Big Brother (UK 2004)

Kitten
Shell
Stuart

"Shell"?

There should be a Big Brother that features a house full of animals and random inanimate objects that you can vote off each week.

I am distressed that Jason looks old and haggard in his picture yet HE IS ALMOST A YEAR YOUNGER THAN ME.

Forty four year-old Ahmed is originally from Somalia, but had to flee during the civil war and came to England as an asylum seeker. He is now a British citizen and recently got a law degree. Ahmed is a Muslim and speaks English, Italian, Arabic, Somali and Merkani.

Daniel

Daniel from Hull, manages a lot in his spare time. As well as being a hairdresser, the 30 year-old is also a DJ, sings in an electro-disco band and practises ju-jitsu five times a week. Daniel admits he is out burning his candle at both ends every night (so to speak!).

Emma

One of the youngest housemates, Emma has been fired more times than she can remember and used to be an entertainer in Spain before landing her current job as a legal administrator. But don't be fooled - Emma is a party girl through and through, loves going out and meeting new people.

Jason

Glaswegian Jason is 30 and an air steward. Before flying the friendly skies, Jason worked as a refuse collector and a nude model. He openly confesses to being one of the vainest people you could ever meet and was once crowned "Mr Best Buttocks South Lanarkshire."

Kitten

24-year old Kitten is a human and animal rights activist, and a strict vegetarian. Not only does eating meat anger Kitten but so too does sexism, pornography, homophobia, racism and George Bush. But Kitten loves her cats and has called one of them Puddypuddyquadropodteddyteddyteapot and the other one, Kittikittiquadropodtabbytabbypeaches. Easy for her to say!

Marco

Marco is 21 and a law student and freely describes himself as the 'biggest bitch on the planet' and a 'total s**t stirrer'. When he's not being one of the above he is Vice President of the University Law Society but he says, he has no intention of being a lawyer. Marco is half Italian and an ex Samaritan.

Michelle

23-year old trainee mortgage advisor, Michelle, has a burning ambition - to be a glamour model. Before training for her current job, Michelle worked as a shop assistant, a chambermaid, a Tesco cashier and a make-up artist. Her proudest achievement, however, is losing a lot of weight. Michelle used to be a size 18 but is now a size 10.

Nadia

Nadia is 27 and a Bank Clerk and the eldest of six children. Originally from Portugal her family moved to England eight years ago. In the past Nadia has worked on a perfume counter and managed a children's bookshop. But what Nadia really loves is shopping, going out with friends and walks by the sea. But there won't be any of that for a while.

Shell

History of Art student Shell is 21-years old and a very conscientious student. When not studying, Shell enjoys long walks, architecture and going to art galleries. She is a passionate reader and works part time in a museum. In the past Shell has been a life model and in her spare time now she is training to be a sculptor in her hometown of Glasgow.

Stuart

20-year old Stuart is from Macclesfield and a student studying Psychology. He got 4 As at A Level and was head boy of his school. Ideally, Stuart wants to stay on at university to do a Masters Degree. He and his friends call themselves 'Team Handsome' and he aims to be a millionaire by the age of 25.

Vanessa

Vanessa is 26-years old and living in Leeds. Originally from South Africa, she moved to the UK six years ago. Vanessa is a self-confessed adrenalin junkie and was South African archery champion for two years in a row. She loves rugby and runs for an hour every morning. Now, that's a lot of laps of the garden!

Victor

23-year old Victor is a gap year student from London. Victor claims his nicknames are 'the milkman' because he always delivers, and 'Mr Slick' because he always gets the job done. He describes himself as being like Marmite because people either love him or hate him. Only time will tell.

Stuart is going to get his hands chopped off and shoved up his ass.

(xpost, NO BUT IT SHOULD BE)

('sfunny, I told people in my first ever job that my name was Marco - I could bear it only two weeks, then I begged them to call me Mark. Straightest ILXor evah!)

I think even the ILX tweefia would beat the shit out of this girl.

(xpost Mark, this is all on the BBC4 webiste! Is it really a spoiler if it the information has already been released?)

Reading the profiles, why has a 'passionate reader' volunteered to go without books for up to ten weeks? I coudn't go without for a day, I don't think.

(xpost: WELL OKAY!!!!!)

Dan, all housemates now in, so you can remove the spoilers warning.

Shell must win!

Is there a minority group they DIDN'T get in there?

Kenneth Pinder, a retired surveyor, said his daughter was in fact at a
?12,000-a-year boarding school at 16, the age when she told fellow
contestants on the reality show she was working as a child prostitute in
London.

