Why does the act of moving to another city freak me out more than I let on?

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I need to move away. I've lived in this town for almost 10 years, and in Michigan for all my life. I've felt the urge to move for the last few years, and I think it's finally going to happen this year.

My question is, if this is something that I feel i need to do, why does it disturb me so?

For the longest time after I graduated from school, I was looking for an out-of-state job, figuring that i'd just move to wherever I got the job. it'd solve two birds with the same stone; getting an entry level job and getting the fuck out of here.

However, the years have passed(about 4), and now I have this habit of oscillating between two methods of job hunting--do i just move to wherever i can get a job? or just pick a place, then focus all my job hunting there? i don't really stick to one method, and thus haven't acted.

mind you, i strongly tie the two concepts together of getting a job and moving. The idea of moving to a new town without a job waiting for me feels too risky.

Anyway, in this thread, you humor my audible worrying about going to someplace else. How do i finally get the motivation to overcome the worries that i have(rational or not), and just fuckin' do something?

― Kingfish Beatbox (Kingfish), Friday, 20 February 2004 20:29 (twenty-two years ago)

Dude, come here. We will have fun and lay this shitbox hamburg to waste!

― My Huckleberry Friend (Horace Mann), Friday, 20 February 2004 20:35 (twenty-two years ago)

My question is, if this is something that I feel i need to do, why does it disturb me so?

Cuz it's really friggin' scary!

oh, shit. humor you. um, it'll be fine. go for it!!!!

― scott seward (scott seward), Friday, 20 February 2004 20:36 (twenty-two years ago)

yeah, go live with huck and eat hamburgers.

― scott seward (scott seward), Friday, 20 February 2004 20:36 (twenty-two years ago)

but seriously, sometimes you just gotta make that leap. you can always move back if you fail miserably.

― scott seward (scott seward), Friday, 20 February 2004 20:37 (twenty-two years ago)

So, are you basically planning to move to a city where you have absolutely no contacts at all? If so, I understand. I'm going through the same thing. You have to learn how to meet people all over again, without casual encounters through mutual friends.

― Dale the Titled (cprek), Friday, 20 February 2004 20:39 (twenty-two years ago)

1) Rise
2) Pack bag and boxes
3) Call movers
4) Congratulate yourself on actually functioning on a dream.

Moving somewhere else is always scary enough to grey your hair. Still, if you can economically afford to, move where you already know someone (ie, us) or actual fam.

― Nichole Graham (Nichole Graham), Friday, 20 February 2004 20:40 (twenty-two years ago)

I wanna move too (so actually don't come here), but won't for at least a year.

― My Huckleberry Friend (Horace Mann), Friday, 20 February 2004 20:42 (twenty-two years ago)

oh, any city i'd move to(Austin, Chicago, San Fran, Portland, etc), i'd know SOME one.

probably. except maybe Seattle.

― Kingfish Beatbox (Kingfish), Friday, 20 February 2004 20:42 (twenty-two years ago)

Oh, Dearest Kingfish. I know what you mean. I am talking to you from the other side, of course, as I've already moved. It should have been easier for me because my bf moved with me AND I was moving to a city with ILXors, but it was/still is very hard.

I would go with the pick a city first method. We visited lots of cities, found the perfect one, and then concentrated our job hunting efforts there (ie: here in Chicago). I found a job, NA didn't, but that was enough for us to go ahead with the move.

Moving itself IS really hard because there are loads of things you have to remember to do as far as cutting off utilities, turning on new ones (after you find somewhere to live), getting a new driver's license, switching the mail, figuring out what/how you're going to get all your crap to new said place... and so on. But I'd say it's worth it. In the end, I almost feel like I was magically lifted and dropped into another city and it's only been a month and a half or so since the big move.

I think the hardest thing at this point is making new friends. But I'm working on it. Plus, it's fun getting to know people.

― Sarah McLusky (coco), Friday, 20 February 2004 20:47 (twenty-two years ago)

you don't know from scary. i moved to philly in 1988, i believe jimmy carter was still president, and i only moved last year. to an island. in the ocean. and i can't even swim that well. and the only people who live here are drunk carpenters, lobster fisherman, and harvey weinstein!!!! and spike lee!!! and everything is okay. it will just take me another 5 years to get used to it.so, you can do it. it's good for you. new perspectives and all that.

