The simple joy of stupid spam names

It was for 'Valium - Viagra - Xanax - Ambien - Zoloft - Ativan' -- I'm obviously making a big order for all of the above later today.

Emilia Eastman
Helen Steinle
Helen Villmer
Brad Neconie
Kirk Telaneus
Betsy Rossy
Allstott Aletha
Esther Tilly
Tomas Davis
Christopher Noble (how "noble" is it to be selling Phentermine, Viagra and Propecia?)

What name generator do they use and were Stephen Fry and Chris Morris consulted on the coding? Is it random syllables from the real name fields of bulletin board postings around the web?

I especially like Crofford Dunkle.

I'd also like to point out this latest sales 'trick':

From: knvienickdastoor
Subject: Re:Don't tell nickdastoor.Come see this site

Today's new addition ("Collect Huge With Our Trouble-Free Online Gambling"): Corolis Grantland.

hmmm -- Slavic-sounding first name, english-sounding last name.

could be a relative of mine!

Is that 'ch' as in 'Loch'?

Baseler Kudasik and Serres Blewitt.

I'm getting bored with this now.

What do you want it to do, make a citizen's arrest on the sender?

More generally, I think Bayesian filtering is the new thing. And I believe there is a beta version of a plugin called Spammunition that works with Outlook. See here for an approval.

then we remembered this thread: the WRONG HANDS!!

I got that too - but from Motter Jarreau.

I think Yahoo is getting smarter as these fellows are beginning to land in the Bulk folder with their alternative character-set brethren.

The end of an era.

Sosh Muckenthaler
Mostowy Deaderick

If I see Mossie, I must let him know Mucko's got this scam going.

VERY.

Absalom Bejar
William O. Riley
Eldon Biage
Luis Drurys
Diamond Jim

A chap called Nick keeps sending me mails about Viagara and other penile enhancement techniques. And I've received two mails from Saint Andrews, who are slyly trying to sell me a wedding.

"From : Saint Andrews
To :
Subject : Wedding

Dear Lara
You made an inquiry about a wedding at St Andrew's. Did you want to proceed with that wedding here?
Nick Spezer"

Now all I need to organise is a hairdresser, shoes and, oh yes, someone I'd like to share more than a couple of months of my life with!

Breach Mcredmond gives Elliston Deibert the cable filter info he requested and I somehow get in the way.

Today, Hank Deselm wrote to ask "What's Up?" and to see if I wanted to visit his webpage. Nice of him!

I am going to the town hall and changing my name to this right after work today.

You are definitely not worthy of the name Mostowy.

Autumn Minetola
Pansy Pearl
Gay Cross
Wang Gory
Perdy Mutia
Fred Wicaclya
Lacher Pulse
Funck Crayford (twice)

*weeps tears of shame*

Sheena Goncharenko
Tubbe Stok

This just in from "Benjamin Franklin", advertising an online casino.
Subject: "I was a dork and now I'm best friends with Benjamin Franklin"

Not a spam name, but some of these penis enlargement spam subject lines are getting pretty De Sadean.

Beat her womb with your giant!

there was a lovely one today promising an attached game of chasing angelina jolie's ass around hollywood.

Bonita Moon

sail down the love canal more confidently

Elvia Y. Jernigan tells me to "prepare your love wand for the next battle"

Barrister Jossip Welber

From Barrister Jossip Welber
Dear Friend,

My name is Barrister Jossip Welber, an Attorney at Law.

I am writing to notify you of the unclaimed inheritance deposit of our late client, Mr.Morris Thompson who passed on to the Great beyond 0n Tuesday,August 24, 2004 in the Siberia Airlines Tu-154 Crash.I got your name and email address through a web search engine in my quest to get a reliable individual who shall work with me in claiming this inheritance deposit since all efforts to get the biological relative has proved abortive.

Get back to me with your tel/fax numbers for more information on the amount of inheritance, procedure and legality of this claim via this email address jwelbe✧✧✧@a✧✧.c✧✧.

Regards,
Jossip Welber
Attorney At Law
Rrply to this email address: jwelbe✧✧✧@a✧✧.c✧✧

Gena Ponce is lonely and would like to chat with me tonite.

dsaf Ratikoski is bitching at me about not being able to get on the "f****ing bed."

Not a stupid name, but recent spam I've received has taken a trash-literary bent:

He dreamed of the piling, so real he felt he could almost reach out and slide his palm over its green-black fissured curve.

[blurb about some sex product deleted]

Outside he could hear the roaring sound of Annie's bright-blue riding lawnmower — she was around front, giving the grass a good trim so those cockadoodie Roydmans wouldn't have anything to talk about in town.
I don't kid myself that you'd care about getting another two people killed, if it would help you.
She studied his white, sweat-beaded face for a moment, then nodded and left the room.

