The Wearing of Shorts in the Office

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should it be allowed?

― MarkH, Friday, 23 August 2002 09:19 (twenty-three years ago)

Yes.

― RickyT (RickyT), Friday, 23 August 2002 09:20 (twenty-three years ago)

The only place shorts should be allowed is on the sports field. And possibly on the beach. Otherwise NO.

― Emma, Friday, 23 August 2002 09:20 (twenty-three years ago)

I say NO! But largely because the only colleague who does this has scuzzy hirsute legs.

― MarkH, Friday, 23 August 2002 09:21 (twenty-three years ago)

Male colleague or female colleague?

― Emma, Friday, 23 August 2002 09:24 (twenty-three years ago)

If there are females present - NO.

If you have VEINY LEGzz0r and knobbly knees - NEVER re: the really quite repulsive steeeeenky old mang on the tube last night. Actually I should be more hardline and say NO. If you are too hot then SURELY air-conditioning in the modern office would solve this problem.

― Sarah (starry), Friday, 23 August 2002 09:25 (twenty-three years ago)

I made my own cut-off shorts out of an old pair of jeans. I only wear them in the house. I look like I'm ship-wrecked when I wear them.

― jel -- (jel), Friday, 23 August 2002 09:27 (twenty-three years ago)

Only if you were a jacket and tie. That's class.

― Colin Meeder (Mert), Friday, 23 August 2002 09:31 (twenty-three years ago)

NO! shorts are a fashion faux-pas, look, i even told some of you people (dr.c, toby), but would they listen? oh no! i cannot condone shorts (even brown ones)

― gareth (gareth), Friday, 23 August 2002 09:34 (twenty-three years ago)

no. the office is no place for body parts to be displayed, unless you're working in a sex shop or morgue or hospital or something.

― angela (angela), Friday, 23 August 2002 09:36 (twenty-three years ago)

who loves short shorts? no one should love short shorts. or long shorts. no one what was in the posession of a smidgen of sartorial know-how would give them the yes-vote. they are bad, bad news and signal the end of everything. everything.

― nickie (nickie), Friday, 23 August 2002 09:38 (twenty-three years ago)

There's also the question of where it will lead. If you allow shorts, then ppl will start wearing speedos, then g-strings, and it won't be long before Naturist Administrative Assistants start asserting their rights...

― MarkH, Friday, 23 August 2002 09:40 (twenty-three years ago)

We love short shorts.

The only time I've ever worn shorts in public (actually, in my OWN HOME, they were pyjamas), my pasty legs got laughed at and asked if I ever go outside (Which is stupid, cos it's not like I'd be wearing shorts anyway, but he is a twat I still have revenge fantasies over, so that figures).

So no, I would never make you suffer like that.

― Graham (graham), Friday, 23 August 2002 09:43 (twenty-three years ago)

I like wearing shorts, they keep me at a nice temperature in the heat, and let me show off my scars.

― chris (chris), Friday, 23 August 2002 09:47 (twenty-three years ago)

Smooth continental type men round southern Europe seem to manage perfectly well in their much warmer climate without resorting to the sartorial faux pas that is shorts. If you are too warm get air conditioning. If your office won't get it then have your sweat glands botoxed (I am taking a particularly hard line on the shorts issue).

― Emma, Friday, 23 August 2002 10:40 (twenty-three years ago)

I think shorts are awful and frankly I would prefer to never see any of my co-workers wearing them (or anything ever remotely revealing actually).

― Alex in SF (Alex in SF), Friday, 23 August 2002 11:04 (twenty-three years ago)

I have very nice legs, but I suspect my co-workers might not see it that way if I started wearing shorts to work.

― Martin Skidmore (Martin Skidmore), Friday, 23 August 2002 11:14 (twenty-three years ago)

92% of the human race looks disgusting in shorts, so no. I really don't want to see ugly, skanky looking legs at work, work is bad enough without all that.

― Nicole (Nicole), Friday, 23 August 2002 11:36 (twenty-three years ago)

92% is too charitable. It's closer to 99% I'd say.

― Emma, Friday, 23 August 2002 11:40 (twenty-three years ago)

How I would love NOT to wear shorts to work. Unfortunately, you have to be paid more than I to get a seat next to an AC unit. And even more to get your own office, complete with AC. So, I'm afraid I have to take a hard line.

