wiewuuhreifijdnk dieidkeke fdihteooirnklgnklbsdgs qrwewrtwre gfuieikdkdkjvknhfadsjiogdsojkgrsjkl

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I've just received an email with this as the body text.

Is it written in a discernable language/code? What do you expect it means?

― Lara (Lara), Monday, 4 August 2003 18:43 (twenty-two years ago)

probably am international font that your comp couldnt decipher

― chaki (chaki), Monday, 4 August 2003 18:52 (twenty-two years ago)

Couldn't it (maybe, maybe) be something more interesting than that?

― Lara (Lara), Monday, 4 August 2003 18:55 (twenty-two years ago)

It's a message from the Planet Xerfwerf asking you to be their Mushroom Queen.

― oops (Oops), Monday, 4 August 2003 18:56 (twenty-two years ago)

Or Mike Hanle y is speaking to you.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Monday, 4 August 2003 18:57 (twenty-two years ago)

Oh fuck, trust my luck, I hate mushrooms.

― Lara (Lara), Monday, 4 August 2003 18:57 (twenty-two years ago)

I just tried to add you as a Friendster friend, Lara (you don't have to approve me, though I wouldn't mind knowing if the request went through). It was doing something weird when I tried, but I don't think that would've caused a nonsense email to go out. I was going to say that was a new spam name for someone from Nigeria who wants to deposit $30 million dollars into your account, then I realized that might not sound too good. Um… RATS.

― Bryan (Bryan), Monday, 4 August 2003 18:58 (twenty-two years ago)

You obviously have never had Xerfwerfian shrooms then.

― oops (Oops), Monday, 4 August 2003 18:59 (twenty-two years ago)

It's the meaning of life, a la the film Pi. Govt agents will be looking for you soon. Trust no one. Seriously.

― Aaron W (Aaron W), Monday, 4 August 2003 18:59 (twenty-two years ago)

Clearly it means utudgwdcvj2dkj2qbx;.lqw.

― luna (luna.c), Monday, 4 August 2003 19:01 (twenty-two years ago)

Shit best offer of my life (Mushroom Queen would have to have special shoes, right?) and I can't take it up and I'll be on the run by Wednesday. Arse tits wank.

― Lara (Lara), Monday, 4 August 2003 19:01 (twenty-two years ago)

Bryan:Friendster - Its the new thing

― Lara (Lara), Monday, 4 August 2003 19:02 (twenty-two years ago)

Easy. There's every letter of the alphabet in there except for c, m, p, x, y and z. It's a reverse anagram. The mail wants to warn you of an evil supermonkey, the X-CZYMP.

― Turingmute (Wintermute), Monday, 4 August 2003 19:07 (twenty-two years ago)

How can I protect myself from this Robo-chimp?

― Lara (Lara), Monday, 4 August 2003 19:09 (twenty-two years ago)

Could be a semi-subliminal message that you won 10 million quid.....then I realised you wouldn't be able to read it. It's prolly hydroglyphical code for a love-letter from a secret admirer.

― Nichole Graham (Nichole Graham), Monday, 4 August 2003 19:09 (twenty-two years ago)

I'm pretty sure I deciphered that last word: supercalifragilisticexpialidocius

― oops (Oops), Monday, 4 August 2003 19:11 (twenty-two years ago)

How can I protect myself from this Robo-chimp?

wear a ben affleck mask, hes the ultimate alpha male chimp commander, or commando even, yep commando is cooler, anyway if they though you were him, they'd become your servants.

― Bob Shaw (Bob Shaw), Monday, 4 August 2003 19:12 (twenty-two years ago)

Nichole, for being clever and stupid all at once, I will spend some of my ill-gotten millions on you. You can have a magazine and chocolate bar of your choice.

― Lara (Lara), Monday, 4 August 2003 19:12 (twenty-two years ago)

I bet the chimp would get it on with BA and they would come after me together. I could pelt them with mushrooms but could I keep them off forever?

