This is the thread to post vain douchebag Harmony Central reviews

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I frequent Harmony Central daily, as much for the unintentional comedy of its reviews as for consumer value. I'm always delighted and astounded that there is a bottomless pool of people trying to be serious but coming off hysterically. Today, we have the investment banker from Connecticut reviewing the pricey Klon Centaur. He's determined to tell the world how upscale he is. Bow before his wealth, success and intelligence! Of course, there's always a chance it's a clever parody of the Centaur reviews or a Joe job to get at someone of the same name.

KLON CENTAUR
Price Paid: N/A

Ease of Use: 10
Hello! My name is Lee Moore and I'm a member of the Seymour Duncan Forum, Les Paul Forum and Fender Forum. You can find me there under the handles: Lee_Moore and dlmooreiii.

Since most people don't submit their names with their reviews, I'm changing the trend and am going to tell you about myself before I talk about the Klon.

First, I'm an Investment Banker in NYC and I live/commute from CT. I used to be a full-time musician (~11 years ago) and have played on and off with bands throughout the last decade.

In my childood youth (8-18), I was a Jazz Drummer for 10 years and a good one at that; I hit professional at 17. During that peiod, I became very akin to hearing fine Classical, Jazz and Fushion music. My instructor, Robin Beauchamp (Savannah, GA) is a world class Trumpet Player and he was heavy into the Yellowjacks, Chick Corea, Dave Weckle, Brecker Brothers, & various members of the soon to be "GRP Allstars".

My highschool Quintet started playing that type of music as freshmen and they only got harder as the years passed by - songs such Spain, Storm Warning, Oleo, Cherokee, you name it. If it was fushion and hard, we did it.

So my taste for difficult music, tone and mix of instruments in a band is still very fine tuned. I say this because my review of the Klon is coming from a very "skilled and versed drummer, as well as a decent guitar player". I believe that I hear the fine nuances of tone and texture - hence, I have a good feel for the Klon and its capabilities.

East of Use:
Extremely straight forward and just having all the knobs at Unity is a perfect setup for 99% of rigs.

Sound Quality: 10
The Sound Quality is unmatched for its intended purpose. The intended purpose is to get inside of the amp you're using and "add more of it". It is not a circuit designed to create its own distortion and color your amp in a different way - it is a circuit that will give you more or less of your amp's tone and output. That is it; nothing more, nothing less.

So what is the advantage of having this circuit?
Well, if you have a kick-ass amp that you prefer to plug straight into (nothing in between), this is perfect pedal for you if you want unadulterated clean volume, additional treble or more of the AMP's gain. Again, if you turn on the Klon, you are ONLY getting more of the amp's tone, nothing else. The Klon does not have a color of its own.


So, what is an example of using the Klon?
At the moment, I'm using a 2006 "Fully Customized" '59 VOS with Custom Shop "Duane Allman Clones" from Maricela Juarez. The guitar also has a Tonepros Locking Bridge, 6100 Frets, Ivory Nut and a full RS Relics Super Pot Setup (all pot values are over 600K). The RS Set also includes their new Hovland (made for RS) Musicaps at .015 neck and .020 bridge. A superb combination if I say so.

For amps, I'm running a 50W Blockhead w/ EL34's and an SLO 100 with the Haynes, Demartini and Depth Mod.

For cabinets, I'm using two Blockhead 2x12's loaded with JBL D120F's, as well as a Blockhead 4x12 with the new Celestion Heritage 20W Clone's.

Plugging my VOS '59 into the Klon and then the SLO and Blockhead produced absolutely stunning results. If anyone has heard Warren Haynes tone via Gov't Mule, the Klon and SLO absolutely nail Warren's tone (regardless of which pickups you're using). I can pull all of my recent bootlegs of Gov't Mule and can get his live lead tone extremely easily with running the SLO preamp gain at 3, master volume at 5 and having all the Klon's controls at Unity. When you engage the Klon, you suddeny have his version of "Living Loving (Maid)" from Led Zeppelin. And, depending on how he's feeling that night (Live Setting) in terms of going high-gain or low gain, you can get the same tone (Klon engaged) as Bad little Doggie, Blind Man in the Dark and various solos throughout the show. It is just awesome because I recently bought that SLO used from a friend and it sounds phenomenal.

Running the Klon through the Blockhead, we just demo-ed it on the clean channel, which works like a standard '68 50W Marshall as you turn the Volume Up. With the Volume at 4-5 on the Blockhead, you get a great clean tone that is on the verge of breaking up. When you engage the Klon, with the Gain dimed and the Level and Tone at Unity, the amp turns into a Marshall Flame Thrower!!! All the sudden we had more gain than we knew what to do with!!! It was just phenomenal. I ended up pulling the gain back to Unity, but it was so cool to hear the maximum gain from a 50W Marshall with the click of a switch.

Why was their so much gain?

Many people say that the Klon is a wimpy overdrive with no gain whatsoever. Well, if you understand that the Klon's circuit attaches itself to the internal circuit of the amp, you'll realize that IF there is natural Tube distortion hiding in the "Clean Channel" of the Amp, the Klon will find it and absolutely exploit it! Same thing with the lead channel. If you have a mild crunch on the lead channel, the Klon will find the rest of the gain and really maximize it.

Ossie at Blockhead (and I) were absolutely amazed at how much gain popped from the Clean Channel Blockhead with the volume on 4-5. It was stunning and Ossie (owner of Blockhead) said that he "now" understands why ALL of his professional customers (such as Steven Tyler and Brad Whitford from Aerosmith) use the Klon on their pedal boards.

Quite simply, if you are using great amps, it simply adds more of the good stuff.

And, it doesn't have to be distortion that you are adding. You can use it as a pure clean boost for weak pickups (like old Danelectro Lipstick Pickups) or as a clean boost for Jazz Amps, etc


Urnst Kouch (Urnst Kouch), Saturday, 17 June 2006 15:37 (eighteen years ago)

Don't you dare post either of my reviews!

(there's some classics on the review page for the line6 pod, I'll have a trawl through later on)

Pashmina (Pashmina), Saturday, 17 June 2006 15:55 (eighteen years ago)

He's Jimmy Page, he's Warren Haynes, he's got Blockheads and Marshalls and Soldanos. And in banking, everyone goes to the rest room when they see him coming 'cuz they know they're going to get an earful on what expensive equipment he bought and played on over the weekend.