The first time I started this - about 5 years ago - there was a protest from management. Some fool even started to intriduce a dress code. This came to nothing, I suspect once someone slightly less foolish had pointed out that it would need to be negotiated with someone as it represented a change in the terms and conditions of service and also that the Sex Discrimination Act would come into play.

― Tim Bateman, Friday, 23 August 2002 11:43 (twenty-three years ago)

I can't resist adding this: I was complimented on my legs by a woman. Unfortunately, the colour does leave something to be desired, as she did point out (it is the only thing most people notice).

― Tim Bateman, Friday, 23 August 2002 11:44 (twenty-three years ago)

Man, if 99% is UNATTRACTIVE in shorts, imagine how high that percentage leaps when you get to the completely nekkid (cause those shorts might be hiding weird patches of HAIR or strange moles or even MISSHAPEN genitalia!!! 99.9%!!! Good lord, it is a wonder any of us can stomach the sight of another human being long enough to even IMAGINE breeding, let alone actually ya know "doing it" and actually perpuating our species.

― Alex in SF (Alex in SF), Friday, 23 August 2002 11:47 (twenty-three years ago)

Alex - luckilly no two people agree on which 99.9% of the human race looks disgusting naked. Ergo, the continued existance of same.

― Tim Bateman, Friday, 23 August 2002 11:57 (twenty-three years ago)

We don't have a dress code here really but I would gladly see one introduced if it would put an end to The Culottes From Hell as worn by portly colleague. I think men should be able to wear shorts if they want to though, as long as they are not of the Bermuda or Lycra type.

― Archel (Archel), Friday, 23 August 2002 12:01 (twenty-three years ago)

The thing is that shorts have a uniquely uglifying effect on people, even people with quite beautiful bodies look crap in shorts. I just hate shorts.

― Emma, Friday, 23 August 2002 12:07 (twenty-three years ago)

Yeah, there's just something about shorts that make people look dumpy and unattractive even if they have great bodies.

― Nicole (Nicole), Friday, 23 August 2002 12:09 (twenty-three years ago)

My arch enemy could not be described as anything but a smooth continental type man and he insisted on wearing shorts around the house ew ew ew.

― Graham (graham), Friday, 23 August 2002 12:18 (twenty-three years ago)

As Dan seems not to be posting yet, may I speak for him and note that shorts (knee-length) not only can work but are a great necessity around my way, thank you very much. The various complaints are noted but shall not be acted upon.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Friday, 23 August 2002 12:39 (twenty-three years ago)

I wasn't counting you Ned, no offense was meant/intended.

― Nicole (Nicole), Friday, 23 August 2002 12:46 (twenty-three years ago)

I only look good in ultra-baggy pants or knee-length shorts.

― Dan Perry (Dan Perry), Friday, 23 August 2002 13:04 (twenty-three years ago)

I don't mind knee-length shorts in the office--I wish I could wear them for my current assignment!

― j.lu (j.lu), Friday, 23 August 2002 13:04 (twenty-three years ago)

Yess! I am so glad that people agree, SHORTS are RUB. My housemate always wears them, and he looks stupid, even moer so when he wears them with SANDALS... Thing is I am going to australia in november and I'm worried that the heat may necessitate shorts. This is giving me nightmares.

― Steve.n., Friday, 23 August 2002 13:18 (twenty-three years ago)

I don't think it has anything to do with heat. The hottest place I have been was Sri Lanka where it was pretty damned hot and there were plenty of men there who were wearing long trousers. Cover yourselves up!

― Emma, Friday, 23 August 2002 13:47 (twenty-three years ago)

I WILL NOT LISTEN TO YOUR FASCIST LEG-COVERING DOGMA.

― Dan Perry (Dan Perry), Friday, 23 August 2002 13:48 (twenty-three years ago)

Oh, just cover yourself up, Perry.

― Nicole (Nicole), Friday, 23 August 2002 13:49 (twenty-three years ago)

I will not allow you to oppress my legs. KEEP YOUR LAWS OFF OF MY GAMS.

