I like this guy

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I like this guy, but I don't know if he likes me. How can I find out without asking him directly? I'm a very shy person.

― mya, Tuesday, 4 May 2004 19:04 (twenty-one years ago)

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― Dear Dotti (Ned), Tuesday, 4 May 2004 19:06 (twenty-one years ago)

http://www.cnn.com/interactive/allpolitics/0205/gall.fbi.history.timeline/maine.nazi.spies.jpg

― donut bitch (donut), Tuesday, 4 May 2004 19:07 (twenty-one years ago)

What the fuck izzat?

― Alex in NYC (vassifer), Tuesday, 4 May 2004 19:08 (twenty-one years ago)

email him naked photographs of you and see if he responds.

― El Diablo Robotico (Nicole), Tuesday, 4 May 2004 19:08 (twenty-one years ago)

Could someone please give me a serious answer. I have no one I can really talk to about this.

― mya, Tuesday, 4 May 2004 19:09 (twenty-one years ago)

Okay, okay... Can you ask his friends?

― Prude (Prude), Tuesday, 4 May 2004 19:10 (twenty-one years ago)

I was totally serious!

― El Diablo Robotico (Nicole), Tuesday, 4 May 2004 19:10 (twenty-one years ago)

Tell us more - mutual friend? Workmate? Stranger? How old are you?

― Martin Skidmore (Martin Skidmore), Tuesday, 4 May 2004 19:10 (twenty-one years ago)

Give him a chance to like you. Go talk to him. Get to know, find out if he's worth crushing on hardcore, or just nice to look at from afar.

― Huck, Tuesday, 4 May 2004 19:11 (twenty-one years ago)

That seems a bit juvenile, but I suppose I could.

― mya, Tuesday, 4 May 2004 19:11 (twenty-one years ago)

Talking to him seems juvenile?

― Huck, Tuesday, 4 May 2004 19:12 (twenty-one years ago)

I'm 23, but i'm very shy. He's a mutual friend, but I don't really think I could talk to any of his friends about it. He's known for not being very into serious realtionships. But I really like him.

― mya, Tuesday, 4 May 2004 19:12 (twenty-one years ago)

No that was towards prude..about talking to his friends

― mya, Tuesday, 4 May 2004 19:12 (twenty-one years ago)

Does he converse with you in a relaxed and pleasant way? Because this denotes utter indifference.

― Aaron A., Tuesday, 4 May 2004 19:13 (twenty-one years ago)

huck OTM. if you really like him get over the shyness bit.

― Felonious Drunk (Felcher), Tuesday, 4 May 2004 19:14 (twenty-one years ago)

Well yeah, I guess. I mean he doesn't fall asleep during conversation but he isn't exactly freakin out all over the place.

― mya, Tuesday, 4 May 2004 19:15 (twenty-one years ago)

I'm 23, but i'm very shy. He's a mutual friend, but I don't really think I could talk to any of his friends about it. He's known for not being very into serious realtionships. But I really like him.

Um, aren't you setting yourself up for disappointment already? I'm getting the impression you want something serious with him, yet you just said he's known for not being into LTRs.

(Unless you're asking how to just get in the sac with him.)

― donut bitch (donut), Tuesday, 4 May 2004 19:17 (twenty-one years ago)

Right..I guess I could be setting myself up. But maybe he would want to settle, maybe he just hasn't found the right girl. But how can I even find out if he's interested and if he even wants to try.

― mya, Tuesday, 4 May 2004 19:18 (twenty-one years ago)

Ask him out, or ask him to hang out. It's 2004, not 1954.

― Huck, Tuesday, 4 May 2004 19:19 (twenty-one years ago)

There isn't a good way to do this without taking a gamble or risk, I don't think.

― Martin Skidmore (Martin Skidmore), Tuesday, 4 May 2004 19:19 (twenty-one years ago)

all this will be much easier if everyone involved is drunk

― mookieproof (mookieproof), Tuesday, 4 May 2004 19:20 (twenty-one years ago)

Ok, so I should just approach him and ask him out? And if I get rejected which one of you guys are gonna be here to heal my wound?

― mya, Tuesday, 4 May 2004 19:20 (twenty-one years ago)

all this will be much easier if everyone involved is drunk

-- mookieproof (ole04...), May 4th, 2004.

just like everything.

― Huck, Tuesday, 4 May 2004 19:21 (twenty-one years ago)

and don't worry mya, none of us are going anywhere. Except Anthony, but he's already gone, I think.

