Dear [record company], please release [song] by [artist] as a single. Thanks.

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1. Dear Buena Vista Records, please release "The Math" by Hillary Duff as a single. If you do, it will be my #1 single of the year, despite being produced by The Matrix, for which I have no great love. Until now. Because this song is fab ace brill and geir. Thanks.

― Haikunym (Haikunym), Saturday, 1 November 2003 21:27 (twenty-two years ago)

for WHOM i have no great love

"geir" as adjective?!

― amateur!st (amateurist), Saturday, 1 November 2003 21:33 (twenty-two years ago)

doesn't "Regulate" note that the rhythm is the bass and the rest is hongro?

― Anthony Miccio (Anthony Miccio), Saturday, 1 November 2003 21:39 (twenty-two years ago)

if 'The Matrix' was
an individual, am,
maybe I'd agree

but they are a group,
kinda machine-like, and so
I stand by my choice

― Haikunym (Haikunym), Saturday, 1 November 2003 22:13 (twenty-two years ago)

Hillary Dufftronics is hongro for a generation!

― Little Johnny Jewel, Saturday, 1 November 2003 22:14 (twenty-two years ago)

oh it's confusing
jam3s bl0unt's email address now
someone else's "name"

― Haikunym (Haikunym), Saturday, 1 November 2003 22:17 (twenty-two years ago)

i still think it'd be WHOM

― amateur!st (amateurist), Saturday, 1 November 2003 22:19 (twenty-two years ago)

"the beatles, which i adore" vs. "the beatles, whom i adore"

― amateur!st (amateurist), Saturday, 1 November 2003 22:19 (twenty-two years ago)

he means gear

― the surface noise (electricsound), Saturday, 1 November 2003 22:20 (twenty-two years ago)

it's too bad record companies don't push the sales of cd singles. if they did, they would be millionares! i would buy some if they were esily found and 3 dollars a piece and had extra super special bonus tracks on them cuz i am too lazy and old to download music from the internet. and i'm only one person! there must be more like me. oh well. they will all have to die and go back to accounting and porn production instead.

― scott seward, Saturday, 1 November 2003 22:23 (twenty-two years ago)

Dear Zuma, please release "Blood On Your Hands" by Killing Joke as a single. Thanks.

It's way better than the already malevolently magnificent "Seeing Red," and so far above "Loose Cannon" that its ears must be popping. It also handily showcases (a) Dave Grohl's drum battery (b) Geordie Walker's signature riffage (c) Jaz's socio-policitcal consciousness well to the fore (and predicted Diana's murder conspiracy plot well before "A Royal Duty" hit bookstore shelves!

― Alex in NYC (vassifer), Saturday, 1 November 2003 22:36 (twenty-two years ago)

Dear Sony. Please Release "Quicksand" by Travis as a single. Thanks!

― Geir Hongro (GeirHong), Saturday, 1 November 2003 22:38 (twenty-two years ago)

Dear A&M Universal,

Please refrain from your decision to release "Whenever I Say Your Name" by Sting and Mary J. Blige as a single.
I have already decided not to acknowledge the existence of that particular song, much as I did ten years ago when Sting collaborated with bryan adams and rod stewart on that miserable piece of crap titled "all for love".
Either "Never Coming Home" or "Inside" would make much better choices.

sincerely,

baht

― bahtology, Saturday, 1 November 2003 22:46 (twenty-two years ago)

Dear EMI, how about finally letting us have Pink Floyd's "Scream Thy Last Scream" / "Vegetable Man", eh?

― Stewart Osborne (Stewart Osborne), Saturday, 1 November 2003 23:18 (twenty-two years ago)

Dear DreamWorks, please release Eels' "The Medication is Wearing Off" as a CD single so I can beat E violently over the head with the jewel case.

― Curt1s St3ph3ns, Saturday, 1 November 2003 23:28 (twenty-two years ago)

Dear Stewart, I have said acetate under my ass at this very moment. I am moving about in my chair, bopping along to Shakin' Stevens, and am afraid the resulting damage to the disc has rendered the recordings unfit for release. Hope this is in order.

― EMI, Saturday, 1 November 2003 23:32 (twenty-two years ago)

"Blind acceptance is a sign
Of stupid fools who stand in line
Like...."

― Stewart Osborne (Stewart Osborne), Saturday, 1 November 2003 23:40 (twenty-two years ago)

Or to put it another way:

http://images.amazon.com/images/P/B0000508JE.01._PE_SCMZZZZZZZ_.jpg

― Stewart Osborne (Stewart Osborne), Saturday, 1 November 2003 23:46 (twenty-two years ago)

dear rawkus, please release soundbombing by dilated&tash as a single, thanks love ron

― ron (ron), Sunday, 2 November 2003 01:17 (twenty-two years ago)

But The Matrix is
a collective noun, unlike
the Beatles. Or Geir!*

*love ya Ams I know you're right.