― scott seward (scott seward), Friday, 20 February 2004 20:48 (twenty-two years ago)

there's only a .00000001% chance that it'll kill you.

― oops (Oops), Friday, 20 February 2004 20:51 (twenty-two years ago)

actually, the mechanics of moving (shit go into box, box go into car, power goes off, power goes on over there) i'm well acclimated with, having moved 9-10 in ann arbor over the last 5 years.

it's the heading to another place without a job waiting for me that i have a problem with.

of course, the fact that i tie all this in with job hunting(as most people would) doesn't make it any easier, as i'm already freaked about trying to get an entry-level job in an area where i have less than a year's experience and two degrees that are rotting on the vine.

― Kingfish Beatbox (Kingfish), Friday, 20 February 2004 20:54 (twenty-two years ago)

The thing is, getting a job ANYWHERE is hard to do right now, so you might as well be sending resumes to your fantasy location as well.

― Sarah McLusky (coco), Friday, 20 February 2004 20:55 (twenty-two years ago)

true. plus, i've been stuffing resumes up my own ass just to keep them safe(and warm), so perhaps that does as much good.

― Kingfish Beatbox (Kingfish), Friday, 20 February 2004 20:56 (twenty-two years ago)

There's an pre-interview technique I missed.

― Nichole Graham (Nichole Graham), Friday, 20 February 2004 21:19 (twenty-two years ago)

Kingfish, Ann Arbor can get really played out once you've been there too long (as you probably realize), so moving to a different city should be great for you. Also, even if you don't already have a job, it seems like you've already decided that the market where you're at is dry, so while it's a little freaky to take the risk, it's better than stagnating while knowing you don't really have a chance where you're at.

― webcrack (music=crack), Friday, 20 February 2004 22:01 (twenty-two years ago)

what if you save up some $$ and skip the "finding a job before moving " part?
good luck !

― kephm, Friday, 20 February 2004 22:07 (twenty-two years ago)

I'm in the same boat, kingfishee. Very excited yet very scared, although I'm in a much better position since mr teeny has a job already (in St Louis) and his family is there and my best friend is there. So maybe I'm not in the same boat at all. I am terrified of the job search, though, since I hope to stay in radio, and there's a whole lot of factors that will make that difficult. I've been in this same full-time job since I was 20, so I haven't gone job hunting for 8 years. My biggest fear is that if I don't find a job I will go back to the way I was before I had a job: insomniac depressive. :( I do not know how to deal with time on my hands.

― teeny (teeny), Friday, 20 February 2004 22:09 (twenty-two years ago)

i dunno. i just feel unnecessarily picky for some reason, even tho i pretty much just need a city that has:

a) indie rock
b) a tech sector
c) folks my own age

― Kingfish Beatbox (Kingfish), Friday, 20 February 2004 22:13 (twenty-two years ago)

(that was an xpost)

actually, Teeny, i'm the same. without a day job, i don't go to bed. with a fuct-up sleeping sched, it puts my mood thru the floor.

this has happened whenever i don't have a job(right after graduation, or when i lived in my folks basement for 3 months at age 25)...

― Kingfish Beatbox (Kingfish), Friday, 20 February 2004 22:15 (twenty-two years ago)

I found that cheeba helps A LOT.

― teeny (teeny), Friday, 20 February 2004 22:17 (twenty-two years ago)

a city with a tech rock sector would be even cooler

― oops (Oops), Friday, 20 February 2004 22:17 (twenty-two years ago)

how did you like boston/canridge when you visited? it has all three of the above.

― kephm, Friday, 20 February 2004 22:19 (twenty-two years ago)

I found that cheeba helps A LOT.

STONER.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Friday, 20 February 2004 22:21 (twenty-two years ago)

I'll stone you, boyo.

