This is the thread where you can moan about your housemates

Last year I shared a flat with a bloke, and we only did the minimal amount of cleaning. I wasn't that bothered, cos I was sharing with a bloke after all. So this year I though it'd be a refreshing change to share with some girls and we'd be clean.

There are 4 girls in our flat, and it just annoys me that two of my flatmates never clean any of the communal areas (kitchen, hallway, bathroom etc). It always ends up being me or the other flatmate who give in and start hoovering. And it isn't usually us who makes the most mess either.

And the other thing I'm annoyed about is how the front door to our flat is always unlocked. I live in a block of student flats, and one of my flatmate's boyfriend lives across the corridoor from us, so they always leave the door unlocked to pop in and out of each other's flats. She didn't ask us in the beginning if this was ok. Recently, another flat in our building was burgled, and so I lock up the flat whenever I go out, always to find that the door has been unlocked again by the time I get home.

Anyway, moaning over. I only have to live here for another 2 months.

Currently I live with three girls, and they're all okay. I've had worse flatmates in the past.

what to do when your roommate doesn't realize you're home and thusly is having loud sex in the living room

Kids don't like their own balls.

Kelsey perhaps you could encourage your roomie to put the TV in her room. If she says no, she wants to watch in the living room, then just tel her she can't watch as much. Period. That's the choice.

i am HORRIBLE with confrontation. plus, said roommate is a good friend i've known since college. things have been strained because i think we have a hard time confronting one another b/c we're friends, we are both "keepers of the peace," etc. i don't know. i make way too many excuses. i'm just miserable.

jellybean too!!

kelsey i'm just saying, your friend doesn't share your feelings about the subject and that's fine, she shouldn't have to. but she ought to know that it's driving you up the wall. if she's your friend hopefully that will make it even easier to figure something out. honestly, TV-in-room is probably the best solution, it might open her up to realizing the living room can be a not-TV place, rather than having some "restriction" because of you..

clearly we need to have a "talk" this weekend.

Passive agressive housemates..

totally true! dishes are definitely the most visible thing in a shared house. basically, i wash my pans and stuff straight after ive used them (takes like 1 minute while your food is still hot), and whatever else is in there (this is easy because there is never much), and then wash my plate right after ive eaten.

i think it helps to live in a house where there arent many dishes and pans too. like, when you see houses where the dishes are piled sky high, you think, why do they have so many dishes? if they had half the amount of stuff, then that pile would be half as tall. workload cut in half for no effort!

i'm actually pretty lucky at the moment, the 2 girls i live with, its been totally fine, no weirdness, no atmosphere, no arguments, its pretty great actually!

Isn't it getting you kicked out?

i really like my current roomate. except when she hooks up with someone and is FUCKING LOUD. exagerated moaning (with thin walls and a roomate) peeves me even more than lezzing up for frat guys. i mean do people masturbate loud?

My current housemate is super cool, though. I really can't complain.

2) you have a very loud phone voice. from my room, with the door closed, i can hear every word you're saying. and you talk on the phone A LOT. which wouldn't bother me if you'd just keep it down.

3) living room = communal area. that means i get to be in there too sometimes. there ARE other places you can go.

Leaving notes for you housemates telling them to tidy up: C/D?

Dud.

Also, my housemate's new boyfriend is a jerk but I don't have the heart to tell her that even through it's so obvious.

I knew it was dud really but I had little option this morning. No-one was around to yell at.

I'm only there at weekends and each one since we've moved in I've spent at least 2/3 hours cleaning and wahing up and generally making it bareable. They don't notice and don't care and within hours it descends into chaos. I don't want to be their mum and have a go at them all the time but they don't give a shit. I'd also prefer not to be their sodding housekeeper.

So this mornign, before leaving for work, I left a note asking them to maintain a reasonable level of tidiness, acknowledging the fact that note-writers are twats.

Bah, they won't even notice it.

Ive' got two housemates. H is great, but K just hates me. I mean REALLY hates me. God knows why, since I have done NOTHING to annoy her AT ALL. Granted I used to smoke in the house, but she asked me not to, and I stopped about a month ago. There was the usual gripe about cleaning, but after I organised a rota, there been no reason for her to argue. She makes a point of staying in her room the whole time and not coming out, and when we meet she just glares at me like I've shagged her mum. I always try and say hi to her nicely, and I get a very terse, pissed-off hi back. I've tried asking her what the problem is, and her reply (veboten) was "I just want to be left alone." And now she hasn't paid the rent on time, and I'm a bit scared to ask her what she's playing at.