Urnst Kouch (Urnst Kouch), Saturday, 17 June 2006 16:08 (eighteen years ago)

It's actually kind of sad -- he's written the review to be The Guitar World Interview He'll Never Do.

Colin Meeder (Mert), Saturday, 17 June 2006 17:10 (eighteen years ago)

Not to knock the Klon, but you can get all of the goodness his sensitive, exquisitely-trained drummer's ears hear in it out of one of these...

http://www.zoom.co.jp/english/products/stompbox/pd01body.gif

rogermexico (rogermexico), Saturday, 17 June 2006 19:24 (eighteen years ago)

At the moment, I'm using a 2006 "Fully Customized" '59 VOS with Custom Shop "Duane Allman Clones" from Maricela Juarez. The guitar also has a Tonepros Locking Bridge, 6100 Frets, Ivory Nut and a full RS Relics Super Pot Setup (all pot values are over 600K). The RS Set also includes their new Hovland (made for RS) Musicaps at .015 neck and .020 bridge. A superb combination if I say so.

This is so exquisite in its self-loving conceit, I had to look at it again. Can you imagine having to listen someone like this, even for a minute?

Urnst Kouch (Urnst Kouch), Saturday, 17 June 2006 19:32 (eighteen years ago)

The Landgraff Dynamic Overdrive brings the same sort of kooks
who spill about their Klon Centarus.

"I really enjoyed our conversation," said the reviewer of his time on the phone with God.

===========
This is truly the "Holy Grail" of overdrive pedals. I couldn't believe how amazing this pedal sounded. I got goose bumps after hitting the first chord. Then I played some blues licks and I almost cried(I kid you not). This is the sound I had been looking for so many years! I heard in my head and I finally found it. After wipping the tears from my eyes. I had to call Mr.Landgraff and thank him for doing a fantastic job. I will soon be the owner of two Landgraff pedals. I just had to order another one. They are that good!! I played it through a (2)Gibson Nightawk Customs three p/u models,(2) Fender Strats(Van Zant and Rio Grande p/u)and a ErnieBall Axis sport into a Fender twin, Marshall(2555) or Trace Elliot(twin). All the amps are tube

Reliability: 10
All Landgraff pedals use the finest parts available, Switchcraft jacks, Tantalum caps, carbon composite resistors, sip sockets, silver mica and polyester caps. And feature true bypass, 2% silver solder, with or without led, 9volt adaptor jack, custom paint(several options) and an optional tone kit(custmize your sound even more). All are hand built by John and tested by John. I don't see how this pedal could fail.

Customer Support: 10
I called John directly and we spoke over half an hour. He took the time to explaine the features and told me how I could customize the pedal, by changing components inside the unit with the bag of goodies you get with the optional tone kit. John answered all my questions in a polite and professional manner. I really enjoyed our conversation.
==============
And here's a guy who didn't actually have a Dumble Overdrive Special to review, so he made his own piece of junk and reviewed it in the Dumble section. Perhaps hoping to cadge some business from idiots.
Does it come with a Dumble badge, spelled "Dumbel" to avoid lawsuit?

Dumble Overdrive Special

$350 (for parts)
Features: 10
First off, its not a real Dumble. I could never hope to own a real one. I built this one myself. I've built 18 amps before this one...from 1/2 watt screamers to 120 bass amps...and everything in between. Most of what I've built has been in the Bassman/Plexi vein. Features: Clean Volume, T,M,B, bright sw., mid boost, clean master, drive, drive level, and presence. There are also treble, mid and bass controls for the overdrive channel, but are inside the amp on trimmers. My amp runs 2 6l6's at around 35 watts. It took weeks of changing components to get THE sound, but I did get what I wanted out of the amp.

Urnst Kouch (Urnst Kouch), Saturday, 17 June 2006 19:47 (eighteen years ago)

Old Distortion vs New Distortion or Marshall Stack vs Mesa Boogie Triple Rectifier

There is some funny Harmony Central action on this thread from ILM, including many comments from some IMM regulars.

Earl Nash (earlnash), Saturday, 17 June 2006 20:04 (eighteen years ago)

pretty much anything used, or purporting to be a version of anything used by, Jimi Hendrix or Stevie Ray Vaughan yields some pretty funny review action.

but give me any of those over the 'kid with the strat pack' versions.

b mulvey, Sunday, 18 June 2006 05:56 (eighteen years ago)

I bet I have some embarrassing reviews about gear I got 'deals' on. Now that I've sold most of it, I feel like going back and seeing just what kinda deals they were.

wes fu (aWESome), Sunday, 18 June 2006 06:33 (eighteen years ago)

There's generally a good helping of pathetic, lickspittle and bootlick in the contributions to the Kult of Keeley:

http://www.harmony-central.com/Effects/Data/Keeley/

Urnst Kouch (Urnst Kouch), Sunday, 18 June 2006 17:40 (eighteen years ago)

The Harmony Central User Reviews are always good for some roffle action.

This one is from a review of those Esteban guitars, not vain or douchebaggy but great nonetheless:

Price Paid: US $200
Features: 10
2005
Where was it made?

Features? This is a ten. It came with a HARD SHELL CASE! I couldn’t believe it, a hard shell case. Now that was different. A guitar with a hard shell case? I just wanted to leave a good review after reading all of these bad ones. This guitar is the best guitar! It comes with a hard-shell case. My other guitars didn’t. I could have guitars like Martin, Taylor, Guild, Honda, or Ford, but I don’t. This baby even came with the DVDs, a chord book AND a hard shell case.


Sound: 10
The sound quality is awesome. Have you ever hear the sound of a tree falling in a forest?

Action, Fit, & Finish: 10
Reliability/Durability? I would give this a ten.
like the other player have testified, this guitar is extremely durable with a double E.
I don’t have anything to compare it to. Maybe a car?
If I got on a bus with fourteen other people and left the station at seven. How long would it take to build this guitar?

Reliability/Durability: 9
Durability? This guitar is like a tank...a big old hairy turtle of a tank. I could surf on this thing. If I had this the day my foot was bitten off by that shark, I believe I could have gotten it back with no strings attached.
Just ROCK SOLID!

