FEDERICO MUST GO

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Because the other thread was too general and lacked passion.

This is Federico Martone's Friends Reunited entry (it was added last year so I don't think it's someone faking it):

In all it's entirety an overview of my own experiences since my insertion into the civillian landscape would not only render any reader unfairly incomprable, moreover the banality in which you contrive to exist in your futile landscape implicates to one's own that indeed i must strive to march forth with my own avant garde approach to life. In Synopsis, I have came... I have saw... and I have conquered each and every new frontier in which I have had the will to integrate then later excell into. My friends, if only you could see what these eyes have seen. If only you could taste what these very lips have caressed and if only i could share with each and everyone of you all the fruits of my human emotions. I wish for you all the justifacation of your own endeavour........
08/07/2002 18:43:17

(http://www.friendsreunited.co.uk/friendsreunited.asp?wci=MemberNotes&member_key=3633302)

I presume he is taking the piss with this. Perhaps it is actually genius?

But no, Anouska must stay because you can't get rid of the loud kid straight away and she wears no bra. Scott must stay because he is great. And Jon must stay because he is a queer fish.

― N. (nickdastoor), Sunday, 25 May 2003 12:59 (twenty-two years ago)

I love the idea that you are spending Sunday afternoon searching Friends Reunited for Big Brother related entries.

― Eyeball Kicks (Eyeball Kicks), Sunday, 25 May 2003 13:06 (twenty-two years ago)

I love it too! But actually I didn't find that myself - someone on BB forum had already thought to look. In my defence, I am at work and obsessed with distractions.

― N. (nickdastoor), Sunday, 25 May 2003 13:21 (twenty-two years ago)

B-but... this is scientific proof that Federico is the grebtest housemate ever and must STAY!

― Matt DC (Matt DC), Sunday, 25 May 2003 18:04 (twenty-two years ago)

OK N you have a good excuse (though you should be playing solitaire or tickling yourself really).

― Julio Desouza (jdesouza), Sunday, 25 May 2003 18:59 (twenty-two years ago)

I've been watching this second main show for 15 minutes and it's had maybe one minute of material we didn't see on Friday so far.

― Martin Skidmore (Martin Skidmore), Sunday, 25 May 2003 19:14 (twenty-two years ago)

Federico is wearing shades indoors. I now have to vote for him twice in order to discount my previous vote for Anouska on Friday night. Oh Big Brother, you are a cruel and expensive mistress.

― j0e (j0e), Sunday, 25 May 2003 19:40 (twenty-two years ago)

The poncey smug bastard Jude Law lookalike MUST GO. 09011214403

― Dom Passantino (Dom Passantino), Sunday, 25 May 2003 20:09 (twenty-two years ago)

Yeah, get rid of Fed. His "German" joke alienated me.

Keep all the others in. Jon has apparently been regaling the others with his thoughts on Lord Of The Rings. He has the potential to be wonderfully weird - bit like Penny from BB2.

― Ben Mott (Ben Mott), Sunday, 25 May 2003 21:05 (twenty-two years ago)

Jon's excitement at the fact that "this hob can go like from boiling to simmer, like that. Fwmmmmm" endeared the man to me.

― Dom Passantino (Dom Passantino), Sunday, 25 May 2003 21:10 (twenty-two years ago)

This is my first time watching Big Brother. Can anyone explain the pedalling, please?

― Martin Skidmore (Martin Skidmore), Sunday, 25 May 2003 21:46 (twenty-two years ago)

It's their first weekly task Martin, details here...

― j0e (j0e), Sunday, 25 May 2003 23:47 (twenty-two years ago)

Jon is clearly a prince among lunatics. Fed is just a try-hard.

― N. (nickdastoor), Monday, 26 May 2003 01:47 (twenty-two years ago)

Jon is great! Not of this world.

― jel -- (jel), Monday, 26 May 2003 08:25 (twenty-two years ago)

Fed's german joke = a staple of the "Al Murray - Pub Landlord" routine for at least five years...

i think the pedalling is a vicious task and they won't win it. although i approve of durational tasks because it gives them something to do this is going to turn them into sleep deprived nutters

― CarsmileSteve (CarsmileSteve), Monday, 26 May 2003 09:35 (twenty-two years ago)

This is like watching a load of students in Fresher's Week. Drunkenly breaking the diary-room chair was hysterical (not) - I wonder what other jolly pranks they'll get up to before the end of the week?

I like Cameron, though.

― C J (C J), Monday, 26 May 2003 09:39 (twenty-two years ago)

Justine has told the others that she's had a nose job. Apparently she's also usually "the life and soul of the party" - if the party is full of Elizabeth (BB2) clones, perhaps?

― Ben Mott (Ben Mott), Monday, 26 May 2003 10:03 (twenty-two years ago)

Justine had a nose job? you mean she asked for that ski-jump? blimey.

Cameron is a twat, he's getting right on my tits.

― chris (chris), Monday, 26 May 2003 10:56 (twenty-two years ago)

I like Cameron, purely because he puts me in mind of The Wicker Man.
"Corn dolls, and barley rigs..."

Fed and Anouska in the pedallo/playpen - potential comedy double act. Fed must still go. He made a casual remark about being gay, possibly to sow seeds with the audience, and frankly seems to be exhausting his limited repertoire very quickly.

I wonder if Jon is a Doctor Who fan as well as LOTR?? I'm hoping he's got a floppy hat and an absurdly long scarf in his case along with the fake boobies.

― Ben Mott (Ben Mott), Monday, 26 May 2003 11:03 (twenty-two years ago)

Fed told Anouska he had a boyfriend during one of their cycling shifts together last night.
His "confession" came after Anouska commented that most people in the house were single. To her surprise, Fed told her that he had a boyfriend named Frank on the outside, who he'd been seeing for a couple of months.
"He's really sexy," he said with a smile. "He often goes out of the night though whilst I'm indoors doing the ironing."

It's unknown whether Fed was just joking or being serious in a light-hearted manner -- either way, it's caused a fuss on the DigitalSpy forums, with some even suggesting it's a tactic to "win the gay vote".

Oh gawd. Please, please, please can we eventually have a gay male BB contestant who isn't a complete fucking dickhead?

― j0e (j0e), Monday, 26 May 2003 11:10 (twenty-two years ago)

12.58pm: [..] outside, Jon tells Sissy that his longest relationship was a couple of months since he left middle school. 'I haven't had a girlfriend in a decade', he says as Sissy asks him whether it bothers him or not.

Go Jon!

― N. (nickdastoor), Monday, 26 May 2003 12:48 (twenty-two years ago)

[not in a 'must go' sense]

― N. (nickdastoor), Monday, 26 May 2003 12:48 (twenty-two years ago)

Federico must go for singing 'Mysterious Ways' by U2

― Andrew L (Andrew L), Monday, 26 May 2003 14:28 (twenty-two years ago)

Jon's terrific post to a rec.arts.books.tolkein.:

Um, sorry if I'm being very dense, but I've never seen any mention of
Numenorean flying machines before. What are they?
Ta,
Jon Tickle

From Google's collection of his USENET posts

― N. (nickdastoor), Monday, 26 May 2003 15:54 (twenty-two years ago)

That's fantastic, N. Let's hope one of the tasks is in Dungeons & Dragons format. "As an aside, can I re-roll my chrisma?".

Jon's voice really reminds me of David Baddiel.

― Alfie (Alfie), Monday, 26 May 2003 17:50 (twenty-two years ago)

For mastering the art of wearing lemon and not looking like one, Federico must be granted another week.

― Lara (Lara), Tuesday, 27 May 2003 20:08 (twenty-two years ago)

am i the only person who loves cameron's accent?

― ailsa (ailsa), Tuesday, 27 May 2003 20:36 (twenty-two years ago)

I think so.

― Lara (Lara), Tuesday, 27 May 2003 20:36 (twenty-two years ago)

but it reminds me of home

― ailsa (ailsa), Tuesday, 27 May 2003 20:39 (twenty-two years ago)

but further south...

― ailsa (ailsa), Tuesday, 27 May 2003 20:39 (twenty-two years ago)

He sounds like he's been chewing the cud for too long and his jaw's become loose.

― Lara (Lara), Tuesday, 27 May 2003 20:41 (twenty-two years ago)

I don't know if these British shows work this way, but the first week of American reality shows and dating shows, when everyone's getting to know each other, some people have this odd little "my personality and the way I am" patter that they pull awkwardly out of their sleeves and will often just KEEP TALKING, their voices rising in pitch, eyes growing wider, realizing perhaps that they have just flown right off the edge with no ground beneath them but are powerless to stop the inanities that flow, unhindered, from their nonsensically flapping jaws. The classic here is of course "I like to get wild" said in the most boring voice imaginable. Or "I'm really straightforward. Like, I'll ALWAYS say what's on my mind. I'm very assertive." Okay, so assert something already. Sorry.

― Tracer Hand (tracerhand), Tuesday, 27 May 2003 21:19 (twenty-two years ago)

Ha, you have described Nush. Nush = Lady Victoria Hervey= DUD!

― ailsa (ailsa), Tuesday, 27 May 2003 21:22 (twenty-two years ago)

am i the only person who loves cameron's accent?

Archel to thread!

― caitlin (caitlin), Wednesday, 28 May 2003 09:51 (twenty-two years ago)

Cameron to win, indeed! But it's not the accent. I just can't help rooting for these country bumpkin religious fisherman types. And he seems like he's a good boy to his parents.

― Archel (Archel), Wednesday, 28 May 2003 10:00 (twenty-two years ago)

I'm going to laugh at you all when Cameron turns out to be a web designer.

― Matt DC (Matt DC), Wednesday, 28 May 2003 10:16 (twenty-two years ago)

he only is if it's a web to catch FUSH in, like a big underwater spider...

― CarsmileSteve (CarsmileSteve), Wednesday, 28 May 2003 10:18 (twenty-two years ago)

He said on his introductory video bit that he's a Fish Trader.

― caitlin (caitlin), Wednesday, 28 May 2003 11:13 (twenty-two years ago)

ITAE? (I know we've done that joke elsewhere already but never mind.)

Um, NUSH MUST GO?

― Archel (Archel), Wednesday, 28 May 2003 11:28 (twenty-two years ago)

But she's so beautiful!

― Martin Skidmore (Martin Skidmore), Wednesday, 28 May 2003 16:45 (twenty-two years ago)

Federico must go! (just getting the thread back on track)

― jel -- (jel), Wednesday, 28 May 2003 16:51 (twenty-two years ago)

Yep, they've got failed the pedallo task all because Fed wanted some chewing gum.

― Ben Mott (Ben Mott), Wednesday, 28 May 2003 16:56 (twenty-two years ago)

Yep, they've just failed the pedallo task all because Fed wanted some chewing gum.

― Ben Mott (Ben Mott), Wednesday, 28 May 2003 16:56 (twenty-two years ago)

also, dreadfully biassed editing last night i thought, showing poor old jontickle talking about star wars ep 7 (or whatever) and seemingly sending everyone to sleep...

i'm sure he is having non sci-fi/physics/geekoid conversations, but they don't seem to want to show them...