She might be moving out soon and another friend moving in (we're just waiting for the other friend to say yes or no) so it might all sort itself out, but it just makes living at home really uncomfortable.

My flatmate came home the Sunday before last and announced that she is an ex-heroin addict. She has been in a methodone program for two years and is currently coming off it. She has been my flatmate for 4 months.

Well, at least she's getting better. That's a good thing isn't it? Is she being nice and flatmatey?

She's not there all that often, as she spends a lot of time at her bonghead boyfriend's house. She is my new landlord. She moved in for tax reasons and will move out again in 2 & a half months (fingers crossed). So it's not so bad really. I was just somewhat flabbergasted that she failed to mention the drug detail before she moved in.

Nothing sucks like a housemate who sells hundreds of yr records to buy crack.

Precisely. So my initial concern was not unwarranted?

All the dope addicts I've known have been too slow to pull off anything worse than begging for $20 to score for a night, so I dunno. I think that you have to give some credit for at least trying to get straight, especially when it's not offa ups.

On the other hand, my ex-best friend is in prison right now serving a 7 year sentence for holding up a store for dope money.

Two of her ex-boyfriends are in prison. I commend her for attempting to move away from that life, but at the same time I feel a distinct sense of unease. I have voiced support & encouragement but I will be relieved when she moves out.

slight bitter roffles at a former junkie being a homeowner in melbs

Reason #2933 being married kinda rules: No more crazy housemates.

Former junkie homeowner in Sydney. Even worse.

!

I know! Well I'm off home now to watch Planet Earth. Hopefully the crackwhore will be out.

An old friend of mine was living with this housemate once, who was a nice normal straight (drugwise) guy, until one day he went crazy ape bonkers on a smack binge and ODed in their house. He didnt die, but she was so freaked out by the whole thing she almost lost the plot.

i love my roommates. no drama. ever. it is amazing.

I hate one of my roommates. She never ever leaves the house, never goes out and gets real angry at me everytime I even dare have friends over. She hasnt paid the rent for this month. She doesnt give a fuck about the trash and will just keep putting things in the trash even though it is clearly overflowing. She never cleans her dishes and pans and shouts at me if i happen to do so. Also, and that is a minor gripe, she always leaves all the lights on. I once came home after a party to find the lights switched on in the living room, kitchen, bathroom. It's almost like she decided to put on all the lights in the flat and go to bed. And every time i try and talk to her about all those things, when i ask her to pay me the rent, she acts all righteous. I'm so glad i'm moving out in june.

Oh whatever, junkies are uncomfortable roommates but if she's been on methadone for two years and she's detoxing now, she's hardly a junkie anymore, is she? Did you mistrust her before she told you?

Not mistrust, but something felt slightly off. She came across as cagey and secretive, but I thought that was fair enough because I didn't know her before she moved in. Yesterday I was nice and flatmatey by offering her a lift back to pick up her car from where she had left it on Saturday night. On the way she mentioned that she had left it out the front of a friend's house where the said friend was smoking ice. Is it just me or does that not really sound like the ideal type of environment for someone fresh out of rehab to be visiting?

Each of my roommates was a junkie at some point. It's working out okay though. If anyone gets a notion that someone is using drugs again we'd definitely get to the bottom of it quick-like.

How did you get rid of them? Getting to the bottom of it quick-like sounds a little...sinister.

Housemate got home at 1am last night, at which point he sat in the living room and decided to phone me "to say hi" (his words). I was asleep in the next room. Note that he was not drunk. He is just a cretin. Presumably this was his way of finding out whether I was at home, because he is too moronic to just sit alone with his thoughts for five minutes. I hung up on him immediately then got up to go to the bathroom. He called out from the living room to say hi. I ignored him. He then went to bed, leaving the TV on at his usual volume (very loud), which woke me up two hours later.

Last Friday my copy of the Criterion Edition of The Ice Storm came in the mail. I opened it and put it on my shelf. That afternoon he took it home to his parents for the weekend. Oh that's right, you can call me at 1am to say hi, but you can't call me at 4pm to ask if you can take my shit.

is this guy an academic

French guy I live with has about a kilo of potently smelly cheese sent to him while he is away for three weeks. Needs to be kept in a plastic bag in the (otherwise empty) hotpress and even then the apartment needs to be fully aired out daily. Another two and a half weeks of this, I just hope it doesn't turn out to be a human head.

eat it. deny all knowledge when he returns. easy.

