AGGH my midget co-worker has caused me trouble!

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So I work in an office with this big window that looks out onto a courtyard, we can all see out but the windows are tinted so people can't really see in. I saw this one girl in the courtyard who was super-attractive in a Lisa Loeb kinda way, presumahly without the cloying songs. So I offhandedly mentioned to the midge that I had seen this incredibly cute girl, reddish hair, glasses, etc. He said jokingly "you should pass her a note and tell her to email you". I laughed in that polite manner you do when someone who work with tells a bad joke that's not in the slightest way funny.

An hour later I go outside and I'm talking to another co-worker, getting some fresh air, etc. The midge comes up to me and says "so listen I talked to her and pointed her out to you, and she said thought you were cute and said "tell him to email me" ". I'm thinking "whaaaaa?" and I'm really embarrassed now.

Which wouldn't be entirely bad, since the girl's cute and apparently very nice. However it is work, it is high school stuff, etc. AND: when I queried him as to whether or not the girl had straight hair, he said "no, it's wavey, curly", which means that THIS girl is NOT the girl I told him about! So now there's this girl in the building who thinks I think she's cute, who thinks I'm cute, but I have no idea who she is, because the girl I actually think is cute is someone else entirely!

whoops.

― Gear! (Gear!), Friday, 25 June 2004 23:06 (twenty-one years ago)

i fail to see the relevance of the co-worker's midgetry.

― andrew l. r. (allocryptic), Friday, 25 June 2004 23:10 (twenty-one years ago)

Ooh those fucking midgets!

― Dan I., Friday, 25 June 2004 23:11 (twenty-one years ago)

Midgetry is always relevant.

― miloauckerman (miloauckerman), Friday, 25 June 2004 23:12 (twenty-one years ago)

Introduce him to your roommate. Everyone wins.

― Tep (ktepi), Friday, 25 June 2004 23:12 (twenty-one years ago)

this would be a great tv show... a midget sets awkward dudes up with cute girls and then puts on a trucker hat and buttfucks their roommate!

― People love Gravity and Ebullition! (ex machina), Friday, 25 June 2004 23:13 (twenty-one years ago)

Gear, the fault is entirely yours, not that of the gentleman to whom you remarked about the hot chick. You see, you somehow failed to notice his wings and heart-tipped arrows.

― Dan I., Friday, 25 June 2004 23:13 (twenty-one years ago)

Lisa Loeb's attractive?

― Leeefuse 73 (Leee), Friday, 25 June 2004 23:14 (twenty-one years ago)

Midgetry is always relevant.

And it's totally fucking classic if getting shot out of a cannon is involved.

― martin m. (mushrush), Friday, 25 June 2004 23:16 (twenty-one years ago)

Lisa Loeb's attractive?

Curiously, she is more attractive in person than on television, but yeah, I think she's attractive.

― martin m. (mushrush), Friday, 25 June 2004 23:17 (twenty-one years ago)

Lisa Loeb is hawt, Lee. Especially if she broke up with the Zappa offspring.

― miloauckerman (miloauckerman), Friday, 25 June 2004 23:17 (twenty-one years ago)

http://www.jollydwarf.com/

― HELLtim, Friday, 25 June 2004 23:18 (twenty-one years ago)

I formed my opinion of Lisa Loeb before my emo glasses craze.

― Leeefuse 73 (Leee), Friday, 25 June 2004 23:19 (twenty-one years ago)

http://www.jollydwarf.com/

― helltime, Friday, 25 June 2004 23:19 (twenty-one years ago)

the midget part is relevant because I was referencing partially the story from roxymuzak, who had similar midget trouble earlier in the day but whilst her trouble involved a Diet Coke mine involves a potentially awkward encounter with a girl about whom I know nothing, not even who she is.

― Gear! (Gear!), Friday, 25 June 2004 23:21 (twenty-one years ago)

But Gear, it's no wonder he got the wrong girl, he probably couldn't see over the window sill to get a proper look at her, and now, under leprechaun bye-law, he's going to have to curse you, your children , your children's children and any associated pets.

And it's all your fault!

― mei (mei), Friday, 25 June 2004 23:21 (twenty-one years ago)

I'm doomed clearly

― Gear! (Gear!), Friday, 25 June 2004 23:22 (twenty-one years ago)

I think you might need a gypsy to counteract the leprechaun.