― Dan Perry (Dan Perry), Friday, 23 August 2002 13:54 (twenty-three years ago)

I'm so glad everyone here agrees with me about how awful shorts are. I'm about to spend a week in the Nevada desert and won't be bringing shorts. I will be bringing a speedo, though.

― Sean (Sean), Friday, 23 August 2002 13:54 (twenty-three years ago)

Gams? That reminds me of that brand of pantyhose from the 80s so now I have horrible visions of Mr. Perry wearing shorts and tan tights....*sob*

― Nicole (Nicole), Friday, 23 August 2002 13:59 (twenty-three years ago)

I get a kick out of my legs... AND IT SHOWS.

― Dan Perry (Dan Perry), Friday, 23 August 2002 14:00 (twenty-three years ago)

I wasn't counting you Ned, no offense was meant/intended.

Oh heavens, I wasn't mad! :-) Fret not -- but this is further proof of the power of smileys and the problems their lack can cause. ;-)

I'm so glad everyone here agrees with me about how awful shorts are.

So Dan and I don't count? *SOBS*

I'm about to spend a week in the Nevada desert

Say hi to my housemate Danielle for me (I'm assuming you speak of Burning Man, natch).

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Friday, 23 August 2002 14:09 (twenty-three years ago)

will be bringing a speedo, though.

Surely speedo = 100*all attributes of shorts + skin-tight? How can you advocate that and not regular shorts?

(I fear I may have inadvertently answered my own question there...)

― Dan Perry (Dan Perry), Friday, 23 August 2002 14:11 (twenty-three years ago)

(At any rate, speedos in the office = AAAARGH MY EYES!!!!!!)

― Dan Perry (Dan Perry), Friday, 23 August 2002 14:12 (twenty-three years ago)

Only Alex from BB3 should wear Speedos in the office, and only if it were my office.

― Nicole (Nicole), Friday, 23 August 2002 14:14 (twenty-three years ago)

I don't know why I wrote that, momentary insanity. I don't even like speedos!

― Nicole (Nicole), Friday, 23 August 2002 14:16 (twenty-three years ago)

Nicole's secret lust revealed! Better that than if she said Jade in Speedos, if that's even a legit concept.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Friday, 23 August 2002 14:20 (twenty-three years ago)

I saw a picture of him without a shirt yesterday, sorry. Do not tell non-ILX Dan.

― Nicole (Nicole), Friday, 23 August 2002 14:22 (twenty-three years ago)

It wouldn't have been high on my priority list anyway.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Friday, 23 August 2002 14:41 (twenty-three years ago)

Liar!

― J'accuse!!!! (Dan Perry), Friday, 23 August 2002 14:57 (twenty-three years ago)

Non-ILX Dan, you silly man. I trust you would still know how to read this thread. ;-)

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Friday, 23 August 2002 15:06 (twenty-three years ago)

How can you advocate that and not regular shorts?

I'm not advocating speedos, just offering it up for amusement purposes. I'm rail-thin, so I can get away with it, as much as anyone can "get away" with such a garment. Picture it with the rest of my costume: a fishnet with plastic toy fish tied on, and... well, that's it. Fetching, no?

― Sean (Sean), Friday, 23 August 2002 15:13 (twenty-three years ago)

I'm not advocating speedos, just offering it up for amusement purposes....Picture it with the rest of my costume: a fishnet with plastic toy fish tied on, and... well, that's it. Fetching, no?

Hmmm...a modern Poseidon in the middle of the desert?

― j.lu (j.lu), Friday, 23 August 2002 15:21 (twenty-three years ago)

Is this not basically a word-for-word repeat of the previous shorts thread, straight down to Emma's global tour of tropical trouser-wearing? Jesus, I think we've got it sorted out: the British hate shorts but cave occasionally, the Americans wear shorts when appropriate but don't, like, like them or anything. Except for those yacht-club types in the well-pressed khaki shorts with tucked-in knit polo tops, but I don't think any of them post here.

― nabisco (nabisco), Friday, 23 August 2002 16:08 (twenty-three years ago)

I love knee-length shorts. I have sexy calves. (MOO!)

― Dan Perry (Dan Perry), Friday, 23 August 2002 16:10 (twenty-three years ago)

if you live somewhere sunny, it's absurd to deny yourself tanned legs! they complete the look!

