A world with a total lack of sexual indiscretion

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I was just imagining what things would be like if people were totally indisceet about sex. As in:

"How was your day, Pete?"
"Ah, nothing really great. I can't wait until work's over, though; I'm gonna go home, have some cold ones, and masturbate to a few adult videos I bought yesterday."

or

"Ah, guys, Big Brother's kinda boring me. I think I'm gonna go see what Steve is doing upstairs and maybe get in a quick fuck with him before I go to bed."

Sorta like Dave Chappelle's "racially honest" sketch, except sex.

I don't really have anything to say right now, just wondering how something like this would change life. Hmm?

Girolamo Savonarola, Sunday, 22 August 2004 00:21 (twenty-one years ago)

I would just be vomiting all the time.

Alba (Alba), Sunday, 22 August 2004 00:25 (twenty-one years ago)

it's a funny idea but it's a funny idea.

RJG (RJG), Sunday, 22 August 2004 00:25 (twenty-one years ago)

and so is the sex thing.

RJG (RJG), Sunday, 22 August 2004 00:25 (twenty-one years ago)

Jello Biafra (!) did a spoken word wanky bullshit thing about this on his I Blow Minds For A Living Album. Called "The Lost Orgasm" I think.

Ian c=====8 (orion), Sunday, 22 August 2004 00:26 (twenty-one years ago)

It'd be great. You could buy a packet of Cadbury Arse Cocks at the local petrol station, and when the guy at the counter [wearing no pants and displaying a raging hard-on, of course] asks what they're for, you can show him. Then dear old Bert from the co-op could join in for some sucking and fisting before pumping his bike tyres.

Sexual Air Supply (Autumn Almanac), Sunday, 22 August 2004 00:27 (twenty-one years ago)

I would just be vomiting all the time.

But would you? I mean, if the whole world was like this, and you were too. I'm not talking about people bragging about sex...well not anymore than they would already. I just mean people answering questions completely honestly including sex, instead of omitting it or speaking very vaguely.

Girolamo Savonarola, Sunday, 22 August 2004 00:28 (twenty-one years ago)

Yeah, just like in Denmark.

Sexual Air Supply (Autumn Almanac), Sunday, 22 August 2004 00:29 (twenty-one years ago)

My serious answer is that sex would lose much of its appeal, I'm sure. It would become like just a pleasurable bodily function.

I mean, I'm assuming that all this would go hand in hand with much greater promiscuity. I don't really see how it couldn't.

Alba (Alba), Sunday, 22 August 2004 00:30 (twenty-one years ago)

I can't imagine asking my potential boss how his weekend was, to be told he had one off the wrist just before shaking hands with me.

Sexual Air Supply (Autumn Almanac), Sunday, 22 August 2004 00:30 (twenty-one years ago)

Something would have to give. No one would talk about eating in public anymore. The bedroom would be comepletely open, but when Mommy and Daddy are in the dining room, you kids just best keep to yourselves. Eating leftover chili over the kitchen sink would just be pathetic. Actually, it already kinda is.

Pleasant Plains (Pleasant Plains), Sunday, 22 August 2004 00:31 (twenty-one years ago)

Perhaps discretion would then be applied to something else, like gardening.

'Yes, Bill and I spent the morning drinking each other's love juice and tickling our anuses while watching [i]Bert Newton's Morning Cockfest[/i], then we went outside and did some weeding. Er, I mean fellated the paperboy. Good lord, how embarrasing.'

Sexual Air Supply (Autumn Almanac), Sunday, 22 August 2004 00:33 (twenty-one years ago)

Bad tags ruin everything. Perhaps I shouldn't have been licking my own mushroom whilst typing.

Sexual Air Supply (Autumn Almanac), Sunday, 22 August 2004 00:34 (twenty-one years ago)

> I mean, I'm assuming that all this would go hand in hand with much greater promiscuity. I don't really see how it couldn't.

Problem being? Honestly.

H (Heruy), Sunday, 22 August 2004 00:39 (twenty-one years ago)

the world would be an awful lot like ILX, I presume

CeCe Peniston (Anthony Miccio), Sunday, 22 August 2004 00:39 (twenty-one years ago)

I don't know - err... sex becomes less special? Call me old-fashioned, again.

Alba (Alba), Sunday, 22 August 2004 00:40 (twenty-one years ago)

for some of you this will mean less sex than you are used to, others much more

Comic Book CeCe Peniston (Anthony Miccio), Sunday, 22 August 2004 00:43 (twenty-one years ago)

Explain why there needs to be more promiscuity? Explain why something else would suddenly have to replace sexuality as a topic of discretion?

Girolamo Savonarola, Sunday, 22 August 2004 00:47 (twenty-one years ago)

ppl actually talk abt sex, honesty = good.
ppl relax have more sex.
sex = good.
more and more ppl having sex = happy ppl.
happy ppl = peace love & coffee.

wars end and we all drink coffee. a happy ending if i ever heard of one.

H (Heruy), Sunday, 22 August 2004 00:47 (twenty-one years ago)

Yeah, except for the coffee bit.

