Pelvic Floor Exercises (kegels) C or D

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Ladies - do you perform these? How often? How many at a time?

Does your partner feel a difference? Do YOU?

Are they worth it?

I've toyed with them on occasion, but don't feel any particular need to get right into them, though that may change when I have a child.

Worth it or not?

― Rumpie, Friday, 2 September 2005 09:00 (nineteen years ago)

Apparently it's worth it, but I have never kept the exercises up for long enough to feel a difference.

― Panther Pink (Pinkpanther), Friday, 2 September 2005 09:13 (nineteen years ago)

Do them while you're having sex. Your partner will buy you a fur coat.

― Penelope_111 (Penelope_111), Friday, 2 September 2005 09:22 (nineteen years ago)

*nods feverishly* well, it was a Karen Millen cocktail dress, but the principle's the same.

― Matt (Matt), Friday, 2 September 2005 10:20 (nineteen years ago)

Do them while you're having sex. Your partner will buy you a fur coat.

and/or propose/lose the power of speech/declare undying love/promise the earth!

― CharlieNo4 (Charlie), Friday, 2 September 2005 10:27 (nineteen years ago)

Do them while you're having sex. Your partner will buy you a fur coat.
Oh yes of course this too...

― Panther Pink (Pinkpanther), Friday, 2 September 2005 10:29 (nineteen years ago)

I used to do them back when I still had sex. I've never been given a fur coat, though. At least not by a partner, only ever by elderly female relatives.

― Luminiferous Aether (kate), Friday, 2 September 2005 10:33 (nineteen years ago)

Tbh, I couldn't think of anything worse that being given a fur coat.

― Panther Pink (Pinkpanther), Friday, 2 September 2005 10:38 (nineteen years ago)

Becoming a fur coat?

― Tom (Groke), Friday, 2 September 2005 10:39 (nineteen years ago)

Well yes there is that I guess...

― Panther Pink (Pinkpanther), Friday, 2 September 2005 10:40 (nineteen years ago)

I must say, I was too scared to wear either of my grannies' foxes. I mean, they're so old they would be dead naturally by now, but still.

The mink, I was overjoyed to find out, was completely fake. So I used to wear it a lot. And once or twice got shouted at saying "fur is dead!" so I shouted back saying "Yes, 2000 teddy bears died to produce the fake fur for this coat!" Idiots.

Anyway... back to the sexing. I think they do make a difference, especially if you've either had children (they were designed to make childbirth easier anyway) or you're getting long in the tooth like me.

― Luminiferous Aether (kate), Friday, 2 September 2005 10:43 (nineteen years ago)

Vagina dentata?

― Penelope_111 (Penelope_111), Friday, 2 September 2005 10:45 (nineteen years ago)

yvonne has and occasionally still does.

shes pretty, ah, great.

― mullygrubbr (bulbs), Friday, 2 September 2005 10:46 (nineteen years ago)

Ha ha ha! Yes, vagina dentata, maybe that's why I can't get laid!

― Luminiferous Aether (kate), Friday, 2 September 2005 10:46 (nineteen years ago)

if you mean what i think you mean: classic.

― g-kit (g-kit), Friday, 2 September 2005 10:47 (nineteen years ago)

Hmmm, it can be hard to synchronise them with the thrusting, even the slow gentle strokes.....

And I'm a lazy lover anyway ;-)

― Rumpie, Friday, 2 September 2005 10:53 (nineteen years ago)

What would be the male equivalent? Is there some kind of exercise that men can do to enhance their thrusting muscles? Some kind of super-situps or something?

(Then again, I'm sure Iggy must do them, and his stomach/groin muscle area (heh heh I said Area in a pervy way) frankly SCARES me.)

― Luminiferous Aether (kate), Friday, 2 September 2005 10:53 (nineteen years ago)

er.. clit-fucking skillz?

― g-kit (g-kit), Friday, 2 September 2005 10:56 (nineteen years ago)

He was more naked on Tuesday, (tease!) but this gives an idea:

http://www.eyeranian.net/IggyPOp.gif

(Do not click on this link, Pink! It will revolt you!)

― Luminiferous Aether (kate), Friday, 2 September 2005 10:56 (nineteen years ago)

The male equivalent == "holding on until an opportune moment"

― mark grout (mark grout), Friday, 2 September 2005 10:57 (nineteen years ago)

Ah yes! Tantric yoga, yes!

(So I need waste no more time contemplating Iggy's Area.)

― Luminiferous Aether (kate), Friday, 2 September 2005 10:58 (nineteen years ago)

can i ask, in the privacy of our own board, is thrusting overrated? or maybe over thrusting?