― boxcubed (boxcubed), Friday, 23 August 2002 17:08 (twenty-three years ago)

On the other hand, what about making shorts compulsory as office wear? I think that would be pretty funny.

― Martin Skidmore (Martin Skidmore), Friday, 23 August 2002 17:12 (twenty-three years ago)

I like shorts. They are very nice and comfortable in the summer.

― Julio Desouza (jdesouza), Friday, 23 August 2002 20:13 (twenty-three years ago)

it seems generally to be people with ugly legs who want to launch a shorts fatwa.

my legs are about my best feature and I will conyinue to show them off.

― chris (chris), Sunday, 25 August 2002 10:38 (twenty-three years ago)

chris, yes, but we will enjoy the legs better if you put this bag over yr head

― mark s (mark s), Sunday, 25 August 2002 10:48 (twenty-three years ago)

another one??

― chris (chris), Sunday, 25 August 2002 10:53 (twenty-three years ago)

I like how excited Alex got up there about the ugliness of his fellow man.

I wouldn't mind the "shorts metal"-type shorts in the office, with the chain wallets and leg tattoos and white socks and sneakers, but I don't think this is what people here have in mind.

― felicity (felicity), Sunday, 25 August 2002 17:32 (twenty-three years ago)

i hate this thread and ill make sure that if i evah go to England or the US i will wear shorts all the time and hang around at ilxers jobs. No matter how cold it is. It can be -20 degrees and ill be there with my shorts and fliflops

― Chupa-Cabras (vicc13), Sunday, 25 August 2002 17:41 (twenty-three years ago)

I don't think I've ever worn shorts in years, but still.... JESUS! Lighten up, people. There are far worse fashion atrocities that many of you surely recommend.

― donut bitch, Sunday, 25 August 2002 17:58 (twenty-three years ago)

haha fashion atrocities... I was ranting at work one day about the worst male fashion atrocity being wearing a shirt and tie with jeans, and a colleague said "What's wrong with that? That's what I wear at weekends." And suit-type trousers with shirt and tie topped with a denim jacket is about as rubbish. The worst clothes thing women do is wearing a skirt with a split up one side, then walking around leaning slightly to that side holding the split together because otherwise someone might see their thigh.

― Martin Skidmore (Martin Skidmore), Sunday, 25 August 2002 18:26 (twenty-three years ago)

Flip-flops at the office in the summer are my favorite job perk. I just sit at a computer all day, so no one much minds if I wear them, hooray! I don't wear shorts to work, but that's mostly because it's just as easy to wear a skirt; also my office is always FREEZING all year. Perhaps the answer to this debate is Utilikilts for men who would otherwise wear shorts. ; )

― lyra (lyra), Sunday, 25 August 2002 18:48 (twenty-three years ago)

what about capri pants!

― boxcubed (boxcubed), Sunday, 25 August 2002 18:56 (twenty-three years ago)

I wish I'd worn SHORTS today, it's really hot.

The drinking of shorts in the office: classic or dud?

― Tom (Groke), Sunday, 25 August 2002 19:07 (twenty-three years ago)

You mean like wringing out the sweat? Ew. Sounds like soemthing only a Crouch Ender would do.

― Graham (graham), Sunday, 25 August 2002 19:13 (twenty-three years ago)

This thread is so bizarre. I had no idea whatsoever that so many people were so violently opposed to shorts. I'm sure nearly everyone at my workplace wears shorts in the summer sometimes. I don't really find normal human legs that repulsive. (It might have something to do with 98% of my coworkers being under 30, probably 80% under 25. But I don't know.) I mean, it was getting around 40 degrees C with the humidex a week or two ago.

― sundar subramanian, Sunday, 25 August 2002 22:36 (twenty-three years ago)

how about BICYCLE SHORTS ? Only leggings are as bad.

― electric sound of jim (electricsound), Sunday, 25 August 2002 23:22 (twenty-three years ago)

Sundar: this is exactly what I found in toronto. Most ppl wore shorts and there was nothing to it. But here in the UK it seems to be much different.

