People that need to be rocketed into the sun

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The Hitchhikers Guide To The Galaxy postulated a colony-sized spaceship (the "B-Ark") in which all the useless people who were contributing to the acceleration of universal entropy and societal decay were loaded aboard and shot off into space.

I was reminded of this after seeing the steering-wheel laptop mount. Which asshat decided that steering-wheel mounted laptops would be a good idea? Sure, you're not *supposed* to use it while driving, but how much you wanna bet there will be a laptop related accident in the next 30-days?

Anyway, for the safety of the planet, the inventor of the laptop steering-wheel mount needs to be rocketed into the sun. Who else should be loaded aboard? Obviously, co-workers and politicians would qualify, but I'm really looking for macro-level stupidity. Things like poor designs, ill-advised inventions, etc. Co-workers and politicians can go on the next rocket.

Elvis Telecom (Chris Barrus), Wednesday, 10 December 2003 22:22 (twenty-one years ago)

Wouldn't we need a dedicated server for all the responses to this thread alone?

(To start with, the idiot patrons around here who lack common sense. A renewable non-resource.)

Ned Raggett (Ned), Wednesday, 10 December 2003 22:25 (twenty-one years ago)

Here's an example of what I'm after....

Putting a "pull" handle on the push side of a door. Here seen with the classic "hastily-laserprinted-correctional-signage".

http://www.quartzcity.net/~chris/blogpicts/bbc-pushpull.jpg

That's the entrance to the BBC New Media reception area by the way.

Elvis Telecom (Chris Barrus), Wednesday, 10 December 2003 22:26 (twenty-one years ago)

Haha Chris, that laptop thing is like the Dashboard Hibachi!

Spencer Chow (spencermfi), Wednesday, 10 December 2003 22:27 (twenty-one years ago)

Dashboard typists might not be any worse than highway makeup-appliers and ignorant cellphone users, tho'.

My vote goes for spammers and virus writers.

Baked Bean Teeth (Baked Bean Teeth), Wednesday, 10 December 2003 22:28 (twenty-one years ago)

"might not be any worse"

bad jode (Jody Beth Rosen), Wednesday, 10 December 2003 22:30 (twenty-one years ago)

they should all be deleted from humanity asap

bad jode (Jody Beth Rosen), Wednesday, 10 December 2003 22:31 (twenty-one years ago)

dude! i can play the Sims while I'm driving to shows in detroit! sweet!

Kingfish Beefstick (Kingfish), Wednesday, 10 December 2003 22:31 (twenty-one years ago)

Dashboard typists might not be any worse than highway makeup-appliers and ignorant cellphone users, tho'.

Probably not, but did the person who designed this REALLY think this was a good idea? You can use a cellphone anywhere, but this is rather specific.

Elvis Telecom (Chris Barrus), Wednesday, 10 December 2003 22:33 (twenty-one years ago)

People that send automatic PHONE CALL spam with a recorded voice telling you you've won something or other. One of these got me out of bed the other day, this is a worrying development.

udu wudu (udu wudu), Wednesday, 10 December 2003 22:34 (twenty-one years ago)

I don't think it was intended for people to use while driving.

gygax! (gygax!), Wednesday, 10 December 2003 22:34 (twenty-one years ago)

To start with, the idiot patrons around here who lack common sense.

At least have the common decency to spell my last name properly

nate detritus (natedetritus), Wednesday, 10 December 2003 22:35 (twenty-one years ago)

I don't think it was intended for people to use while driving.

but it would be ignorant of the inventor to think that they wouldn't do so.

bad jode (Jody Beth Rosen), Wednesday, 10 December 2003 22:36 (twenty-one years ago)

Jack Thompson, of http://www.stopkill.com/

Andrew Farrell (afarrell), Wednesday, 10 December 2003 22:37 (twenty-one years ago)

ie, not everyone works/studies in a building. when i was consulting, i would spend a lot of time driving around and after an appointment i'd get in my car and transcribe my notes, make phone calls, and you need an easy convenient place to put a laptop sometimes. if this was around back then, i'd have considered purchasing one.

*cue: guffaws the cubicle faction*

gygax! (gygax!), Wednesday, 10 December 2003 22:38 (twenty-one years ago)

hmmm, funny that they call them "laptops"

kephm, Wednesday, 10 December 2003 22:41 (twenty-one years ago)

The main folks that I want to see incinerated by the sun's fission are the fellows that buy a newspaper, pull out the sports section, and toss the rest of the paper on the floor of the BART without even looking in the "News" section, or the "Food & Wine" section.