― CarsmileSteve (CarsmileSteve), Thursday, 29 May 2003 10:29 (twenty-two years ago)

Heat Magazine wuvs Jontickle - i saw it on mel and sue this morning.

― Alan (Alan), Thursday, 29 May 2003 10:38 (twenty-two years ago)

I want Jon to win now, just because he's such a geek.

― caitlin (caitlin), Thursday, 29 May 2003 11:37 (twenty-two years ago)

Also his name is Tickle. I've not watched since Friday though so what do I know.

― Tico Tico (Tico Tico), Thursday, 29 May 2003 11:52 (twenty-two years ago)

Maybe he's *so* geeky his name is actually Jon Tcl.

― caitlin (caitlin), Thursday, 29 May 2003 12:01 (twenty-two years ago)

http://community.channel4.com/6/ubb.x?a=tpc&s=162603557&f=31360877&m=84560648

― Alan (Alan), Thursday, 29 May 2003 13:43 (twenty-two years ago)

I've learnt more from JT in four days than I did from the past 3 series, when are people going to get past the idea that big wabs are the be all and end all.

BIG WABS MUST GO!

― Archel (Archel), Thursday, 29 May 2003 14:23 (twenty-two years ago)

The weird thing I, I know someone called Jon Tickle. He's Australian, though, and once got suspended for bringing an Afghan flag to school.

― Dom Passantino (Dom Passantino), Thursday, 29 May 2003 14:39 (twenty-two years ago)

jon must win because he is kinda of an ILX archetype. I mean, I can just see him becoming a regular poster once he gets out of the house.

― jel -- (jel), Thursday, 29 May 2003 14:55 (twenty-two years ago)

"What's to stop the BB housemates turning up here after the show?"

― Cozen (Cozen), Thursday, 29 May 2003 18:11 (twenty-two years ago)

bump. FEDERICO MUST GO.

― Alan (Alan), Friday, 30 May 2003 08:27 (twenty-two years ago)

Ring 09011 21 44 03

― Ben Mott (Ben Mott), Friday, 30 May 2003 08:59 (twenty-two years ago)

(or if you're me, last number redial)

― Alan (Alan), Friday, 30 May 2003 09:04 (twenty-two years ago)

WHAT IS WRONG WITH FEDERICO? Why will no one tell me?

― Emma, Friday, 30 May 2003 09:06 (twenty-two years ago)

1) he is not a young bra-less female
2) he is not Jon

― Archel (Archel), Friday, 30 May 2003 09:15 (twenty-two years ago)

Oh I forgot Scott is up too. Federico vs Scott FITE.

― Archel (Archel), Friday, 30 May 2003 09:16 (twenty-two years ago)

what archel said. plus mucking up task so pointlessly = he is fule. scott seems nice - nothing against him

― Alan (Alan), Friday, 30 May 2003 09:17 (twenty-two years ago)

Federico -

shallow poser, cocky, arrogant, pretentious (look at his FR entry), immature and as for any redeeming features...

― Ben Mott (Ben Mott), Friday, 30 May 2003 09:26 (twenty-two years ago)

Federico's redeeming feature = he is a hottie. You know, it is only meant to be women who are jealous of other women being good looking but men just veil it by accusing each other of being a 'poser' (this is not just aimed at you Ben, for all I know you are World No 1 Superhottie).

Anyway he is a rampaging mass of hormones and clearly prepared to shag any and all of the girls and for that reason must stay. I admire a man with such broad taste in women, he is not picky at all. And he could afford to me.

― Emma, Friday, 30 May 2003 09:30 (twenty-two years ago)

Did he really cock up the task because he got out of the pedalo to get some chewing gum? What an arse. He is supremely smug and punchable, he must go

― chris (chris), Friday, 30 May 2003 09:30 (twenty-two years ago)

(Curse my slow arthritic fingers that fail to correct Freudian spelling errors in time.)

Anyway re the task. I didn't actually see the cock up but from the way the others all thought it wasn't a problem while they were awaiting the result, presumably he didn't do anything tremendously bad. Also I got the impression he'd only just got out of bed to take his turn when it happened. Like none of you have ever done something stupid but absent minded when you've just got out of bed.

― Emma, Friday, 30 May 2003 09:32 (twenty-two years ago)

The main reason the others all thought it wasn't a problem, I thought, was that he hadn't told many of them about it. *He* thought it would be - they all spotted how worried he was looking beforehand.

― caitlin (caitlin), Friday, 30 May 2003 09:38 (twenty-two years ago)

it is only meant to be women who are jealous of other women being good looking but men just veil it by accusing each other of being a 'poser'

I haven't got Scott down as a poseur, but I do think he's better looking than F.

― Alan (Alan), Friday, 30 May 2003 09:40 (twenty-two years ago)

Well who was he in the pedalo with? Scott - who was talking about it as if he was there - didn't seem to think Federico had done anything too bad. And besides - it was a momentary lapse, not some kind of machiavellian plot to deprive the others. Cut a guy some slack you people. I would rather watch Federico being decorative for another week than have Jon T boring my tits off.

Ha ha Alan fancies Scott. He is quite cute but a bit goofy.

― Emma, Friday, 30 May 2003 09:43 (twenty-two years ago)

(Scott, I mean. I think. ha)

― Emma, Friday, 30 May 2003 09:44 (twenty-two years ago)

Certainly not Machiavellian. However at the time Anouska (in pedalo with him) did say DON'T and he said, oh this isn't against the rules. So it was wilful insouciance (haha can you have that?) at the very least.

― Archel (Archel), Friday, 30 May 2003 09:46 (twenty-two years ago)

Yes, I want to do Scott. Most laffs so far have been Anoushka and Jon (separately). Jon is NOT boring. I loved his "knowing" recitation of Hotel California lyrics "You can check out, but you can never leave" ahhh, do you see, it's like the BB house. NO IT'S ABOUT ADDICTION . ah but do you see, aaaah, yes, ahhh. BB house = addiction. er. right

― Alan (Alan), Friday, 30 May 2003 09:47 (twenty-two years ago)

Anyway it will do Gos & Justine good to have a bit less food for a week. I don't see what all the fuss is about.

oh AND AND AND also Federico MUST STAY cos the way Marcus wotsisface pronounces his name r0X.

― Emma, Friday, 30 May 2003 09:48 (twenty-two years ago)

I haven't laffed at anything Jon has said cos all I hear when he speaks is BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH. zzzzzzzz

― Emma, Friday, 30 May 2003 09:49 (twenty-two years ago)

I predict that all this Jon-lovin' will save him and Scott will actually be evicted.

But then again, I haven't seen it since Friday and am clueless.

― Matt DC (Matt DC), Friday, 30 May 2003 09:50 (twenty-two years ago)

Also if you have a chef in the house it is a doddle to feed everyone for 70p a day. Just make big soups/stews and don't drink so much.

I agree with Matt that Scott will go. Inertia creeps.

― Archel (Archel), Friday, 30 May 2003 09:51 (twenty-two years ago)

Ha ha Emma and Alang = New Kate and Whoever!!

― chris (chris), Friday, 30 May 2003 09:54 (twenty-two years ago)

My opinion of Federico isn't based on looks. I can see why some people might warm to his "wilful insouciance" but I just think he's a tosser.

Anouska is still a favourite to go tonight.

― Ben Mott (Ben Mott), Friday, 30 May 2003 09:55 (twenty-two years ago)

well, of course, it's always a woman who goes first (sada, penny, scottish bird i can't remember the name of), but i think it would be a shame if anouska went. jon has to stay obv and scott is anonymous enough to escape, so fred it is...

― CarsmileSteve (CarsmileSteve), Friday, 30 May 2003 10:05 (twenty-two years ago)

WHY DOES JON HAVE TO STAY? feh, it is so TYPICAL of ILE to support someone like him. sigh.

― Emma, Friday, 30 May 2003 10:10 (twenty-two years ago)

DON'T CALL HIM FRED -- oo, he'd hate that. He made a thing about getting his name right on the first night. nob.

― Alan (Alan), Friday, 30 May 2003 10:17 (twenty-two years ago)

Yeah he should've just taken it and spent the next 10 weeks (I hope) being called the wrong name. HOW DARE HE? The cheek of the man.

― Emma, Friday, 30 May 2003 10:21 (twenty-two years ago)

one of us one of us one of us [jon that is]

― CarsmileSteve (CarsmileSteve), Friday, 30 May 2003 10:22 (twenty-two years ago)

Why, do you all have t-shirts saying 'Tickle - Chosen by God, loved by women' on the back?

― Emma, Friday, 30 May 2003 10:23 (twenty-two years ago)

I think it's more the fact that he insists on being called by his full first name. If your name is over five letters long, it's gonna be shortened. I don't go around telling everyone to call me Domenico now, do I?

Plus, do we really need another simpleton poser shark-fin haircutted prick-knight winning another reality TV show?

― Dom Passantino (Dom Passantino), Friday, 30 May 2003 10:26 (twenty-two years ago)

yeah, what's the matter with Fed, Em?

jon would clearly enjoy this conversation.

― CarsmileSteve (CarsmileSteve), Friday, 30 May 2003 10:28 (twenty-two years ago)

I have known plenty of people who don't like their names to be abbreviated and it's up to them, it's their name. Or people who object to certain abbreviations. Wasn't there a thread while ago about Michael / Mike / Micky or something?

Also I am a bit confused that people accuse Federico of being shallow and then object to him on the grounds of his haircut. hmm.

― Emma, Friday, 30 May 2003 10:32 (twenty-two years ago)

It's not JUST his haircut, Emma. It's his jacket and jeans as well.

― Matt DC (Matt DC), Friday, 30 May 2003 10:40 (twenty-two years ago)

And the fact he's stolen Jude Law's face.

― Dom Passantino (Dom Passantino), Friday, 30 May 2003 10:41 (twenty-two years ago)

b-but, emma, *Heat* likes Jon

― Alan (Alan), Friday, 30 May 2003 10:49 (twenty-two years ago)

Not in this week's issue (ie the only one that's been out since BB has been on). They quote his naff t-shirt and say 'Like who, exactly?'. If they want to change their editorial line at this stage then that is up to them but I still think Jon is utterly dull and without redeeming qualities and must go.

I mean, FAKE BOOBS? Hello?

― Emma, Friday, 30 May 2003 10:57 (twenty-two years ago)

TO BE FAIR he didn't object to 'Fed' - it was 'Fred' that he hated which is fair enough as it is NOT a shortening of his name. I feel like defending him now, so SCOTT MUST GO.

Jon reminds me of the villain in Star Trek Nemesis which he'd no doubt be happy with. But you know what? If he actually DID show up here he would probably be dismissed as a droning troll. Admit it.

― Archel (Archel), Friday, 30 May 2003 11:12 (twenty-two years ago)

Federico must stay! After a boring few days in which everyone's been pleasant, he has singlehandedly created future drama by a) fucking up the task, so evryone will be hungry and moany next week, and b) lying about the details of his fucking up (he said he kept a foot in the pedalo) in front of people who saw what really happened.