― Julio Desouza (jdesouza), Monday, 26 August 2002 11:28 (twenty-three years ago)

the shirt tie jeans thing is indeed horrible

and you see sooooooo often here. what do those ppl trying to say?
it's the seveties jeans type who's getting older and thinks he looks more responsible with a tie, but can't get rid of the jeans? maybe it's a way of trying to attract young chicks. I don't know.

― erik, Monday, 26 August 2002 11:45 (twenty-three years ago)

shorts are ugly on probably 99% of men but only about 50% of women. They're so convenient though.

― Maria (Maria), Monday, 26 August 2002 12:47 (twenty-three years ago)

Last time I wore shorts was on holiday because it was just too hot, normally I find flared trousers to be quite well ventilated in summer. Alternatively I sleep most of the day and by night it's cool enough, or this year I moved back to Ireland and the problem never arose cos it fucking rains all the time. (except today)

― Ronan (Ronan), Monday, 26 August 2002 13:26 (twenty-three years ago)

Except for those yacht-club types in the well-pressed khaki shorts with tucked-in knit polo tops, but I don't think any of them post here.

ahem!!!

― Dave M. (rotten03), Monday, 26 August 2002 15:50 (twenty-three years ago)

Shorts are for all seasons. The office is AC, the underground path is AC, the train is AC. Hell I'd wear them even with my lovely soccer tan (tan lines just below my knees).

― Mr Noodles (Mr Noodles), Monday, 26 August 2002 15:56 (twenty-three years ago)

AAAAAAAAUGGGGGH!! UTILIKILTS!

A POX on fashion in Seattle. I'm cursed to see at least two a week. LYRA, SAVE US!

― donut bitch (donut), Monday, 26 August 2002 17:19 (twenty-three years ago)

I ahem sort of like the jeans-and-tie thing, but not in the stand-up comedian way (cf black jeans, white sneakers on anyone but Robert Smith) -- I like the combo in the sort of young-academic way, where it's like jeans, shirt/tie, corduroy jacket with elbow patches. Obviously this is super-hard to pull off, so I don't personally try it. Although last year, back when everyone was hating on the Strokes, I decided it would be funny to dress like the missing "fancy Stroke," so I did flared cords, Chuck Taylors, untucked button-down shirt and loose black tie (haha see I did untucked shirt and tie!), and a blazer. I think it looked pretty lovely, actually, but I'm not making a habit of it.

― nabisco (nabisco), Monday, 26 August 2002 17:34 (twenty-three years ago)

I sometimes wear an untucked short-sleeved whirt shirt with the top button undone with a red tie tied really loosely with earthy brownish-green jeans (? canvas, maybe). I like the way it looks and so do some other people so pffft.

― sundar subramanian, Monday, 26 August 2002 17:40 (twenty-three years ago)

Sheesh, some of you pro-short people are so touchy. I just think they look pretty bad, it's not like I propose rounding up shorts wearers and sending them off to live on an island with platypus.

― Nicole (Nicole), Monday, 26 August 2002 19:56 (twenty-three years ago)

Yeah, but now the idea has come up...

― Martin Skidmore (Martin Skidmore), Monday, 26 August 2002 19:59 (twenty-three years ago)

Please can we all wear ties with untucked shirts from now on?

― nabisco (nabisco), Monday, 26 August 2002 20:01 (twenty-three years ago)

You shouldn't have mentioned stand up comedian Nitsuh, now I'll keep thinking you dress like Seinfeld.

― Nicole (Nicole), Monday, 26 August 2002 20:03 (twenty-three years ago)

But I said NOT in the standup way! Plus have you ever seen Seinfeld with his shirt untucked?

― nabisco (nabisco), Monday, 26 August 2002 20:10 (twenty-three years ago)

I know, but you said stand up before you went into detail discussing the neo-Strokes garb.

― Nicole (Nicole), Monday, 26 August 2002 20:21 (twenty-three years ago)

It's like imprinting, see.

― Nicole (Nicole), Monday, 26 August 2002 20:23 (twenty-three years ago)

I think it's usually a dud, unless your office is a Fed-Ex or UPS truck.