Girolamo Savonarola, Sunday, 22 August 2004 00:49 (twenty-one years ago)

BLASPHEMER!!!!!

(this is why the stake was developed)

H (Heruy), Sunday, 22 August 2004 00:52 (twenty-one years ago)

See, this is why you need to stop drinking coffee.

Girolamo Savonarola, Sunday, 22 August 2004 00:53 (twenty-one years ago)

Now if only there was a way to mix sex and coffee in a convenient, non-painful or messy way.

chrisco (chrisco), Sunday, 22 August 2004 01:02 (twenty-one years ago)

well, you (i shut up now)

H (Heruy), Sunday, 22 August 2004 01:04 (twenty-one years ago)

more fights, less bullshit.

hstencil (hstencil), Sunday, 22 August 2004 01:05 (twenty-one years ago)

Aww, i was hoping someone would find me latte porn.

chrisco (chrisco), Sunday, 22 August 2004 01:07 (twenty-one years ago)

lactatic italian women, weirdo.

RJG (RJG), Sunday, 22 August 2004 01:08 (twenty-one years ago)

Why can't I post an image here?

Sexual Air Supply (Autumn Almanac), Sunday, 22 August 2004 01:11 (twenty-one years ago)

Your nagging conscience?

chrisco (chrisco), Sunday, 22 August 2004 01:12 (twenty-one years ago)

Girolamo, because lots of people would like to have sex with one another but don't realise the other is keen, and don't broach the subject.

Alba (Alba), Sunday, 22 August 2004 01:17 (twenty-one years ago)

we should all have sex broaches, like mood rings, that show if we are ready to have sex or not.

that's a better idea.

RJG (RJG), Sunday, 22 August 2004 01:26 (twenty-one years ago)

Or, you could just use mood rings and see who you end up with.

Girolamo Savonarola, Sunday, 22 August 2004 01:27 (twenty-one years ago)

no, I like broaches.

RJG (RJG), Sunday, 22 August 2004 01:29 (twenty-one years ago)

don't broach the subject.

hstencil (hstencil), Sunday, 22 August 2004 01:31 (twenty-one years ago)

Have you ever been to a Harverster traffic-light party before, RJG?

Alba (Alba), Sunday, 22 August 2004 01:31 (twenty-one years ago)

is it like cold lamping?

RJG (RJG), Sunday, 22 August 2004 01:34 (twenty-one years ago)

Anyway, this whole brooch/broach joke works better in speech. Can we recreate this thread next time we see each other, please?

Alba (Alba), Sunday, 22 August 2004 01:34 (twenty-one years ago)

Girolamo, because lots of people would like to have sex with one another but don't realise the other is keen, and don't broach the subject.

I don't buy it, though. Just because two people each know that they'd like to have sex with each other doesn't mean that they would. There still are real world factors going on here.

Also, I didn't mean that everyone would be so honest as to suddenly start telling everybody all their thoughts - I just was wondering what would happen if people weren't so inhibited about talking about sex just as casually as most anything else.

Girolamo Savonarola, Sunday, 22 August 2004 01:35 (twenty-one years ago)

I don't think I'll be in the mood.

RJG (RJG), Sunday, 22 August 2004 01:35 (twenty-one years ago)

when you and Ronan go 'on the pull'?

H (Heruy), Sunday, 22 August 2004 01:35 (twenty-one years ago)

haha, I'd like to see that.

RJG (RJG), Sunday, 22 August 2004 01:36 (twenty-one years ago)

sorry for the repeat, I just love that phrase.

hstencil (hstencil), Sunday, 22 August 2004 01:37 (twenty-one years ago)

Bert Newton's Morning Cockfest

Now, really. That was quite unnecessary, don't you think?

Pleasant Plains (Pleasant Plains), Sunday, 22 August 2004 02:34 (twenty-one years ago)

Not in a world with a total lack of sexual indiscretion. Now drop and give me joy.

Sexual Air Supply (Autumn Almanac), Sunday, 22 August 2004 02:36 (twenty-one years ago)

I believe the proper phrase is "now drop and give me 69"

Curt1s St3ph3ns, Sunday, 22 August 2004 02:39 (twenty-one years ago)

That's not even a phrase, dammit. I'm slipping!

Curt1s St3ph3ns, Sunday, 22 August 2004 02:39 (twenty-one years ago)

Hmm.. now I am imagining Peter & Gordon singing "I don't care what they say, I won't stay in a world with a total lack of sexual indiscretion."

Alba (Alba), Sunday, 22 August 2004 03:05 (twenty-one years ago)

Has no one else noticed the thread title is the opposite of what it is supposed to say?

Anyway, I thought I already did this. I am slightly cautious to avoid upsetting/disturbing people too much, but otherwise I'm extremely open about sexual things. I can't imagine that there is much more I'd say in this postulated world, I guess it'd just be easier to phrase things without some self-censorship.

Martin Skidmore (Martin Skidmore), Sunday, 22 August 2004 08:16 (twenty-one years ago)

Has no one else noticed the thread title is the opposite of what it is supposed to say?

I did.

A thread with a total lack of sexual discretion

Harold Media (kenan), Sunday, 22 August 2004 08:52 (twenty-one years ago)

I feel very foolish for not noticing that.