Dr. Angus Basil

am getting lots of fake headlines as subject lines:

Raw footage of snake swallowing horse
Raging bull gores 3 in freak accident
Girl loses breasts in surgical disaster

all with links purporting to be videos of said accidents.

the link appears to say 'you must download video activex object to play this video file' after which i am sure much jollity ensues.

haha yeah my gmail spam folder is a constant source of entertainment

IBM to file for bankruptcy
Typhoon in Taiwan devastates city
Michelle Obama latest fashion disaster
Torture widespread in Palestinian jails
Facebook under attack by clones!!

It's like reading the Daily Mail!

Somebody calling themselves "Gay Funk" is clearly channelling Yoda with a spam e-mail titled "Be not afraid of making changes in your life"

"Arnold Bumptious Nguyen"

Attn: Winner,

You won the sum of $500,000.00 USD from our monthly sweepstakes. Your
email address was among the five lucky winner in our computer email
ballot,You are hereby advice to get back to us,to claim your prize.

CONTACT COURIER PROMOTION MANAGER WITH DETAILS BELOW;PPPAY COURIER UK
CORRESPONDENCE: Mr Mally Runk.

TEL : +44-701-113-3045

FAX : + 44 7 07 505 5654

E MAIL: mallyr✧✧✧@hotm✧✧✧.c✧✧

EMAIL:pppaycour✧✧✧@hotm✧✧✧.c✧✧

PLEASE NOTE: NON RESIDENTS OF THE UNITED KINGDOM ARE TO BEAR EXPENSES
FOR THIER COURIER DELIVERY.

Claims Requirements:

1.full name:

2.Home Address:

3.Age:

4.Sex:

5.Marital Status:

6.Phone Number:

7.Nationality :

8.Country Of Residence.

9. Occupation.
Regards,

Stella White

Kenneth Williams lives

Cher,
Nous vous saluons au nom du Dieu tout-puissant.
Mon nom est Kenneth Williams et ma soeur Juliet en provenance de la Sierra Leone. Nous vous écris de République de Côte d'Ivoire, où nous avons pris refuge après la guerre brutale et le meurtre de nos parents par les rebelles lors de la reprise des combats dans notre pays.
En raison de la guerre, notre regretté père a vendu sa compagnie de navigation et nous a emmenés à un pays voisin la Côte d'Ivoire, où il a déposé 18.000.000,00 millions de US $ dans son compte auprès d'un étranger de la banque ici en Côte d'Ivoire. En raison de la situation politique actuelle en Côte d'Ivoire, nous sommes à la recherche de votre aide pour transférer cet argent et aussi déménager dans votre pays afin d'approfondir notre étude et nous sommes disposés à vous offrir 15% de la somme totale pour votre aide, mais nous pensons que vous ne pourrez pas faire partie de ce l'argent lorsque la banque d'ici le transfert de votre compte, nous attendons vos réponses, nous allons vous donner plus d'informations sur le transfert.
Cordialement,
Kenneth & Juliet Williams.

Arbuckle Pegelow
Louise Wang
Freeman Mayo
Giovanni Bruce (I imagine that he's a flamboyant Australian fashion designer)

Cedric Dillard

Jessica Simpson recently sent me a very intriguing missive about the English National Lottery. I am American.

Just got the greatest sender/subject line combo ever:

"Secure State of the Art SSL Encryption"

sent to me by

"Sex Sexual"

"Jaw dropping, thong dropping monster."

Dr Sambo Whitehead

Bellyngton Sweetecok, and it's not pR0n spam

I wonder if Playboy Bloodbath is still sending email?

Charley Horton and Rosanne Cabrera both sound as if they could be names of local city council members. But they aren't.

Hetty Osborne and Odette Costello are tempting me with share advice.

kurtcobain.seomanager at gmail.com

Ok Higman

Puffin Daniel

Sex Sexual wasn't a mid 80s Prince alter ego?
.

i have a skype acct for work

an individual named berry.wetquirtz7 just asked me to add them

Cookie Scampoli - impotency will never come back into your life

Genevieve Kropotkin

dying at these

just received an urgent email about an unpaid invoice from Karla Winstanley

Chad Bogan

:D

Brit Method

Sergeant. Alvina Snelson.

Dicky Scarwin

The greatest spam email I've ever received:

From: steveng [mailto:steveng @ 14zero.pl]

Subject: Hi there steveng

Elvet Bridge is now largely pedestrianised. June 3, 1894, p. I cannot betray that trust.

Notes:

• I am also a Steven G, but not @14zero.pl
• Elvet Bridge exists, and in fact has been largely pedestrianised
• I can't find anything of interest that happened on June 3, 1894
• What does the ", p." bit mean?
• By posting this, I've probably betrayed that trust

B. Drinicky Bangg

Ethel Barnes
Your personal curator

Mrs. Gezerias Bell

Sharon Fencil

Smarta Femming

Mandalina Hataway

Billy Oceak