― Lara (Lara), Monday, 4 August 2003 19:14 (twenty-two years ago)

hand over some of the ill gotten millions, and I'll help

― luna (luna.c), Monday, 4 August 2003 19:15 (twenty-two years ago)

*slaps down a wad*

― Lara (Lara), Monday, 4 August 2003 19:19 (twenty-two years ago)

on first glance I thought it was dutch!

― g--ff c-nn-n (gcannon), Monday, 4 August 2003 19:23 (twenty-two years ago)

Any daffodil eaters on-line to confirm?

― Lara (Lara), Monday, 4 August 2003 19:24 (twenty-two years ago)

I bet the chimp would get it on with BA and they would come after me together. I could pelt them with mushrooms but could I keep them off forever?

I could see this as a movie scenario...but would it be worse or better than Gigli? At least the chimp would be classic.

― j.lu (j.lu), Monday, 4 August 2003 19:29 (twenty-two years ago)

As would I in my shroom-shoes, non?

― Lara (Lara), Monday, 4 August 2003 19:33 (twenty-two years ago)

I could see this as a movie scenario...but would it be worse or better than Gigli? At least the chimp would be classic.

yeah, it'd be like "every which way but loose" for the "entertainment tonight" generation

(every which way but loose is classic, the critics are very wrong)

― Bob Shaw (Bob Shaw), Monday, 4 August 2003 19:33 (twenty-two years ago)

Are there degrees of wrongness, Bob?

― Lara (Lara), Monday, 4 August 2003 19:34 (twenty-two years ago)

Right turn, Clyde.

― luna (luna.c), Monday, 4 August 2003 19:35 (twenty-two years ago)

Bonnie, em.

― Lara (Lara), Monday, 4 August 2003 19:36 (twenty-two years ago)

Yes there are Lara. I have a doctorate.

― oops (Oops), Monday, 4 August 2003 19:36 (twenty-two years ago)

I have a doctorate too. Do we swap stuff next?

― Lara (Lara), Monday, 4 August 2003 19:36 (twenty-two years ago)

there are degrees of wrongness, some people are wrong in that they have thought incorrectly, others are just wrong because they are fools who hate "every which way but loose"

― Bob Shaw (Bob Shaw), Monday, 4 August 2003 19:42 (twenty-two years ago)

That distinguishes different types rather than saying one is worse than the other.

(TO SELF - I AM NOT HAVING THIS CONVERSATION. STOP WITH THE FINE PHILOSOPHICAL DISTINCTIONS ALREADY!)

― Lara (Lara), Monday, 4 August 2003 19:47 (twenty-two years ago)

ilx has gone crazy tonight. do you think its the london heatwave?

― Bob Shaw (Bob Shaw), Monday, 4 August 2003 19:52 (twenty-two years ago)

I'm not in London. Should I be scared?

― Lara (Lara), Monday, 4 August 2003 19:58 (twenty-two years ago)

id be more scared by the chimps at the window.

― Bob Shaw (Bob Shaw), Monday, 4 August 2003 20:01 (twenty-two years ago)

FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCK!!!!!

― Lara (Lara), Monday, 4 August 2003 20:03 (twenty-two years ago)

can i also use this thread to clear something up... what the hell is a FAP. ive been wondering this since i joined up to ilx a few months back. Friendly Asian Pimpin'? Fully Anal Pornshoot? I need to know which one!

― Bob Shaw (Bob Shaw), Monday, 4 August 2003 20:06 (twenty-two years ago)

Disappointingly: Fancy a Pint.

― Lara (Lara), Monday, 4 August 2003 20:07 (twenty-two years ago)

Fuck at Pub

(xp, rats!)

― oops (Oops), Monday, 4 August 2003 20:08 (twenty-two years ago)

Balls. I have ruined everything.

― Lara (Lara), Monday, 4 August 2003 20:09 (twenty-two years ago)

i think im gonna stick with my own definitions. if i ever turn up to one, at least we'll have astroglide thanks to me

― Bob Shaw (Bob Shaw), Monday, 4 August 2003 20:12 (twenty-two years ago)

Nichole, for being clever and stupid all at once, I will spend some of my ill-gotten millions on you. You can have a magazine and chocolate bar of your choice.

I'll take 3 million, and buy myself a chocolate mansion.