Customer Support: 9
I don’t know if I’ll live long enough to use the 'coustomer support' button that came with this guitar. I can’t play it because of that eel. After it removed the skin on my back my hands I knew I would never play the guitar again. This guitar will last for ever in that HARD SHELL CASE

Overall Rating: 10
This guitar is the best guitar! It comes with a hard-shell case. My other guitars didn’t. I could have guitars like Martin, Taylor, Guild, Honda, or Ford, but I don’t. This baby even came with the DVDs, a chord book AND a hard shell case. Soon I’ll be jamming with other satisfied customers like Cornholio to ALL the Korn tunes….maybe some Lep-lin?
A fantastic value. A lot of guitar for.....well, not a lot of money.

Submitted by Roberto Ucantwo at 03/29/2006 11:09

righteousmaelstrom (righteousmaelstrom), Monday, 19 June 2006 15:58 (eighteen years ago)

pash--i read one of your daisy reviews and knew it was you before i finished. it was a tremendous moment!

i like this guy on the richie blackmore signature strat:

Features: 10
got a good thin neck an white is the best showy color for strats playin on stage almost muddy, but gotta adjust controls on your stuff ,nobodt can ever reach ritchie,s playin never has been an equal ,no not even hendrix,but should have left the middle pickup in . just silly .its a dark guitar thick,sounding.like it one minute ,it aggravates me the next ,it sure aint trebly ,an i play it i church.nothin looks better than big headstock white. ill keep it a while ,i got stevie ray also mighty fine and more clear ,i play it more ,but of corse ritchie blows him an all other players away .scalloped frets are good but should have been jumbo like ritchie an everybody likes ,is light an still plays fair, frets are raspy gotta develop yourself to this one ,not for everybody ,light touch folks only ,like deep purple ,an rainbow music ,not for everybody,just love it like a good ballgame and enjoy ,then get back to puttin god ,jesus first an be thankful for everything good..

dan (dan), Monday, 19 June 2006 17:22 (eighteen years ago)

This guitar is the best guitar! It comes with a hard-shell case. My other guitars didn�t.

Roberto Ucantwo is my new god

Q('.'Q) (eman), Monday, 19 June 2006 19:48 (eighteen years ago)

Gig Bags

A Study In Redd Scharlach (Ken L), Monday, 19 June 2006 19:54 (eighteen years ago)

This guitar is like a tank...a big old hairy turtle of a tank.

righteousmaelstrom (righteousmaelstrom), Monday, 19 June 2006 20:27 (eighteen years ago)

One thing I've noticed at Harmony Central. Why is a certain slice of the demographic obsessed with telling everyone they play guitar in church -- or at "worship" as some call it? I don't give a shit if you play guitar in church. Decades ago my band played at a church party once and they told us to turn it down at once. So we didn't and they were so bummed they almost almost had to go poopy in their pants.

And then the church got some milchtoasts to play the music of the service on guitar. And that's about when I swore off going to the church permanently.

Urnst Kouch (Urnst Kouch), Tuesday, 20 June 2006 01:34 (eighteen years ago)

yes!! thank you!

like, wait, you play a boutique handwired class a 50 watt amp in your CHURCH BAND?

reverend rock, Tuesday, 20 June 2006 04:52 (eighteen years ago)

Do you have any idea how many American teenage boys learn to play crap guitar? And do you know that they then spend the next 10-20 years living with mum, smoking dope and lazily playing those Eddie Van Halen riffs they gleaned from Guitar Player?

Now, after half a lifetime of wayward idiocy, the only place left for the "repentant" losers to go is.....CHURCH! Moreover, the Jesus Temple provides the balding burnouts with the one venue at which they'll get anything close to resembling a "gig". (It also provides them with their one opportunity to acquire a girlfriend/wife, which is invariably some neurotic fat cow.)

Hence the large proportion of church-going guitar-reviewing gawks at Harmony Central.

I swear that this is the correct hypothesis.

Hot Hot Heat (Hot Hot Heat), Tuesday, 20 June 2006 05:14 (eighteen years ago)

The guitar forums are good for a chuckle. There are some great stereotypes there :

1) Gun totin', jack daniels swillin' southern rocker : "Hell, I wunt buy no fuckin gee-tar assembled by chinkies, no sirree-bob"

2) Wife fearin' bedroom player : "She let me have 40 minutes in the local Guitar Centre, while she had her nails done"

3) Church band guy - see previous post

4) Black Flag guy - favourite guitar is a 25 year old Tele that looks as if it has been run over by an express train and is held together by stickers. Has been on tour since 1981.

5) The tinkerer - spends all of his time worrying himself sick about minute variations in tone between the Acme chodbucker and the artist signature split-coil KK Downing-bucker. All of his 47 guitars are in pieces in his basement, but that's OK cos he can barely play anyway.

Dr.C (Dr.C), Tuesday, 20 June 2006 07:14 (eighteen years ago)

Dr., you forgot to add that Church Band Guy usually has a shiny PRS guitar and a Mesa-Boogie rig. (Though sometimes a Roland JC-120.) Church Band Guy spends top dollar for "best"-rated Sam Ash "premium" gear.

Church Band Guy is rocking for Jesus; Jesus demands the cream of the crop.

Hot Hot Heat (Hot Hot Heat), Tuesday, 20 June 2006 07:35 (eighteen years ago)

I noticed the church band thing as well, I just assumed that church gigs were regular & paid reasonably? (I know nothing about this, obv)

I trawled through some reviews, looking for howlers, but the bad ones were just depressing.

Expand on yr "kult of keeley" thing plz, mr smith! I looked at keeley's website and, uh... I don't really know what to make of it, tbh.

Pashmina (Pashmina), Tuesday, 20 June 2006 07:41 (eighteen years ago)

And I see what you mean about the cult on HC reviews, one guy complains about the mod on his tube screamer not being to his liking, but uses more words apologising to the "keeley krew" than he does addressing his complaint, wtf?

Pashmina (Pashmina), Tuesday, 20 June 2006 07:46 (eighteen years ago)

I don't believe that the church pays the church bands anything. Church Band Guys do it for the glory of god. That and lack of anything else to do.

Hot Hot Heat (Hot Hot Heat), Tuesday, 20 June 2006 07:48 (eighteen years ago)

x-post heh - yes! Church guy likes loud & shiny gear!