(nb: if it is a head, you might want to reconsider the "eating it" part.)

For other breakfast things, George suggested eggs and bacon, which were easy to cook, cold meat, tea, bread and butter, and jam. For lunch, he said, we could have biscuits, cold meat, bread and butter, and jam--but no cheese. Cheese, like oil, makes too much of itself. It wants the whole boat to itself. It goes through the hamper, and gives a cheesy flavour to everything else there. You can't tell whether you are eating apple-pie or German sausage, or strawberries and cream. It all seems cheese. There is too much odour about cheese.

I remember a friend of mine, buying a couple of cheeses at Liverpool. Splendid cheeses they were, ripe and mellow, and with a two hundred horse-power scent about them that might have been warranted to carry three miles, and knock a man over at two hundred yards. I was in Liverpool at the time, and my friend said that if I didn't mind he would get me to take them back with me to London, as he should not be coming up for a day or two himself, and he did not think the cheeses ought to be kept much longer.

"Oh, with pleasure, dear boy," I replied, "with pleasure."

I called for the cheeses, and took them away in a cab. It was a ramshackle affair, dragged along by a knock-kneed, broken-winded somnambulist, which his owner, in a moment of enthusiasm, during conversation, referred to as a horse. I put the cheeses on the top, and we started off at a shamble that would have done credit to the swiftest steam-roller ever built, and all went merry as a funeral bell, until we turned the corner. There, the wind carried a whiff from the cheeses full on to our steed. It woke him up, and, with a snort of terror, he dashed off at three miles an hour. The wind still blew in his direction, and before we reached the end of the street he was laying himself out at the rate of nearly four miles an hour, leaving the cripples and stout old ladies simply nowhere.

It took two porters as well as the driver to hold him in at the station; and I do not think they would have done it, even then, had not one of the men had the presence of mind to put a handkerchief over his nose, and to light a bit of brown paper.

I took my ticket, and marched proudly up the platform, with my cheeses, the people falling back respectfully on either side. The train was crowded, and I had to get into a carriage where there were already seven other people. One crusty old gentleman objected, but I got in, notwithstanding; and, putting my cheeses upon the rack, squeezed down with a pleasant smile, and said it was a warm day.

A few moments passed, and then the old gentleman began to fidget.

"Very close in here," he said.

"Quite oppressive," said the man next him.

And then they both began sniffing, and, at the third sniff, they caught it right on the chest, and rose up without another word and went out. And then a stout lady got up, and said it was disgraceful that a respectable married woman should be harried about in this way, and gathered up a bag and eight parcels and went. The remaining four passengers sat on for a while, until a solemn-looking man in the corner, who, from his dress and general appearance, seemed to belong to the undertaker class, said it put him in mind of dead baby; and the other three passengers tried to get out of the door at the same time, and hurt themselves.

I smiled at the black gentleman, and said I thought we were going to have the carriage to ourselves; and he laughed pleasantly, and said that some people made such a fuss over a little thing. But even he grew strangely depressed after we had started, and so, when we reached Crewe, I asked him to come and have a drink. He accepted, and we forced our way into the buffet, where we yelled, and stamped, and waved our umbrellas for a quarter of an hour; and then a young lady came, and asked us if we wanted anything.

"What's yours?" I said, turning to my friend.

"I'll have half-a-crown's worth of brandy, neat, if you please, miss," he responded.

And he went off quietly after he had drunk it and got into another carriage, which I thought mean.

From Crewe I had the compartment to myself, though the train was crowded. As we drew up at the different stations, the people, seeing my empty carriage, would rush for it. "Here y' are, Maria; come along, plenty of room." "All right, Tom; we'll get in here," they would shout. And they would run along, carrying heavy bags, and fight round the door to get in first. And one would open the door and mount the steps, and stagger back into the arms of the man behind him; and they would all come and have a sniff, and then droop off and squeeze into other carriages, or pay the difference and go first.

From Euston, I took the cheeses down to my friend's house. When his wife came into the room she smelt round for an instant. Then she said:

"What is it? Tell me the worst."

I said:

"It's cheeses. Tom bought them in Liverpool, and asked me to bring them up with me."

And I added that I hoped she understood that it had nothing to do with me; and she said that she was sure of that, but that she would speak to Tom about it when he came back.

My friend was detained in Liverpool longer than he expected; and, three days later, as he hadn't returned home, his wife called on me. She said:

"What did Tom say about those cheeses?"