Bob: FAP: Friggin' 'Appy People (esp. after a few drinks....)

― Nichole Graham (Nichole Graham), Monday, 4 August 2003 20:14 (twenty-two years ago)

FAFAP?

― Lara (Lara), Monday, 4 August 2003 20:14 (twenty-two years ago)

if i ever turn up to one, at least we'll have astroglide thanks to me

And the vibrator, whips and digital camera (for those lovely, incriminating pictures afterward)

― Nichole Graham (Nichole Graham), Monday, 4 August 2003 20:16 (twenty-two years ago)

So that's what he has in his other hand!

― Lara (Lara), Monday, 4 August 2003 20:18 (twenty-two years ago)

anyone fancy a little ky-wrestling get-together soon? would that still be classed as a fap?

― Bob Shaw (Bob Shaw), Monday, 4 August 2003 20:20 (twenty-two years ago)

I expect it's announcing a new Aphex Twin album (the e-mail that is).

― o. nate (onate), Monday, 4 August 2003 20:21 (twenty-two years ago)

Yer man with the hair out of them looks like a chimp, actually.

― Lara (Lara), Monday, 4 August 2003 20:22 (twenty-two years ago)

Damn, I'm thinking about the Chemicals but TAT looks like a monkey too and there's something shroomy about his nose. ARE WE ON TO SOMETHING?

― Lara (Lara), Monday, 4 August 2003 20:24 (twenty-two years ago)

Hrmmm...do any of the Aphex Twin or Chemical Bros.'s albums harmonize curiously well with Any Which Way But Loose?

― j.lu (j.lu), Monday, 4 August 2003 20:47 (twenty-two years ago)

if you drop the needle on Druqks right when Clyde makes his first appearance, it results in all these spooky coincidences--like during "Kladfvgbung Micshk," Phil and Orville are actually Kladfvgbung Micshking!

― teeny (teeny), Monday, 4 August 2003 20:53 (twenty-two years ago)

hehe. shit i gotta try this while stoned. i dont have druqks though. i'll just use one of my Dead recordings

― Bob Shaw (Bob Shaw), Monday, 4 August 2003 20:56 (twenty-two years ago)

Apparently Matthew Broderick is involved in this X-Chimp business:

http://ibelgique.ifrance.com/cinedestin/films/p/pr/projectxtopsecret.jpg

― Sommermute (Wintermute), Monday, 4 August 2003 22:05 (twenty-two years ago)

laskdfhkasdj ?

― Mike Hanle y (mike), Tuesday, 5 August 2003 12:17 (twenty-two years ago)

Ew, MB looks like he's about to engage in Illicit Monkey Love(TM).

― Dan Perry (Dan Perry), Tuesday, 5 August 2003 12:18 (twenty-two years ago)

ah, lara, did you get that email from me the other week (it was written in english, not lksdj;fie-ian)?

― CarsmileSteve (CarsmileSteve), Tuesday, 5 August 2003 12:22 (twenty-two years ago)

No and I have never sent you a text messeage. EVER.

― Lara (Lara), Tuesday, 5 August 2003 20:05 (twenty-two years ago)

aha, things start to make sense...

― CarsmileSteve (CarsmileSteve), Tuesday, 5 August 2003 22:25 (twenty-two years ago)

"Sorry, Mario! your Mushroom Queen is in another castle."

"well then, fuck you, Toad. I'm going home to have a beer."

― Kingfish (Kingfish), Tuesday, 5 August 2003 23:37 (twenty-two years ago)