Dr.C (Dr.C), Tuesday, 20 June 2006 07:49 (eighteen years ago)

6) Kid-with-too-much-money guy : "hi my mom and stepdad wants to buy me a guitar after all ive been through they will spend $2k mom says get a nice one...which les paul do you fellas recomend?'

Dr.C (Dr.C), Tuesday, 20 June 2006 07:57 (eighteen years ago)

7) The guitar detective : "hold on, there's something about the headstock which doesn't look right. And the tuners don't jive - Fender only sourced that type between May 1982 and Jan 1983, and that doesn't match with your serial number. How much did you say you paid?"

and his cousin..

8) Ebay vigilante : "Look - there's a fucking decal been replaced on there! There's no way that's a made in the USA, no fuckin' way on God's earth! That guy should have his pancreas ripped out and shat on. I might just do it myself. But first...I'm gonna report him to ebay."

Dr.C (Dr.C), Tuesday, 20 June 2006 08:04 (eighteen years ago)

The classic of all musician's forums, related to the above is this:

Q: Hi, I'm a beginner, I'm looking for an electric bass, I scrimped for the last six months, and have $550. What do you guys recommend?

Answers one, two and maybe three have useful & relevant information

The next 8-10 answers suggest custom handbuilt bass guitars costing two thousand dollars and upwards.

From here on, it's just ppl posting pictures of their ridiculously expensive bass rigs.

Pashmina (Pashmina), Tuesday, 20 June 2006 08:06 (eighteen years ago)

And they all live in the SAME house! They have the SAME basement carpet or you can see part of the SAME wardobe in shot.

Dr.C (Dr.C), Tuesday, 20 June 2006 09:21 (eighteen years ago)

The Kult of Keeley was more hilarious a few years ago. The essence of this is you have some pedal that cost $80 and it has a "sound." But now you read some stuff from the Kult of Keeley at HC that said you could spend $80 - &120 for Keeley to rewire your pedal with its "sound" into a new pedal with a different sound. Now, why not just get a new different pedal, and then you'll have two instead of paying the same amount, to have one and no longer your old one?

For example, he mods Rats and I have an old Eighties Rat and it does what a Rat's supposed to do. And why would you modify it? If you don't like it, you don't like the Rat sound. Just sell it and get a not-Rat. Or keep it, until your zest for the Rat returns.

No, these guys were sending their Rats in to be turned into not-Rats. Now it sounds better than a Rat!!! "Oh-Kay!" as Alvin of the Chipmunks would say.

Urnst Kouch (Urnst Kouch), Tuesday, 20 June 2006 14:42 (eighteen years ago)

Danelectro Hash Brown Flanger
US $5(Check price @ Musician's Friend Musician.com )

Ease of Use: N/A
Its easy to use.
3 knobs.

Sound Quality: N/A
Its killing my tone on my tube amp.
Using a Fender Deville 2X12 60 watt tube.
The oscallating woosh is gross.

Reliability: 6
one knob fell off, it looks very much plastic and not able to stand up to the riggors of violence that one occurs during a show, puke, boots and the "OOPS spilt beer"

Id gig with out a back up because Id just throw it in the trash if it broke.

Overall Rating: 6
Its harsh, even at low volumes its sucking my tone.

Try this, have no volume on your guitar, turn it off then turn it on then just let it stand there you can hear a wooshing sound even at low setting if the unit.

I have a digital flanger also and I dont use that.

Well its not getting along with my Tube amp and its amplifing my tube humm.

Its going back in the closit or perhapse Ill use it with my 12 string guitar.

The sound was "Cool" but even at lowest settings the "WOOSHING" was enough to make me unplug it and go back to tone.

*Kind of fattened up my sound but I think ill get a Keeley Mod $200 pedal*

Urnst Kouch (Urnst Kouch), Tuesday, 20 June 2006 14:52 (eighteen years ago)

What thou is metal? Is it Jackson or 5150, let thou count the ways. No way am I playing that pussy Fender stuff, unless it has a JB or a 81. It just is not brewtal. I've got this german hand-built superstrat with a EMG81 and an alder body with a bolt on neck and it only cost $2800. It is brewtal, especially through my German built $3000 Cobra half stack. I'm not playing out. I don't have a band, because I just moved and all I have found is a bunch of pussies living around here. Metal out.

Earl Nash (earlnash), Tuesday, 20 June 2006 21:10 (eighteen years ago)

I personally think the Klon Centaur rules, but boy does it ever bring out the douchebag elitist in lots of people.
Reading the Klon page on Harmony Central is so hilarious.

Brooker Buckingham (Brooker B), Wednesday, 21 June 2006 16:43 (eighteen years ago)

The Wrath of Klon

XD (eman), Wednesday, 21 June 2006 17:01 (eighteen years ago)

Sound Quality: 10
I think when I played on it, it spoke to me. It said something in a beautiful, singinig, violin-like sustaining lead gain along the lines of, "I am Randall V-Max, the GOD of all amplifiers."

Reliability: N/A


Customer Support: N/A


Overall Rating: 10
I played on it and shit my pants. Tubes. Solid State. 6 band EQ. THE HEAVIEST DISTORION EVER ACHIEVED.

Submitted by RANDALLVMAX!!! at 06/20/2006 09:26

Urnst Kouch (Urnst Kouch), Wednesday, 21 June 2006 17:04 (eighteen years ago)

"I played on it and shit my pants. Once I'd got changed, I took it back to the shop and got a refund. Do not buy one, as it plays the brown note"

Pashmina (Pashmina), Wednesday, 21 June 2006 17:25 (eighteen years ago)

5) The tinkerer - spends all of his time worrying himself sick about minute variations in tone between the Acme chodbucker and the artist signature split-coil KK Downing-bucker. All of his 47 guitars are in pieces in his basement, but that's OK cos he can barely play anyway.

BWAHAHAHAHAHAHA!~!!!!!!1!!

Steve Shasta (Steve Shasta), Wednesday, 21 June 2006 17:35 (eighteen years ago)

Would you play this $4000 guitar in your junior executive cubicle without a backup?

"Did Jimmy Page play without a backup guitar? Of course not!

Hot Hot Heat (Hot Hot Heat), Wednesday, 21 June 2006 17:46 (eighteen years ago)

> why not just get a new different pedal

Because you really like the basic sound of the pedal you have, but are aware that it's not perfect.
Keeley's not selling moonshine. The improvements he promises are clearly audible, but the pedals' core tone isn't lost (and since you haven't actually tried his modified pedals, your opinions on their merits is - to be polite - moot).
I bought a modified Blues Driver from him, and the original's two weaknesses - a certain shrillness in the upper register when used with a Fender guitar/amp combo, and fizziness at high gain settings - are gone.

