Talk Me Out of Eating A Dozen Donuts

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Or not. In between writing the title (and getting the idea that I could all the donuts in the office while everybody else is out having a chummy lunch, the fuckers) I took a phone call that pissed me off.

― Huckleberry Mann (Horace Mann), Friday, 19 December 2003 18:14 (twenty-one years ago)

Mmmm doughnuts, maybe I should walk to Krispy Kreme in Harrods tomorrow.

― Ed (dali), Friday, 19 December 2003 18:18 (twenty-one years ago)

It's winter, you could use a few more pounds.

― Casuistry (Chris P), Friday, 19 December 2003 18:19 (twenty-one years ago)

Heh, newfound bad mood just makes me want to eat MORE donuts! Heh.

― Huckleberry Mann (Horace Mann), Friday, 19 December 2003 18:19 (twenty-one years ago)

just have sex with all the donuts and put them back.
watch your coworkers eat them, smiling on the inside.
it's killing 2 birds with one stone, really.

― dyson (dyson), Friday, 19 December 2003 18:19 (twenty-one years ago)

I used to think that fresh hot original glazed from Krispy Kreme were better than sex. I would get a dozen of them and eat the whole box with a fork. I miss college.

― TOMBOT, Friday, 19 December 2003 18:19 (twenty-one years ago)

Because Krispy Kreme is so new to the UK they give a free one to eat in the queue.

― Ed (dali), Friday, 19 December 2003 18:20 (twenty-one years ago)

Though consider: I just ate a plateful of freshly baked cinnamon rolls

― Casuistry (Chris P), Friday, 19 December 2003 18:22 (twenty-one years ago)

Doughnuts make me puke like a motherfucker. So think about doughnut regurgitation and you are sure to lose your appetite, trust me.

― Allyzay, Friday, 19 December 2003 18:23 (twenty-one years ago)

Cos you'll get fat and no one will want to touch your bum again. There.

― C-Man (C-Man), Friday, 19 December 2003 18:24 (twenty-one years ago)

eeew, cinnamon rolls makes me think of something else now, thanx to ilx.
eeeeeeeewww.

x-post

― dyson (dyson), Friday, 19 December 2003 18:24 (twenty-one years ago)

PIGFUCKER XXXXXXXXXXXXX COCKFIRE #$^$%^&$@#$@$^%!@##$

There are no Krispy Kreme franchises in Washington DC. I hate my life it is a joyless wasteland.

― TOMBOT, Friday, 19 December 2003 18:26 (twenty-one years ago)

I'm on #3

― Huckleberry Mann (Horace Mann), Friday, 19 December 2003 18:28 (twenty-one years ago)

Good lord, there's a Krispy Kreme in penn station, do you want me to pick you up some on the way to DC? I mean, honestly, "cockfire"?!

― Allyzay, Friday, 19 December 2003 18:29 (twenty-one years ago)

Donuts are deep-fried angels.

― Jeanne Fury (Jeanne Fury), Friday, 19 December 2003 18:30 (twenty-one years ago)

I'm on #3
ha ha, literally¿

― dyson (dyson), Friday, 19 December 2003 18:31 (twenty-one years ago)

Is there a way to be figuratively on #3?

― Casuistry (Chris P), Friday, 19 December 2003 18:32 (twenty-one years ago)

huh?

anyway, up to 4 now. belly not feeling too good, but whatever. I like a good barf as much as anyone. must get more coffee though.

― Huckleberry Mann (Horace Mann), Friday, 19 December 2003 18:32 (twenty-one years ago)

You are totally going to be sorry you did this.

― Allyzay, Friday, 19 December 2003 18:33 (twenty-one years ago)

i'm just excited that he may actually be taking my advice.

are they timmies donuts, btw¿
if they are the chocolate glazed are hawt¡

― dyson (dyson), Friday, 19 December 2003 18:33 (twenty-one years ago)

Barf back into the donut box, then leave a little post-in note saying "I swear I didn't touch them! --Huck xoxo."