I replied that he had directed they were to be kept in a moist place, and that nobody was to touch them.

She said:

"Nobody's likely to touch them. Had he smelt them?"

I thought he had, and added that he seemed greatly attached to them.

"You think he would be upset," she queried, "if I gave a man a sovereign to take them away and bury them?"

I answered that I thought he would never smile again.

An idea struck her. She said:

"Do you mind keeping them for him? Let me send them round to you."

"Madam," I replied, "for myself I like the smell of cheese, and the journey the other day with them from Liverpool I shall ever look back upon as a happy ending to a pleasant holiday. But, in this world, we must consider others. The lady under whose roof I have the honour of residing is a widow, and, for all I know, possibly an orphan too. She has a strong, I may say an eloquent, objection to being what she terms `put upon.' The presence of your husband's cheeses in her house she would, I instinctively feel, regard as a `put upon'; and it shall never be said that I put upon the widow and the orphan."

"Very well, then," said my friend's wife, rising, "all I have to say is, that I shall take the children and go to an hotel until those cheeses are eaten. I decline to live any longer in the same house with them."

She kept her word, leaving the place in charge of the charwoman, who, when asked if she could stand the smell, replied, "What smell?" and who, when taken close to the cheeses and told to sniff hard, said she could detect a faint odour of melons. It was argued from this that little injury could result to the woman from the atmosphere, and she was left.

The hotel bill came to fifteen guineas; and my friend, after reckoning everything up, found that the cheeses had cost him eight-and-sixpence a pound. He said he dearly loved a bit of cheese, but it was beyond his means; so he determined to get rid of them. He threw them into the canal; but had to fish them out again, as the bargemen complained. They said it made them feel quite faint. And, after that, he took them one dark night and left them in the parish mortuary. But the coroner discovered them, and made a fearful fuss.

He said it was a plot to deprive him of his living by waking up the corpses.

My friend got rid of them, at last, by taking them down to a sea-side town, and burying them on the beach. It gained the place quite a reputation. Visitors said they had never noticed before how strong the air was, and weak-chested and consumptive people used to throng there for years afterwards.

Fond as I am of cheese, therefore, I hold that George was right in declining to take any.

that's from The Code Of The Woosters innit?

NO NO Three Men In A Boat

^^^funniest book ever

is this guy an academic

No, but that would explain a lot. But then again, so does his actual job, which is management consultancy following a big fat 2:1.

you sound kinda grouchy. i understand the grievance but as housemate misdemeanours go, these would surely lie toward the mild end of the scale.

Yes and yes.

Note thread title though. Those things deserve a moan, not a change of living arrangements.

Indeed they do. I'm not leaping to the guy's defence, just very aware that I have perpetrated crimes far more heinous against former housemates.

Mind you I have also been pissed off by a lot less so...

This is why cell phones sometimes complicate things.

I dunno, it's getting kinda boring hearing the South African who lives below me slap his gf around yet again.

I dunno, it's getting kinda boring hearing the South African who lives below me slap his gf around yet again.

Jesus!

cant wait to get my own place

ive never lived alone

I'm not really built for living with people, I'm messy passive aggressive and I play music really loudly. I also drink too much and come home late and eat my cupboards out leaving a mess all over the kitchen and then wake up at noon. I spend hours cooking sometimes and it takes up the whole kitchen. Also, I don't like television and so rarely hang out in the sittingroom because this is always television centred whereas I just wanna drink beer and dance or read in my room most of the time.

I wish my housemates were more willing to adopt systems and schedules and such. Dishes, shopping, cooking, cleaning...when you expect five people to just be adults and voluntarily do equal amounts of each, well, that's just unrealistic. And it results in me becoming incredibly annoyed when I feel other people aren't doing their share and then they say something like "who left dishes in the sink?" or "have you thought about dinner yet?"

^I called the police, they came round. The guy got his marching orders, lest he get arrested. If he shows his face again he will be. He's smashed the front door in, but now normality has been restored.
To be continued,I suppose.

wow. i hope things wind up ok for the gf.

Do I email this y/n?

"If you're going to take my washing powder then you may want to ask an adult to show you how to use it. As demonstrated by the fact that your laundry smells of BO and the wrong compartment in the washing machine draw is full of unused washing powder, it's not the one you apparently think it is."

lol passive aggressive a bit? telling them off directly is slightly scarier but a lot more satisfying.