Only then will my wrath cool a little.

andy, Wednesday, 10 December 2003 23:10 (twenty-one years ago)

I recently moved house. I called in advance and was given a new phone number by British Telecom. I asked them to transfer my account as it was, including my internet access. Turns out that when I left my old place they closed that account and started another. There was no phone line in at the new place, and after two days when I got my phone I couldn't get online as the new account didn't have internet access.

They informed me of this revoking by an email. To an account with no phone line and where they had revoked my internet access. Smart people.

Martin Skidmore (Martin Skidmore), Wednesday, 10 December 2003 23:13 (twenty-one years ago)

The ref in last night's Lyon v Celtic game. Cockfarmer. Its a masonic conspiracy etc.

Dave B (daveb), Thursday, 11 December 2003 12:27 (twenty-one years ago)

flying mother nature's silver seed to a new home in the sun:

http://news.bbc.co.uk/media/images/39511000/jpg/_39511540_bush1_pa300.jpg

Eisbär (llamasfur), Thursday, 11 December 2003 12:30 (twenty-one years ago)

Christ yes Martin, BT closed my account and started a new one with no problems - however a sneaky little direct debit got missed which I didn't notice until I got a letter from their lawyers!

They were nice though and cancelled the action until I got a Real Actual Bill.

OH CRAP I can't remember if I've paid it or not!!

Sarah (starry), Thursday, 11 December 2003 12:35 (twenty-one years ago)

DaveB otm, purely for the upset caused to Vicky

The Darkness
Radiohead
people who run karaoke nights
drivers who don't stop when I'm waiting to cross a zebra crossing
loads of other people, I'm a curmudgeaon in'I?

chris (chris), Thursday, 11 December 2003 12:39 (twenty-one years ago)

I didn't stop for a policeman this morning. FUCK THE SYSTEM

Ronan (Ronan), Thursday, 11 December 2003 12:39 (twenty-one years ago)

You ran him over?

Markelby (Mark C), Thursday, 11 December 2003 12:43 (twenty-one years ago)

Steering wheel laptop mount has only one excusable purpose: people who run GPS navigation software.

Colin Meeder (Mert), Thursday, 11 December 2003 12:45 (twenty-one years ago)

no he was forced to wait.

Ronan (Ronan), Thursday, 11 December 2003 12:49 (twenty-one years ago)

The National Westminster Bank and Robbie Williams, in an embrace of boiling death.

Markelby (Mark C), Thursday, 11 December 2003 12:51 (twenty-one years ago)

Cyclists that jump red lights. They can cycle their dumbass selves & stoopid bikes to the sun & burn baby burn!

Pinkpanther (Pinkpanther), Thursday, 11 December 2003 12:54 (twenty-one years ago)

RICHARD LITTLEJOHN. ferret faced twat.

Ronan (Ronan), Thursday, 11 December 2003 12:55 (twenty-one years ago)

I see what you're saying, Chris B, but I could use one of those as well! I mean, when I'm out at a property and I want to play on the laptop, I have to push the driver's seat all the way back and sit sideways (if it's nasty out).

Hmm... Who would I like to rocket to the sun...? I think we should all carry tickets around so when someone bugs us (ie: someone cutting in line at the 7-11/ someone at work), we can just hand them a ticket and say, "Congratulations! I got you a ticket to the sun for Christmas!"

Sarah McLusky (coco), Thursday, 11 December 2003 13:03 (twenty-one years ago)

All game show hosts, shock jocks and whatever the job description title is for 'people' like Jerry Springer....hope you packed your Factor 30!

Fred Nerk (Fred Nerk), Thursday, 11 December 2003 13:55 (twenty-one years ago)

Calum. Because he's absolutely 10th-dan black belt useless for any worthwhile human activity.

Fred Nerk (Fred Nerk), Thursday, 11 December 2003 14:12 (twenty-one years ago)

Trolls!

xpost

smee (smee), Thursday, 11 December 2003 14:13 (twenty-one years ago)

By that reckoning, Doomie must be about 362nd Dan black belt.

Markelby (Mark C), Thursday, 11 December 2003 14:14 (twenty-one years ago)

haha, *poof*

Ste (Fuzzy), Thursday, 11 December 2003 14:15 (twenty-one years ago)

steering-wheel laptop mount + blogging = Dashboard Confessional

nickalicious (nickalicious), Thursday, 11 December 2003 14:19 (twenty-one years ago)

three months pass...
People who use "sweet!" as an exclamation

Elvis Telecom (Chris Barrus), Saturday, 27 March 2004 01:18 (twenty-one years ago)

Michael Moore and Toby Keith should be locked in a room together with no windows/noticeable exits. See what they do to one another.