― Casuistry (Chris P), Friday, 19 December 2003 18:34 (twenty-one years ago)

But wouldn't barfing up donuts make you NOT want to eat them for a very long time? That's un-fun.

― Jeanne Fury (Jeanne Fury), Friday, 19 December 2003 18:34 (twenty-one years ago)

coffee will only take-up much needed donut space.

― dyson (dyson), Friday, 19 December 2003 18:34 (twenty-one years ago)

Tom & Ally - there is also a 24-hour Krispy Kreme in Richmond. Now we know where the afterparty will be.

― NA (Nick A.), Friday, 19 December 2003 18:35 (twenty-one years ago)

rbn's, ass'ted
mowf fuh
cakey wubmah
ooh

― Huckleberry Mann (Horace Mann), Friday, 19 December 2003 18:35 (twenty-one years ago)

DONUT BITCH WHAT HAVE YOU DONE????

― Dan Perry (Dan Perry), Friday, 19 December 2003 18:37 (twenty-one years ago)

This is a science project, isn't it?

― El Diablo Robotico (Nicole), Friday, 19 December 2003 18:38 (twenty-one years ago)

it is--urrrrrrrrrp!--now.

― Huckleberry Mann (Horace Mann), Friday, 19 December 2003 18:40 (twenty-one years ago)

My friend whose family is from Chicago always says "doe-nitz". This is crazy talk.

― Spencer Chow (spencermfi), Friday, 19 December 2003 18:45 (twenty-one years ago)

oooooo, room spinning. four more to go. must soldier on.

― Huckleberry Mann (Horace Mann), Friday, 19 December 2003 18:46 (twenty-one years ago)

Doughnuts just remind me of church. Why do people like them?

Ally, is this some kind of universal Catholic thing? Is Krispy Kreme the fault of Sunday-donut-forbidding Protestant mommies or something?

― Ann Sterzinger (Ann Sterzinger), Friday, 19 December 2003 18:54 (twenty-one years ago)

My pants have never felt so tight. I'm like Jim Morrison on the day after Thanksgiving!

― Huckleberry Mann (Horace Mann), Friday, 19 December 2003 18:56 (twenty-one years ago)

WHAT THE HELL IS POSSESSING YOU TO DO THIS????? I DO NOT ENJOY DOUGHNUTS THUS FEEL VAGUE ENVY PIERCED BY THOROUGHGOING DISGUST!!!!!!!

Not to mention confusion. I mean, the fuck-the-donuts-and-put-em-back suggestion sounded like a wonderful idea, why would you reject it?

― Ann Sterzinger (Ann Sterzinger), Friday, 19 December 2003 19:06 (twenty-one years ago)

If you'd fucked the donuts, you could have taken a digital pic of yourself as you violated them and then forwarded to people as picture mail in a zany, madcap takeoff of those T-Mobile ads.

― Dan Perry (Dan Perry), Friday, 19 December 2003 19:07 (twenty-one years ago)

you're right. I'm only punishing myself.

― Huckleberry Mann (Horace Mann), Friday, 19 December 2003 19:07 (twenty-one years ago)

well? did you do it?

― luna (luna.c), Friday, 19 December 2003 19:08 (twenty-one years ago)

WTF is wrong with you people? Krispy Kreme donuts are SO GOOD!! They're not even really heavy, you can eat a whole box in one sitting and not even feel that sluggish!! I used to do it all the time when there was one near me! You are all SPACE ALIENS FROM HELL and I claim my $5.

Also the coffee at Krispy Kreme is excellent. Why oh why did I move to a Dunkin part of the country? No Krispy Kreme, no Sonic Drive-Thru, and no In-N-Out Burger. Washington DC can go fuck itself, god.

― TOMBOT, Friday, 19 December 2003 19:11 (twenty-one years ago)

I got to ten. The fuckers are back from lunch. And I'm feeling not so hot.

