What's the Worst Song on NEVER MIND THE BOLLOCKS?

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Following in the tradition of this thread....

What's the worst song on London Calling?

...I'm turning the guns on another hallowed classic.

I'd say "Seventeen".

― Alex in NYC (vassifer), Thursday, 5 August 2004 21:08 (twenty-two years ago)

Dan's answer should be along any minute now...

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Thursday, 5 August 2004 21:12 (twenty-two years ago)

There are no worst songs. NMTB is the greatest thing ever made by human beings.

― noodle vague (noodle vague), Thursday, 5 August 2004 21:12 (twenty-two years ago)

They're all the wrost. That's why it changed the world, man.

― Sonny A. (Keiko), Thursday, 5 August 2004 21:12 (twenty-two years ago)

Dude "Seventeen" rules.

"Submission" maybe, but that's still pretty good.

― AaronHz (AaronHz), Thursday, 5 August 2004 21:29 (twenty-two years ago)

"Submission" is lyrically crap, but it's a great, great song. I'm not saying "Seventeen" sucks, but it's probably the weakest track on the album (to me, anyway).

― Alex in NYC (vassifer), Thursday, 5 August 2004 21:32 (twenty-two years ago)

I'M A LAZY SOD! C'mon I sing that all the time. When's the last time you heard someone sing "I'm on a submarine mission for you, baby"

Incidentally I think the story goes that Malcolm McClaren wanted Johnny to write a song about sm/submission and Johnny said fuck that I'm gonna sing about submarines.

― AaronHz (AaronHz), Thursday, 5 August 2004 21:38 (twenty-two years ago)

It's a wonderful lyric, wonderful song. "Goin' down, down, draggin' me down." Possibly lacks reference to bingo-hall astrological fascism.

― noodle vague (noodle vague), Thursday, 5 August 2004 21:39 (twenty-two years ago)

The one that fucking RIDICULOUSLY rips off "Roadrunner"

― Mr. Snrub, Thursday, 5 August 2004 21:40 (twenty-two years ago)

Yeah, but the riff of "Submission" (appropriated, arguably, from "Hello, I Love You" and/or "All Day and All of the Night") redeems it.

― Alex in NYC (vassifer), Thursday, 5 August 2004 21:40 (twenty-two years ago)

Strangely, I have still never heard Never Mind The Bollocks

I have heard Galaxie 500 doing 'Submission' though, and I liked it a lot at the time, 14 years ago.

― Alba (Alba), Thursday, 5 August 2004 21:41 (twenty-two years ago)

Funny thing - the songs that were considered filler ("Problems", "EMI" are the ones that I enjoy the most nowadays, just because the biggies have been overexposed...Like Alex, I'll say "Seventeen".

(But buy me a beer and I'll confess that it's "Anarchy" which truly leaves me the most unmoved. Kinda quaint, actually. Seemed much more repulsive when I first heard an uncle's copy on New Year's Eve 1977.)

― Myonga Von Bontee (Myonga Von Bontee), Thursday, 5 August 2004 21:42 (twenty-two years ago)

"Pretty Vacant"

― Rockist_Scientist (rockist_scientist), Thursday, 5 August 2004 21:42 (twenty-two years ago)

(Psych!)

― Rockist_Scientist (rockist_scientist), Thursday, 5 August 2004 21:43 (twenty-two years ago)

"liar" maybe?

― latebloomer (latebloomer), Thursday, 5 August 2004 21:43 (twenty-two years ago)

"EMI" is probably my favorite track, actually.

― Alex in NYC (vassifer), Thursday, 5 August 2004 21:44 (twenty-two years ago)

"Submission" maybe, but that's still pretty good.

I mean trying to pick your least favorite NMTB song is like picking your least favorite orgasm.
"Submission" kinda sticks out as a place where maybe the LP drags a bit, to me. I guess that's why I thought of it first.
I dunno, I never really got into "New York" either.
The rest I can't think of a bad thing to say about.

― AaronHz (AaronHz), Thursday, 5 August 2004 21:48 (twenty-two years ago)

liar seconded, but they are all pretty great.

― M@tt He1geson (Matt Helgeson), Thursday, 5 August 2004 21:49 (twenty-two years ago)

"Seventeen" gets my vote, too. It's still 346 times better than that Winger song.

― Pleasant Plains (Pleasant Plains), Thursday, 5 August 2004 21:51 (twenty-two years ago)

I don't have anything new to say (yeah, it's either "Seventeen" (until the end), or "Liar", or perhaps "New York"), so consider these requests for future "Worst Song on ____ Threads":
"Loveless"
"Unknown Pleasures"
"Revolver"
Watch as the fur starts flying, friendships are broken, and ILM swallows itself whole!

― Barry Bruner (Barry Bruner), Thursday, 5 August 2004 22:16 (twenty-two years ago)

"Loveless"- "Soon"
"Unknown Pleasures"- who cares
"Revolver"- "Eleanor Rigby"

*runs away*

― AaronHz (AaronHz), Thursday, 5 August 2004 22:22 (twenty-two years ago)

There are songs on Loveless?

