I don't believe it. (AKA the one chance you had in your life to do something right and you make a complete cock up of it).

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So I'm there in Parliament's tea room last night; I was meeting Andy, and I saw he'd seen someone coming into the room who started moving over towards where we were; I saw my coat was on a chair which was in the way, so I started to move it and stood up to give me leverage in moving the chair; sensing that this person was near me, I said 'sorry' in the very British way that we do. I didn't see who it was. I then saw a flash of blue. A blue suit. A blondish tint to the hair. It was her. Margaret Hilda Thatcher. The one time in my life I get to be up close and personal top someone I despise, hate, am filled with bile towards for all the things she did to ruin and cheapen my country and what happens? I END UP FUCKING APOLOGISING TO HER! TO HER!

AAAAARRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH.

Sympathise with me below, and post similar tales of woe...

― Dave B (daveb), Tuesday, 3 February 2004 23:42 (twenty-two years ago)

Oh god dave, I'm so sorry!!

― Pashmina (Pashmina), Tuesday, 3 February 2004 23:44 (twenty-two years ago)

my deepest deepest condolences

― Ed (dali), Tuesday, 3 February 2004 23:44 (twenty-two years ago)

HARGLEHACK!

― El Diablo Robotico (Nicole), Tuesday, 3 February 2004 23:46 (twenty-two years ago)

i sympathize ... and fantasize for a "chance encounter" with a certain chimpanzee

― Eisbär (llamasfur), Tuesday, 3 February 2004 23:47 (twenty-two years ago)

Yeah, what El Diablo said (it's a poetic term, that).

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Wednesday, 4 February 2004 00:21 (twenty-two years ago)

Dave, you have my deepest sympathy, It is a long held regret of mine that upon meeting Princess Margaret I didn't ask for my money back. But THATCHER. Lordy.

― Matt (Matt), Wednesday, 4 February 2004 00:28 (twenty-two years ago)

you could have said "i am the mirror god" and cut off her head with a seven-bladed sword, just like lee perry, with just a little bit of advance warning!!

― Pashmina (Pashmina), Wednesday, 4 February 2004 00:31 (twenty-two years ago)

Or at least beaned her with a used teabag. But you got to meet George Clinton, right?

― jazz odysseus, Wednesday, 4 February 2004 00:34 (twenty-two years ago)

dave - what would you have done had you seen her comming¿

― dyson (dyson), Wednesday, 4 February 2004 00:35 (twenty-two years ago)

Excellent question; my brane might have short circuited with the possibilities. I probably would have done nothing (hey, she'll be ded soon, so i can afford to crow) but that's a major league diifference between saying nowt and actually saying sorry. I am the worlds worst urban guerilla.

― Dave B (daveb), Wednesday, 4 February 2004 11:42 (twenty-two years ago)

Ha ha! < /Mutz>

― Sick Nouthall (Nick Southall), Wednesday, 4 February 2004 11:44 (twenty-two years ago)

Hmm, but in an idealised situation here, (tea room, coat, see who it is actually) what would you have done anyway?

1) Ignored her?
2) Moved the coat wthout apology
3) Poured her a cuppa?
4) Engaged in philosophical debate about 'knock on effect' responsibility
5) Shot her?

It's just as bad as saying "Your albums crap" at Victoria Beckham in the street or summat.

Saying "sorry" tho is kinda pants. Heck tho you could get the badge made to atone...

"I said Sorry to Margaret Thatcher"

― mark grout (mark grout), Wednesday, 4 February 2004 11:50 (twenty-two years ago)

or go here...

Things you are the only person in the history of the whole world to ever have done. Ever.

― mark grout (mark grout), Wednesday, 4 February 2004 11:50 (twenty-two years ago)

oh dude, how could you.

reminds me of the time a particularly anti-royal friend of mine wrote to the taxman to ask for 6 pence back after Diana died - he worked out that it was the amount that every tax payer in the UK paid on the divorce.

― chris (chris), Wednesday, 4 February 2004 11:52 (twenty-two years ago)

You should have acknowledged the ridiculousness of the situation and subtley grabbed her arse. Just to see what happened.

― Matt DC (Matt DC), Wednesday, 4 February 2004 11:55 (twenty-two years ago)

"just checking"

― chris (chris), Wednesday, 4 February 2004 11:58 (twenty-two years ago)

This is like thinking of a quip to throw back at the school bully five minutes too late... TIMES A BILLION! I feel your pain.

― Madchen (Madchen), Wednesday, 4 February 2004 12:03 (twenty-two years ago)

"Ah, Dame Thatcher, I thought I recognised your foul stench."

I'm toying with the idea of setting up a thatcherisdead.com website to countdown to her demise and then to celebrate the day - organising street parties etc. The Dai1y Mai1 would have a field day.

― Alfie (Alfie), Wednesday, 4 February 2004 12:06 (twenty-two years ago)

you should have seduced her, and then devastate her by dumping her unceremoniously just after she tells you that she loves you.

― ken c (ken c), Wednesday, 4 February 2004 12:07 (twenty-two years ago)

I'm told that in French there's a term for the feeling of suddenly thinking up the ideal witty quip for a situation, five minutes too late: l'esprit d'escalier.

― caitlin (caitlin), Wednesday, 4 February 2004 12:07 (twenty-two years ago)

Ah yes, halfway up the stairs is of course the place to have these moments. Those crazy French!

Alfie is, however, right OTM.

― Liz :x (Liz :x), Wednesday, 4 February 2004 12:53 (twenty-two years ago)

Ken, that was my plan when I saw Mick Hucknall in a nightclub in Milan. It didn't quite work out - a big bouncer kept me well away from the VIP area so I had to start hanging around outside the gents. I was quite drunk. Anyway, Martine McCutcheon did a far better job of humiliating him than I could ever have done.

― Madchen (Madchen), Wednesday, 4 February 2004 13:05 (twenty-two years ago)

Liz: I think the explanation behind the phrase is that you suddenly remember what you should have said just after you've left wherever, and are therefore in the stairwell on your way out.

― caitlin (caitlin), Wednesday, 4 February 2004 15:18 (twenty-two years ago)

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