― teeny (teeny), Friday, 20 February 2004 22:22 (twenty-two years ago)

no, Cheeba Thurston, her therapist.
(you could just cut n paste that to every advice thread, teeny)

― oops (Oops), Friday, 20 February 2004 22:22 (twenty-two years ago)

um, xpost

― oops (Oops), Friday, 20 February 2004 22:22 (twenty-two years ago)

it was nice, but Boston left an odd taste in my mouth. i saw WAY more egregious displays of wealth there than i have anywhere else.

plus, i kept wanting to punch people on market/newbury street.

the hipster waitress at Bukowski's was nice, tho.

also, i don't smoke. at this point, i REALLY don't need something else distracting me or sucking away at the already low levels of ambition that i do have.

― Kingfish Beatbox (Kingfish), Friday, 20 February 2004 22:22 (twenty-two years ago)

it just helps me stop worrying and go to sleep, I'm not a wake'n'baker or anything.

― teeny (teeny), Friday, 20 February 2004 22:24 (twenty-two years ago)

you gotta leave the tourist traps & 'historical areas"
there are plenty of places around boston, such as sommerville, cambridge, jamaica plain that are v nice.

plus a short trip to NYC (well 4 hours) and you will never miss any bands on tour.

― kephm, Friday, 20 February 2004 22:29 (twenty-two years ago)

ive got 'freak out' being covered by the boredoms (chiba! chiba!) going on in my head now. i so need to go home

― kephm, Friday, 20 February 2004 22:33 (twenty-two years ago)

oh, i spent enough time wandering around cambridge, too.

and Southie

― Kingfish Beatbox (Kingfish), Friday, 20 February 2004 22:36 (twenty-two years ago)

southie? um, why?

well, its a hidden city/ all the good stuf is off the beaten path etc etc.too many people here anyways, too many beautiful creative woman, etc etc

well i am off to the bugs bunny film festival, then to decide between three bands that i must see.

― kephm, Friday, 20 February 2004 22:44 (twenty-two years ago)

Southie b/c there's where some LJ-chick was throwing a party. meeting her was pleasant, but her drunken cokehead friends kept pulling the fire alarm such that we had to eventually disable it.

― Kingfish Beatbox (Kingfish), Friday, 20 February 2004 22:46 (twenty-two years ago)

oh, any city i'd move to(Austin, Chicago, San Fran, Portland, etc), i'd know SOME one.
probably. except maybe Seattle
...

pretty much just need a city that has:
a) indie rock
b) a tech sector
c) folks my own age

Okay, Seattle has those things.

Hi, my name is Martin. Now you know someone in Seattle. (Donut bitch is here too, incidentally.)

― martin m. (mushrush), Friday, 20 February 2004 22:51 (twenty-two years ago)

yeah move to the west coast. NYC/boston is so over. the west coast has another ten years before property values and trustafarians spoil everything.

i am 20minutes out in the suburbs, but it is total bliss. i can have a garden, shoot hoops on an empty court and go see spiritualized in the same day /old man

― kephm, Friday, 20 February 2004 22:54 (twenty-two years ago)

For what it's worth, I was in this fix about a year and a half ago. I had spent most of my life up to that point (30 years) in or near Toronto, and was fed up. I moved here to London without a job and I only knew a couple of people, and not that well. It took me 6 months, but I eventually got a proper job.

It's a tough thing to do, but I can tell you that desperation is an excellent motivator. If you NEED to get a job, you will - it's that simple. And best of all, you'll meet people, make friends, etc. It just happens. I was scared shitless before doing it, but believe me - you won't regret it. Even if things don't work out exactly as you want, you'll STILL be glad you moved. Trust me. Life is too short, blah blah...

― Rob Bolton (Rob Bolton), Friday, 20 February 2004 23:11 (twenty-two years ago)

Seattle also has:

a) tech rock
b) a folk sector
c) rocks my own age

but ALSO has

a) rockage
b) a sick fucker
c) tech sects

― donut bitch (donut), Friday, 20 February 2004 23:23 (twenty-two years ago)

annnd MATOS! and me :)

― Donna Brown (Donna Brown), Friday, 20 February 2004 23:34 (twenty-two years ago)

Good point, Donna.

DB, I hope the sick fucker in question is not a reference to me. I'm happy just being a rock your own age.