― Huckleberry Mann (Horace Mann), Friday, 19 December 2003 19:12 (twenty-one years ago)

How in the FUCK are they not heavy? Doughnuts make me PUKE MY FACE OFF. I'm sorry that this is a BIG HUGE ANOMOLY MAKING ME A FREAK. Jesus christ, guess who is NOT getting fucking Krispy Kremes NOW.

Ugh even thinking about ten doughnuts makes me want to throw up. Seriously, I salute you, Horace. I miss doughnuts sometimes.

― Allyzay, Friday, 19 December 2003 19:15 (twenty-one years ago)

I applaud your efforts nevertheless. I can't get past about 4 before the sugar fairy wallops me in the head with 'ooooh I've just eaten enough sugar to power a smalltowninNewHampshireIthinkI'llgorunamileandthendosomejumpingjackshey,Ineedazzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz', so I'm duly impressed.

― luna (luna.c), Friday, 19 December 2003 19:15 (twenty-one years ago)

There's a Krispy Kreme at Union Station, Tom. Used to go there when I worked across the Street from where you do now.

― Colin Meeder (Mert), Friday, 19 December 2003 19:16 (twenty-one years ago)

Dude, you colon is seriously going to fall out.

― Dan Perry (Dan Perry), Friday, 19 December 2003 19:17 (twenty-one years ago)

And here I thought I was in for just another dull weekend at home!

When I was in high school, we (the gang) used to sometimes go buy big bags of day olds and have races.

― Huckleberry Mann (Horace Mann), Friday, 19 December 2003 19:18 (twenty-one years ago)

Why oh why did I move to a Dunkin part of the country? No Krispy Kreme, no Sonic Drive-Thru, and no In-N-Out Burger. Washington DC can go fuck itself, god.

Krispy Kreme is coming to Dupont Circle, and they're already on Rt. 1 just down from Alexandria. And we don't need no steenkin' In-N-Out Burger; check out Five Guys.

― j.lu (j.lu), Friday, 19 December 2003 19:23 (twenty-one years ago)

In Union station? I had somehow not noticed it before, that's strange. Anyway I don't work there YET, they have to finish staring at my paperwork and slowly walking hard copies back and forth across the hall or whatever they do that takes so damn long to figure out that I am cleared to know BIG FANCY SECRETS.

The Krispy Kreme website acknowledged no such franchise in the train station though, that's odd and disappointing. However the result is that I have given the word "COCKFIRE" to this world and that is kind of awesome.

― TOMBOT, Friday, 19 December 2003 19:24 (twenty-one years ago)

Everyone needs In 'n Out. Everyone.

Also, I just said cockfire, and it was well-received. Thank you, Tom.

― luna (luna.c), Friday, 19 December 2003 19:27 (twenty-one years ago)

My friend whose family is from Chicago always says "doe-nitz". This is crazy talk.

It's just a regional thing. When my Chicago relatives say "pop," it always takes me a second or so to member that they mean soda. I suppose that's a positive thing, that in spite of Clear Channel and McDonalds and other national homogenizing forces, there are still some regional cultures out there.

― j.lu (j.lu), Friday, 19 December 2003 19:29 (twenty-one years ago)

It's kind of second in my heart to "pocky cock" to be honest but "cockfire" is pretty good.

― Allyzay, Friday, 19 December 2003 19:30 (twenty-one years ago)

When I was in high school, we (the gang) used to sometimes go buy big bags of day olds and have races.

not only is that very gross, huck - it is also considerably sad.

― dyson (dyson), Friday, 19 December 2003 19:32 (twenty-one years ago)

I've heard much grosser. Spinktor to thread immediately.

― Allyzay, Friday, 19 December 2003 19:33 (twenty-one years ago)

Skipping 254 messages at this point... Click here if you want to load them all.

What is what?

― oops (Oops), Wednesday, 24 December 2003 02:55 (twenty-one years ago)

The picture.