― Haikunym (Haikunym), Sunday, 2 November 2003 01:58 (twenty-two years ago)

shady records
hey lady
obie trice

― mark p (Mark P), Monday, 3 November 2003 05:29 (twenty-two years ago)

(although with the album tanking and em having a guest spot on hey lady its pretty likely anyway)

― mark p (Mark P), Monday, 3 November 2003 05:29 (twenty-two years ago)

Dear XL records, please release "Plug It In" by Basement Jaxx feat JC Chasez as a singles. Thanks.

― Nick H, Monday, 3 November 2003 13:27 (twenty-two years ago)

Dear Virgin records, please release "Fire Island" by Fountains Of Wayne as a single. Thanks.

(Btw. I was surprised to find this album was released on Virgin - their last ever CD not to have copy protection?)

― Geir Hongro (GeirHong), Monday, 3 November 2003 14:27 (twenty-two years ago)

Assuming you lot already own these songs, why are you desperate for them released as singles?

― DJ Mencap (DJ Mencap), Monday, 3 November 2003 14:30 (twenty-two years ago)

Dear Interscope Records, please release Beck's "Dirty Dirty" as a single. It's the bestest song in the whole world. Thanks, bye.

― nickalicious (nickalicious), Monday, 3 November 2003 14:34 (twenty-two years ago)

"Assuming you lot already own these songs, why are you desperate for them released as singles?"

I've only got a rather nasty hissy bootleg containing versions of "Scream Thy Last Scream" and "Vegetable Man" which I believe come from a BBC radio session rather than the proper studio recordings.

― Stewart Osborne (Stewart Osborne), Monday, 3 November 2003 14:36 (twenty-two years ago)

Assuming you lot already own these songs, why are you desperate for them released as singles?"

Because I want to share my love with the world.

― Nick H, Monday, 3 November 2003 14:47 (twenty-two years ago)

Nick H OTM.

― cis (cis), Monday, 3 November 2003 14:48 (twenty-two years ago)

Dear Warp, please release Broadcast's 'Before We Begin' as a single. Actually it's too late now it would've been a perfect September release and I have a video idea in my head and everything. Dammit.

― stevem (blueski), Monday, 3 November 2003 15:00 (twenty-two years ago)

"I've only got a rather nasty hissy bootleg containing versions of "Scream Thy Last Scream" and "Vegetable Man" which I believe come from a BBC radio session rather than the proper studio recordings."

That's different, you don't count so as you were...

"Because I want to share my love with the world."

Fair enough... I wasn't being rude, I'm just curious as to who gives a shit about the singles charts these days. When I was 15, 16 I desperately wanted my favourite bands of the moment to get in the top 40 for exactly that reason. Now I've either realised that there's no hope of this or don't even notice when it does happen.

― DJ Mencap (DJ Mencap), Monday, 3 November 2003 15:08 (twenty-two years ago)

I'm just curious as to who gives a shit about the singles charts these days.

Have a look here.

― Nick H, Monday, 3 November 2003 15:11 (twenty-two years ago)

"That's different, you don't count"

I am SO sick of people telling me that! < sobs >

― Stewart Osborne (Stewart Osborne), Monday, 3 November 2003 15:14 (twenty-two years ago)

Dear Sony,

Please release "Yes" by Beyonce as a single. You can remix it so that it's a bit faster for radio, that's okay with me. But please, that song needs to be a single.

― Matthew Perpetua (Matthew Perpetua), Monday, 3 November 2003 15:43 (twenty-two years ago)

Dear me.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Monday, 3 November 2003 15:44 (twenty-two years ago)

William is a glowing beacon in a bad world, even if I can't share his enthusiasm myself. And I liked the pictures, natch.

― DJ Mencap (DJ Mencap), Monday, 3 November 2003 16:03 (twenty-two years ago)

In a perfect world, there were much more lax regulations on lyrical content on radio stations and Fishbone released "Lyin' Ass Bitch" right after "Party at Ground Zero" and it went to #1 on da charts with it's "lying piece of sack of shit, slut trashcan scum is dirtbag BIIAHAIAIATCH!" coda.

― nickalicious (nickalicious), Monday, 3 November 2003 16:05 (twenty-two years ago)

"Dear me."

Is that a track from "Ned Raggett Reads the Almanac"?

― Stewart Osborne (Stewart Osborne), Monday, 3 November 2003 17:19 (twenty-two years ago)

That's the bonus track.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Monday, 3 November 2003 17:37 (twenty-two years ago)

Dear Sony,
Remember the various artists cover of "what's going on?"
For the love of God, TAKE IT BACK!!!!!!

― Felcher (Felcher), Monday, 3 November 2003 22:05 (twenty-two years ago)

RCA
"Just Missed the Train"
Kelly Clarkson

― Sam J. (samjeff), Tuesday, 4 November 2003 01:07 (twenty-two years ago)

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