Scott must go! He contributes nothing.

Anouska must stay! She is a mouthy idiot - perfect BB material.

John must stay! He is the strangest man I've ever seen.

― Eyeball Kicks (Eyeball Kicks), Friday, 30 May 2003 12:08 (twenty-two years ago)

EK OTM re: J

― CarsmileSteve (CarsmileSteve), Friday, 30 May 2003 12:32 (twenty-two years ago)

Don't you find that they are all acceptable? No one is annoyingly irritating at all. I think Fed is ok & I'm torn about who should go tonight. I guess Jon, as he really doesnt bring anything to the house. I think it's too early to get rid of Anoushka, as she could prove to be another Adele!

― Pinkpanther (Pinkpanther), Friday, 30 May 2003 12:55 (twenty-two years ago)

I miss Adele. She wuz my GURL.

― Dan Perry (Dan Perry), Friday, 30 May 2003 13:09 (twenty-two years ago)

Yeah, you had to feel sorry for her when she was saying how bad it was that she had to hide her face when she went out in public now & keep a low profile, NOT!! What did she expect! I know it's a gameshow & all that but geez! (fair enuff Dan ;) )

― Pinkpanther (Pinkpanther), Friday, 30 May 2003 13:11 (twenty-two years ago)

Now that I've finally had a chance to review the website and learn more about this Jon person...eep. Although there was indeed a reference to Numenorean flying machines in one of the manuscript collections and...*wibbles away*

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Friday, 30 May 2003 14:37 (twenty-two years ago)

NED MUST GO!!

― mark s (mark s), Friday, 30 May 2003 14:43 (twenty-two years ago)

*weeps bitter tears*

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Friday, 30 May 2003 14:50 (twenty-two years ago)

Jon is clearly a genius! He knoew the words to Hotel California!

If Jon goes it will be just another case of aggressive normalcy ruining this country.

― jel -- (jel), Friday, 30 May 2003 15:04 (twenty-two years ago)

SHOCKER!

Jon to win!

― jel -- (jel), Friday, 30 May 2003 18:51 (twenty-two years ago)

Scott: "Don't think about that... just... don't think... about anything."

― Cozen (Cozen), Friday, 30 May 2003 19:03 (twenty-two years ago)

WHO IS OUT? I was in Waitrose and missed it. WHAT IS THE SHOCKER?

― Eyeball Kicks (Eyeball Kicks), Friday, 30 May 2003 19:05 (twenty-two years ago)

Anoushka is out!

― Martin Skidmore (Martin Skidmore), Friday, 30 May 2003 19:07 (twenty-two years ago)

That's who I thought would be out. Civilisation - despite everything - hates big breasts.

― Eyeball Kicks (Eyeball Kicks), Friday, 30 May 2003 19:11 (twenty-two years ago)

TICKLEMANIA IS TAKING OVER! 46% voted for Annie... you cannot keep a good man down.

― Dom Passantino (Dom Passantino), Friday, 30 May 2003 19:19 (twenty-two years ago)

OH MY GOD Anoushka is gorgeous.

― Dan Perry (Dan Perry), Friday, 30 May 2003 19:41 (twenty-two years ago)

I was thinking the same thing, Mr. Perry! What a surprise.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Friday, 30 May 2003 19:50 (twenty-two years ago)

Jon will win now, and conquer the statscock by December!

― jel -- (jel), Friday, 30 May 2003 19:56 (twenty-two years ago)

There are at least two better looking women still in there, in Nush and Tania. Maybe the other three women too - it's a very attractive bunch.

― Martin Skidmore (Martin Skidmore), Friday, 30 May 2003 20:07 (twenty-two years ago)

The pictures I've seen of Tania don't appeal to me at all. Nush... well, from her headshot on the BB4 site I thought she was in her 50s. She is pretty cute in that boomin' granny way, though.

― Dan Perry (Dan Perry), Friday, 30 May 2003 20:09 (twenty-two years ago)

I think Nush is absolutely gorgeous. She reminds me of a lovely former colleague with whom I danced at length a couple of Christmases ago.

― Martin Skidmore (Martin Skidmore), Friday, 30 May 2003 20:19 (twenty-two years ago)

Nush is one of the most beautiful people I've ever seen. Then again, I'm a sucker for a tall posh lass.

― Dom Passantino (Dom Passantino), Friday, 30 May 2003 20:25 (twenty-two years ago)

Tania I don't find attractive at all. Nush is very beautiful. But I find Sissy sexiest mostly because of - no joke - her teeth. There's something about them that really turns me on.

― Eyeball Kicks (Eyeball Kicks), Friday, 30 May 2003 20:54 (twenty-two years ago)

Nush= very pretty

Tania = has the mouth of a corpse, really nasty.

― chris (chris), Friday, 30 May 2003 21:13 (twenty-two years ago)

I got stuck w/ soddin' Federico in a sweepstake. So he must stay now sigh

― Andrew L (Andrew L), Friday, 30 May 2003 21:25 (twenty-two years ago)

Does Federico know his sweet cherry ass is being raffled off like this?

― Dan Perry (Dan Perry), Friday, 30 May 2003 21:39 (twenty-two years ago)

How wld I get a message to him?

― Andrew L (Andrew L), Friday, 30 May 2003 21:46 (twenty-two years ago)

I want Sissy and Fed to go next.

― jel -- (jel), Saturday, 31 May 2003 06:43 (twenty-two years ago)

HIDDEN PUB!! HIDDEN PUB!!!!

fed must go after that *excrutiating* sexual harrassment of BB...

― CarsmileSteve (CarsmileSteve), Monday, 2 June 2003 07:51 (twenty-two years ago)

God yes, that was appalling. As I mentioned in a frenzied text last night "He has DATE RAPIST written all over him".

Can I be the first to say (after it actually started) that this is the best BB yet. Hidden Pub!

― Alan (Alan), Monday, 2 June 2003 07:57 (twenty-two years ago)

I still haven't watched it since the first night, but I am a BB rockist and have no truck with this hidden pub rubbish.

What hidden pub, anyway?

― Matt DC (Matt DC), Monday, 2 June 2003 07:58 (twenty-two years ago)

wait till week four: hidden oubliette!!

― mark s (mark s), Monday, 2 June 2003 08:11 (twenty-two years ago)

further proof that JTMS:

Mirror Story on Saturday

THAT email in 3544 word fullness

― CarsmileSteve (CarsmileSteve), Monday, 2 June 2003 12:49 (twenty-two years ago)

Wow. That's some email. Those psychiatric sessions sound remarkably intense.

Is that the longest piece of copy ever printed in the Mirror?

― N. (nickdastoor), Monday, 2 June 2003 12:58 (twenty-two years ago)

my browser won't let me read the email but i'm hoping he's left a sequence of ever-more astounding time-delay coups-de-computer-theatre, one for each week he's still in there

#10 = "I for one welcome our new insect overlords"

― mark s (mark s), Monday, 2 June 2003 13:06 (twenty-two years ago)

it wasn't in the paper itself, it directed you to the website to read it.

― CarsmileSteve (CarsmileSteve), Monday, 2 June 2003 13:08 (twenty-two years ago)

it directed me to an unrelated pop-up!!

― mark s (mark s), Monday, 2 June 2003 13:11 (twenty-two years ago)

also also, CUB SCOUT TASK!!! piece of pi$$ mate, they don't even have to do knots or anything. although if i could point out that it's pronounced AR-KAY-LAR, not the eleventeen diferent ways they been saying it...

― CarsmileSteve (CarsmileSteve), Monday, 2 June 2003 13:13 (twenty-two years ago)

That was more dull than reading ILE! So who is going to invite him to post after the show?

― doom-e (Jam), Monday, 2 June 2003 13:18 (twenty-two years ago)

AR-KAY-LAR WE'LL DO OUR BEST

haha, I get back from my hols in France to discover that, quelle surprise, the "fact" that someone from my work was on BB was one big wind-up, and the guy from Medical Division who was supposed to be on *really was* at a conference in New York (NB these rarely last a quarter of year now do they?).

― MarkH (MarkH), Monday, 2 June 2003 13:52 (twenty-two years ago)

yes but they often do involve a hidden pub

― mark s (mark s), Monday, 2 June 2003 13:59 (twenty-two years ago)

Fed should be kicked out of BB for breaking the rules. Doesn't say that those engaging in threatening behaviour will be thrown out?

― jel -- (jel), Monday, 2 June 2003 14:56 (twenty-two years ago)

Loved the "secret" bad taste Austin Powers shag pad on Saturday night!

"It's my happening, baby, and it freaks me out!"

― Ben Mott (Ben Mott), Monday, 2 June 2003 15:17 (twenty-two years ago)

i hope that very creepy coprophilia chat-up routine is shown again on the night of his eviction
from now on his name is mr poopy

― Snowy Mann (rdmanston), Monday, 2 June 2003 15:39 (twenty-two years ago)

Big Brother should say 'please state the nature of the medical emergency' next time jon goes into the diary room for a chat.

and if jon's so clever, why was he cutting the grass in his bare feet?

andy

― koogs (koogs), Monday, 2 June 2003 18:08 (twenty-two years ago)

Because that's the way hobbits cut grass?

― Nicole (Nicole), Monday, 2 June 2003 18:15 (twenty-two years ago)

Vox pops on Jon's toaster idea (on today's BBLB) - totally classic. 'I have been eating toast for a long time. And yes, this is a very good idea'.

― N. (nickdastoor), Monday, 2 June 2003 18:57 (twenty-two years ago)

The passion with whom Jon related his "time-delayed" toaster was just brilliant. The look of sheer disbelief on Steph's face was hysterical.

Jon's just classic. How could anyone describe him as dud?

― Ben Mott (Ben Mott), Monday, 2 June 2003 20:51 (twenty-two years ago)

why not just have two toasters? surely the toaster would not be affordable by normal people since it would have to have two separate elements in separate, insulated [to some degree] chambers. maybe this is what jon wants--a toasting-based class hierarchy. damn him.

also.

why not just pronounce 'think' not as 'fink' and 'brother' not as 'bruvver'? especially when you're glaswegian and not cockney. maybe this is what federico wants--to seem fick. damn him. not vat I fink all cockneys are fick.

― RJG (RJG), Monday, 2 June 2003 22:21 (twenty-two years ago)

Jon Tickle must go. No reason.

Federico must stay. Some reasons.

― Cozen (Cozen), Monday, 2 June 2003 22:23 (twenty-two years ago)

thederico.

― RJG (RJG), Monday, 2 June 2003 22:25 (twenty-two years ago)

Fred.

― Cozen (Cozen), Monday, 2 June 2003 22:26 (twenty-two years ago)

thred.

― RJG (RJG), Monday, 2 June 2003 22:27 (twenty-two years ago)

"Perhaps it is genius."

― Cozen (Cozen), Monday, 2 June 2003 22:28 (twenty-two years ago)

actually?

he can't even spell quite well.

there are no reasons for him to STAY.