― huck, Tuesday, 4 May 2004 19:22 (twenty-one years ago)

all this will be much easier if everyone involved is drunk

I agree..maybe i'll ask him out for drinks!

― mya, Tuesday, 4 May 2004 19:22 (twenty-one years ago)

everyone just kind of stole my answer...

I was gonna say, get drunk, try to engineer a situation where you could end up in a position where if something were going to happen, it would. Then hope for the best. (If you overstep a line, you have the perfect excuse by saying you were drunk).

Obviously don't be too drunk. But some drink tends to help these situations along.

― ailsa (ailsa), Tuesday, 4 May 2004 19:23 (twenty-one years ago)

And if I get rejected which one of you guys are gonna be here to heal my wound?

see, you can flirt--so you'll be fine

― mookieproof (mookieproof), Tuesday, 4 May 2004 19:23 (twenty-one years ago)

maybe he just hasn't found the right girl.

This is painful to say, but this is what almost every girl thinks about serious prospects with guys who aren't into serious prospects. I've been on both sides of the coin (switching the sexes of course), SEVERAL times, under extremely shyness myself.

Ask him out, but have low expectations. In all seriousness. That way, you won't feel as wounded. Keep in mind that you are just much hot shit as this guy is. With that attitude, you'll probably feel much better than you expected.

― donut bitch (donut), Tuesday, 4 May 2004 19:25 (twenty-one years ago)

just much hot shit as this guy is

just AS much.. exsqueeze me.

― donut bitch (donut), Tuesday, 4 May 2004 19:27 (twenty-one years ago)

I knew what ya meant. Ok so same bat time same bat channel tomorrow. I'm gonna go make an ass of myself and call him and hopefully meet for drinks.

― mya, Tuesday, 4 May 2004 19:28 (twenty-one years ago)

Yay!

― Prude (Prude), Tuesday, 4 May 2004 19:28 (twenty-one years ago)

"Right..I guess I could be setting myself up. But maybe he would want to settle, maybe he just hasn't found the right girl. But how can I even find out if he's interested and if he even wants to try."
No, if he's known for not being in serious relationships, don't fantasize that it might happen. Hope only for something thats possible, maybe having sex with him.

― Cacaman Flores, Tuesday, 4 May 2004 19:28 (twenty-one years ago)

Are you the singer Mya? If so, I'll go out with you. HOLLA BACK!

― Spencer Chow (spencermfi), Tuesday, 4 May 2004 19:29 (twenty-one years ago)

No..sorry I'm a blonde, but I'd like to think I'm just as cute...but just a white version.lol.

― mya, Tuesday, 4 May 2004 19:30 (twenty-one years ago)

Are you a living, breathing woman? If so, I'll go out with you. HOLLA BACK!

― Huck, Tuesday, 4 May 2004 19:30 (twenty-one years ago)

Good luck, Mya.

― Martin Skidmore (Martin Skidmore), Tuesday, 4 May 2004 19:39 (twenty-one years ago)

Seconded.

― Barima (Barima), Tuesday, 4 May 2004 21:52 (twenty-one years ago)

Yep good luck! And remember, it's almost impossible to get married and live happily ever after in just one night. Take it one step at a time.

― Tracer Hand (tracerhand), Tuesday, 4 May 2004 22:30 (twenty-one years ago)

If you're 23, you shouldn't be looking for a long term relationship. Wait till you're 24. Just say, "you want to get a coffee?" If he says yes, do so. Give him your telephone number. Say, "call me". Then don't obsess if he doesn't call the next day. Give it a week or two. If/when he calls you, it's his game then. Or at least, he's bought into a game. If he doesn't call after a week or two, give him one more chance. Tell him, "I changed my number. That's why you couldn't get through. But now I've changed it back. Here it is again. Sorry for the confusion. Call me." If he doesn't call after this, forget him. No risk, no reward.

― Skottie, Tuesday, 4 May 2004 22:59 (twenty-one years ago)

you changed your number and changed it back?

― bnw (bnw), Tuesday, 4 May 2004 23:10 (twenty-one years ago)

what should you be looking for, at 23?

― RJG (RJG), Tuesday, 4 May 2004 23:12 (twenty-one years ago)

changed number...just a silly line to say why didn't you call me without saying why didn't you call me which is whiney.

At 23, get to know as many people as possible. 23 isn't old. Unless you're 22.