> Now it sounds better than a Rat!!! "Oh-Kay!"

Yes, it does sound better than the original. Why do you find this concept so problematic?

Palomino (Palomino), Wednesday, 21 June 2006 21:38 (eighteen years ago)

"improvements", "clearly audible", "pedals' core tone", "weaknesses", "shrillness", "fizziness", "sounds better".

These terms (and others like them) are what makes people devoted to Keeley amusing to me. And I like the stuff...I just get amazed by the blind acceptance of the people who preach his gospel.

John Justen, great tasting marksman. (johnjusten), Wednesday, 21 June 2006 21:57 (eighteen years ago)

Yes, it does sound better than the original. Why do you find this concept so problematic?

Because tone is subjective. So you're a member of the Kult of Keeley. And you've been offended. Welcome!

Urnst Kouch (Urnst Kouch), Wednesday, 21 June 2006 22:49 (eighteen years ago)

"Yes, it does sound better than the original. Why do you find this concept so problematic?"

In the case of a Rat, you don't buy a rat to have some holy grail sound, it's a damn Rat, dude. It's a little different in the case of a tube screamer, or to a lesser extent, a Big Muff, where there is classic examples of a (subjectively) idealized model AND somewhere down the line the parts or manufacturing process has changed.

But assuming every pedal should, or is inferior having not been, modded, is kinda silly. Especially when you get into say, Boss chorus mods.

reverend rock, Thursday, 22 June 2006 02:49 (eighteen years ago)

also, don't get me started on the FAKE pedals people write reviews for.

there was one called the 'Penguin Love Game' that guitar player actually thought was a real product and wrote it up in a feature about weird retro pedals. it had hello kitty-esque whimsical japanese stickers and the stomp switch was a computer key.

there's several reviews for Kuciel pedals that imply that they are a combination of water tanks (!?) and low fi digital circuitry to provide echo/delay.

reverend rock, Thursday, 22 June 2006 03:22 (eighteen years ago)

Haha, the kuciel reviews are classic!

the conclusion of this one reads like a bit from "The Third Man" or something:

Overall Rating: 10
A great match for some of the music I play. But first, here is the story on how I bought this wierd effect. I am from and live in Rome, Italy.
I wasa walking back from a nightclub at about three in the morning,
and this wierd American came up to me and asked my for a cigarette.
Luckily I speak English so I gave him one. This guy was in his early
20's, cleanshaven and dressed all in a black cotton suit. Even his shirt was black. Anyways, he said he was on vacation here and he bought this effects pedal in Romainia. He said he brought it as a gift
for a girlfriend who plays guitar, but she didn't want it.

I looked at the pedal as he took it out of his duffel bag and I offered him the equinilant of 14 American. He said O.K.. I asked
him who made this pedal. He pointed to the lettering in the top and said an old friend made it a long time ago. We parted and that was that.

I took it apart just recently and the inside looks like a big mess if wires,
plastic tubes and 2 small plastic containers of blueish green water. I assume that is where the reverb and swooshing sounds come in to play. I am pretty talented with electronics but I still don't understand
what the tubes do.

Graet value for what I paid.


these get mentioned on AH occasionally. At first I figured it was a variation on the archaic method of constructing an echo/reverb chamber, involving a tank filled with some kind of toxic pcb-laden oil, but no. Given some of the weird shit pedals made, eg last gasp arts lab's range, I'd believe that there's someone out there who will market anything imaginable, no matter how weird/illogical to jaded tone freakz.

Pashmina (Pashmina), Thursday, 22 June 2006 07:52 (eighteen years ago)

Company still exists it would appear:

http://kucielelectronics.tripod.com/kuciel/id8.html

Pashmina (Pashmina), Thursday, 22 June 2006 08:04 (eighteen years ago)

The above was for the Glisterin.
Here's one for the Kuciel Swimming-17. It comes with the one-liter pop bottle of water.

Price Paid: US $200
Ease of Use: 10
A very basic unit with just one very simple effect=REVERB. The is one on/off switch and one blue dial to control the amount of reverb. I got a very basic manual with the Swimming-17 which had great diagrams, but were written in Polish and Russian. No English sort of sucked, but the unit is easy to use anyways.

Sound Quality: 7
I don't really know what I can say about this or how I can describe this piece of equipment. Here it goes: There is only one sound which is made REVERB and it sounds really great. There are 3 Russsian 12AX7's on the top and a wierd glass cannister of greenish water on the bottom of this reverb unit. I use the Swimming-17 with my Fender Twin(older version) and I have the twitch on and the blue dial turned on full "Swam." The sound is super but limited to watery styles of music.

Reliability: N/A
I wouldn't bring this on a gig because it is way too heavy and I am worried that the water cannister will break and spill all over my fender amp. It is really only good for home use or if you have roadies to lug it around. I have no opinion for gig worthiness.

Customer Support: 5
Company support: I heard from a friend that they set-up shop in Edmonton, Alberta, Canada a few years back. That is really far away from where I live:Los Angeles, U.S.A.. I never tried to get it repaired, but if I did I would just have my friend's father repair it. I am giving it a 5 only because the Swimming-17 is super easy to repair. I took it apart once or twice to see how it ticked.

Overall Rating: 7
Great for surf music, music with reverb, and vocals. I'll describe the Swimming-17 to you: Three 12 AX7s one 1 liter-pop bottle sized clear glass container filled with greenish water. A Fender '63 Reverb style body but the tubs are on the top of the reverb unit. Point to point wiring. Simple construction and basic controls. I bought the Kuciel Swimming-17 because it was on sale and I wanted something far-out and unique to make music with. If any of you musicians want something wild and wierd then buy this unit.

Urnst Kouch (Urnst Kouch), Thursday, 22 June 2006 14:27 (eighteen years ago)

Here's another great Kuciel review for their fuzztone. Speechless.