― Aja (aja), Wednesday, 24 December 2003 02:56 (twenty-one years ago)

Oh that.

― oops (Oops), Wednesday, 24 December 2003 02:57 (twenty-one years ago)

Who's on first?

― oops (Oops), Wednesday, 24 December 2003 02:57 (twenty-one years ago)

Well what is the picture of?

― Aja (aja), Wednesday, 24 December 2003 02:58 (twenty-one years ago)

The 5th Dimension.
If you right click on a picture and look at its Properties, it oftentimes gives you a clue as to the nature of it.

― oops (Oops), Wednesday, 24 December 2003 02:59 (twenty-one years ago)

Oh, ok.

― Aja (aja), Wednesday, 24 December 2003 03:00 (twenty-one years ago)

Ed your huge box of Krispy Kremes made my night yesterday. But they are neither crispy nor creamy, and their very name alone made me want to hate them and launch off into a huge 'Americans are stupid and tasteless rant' but of course they are SO NICE, far more so than I expected.

I am TOTALLY UP for opening the second franchise in London. They need to be in every major train station in the country, instead of Knickerbox. Like, who the fuck buys vaguely kinky underwear during the rush hour anyway?

― Matt DC (Matt DC), Wednesday, 24 December 2003 03:02 (twenty-one years ago)

Krispy Kremes are great.

― Aja (aja), Wednesday, 24 December 2003 03:05 (twenty-one years ago)

No, they kind of suck.

― Kim (Kim), Wednesday, 24 December 2003 03:09 (twenty-one years ago)

Whatever!

― Aja (aja), Wednesday, 24 December 2003 03:10 (twenty-one years ago)

No way, eh. Take off you hoser.

― Kim (Kim), Wednesday, 24 December 2003 03:16 (twenty-one years ago)

i like krispy kremes, too

― Eisbär (llamasfur), Monday, 29 December 2003 23:14 (twenty-one years ago)

Thankyou!

― Aja (aja), Monday, 29 December 2003 23:18 (twenty-one years ago)

yer welcome

― Eisbär (llamasfur), Monday, 29 December 2003 23:23 (twenty-one years ago)

Can I have a doughnut?

― Aja (aja), Monday, 29 December 2003 23:25 (twenty-one years ago)

not before you get some coldplay

― Eisbär (llamasfur), Monday, 29 December 2003 23:32 (twenty-one years ago)

I don't want any coldplay.

― Aja (aja), Monday, 29 December 2003 23:33 (twenty-one years ago)

then i guess you don't want any doughnuts, either.

― Eisbär (llamasfur), Monday, 29 December 2003 23:35 (twenty-one years ago)

today there are two boxes of cinnamon buns in the office. and no one's around.

― Huckleberry Mann (Horace Mann), Tuesday, 30 December 2003 18:23 (twenty-one years ago)

but me, obviously.

― Huckleberry Mann (Horace Mann), Tuesday, 30 December 2003 18:23 (twenty-one years ago)

Lucky!!!

― Aja (aja), Tuesday, 30 December 2003 18:29 (twenty-one years ago)

Random Co-worker: "Uh, hey Huck. Say, were these cinnamon buns iced when we left?"

― Huckleberry Mann (Horace Mann), Tuesday, 30 December 2003 18:31 (twenty-one years ago)

do you have a stick at your office? see if you can set up a net and get some distance shots in. Leave the buns outside to freeze, first, tho. Take pictures.

― Kingfishee (Kingfish), Tuesday, 30 December 2003 18:32 (twenty-one years ago)

dave grohl looks like a fuckin doughnut.

― Chris 'Knuckle Deep' V. (Chris V), Tuesday, 30 December 2003 18:42 (twenty-one years ago)

He does not!! How would he?