― RJG (RJG), Monday, 2 June 2003 22:30 (twenty-two years ago)

He is my claim to fame. He is liable to perform more excruciating voices (what was that one: some cockeyed Dutch or inchoate Mafioso Italian?). He has nice hair (ok, ok). Um...

― Cozen (Cozen), Monday, 2 June 2003 22:32 (twenty-two years ago)

he is a shit claim to fame, soz,

: /

& he doesn't even have nice hair.

― RJG (RJG), Monday, 2 June 2003 22:36 (twenty-two years ago)

I have had a change of mind, Jon must go, stupid, smug, superior control freak. I read the e-mail and thought "fair enough, decent bloke" and had nothing against him, but watching last night's BB I was just overcome with an intense loathing for him as he fluttered around the house imparting wisdom. I hope hedoes turn up here so I can call him a twunt to his cyber-face.

Plus he likes team building games/exercises = he must be eradicated from the face of the earth.

― chris (chris), Tuesday, 3 June 2003 07:26 (twenty-two years ago)

Also, he sounds like david baddiel...

― Vicky (Vicky), Tuesday, 3 June 2003 07:50 (twenty-two years ago)

obv. he's a bit of a cock. that's not the point.

― N. (nickdastoor), Tuesday, 3 June 2003 07:52 (twenty-two years ago)

that's the *entire* point. isn't it?

On the toaster thing -- he hasn't quite thought it through, Sure you need a delay, but you also need different heating elements or those extra few seconds might make all the difference between a nice crisp tan and carbon

― Alan (Alan), Tuesday, 3 June 2003 07:54 (twenty-two years ago)

Anouska was such an ickly pretty thing on Mel:Sue this morning. What a cutie! (Do not read this if you are Emma)

― Alan (Alan), Tuesday, 3 June 2003 07:55 (twenty-two years ago)

Well yes but there are cocks and cocks. He's the right kind.

― N. (nickdastoor), Tuesday, 3 June 2003 07:59 (twenty-two years ago)

no, HE LIKES TEAM BUILDING EXERCISES!!! N. if you were working for him you'd be having group hugs within a second of walking through the door.

This is the wrong kind

― chris (chris), Tuesday, 3 June 2003 08:06 (twenty-two years ago)

I fear Cabbage is right here. Team building exercises are the tools of Satan => Jon is one of Satan's little wizards.

― RickyT (RickyT), Tuesday, 3 June 2003 08:14 (twenty-two years ago)

Jon's toaster: maybe you don't need separate elements if the mechanism actually TAKES IN the second slice a few seconds later as well as popping it up later, then both slices are still toasted for the same length of time...

I still don't know exactly what Fed did/said to Big Brother - Matt thinks he waved his willy around but this is not true is it?

I think I wd like team-building exercises too if I were on BB. Just for something to do.

― Archel (Archel), Tuesday, 3 June 2003 08:20 (twenty-two years ago)

I didn't see this either, but apparently Fed did a really poor/lewd Avid Merrion impression and Big Brother that night, a Big Sister, was offended.

― suzy (suzy), Tuesday, 3 June 2003 08:23 (twenty-two years ago)

Hm, I think Fed is on a self-destruct mission - do something stupid then grovel about it several times over in diary room with staring eyes. Repeat until evicted (ie. this Friday).

― Archel (Archel), Tuesday, 3 June 2003 08:30 (twenty-two years ago)

Fed should stay I reckon; the more people on TV to fantasise destroying the better for society in general.

Does anyone else think Sissy looks remarkably like the ginger one from Girls Aloud?

― ss, Tuesday, 3 June 2003 08:31 (twenty-two years ago)

When I was in the gym last night I was attempting to find something worth listening to on the radio and inadvertently came across ILE fave Chris Moyles going on about how great Jon is and how much he wants him to stay /win. Ha ha you are all like Chris Moyles.

― Emma, Tuesday, 3 June 2003 08:34 (twenty-two years ago)

haha emma you were LISTENING to chris moyles

jon's toaster is stupid bcz you have to be simultaneously eating one piece of toast and buttering another

unless the time delay = like five mins

― mark s (mark s), Tuesday, 3 June 2003 08:37 (twenty-two years ago)

No I was flicking through stations and heard someone banging on about how great Jon is and thought oh Christ it's Radio ILE but then realised it was Moyles. ACTUALLY. He was also objecting to Anoushka's 'droopy boobs' and every time he mentioned her name he played Baboushka. oh dear.

― Emma, Tuesday, 3 June 2003 08:41 (twenty-two years ago)

every time he mentioned her name throughout the entire programme?

― mark s (mark s), Tuesday, 3 June 2003 08:44 (twenty-two years ago)

That'd be a great improvement

― RickyT (RickyT), Tuesday, 3 June 2003 08:46 (twenty-two years ago)

OK yeah Jon must go.

But the toaster idea would work mark - Jon's problem is that by the time he has buttered the first slice the second is too cold for the butter to melt nicely into the toast. He is happy to put up with eating the toast cold as long as he gets the the 20 secs extra it takes to butter the first slice.

― N. (nickdastoor), Tuesday, 3 June 2003 08:48 (twenty-two years ago)

speaking of programmes watched that we "weren't watching oh no", rickyt did you see the badgersex on bill oddie on sunday?

(it wz being broadcast in the pub for ~~edgy style lab~~ unknown reasons)

― mark s (mark s), Tuesday, 3 June 2003 08:49 (twenty-two years ago)

One thing I don't understand though. How can ppl say Jon is boring to watch, when they talk about him so much. Who has had anything to say at all about Justine for example? Yet where is the chorus for her to go? Maybe women are allowed to be more boring.

― N. (nickdastoor), Tuesday, 3 June 2003 08:50 (twenty-two years ago)

I was only on the treadmill for 35 mins! And being a BB fan I was keen to listen to BB opinion and gossip. Anyway at least I don't agree with him.

― Emma, Tuesday, 3 June 2003 08:51 (twenty-two years ago)

he's not boring, he's desperately annoying.

Justine chose to have that nose, words fail me.

― chris (chris), Tuesday, 3 June 2003 08:52 (twenty-two years ago)

yes but i don't listen to him for 35 mins non-stop AND i don't agree with him so i win

― mark s (mark s), Tuesday, 3 June 2003 08:53 (twenty-two years ago)

Yeah well it was way less than 35 mins, more like 3-4 mins. I also watched Xtina singing Fighter on MTV and the beginning of Neighbours and listened to Kiss SO THERE.

― Emma, Tuesday, 3 June 2003 08:55 (twenty-two years ago)

= you were there for skunk anansie

― mark s (mark s), Tuesday, 3 June 2003 08:58 (twenty-two years ago)

I didn't see it last night (except for some late night 'gosh that Jon's on another planet, Federico's a player, Scott's hard to get to know, Gos and Cameron are diamond geezer talk between Justine and Steph on the live feed) so I don't know about the awful display Jon put on to turn Chris's opinion around. But the Moyles thing is enough.

― N. (nickdastoor), Tuesday, 3 June 2003 09:00 (twenty-two years ago)

If that's Jon's problem, all he has to do is pull both bits of toast out of the toaster at the same time, stack them up on the plate, put butter on the top one, swap them over immediately, put butter on the new top one. Then reswap and spread the butter on the original top one, swap again and spread the butter on the other one. This ensures lovely melty butteriness every time.

― RickyT (RickyT), Tuesday, 3 June 2003 09:06 (twenty-two years ago)

You get condensation problems (= wet toast = worst case) and butter on the back of one of the pieces. THINK ABOUT IT

― Alan (Alan), Tuesday, 3 June 2003 09:08 (twenty-two years ago)

if he isn't worried abt eating the toast why wd he worry abt condensation?

― mark s (mark s), Tuesday, 3 June 2003 09:10 (twenty-two years ago)

You get wet toast = yr toaster is fucked. Nothing wrong with a bit of butter on the back either.

― RickyT (RickyT), Tuesday, 3 June 2003 09:10 (twenty-two years ago)

what kind of a lah-di-da-mr-frenchman toaster do you have rickyt? in ordinary toasters, the non-outside of the bread is heated and gives off steam, esp. in enclosed spaces (eg residing under another slice of toast)

― mark s (mark s), Tuesday, 3 June 2003 09:13 (twenty-two years ago)

I can't see Jon not winning at the moment. Last Friday, certain bookies were offering 66/1 on him winning. He's as low as 8/1 now. Odd shortenings of that are pretty much unheard of in such a short space of time.

― Dom Passantino (Dom Passantino), Tuesday, 3 June 2003 09:13 (twenty-two years ago)

How much butter do you PUT on your toast RickyT?

Anyway some toasters have a 'keep warm' feature now. Or you can grill yr toast and just keep the second slice under a slightly less hot bit while you butter the first. Or butter them both simultaneously with both hands - this is surely possible with practice.

Steam problem/soggy toast - this is what TOAST RACKS are for, however you have CHOOSE between melty buttery niceness and crispy niceness.

― Archel (Archel), Tuesday, 3 June 2003 09:15 (twenty-two years ago)

who was earliest hated in BB1/2? (jade i remember: her turnaround was certainly slower than jon's)

― mark s (mark s), Tuesday, 3 June 2003 09:15 (twenty-two years ago)

has french toast EVER been hot (in the history of toast)?

― mark s (mark s), Tuesday, 3 June 2003 09:16 (twenty-two years ago)

Nick for BB 1 (obviously), but that took a few weeks to come to fruition.

Probably Amma for BB2? No one ended up liking her, though.

― Dom Passantino (Dom Passantino), Tuesday, 3 June 2003 09:18 (twenty-two years ago)

Jon is not going to win.

― N. (nickdastoor), Tuesday, 3 June 2003 09:20 (twenty-two years ago)

I am aware of the steam problem, but I've never experienced the problem of yer actual wet toast using the method outlined above.

I don't use *that* much butter either, it just comes straight from the fridge and therefore needs a bit of heat to make it spread.

― RickyT (RickyT), Tuesday, 3 June 2003 09:20 (twenty-two years ago)

hold on, the elements in yr toaster don't cool down immediately, hence, you leave the other one in staying warm while you butter the first, this isn't rocket science people.

This method is also recommended by Delia Smith, in that you pop the toaster up and then leave the toast for a minute, this allows the steam to evaporate and hence - dry toast. It works I tells ya.

― chris (chris), Tuesday, 3 June 2003 09:23 (twenty-two years ago)

jon's next time-delayed email to the world will solve that!! liquid butter taps!!

― mark s (mark s), Tuesday, 3 June 2003 09:24 (twenty-two years ago)

Perhaps the fact that I like cold toast is at the root of my desire to see Jon go.

― Emma, Tuesday, 3 June 2003 09:28 (twenty-two years ago)

Dom - I don't recall Amma being that unpopular. Stuart was easily the most disliked in BB2.

― Ben Mott (Ben Mott), Tuesday, 3 June 2003 09:28 (twenty-two years ago)

is it good or bad that i can't remember who any of these ancient BB ppl are?

― mark s (mark s), Tuesday, 3 June 2003 09:33 (twenty-two years ago)

It is bad you reality TV dilettante.