― Leeefuse 73 (Leee), Friday, 25 June 2004 23:23 (twenty-one years ago)

Plus there's the whole deal with how I hate to even approach girls I work with, because that's just proper in most cases, and now she probably thinks I sent this wee little man over to her in a cowardly attempt to win her heart. She did say "tell him to email me" but still...

― Gear! (Gear!), Friday, 25 June 2004 23:24 (twenty-one years ago)

so now I emailed this girl and she wrote back, and since she's apparently attractive I'm not inclined to say "haha, it's not you, sorry", and of course at the same time, what happens if I pass her in the hall before I meet her and don't acknowledge her?

upside: big building, she's on another floor and not working on my project
downside: it's not that big

― Gear! (Gear!), Saturday, 26 June 2004 01:20 (twenty-one years ago)

will this thread attract as much ire as my famous midgets thread?

― benito mussolinington (dubplatestyle), Saturday, 26 June 2004 01:47 (twenty-one years ago)

this is one of the reasons dwarf-tossing is legal in some places.

― chrisco (chrisco), Saturday, 26 June 2004 01:48 (twenty-one years ago)

(he's not actually a midget, he's just short, but he keeps joking about what a midget he is, probably because me and the other girl in our department are 6' and 5'11" respectively, he's about 5'6")

― Gear! (Gear!), Saturday, 26 June 2004 01:49 (twenty-one years ago)

FAMOUS MIDGET APPRECIATION THREAD

― benito mussolinington (dubplatestyle), Saturday, 26 June 2004 01:52 (twenty-one years ago)

Gear, just because you obviously have some kind of congenital thyroid giantism problem is no reason to call people of normal height "midgets." Oh, and they're not gypsies, okay? They're called Egyptians! god.

― Skottie, Saturday, 26 June 2004 01:53 (twenty-one years ago)

we're not giants okay, we're called "tallies"

― Gear! (Gear!), Saturday, 26 June 2004 01:58 (twenty-one years ago)

I prefer "luxury midget."

― Tep (ktepi), Saturday, 26 June 2004 01:59 (twenty-one years ago)

super-size me

― benito mussolinington (dubplatestyle), Saturday, 26 June 2004 01:59 (twenty-one years ago)

I've been forced to send my co-worker who caused me this trouble upstairs with my cell phone camera in order to snap a hopefully completely surreptitious photo of the girl in question, just so I know who she is. We'll see if he can pull it off.

― Gear! (Gear!), Monday, 28 June 2004 15:39 (twenty-one years ago)

sounds like your workplace is a carnival of hot chicks, midgets, and general buffoonery

― cutty (mcutt), Monday, 28 June 2004 15:41 (twenty-one years ago)

I'm jealous at Gear, he clearly has more everyday adventures than I do.

― Tuomas (Tuomas), Monday, 28 June 2004 15:43 (twenty-one years ago)

you have no idea how jealous I am right now.

(haha x-post!)

― CeCe Peniston (Anthony Miccio), Monday, 28 June 2004 15:43 (twenty-one years ago)

well he just called my desk from my cell phone, whispering "I'm lost, not sure where she is, it's really dark up here". I told him he can't return until this photo has been taken. Clearly no work will get done today.

― Gear! (Gear!), Monday, 28 June 2004 15:46 (twenty-one years ago)

plz post pic, thx bye

― chris (chris), Monday, 28 June 2004 15:57 (twenty-one years ago)

wtf, is he in the vents¿

― dyson (dyson), Monday, 28 June 2004 15:59 (twenty-one years ago)

tony cox to thread

― cutty (mcutt), Monday, 28 June 2004 16:00 (twenty-one years ago)

"I'm lost, not sure where she is, it's really dark up here"

Who DOESN'T hear this every day?

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Monday, 28 June 2004 16:00 (twenty-one years ago)

http://www.the411online.com/bet2003a/P6240128.jpg

― cutty (mcutt), Monday, 28 June 2004 16:00 (twenty-one years ago)

Midgetry? Isn't it Midgetude? Midgetry would be something like the study of how to build midgets or how they work.

What if he returns with nothing more than a shot of her midriff and breasts?

― Michael White (Hereward), Monday, 28 June 2004 16:10 (twenty-one years ago)

well he hasn't returned with a photo yet. I think he's just smoking up in the alley behind Albertson's again or something.