Alba (Alba), Sunday, 22 August 2004 11:49 (twenty-one years ago)

(I was wondering when Martin was going to turn up)

Alba (Alba), Sunday, 22 August 2004 11:50 (twenty-one years ago)

i had but did not bother, and yes Martin was needed on this thread

H (Heruy), Sunday, 22 August 2004 14:43 (twenty-one years ago)

Yeah, I was thinking the world would be better if it was more chaste!

jel -- (jel), Sunday, 22 August 2004 14:47 (twenty-one years ago)

This thread needs some clowns:

http://www.unpetitcoinpourtoi.com/image2/certificat_dada.jpg

Leon Czolgosz (Nicole), Sunday, 22 August 2004 14:51 (twenty-one years ago)

This thread is full of 'em

Jimmy Mod, Man About Towne (ModJ), Sunday, 22 August 2004 14:53 (twenty-one years ago)

This is true.

Leon Czolgosz (Nicole), Sunday, 22 August 2004 14:53 (twenty-one years ago)

Something would have to give. No one would talk about eating in public anymore.

Isn't there a Stanislaw Lem text where this happens? One of the fake reviews in A Perfect Vacuum: I'm pretty sure it involves a sexually-liberated futureworld in which our entire sex-culture gets projected onto food.

nabiscothingy, Sunday, 22 August 2004 15:04 (twenty-one years ago)

Yeuch. Food bukakke.

Alba (Alba), Sunday, 22 August 2004 15:06 (twenty-one years ago)

There are lots of sexually liberated futureworlds, aren't there? At least, I have a feeling there are, but I'm not much of a SF buff so I can't point to any examples right now. I'm thinking of those oafs lazing around in The Time Machine but I've only seen the film and hot liberated sex scenes were a no-no when it was made, so I'm not sure where I got that idea from.

Alba (Alba), Sunday, 22 August 2004 15:09 (twenty-one years ago)

Demolition Man had the right idea!

jel -- (jel), Sunday, 22 August 2004 15:10 (twenty-one years ago)

stranger in a strange land, definitely. liberated futureworld = lots of attachment-free sex as a religion

xpost

lauren (laurenp), Sunday, 22 August 2004 15:11 (twenty-one years ago)

sleeper, obviously.

RJG (RJG), Sunday, 22 August 2004 15:11 (twenty-one years ago)

Brave New World, they all go to the feelies.

jel -- (jel), Sunday, 22 August 2004 15:13 (twenty-one years ago)

not barbarella, it's crap.

g--ff (gcannon), Sunday, 22 August 2004 15:17 (twenty-one years ago)

you take that back right now.

lauren (laurenp), Sunday, 22 August 2004 15:40 (twenty-one years ago)

Barbarella-world sex seems quite tame.

Alba (Alba), Sunday, 22 August 2004 15:54 (twenty-one years ago)

It's all implied innit?

jel -- (jel), Sunday, 22 August 2004 16:34 (twenty-one years ago)

I was trying to think where that eroticisation of food was - I think Nabisco is right.

Martin Skidmore (Martin Skidmore), Sunday, 22 August 2004 17:26 (twenty-one years ago)

http://www.siphrd.com/yqqy/nabisco/nabisco16.jpg

so right, that it's wrong.

RJG (RJG), Sunday, 22 August 2004 17:27 (twenty-one years ago)

I call it "Kraftwerk".

Alba (Alba), Sunday, 22 August 2004 17:29 (twenty-one years ago)

Maybe I was thinking about that part in Breakfast of Champions where the astronaut goes to a world where everyone has to eat this awful, filmy, charcoal-like substance. He and his new friends hit a porn theater where the actors on the screen are eating all of this obviously fake meat and succulent fruit and gravy and bread. There's close-ups of a woman eating an apple, they even put a dog up on the dinner table at the end, etc. After the movie, everyone goes out and gets a dinner of more charcoal.

Look at that box of Triscuits up there, trying to look all so prissy and above all that other junk food and whatnot.

Pleasant Plains (Pleasant Plains), Sunday, 22 August 2004 20:06 (twenty-one years ago)

most food commercials on TV remind me of porn, except with better lighting.

hstencil (hstencil), Sunday, 22 August 2004 20:07 (twenty-one years ago)

Condensation on Tomatoes?

http://www.spiegel.de/img/0,1020,167324,00.jpg

hstencil (hstencil), Sunday, 22 August 2004 20:14 (twenty-one years ago)

That ain't mayonnaise.[/letterman]

j.lu (j.lu), Sunday, 22 August 2004 20:14 (twenty-one years ago)

Onions shaped like bottlecaps ... ooh.

Pleasant Plains (Pleasant Plains), Sunday, 22 August 2004 20:31 (twenty-one years ago)

most food commercials on TV remind me of porn, except with better lighting.

Fancy A Gastroporn?

R.I.M.A. (Barima), Sunday, 22 August 2004 20:35 (twenty-one years ago)

no thanks, I'm on a diet.

hstencil (hstencil), Sunday, 22 August 2004 20:36 (twenty-one years ago)


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