― mullygrubbr (bulbs), Friday, 2 September 2005 11:04 (nineteen years ago)

Depends on the situation. A good, quick, rough and hearty thrust session is good (for me at least). But if it goes on too long, it can become rather painful.

― Luminiferous Aether (kate), Friday, 2 September 2005 11:07 (nineteen years ago)

ah. is the old long thrust a winner? or are short thrusts better?

― mullygrubbr (bulbs), Friday, 2 September 2005 11:09 (nineteen years ago)

Depends on the position I say.

Like long slow thrusts don't suit doggy style at all (at least for me)

― Rumpie, Friday, 2 September 2005 11:16 (nineteen years ago)

Pelvic Floor Exercises

BEST SUMMER GYMNASTICS EVER

There is a male variation of Kegels that make the muscles around your urethra like steel and basically allow you to ejaculate on cue. Damn, I miss my 20s.

― The Ghost of Black Elegance (Dan Perry), Friday, 2 September 2005 11:19 (nineteen years ago)

XxXx ((( THRUST CONTROL GUIDE ))) xXxX

SM CAPACITY: REGULAR
LG CAPACITY: NITROUS

2 FAST 2 FURIOUZ PINOY LUV 2K5 BIACH

― LARGE ENGINE (LeCoq), Friday, 2 September 2005 11:25 (nineteen years ago)

"mama said 'if they try to fuck you in jail, lock your ass' - just lock, break, SNAP that dick off, lock ya ass. mama said lock my ass? mama said lock my ass."

"oh who, martin? oh yeah I fucked him. tried to lock on me and shiet."

― professor asspunk (LeCoq), Friday, 2 September 2005 11:28 (nineteen years ago)

I bought a pack of 'Peter North's Pro Training' cock rings on the dranked up recommendation of someone whose actual name is Ainsleigh. Three rings in different sizes and endless combinations - though I can't roll with the ones involving ball constriction - mines is too close to my body and it hurts. But the main configuration, wowzorz. Half an hour of devastating hugeness, and with repeat use you naturally start being that way on your own more easily. You feel like you could easily tear out someone's stomach with that thing, like a true national champion.

― Ball Out (LeCoq), Friday, 2 September 2005 12:35 (nineteen years ago)

I keep forgetting to do these argh.

― teeny (teeny), Friday, 2 September 2005 16:55 (nineteen years ago)

Teeny don't forget! Then again, they didn't matter much for my wife, because both our stupid kids got the cords wrapped around their necks on the way out, so we had other things about which to worry.

― Haikunym (Haikunym), Friday, 2 September 2005 17:21 (nineteen years ago)

Haha, so tenderly described.

― roxymuzak (roxymuzak), Friday, 2 September 2005 17:27 (nineteen years ago)

Also: I do these literally all the time. My vagina is like the Schwarzenneger of vaginas.

― roxymuzak (roxymuzak), Friday, 2 September 2005 17:30 (nineteen years ago)

Does it bark with an Austrian accent? (I shouldn't have posted this, huh?)

― M. White (Miguelito), Friday, 2 September 2005 17:31 (nineteen years ago)

And in re: guys appreciating it? Some REALLY do, some can't tell, i.e. their penises are small, or they are 2-pump chumps. Case closed.

xpost, no but it is gubernatorial. And once portrayed Conan.

― roxymuzak (roxymuzak), Friday, 2 September 2005 17:32 (nineteen years ago)

FWIW, I think it's a sublime feeling.

And once portrayed Conan.

That must have been interesting. Did it do its own stunts/swordplay?

― M. White (Miguelito), Friday, 2 September 2005 17:33 (nineteen years ago)

SWORDPLAY

― roxymuzak (roxymuzak), Friday, 2 September 2005 17:37 (nineteen years ago)

MY VAGINA CAN SLAY YOUR PUNY QUIMLET!

http://rds.yahoo.com/S=96062883/K=conan+sword/v=2/SID=e/TID=I053_87/l=IVI/SIG=1290n3u5q/EXP=1125772927/*-http%3A//ffmedia.ign.com/conan/graphics/Conan_sword.jpg

― M. White (Miguelito), Friday, 2 September 2005 17:45 (nineteen years ago)

How many at a time?

I have to admit that I don't really understand this part of the original post. Is it possible to do more than one Kegel at a time?! Is there MORE THAN ONE WAY TO KEGEL?

― roxymuzak (roxymuzak), Friday, 2 September 2005 17:45 (nineteen years ago)

I do these semi-regularly. Supposed to help you with bladder control when you're an old lady.