― noodle vague (noodle vague), Thursday, 5 August 2004 22:24 (twenty-two years ago)

yeah you have to look at the inside cover for titles

WHY DO SOME BANDS DO THAT? I HATE THAT SHIT!

― AaronHz (AaronHz), Thursday, 5 August 2004 22:25 (twenty-two years ago)

Like these threads, Barry?

Worst songs on each of a favourite artist's albums

One bad track...

― Pleasant Plains (Pleasant Plains), Thursday, 5 August 2004 22:38 (twenty-two years ago)

also known as "DOO" or "Destroy Only One", here was my controversial one that Barry hinted at above:

DOO: Loveless

― gygax! (gygax!), Thursday, 5 August 2004 22:44 (twenty-two years ago)

haha, barry even posted on that thread!

― gygax! (gygax!), Thursday, 5 August 2004 22:47 (twenty-two years ago)

oh, I forgot about those ...
*sheepishly walks away*

― Barry Bruner (Barry Bruner), Thursday, 5 August 2004 23:01 (twenty-two years ago)

Barry now needs to answer this question to survive to the 2,500 dollar round.

What is the worst Power Station song?

― cs appleby (cs appleby), Friday, 6 August 2004 00:44 (twenty-two years ago)

"New York" by a mile.

― Chris Ott (Chris Ott), Friday, 6 August 2004 01:13 (twenty-two years ago)

But "Seventeen" is fucking hirlarious. "I can't even be bothered . . ." For me, the weakest track is definitely "Problems," "Submission" a distant second.

― Burr (Burr), Friday, 6 August 2004 02:33 (twenty-two years ago)

What is the worst Power Station song?
"Metropolis", or perhaps "It's More Fun To Compute", or ...

er, hang on, you're not talking about Kraftwerk, are you? ...

(cheers von Berlin)

― Barry Bruner (Barry Bruner), Friday, 6 August 2004 02:37 (twenty-two years ago)

http://pcs.linuxkidd.com/Wallpaper/Cartoons/ATHF_-_Carl.jpg

"It's all a buncha frickin' noise, dere!"

― your neighbor, Carl (vassifer), Friday, 6 August 2004 02:39 (twenty-two years ago)

Doesn't "New York" have a lyric about Cheech and Chong? I think that would automatically exepmt it from being the worst.

I say E.M.I.

― MikeDixon, Friday, 6 August 2004 03:23 (twenty-two years ago)

I would have to say Andy Taylor singing that Isley Brothers song.

It's an x-post, bitch.

― Pleasant Plains (Pleasant Plains), Friday, 6 August 2004 03:29 (twenty-two years ago)

Anybody says "No Feelings", I kick them in the head.

― AaronHz (AaronHz), Friday, 6 August 2004 03:31 (twenty-two years ago)

*obligatory Dan post*

Every song on this album suck diseased ass. If I could ensure that I would never, ever, ever hear a Sex Pistols song again, even by accident, I would do an insufferably smug dance of happiness. Even though I do recognize that it's a seminal album that struck a chord and made possible a lot of my favorite bands blah blah blah, it still is fucking awful and ought to be burned so that unsuspecting children aren't tricked into thinking that barely being able to play your instruments AUTOMATICALLY makes you a good band.

Also, John Lydon is an insufferable cunt who should have his legs kicked by pygmies.

*fin*

― VengaDan Perry (Dan Perry), Friday, 6 August 2004 03:36 (twenty-two years ago)

"liar" is most boring to me
whereas
"new york" is my favourite

― george gosset (gegoss), Friday, 6 August 2004 03:40 (twenty-two years ago)

it still is fucking awful and ought to be burned so that unsuspecting children aren't tricked into thinking that barely being able to play your instruments AUTOMATICALLY makes you a good band.

What are you? An Emerson Lake & Palmer fan or something?

― Alex in NYC (vassifer), Friday, 6 August 2004 03:46 (twenty-two years ago)

hey, if I had been an ELP fan, Bollocks would have beeen a healthy antidote to such a one-trick pony.

― george gosset (gegoss), Friday, 6 August 2004 03:53 (twenty-two years ago)

Anyone who says "Holidays In The Sun" is wrong, fyi.

― billstevejim, Friday, 6 August 2004 03:55 (twenty-two years ago)

or "Bodies"

― AaronHz (AaronHz), Friday, 6 August 2004 03:56 (twenty-two years ago)

I must plead the fifth. I mean, I haven't heard this album in its entirety for a long, long time. Therefor, I don't know which would be the worst. But I DO know which would be the *best* and Alex is right (again): "EMI" is where it's at.

I'm loving my Sex Pistols book, lately, though "I Swear I Was There: Sex Pistols And The Shape Of Rock" by David Nolan, about the two shows they did in Manchester and all the people they inspired by doing so. Someone gave this to me last Christmas and I've only now gotten around to really reading it. How the hell can you complain about a book that has quotes from the lead singer of Crispy Ambulance, Mark E. Smith AND Peter Hook? And Howard Devoto and Pete Shelley and...