TRMLLAR (10:00:05 PM): lkdfngldfgirnlg.
Garance80 (10:00:19 PM): hioasoigfheoikjng??!
TRMLLAR (10:00:36 PM): wertjnk, oierjgoogspenr >:O
Garance80 (10:00:52 PM): uionknball--adkghoih alghoiqjoih g;lkfdyhoi hik :-*
TRMLLAR (10:01:00 PM): sdpognwwk
Garance80 (10:01:10 PM): mikjhoic?
TRMLLAR (10:01:12 PM): lkgidns, webf sdfojnkak pothrr99s n
TRMLLAR (10:01:25 PM): trthpasjdnk pdogfjkne podfgs4nt3 podgf
TRMLLAR (10:01:35 PM): wfekjn WTF?!
Garance80 (10:01:39 PM): yuoibnkjnb liadusfio aisiul qoihrtp; andi!
Garance80 (10:01:42 PM): soifdgjgf hahahahaha.
TRMLLAR (10:01:56 PM): why is this so much fun we're retarded
TRMLLAR (10:02:17 PM): anyway 5pypds pdgkf
Garance80 (10:02:19 PM): yeah we are the most retarded people alive
Garance80 (10:02:24 PM): hahahahahahahahaha
Garance80 (10:02:31 PM): jkl oiyrtionb yhfn
TRMLLAR (10:02:46 PM): ...klmrg
Garance80 (10:03:01 PM): hmmm dkfljhio qopld
TRMLLAR (10:03:06 PM): erbkj pogfhd kwberj 345jio gfdpo werjnk opfgd4lkr fgdp9pt bskuefr
TRMLLAR (10:03:19 PM): like lk45n pbdf 2rjk3n dude
Garance80 (10:03:22 PM): pung a;dluieopj ;dfkljhaioq
Garance80 (10:03:27 PM): j;dgfihw jgkl;faoighaphq0 a0983h ;akjfdnd;laygpos
Garance80 (10:03:29 PM): kljdfn
TRMLLAR (10:03:37 PM): 34njkt pdgf90 d/f...EHRT
TRMLLAR (10:03:43 PM): EW%Y!!
Garance80 (10:04:03 PM): ++++*&#(^*HGFD:&%#)(Q#&%_)_)uy
TRMLLAR (10:04:12 PM): =-O

― Millar (Millar), Wednesday, 6 August 2003 01:06 (twenty-two years ago)

We are the coolest people alive.

― Ally (mlescaut), Wednesday, 6 August 2003 01:08 (twenty-two years ago)

TRMLLAR (10:02:17 PM): anyway 5pypds pdgkf

best line.

― Kingfish (Kingfish), Wednesday, 6 August 2003 03:50 (twenty-two years ago)

TRMLLAR (10:03:43 PM): EW%Y!!
Garance80 (10:04:03 PM): ++++*&#(^*HGFD:&%#)(Q#&%_)_)uy

Is that what the kids call it these days!?

― j.lu (j.lu), Wednesday, 6 August 2003 04:29 (twenty-two years ago)

Only the cool ones. Or the drunk ones?

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Wednesday, 6 August 2003 04:34 (twenty-two years ago)

I know you guys were talking about me.

― oops is high (Oops), Wednesday, 6 August 2003 06:04 (twenty-two years ago)

EW%Y!!

there is something like this crawling across my desk right now

― peter james, Wednesday, 6 August 2003 07:15 (twenty-two years ago)

Garance80 (10:01:39 PM): yuoibnkjnb liadusfio aisiul qoihrtp; andi!

Ha!

― Andrew Farrell (afarrell), Wednesday, 6 August 2003 07:43 (twenty-two years ago)

Wow. It's giving me sick pleasure that you all are dissecting what amounts to me and Tom slamming our hands open-fisted against our keyboards for ten minutes.

― Ally (mlescaut), Wednesday, 6 August 2003 12:51 (twenty-two years ago)

And here I was thinking you really meant all that stuff

― Millar (Millar), Wednesday, 6 August 2003 20:21 (twenty-two years ago)

we could do with a best monkey movies thread

― Bob Shaw (Bob Shaw), Wednesday, 6 August 2003 21:09 (twenty-two years ago)

I meant the part where I said "pung a;dluieopj ;dfkljhaioq", that was actually from the heart. The rest of it was all work-related bullshit.

― Ally (mlescaut), Thursday, 7 August 2003 01:36 (twenty-two years ago)

oh, you say that now, but you'll probably be singing a differnt tune tomorrow.

and that toon will probably be "adsil;n jkl;mndc dkmdsvcvoplvc gfrewt./ 56vcb45gt wfd", or something thereabouts.

― Kingfish (Kingfish), Thursday, 7 August 2003 03:09 (twenty-two years ago)

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