Don't send. You've spelled 'drawer' wrong and your housemate will derive pleasure from this.

housemate has gone on holiday and i'm going away for a month tomorrow, so i'm not going to have a chance to tell him in person. aaaaand, i'm about to move out so i have no problem with passive aggression. spelling fixed (thanks suzy!) and sent. boom.

p.s. this is a 28 year old who phoned me last october to say all the clocks in the house were an hour fast and what should he do about it?

LOL a few months ago there was a problem in my block with a door to door pawn guy who'd come all the way up from Southampton to ignore our massive NO HAWKERS signs, leafleted the entire block with a poor photocopy which was all 'Sell! Sell! Best Prices, CASH, Check Your Draws For Old Gold'.

Any time you want to cuss someone out in writing, it's always a good idea to check spelling and grammar. My dad's wife used to write these poison notes to cover situations that were my father's responsibility. She made the mistake of telling me once that her aunt used to correct her correspondence so whenever I got one of these illiterate screeds I was all over it with red pen and return to sender, because I knew how much it would piss her off.

this is a 28 year old who phoned me last october to say all the clocks in the house were an hour fast and what should he do about it?

ahhhhhaahahaha

should have told him to go to sleep for an hour to make up the difference...

ahhhhhaahahaha otm

My housemate left me a pass-agg note about.... i dunno, mice and ants and leaving donuts on the counter and rinsing out beer bottles (all of which I concede as valid points)... so I graded it "A+ Passive Aggressive" and left it where it was.

'Pon my return she had shredded her own note and was being mega friendly in a remorseful way.

or to go and change everyone else's clocks xp

Boy do I hate my housemates!!

Number one is an oblivious Japanese idiot who hasn't quite mastered the art of eating with his mouth closed. Number two is an eternal postgrad student who listens to fucking Ani DiFranco and has a hipster douche boyfriend with the shittest facial hair ever.

HOW DID I END UP IN THIS HELL??????

Dear Housemate 1 and Housemate 2,

Shag each other all you want, but please don't turn up the Steve Lamacq radio show REALLY LOUD to try and mask it. I'm trying to get some work done.

Cheers, etc.

Dear ILX,

Sorry for posting this, I sound mental.

Yours, etc.

Just hold up a sign saying "6.4" when they come out, and tell them the Romanian judge ran away.

Might have to knock on the door in a minute and ask what the name of that Half Man Half Biscuit song was he just played.

Gave her 30 days' notice I was moving out, wouldn't have been in such a hurry if she hadn't been a cunt about some things and forced the issue. That 30 days is up in less than a week, she has no one lined up, and I don't have my deposit back b/c there's no new tenant to get it from.

Therefore I have no money for my move.

I'm borrowing some out of necessity but a) it sucks, b) it's less than the full deposit so my options are limited, and c) FUCK THIS ANYWAY.

Why can't landlords, etc. understand that a security deposit is not just automatically their money to wantonly spend and not have on-hand when you're ready to move out?

Depending on where you live and the particulars of your situation, Laurel, a threat of legal action may be both advisable and wholly justified.

a security deposit is not just automatically their money to wantonly spend

You might want to check the tenant laws for your state - many states require security deposits to either be held in an escrow account or for the landlord to post a bond in lieu of escrow. There are generally laws about when the deposit has to be returned to you (in WA it's within 2 weeks of move-out) and under what circumstances it can be withheld/reduced.

Thank you, all, but unfort since my roommate is NOT leaving at the same time as me, my landlord doesn't enter into the picture. The flatmate who is staying is responsible for finding another tenant AND getting that person to pay ME my deposit.

She has done neither, is the problem.

Jaq: Technically it's NYC tenant law that LLs are supposed to deposit your deposit and give it back to you WITH INTEREST but I have never heard of anyone doing that EVER and I've never met a tenant who didn't think the idea of holding them to that was downright hilarious. Maybe at the super-high end of the market, that happens, where lawyers are involved. Not to those of us who live on actual Earth.

Dear Housemate 1 and Housemate 2,

Shag each other all you want, but please don't turn up the Steve Lamacq radio show REALLY LOUD to try and mask it. I'm trying to get some work done.

Cheers, etc.

My flatmate, who is also my younger brother, does this ALL THE TIME. It's really annoying because he'll have on good music and I'll be ready to go in and ask what is before I realise what's going on.