I can honestly say I never had any true appreciation for the Pistols until I saw them live on video, though. Spellbinding.

― Bimble (bimble), Friday, 6 August 2004 04:38 (twenty-two years ago)

the sex pistols COULD play their instruments dan, what are you talking about?

― J.D. (Justyn Dillingham), Friday, 6 August 2004 05:33 (twenty-two years ago)

Reading about them

― Andrew Blood Thames (Andrew Thames), Friday, 6 August 2004 05:59 (twenty-two years ago)

Another vote for Seventeen.

Are we going to have a thread called "What's the Worst Song on DAMNED DAMNED DAMNED?" next?

― Stewart Osborne (Stewart Osborne), Friday, 6 August 2004 10:25 (twenty-two years ago)

i don't like the sex postols, and tho i hate to agree with VengaDan, he's pretty otm upthread

― roger adultery (roger adultery), Friday, 6 August 2004 10:49 (twenty-two years ago)

"Anarchy In The UK." Too slow, too ploddy, too much Brian May.

― Marcello Carlin, Friday, 6 August 2004 10:55 (twenty-two years ago)

all of them

― rentboy (rentboy), Friday, 6 August 2004 12:08 (twenty-two years ago)

None of them, I can barely tell the difference aside from a couple singles. This is a very good thing.

― Andrew Blood Thames (Andrew Thames), Friday, 6 August 2004 12:11 (twenty-two years ago)

Only someone who knows nothing about music and how to play music could claim that Steve Jones and Paul Cook "couldn't play their instruments".

― Dadaismus (Dada), Friday, 6 August 2004 12:19 (twenty-two years ago)

Oh copme on Dada, "everybody knows" that the guitars on "nevermind the bollocks" were actually played by:

a/ chris spedding
or
b/steven stewart from the enid
or
c/ who the fuck else ever
!!

― Pashmina (Pashmina), Friday, 6 August 2004 12:21 (twenty-two years ago)

The worst sone for me is prob: "liar", but it's still ok.

― Pashmina (Pashmina), Friday, 6 August 2004 12:22 (twenty-two years ago)

A guy from The Enid? Never heard that one before!

― Dadaismus (Dada), Friday, 6 August 2004 12:22 (twenty-two years ago)

People who are paying attention will note that I never said that The Sex Pistols themsleves couldn't play their instruments; I said that they inspire untalented asshats who can't play their instruments.

― VengaDan Perry (Dan Perry), Friday, 6 August 2004 12:24 (twenty-two years ago)

I kind of wish that was true, I must admit. It would be awesome. This guy I met in Cyprus was VERY adamant that this was so, and I asked him if he was getting "bollocks" mixed up w/kim wilde's debut album as well. He said no...

― Pashmina (Pashmina), Friday, 6 August 2004 12:25 (twenty-two years ago)

Last night we went out to buy clothes, and finding ourselves hungry, had to go to BURGER KING in a SHOPPING MALL b/c everywhere else was either full or shut. We sat upstairs w/NO-ONE else around, and the in-store PA was playing bad nu-metal. There was this track w/bits ripped off the theme musick to "mission impossible". Outside, these four teenagers were slamdancing. Outside Burger King, on the upper deck of a shopping mall. Just as wel left, Joy Division's "Transmission" came on the burger bar PA. This is punk in 2004!!!

― Pashmina (Pashmina), Friday, 6 August 2004 12:28 (twenty-two years ago)

Sorry Dan, you're right! But you're wrong as well.

― Dadaismus (Dada), Friday, 6 August 2004 12:30 (twenty-two years ago)

Which I also acknowledged: Even though I do recognize that it's a seminal album that struck a chord and made possible a lot of my favorite bands blah blah blah [...]

― VengaDan Perry (Dan Perry), Friday, 6 August 2004 12:32 (twenty-two years ago)

This is punk in 2004!!!

That was the Sex Pistols version of punk in 1977 too, just more people are buying the product now.

― rentboy (rentboy), Friday, 6 August 2004 12:32 (twenty-two years ago)

HA!!

― Pashmina (Pashmina), Friday, 6 August 2004 12:33 (twenty-two years ago)

one year passes...

I read something about Never Mind The Bollocks being remastered and reissued in July of this year, but I can't remember where I read it - am I completely mistaken?

― StanM (StanM), Sunday, 23 April 2006 00:56 (twenty years ago)

my copy sounds like absolute shit

"new york"

― a.b. (alanbanana), Sunday, 23 April 2006 01:15 (twenty years ago)

liar

― latebloomer (latebloomer), Sunday, 23 April 2006 01:16 (twenty years ago)

That's not "Cheech and Chong." "You're made in Japan from cheese and chalk."

― Rickey Wright (Rrrickey), Sunday, 23 April 2006 02:19 (twenty years ago)

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