― Gear! (Gear!), Monday, 28 June 2004 16:21 (twenty-one years ago)

You're calling a guy who's FIVE-SIX a midget?!

― Jordan (Jordan), Monday, 28 June 2004 16:49 (twenty-one years ago)

how's it going?

― cozen (Cozen), Monday, 28 June 2004 17:58 (twenty-one years ago)

Gear, the king of real-time threads!

― Tuomas (Tuomas), Monday, 28 June 2004 17:59 (twenty-one years ago)

he's returned, mission not completed. he's got me in this mess and apparently it's all on me now. fucker.

― Gear! (Gear!), Monday, 28 June 2004 17:59 (twenty-one years ago)

that's too bad.

I hope it works out, for you.

― cozen (Cozen), Monday, 28 June 2004 18:00 (twenty-one years ago)

Do you know her name? You can try to google her. Or is that too creepy?

― Tuomas (Tuomas), Monday, 28 June 2004 18:01 (twenty-one years ago)

like this isn't creepy enough already

― s1ocki (slutsky), Monday, 28 June 2004 18:02 (twenty-one years ago)

I know her name and googled her, friendstered her, myspaced her, orkuted her, yahooed her, and all that came up was her name mentioned on my company's website. I'm beginning to think she's one of those mournful girl ghosts that crops up in teenage car death tunes, and I'll get her address and her dad will throw me out, telling me "she died in 1983!"

― Gear! (Gear!), Monday, 28 June 2004 18:03 (twenty-one years ago)

Dude, I hope you marry this girl and have grandkids so you can tell them, "Well, it all started with this 5'6" midget."

― Tep (ktepi), Monday, 28 June 2004 18:03 (twenty-one years ago)

Great opening line.

― Michael White (Hereward), Monday, 28 June 2004 18:06 (twenty-one years ago)

Skipping 204 messages at this point... Click here if you want to load them all.

it was really nothing more than me saying variations on "dude, you're wrong, it's totally Poquito Mas, and fuck that Baja Fresh shit. And El Coyote's food is ass." over and over.

― Gear! (Gear!), Friday, 20 August 2004 18:17 (twenty-one years ago)

Gear, you are one insane motherfucker.

― n.a. (Nick A.), Friday, 20 August 2004 18:20 (twenty-one years ago)

Vato loco este Gear.

― Michael White (Hereward), Friday, 20 August 2004 18:32 (twenty-one years ago)

gear! what is your take on tito's tacos?

― gygax! (gygax!), Friday, 20 August 2004 18:32 (twenty-one years ago)

It's been awhile, but they're good! I've got to try their chicken tamales.

― Gear! (Gear!), Friday, 20 August 2004 18:38 (twenty-one years ago)

I'll have to go back to Tito's and decide one and for all.

― dean? (deangulberry), Friday, 20 August 2004 18:40 (twenty-one years ago)

El Coyote's food IS ass. So is Tito's. I know I should like it, but every time I've been there, it sucked.

I guess maybe I should go back,too - clear headed and ready to be impressed.

Right?

― luna (luna.c), Friday, 20 August 2004 18:46 (twenty-one years ago)

El Chavo >>> Lare's >>> ALL LA MEXICAN

― dean? (deangulberry), Friday, 20 August 2004 18:50 (twenty-one years ago)

You're a brave person to do so, Luna.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Friday, 20 August 2004 18:50 (twenty-one years ago)

Maybe every time you went the cook was having a bad day?

12:37 pm, PT

MIDGE: Still looking for a place?

ME: Yep, moving to Los Feliz.

MIDGE: There's a place opening up in my building.

ME: You live in Hollywood, though.

MIDGE: Dude, 900 a month, huge apartment, carpets, everything.

ME: Yeah, but I want to live in Los Feliz and I'd prefer hardwood floors.

MIDGE: Let me tell you something. I've stayed up late on a Wednesday night blasting my Attack of the Clones DVD and no one's ever complained.

ME: No shit.

MIDGE: It's a total bachelor pad.

ME: Yeah, but I'm really set on Los Feliz.

MIDGE: I can put in a good word for you.

ME: No thanks, I'm heading to Los Feliz.

MIDGE: Sure about that? There's so much more to do in Hollywood.

ME: Pretty sure.