― N. (nickdastoor), Tuesday, 3 June 2003 09:36 (twenty-two years ago)

I WATCHED THEM ALL AS MUCH AS YOU BUT NOW THEY ARE FLED LIKE THE SNOWS OF DOWNTOWN!!

*snuffle*

― mark s (mark s), Tuesday, 3 June 2003 09:41 (twenty-two years ago)

I heart this thread.

― Andrew Farrell (afarrell), Tuesday, 3 June 2003 09:46 (twenty-two years ago)

(while still hating Big Brother)

― Andrew Farrell (afarrell), Tuesday, 3 June 2003 09:46 (twenty-two years ago)

i don't know what this toaster idea was but by christ lots of ppl here seem just as interested in discussing it so... er.. that proves...er..

ok jon wld probably become insufferable in anything other than tv-edit doses
but mr poopy seems like a standard socialised closet psychopath
- it is very easy to picture him routinely cutting ppl up while driving, shouting over others already in front of him at a bar, deciding to persistently 'chat up' someone then turning pseudojokey-nasty if they weren't interested

(cf: spencer in bb3 - who was more laconic but could be quite serial-killer creepy at times)

― Snowy Mann (rdmanston), Tuesday, 3 June 2003 09:49 (twenty-two years ago)

''I heart this thread.

(while still hating Big Brother)''

same here.

― Julio Desouza (jdesouza), Tuesday, 3 June 2003 10:26 (twenty-two years ago)

This thread is hilarious. I never realized the subtle nuances and intricacies of toast til now.

― Nicole (Nicole), Tuesday, 3 June 2003 11:28 (twenty-two years ago)

scott down to the last 2 or 3 at l,east i reckon.

― piscesboy, Tuesday, 3 June 2003 11:32 (twenty-two years ago)

scott totally reminds me of someone who either i wz v.close friends with long ago (= i had a crush on) OR was famous on TV in my youth (= had a crush on me)

― mark s (mark s), Tuesday, 3 June 2003 11:41 (twenty-two years ago)

See also: Taking Sides: Toast vs Bread

― Archel (Archel), Tuesday, 3 June 2003 12:11 (twenty-two years ago)

scott = Damon from brookie

― james (james), Tuesday, 3 June 2003 12:15 (twenty-two years ago)

crossed with Will Young and Robbie Williams and Terry Christian and Graham Norton and Kelly Jones. He is the everyman.

― N. (nickdastoor), Tuesday, 3 June 2003 12:29 (twenty-two years ago)

James- I think I already did the Scott = Simon O'Brien thing on a different thread (see, I'm too young to remember him being in Brookside, but I do remember Standing Room Only).

― Dom Passantino (Dom Passantino), Tuesday, 3 June 2003 12:34 (twenty-two years ago)

Graham Norton?

― Alan (Alan), Tuesday, 3 June 2003 12:44 (twenty-two years ago)

sorry Dom. It is uncanny tho isn't it

― james (james), Tuesday, 3 June 2003 12:47 (twenty-two years ago)

Scarily so. What is Mr O'Brien up to nowadays, anyway?

― Dom Passantino (Dom Passantino), Tuesday, 3 June 2003 13:03 (twenty-two years ago)

He's got something of the Graham Norton about him. Look at his mouth in profile.

― N. (nickdastoor), Tuesday, 3 June 2003 13:08 (twenty-two years ago)

Are you sure you aren't getting confused what with Graham Norton's show being on right after BB?

― Emma, Tuesday, 3 June 2003 13:25 (twenty-two years ago)

Desmond Morris is rubbish at this BB watching/lookeylikey lark (shock) http://www.channel4.com/bigbrother/news/newsstory.jsp?id=1502

― Alan (Alan), Tuesday, 3 June 2003 13:32 (twenty-two years ago)

What is "diamond geezer" talk? A friend of mine has this as his email address, but spelt "geezir".

― Tracer Hand (tracerhand), Tuesday, 3 June 2003 15:16 (twenty-two years ago)

This thread is hilarious. I never realized the subtle nuances and intricacies of toast til now.

Yeah, same here. Clearly this show is the greatest thing ever if it produces threads like these.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Tuesday, 3 June 2003 15:28 (twenty-two years ago)

the whole toaster idea is nonsense as toast with butter tastes best about 2 minutes AFTER it leaves the toaster as any fule kno

― zebedee (zebedee), Tuesday, 3 June 2003 16:38 (twenty-two years ago)

sissy space (sic) will win btw. the others will be too frightened to nominate her for ph34r she will throw kitchen knives at them BY TELEKENESIS and then burn the house down

― zebedee (zebedee), Tuesday, 3 June 2003 16:42 (twenty-two years ago)

oh god oh god. I wanted federico out this week. or Trania - I totally need for her to leave. I love jon for his complete lack of self-awareness and justine is just getting the bitchiness rolling

― j0e (j0e), Tuesday, 3 June 2003 20:11 (twenty-two years ago)

Trania! Well, eviction is decided, it's Jon for being boring and Justine for being a lazy pig. Tania is actually a lo-rent version of Ed's little sister (who won a boy-related throwdown with Waffa bin L@den, O's niece, so don't mess with this girl...).

― suzy (suzy), Tuesday, 3 June 2003 20:21 (twenty-two years ago)

Justine is soooooo gone. I mean, Tickle's been on form recently. "Didn't put that on the form, did I? Consumate liar..."

― Dom Passantino (Dom Passantino), Tuesday, 3 June 2003 20:34 (twenty-two years ago)

Graham Norton is bigging up Jon. I dunno who'll stay actually - I think there are just as many jon-hataz as there are lovers. it'll be a fight between the two as nobody cares about jus either way

as for Trania she'll only last as long as her make-up but she wears just SO MUCH of it - I'm surprised her luxury item wasn't a cement mixer

― j0e (j0e), Tuesday, 3 June 2003 20:37 (twenty-two years ago)

As we have previously discussed, Graham Norton is ALL POWERFUL when it comes to BB. Although The Sun has now come out for Jon, which means that judging on previous form is practically guaranteed to be evicted this weekend.

― Matt DC (Matt DC), Wednesday, 4 June 2003 09:24 (twenty-two years ago)

"Didn't put that on the form, did I? Consumate liar..."
It was the matey thumbs up that had me giggling. It was a sort of nerdy Rick Mayall "right kids?" thing.

― Alan (Alan), Wednesday, 4 June 2003 09:28 (twenty-two years ago)

After watching last nights edition, I have decided that JON MUST GO. That vile bit where they were discussing the snack situation tipped the balance for me.

― RickyT (RickyT), Wednesday, 4 June 2003 09:30 (twenty-two years ago)

The Sun's pro Jon slogan = Don't show the bore the door.

Jon is TRAINED to deal with snack related disputes RickyT, he does it 37 hours a week (exactly).

― Emma, Wednesday, 4 June 2003 09:47 (twenty-two years ago)

It was the way he said he'd plan for the house meeting that made me realise.

― RickyT (RickyT), Wednesday, 4 June 2003 09:53 (twenty-two years ago)

Oh god, he called a house meeting. He is turning into Rik Mayall!

― RickyT (RickyT), Wednesday, 4 June 2003 10:03 (twenty-two years ago)

They did stitch Jon up a touch by running his "I know how to handle conflict" speech immediately after Justine's impression of him.

Jon is coming across as a FULE and he is clearly irritating the other housemates. He is providing the majority of the entertainment at the moment (cf: lengthy toaster discussion in the pub last night).

― Tim (Tim), Wednesday, 4 June 2003 10:06 (twenty-two years ago)

The best thing about Jon is that he's a completely different style of housemate to what's gone before, and a different approach to winning it. When he stays in this weekend (and, face it, he will), the look on the rest of the housemates' faces, who've thought that wackiness and/or chest flashing are the way to win (and, Jeez, Anoushka's eviction face was a picture) will be worth a thousand words.

― Dom Passantino (Dom Passantino), Wednesday, 4 June 2003 10:29 (twenty-two years ago)

that's *exactly* what tim was saying last night Dom.

― CarsmileSteve (CarsmileSteve), Wednesday, 4 June 2003 10:47 (twenty-two years ago)

i'd still like jon to stay, altho' i had the same reaction as ricky t to the house meeting discussion

but i think he will go, notwithstanding that everyone at c4, not just GN, seems to be campaigning for him to stay (they know that with both he and anoushka gone, BB will become a huge snorefest). problem is, ppl see jon and recognise a lot of themselves in him - i do anyway - only a much louder version obv. they don't like that, dub it "boring" to ease their consciences, and want him out

― zebedee (zebedee), Wednesday, 4 June 2003 10:47 (twenty-two years ago)

also he has not LOST IT BIGTIME yet: surely i am not alone in wanting to view that?

i very much need to watch how he deals with this housemeeting, given that he's paid a "shit-load of money" to tackle such negotiation => (important evidence possibly in the 'why "fat cats" are overpaid' debate?)

― mark s (mark s), Wednesday, 4 June 2003 10:50 (twenty-two years ago)

Carsmile Steve I said nothing of the sort you are clearly confusing me with someone else you sot.

― Tim (Tim), Wednesday, 4 June 2003 10:55 (twenty-two years ago)

Mr Sinkah has a good point. He is very likely to go utterly mental eventually and this will be v.entertaining. But I was not coping at all well with his even being on telly last night. I dread to think what level of skincrawling horror we will have to put up with before he finally flips.

― RickyT (RickyT), Wednesday, 4 June 2003 11:04 (twenty-two years ago)

I feel sorry for the others, it's one thing to just have to see this idiot on TV for half an hour every night but to have to live with him 24 hours a day with NO ESCAPE = argggh. While I agree that rogue housemates liven up the action, I think that leaving Jon in there is a step too far in the field of human experimentation.

― Emma, Wednesday, 4 June 2003 11:07 (twenty-two years ago)

Reason for skin crawling horror = what zebedee said, sorta. I really do fear that I might come across like that sometimes..

― RickyT (RickyT), Wednesday, 4 June 2003 11:09 (twenty-two years ago)

remember 'the paul factor'.
despite 5 weeks of solid nominations in bb 2
he was voted to stay *in* 5 times in a row,
went from vilain to champion and got the girl !!

i think big bro's virtually impossible to predict.
who in their right mind would have bet on paul at
the start ?

― piscesboy, Wednesday, 4 June 2003 11:16 (twenty-two years ago)

B-but Brian won. (and Helen was second).

― N. (nickdastoor), Wednesday, 4 June 2003 11:56 (twenty-two years ago)

And Dean was third, and Helen was forth. So there was no actual way of winning on a bet placed on Paul.

― Dom Passantino (Dom Passantino), Wednesday, 4 June 2003 12:02 (twenty-two years ago)

yeah i know he didn't *win* and i meant placed a bet figuratively.

dye ge me ?

― pisceswboy, Wednesday, 4 June 2003 12:23 (twenty-two years ago)

unless of course you were betting each friday on whether he'd stay or go, in which case you would have won five bets (and probably lost it all the following week when he did get kicked out).