― Skottie, Tuesday, 4 May 2004 23:18 (twenty-one years ago)

I used to be 22, which according to Skottie's math equals I'm old now.

― Leeefuse 73 (Leee), Tuesday, 4 May 2004 23:20 (twenty-one years ago)

And good luck, Huck. (And to you, mya! You sound like a far more reasonable new person than the recent drove we've experienced lately.)

― Leeefuse 73 (Leee), Tuesday, 4 May 2004 23:21 (twenty-one years ago)

??? Leee, unless you used to be 22 more than 22 years ago, I don't think you're old!

― Skottie, Tuesday, 4 May 2004 23:24 (twenty-one years ago)

it's time to settle down, lee

― bnw (bnw), Tuesday, 4 May 2004 23:26 (twenty-one years ago)

But Bill Mueller's all the way in Boston now.

― Leeefuse 73 (Leee), Tuesday, 4 May 2004 23:27 (twenty-one years ago)

I think I should make a follow up post on the cybering thread now.

PS sorry for the hijack mya!

― Leeefuse 73 (Leee), Tuesday, 4 May 2004 23:27 (twenty-one years ago)

I wanna know what happened!

― Nellie (nellskies), Wednesday, 5 May 2004 04:13 (twenty-one years ago)

blow him

― Eisbär (llamasfur), Wednesday, 5 May 2004 04:44 (twenty-one years ago)

Well...I called him yesterday afternoon and last night we met for drinks. And though, like everyone said, I don't think he's looking for a serious relationship he's one hell of a kisser and we're going out again tonight for margaritas for cinco de mayo :)

― mya, Wednesday, 5 May 2004 12:41 (twenty-one years ago)

Hell yeah! How did you get over the shyness?

― Huey (Huey), Wednesday, 5 May 2004 12:48 (twenty-one years ago)

Hurrah for mya!! (careful not to let him break your heart by getting too emotionally attached too quickly though)

― C J (C J), Wednesday, 5 May 2004 12:52 (twenty-one years ago)

I grew some balls...and faked an attitude that I was hot shit and he was lucky to be with me. It was actually kinda fun

― mya, Wednesday, 5 May 2004 12:52 (twenty-one years ago)

Could this be the first time in history that ILX advice has actually worked?

Hooray for bouze!

― Rob Bolton (Rob Bolton), Wednesday, 5 May 2004 12:55 (twenty-one years ago)

And of course, hooray for you Mya!

― Rob Bolton (Rob Bolton), Wednesday, 5 May 2004 12:55 (twenty-one years ago)

It's really amazing, the difference in discussion between this (American time zone) discussion and the British Time Zone discussion on this thread:

What was the concensus on the "I really fancy a friend of mine but don't want to mess up my friendship by asking her out" question again?

And the result is, that she got her man! So maybe there is something to be said for American Style Date Zone after all...

― Super-Kate (kate), Wednesday, 5 May 2004 12:56 (twenty-one years ago)

Mya, how do you fake an attitude you are hot shit?

Surely, if you can do this, ipso facto you actually are hot shit?

― Huey (Huey), Wednesday, 5 May 2004 13:00 (twenty-one years ago)

RESULT!

― Sick Nouthall (Nick Southall), Wednesday, 5 May 2004 13:01 (twenty-one years ago)

No no no no no. I don't think that. But I have done a lot of acting in the past. So I thought that in order to have self-esteem and "get over" my shyness which was recommended to me I knew I had to start somewhere. So I thought I could fake confidence and hopefully it will eventaully become a part of me all the time. So last night I guess I just pretended I was someone else and, yes, "faked it".

― mya, Wednesday, 5 May 2004 13:02 (twenty-one years ago)

So not only have you got yourself a hot new man, you've discovered a whole new confident side to yourself in a kind of overnight existential life changing way?

I like this thread.

― Huey (Huey), Wednesday, 5 May 2004 13:04 (twenty-one years ago)

I wouldn't say that it's existential life changing...but definately helpful. And the whole new confident side wasn't really discovered, and it just appeared for a few brief hours to try to impress a guy. but hopefully it can appear again when called up, and eventually exist permanently

― mya, Wednesday, 5 May 2004 13:05 (twenty-one years ago)

You can do it!

― The Huckle-Buck (Horace Mann), Wednesday, 5 May 2004 13:40 (twenty-one years ago)

this is a good thread. but i have nothing to add here, as mya apparently rocks. see? asking people OUT ON DATES works.

