why the fuck did i start drinking again

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the only thing i know for sure is, it started off as a friendly lunchtime drink of vodka with the baltic neighbours. now it's monday morning and i vaguely recall something to do with cops, medical personnel, some angry gangster guys, some women i lied about my age to, and a dead squirrel. all my money is gone and there's condom wrappers, beer cans, and busted furniture all over the floor. since this all took place in my building, lying low isn't even an option, and since nobody else involved speaks english, piecing this disaster together is going to be impossible. so what the fuck do i do now

― dave q (listerine), Monday, 1 May 2006 09:27 (nineteen years ago)

you need a simple bleached blonde in your life

― nicky lo-fi (nicky lo-fi), Monday, 1 May 2006 09:35 (nineteen years ago)

I think should ask ILE what they think happened, and let us piece together the last 24hrs for you.

Could the dead squirrel possibly be some sort of Holloway Road equivalent of the Maltese Falcon?

― Matt DC (Matt DC), Monday, 1 May 2006 10:02 (nineteen years ago)

More seriously, you live right down from Gareth don't you? Could this have anything to do with it?

― Matt DC (Matt DC), Monday, 1 May 2006 10:07 (nineteen years ago)

it might, actually...but that's the part i'm least concerned about

― dave q (listerine), Monday, 1 May 2006 10:16 (nineteen years ago)

we could all write what we think happened separately and email them to Dave Q and he could average them all out.

― DV (dirtyvicar), Monday, 1 May 2006 11:01 (nineteen years ago)

you can do like I did in '86 and wander around your apartment building for a few days knocking on the same doors over and over, and saying "I know I was just here a minute ago and I'm really sorry but if you could just tell me what day today is I know I'll be able to put everything together, thanks man"

winnin' friends, influencin' ppl

― Thomas Tallis (Tommy), Monday, 1 May 2006 12:04 (nineteen years ago)

dunno, hope its nothing to do with this

http://static.flickr.com/53/138250854_e35645aba9.jpg

11 police cars and two police vans just came rushing round, and stopped in the apartment complex opposite. i think they only arrested one guy though, seemed a bit of overkill.

they're all just leaving now

― charltonlido (gareth), Monday, 1 May 2006 12:29 (nineteen years ago)

you know, im beginning to hate those stupid trees. they block my view of everything

― charltonlido (gareth), Monday, 1 May 2006 12:30 (nineteen years ago)

wasn't me, i'm not in holloway right now...i'm afraid to go back

― dave q (listerine), Monday, 1 May 2006 13:12 (nineteen years ago)

That's why they call 'em "spirits."

― King Missle, Monday, 1 May 2006 18:01 (nineteen years ago)

ihttp://www.frappr.com/?a=photo&gid=614579&pid=1753258&src=flash_slideticker

― You Drunk, Monday, 1 May 2006 20:07 (nineteen years ago)

A few drinks and those trees could be taken care of, gareth

― mike h. (mike h.), Monday, 1 May 2006 20:43 (nineteen years ago)

When you stop drinking, you stop having interesting stories involving gangsters & dead squirrels.

― jay blanchard (jay blanchard), Monday, 1 May 2006 22:40 (nineteen years ago)

I just happen to have an epitaph for the squirrel handy that I wrote for another, somewhat similar occasion. *Ahem*

What can you say about a twenty-five year old squirrel who died? That it was beautiful. And brilliant. That it loved Mozart and Bach. And the Beatles. And me.

No. Wait. Wrong pocket. Here it is. *Ahem*

Lord look on us with pity, who come here today to consign the earthly remains of this, um, squirrel, unto your benevolent hands and back into your loving bosom. O Gracious Lord, O Lord Most High, this squirrel lived a blameless life, a quiet life, innocent alike of both good and evil. We, your humble servants, can't imagine where it picked up that nasty mange, but we advise thee, O Lord, to wash thy benevolent hands as soon as possible after touching it. And You might want to reconsider that bosom idea. Think about it. We could always have it stuffed instead.

There, that should do nicely.

― Aimless (Aimless), Monday, 1 May 2006 22:49 (nineteen years ago)

some women i lied about my age to

Well, how old ARE you?

14?

― Beth Parker (Beth Parker), Tuesday, 2 May 2006 01:08 (nineteen years ago)

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