Tim, you did say the thing about him being a completely different kind of housemate. you also said (and i have witnesses to back this up) "imagine if it was all of us in there, wouldn't it be great" (possible slight paraphrase)

― CarsmileSteve (CarsmileSteve), Wednesday, 4 June 2003 14:32 (twenty-two years ago)

cor blimey "slight paraphrase"

― Tim (Tim), Wednesday, 4 June 2003 14:33 (twenty-two years ago)

Justine must go!

― jel -- (jel), Wednesday, 4 June 2003 14:52 (twenty-two years ago)

thanks to z and rickyt for saying it first. with "monsters" like David Brent you don't identify *with* him, you identify him with annoying people you've met. Jon has that paranoia/insecurity inducing element of recognising your worst traits. well for me and, I'm guessing, other geeky types. Not that I'm ever going to suggest team-building exercises -- tho god knows how i'd react in BB house.

If only he had the catchphrase "I think you'll find..."

― Alan (Alan), Wednesday, 4 June 2003 14:58 (twenty-two years ago)

Mine is "But surely..."

― Andrew Farrell (afarrell), Wednesday, 4 June 2003 15:00 (twenty-two years ago)

I would totally be an outsider like Jon. But, I think I would have tried to escape by now.

― jel -- (jel), Wednesday, 4 June 2003 15:05 (twenty-two years ago)

i think jon might escape

but not over the roof: i think he has programmed a high-tech mole-style mechanical burrower to arrive through the floor in the middle of week five

― mark s (mark s), Wednesday, 4 June 2003 15:16 (twenty-two years ago)

You realise that it will probably end up burrowing through the swimming pool. Poor Ray and Fed will be washed away! Jon: "Hmmm, my calculations were a bit off, this will not do"

Nush is going to be offered a job as a presenter of a yoga series on Playboy TV.

― jel -- (jel), Wednesday, 4 June 2003 15:22 (twenty-two years ago)

oh and John Claude Van Damme is going to be in French BB house for a week! He's been told to flirt with the girls and cause arguements with the boys.

― jel -- (jel), Wednesday, 4 June 2003 15:24 (twenty-two years ago)

He'd be better off trying the opposite approach.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Wednesday, 4 June 2003 15:33 (twenty-two years ago)

judging by the uk bb, he'd be better off designing a radical new kind of toaster

― mark s (mark s), Wednesday, 4 June 2003 15:38 (twenty-two years ago)

Ned, it sounds like you speak from bitter experience of French BB?

― Tim (Tim), Wednesday, 4 June 2003 15:48 (twenty-two years ago)

? No, I just thought it would be bemusing.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Wednesday, 4 June 2003 15:51 (twenty-two years ago)

Ah! And there I was thinking you'd been parachuted into a French BB to shake things up a bit. You have to admit, it's a plan.

― Tim (Tim), Wednesday, 4 June 2003 16:39 (twenty-two years ago)

Why not parachute Ned into the British BB??

― jel -- (jel), Wednesday, 4 June 2003 17:23 (twenty-two years ago)

I would end up talking Tolkien with Jon and we would bore everyone else to death in two hours.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Wednesday, 4 June 2003 17:25 (twenty-two years ago)

Whoops! They've failed the taskAGAIN. And it was Fed's fault! Their shopping budget for 10 people next week is £36. Ha, ha, ha.

― j0e (j0e), Wednesday, 4 June 2003 20:27 (twenty-two years ago)

No fags or meat then by the looks of things. Hopefully they'll turn to cannibalism like in Alive

― j0e (j0e), Wednesday, 4 June 2003 20:34 (twenty-two years ago)

He is a plant, surely.

― Eyeball Kicks (Eyeball Kicks), Wednesday, 4 June 2003 20:46 (twenty-two years ago)

I assume you meant to put "plank".

― j0e (j0e), Wednesday, 4 June 2003 20:52 (twenty-two years ago)

He is a plant, surely.

I thought the word was "fruit".

(copyright "Clue", about 1987)

― Dom Passantino (Dom Passantino), Wednesday, 4 June 2003 21:33 (twenty-two years ago)

BIGGEST BIG BROTHER NEWS STORY EVER:

http://www.bigbrother.digitalspy.co.uk/article/ds3987.html

― Dom Passantino (Dom Passantino), Wednesday, 4 June 2003 22:01 (twenty-two years ago)

But what time did everyone else go to bed? We need more info!

How are they to survive on just 50p a day each? "Oh no! This chicken has accidentally fallen into the oven! Oh no!"

― Martin Skidmore (Martin Skidmore), Thursday, 5 June 2003 11:37 (twenty-two years ago)

Wot do they give them veggies and chickens FOR? Can't they just eat eggs and runner beans for a week?

(Seem to recall ill-fated plan to kill a chicken in BB3...)

― Archel (Archel), Thursday, 5 June 2003 11:47 (twenty-two years ago)

Diet of eggs & runner beans for a week = stinkiest house evah. Delicate housemates like Nush might not make it.

― Emma, Thursday, 5 June 2003 12:02 (twenty-two years ago)

and of course a sunday lunch of roast goldfish. num num

― Alan (Alan), Thursday, 5 June 2003 12:07 (twenty-two years ago)

re fed being a plant, in the last belgian BB, they actually did have one - a collaborater (sp?) the programme called him - and he ended up winning the whole thing IIRC

― zebedee (zebedee), Thursday, 5 June 2003 13:10 (twenty-two years ago)

Herge to thread (allegedly)

― Richard Jones (scarne), Thursday, 5 June 2003 13:43 (twenty-two years ago)

It's a good job that Jon has been watering and weeding the vegetable patch!

― jel -- (jel), Thursday, 5 June 2003 16:07 (twenty-two years ago)

Justine has an internet boyfriend! (though he didn't seem to think he was a boyfriend when interviewed).

― N. (nickdastoor), Thursday, 5 June 2003 16:54 (twenty-two years ago)

Is he an interweb mentalist?

― caitlin (caitlin), Thursday, 5 June 2003 16:57 (twenty-two years ago)

He's probably one of those sleazy ilxors trolling for women on friendster.

― Nicole (Nicole), Thursday, 5 June 2003 16:58 (twenty-two years ago)

Suddenly I understand trolls. Chicks dig that shit?

― N. (nickdastoor), Thursday, 5 June 2003 16:59 (twenty-two years ago)

It wasn't me, Nicole!

― Martin Skidmore (Martin Skidmore), Thursday, 5 June 2003 19:00 (twenty-two years ago)

Did you see the footage of him dreaming?! That was scarey!

I actually felt sorry for him when the penny dropped, but he lost it when he didn't tell them himself. They've all figured it out anyway.

― Vicky (Vicky), Friday, 6 June 2003 07:15 (twenty-two years ago)

Sitting watching him squirm then enter the long dark night of the soul was terrific. Perhaps the moral pygmy must stay?

― N. (nickdastoor), Friday, 6 June 2003 07:34 (twenty-two years ago)

bah i missed this: spoilers and recaps please!!

― mark s (mark s), Friday, 6 June 2003 08:18 (twenty-two years ago)

For the scout task they were split into 3 groups, the first (incl Jon) had to erect a tent correctly, which they did; the second had to individually tie knots correctly, which they did; the last three people - Steph, Federico & Scott - had to answer a question correctly. Federico got his wrong. oops. BB told them that the reason they failed was that 1 of the questions was answered incorrectly. The other housemates must know it was Fed, he has I AM GUILTY written all over him. oh dear.

― Emma, Friday, 6 June 2003 08:22 (twenty-two years ago)

Federico currently bears all the marks of someone who has just found out he is not as perfect as he thinks he is, and doesn't quite know how to deal with his new-found self-awareness. I'm interested in what will happen if he stays in for a long period of time now..

― Matt DC (Matt DC), Friday, 6 June 2003 08:25 (twenty-two years ago)

(thanx emma: apologies for reality-TV lightweightness and dilettantism on my part everyone)

― mark s (mark s), Friday, 6 June 2003 08:26 (twenty-two years ago)

Justine "admitted" to being in a threesome last night.

― Alan (Alan), Friday, 6 June 2003 08:28 (twenty-two years ago)

Justine desperately trying to play the sex card to stay in. It didn't work for Anoushka, it won't work for him. We want more of Jon Tickle's guide to management and toast. (Well I don't actually but I think we'll get it).

― Pete (Pete), Friday, 6 June 2003 08:33 (twenty-two years ago)

jon's swift populist counter will be to "admit" that he tabulates the results of robot wars on a huge chart in his bedroom, in multicoloured pen

― mark s (mark s), Friday, 6 June 2003 08:36 (twenty-two years ago)

yeah, probably an internet one though. Fed's face as he went to bed was a picture of despair, poor fella.

Jon should go, but unfortunately he'll end up releasing wacky management books, to be read by David Brents all over the country who see him as their role model.

― chris (chris), Friday, 6 June 2003 08:37 (twenty-two years ago)

was the threesome an all-male threesome? i seem to have have missed an awful lot

― mark s (mark s), Friday, 6 June 2003 08:38 (twenty-two years ago)

Is Ptee implying that Trania isn't the only gender-bender in the house?

Matt DC is OTM re:Fed.

The best was how he knew he'd got it wrong as soon as someone checked with him that he had recited the Scouts' Promise and not the Scouts' Law but went through the motions of saying 'Yeah, I got it right word for word'.

― N. (nickdastoor), Friday, 6 June 2003 08:38 (twenty-two years ago)

Ah Matt, we all remember that feeling. For me it was when I was seven and the two teams picking up for a game of football deliberately rtried to lose so they would not have to pick last - which would be me. The teams were happy to play a man down than have a liability in their team. So Fed - I feel your pain.

I was going to say that it might not have been a threesome Justine had, maybe she just drew some faces on her tits - but decided that would be cruel.

― Pete (Pete), Friday, 6 June 2003 08:44 (twenty-two years ago)

When the light catches properly, Nush is so pretty.

― Cozen (Cozen), Friday, 6 June 2003 10:22 (twenty-two years ago)

I like Nush more and more. She was very funny with her nominations the other night. Possibly the first witty person in the house since Brian.

― N. (nickdastoor), Friday, 6 June 2003 10:31 (twenty-two years ago)

very much so, and watching her eat last night when she was sneaking leftovers was very funny.

also Princess Leia

― chris (chris), Friday, 6 June 2003 10:36 (twenty-two years ago)

I have a feeling that the women of Britain will turn against Nush quite soon. Just as the men folk have turned against attractive but dim Fed.

― Pete (Pete), Friday, 6 June 2003 10:44 (twenty-two years ago)

'Dim'?

― Cozen (Cozen), Friday, 6 June 2003 10:45 (twenty-two years ago)

poor fed, I'm warming to the loveable f*ck-up

― chris (chris), Friday, 6 June 2003 10:45 (twenty-two years ago)

All right then 'illiterate'.

― N. (nickdastoor), Friday, 6 June 2003 10:46 (twenty-two years ago)

Elaborating on what I said upthread, Fed becomes interesting because we get to see the veneer of arrogance being chipped away. I'm looking forward to next week's task when he becomes terrified of fucking up for the third week on the trot, which will happen and is quite a departure from his "nope, I've memorised everyone's names already" on the first night.

