Blame Jon

Reply to: anon-101476632@craigslist.org
Date: 2005-10-02, 9:54PM EDT

Why do all the hot girls get off the L train at Bedford and Lorimer? What's wrong with Montrose Ave, it's not that bad, come on ladies, just stay on the train for a few stops more.

this is in or around Williamsburg

Don't think I won't catch you. You may have won the last round, but I will see this through to the end---sweet revenge will be mine. You may have found a way around the strips of fly paper, the shattered glass laid out around the vents, my now departed cat, the mousetraps, and the sadly miscalculated elf-sized-poison-laced cookies that eventually cost me my cat. However, you will not escape what I have coming.

Remember who started this. The tiny notes with the vulgar threatening language and the disappearance of my glasses didn't do much to win me over. In the end though it has been the continued theft of the spices from the rack set atop my kitchen counter that has closed my heart to your breed. You are a greedy and wasteful race. No one needs that much Thyme---certainly no man---and without doubt not even your entire colony could possibly burn through it at the rate it has vanished from its rightful place among my other spices.

I wake to see you merrily dancing at the foot of my bed, sliding from the sheets draped over my feet. I kick, but it is all a game to you. And for all the sleep you have cost me these past few dreadful months, I swear I will one day feast on your still beating black hearts mixed into a stew with the last bottle of Thyme I will ever find need to buy.

This is not a warning.

Reply to: anon-104555716@craigslist.org
Date: 2005-10-16, 7:08PM EDT

You hurt me. Damn! Thought I fooled you. I really tried to not feel anything for you but you got to me. I shouldn't have had any expecations but maybe I was secretly hoping for more. I was hiding and not being real. If you knew the real me you might have come back. Shame on me, I brought this on. Think I'd know your patterns by now. Still kinda expected you to be cooler about it. Oh well, good luck sweetie. I'll move on now...

this is in or around Brooklyn

I passed you on the sidewalk this afternoon. You had the remnants of a penis drawn on your forehead with a Sharpie. You were talking on the phone, very distraught, saying, "I hate my life."
I turned around and wanted to call out to you- to comfort you and give you a hug.
I know I don't know you, but I just wanted to tell you that it gets better. I too have been down in the dumps and 'hated my life.' But, in the end, things turn around. You may not believe that now, but they will. Don't worry.

* this is in or around Around NYU
* no -- it's NOT ok to contact this poster with services or other commercial interests

http://www.mysmallcock.com/small-penis-cartoon.jpg

Can I have your number, my friend needs some too.

Metrosexual missing new penpal Rebecca - m4w
Reply to: anon-106946346@craigslist.org
Date: 2005-10-27, 12:45AM EDT


I am having problems with my emails. I keep writing to you but my server keeps responding that the email is undeliverable. Sorry. I'm still around and will keep trying to write you. I am getting your messages so respond that you read this.

    * this is in or around Barney's
    * no -- it's NOT ok to contact this poster with services or other commercial interests