She had, however, completed a well-regarded dissertation on prostitution
while a university student, so he assumed she must have drawn on that
knowledge for her attention-seeking stories on screen.

And Mr Pinder, 57, who had to remortgage the family's detached home to
satisfy 'radical' Kathryn's request to go to private school, said the whole
family are devastated by her sudden appearance on television.

None had been told she was to take part. Mr Pinder and his former wife
Elizabeth-Anne - they split in 1998 - were last night understood to be
making desperate efforts to persuade producers to remove their 24-year- old
daughter from the programme before more harm is done.

Since she entered the Big Brother house on Friday - publicly kissing her
girlfriend Lianda Gibson and giving cameramen her trademark one-finger
salute as she did so - she has already became unpopular with fellow inmates
and had all her belongings taken.

At his home in St Albans, Hertfordshire, Mr Pinder, who calls his daughter
Kat, said: 'Kat was having problems at her secondary school in Beverley,
Yorkshire, and she chose to go to private school.

'We remortgaged the house, and she chose Denstone College in Staffordshire.

'When she reached the age of 16, she was still at Denstone College. She was
still there right to the end of the following academic year.

'She was nearly 17 when she left. She then came home to live with her
parents in Beverley.

'She was a full-time student at Wyke Sixth-Form College in Hull and
followed on to Hull College doing A-levels. She studied continuously in
Hull and was living in Hull right through university until she got her
degree in 2003.

'She missed getting a first- class degree by a whisker and got the
departmental prize. Only then did she move to Brighton. She never lived in
London.

'I do not know why she has said what she has said. Her parents have loved
her and cherished her.'

He added that she may have found it easy to talk about prostitution on the
television show because her degree dissertation had been a comparison of
prostitution in London with that in Amsterdam.

Mr Pinder said: 'My daughter is a pawn in a much bigger game. The game
being played is being perpetuated by Channel 4. 'Channel 4 has allowed the
contestants to be conned.

'I did not know she was even staying with those people until the first
programme had been run on the television.

'She kept it all a secret. All the other families were there at the launch.

'People's lives are being destroyed because of this. Her mother has been
totally distraught.

'There are frail elderly relatives who have had sheltered upbringings whose
lives will be ruined by this.

'It is built on a huge fabrication of lies - had it not been for these
vile,
pernicious, totally sexual overtones and the fabric of lies around these
sexual things and prostitution, there is a lot in there that could be
entertaining.

'But you could not be amused by it and entertained by it because of the
sexual overtones and the sexual agenda.

'The sexual agenda prevents any semblance of amusement or entertainment. It
stifles the entertainment value.'

Mr Pinder said he last saw his daughter at her flat in Brighton in April,
when he visited her and her girlfriend with Easter eggs and her computer
from home.

And he said he wished she had not gone into the Big Brother house at all.

'Obviously I would prefer her not to be on the programme,' he added. 'I
would not like to go any further than that

oh, so when she was writing things on mirrors about Class War she neglected to say which side she'd be fighting on.

the whole 'don't blame me' thing last night was ridiculous.

Just noticed Matt DC's comments upthread - I think Ahmed has a similar shaped nose to me. But that's just on the basis of the picture above, as so far I have only seen BB's Little Brother yesterday eve., when they had discovered that Jason had fabricated the tale about him winning Best Buttocks South Lanarkshire. The funniest bit was when they showed us a fax from the club where the competition had supposedly taken place...I would have loved to have been the person who sent that to them..... "What did you do at work today?" etc.

So, what has the first week of Big Brother told us?.. Well, despite hundreds of emails proclaiming Kitten to be the mole (give us *some* fucking credit) only one or two of you guessed correctly. The clothing code (see last week) nearly ended in disaster with the threat of our mole losing all their kit, but we have managed to glean bits and bobs.... We need some help piecing it together though... can anyone from Endemol help?

a) Belgium.
b) Stolen car.
c) Panicking chaperone

And without wanting to sound like Mystic Meg...

d) Make-up bag

Holy Moly has absolutely no fucking idea what that all means, if you can help

This now smells more like bullshit than it did last week...

http://bigbrother.digitalspy.co.uk/article/ds6269.html

seems highly likely though...

http://bigbrother.digitalspy.co.uk/article/ds6273.html

http://www.ubfoods.co.uk/movies/potnoodle_1.mpg

ok so when are they going to switch them over without telling the others because that would fucking rule

Okayyyy.

dan and jason - so obv. even all the house-mates know.

Big Brother (UK 2004) - Have a squeeze of this bap: thread 2