I have a feeling Nush will end up winning the thing.

― Matt DC (Matt DC), Friday, 6 June 2003 10:49 (twenty-two years ago)

I can see myself having a rollercoaster journey with Nush. At first I despised the vapid, scrawny hippy. Now I have quite warmed to her. no doubt I will go off her again pretty quickly.

Pete the men folk can't turn against Fed cos they had never turned towards him in the first place, the hataz. I still love him though.

― Emma, Friday, 6 June 2003 11:15 (twenty-two years ago)

Point taken. What is the current betting N. - being the Statto of our Big Brother threads.

― Pete (Pete), Friday, 6 June 2003 11:44 (twenty-two years ago)

Ladbrokes:

Scott 3/1
Nush 4/1
Ray 5/1
Cameron 7/1
Gos 8/1
Jon 10/1
Steph 12/1
Federico 16/1
Tania 16/1
Sissy 25/1
Justine 33/1
Any other contestant 20/1

― N. (nickdastoor), Friday, 6 June 2003 11:53 (twenty-two years ago)

Whither Sissy's long odds? What have I missed there. Is she a hidden ginger?

Ray seems ludicrously overpriced. Laddies seem to think its a one girl race when it comes to the ladies. Scott as favourite seems to be relying tooo much on his Simon O'Brien looks. But remember what happened to him in Damon & Debbie.

― Pete (Pete), Friday, 6 June 2003 12:08 (twenty-two years ago)

I find myself wondering which ones Scott and Ray are, and feel shocked they are in the top three favourites. I really like Nush, only partly because she is so beautiful.

― Martin Skidmore (Martin Skidmore), Friday, 6 June 2003 12:11 (twenty-two years ago)

Sissy's got long odds because she is ANNOYING AS FUCK and will be evicted whichever week she is first nominated. I think Ray blew it by going mental last night.

― Matt DC (Matt DC), Friday, 6 June 2003 12:11 (twenty-two years ago)

Sissy is the outsider cause the public seem to hate her yeah. Anto red-head and anti-Liverpool bigotry in there somewhere I assume.

― N. (nickdastoor), Friday, 6 June 2003 12:13 (twenty-two years ago)

I don't like Scott or Ray. Scott just looks a bit twattish.

In fact, the only men I don't mind that much are Gos and Cameron, because they're too bland to be offensive. I did like Jon, but I've decided he's just too grating.

(it was a shame that Jon's conversation about religion last night didn't break down into a big Jon v. Cameron FITE! though)

― caitlin (caitlin), Friday, 6 June 2003 12:15 (twenty-two years ago)

when sissy is evicted she will gaze balefully at exits, shutting them by willpower alone, then telepathically set the big brother house ablaze and crucify davina with steak-knives: drenched in cub's blood from head to foot, she will nevertheless glow with witchy beauty and wiccan rage rowr oh yes rowr NOW you see how you mocked her at her peril

jon, alone and safe far underground in his subterranean mole-mobile, will smirk to himself: three more weeks of time-delayed emails to go and so far all has worked perfectly

― mark s (mark s), Friday, 6 June 2003 12:22 (twenty-two years ago)

I found myself agreeing with Jon on religion last night, then felt bad and had a shower. Cameron is a tosser (and a salt-hider) he will soon be the one to explode and it'll be hilarious, and also people will realise that he is really welsh!!

Ray is ok by me, his explosion last night was perfectly understandable, I'd have done the same.

― chris (chris), Friday, 6 June 2003 12:27 (twenty-two years ago)

Ray's outburst was fairly reasonable given that everyone seemed confident that they'd answered their questions correctly; he seemed to think that BB were being deliberately picky and pedantic in order to make more interesting telly.

― caitlin (caitlin), Friday, 6 June 2003 12:32 (twenty-two years ago)

Yeah, but he was wrong.

I liked Scott from the moment I saw his tape. He will shine when there are fewer people. I thought tosser Ray was going to lose it even more when they others just sat on the sofa and said 'What's the point in getting stressed?' and 'It's funny, I just don't get stressed'.

― N. (nickdastoor), Friday, 6 June 2003 12:36 (twenty-two years ago)

that's until he went in to see what happened, of course we're talking about last night when we mean Wednesday night. It's a bit odd watching the live feed and then going back in time on the actual programme to see what happened in the diary room the day before.

and Cameron is still a twat

and the text messages at the bottom of the live feed make me weep for our futures

― chris (chris), Friday, 6 June 2003 12:39 (twenty-two years ago)

Sissy iz God and ur all gay. Camron will lik Jon's balls before wknd.

― Pete (Pete), Friday, 6 June 2003 12:42 (twenty-two years ago)

Fed's old man steptoe gurning and sneering in his sleep was pretty worrying.

― Nathan W (Nathan Webb), Friday, 6 June 2003 12:48 (twenty-two years ago)

Jon has broken house rules by advertising a drinks company on his t-shirt and may be chucked out? Surely not such an ignominious exit for one so great. Confirm or deny?

― Archel (Archel), Friday, 6 June 2003 14:31 (twenty-two years ago)

The Daily Star today seemed to be saying he was going to be evicted because of it; but they've been against him constantly so far. They were also claiming the credit for alerting the producers to his t-shirts.

(I do not read the Daily Star, but I glance at the front page when getting my lunch)

(classic Star sub-headline last week: "BB4 contestants have been begging Daily Star readers to vote Jon out of the house." Um, yes.)

Surely it's more likely that they'll give him a warning and different clothes to wear? Which contestant was it who had their wardrobe rejected by BB the day before it started, because they had too many designer labels or something?

― caitlin (caitlin), Friday, 6 June 2003 14:37 (twenty-two years ago)

(ahem, i did that joke already mark)

― zebedee (zebedee), Friday, 6 June 2003 15:25 (twenty-two years ago)

I don't like Cameron

― jel -- (jel), Friday, 6 June 2003 16:03 (twenty-two years ago)

Caitlin - it was Gos whose designer wardrobe was confiscated.

Shouldn't this thread be renamed JUSTINE MUST GO?

― Ben Mott (Ben Mott), Friday, 6 June 2003 17:19 (twenty-two years ago)

Bye bye Justine!

"What is going on?" They're evicting fucking morons, Sissy, and you're next.

― Dom Passantino (Dom Passantino), Friday, 6 June 2003 19:01 (twenty-two years ago)

I mean, my god, what manner of fucking insensitive fuckdog is Sissy? "She didn't want to go"? And Jon did, did he? And so far, she's blamed football and a conspiracy for Justine being evicted. It wouldn't have anything to do with her having negative personality now, would it? All in front of Jon's face as well, ignoring him... get the girl the fuck out of the house now, please.

― Dom Passantino (Dom Passantino), Friday, 6 June 2003 19:09 (twenty-two years ago)

I love Sissy. I repeat: her teeth turn me on.

― Eyeball Kicks (Eyeball Kicks), Friday, 6 June 2003 23:59 (twenty-two years ago)

all my ideas ever i copied off someone else :(

― mark s (mark s), Saturday, 7 June 2003 09:26 (twenty-two years ago)

Cameron = train (well, car) spotter

― ailsa (ailsa), Saturday, 7 June 2003 11:09 (twenty-two years ago)

i cant wprl put if jon's strategy re the food-consumption divide is terrible or genius

― mark s (mark s), Sunday, 8 June 2003 19:49 (twenty-two years ago)

wprl put = work out! sorry

anyway he deals with the the whole thing as a boys vs girls deal, which is INCREDIBLY DIVISIVE AND DUMB

*but* tho the girls are now angry the boys are discussing it, they are leaning over backwards to let JON off the hook as bearer of bad news (at least *he* told them)

so he simultaenously divides the genders but (a little bit) ingratiates himself

― dr peter collett s (mark s), Sunday, 8 June 2003 19:51 (twenty-two years ago)

''ingratiates''?! isn't that a big word for TV?

― Julio Desouza (jdesouza), Sunday, 8 June 2003 19:54 (twenty-two years ago)

that's a really stupid game they are playing.

― Julio Desouza (jdesouza), Sunday, 8 June 2003 19:56 (twenty-two years ago)

I was at a party last night and happened to meet two of Jon's friends, who have known him since they were at Uni together. They said that everyone really likes him IRL but they tend to spend a lot of time telling him to shut up.

― C J (C J), Sunday, 8 June 2003 20:11 (twenty-two years ago)

jon is the focus of the gender divide obv:

i. cz the way justine treated him wz a bit stinky (and did for her in the vote i suspect)
ii. the guy-dudes bonded round the intra-guydude announcement (in the pool, a symbolic bath-house/gay sauna) that jon was a "top chap" and "very extremely funny" => to expel jon wd be to expel the distilled essence of the present-day iconic aspect of what distinguishes lady-dudes from guy-dudes (cf men are from mars, women from venus/men behaving badly etc etc)... bcz they fear this fact of difference to be so (whether or not it is), they have to find a way to ritualise and celebrate it OR plunge fearlessly into the territory of THERE IS NO DIFFERENCE WE ARE ALL DUDES UNDER THE SUN = "ray is gazing at *MY* guydood-boobs w.the same intensity as i am gazing at ________'s arse"

(trans: society as a whole wd collapse into crispless cannibalism and unbridgeable hate w/o the presence of playful gaydudes and lesbdudes to render dumm the ultra-lame main obvious divide on offer)

― mark s (mark s), Monday, 9 June 2003 11:14 (twenty-two years ago)

crikey

― RickyT (RickyT), Monday, 9 June 2003 11:24 (twenty-two years ago)

Actually Jon used a very good technique which was thoroughly seen through and deconstructed to a large degree by Nush. Rather than discussing it with the whole group he discusses it with the most popular woman (Nush) both allowing her not be associated with the bad people in her mind, but whom as an insider then gets to diseminate the information for him. Unfortunately Nush's "Yes you are pissing me off a bit"did the job. However the effectiveness of the technique was shown when Steph mentioned to Big Brother Sissy's profligate crisp habit.

Anyway - nu week - nu thread. SISSY MUST GO.

Jon's technique effectively removes blame for the argument from him, whilst leaving those it is aimed at uncertain to the seriousness of it. In an institution with a proper heirachy of power this kind of sureptitious bullying is nearly always effective.

― Pete (Pete), Monday, 9 June 2003 11:27 (twenty-two years ago)

it's deja vu all over again

― mark s (mark s), Monday, 9 June 2003 11:29 (twenty-two years ago)

It's interesting that this is the first year where the bedrooms weren't designated 'boys' and 'girls', but has seen the most dramatic divide on gender lines. Although I think the whole thing is just coincidence - the women just happened to bond with each other as individuals early on, whereas in previous years alliances were more mixed gender. And then the men bonded inevitably against them, as it's easy once a friendship group of only one gender is formed to generalise about 'the girls are eating too much' etc. And then you get 'the boys only talk about who they want to screw' and 'oh there's a conspiracy to vote out the girls first' [HA HA get OVER it] etc etc. And voila, the dynamic is set up for the rest of the series. Although in fact they will have to break ranks when there are fewer people, and I can't wait. It's hideous at the moment. And Sissy must go.