― martin m. (mushrush), Saturday, 21 February 2004 00:45 (twenty-two years ago)

Martin, all you have you do is walk around outside and that should reaffirm that you are not the sick fucker in question. :)

― donut bitch (donut), Saturday, 21 February 2004 00:51 (twenty-two years ago)

And the rocks my own age (or slightly younger in this case) refer to some of the remaining ash and refuse from the Mt. St. Helens eruption.

― donut bitch (donut), Saturday, 21 February 2004 00:53 (twenty-two years ago)

If that's not an argument to move to Seattle, then I don't know what is.

― martin m. (mushrush), Saturday, 21 February 2004 00:54 (twenty-two years ago)

Volcanoes and sick fuckers. I'm in heaven.

― donut bitch (donut), Saturday, 21 February 2004 00:57 (twenty-two years ago)

Boy, this ain't heaven! This here's Seattle!

― martin m. (mushrush), Saturday, 21 February 2004 00:58 (twenty-two years ago)

The sick fucker of Seattle.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Saturday, 21 February 2004 01:53 (twenty-two years ago)

someone should get that tattoed on them.

― Kingfish Beatbox (Kingfish), Saturday, 21 February 2004 01:57 (twenty-two years ago)

Last year, my wife and I moved a paltry four blocks and I freaked out so much I nearly went grey. I can't imagine how bugged out I will be when we're invariably forced to leave Manhattan. I feel for ya, man.

― Alex in NYC (vassifer), Saturday, 21 February 2004 04:21 (twenty-two years ago)

four blocks?!

― Kingfish Beatbox (Kingfish), Saturday, 21 February 2004 19:29 (twenty-two years ago)

Ever been to Manhattan? Those blocks are LONG.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Saturday, 21 February 2004 19:33 (twenty-two years ago)

haha

― Alex in NYC (vassifer), Saturday, 21 February 2004 21:27 (twenty-two years ago)

And heavy.

― Sengai, Saturday, 21 February 2004 22:19 (twenty-two years ago)

Pardon my french, ladies, but: Kingfish, don't be a pussy.

― NA (Nick A.), Sunday, 22 February 2004 01:57 (twenty-two years ago)

hey the point of irrational fears are that they're irrational. I've been freaked out all day about this.

― teeny (teeny), Sunday, 22 February 2004 02:37 (twenty-two years ago)

y'know, i've just realized that almost any fear i have about moving to a different place is actually nothign but a proxy of the fear i have that i won't be able to get a job.

― Kingfish Beatbox (Kingfish), Monday, 23 February 2004 02:16 (twenty-two years ago)

In case you couldn't tell, I was joking. Of course it's scary to move.

― NA (Nick A.), Monday, 23 February 2004 02:20 (twenty-two years ago)

I guess I'm exactly in the same situation as you, as for the past two years I've been telling whoever wanted to listen that I was gonna move as soon as I found a job. Well, I still haven't found anything where I wanna go (Brussels), so I've decided that I'll resign on 31 April and just get on with it and move there.
So yeah, it's awfully scary (mostly the job part cuz once that's sorted I think everything follows), but Rob B's pretty much OTM upthread. If you need to find one, you'll find one (well, hopefully..). Being unemployed should provide the urgency that is required for a procrastinator such as me.
I'm just scared by the prospect of a rainy wednesday afternoon, with nothing to, noone to see and getting really depressed...

― Baaderist (Fabfunk), Monday, 23 February 2004 13:39 (twenty-two years ago)

I'm just scared by the prospect of a rainy wednesday afternoon, with nothing to, noone to see and getting really depressed...

an internet connection, a playstation, and going there with enough happy meds to last awhile is how i plan on handling that situation...

― Kingfish Beatbox (Kingfish), Monday, 23 February 2004 14:21 (twenty-two years ago)

one month passes...

okay, i've finally decided that my last day in michigan will be 31 Aug 2004. Since that's when my lease runs out, & i'm not resigning another.

of course i don't know where i'm going yet, but this should push me in the direction.

― Kingfish Hypercolor (Kingfish), Sunday, 28 March 2004 01:54 (twenty-two years ago)

four weeks pass...

hmm searching for other threads I found this.

Feel ya, jeremy. Might have a similar deadline myself. . .