Nola –邯‚΂͎g—p‚µ”ñ?í‚ɈՂ¢?B —e?ςƗ˜‰v‚Ì‚½‚ß‚Ì2 ‚‚̃_ƒCƒ„ƒ‹‚Í?ã‚É‚ ‚é?B ŒÅ‘Ì?d‹à‘®ƒ{ƒfƒB?B ‚±‚ê‚Í”ñ?í‚ɑ傫‚¢ƒyƒ_ƒ‹‚Å‚ ‚é?B ‚»‚ê‚̓Jƒiƒ_?»?B Ž„‚Í‚±‚ÌNola –邯‚΂ðŽ?‚Á‚Ä”ñ?í‚É?K‚¹, –¼—_‚ð—^‚¦‚ç‚ê‚é?B


http://kucielelectronics.tripod.com

Sound Quality: 9
‰¹‚ÍŒ»‘㉹Šy‚Ì‚½‚߂ɔñ?í‚É‹»–¡?[‚­, —L—p‚Å‚ ‚é?B “ú–{‚Ì?­?”‚Ì—L–¼‚ȉ¹Šy?¯‚̓Xƒ^ƒWƒI‚ÅNola –邯‚΂ðŽg—p‚µ,
?Z‚ñ‚Å‚¢‚é?B


ƒI?[ƒo?[ƒhƒ‰ƒCƒu‚©‚çJimi Hendrix ‚Ì‚¯‚΂©‚ç‚Ì‚·‚ׂĂւÌ?B


Reliability: 10
‘å‚«‚­, ’·‘±‚«‚ª‚·‚éƒvƒ?ƒ_ƒNƒg‚ð?ì‚é•û–@‚ðƒJƒiƒ_?l‚ª’m‚Á‚Ä
‚¢‚邱‚Æ‚ðŽ„‚Í?M‚¶‚é?B ‚±‚ê‚Í?¢ŠE‘å?íIII ‚ð‰z‚¦‚ÄŽ?‘±‚·‚é?B


Customer Support: N/A
ƒ`ƒƒ?[ƒ‹ƒYŠD?F‚Í?Å‚à—§”h‚ȃrƒWƒlƒXƒ}ƒ“‚Å‚ ‚é?B ”ނ͂ɘb‚µ”ñ?í‚ɈՂ­‚Ü‚½, “ú–{Œê‚ð˜b‚·•û–@‚ð’m‚Á‚Ä‚¢‚é?B ”Þ‚ÍŽ„‚ð”ñ?í‚É?•‚¯‚½?B ‚Ç‚ñ‚Èleo ‚̃tƒFƒ“ƒ_?[‚ª“d‹CƒMƒ^?[‚Ö‚ ‚é”Þ‚ÍŒø‰Ê‚̃yƒ_ƒ‹‚Ö
‚Å‚ ‚é!

Overall Rating: 9
Kuciel ‚̃yƒ_ƒ‹‚ªŒ’‘S‚È”ñ?í‚ɂ悢‚Æ‚Ä‚à‚æ‚­?ì‚ç‚ê‚é‚̂Ŏx•¥
‚í‚ê‚鉿Šii ‚Í”ñ?í‚ɂ悭, ?B ‰¹Šy‚»‚ê‚ç‚ÍŽ„‚ð?•‚¯‚écreat ‚ÍŽ„‚ª‰¹Šy‚ð?ì‚鑽‚­‚Ì‚¨‹à‚ð‚à
‚¤‚¯‚é‚Ì‚ð?•‚¯‚½?B ƒ`ƒƒ?[ƒ‹ƒY‚ ‚肪‚Æ‚¤?B


Please excuse. Review write in Japanese. I hope this O.K.

Urnst Kouch (Urnst Kouch), Thursday, 22 June 2006 14:32 (eighteen years ago)

"The sound is super but limited to watery styles of music."

Ha ha ha ha ha

There aren't any reviews of these units up at harsh noise even. I wonder if it is a spoof.

Pashmina (Pashmina), Thursday, 22 June 2006 15:15 (eighteen years ago)

Because you really like the basic sound of the pedal you have, but are aware that it's not perfect.

Keeley's not selling moonshine. The improvements he promises are clearly audible... I bought a modified Blues Driver from him, and the original's two weaknesses - a certain shrillness in the upper register when used with a Fender guitar/amp combo, and fizziness at high gain settings - are gone.

I don't think Keeley's selling moonshine, I think he (and a lot of other pro modders) is selling a few easy cap value changes that do change a pedal's output. Now, whether that change is for the better or not is in the ear of the behearer, n'est-ce pas?

What's aggravating is the notion that the stock pedal was "imperfect" and has now been "improved" by having its "weaknesses" removed. The pedal was fine, and now it's been changed, and it's still fine. And also has e.g. a cool blue LED.

rogermexico (rogermexico), Thursday, 22 June 2006 17:55 (eighteen years ago)

> I just get amazed by the blind acceptance of the people who preach his gospel.

Okay, I'm biting my tongue real hard now. Like I said, I A-B'd the modified BD-2 with the original, I could clearly hear the change in tone that Keeley's spiel promised, and I liked it. It's not impossible that I'm wrong, but still, where do you get off on condescendingly assuring everybody else that I'm only imagining it all?

> The pedal was fine, and now it's been changed, and it's still fine

Well, I think that it was quite good, but that it's doubleplusgood now because it's smoother and more versatile. To suggest that "It's not the same pedal any more! DON'T YOU SEE?" is just semantics, as far as I'm concerned.

I agree that upgrading a Rat is a dopey idea. They're supposed to sound nasty.


whether that change is for the better or not is in the ear of the behearer

I agree, but to claim that a change is for the better is apparently not allowed around here.

Palomino (Palomino), Thursday, 22 June 2006 20:02 (eighteen years ago)

but to claim that a change is for the better is apparently not allowed around here

Sure it is. But your lack of a sense of humor is making more sport for us than for you.

Urnst Kouch (Urnst Kouch), Thursday, 22 June 2006 20:27 (eighteen years ago)

I agree, but to claim that a change is for the better is apparently not allowed around here.

I think folks are just a bit skeptical, given that what most of the modders do is pretty simple and comes down to taste. When you say you could hear the change and you liked it, you're expressing a personal preference and no one's going to disagree. When you make a judgement beyond which one's better for your ear, fingers, rig, style etc. is where you dip your toe into the piranha-infested waters.

rogermexico (rogermexico), Thursday, 22 June 2006 21:17 (eighteen years ago)

Palomino, I'm not saying you imagined the change in tone. I'm saying that it isn't "better", just different.