MIDGE: If you change your mind, (gives me thumbs up, affects terrible Sean Connery accent for some reason?!) juscht let me know! Hahaha!

― Gear! (Gear!), Friday, 20 August 2004 18:53 (twenty-one years ago)

http://www.lepconnie.com/willow/archives/maghoward9.jpg

― ())(())()()()(()(LASER)()()()LA(Z)E(R)()()()((L)()()(A)(S(E)R()()()) (ex machina, Friday, 20 August 2004 18:54 (twenty-one years ago)

Could you possibly snap a few pics and get us an animated gif of this guy?

― roxymuzak (roxymuzak), Friday, 20 August 2004 18:55 (twenty-one years ago)

i want to move to LA

― g--ff (gcannon), Friday, 20 August 2004 18:56 (twenty-one years ago)

Seriously: whenever people talk about various posts making them LOL, I'm always like, "Whatever, dude, it was funny, but not that funny." But that last line just had me doubled up!

― jaymc (jaymc), Friday, 20 August 2004 18:56 (twenty-one years ago)

http://photos.friendster.com/photos/90/38/6718309/5520446136334l.jpg

― Gear! (Gear!), Friday, 20 August 2004 19:01 (twenty-one years ago)

I can't see that!

― roxymuzak (roxymuzak), Friday, 20 August 2004 19:04 (twenty-one years ago)

http://www.bozzysworld.com/images/cantsee.jpg

― ())(())()()()(()(LASER)()()()LA(Z)E(R)()()()((L)()()(A)(S(E)R()()()) (ex machina, Friday, 20 August 2004 19:05 (twenty-one years ago)

Gear! sometimes I think you MAKE THIS ALL UP.

Also, pls post your work number and next time you are experiencing awful conversations with midge one of us will phone you with some important business queries.

― Homosexual II (Homosexual II), Friday, 20 August 2004 19:06 (twenty-one years ago)

i though we weren't suppost to use the "m" word anymore (what happened to "sid")¿

― dyson (dyson), Friday, 20 August 2004 19:10 (twenty-one years ago)

I had an ILXor call up my work midge recently! It worked wonders, kept her occupied and gave him some comic relief.

― roxymuzak (roxymuzak), Friday, 20 August 2004 19:12 (twenty-one years ago)

Gear, is the midge on your Friendster?!

― roxymuzak (roxymuzak), Friday, 20 August 2004 19:12 (twenty-one years ago)

okay I have another unrelated picture to post.

I just wandered into the lobby and this man...

http://photos.friendster.com/photos/90/38/6718309/5520512964144l.jpg

...is William Shatner!

― Gear! (Gear!), Friday, 20 August 2004 19:14 (twenty-one years ago)

(he's not on my friendster)

― Gear! (Gear!), Friday, 20 August 2004 19:15 (twenty-one years ago)

Hey Roxy was it Ken C?

Also is your roommate your friendster, Gear?

― Homosexual II (Homosexual II), Friday, 20 August 2004 19:27 (twenty-one years ago)

she doesn't really use the internet, from what I can gather. she's more of a text message geek.

― Gear! (Gear!), Friday, 20 August 2004 19:29 (twenty-one years ago)

I wanna text her.

― Homosexual II (Homosexual II), Friday, 20 August 2004 19:30 (twenty-one years ago)

Mandee, it was Ken C and what a shocker. I wanna text the midge!!

(Why can't I see the pics?)

― roxymuzak (roxymuzak), Friday, 20 August 2004 19:33 (twenty-one years ago)

Gear, please e-mail me your co-worker's phone number so that I may call him.

― Homosexual II (Homosexual II), Friday, 20 August 2004 19:36 (twenty-one years ago)

Ditto, you won't be disappointed.

― roxymuzak (roxymuzak), Friday, 20 August 2004 19:37 (twenty-one years ago)

you can't see the Shat-pic??

― Gear! (Gear!), Friday, 20 August 2004 19:38 (twenty-one years ago)

Nope! Neither of the ones you just posted.

― roxymuzak (roxymuzak), Friday, 20 August 2004 19:39 (twenty-one years ago)

Please e-mail me the number and me and Roxy can have a CONFERENCE CALL with him!!

― Homosexual II (Homosexual II), Friday, 20 August 2004 19:39 (twenty-one years ago)

he's out to lunch!