― Ask For Samantha (thatgirl), Sunday, 25 April 2004 19:40 (twenty-one years ago)

down to Austin, San Fran, Portland, Seattle

― Kingfish Disraeli (Kingfish), Sunday, 25 April 2004 19:45 (twenty-one years ago)

what got cut?

― Ask For Samantha (thatgirl), Sunday, 25 April 2004 19:52 (twenty-one years ago)

three months pass...

Boston, Chicago, Chapell Hill, Denver/Boulder, DC got cut.

I found a place to live in Portland. It's the same amount of rent, bigger room, newer house, NE side. I fly out tomorrow back to michigan, and i return in three weeks. here goes nuthin'.

― Lt. Kingfish Del Pickles (Kingfish), Wednesday, 11 August 2004 05:46 (twenty-one years ago)

Good luck!

― adam. (nordicskilla), Wednesday, 11 August 2004 05:49 (twenty-one years ago)

Made about $630 or so during this weekend's sale, and i'm fucking exhausted after it.

i leave on sept 3 frmo ann arbor for good.

has anybody driven from the midwest to the pacific northwest? will the Rockies kill my car?

also, is it cheaper to ship by amtrak, US postal, or should i just drop $350 to get a trailer for the trip, assuming it doesn't kill my transmission?

― Lt. Kingfish Del Pickles (Kingfish), Monday, 23 August 2004 21:44 (twenty-one years ago)

this is now the KINGFISH IS MOVING TO PORTLAND thread.

i have too much stuff in this house. i should just burn the pile of it and be done. yet that is too easy.

at any rate, i'm now driving out there in my grand prix with no trailer. my road trip buddy has changed, since my original sidekick got too much shit from his wife for this. But now other buddy is taking his place, and has friday off, so off we shall go.

― Lt. Kingfish Del Pickles (Kingfish), Tuesday, 31 August 2004 06:42 (twenty-one years ago)

WE MADE IT

3 days in a car...

― Lt. Kingfish Del Pickles (Kingfish), Monday, 6 September 2004 22:30 (twenty-one years ago)

oh yeah, and we saw some sights along the way:

http://mediaservice.photoisland.com/auction/Sep/2004967473860238022366.jpg

― Lt. Kingfish Del Pickles (Kingfish), Monday, 6 September 2004 23:11 (twenty-one years ago)

That guy's a total meathead.

― x j e r e m y (x Jeremy), Monday, 6 September 2004 23:22 (twenty-one years ago)

http://media.hormel.com/images/refimages/museum%20press%20kit/SPAMBUILDINGWITHSIGN0260WEB.jpg

― Lt. Kingfish Del Pickles (Kingfish), Monday, 6 September 2004 23:28 (twenty-one years ago)

Where is that, Kingfish? Austin, MN?

― Pleasant Plains (Pleasant Plains), Tuesday, 7 September 2004 01:29 (twenty-one years ago)

yup. Free samples, too!

― Lt. Kingfish Del Pickles (Kingfish), Tuesday, 7 September 2004 01:32 (twenty-one years ago)

PICS IS POSTED:

http://mediaservice.photoisland.com/auction/Sep/2004992608708372669621.jpg

http://www.kingfishphoto.com/gallery/MovingtoPortland

― Lt. Kingfish Del Pickles (Kingfish), Friday, 10 September 2004 01:13 (twenty-one years ago)

The copies of Chunklet in the back seat totally make this picture

― Elvis Telecom (Chris Barrus), Friday, 10 September 2004 18:56 (twenty-one years ago)

I could look at travelogues all day long.

That Oasis Inn sign looks so much like 1980 to me. Maybe that's where Bandit stayed in Bandit II.

Where was the Pheasant at? The road that goes up the hill from it looks pretty wild.

84 MPH? Yowza.

And on an unrelated note, from what program was that template created? I see that on everything.

― Pleasant Plains (Pleasant Plains), Friday, 10 September 2004 22:11 (twenty-one years ago)

the program is Gallery.

the Oasis Inn is somewhere in South Dakota along I90. it is staffed by surprisingly cute/hot chicks.

The Pheasant Grill in is on I84, just west of Umatilla & all that. It's right by the Columbia River. Arlington, maybe.

― Lt. Kingfish Del Pickles (Kingfish), Friday, 10 September 2004 22:15 (twenty-one years ago)

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