Zach Ayres (Z_Ayres), Saturday, 27 March 2004 02:12 (twenty-one years ago)

Haha, I've picked up using "sweet" as an exclamation from the woman I've been seeing. She says it very sweetly. It's pretty charming.

Spencer Chow (spencermfi), Saturday, 27 March 2004 02:23 (twenty-one years ago)

Based on the following evidence:
I say 'sweet' constantly for no reason
singing
other annoying qualities to be named later
it seems I am the one deserving of this status!
Set the controls for the heart etc

Donna Brown (Donna Brown), Saturday, 27 March 2004 03:47 (twenty-one years ago)

George Bush.Does it worry you Americans that your President is mental? I'm from Australia and we all think he's a complete loony! You should also take our Prime Minister John Howard with you. He's followed George everywhere else!

Ellen Lane (Ellen Lane), Saturday, 27 March 2004 17:02 (twenty-one years ago)

four months pass...
Anyone that has a DVD player in their car

Elvis Telecom (Chris Barrus), Saturday, 31 July 2004 10:09 (twenty-one years ago)

o cmon - don't be hating on pimp my ride

cinniblount (James Blount), Saturday, 31 July 2004 10:12 (twenty-one years ago)

PIMP MY RIDE PIMP MY RIDE PIMP MY RIDE PIMP MY RIDE PIMP MY RIDE PIMP MY RIDE

cinniblount (James Blount), Saturday, 31 July 2004 10:12 (twenty-one years ago)

ha ha ha ha ha oh god.

Pashmina (Pashmina), Saturday, 31 July 2004 10:13 (twenty-one years ago)

two months pass...
i'm not offended by this so much as amused, but i'll post it here anyway:

yesterday i was killing time in a barnes & noble (nyc-ers: it's the one downtown on 5th avenue, where they sell the college textbooks) and i wandered towards the back. an author was giving a reading of her children's book about halloween to a group of little kids (pre-kindergarten, it looked like). hmm, children's section. time to turn around and think about getting going. i started walking, keeping my eye out for any interesting-looking books, and immediately i noticed that about three feet from the back row of kiddie chairs was the beginning of barnes & noble's "sex" section. right there on the first bookcase, face out in plain view: the pop-up kama sutra.

motown modown (Jody Beth Rosen), Thursday, 28 October 2004 22:39 (twenty years ago)

three months pass...
Now boarding the big rocket to the sun: defense contractors who are now demanding royalties from model companies because their designs are considered to be "intellectual property." Never mind that most of them were developed with Pentagon/taxpayer funds.

So now if you're a model maker, you're limited to World War I and Nazi stuff.

Elvis Telecom (Chris Barrus), Thursday, 3 February 2005 20:19 (twenty years ago)

Herr Delay.

Michael White (Hereward), Thursday, 3 February 2005 20:32 (twenty years ago)

maybe mcdonnell douglas will market their own line of model weaponry.

Amateur(ist) (Amateur(ist)), Thursday, 3 February 2005 20:40 (twenty years ago)

one year passes...
dude on a message board yesterday, being completely serious:

"explain to me exactly what's wrong with slumlords?"

i had to go off the internet because of that.

flea market economy (Jody Beth Rosen), Thursday, 27 April 2006 16:55 (nineteen years ago)

What's so wrong with exploitation, Jody?

The Mercury Krueger (Ex Leon), Thursday, 27 April 2006 16:57 (nineteen years ago)

Right, now, this friend of mind. She's playing tiresome, paranoid games and pissing me the fuck off.

Not very interesting, but I had to vent.

chap who would dare to be a nerd, not a geek (chap), Thursday, 27 April 2006 17:25 (nineteen years ago)

six years pass...

disgusting savages/irrationally angry/shoot into sun = people who take your laundry out of the washing machine and leave it on top in a damp pile, instead of doing the humane thing and waiting a few minutes to see if the laundry-doer comes back.

sriracha bishop (get bent), Tuesday, 25 September 2012 22:47 (twelve years ago)

how many minutes had you been
i kinda thought that after getting burned by time spent in a laundromat early in our washing career we have all just become remorseless motherfuckers about this, keeping people waiting sucks

let's get the banned back together (schlump), Tuesday, 25 September 2012 22:54 (twelve years ago)

not that many minutes! i hate keeping ppl waiting too, but i didn't think anyone would be doing laundry on a tuesday afternoon.

sriracha bishop (get bent), Tuesday, 25 September 2012 22:57 (twelve years ago)

keeping people waiting sucks

fit and working again, Tuesday, 25 September 2012 23:51 (twelve years ago)


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