John Justen, great tasting marksman. (johnjusten), Thursday, 22 June 2006 22:18 (eighteen years ago)

Alright guys, point taken.


> your lack of a sense of humor is making more sport for us

"The beatings will continue until morale improves."

Palomino (Palomino), Thursday, 22 June 2006 23:13 (eighteen years ago)

i really, really like my modded blues driver, but i wouldn't necessarily rush into any other mods.

electric sound of jim (and why not) (electricsound), Friday, 23 June 2006 00:34 (eighteen years ago)

And I really, really like my un-modded Blues Driver!

Dr.C (Dr.C), Friday, 23 June 2006 06:02 (eighteen years ago)

And I don't like either Blues Driver (and I have totally played both)

Let's start a traveling debate!

martin m. (mushrush), Friday, 23 June 2006 06:24 (eighteen years ago)

fortunately the only one i have to play is my own so that's the only one i care about

electric sound of jim (and why not) (electricsound), Friday, 23 June 2006 07:21 (eighteen years ago)

A bit of a shame that this thread withered into a geek pedal mod back-and-forth. Reminds me of the audiophiles who get so worked up claiming they can hear differences in various kinds of wire.

Hot Hot Heat (Hot Hot Heat), Friday, 23 June 2006 23:11 (eighteen years ago)

INTERCONNECTS.

fuckin newb.

green discs on my cds, Saturday, 24 June 2006 01:32 (eighteen years ago)

A bit of a shame that this thread withered into a geek pedal mod back-and-forth. Reminds me of the audiophiles who get so worked up claiming they can hear differences in various kinds of wire.

http://www.vhaudio.com/wire.html#vhspeaker
http://www.vhaudio.com/powercables.html

Werner Herzog Netflix Quine (ex machina), Saturday, 24 June 2006 01:34 (eighteen years ago)

how do i turned down the suck?

XD (eman), Saturday, 24 June 2006 01:40 (eighteen years ago)

Some Fulton-Webb amplifier.

This is person is not only vain and deluded, but also probably saddled with a raging pill habit.

US $1,699.00

For Hendrix and Trower stuff, I dial the Lift up to 12 o'clock, volume to 12 o'clock and tone at 3:15-3:30 o'clock with my guitar's volume at 7 or 9 depending on the song and the Textosterone kicked in depending on song or whenever a solo comes up. I use this amp at home because I am woodshedding until I get good enough to jam with my brother. Years ago, these customers of mine had me over for dinner one night and they took me to the listening portion of their pent/warehouse to hear these $3,000(?!) Klipsch La Scala speakers driven by a 5 Watt Creek Amp! What I'm saying is this 17 Watt amp is loud. I bought a sound level meter and realized that I play at 115dB but I've got these earplugs that take it down by 33dB. Ted Nugent's guy is finding out what earplugs Ted uses for me. Needless to say the amp has plenty of power, and when you hook it up to the 4X12 Cabinet built for me by Fulton-Webb equipped with Tone Tubbys in "the bomb" formation, I've got the poorman's version of the Creek/La Scala going on in my house. All the neighbors remark how my playing has improved their lives with each passing day. The people across the street sometimes hang out in the drive way to hear my progress...heh,heh. This amp arrived Fedex Ground one year ago. I use an Evidence 1 foot Siren speaker cable to connect the head to the hand wired cab. It is a 10 for me.

I have a tuner>octave>fuzz>wah>overdrive univibe>delay from vendors like Peterson, Dave Fox, Diaz, Teese, Bill Webb, Bob Sweet and Mike at Analog Man on the pedalboard. I've got another cable from Two Rock that will run the signal from the pedalboard to the amp. Put it all together and it is a smokin' little rig from Texas is what it is. I don't think it is noisy, and niether do my neighbors for I have brought music into their boring & tedious lives!

I am an eccentric beginner that has been playing every day for the last 18 months or 1,000 hours based on two hours avg. per day. My brother's been playing for nine years and he tells me I already know more than I even realize. Spanish Atavism at its best-the guitar is arguably aSpanish invention

Urnst Kouch (Urnst Kouch), Wednesday, 28 June 2006 13:40 (eighteen years ago)

that one truly has it all: references to audiophilia, celebrity name dropping, snobbery obsession down to the brand of cables he uses (two-rock makes dumble clones, which is perhaps the essential harmony central douchebag item), and the cherry on top: 'i basically just play hendrix and trower in my house.'

reverend rock, Wednesday, 28 June 2006 14:40 (eighteen years ago)

Ted Nugent's guy is finding out what earplugs Ted uses for me.

Best vain douchebaggery ever.

rogermexico (rogermexico), Wednesday, 28 June 2006 17:10 (eighteen years ago)

ted nugent fuckin wears earplugs at ALL????!

reverend rock, Thursday, 29 June 2006 01:39 (eighteen years ago)

"I am woodshedding until I get good enough to jam with my brother"

for fucks sake

XD (eman), Thursday, 29 June 2006 02:04 (eighteen years ago)

Actually, one of Ted's ears doesn't work at all. The one that was pointed toward the amps died sometime in the 70's. It was a popular story in the music mags.

Urnst Kouch (Urnst Kouch), Thursday, 29 June 2006 06:07 (eighteen years ago)

"Ted Nugent's guy"

I didn't know Ted was gay.

Raw Patrick (Raw Patrick), Thursday, 29 June 2006 07:07 (eighteen years ago)

I always say of my excessive jerking off that "I am woodshedding until I get good enough to jam with a woman."

Raw Patrick (Raw Patrick), Thursday, 29 June 2006 07:09 (eighteen years ago)

haha that realy is the best review ever. the last paragraph is particularly insane: "I am an eccentric beginner that has been playing every day for the last 18 months or 1,000 hours based on two hours avg. per day. My brother's been playing for nine years and he tells me I already know more than I even realize. Spanish Atavism at its best-the guitar is arguably aSpanish invention"

what is 'spanish atavism'?

fjskl, Thursday, 29 June 2006 07:16 (eighteen years ago)

Ha ha ha ha that review is an absolute fucking CLASSIC! Surely no-one can top that one.