― pee ƒur¥ (Je4nne Fury), Friday, 2 September 2005 17:45 (nineteen years ago)

That's true for the menfolk too, Je4nne.

― M. White (Miguelito), Friday, 2 September 2005 17:46 (nineteen years ago)

that explains why I can hold it for like 700 years.

― roxymuzak (roxymuzak), Friday, 2 September 2005 17:57 (nineteen years ago)

ROXY I LOVE YOU

― n/a (Nick A.), Friday, 2 September 2005 17:59 (nineteen years ago)

ME TOO

ihttp://images.barnesandnoble.com/images/8970000/8977714.jpg

― Jordan (Jordan), Friday, 2 September 2005 18:00 (nineteen years ago)

Imagine a girl who never pees and can fence with her vagina...

― n/a (Nick A.), Friday, 2 September 2005 18:01 (nineteen years ago)

...plus if you're famished and all you have is a walnut but don't have a nutcracker in the house...

― oops (Oops), Friday, 2 September 2005 18:08 (nineteen years ago)

Well, never peeing she'd probably go septic.

― roxymuzak (roxymuzak), Friday, 2 September 2005 18:09 (nineteen years ago)

SO worth it.

― Secundus Covariant (s_clover), Friday, 2 September 2005 18:20 (nineteen years ago)

2 pump chump! Ha ha!

― tokyo nursery school: afternoon session (rosemary), Friday, 2 September 2005 19:11 (nineteen years ago)

someone tell me how to do this? i have a feeling my vagina is out of shape

― Homosexual II (Homosexual II), Friday, 2 September 2005 19:41 (nineteen years ago)

Just tighten it up! Repeatedly! Squeeze those muscles! Kind of like if you're trying to keep from peeing.

― roxymuzak (roxymuzak), Friday, 2 September 2005 19:46 (nineteen years ago)

taint no thing

― OMG (Haikunym), Friday, 2 September 2005 20:18 (nineteen years ago)

so is the idea that you tighten up your vadge while a guy is doin' ya?

― Homosexual II (Homosexual II), Friday, 2 September 2005 20:20 (nineteen years ago)

Yes. It's like being gripped firmly by a warm hand.

― roxymuzak (roxymuzak), Friday, 2 September 2005 20:21 (nineteen years ago)

I HAD BETTER PRACTICE FOR MY FUTURE HUSBNAND!!

― Homosexual II (Homosexual II), Friday, 2 September 2005 20:29 (nineteen years ago)

Yes. It's like being gripped firmly by a warm hand.

All of these came to mind:

"How do you do?"

"No. No. I assure you the pleasure is all mine. That is to say, I hope it's not."

"Enchantée. Vraiment."

"Madam, I am honored."

― M. White (Miguelito), Friday, 2 September 2005 20:32 (nineteen years ago)

haha

― roxymuzak (roxymuzak), Friday, 2 September 2005 20:33 (nineteen years ago)

"dentata"

http://www.smh.com.au/news/world/controversy-in-south-africa-over-device-to-snare-rapists/2005/09/01/1125302683893.html

― rogermexico (rogermexico), Friday, 2 September 2005 20:46 (nineteen years ago)

We don't need these nut-case devices..." Ms Smith said.

― rogermexico (rogermexico), Friday, 2 September 2005 20:48 (nineteen years ago)

Yikes!!!

― M. White (Miguelito), Friday, 2 September 2005 20:58 (nineteen years ago)

Yes. The potential for misuse is terrifying. We must speak out!

Still, nut-case devices...

Oh, but: kegels good!

― rogermexico (rogermexico), Friday, 2 September 2005 21:05 (nineteen years ago)

Classic for staying awake in really boring meetings, much better than, say, pinching your arms -- and no one can tell!

― Laurel, Friday, 2 September 2005 22:06 (nineteen years ago)

They can if they hear the nut cracking.

― Penelope_111 (Penelope_111), Friday, 2 September 2005 23:53 (nineteen years ago)

Well, yes, but the really awkward part is fishing out the pieces of shell. Because you REALLY don't want to leave any behind.

― Laurel, Friday, 2 September 2005 23:57 (nineteen years ago)

heh heh. Nut cracking.

― Trayce (trayce), Saturday, 3 September 2005 03:02 (nineteen years ago)

I remember reading about different sorts of imaginative Kegel exercises (for the ladies) in a book... One was the "straw exercise", where you put a straw in your pussy and imagine your drinking through it. The other one was the "lift exercise", where you imagine your vagina as a lift that goes to floor one, then stops, goes to floor two, then stops, goes to floor three, etc.