― Aja (aja), Tuesday, 30 December 2003 18:48 (twenty-one years ago)

Whats a doughnut?
http://www.hanspeter.nl/Dave%20Grohl.jpg

― Dave G. (Chris V), Tuesday, 30 December 2003 18:51 (twenty-one years ago)

Oh come on!

― Aja (aja), Tuesday, 30 December 2003 18:53 (twenty-one years ago)

This is a thread about gluttony, dammit!

― Huckleberry Mann (Horace Mann), Tuesday, 30 December 2003 19:12 (twenty-one years ago)

aja?

― Eisbär (llamasfur), Tuesday, 30 December 2003 19:14 (twenty-one years ago)

No. It's about the gluttony of doughnuts.

aja?

Yes?

― Aja (aja), Tuesday, 30 December 2003 19:14 (twenty-one years ago)

how are you today?

― Eisbär (llamasfur), Tuesday, 30 December 2003 19:15 (twenty-one years ago)

ILX = You Can't Do That On Television

― Huckleberry Mann (Horace Mann), Tuesday, 30 December 2003 19:16 (twenty-one years ago)

that's what my heart yearns for now ... doughnuts and pride

― Eisbär (llamasfur), Tuesday, 30 December 2003 19:17 (twenty-one years ago)

how are you today?

Ok. Why?

― Aja (aja), Tuesday, 30 December 2003 19:17 (twenty-one years ago)

i'm just being nice cause yer a nice kid

― Eisbär (llamasfur), Tuesday, 30 December 2003 19:18 (twenty-one years ago)

Oh thanks!

― Aja (aja), Tuesday, 30 December 2003 19:21 (twenty-one years ago)

he's actually not, aja.

― dyson (dyson), Tuesday, 30 December 2003 19:45 (twenty-one years ago)

Oh, ok.

― Aja (aja), Tuesday, 30 December 2003 19:50 (twenty-one years ago)

one month passes...

now there's a bunch of cookies out.
nobody's eating them. everybody's here though, so I can't just grab them all like I did the donuts.
but I had one, and I want another. what's the etiquette here?

― My Huckleberry Friend (Horace Mann), Monday, 16 February 2004 20:57 (twenty-one years ago)

depending the cookie-to-person ratio, you could probably get away with it

― Kingfish Beatbox (Kingfish), Monday, 16 February 2004 21:12 (twenty-one years ago)

there are about a dozen cookies left, and no one's touched them for 2 hours.
I'm about to leave for the day. I'm gonna grab 'em! Cookies and cable for me tonight!!!

― My Huckleberry Friend (Horace Mann), Monday, 16 February 2004 21:13 (twenty-one years ago)

glide past and scoop up a handful nonchalantly. Noone will notice if you keep looking straight ahead as though you're on your way to doing something else.

― ipsofacto (ipsofacto), Monday, 16 February 2004 21:13 (twenty-one years ago)

U&K: stick the handful of cookies in your underwear.

― teeny (teeny), Monday, 16 February 2004 21:16 (twenty-one years ago)

two months pass...

Low-carb impact affecting Krispy Kreme

― Eisbär (llamasfur), Sunday, 9 May 2004 18:16 (twenty-one years ago)

three months pass...

DC has a Krispy Kreme finally. FAD (Fancy a Doughnut) anyone?

― j.lu (j.lu), Tuesday, 24 August 2004 16:14 (twenty-one years ago)

eleven months pass...

Krispy Kreme is in a lot of trouble, eh?

― Land Ho (dymaxia), Thursday, 11 August 2005 15:19 (twenty years ago)

I'm really disappointed that Ally and I have yet to dress up in latex and have donuts.

― luna (luna.c), Thursday, 11 August 2005 15:30 (twenty years ago)

hee hee hee. i forgot about this thread.

― kingfish completely hatstand (Kingfish), Thursday, 11 August 2005 16:26 (twenty years ago)

Katsuit Katfight At The Krispy Kreme!

― k/l (Ken L), Thursday, 11 August 2005 16:34 (twenty years ago)

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