Actually it's better when he has the music on - a few nights ago he just told me "put your mp3 player on and listen to it for an hour", and it turned out that an hour was nowhere near enough

Pretty impressed at somebody keeping it up during the Steve Lamacq Show tbh

mostly my flatmates are fine but one of them.......continuously leaves loads and loads of long black hairs all over the shower. not just in the plughole, like just all around the porcelain. it really makes me want to puke or makes me not want a shower. hate the idea of saying it tho.

turned out that an hour was nowhere near enough

braggin by proxy 2010!

moving in with someone for the first time in 2.5 years this week. she seems pretty dope but we have to find a third person so it could all go pearshaped. I get a built-in wardrobe though.

moving into the family home (currently occupied by younger brother and, on a part-time basis, his young daughter) in september. not looking forward to it, not least because of noisy neighbours (am currently in a detached place with my girlfriend, who's going back to college).

I don't understand why it seems that everyone else finds it perfectly acceptable to keep your mouth wide the fuck open while eating. I mean, good lord, the sounds.

i was about to bitch about my roommate and celebrate that i only have 50 days left here, but in possibly the nicest gesture he's ever done he just helped me change a lightbulb in my room.

I am in a large house with 7 others, no horror stories as of yet, but it's been.... interesting

My bf just informed me that one of his housemates solves the problem of the DSL modem playing up and needing to be reset by...

...going to the mains, and flicking the mains power for the entire house off and then back on again.

What in the everloving stupid fuck.

aghhahgdjhjdk when people just leave piles of washing up in manky water IN THE SINK

i am very easy-going about leaving undone washing up on the side (within reason, like...2-3 days max maybe? oh let's not kid myself, i won't bloody notice) but PEOPLE NEED TO USE THE GODDAMN SINK FFS

I hate that. I leave dirty dishes on the counter and need the sink to be clean and empty to wash my hands and water the plants or whatever. My wife goes nuts if the counter's dirty though, so she piles everything in the sink.

and also must i reiterate this every week

it is pretty much the only domestic thing i get OCD about and i think i am 100% justified

when you are doing with the washing up sponge, don't leave it to fester in the sink. PICK IT UP AND RINSE IT AND SQUEEZE IT OUT AND LEAVE IT ON THE SIDE otherwise it'll just get completely disgusting within a week

xp i am on your side here! i need to fill up kettles and water bottles in the sink mostly. and also to do my OWN washing up because i am not washing up anyone else's shit.

fuck the counter tbh.

the sink in our bathroom is clogged, it takes about an hour for water to dissipate, and I think it's because my two roommates regularly dump their electric razor clippings + wash their hair in the sink

yesterday I had to brush my teeth in the kitchen because the bathroom sink was full of water that wouldn't go anywhere

*when you are done with the washing up sponge

Maybe we should move in together, lex. We'd get along real well over sink habits.

lex otm re: both sink and sponge. i've just discovered that i finally broke the housemate who leaves his dishes in the sink for days by using the most passive-aggressive technique available to me: doing his dishes. like relentlessly, silently, even if they were only there for ten minutes. gave it a couple weeks (of the entire house remarking on how nice the kitchen was) and then stopped, and lo and behold: it runs all by itself now. another confrontation elaborately avoided.

Landlord of the big, under-maintained and therefore cheap house where I live is selling up. Two of my housemates, a couple who have the lease, have asked me to move with them. I was really grateful for the offer, but they want to move to an apartment, not a house, and I said 'probably yes and thank you so much but let's talk about your criteria' - my #1 is enough space not to feel on top of one another, but that may not match theirs. If they have different priorities, they need to go with them and I need to find another place - I'm planning on trying to be done with studies and leaving Canada in less than 2 years; they'll be staying.

So, I asked them a couple of times to sit down and talk about it (including money issues re: the likely overlap in rent between old and new places) and they said let's do it after the coming weekend when your friends are visiting. While my friends were visiting they found a place and applied, and a few days later got accepted. I asked to see it, and was told I can see it 1 November. (They have the place from then, but don't have to move till mid-Dec). I said I'd prefer to see it earlier and was told that would be hassling the agent. Expressed my disappointment, and they scrambled to arrange a viewing for me next week.

They are lovely people but are acting oddly over this. It's so disappointing and makes me feel so insecure when people don't face up to saying the things they need to say and instead act defensive. I'd like to hear something like 'We didn't think it would all go this fast, and it would have been better if we'd talked first, and we're sorry about that, but we had to take the place fast. We'd still like you to live with us but totally understand if you turn out not to like it and want to live elsewhere'. For instance.