy turns to me and says "it's beeyatch!"

I say "Sorry, I've been hanging out on the west coast too long!" tee hee GIGGLE GIGGLE ect

He turns around to talk to me and....

AND....

BANG!

I WAKE UP and now I will NEVER KNOW.

Mostly the furthest I go to pursue a crush is to the BAR to order more GIN so I either
a) have nerve to say hello
b) have nerve to smile
c) fall over
d) puke
e) fall over and puke (hahaha)

I have had two boyfriends and looking back on my life am quite frankly AMAZED.

Oh wait, someone else has posted to it, never mind. Carry on, we'll have our OWN thread, cause that other thread is all boys perving on girls. This shall be girls perving on boys.

He has a name so pretty that it's silly.

And it's so pathetic because I only ever work up the courage to talk to him when I'm so drunk I can't stand, so therefore he thinks I'm a freak and is scared of me.

I always get crushes on soundmen. Well... when they're young and good-looking, not the scary ones with beards and Zildjian t-shirts. It's cause my dad was a soundman, girls always get crushes on guys just like their dads. (I suppose it's better that I fixate on soundmen than on computer programmers or Labour party councillors...)

1) Obsessional Crushes that you think about all the time and pervade your every waking thought
2) Pick-Me-Up Crushes you think about occasionally when you need a quick mood enhancer
3) Situational Crushes you only ever remember when you're in the situation, i.e., you go to a shop and suddenly remember "Oh, yeah, that cute boy works here..."

My god, I could write, like, the Illustrated Field Guide Of Crushes...

Hrmmmm... if there's ever a Lollies/Kate St.C "greatest hits" (hah!) sort of thing, it would have to be called the Illustrated Field Guide Of Crushes.

I remember talking about being terrified that crushees will find out because they would be offended or terrified (even though most people are merely flattered) because that's my usual reaction to being a crushee (unless it's ironic or iconic or ionic or bionic crush) and it has ruined several friendships for me... but. We can still talk about it...

I have had university classes where the only reason I carried on going was because of a cute boy... so I'd have done even worse at school if it wasn't for them.

But this more about random - and therefore perfect fodder for idealisation - crushes on total strangers.

(and yes there are ILXors whose looks i do know, and some i have even met, on whom i likewise have crushes, but that's quite enough idealisation for now)

Uuuh, yeah, I think that counts, Marcello. If you evince all the other signs of crush-hood, like getting the warm fuzzies when you see them post, and, like, checking out messages on subjects you think they'd like, to see if they're on there. Not that I've, erm, ever done anything like that on ILX.

Though, erm, that negates the random stranger-hood of the crush, doesn't it? Oh, I don't know.

Gareth, * V*ne H*ll thinks you should put in an "I Saw You" ad. This is far worthier than perving on 16 year olds from Shreeveport on LNC.com ...

I always have thought that, which is why I don't think I ever talked about any crushes I had. Plus, most of my crushes last about a week and then are forgotten, so it doesn't seem worth it to say anything.

yeah, same here. this week: the hairdressers' assistant (had a hair cut on tuesday).

(opening a v posh expensive grocery store on the edge a council estate, when there are several dirt-cheap corner shops within a few hundred yards = not a good business move. They must have been aiming at all the rich politicians who weren't (and still aren't) there because their Parliament was (and is ) still a building site.)

Do you expect me to give away where I live? ;-)

(i suppose i did give a fairly obvious description though. Busted!)

But yes, the girl at the Tim Horton's back in my first few years at univesity. She used to give me stickers and her coworkers used to tease her when I came in. That crush went up in smoke when I cut cigarettes out of my life, she was a blossoming chain smoker.

the best was Scary Waitress, who worked in South Street in Dublin. She was italian, had her hair in mentalist plaits, and used to bully her clientele. Then she cut off her long hair and turned out to have a biker boyfriend. Borrrring.

the most i ever did to pursue a crush was I ASKED HIM OUT. this was a bad idea.

How do you say "I think your adorable. Will you go out with me?" without being too forward??

He is definitely feeding the crush. Bastard.

I wonder if I should go round the corner and see if Pliny is at the Betsey tonight, but that would be stalking, and that would be bad, and besides, I've procrasturbated the entire day away, and only finished one article out of four... D'oh!

!

You should stop posting now. You are never going to top that.

So I accosted him after class and he really couldn't have been less interested in me.

Damn. :(

I did get his email, though.

OK, flip the tables. Has anyone ever had any *good* random crush experiences? Has anyone actually approached their random crush and ended up with a good friend/associate/lover/whatever? Success stories?

The closest I had was the C6 experience, of crushing madly on them for ages, but then we ended up becoming friends, our bands played together, things like that. However, I don't see either of them any more. :-( I guess I used to see Ollie around because his band rehearsed at the same time mine did, but Dan has disappeared off the face of the earth.

(it originally got its name from a 17th-century school for the deaf which was built nearby)

I guess the old meaning of dumb (= mute) might be relevant

You are OTM.

::replaces mental image of Nings with quick slide show of Pliny, Cute Bartender and Coffeeshop Boy::

I am forever entertained by this bit of slang whenever it comes up.

"It's another lonely day in the streets of Dundee, and the hordes of Neds are gawkily moving along towards another bemusing Dundee vs. United clash.

'Uh, hi!'

'Hi, heh heh.'

'So what did you do?'

'I picked up another slew of CDs.'

'Hey, me too!'

'Isn't that great?'

The conversations along these lines continue for some time..."

she was a lovely brunnette. she is the ticket shredder at NFT-3. I'm going back there to watch more bergman movies. to get crushed on, of course.

''Sigh. I guess the random crush generator really is a way of avoiding actual relationships.''

for me it definetely is.