― Tuomas (Tuomas), Saturday, 3 September 2005 08:52 (nineteen years ago)

For guys isn't it simply just making it 'bounce' like your knob is the front end of a car w hydraulix? And many men, many many many many men, will admit that it was way easier to do it as a teen - 'WOW my shit is ROCK, and it's agile like a philippino deejay... yo if my cock were a car it'd win sooo many competitions...hey, that means my dick is TOTALLY hip-hop!"

Then you get a bit worried after you've done too many drugs and you can't 'go hydro' anymore, but I think playing it clean a week or two will restore your ups.

― Cum Fiesta No Siesta (LeCoq), Saturday, 3 September 2005 09:23 (nineteen years ago)

BOOMBACLAAT JOKEZORS!

Wotchu calla duurty lil poom poom dat git torn out frame straight up and down too many time?

VAGINA DUNDATTA

BAKAA!

― LeCoq (LeCoq), Saturday, 3 September 2005 09:40 (nineteen years ago)

Aw crap the way I wrote the last word makes it sound more like that high pitched crow sound Jadakiss makes all the time. But that's not what I wanted, all I wanted was everything else, all at once, but they wouldn't give it to me, just one pepsi

― LeCoq (LeCoq), Saturday, 3 September 2005 09:42 (nineteen years ago)

two years pass...

my dick is TOTALLY hip-hop!"

― carne asada, Thursday, 3 April 2008 20:32 (seventeen years ago)

three years pass...

I thought we'd discussed about this before, and then i remember it was on this (rather awkwardly titled) thread. It was there where I learned that the male Kegels are the ones use if you want to delay coming. Since I'm slow to come anyway I don't think I need to exercise for that reason, but I guess there are other benefits, such as bladder control come old age.
I remember reading about different sorts of imaginative Kegel exercises (for the ladies) in a book... One was the "straw exercise", where you put a straw in your pussy and imagine your drinking through it. The other one was the "lift exercise", where you imagine your vagina as a lift that goes to floor one, then stops, goes to floor two, then stops, goes to floor three, etc.

― Tuomas (Tuomas), Saturday, September 3, 2005 1:52 AM (5 years ago)

― it's a meme i made and i like (Steve Shasta), Thursday, 23 June 2011 06:38 (fourteen years ago)

Yes, that is indeed a post I posted in September 3rd, 2005. That was me.

― Tuomas, Thursday, 23 June 2011 11:07 (fourteen years ago)

http://ecx.images-amazon.com/images/I/51vidFzAfsL._SS500_.jpg

― 40% chill and 100% negative (Tracer Hand), Thursday, 23 June 2011 12:12 (fourteen years ago)

where you imagine your vagina as a lift
http://www.dlisted.com/files/areyoubeingservedsadness1.jpg
Ground floor perfumery,
stationery and leather goods,
wigs and haberdashery
kitchenware and food...going up

First floor telephones,
gents ready-made suits,
shirts, socks, ties, hats,
underwear and shoes...going up

Second floor carpets,
travel goods and bedding,
material, soft furnishings,
restaurant and teas. Going down

― wtf is wrong with people? (snoball), Thursday, 23 June 2011 12:54 (fourteen years ago)

your vagina is a lift and you live on the 48th floor

http://www.oneinchpunch.net/wordpress/wp-content/uploads/2007/01/michaelwolf_hk.jpg

― dayo, Thursday, 23 June 2011 12:57 (fourteen years ago)

...of the House of 1000 Arseholes
http://farm4.static.flickr.com/3610/3424747195_048a82bec7.jpg

― wtf is wrong with people? (snoball), Thursday, 23 June 2011 13:04 (fourteen years ago)

I think that in yoga you are supposed to do one long kegel--or "lock the mula bandha"--but I always forget and/or can't be bothered to do it unless the teacher reminds me. And then I forget again soon after. Sorry gentlemen.

― Virginia Plain, Thursday, 23 June 2011 14:05 (fourteen years ago)

Kind of miss rumpie's weird inpropriety.

― I don't know who Cerebus is, and I'm 6'0 and 192 (Nicole), Thursday, 23 June 2011 14:36 (fourteen years ago)

She still shows up every now and then.

― Mr. Patrick Batman (WmC), Thursday, 23 June 2011 14:38 (fourteen years ago)

Sorry, I was thinking of wiggywoo

― Mr. Patrick Batman (WmC), Thursday, 23 June 2011 14:38 (fourteen years ago)

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