― rosemary (rosemary), Monday, 26 August 2002 20:25 (twenty-three years ago)

Nabisco = the new Seinfeld = bad bass solos follow him wherever he goes, along with his 'quirky' friends who burst into his apartment to spout irrelevancies = Nabisco's despairing suicide.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Monday, 26 August 2002 20:27 (twenty-three years ago)

MUST-SEE TV!!!

― Dan Perry (Dan Perry), Monday, 26 August 2002 21:03 (twenty-three years ago)

three months pass...

Shorts with a jacket? Definitely not!

But with a tie? Well, er... How about the following 'ensemble'?

Shorts: The plain, single-colour (i.e. black or dark blue), smart, tailored variety, finishing between just above the knee and mid thigh.

Shirt: The plain, single-colour (i.e. white or light blue) 'office' type, WORN TUCKED INTO THE SHORTS! Either short-sleeved or with long sleeves carefully folded up army-style to just above the elbow.

Tie: Single-colour, or two or three sober colours. Design neither too complicated nor too gaudy.

Socks: Plain, white, with turnover tops, and finishing just below the knee.

Shoes: Black leather.

Avoid at all costs: (i) Sandals! Need I say more? (ii) The colour grey. Too many echoes of school uniform! (iii) Bow ties!

Has the advantage of not showing too much bare leg. Would look okay on a woman. (Or would it look too schoolgirlish with the long socks?) But, smart or stupid? I can't decide. It's for the court of public opinion to bring in its verdict!

― D.W., Friday, 13 December 2002 15:56 (twenty-three years ago)

one year passes...

I wear shorts to work. i live in the snow and wear shorts year round because it is much more comfortable. I have very nice legs and women let me know. My friends say I am the only one who can get away with wearing short shorts for men. I buy shorts with a 2" to 3" inseam but I dont wear those to work but everywhere else. I feel great and dont follow fashion, well that was the fashion inthe 70's. I love cutoffs to!!

― Speeds Man, Sunday, 22 February 2004 04:19 (twenty-two years ago)

one year passes...

This is the best piece of ILX mail I've ever received:

Hello!

I'm from Germany and I wear shorts year round. But in our region it is not common to wear shorts between middle of octobre an the beginning of april. So we now are a small group of people who like wearing shorts year round. Our ONLY interest is to wear shorts, this is nothing sexual and we are woman and men .

On your site The Wearing of Shorts in the Office the last post from February 22nd 2004 is obvioursly someone who also likes wearing shorts even in winter time. Please send this e-mail to that person (if you know the adress) so perhaps I will get an answer.

Thank you!

Gerold

(I found your site on google "wear shorts year round")

― Andrew (enneff), Tuesday, 30 August 2005 00:03 (twenty years ago)

Andrew you have warmed my heart on a very difficult day - thank you so very much, seriously

― Banana Nutrament (ghostface), Tuesday, 30 August 2005 00:14 (twenty years ago)

OMG!

― walter kranz (walterkranz), Tuesday, 30 August 2005 00:16 (twenty years ago)

START "I LOVE SHORT PANTS"

― the food has a top snake of 1 (ex machina), Tuesday, 30 August 2005 00:32 (twenty years ago)

Thank goodness it's not sexual.

― Tracer Hand (tracerhand), Tuesday, 30 August 2005 00:49 (twenty years ago)

Our ONLY interest is to wear shorts, this is nothing sexual and we are woman and men.

― Leon C. (Ex Leon), Tuesday, 30 August 2005 00:52 (twenty years ago)

two years pass...

The only place shorts should be allowed is on the sports field. And possibly on the beach. Otherwise NO.
-- Emma, Friday, August 23, 2002 4:20 AM (5 years ago) Bookmark Link

NO! shorts are a fashion faux-pas, look, i even told some of you people (dr.c, toby), but would they listen? oh no! i cannot condone shorts (even brown ones)
-- gareth (gareth), Friday, August 23, 2002 4:34 AM (5 years ago) Bookmark Link

In the office? No. Of course not! But really, are these not the 2 most uptight posters ever, or are these the two most uptight posters ever?

Shorts are the thing that get me through the misery of summer, both in that they keep me from overheating and in that they free calves, toned during a long winter on the Stairmaster, from their pant-shackles.

― Jesse, Thursday, 13 March 2008 05:27 (eighteen years ago)

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