I hate when they *know* it. And then they sort of swagger past you with this air of "Yeah, I'm hot and I know it." Or maybe that's cute. I can't decide.

Do you think about your interactions with them afterwards, and turn them over in your mind trying to examine and analyse them? Or do you just forget about them until you're in the neighbourhood?

I'm convinced Pliny shot Ed a funny look as we left the other night, and I wanted to scream HE'S JUST MY HOUSEMATE, but then again, I'm sure I'm imagining things and projecting bigtime.

Still trying to work out if Pliny's *look* was a "Don't leave with her, she's CRAZY!" look, a "oh no, I thought she loved MEEEEE!" look or "I wish these fuXors would just leave already so I could lock up and go home" look.

that's terrible! what a turn off!!!! a crush killa!!!!!!!!

WORD, Di!

also, the girl who works the counter at the Tower Records world-music store; she's very short, has short, very dark, very curly hair (ROWR!), really young-looking (19-ish) but she has a ring on her engagement/marriage finger which is one deterrent (the other being she doesn't notice me at all; I'm of the mutual-attraction-or-bust school of would-be courtship). she is cute cute cute. I am smitten smitten smitten...and happy to leave it at that, really.

Which is more fulfilling on the oxytocin front, while better for avoiding hurt-potentiality?

Plus, there is a much higher quotient for rejection with supermarket crushes. With a celebrity, there is no chance that they will ever enter your life (OK, I'm living proof that this is a false assumption) so no chance for disappointment. Unless they release a bad album, or get married or fiddle with kiddies, or other guaranteed crushkillahs...

photographs=> real dud.

of course most of us know this but kinda coincidental.

no crushing on no one today. didn't get out of the house.

Etc. Of course I say nothing to him, go home, download pictures from the band's website, write a song about the unattainable crushness of it all, etc.

Then they come into town again, so of course I go see them. And there's this guy hanging around him suspiciously, and he's a bit too attractive now, and he's not as introverted and awkward on stage, and the magic is gone, and I realize that I -- you guessed it -- don't really care for their music after all.

Oh well!

(A couple of times they've even ended up approaching me after the set... cheek!)

Amazing how boys' bands sometimes stop sounding good when they stop being crushable.

Wooooo!!! Pliny is SO LOVELY. I went to the Arse Cafe to see The Telescopes and Pliny was still doing sound even though it wasn't a Tarkus and Fuxor night at all. He actually, like, said hello to me. Of his on volition and everything! Gosh, he's lovely. I had total a brain fart and could barely stutter to ask him how he was.

So I guess he would know me if he tripped over me. Literally. I made the mistake of sitting in front of the stage during the support bands, and he came over to change the mic stands, plonked himself directly in front of me and bent over, sticking his ASS in my face. Uuuuuhhhh. Is he TRYING to make me have a heart attack? And then he walked over me. Grinning and touching me on the shoulders and tripping over me. Why am I so lame and shy and can't actually talk to him like a normal human being instead of just grinning at him goofily and being unable to speak?

Twice I actually worked up my courage to make conversation with him, and the first time, these two BOYS kept trying to talk to me. (This is the disadvantage of being the only girl in the front row of a dronerock show.) And then after the show when I was going to go and say goodbye to him, this girl he works with came over and talked to him for ages. Sigh.

It's just fated not to be. And I accept that. It's better that way, it's just a silly crush for fun. I mean, he's probably married for all I know. But it's lovely and fun and squishy and makes me feel happy for a few hours, so it's a good thing, right?

I just need to go swoooooooooooooooooon.

Kate: what have you done to YOUR HAIR?!?!?
Pliny: Uh, it was a hassle, so zzzzzz ::makes buzzing motion::
Kate: But it was SO CUTE before!
Pliny (looking strangely crestfallen): it'll grow back...

::Kate realises how rude she's been and runs away::

I apologised a few minutes later. But I was shocked. He's still really lovely, but I just can't get used to the shaved head. It doesn't look right.

(I can't believe that Hilton just messaged me to remind me he was on the radio... and misspelled "masterbate". What a wierdoe.)

It's ruining my life. It's been almost 8 months now.

It's got to the stage where M is what I think about for 90% of the day. It gives me a headache. I can't sleep. I'm not even thinking about anything in particular, just about M.

M's there in my mind all the time. Even during a one month "separation". i.e. didn't see M over January.

Thing is: M is unavailable. If M were available I don't think I would seriously be interested.

I'm quite rational about this. I'm very fond of M and we get along really well. We are friends.

Really I just want to be friends. I think over and over that I should tell M of my fondness but with the assurance that it's just a friendship type fondness so not to misinterpret it - but let's be honest, that would be a bit of a lie so long as I am totally infatuated and obsessed.

Then I think I should confess all - but that is something that it's just SO wrong to do. I mean, this is all my shit. It's transference and obsession etc. that M has never instigated or encouraged and it's totally one way. To force any responsibility for it onto M is manipulation of the highest order.

It's not even really about M. It's about what M represents. Also, M is an excuse to not think about some of the things I prolly should be thinking about.

Anyway, any advice on how to get over it before I go crazy?

"

So here it is, the long-awaited and most definitive interview ever with Clint Conley.

The interview was done by none other than BurmaKitty and Lianna Ness in April of 1981. An unaware Clint
Conley was about to find two teenagers with nothing to do on April vacation, sitting on his porch when he
came home...from what I am not sure, and that didn't seem important at the time. They were just happy
Clint actually and really lived at the address that he unwittingly put in the upper left hand corner of a letter
he sent to answer BurmaKitty's fanmail that she sent to Ace of Hearts Records. If he ever thought of doing
that again, I am sure this cured him. "

the whole shebang:

http://missionofburma.com/bgu/original/clinterview/clinterview.html