Pashmina (Pashmina), Thursday, 29 June 2006 07:31 (eighteen years ago)

what is 'spanish atavism'

Guitar in TEH BLOOD.

rogermexico (rogermexico), Thursday, 29 June 2006 13:56 (eighteen years ago)

what would you know, you're just a statistician

hjfgk, Thursday, 29 June 2006 18:59 (eighteen years ago)

There's nothing wrong with statistics.

Steve Shasta (Steve Shasta), Thursday, 29 June 2006 20:39 (eighteen years ago)

http://acapella.harmony-central.com/forums/showthread.php?s=&threadid=1272942

Not reviews, but HC church-rock madness. Just insane.

Dr. C (Dr. C), Saturday, 1 July 2006 12:19 (eighteen years ago)

============

Just out of curiousity, is it a Baptist church? I've never gone to a church where something like that would be permissible, and Baptist is one of the churches I've never gone to.

(Ignore the pentagram for my avatar, I've defended Christianity in the SSS Political forum before.)


__________________
Gear:
Gibson SG Standard
Fender MIM Strat w/ DiMarzio PAF Pro
Peavey ValveKing 2x12 Combo
Peavey XXL 2x12 Combo
Dunlop Crybaby Wah
Ibanez TS9 Tube Screamer
Boss MT-2 Metal Zone

Emperor - I Am the Black Wizards
Bathory - Mother Earth Father Thunder
Mayhem - Freezing Moon
Burzum - Dunkelheit
Satyricon - Fuel for Hatred
Darkthrone - Too Old Too Cold

==========

Urnst Kouch (Urnst Kouch), Saturday, 1 July 2006 18:47 (eighteen years ago)

The whole "what amp for modern praise and worship tones" scene is a bit perplexing to me. Is nothing sacred?

I keep coming back to Hank Hill: "Can't you see that you're not making Christianity better? You're just making rock and roll worse."

rogermexico (rogermexico), Saturday, 1 July 2006 18:51 (eighteen years ago)

Another sign of mental incapacity among the church rockers is the constant employment of smiley and frowny-face animated icons.
=====================================

My denomination is Christian and Missionary Alliance (C&MA)

Some Pastors are against the use of electric guitars, but I think they are changing little by little due to a changing generation and the style of praise music that's been coming out.

Adult services electrics would never be used, bass guitar isn't even being used.

English Ministry and Youth Group services have electric guitar (this is recent. I switch to acoustic when we have no drums for english ministry.)

There has been a recent trend in Christian music where there are alot of electric parts, and we have people who want to praise God and know how to play the electric guitar.
=============

Urnst Kouch (Urnst Kouch), Saturday, 1 July 2006 20:00 (eighteen years ago)

"Many people say that the Klon is a wimpy overdrive with no gain whatsoever. Well, if you understand that the Klon's circuit attaches itself to the internal circuit of the amp, you'll realize that IF there is natural Tube distortion hiding in the "Clean Channel" of the Amp, the Klon will find it and absolutely exploit it! Same thing with the lead channel. If you have a mild crunch on the lead channel, the Klon will find the rest of the gain and really maximize it."
I don't know whether to laugh or cry....

The GZeus (The GZeus), Wednesday, 12 July 2006 20:49 (eighteen years ago)

The Klon "attaches itself to the internal circuit," perhaps like a tick? It will find and exploit the raging blood of your amplifier.

Urnst Kouch (Urnst Kouch), Wednesday, 12 July 2006 21:29 (eighteen years ago)

I'm thinking facehugger.

rogermexico (rogermexico), Wednesday, 12 July 2006 21:37 (eighteen years ago)

THe Klon Lamprey is sure to follow.

John Justen, Bataan death march of dimes. (johnjusten), Wednesday, 12 July 2006 21:41 (eighteen years ago)

the Klon's circuit attaches itself to the internal circuit of the amp

Fixed-lens video and hushed/respectful narration plz!

http://www.museum.tv/archives/etv/W/htmlW/wildkingdom/wildkingdomIMAGE/wildkingdom.jpg

rogermexico (rogermexico), Wednesday, 12 July 2006 22:06 (eighteen years ago)

I really wish people would attempt to UNDERSTAND how amplification circuitry works.

The GZeus (The GZeus), Wednesday, 12 July 2006 22:37 (eighteen years ago)

Amp make noise bigger?

rogermexico (rogermexico), Wednesday, 12 July 2006 22:40 (eighteen years ago)

Exactly.
But a pedal can't like...REACH INTO your tubes...

The GZeus (The GZeus), Thursday, 13 July 2006 02:51 (eighteen years ago)

Not even for $300?

rogermexico (rogermexico), Thursday, 13 July 2006 04:33 (eighteen years ago)

Hell, I'll tell you whatever you want to hear for 1k.
I'll add knobs and more diodes and even MORE epoxy!

The GZeus (The GZeus), Thursday, 13 July 2006 04:37 (eighteen years ago)

Here's one of your best examples of the "I buy a suck cock slave labor guitar and spend so much money and work modifying it I might as well ask to work in Fender's custom shop." Many wonderful bon mots.

http://reviews.harmony-central.com/reviews/Guitar/product/Agile/ST-1000/10/1

"If not for the tuning instability, and lack of tone, this guitar would be very nice"

"I am retarded in that I always buy the cheap brands."

Urnst Kouch (Urnst Kouch), Thursday, 13 July 2006 15:00 (eighteen years ago)

LOL @ that review, especially "The Agile ST-1000 would be a very good project guitar", what crap, he spends the entire review listing things that are wrong w/it, totally fundamental things. Going on the review, the idiot would have been better just buying a strat body from a parts shop!

Pashmina (Pashmina), Thursday, 13 July 2006 15:28 (eighteen years ago)

Yeah, I've not heard great things about their strat models.
makes me doubt Wilkinson OEM hardware...

Their AL and Tele models get really good reviews.
They have their own Lite Ash model, more or less.

The GZeus (The GZeus), Thursday, 13 July 2006 15:50 (eighteen years ago)

Totally confused member of Kult of Keeley nation.


Keeley BD-2 Fat Mod

It sounds good!
However my modded DOD YJM308 blows it out of the water.
The Phat switch is subutle & I do like it.
This is not a good pedal to run in front of an amp.
It is Killer when used as a Stombox for solo's.
Keeley does a good job on pedals. I wish it had less gain
& didn't squeal as much as it does.

Urnst Kouch (Urnst Kouch), Sunday, 23 July 2006 16:00 (eighteen years ago)


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