― Gear! (Gear!), Friday, 20 August 2004 19:41 (twenty-one years ago)

Boooo.

― Homosexual II (Homosexual II), Friday, 20 August 2004 19:42 (twenty-one years ago)

I walked in just now and he told me casually about how Norman Whitfield and Marvin Gaye Jr. were just hanging out at his apartment this weekend, drinking cheap beer with him.

― Gear! (Gear!), Tuesday, 24 August 2004 17:25 (twenty-one years ago)

I was just about to revive this thread and ask what was up. I can now go get lunch in comfort.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Tuesday, 24 August 2004 17:26 (twenty-one years ago)

I mean I'm almost inclined to believe him because this guy doesn't listen to music prior to Out of Time by R.E.M. (hence the unhealthy number of times I've heard "Radio Song" in the past few months)

― Gear! (Gear!), Tuesday, 24 August 2004 17:34 (twenty-one years ago)

Tell him "Proof or silence, sirrah!" then smile like Marty Feldman.

― Rock Hardy (Rock Hardy), Tuesday, 24 August 2004 17:46 (twenty-one years ago)

You know that Marvin Gaye, Jr. was the soul singer and that Marvin Gaye, Sr. was the guy who shot him, right?

― Pleasant Plains (Pleasant Plains), Tuesday, 24 August 2004 18:34 (twenty-one years ago)

Gear!'s little buddy prolly just knows a gay guy named Martin Jr.

― latebloomer (latebloomer), Tuesday, 24 August 2004 18:36 (twenty-one years ago)

"Marvin Gaye Jr? He's not home. He was at your place last night? Son I don't know what to tell you, Marvin gaye Jr's been dead nigh on twenty years...."

― Gear! (Gear!), Tuesday, 24 August 2004 18:38 (twenty-one years ago)

I'm sorry if I'm being dense, but he's not really equating listening to Norman Whitfield to hanging with Norman Whitfield, is he?

― Pleasant Plains (Pleasant Plains), Tuesday, 24 August 2004 18:42 (twenty-one years ago)

Because in that case, I've hung out with Black Sabbath, Franz Ferdinand, Peggy Lee, and George Jones in the last week or so. Hell, Phil Lynott was at my poker game last Friday.

― Pleasant Plains (Pleasant Plains), Tuesday, 24 August 2004 18:43 (twenty-one years ago)

He described having a conversation with Norman Whitfield and Marvin Gaye Jr, who had just stopped by his apartment Saturday night, presumably after Jeremy Davies had left.

― Gear! (Gear!), Tuesday, 24 August 2004 18:51 (twenty-one years ago)

I've heard that Jeremy Davies LOVED Attack of the Clones.

― Pleasant Plains (Pleasant Plains), Tuesday, 24 August 2004 18:59 (twenty-one years ago)

two weeks pass...

This wee bastard spent an hour this morning on the phone with T-Mobile. He talked to a customer service rep for a half-hour about how the rep needed to get more credit cards, then asked to speak to his supervisor to "put in a good word". He talked to the supervisor for ten minutes, then asked if he had a supervisor so he could put in a word for him. He then talked to a girl, told her about the great experiences he had with the other two people, then asked for her supervisor, and complimented her.

so then he hangs up.

MIDGE: Now that's what I call networking!

ME: Why?

MIDGE: Moved my way up the T-Mobile ladder.

ME: What were you calling them about?

MIDGE: To pay a bill. Oh shit. Haha, I forgot to take care of it.

ME: ....

― Gear! (Gear!), Wednesday, 8 September 2004 18:02 (twenty-one years ago)

Gear, sometimes, I swear, you're making this all up. ARE YOU SPINNING YARNS AGAIN, GEAR?

― Towelette Pettatucci (Homosexual II), Wednesday, 8 September 2004 18:12 (twenty-one years ago)

it's true, he's a madman!

― Gear! (Gear!), Wednesday, 8 September 2004 18:15 (twenty-one years ago)

Give me his number, I'm going to pretend to be a rep from T-mobile thanking him.

― Towelette Pettatucci (Homosexual II), Wednesday, 8 September 2004 18:18 (twenty-one years ago)

no no. call him and ask to speak to HIS supervisor to compliment his great networking. and then bitch him out about a late bill.

― Yanc3y (ystrickler), Wednesday, 8 September 2004 18:35 (twenty-one years ago)

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