Women who prefer male friends

OK, I admit, much of my friends are male, and its pretty well known amongst my associates that I have this "I dont trust many women" attitude. But I dont apply that to everyone as a blanket thing.

Its just... yeah, I prefer guy friends (with a small handful of exceptions). To answer Nick's "why", in my case (and I have thought about why a lot) it is twofold: mainly, I had 2 brothers and no sisters. Grew up around lots of younger guys. Always thought it was more fun running around, climbing trees and dismantling things than sitting aroung gossiping about things in Smash Hits (tho I did that too!). The second reason which may be more of an excuse, is that all bar maybe 2 girls I went to school with treated me like shit. And my best friend, and several female friends since, have betrayed me in equally heinous ways (trying to appropriate friends and boyfriends, getting you to spill your guts over something personal and then going and blabbing about it to all and sundry, etc)

While I totally agree its not just guys, unfortunately I'm in the situation where the worst kicks in the face Ive had have been from girls, rarely from guys.

Having said all that it isnt WHY I prefer male friends. I just happen to think guys are all gorgeous and adorable :)

*shudder*

I really dislike the idea of "sisterhood," "female solidarity," etc. That I'm supposed to support and stick up for my fellow chixors just because we share some anatomy and a history of oppression (yawn, everyone in the world is "oppressed" these days). I hardly ever feel like I have anything in common with other women -- this isn't true ALL of the time, but most of the time it is. I relate to men better. And I especially hate the clucking-hen kaffeeklatsches that form when "we women gotta stick together" against some evil (usu. a female they find disagreeable).

Hmm maybe thats weirder than I realised.

In fact, the whole mythology around the woman who 'only associates with men' seems kind of like a sexist stereotype. Women or men who claim they are like this or know people like this seem to be confusing the empty trappings of picturesque rebellion with the gentler truth of moral antinomianism.

My girlfriend has many more male friends than female friends, but her two closest friends besides me are female. This could possibly be explained by the fact that she went to a private primary school which had a 4:1 ratio of boys to girls, but interestingly she made more male friends in secondary school. She can't really give a conscious explanation for this.

I worry in general when people's friends are not a mixed bag and do ask myself whether a particular choice of friends by an individual is perhaps an outward manifestation of certain anxieties. My answer to this vexing question is usually yes.

However I love the HOT LADIEEZZ as well cause I can squeeze their titties. This is a good thing. Trust me I KNOW!! heh.

I don't see females as competition at all, but I don't have very "girly" female friends because I tend not to have anything in common with them. I am certainly not a flirtatious, like-to-be-surrounded-by-male-attention type, and generally my friends treat me as a person first and a gender second, which is how I treat them.

I have just have friends, and it so happens that more of them are guys. Ho hum. No generalisations, no rhyme or reason, just that of the people I have come into contact with over the years, more of the ones I like best, have stuff in common with, and that have stuck around, tend to be male.

I have just have friends

(The word chiX0r should be used more round these parts)

a couple of people mentioned upthread something along the lines of it's worse to be fucked over by your women friends, because usually you share more emotionally intimate moments/details with them, more of the time, than with your boyfriends/male friends. (i appreciate this won't be true for some women, but it has been for me.) i've had 3 or 4 quite intense female friendships through my late teens/20s which have all ended badly, for reasons which were, at the time, unfathomable to me.

basically i've never been hurt, dumped or rejected by a man, but i have been by several women. with all the will in the world i wish i could just say "oh, but i can't make generalisations"....but frankly, sometimes a person will be so psychologically affected by repeated experiences that they instinctively avoid getting into those situations again. i've reached that stage now. i badly feel the want of female friends, but i'm just not prepared to go through the same shit again. my feeling now is that i just want to "keep it light", and i find it's much easier to do this with men.

having said that, i've always felt more comfortable in the company of men, generally, and never really been able to pinpoint why. from an early age i always felt i had more of a masculine sensibility...very difficult to explain, but i'm sure this attribute (failing?) in itself has had a lot to do with why my female friendships have ended so badly.

Most of my friends are male. And they've all got girlfriends. I feel like their girlfriends are their real lives (ok, in a couple of cases those gf's are actually wives). Not that I'm jealous - obviously I have a boyfriend and we spend lots of time together. But anyway, usually I can only see those girlfriends in the context of hanging out with their boyfriends too. It's kind of hard to break out of that routine and develope something more intimate.

I had a girls' night with my mom last night. We watched Sex & Lucia and ate chocolate. And she went on my daily neighborhood walk with me. So that was fun.

This may be a lie.

You don't say...

*der der der der der*

Andrew - for him it seems to be mid- to late-twenties. But he's also fairly challenged socially (he likley has Aspergers Syndrome) - but I have been wondering about older people - I mean, my parents/step-parents don't seem to have close friendships any more. (And I am all for "coupling-up," so long as it's not expected of me *grin*)

I have trust issues. :)

Likewise I find that the sexist-pig stereotype of men (walking around going "would you do her'? type of stuff) is more applicable to my female friends.

haha xpost hugs isn't a euphemism for friendly sexing.

Preferably ones that are willing to hug and/or snog me.

(x-post)

No, I've only had sex with 3 or 4 of my friends, and never once we've become close friends.

(x-post)

i love making-out (both as a term and an action)

(x-post to Ken)

Taking Sides: Snogging vs. Making Out

Five years ago, I had a lot of folks I considered serious “I’ll always know you” friends, maybe 25; today that number is closer to 8, with only 3-5 of those being people I really expect to be keeping in touch with in another five years. One lives nearby, but the others are scattered all over the place: California, Ohio, Sri Lanka, Texas, Philly. Thank God for email, no-one ever calls me (and when I call – I make like 7 friend calls per year at this point -- it’s a bad time or homies ain’t home).

The female friends my wife has made over the last couple years have been work friends who came to be very important to her but (a) started spreading private stuff around or (b) stopped answering calls after she left one job or another.

This year I'm going to start writing letters again; email is convenient, but it doesn’t carry the weight of permanence paper does, you know?

Isn't that generally the way of things though? I think the older we get, the less really good friends we have (of either sex). My social circle was much bigger back in the University days, but people grow up, move away, get married, and have so much else to do in their busy busy lives that friendships often fall by the wayside, albeit involuntarily sometimes.