― colette (a2lette), Wednesday, 5 May 2004 13:43 (twenty-one years ago)

I like this thread.

I do too, for various reasons.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Wednesday, 5 May 2004 13:44 (twenty-one years ago)

and we've also learned that being nice to new people can turn them into ONE OF US.

― The Huckle-Buck (Horace Mann), Wednesday, 5 May 2004 13:45 (twenty-one years ago)

Well thanks colette.

― mya, Wednesday, 5 May 2004 13:45 (twenty-one years ago)

and we've also learned that being nice to new people can turn them into ONE OF US

Should I be afraid?????? :)

― mya, Wednesday, 5 May 2004 13:46 (twenty-one years ago)

ONE OF US! ONE OF US!

― Super-Kate (kate), Wednesday, 5 May 2004 13:47 (twenty-one years ago)

well, you're starting to look like Ned, so probably (only because Ned is superlative, not because, y'know)

― The Huckle-Buck (Horace Mann), Wednesday, 5 May 2004 13:47 (twenty-one years ago)

Both apply.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Wednesday, 5 May 2004 13:47 (twenty-one years ago)

don't be afraid.

actually, since you've come back, can we ask if you're a lurker or if you're a regular that i just don't know or if you just found us on google?

― colette (a2lette), Wednesday, 5 May 2004 13:48 (twenty-one years ago)

All confidence is 'faked'.

― Sick Nouthall (Nick Southall), Wednesday, 5 May 2004 13:48 (twenty-one years ago)

Actually I have no idea how I stumbled upon it...it was 2 days ago, and I was sitting watching Alias. I read people's stuff for a couple days and then decided that I should post a question, and even if I didn't get any sort of real answer, I knew at the very least it would be entertaining as all hell.

― mya, Wednesday, 5 May 2004 13:50 (twenty-one years ago)

"I have been on ILX for two days, and already I have a new boyfriend..."

(a bit like those piskies charms they are selling down in Polperro when we went this past weekend/bankhol)

― mark grout (mark grout), Wednesday, 5 May 2004 13:51 (twenty-one years ago)

ILX is more entertaining than Alias?!?!

― robster (robster), Wednesday, 5 May 2004 13:53 (twenty-one years ago)

Did you mention us on your date?

― The Huckle-Buck (Horace Mann), Wednesday, 5 May 2004 13:53 (twenty-one years ago)

Clearly not; she has a second date!

― VengaDan Perry (Dan Perry), Wednesday, 5 May 2004 13:55 (twenty-one years ago)

I'm sorry but I didn't mention you on my date. I didn't think that would be a very good idea. And no..Robster, NOTHING is more entertaining than alias. ok well maybe last night cause that was really fun, but i was looking for a message board on alias while watching it, and stumbled upon this instead

― mya, Wednesday, 5 May 2004 13:57 (twenty-one years ago)

haha "Hi baby, some random interweb mentalists told me I shoud ask you out" would be a great line.

Well done, Mya - and good luck with him, but CJ's advice is good: bear in mind his rep, so be cautious with your feelings.

― Martin Skidmore (Martin Skidmore), Wednesday, 5 May 2004 14:59 (twenty-one years ago)

NOTHING is more entertaining than alias.

I like mya.

― Leeefuse 73 (Leee), Wednesday, 5 May 2004 17:39 (twenty-one years ago)

Alias fans are okay with me.

― El Diablo Robotico (Nicole), Wednesday, 5 May 2004 17:41 (twenty-one years ago)

Uh can still fuck off and die though.

― El Diablo Robotico (Nicole), Wednesday, 5 May 2004 17:42 (twenty-one years ago)

That's so cool! you've given hope to all the piners. (coffee boy will be mine, oh yes)

― Nellie (nellskies), Thursday, 6 May 2004 05:01 (twenty-one years ago)

asking people OUT ON DATES works (if you aren't a hobgoblin)

― A Nairn (moretap), Thursday, 6 May 2004 05:38 (twenty-one years ago)

everyone is always 'acting'

― A Nairn (moretap), Thursday, 6 May 2004 05:39 (twenty-one years ago)

They probly use CGI for hobgoblins, though.

― jazz odysseus (jazz odysseus), Thursday, 6 May 2004 05:49 (twenty-one years ago)

but they can make hot ladies out of CGI too.

― A Nairn (moretap), Thursday, 6 May 2004 05:51 (twenty-one years ago)

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