― Archel (Archel), Monday, 9 June 2003 11:37 (twenty-two years ago)

also the first public male-female bonding was an awful warning that HETEROSEXUALITY IS FLAWED!!

― mark s (mark s), Monday, 9 June 2003 11:39 (twenty-two years ago)

Mark S: I think the swimming pool "jon is a really great guy" session was more like this:

1. we have painted Jon into the outcast corner, he has been the social weakling
2. a greater unknowable force (= voting public / God) has shown Jon to be annointed. our social cues and hierarchy have been snubbed twice
3. Jon is not the weakling any more, he can smite us all
4. we will all be nominated soon, perhaps this week
5. I must not be up against the anointed one he is strong and will smite me
6. that Jon's very, very funny isn't he?

― Tim (Tim), Monday, 9 June 2003 11:47 (twenty-two years ago)

THAT'S THE SAME THING!!

(cf baboons showing rump to dominant silverback) (we are mates so we don't have to mate)

― mark s (mark s), Monday, 9 June 2003 11:55 (twenty-two years ago)

7. Jon is not female, and thus his outsider status is cancelled out in the wider context.

― Archel (Archel), Monday, 9 June 2003 11:55 (twenty-two years ago)

8. Jon likes Tolkien = his outsider status is hurriedly reinstated in the even wider than that context

― mark s (mark s), Monday, 9 June 2003 11:56 (twenty-two years ago)

9. We are compartmentalising men so we are easily able to ignore the fact that he likes Tolkien if it suits us.

― Archel (Archel), Monday, 9 June 2003 11:59 (twenty-two years ago)

Archel: yes but he was clearly being kept at arms length by the other men, which is why the "he's such a funny guy" convo was necessary

Mark s: yes but only in the mark s craziverse where EVERYTHING and EVERYTHING ELSE are the SAME THING!

― Tim (Tim), Monday, 9 June 2003 11:59 (twenty-two years ago)

scenes from "a peak into the craziverse" #87456

mum on phone last night: "mark s, i have a question for you that only a student can answer"
mark s: *unable to frame a reply to this*

― mark s (mark s), Monday, 9 June 2003 12:03 (twenty-two years ago)

clearly mum s meant "a student of human nature university of life school of hard knocks" but has the s gift for ellipsis innit?

― Tim (Tim), Monday, 9 June 2003 12:05 (twenty-two years ago)

Oh I totally agree Tim, but there was definitely closing ranks against the women too - they had to choose either to make the mental shift and absorb Jon, or leave him out and keep him in his own special category. And they will be stronger against the women if they absorb him.

― Archel (Archel), Monday, 9 June 2003 12:07 (twenty-two years ago)

What was the question. I am
a) A student
b) Surrounded by what your mum might class as students (ie undergraduate 18-24 yr olds).

― Pete (Pete), Monday, 9 June 2003 12:15 (twenty-two years ago)

Hmm Archel you're probably right although I have this vague feeling that the strength is an illusion (to what extent can they rely on the voting public continuing to hate women?). I suspect at least half of the men would be happier if the gender divide hadn't happened and could be broken down but they can't risk a shot-by-both-sides scenario. Except Jon who (as noted) is annointed (for now).

Also best BB ever or what?

― Tim (Tim), Monday, 9 June 2003 12:17 (twenty-two years ago)

I think Cameron is going to be the first over the top. Nush or Tania will cry on his shoulder one day and that will be it.

― Archel (Archel), Monday, 9 June 2003 12:20 (twenty-two years ago)

over the top in hamburglaresque or jade-esque style?

i agree with tim's prognostication (though the rationale of his analysis is still afraid of the middle of its body)

― mark s (mark s), Monday, 9 June 2003 12:26 (twenty-two years ago)

Given his bathroom antics (which are OTT in Chris Tarrant style) Cameron might move into the girls' bedroom. That would be tremendous and it's the only thing which would make me want fishboy to stay.

As for TMOMB, fear seems the appropriate reaction.

― Tim (Tim), Monday, 9 June 2003 12:29 (twenty-two years ago)

so apparently in a sunday paper it said jon was a virgin, and also cameron admitted to not having had a relationship for eleven years and as a GOOD CHRISTIAN BOY this means it is possible he is a virgin/hasn't done it for so long it's sealed up...

i'm not sure how this is relevant...

― CarsmileSteve (CarsmileSteve), Monday, 9 June 2003 13:13 (twenty-two years ago)

UR ALL MATELESS!!

― mark s (mark s), Monday, 9 June 2003 13:15 (twenty-two years ago)

By 'sealed up' do you mean Cameron has been unleashing his sexual frustration on seals? First he lures them with the fush he trades then BAM.

― Emma, Monday, 9 June 2003 13:25 (twenty-two years ago)

He has the same preferences as Troy McClure.

― Nicole (Nicole), Monday, 9 June 2003 13:30 (twenty-two years ago)

This thread is suddenly RELEVANT.

Channel 4 seems to think that putting people who have not had sex for a long time increases the chances of them having sex in the house. Ch4 are fules.

― Pete (Pete), Tuesday, 10 June 2003 09:59 (twenty-two years ago)

Just cos they haven't had girlfriends for a million years doesn't mean they have't had sex. As the lady on BBLB on Sunday pointed out. I think C4 are resigned to no shagging on UKBB.

― Emma, Tuesday, 10 June 2003 10:19 (twenty-two years ago)

Looks like the tabloids have also given up speculating on in-house bonkarama as well. Now, if Anoushka had stayed in...

― Matt DC (Matt DC), Tuesday, 10 June 2003 10:21 (twenty-two years ago)

I'm often up around Elstree Studios where the BB house is. The whole area is soul suckingly depressing - a high street of betting shops, bathroom showrooms and curtain wholesalers. You'd think the studios made up for it...... no, they smell of bad, of shit to be precise. Really, go check for yourself.

― nick.K (nick.K), Tuesday, 10 June 2003 11:53 (twenty-two years ago)

Oi. You're talking about my home town there. (And a more depressing shithole you won't see. This is the real reason Eastenders is so depressing, it leaches out from the horrible town what is Borehamwood).

― Pete (Pete), Tuesday, 10 June 2003 12:03 (twenty-two years ago)

Borehamwood..... it says it all. It makes Elstree seem like the European cultural capital (hmm, not exactly what I meant). Most interesting thing that happened in Bhmwood was me being thrown out of a service station last week for taking pictures of their strange modular ceiling tiles.

― nick.K (nick.K), Tuesday, 10 June 2003 12:10 (twenty-two years ago)

Meanwhile - Frederico should stay, for me he's the most interesting thing about the program, and it's much safer that he's in there, rather than out here impressing the girls with his 'warehouse' eyes, out-smarting insects, or whatever his talents are.

― nick.K (nick.K), Tuesday, 10 June 2003 12:17 (twenty-two years ago)

I had never seen BB as a containment exercise, but you are right.

― N. (nickdastoor), Tuesday, 10 June 2003 12:19 (twenty-two years ago)

That said though if your the kind of fella who goes to service stations and take photos of ceiling tiles, boredom is surely no stranger to you.

― Pete (Pete), Tuesday, 10 June 2003 12:25 (twenty-two years ago)

It's Borehamwood's fault!!! I was filling up my car to make a getaway and it occurred to me that those tiles where the most interesting thing around for miles..

― nick.K (nick.K), Tuesday, 10 June 2003 12:30 (twenty-two years ago)

If it's some kind of M25 service station, you're no stranger to DRUCKS either.

― suzy (suzy), Tuesday, 10 June 2003 12:31 (twenty-two years ago)

Meanwhile - Frederico must stay, until long after the cameras have turned off. Perhaps until the new contestants find him next year, it'd make for an interesting challenge?

― nick.K (nick.K), Tuesday, 10 June 2003 12:33 (twenty-two years ago)

"Federico reacted to his nomination by shaking everyone's hands, but could not prevent his mouth opening voluntarily - and staying open. As he stood up, he then sang the La's classic 'There She Goes' under his breath, which can't have helped Sissy's mood one jot."

Har.

Please note the use of the word 'classic' is not mine. The word classic should not really have been placed anywhere near a Fed thread and I'm sorry.

― Tim (Tim), Tuesday, 10 June 2003 13:37 (twenty-two years ago)

how much of it did he sing?

― mark s (mark s), Tuesday, 10 June 2003 13:51 (twenty-two years ago)

I don't know, that came from the C4 BB site. Jon said (quoth?) "the game's afoot" apparently. Sissy... well you already know what Sissy did.

― Tim (Tim), Tuesday, 10 June 2003 14:00 (twenty-two years ago)

There isn't much too sing.

Fed is perking up because he feels confident in the task as he used to be quasimodo in a past life.

― Pete (Pete), Tuesday, 10 June 2003 14:02 (twenty-two years ago)

More from The Wit And Wisdom Of Federico:

"It takes much more effort to boo than it does to cheer."

"If I was watching, I wouldn't vote me off, I'd vote someone else off - but not me. I'm not saying that in an egotistical way, but..."

― Archel (Archel), Tuesday, 10 June 2003 14:43 (twenty-two years ago)

FEDERICO MUST STAY!!!

― chris (chris), Tuesday, 10 June 2003 14:48 (twenty-two years ago)

"It takes much more effort to boo than it does to cheer."

Best rewrite of 'I Know It's Over' ever!

― N. (nickdastoor), Tuesday, 10 June 2003 15:01 (twenty-two years ago)

"It takes much more effort to boo than it does to cheer."

Federico is an ilm poster shockah!

― Nicole (Nicole), Tuesday, 10 June 2003 15:50 (twenty-two years ago)

I thought ILM posters would boo easily nicole.

― Julio Desouza (jdesouza), Tuesday, 10 June 2003 16:32 (twenty-two years ago)

Okay, a certain obtuse subset of ilm posters -- "Why do people criticize music why WHY OH-WHY-EEEE???" that deserve to battered by angry puffins.

― Nicole (Nicole), Tuesday, 10 June 2003 16:37 (twenty-two years ago)

but I'm one of them :-(

― Julio Desouza (jdesouza), Tuesday, 10 June 2003 16:49 (twenty-two years ago)

Fed did actually amuse me tonight. Speaking on the subject of the bell-ringing task in the diary room:

"I think there's more chance of the Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse riding into the house than there is of us passing this task."

― Ben Mott (Ben Mott), Tuesday, 10 June 2003 21:31 (twenty-two years ago)

I thought that was a bit of a clichéd joke formula. But his delivery on the "Last night I didn't think we had a chance of passing. This evening I think we haven't got a hope in hell" was quite good.

― N. (nickdastoor), Tuesday, 10 June 2003 21:46 (twenty-two years ago)

Federico reminds me of a drunk student some times - big words fumbling out of his mouth ("that's the dichotomy of being me").

No-one is a winner in this house.

I'm not sure that this is the best BB ever, yet, maybe more that we're (you're) all getting better at talking about it. (??) (!!)

― Cozen (Cozen), Tuesday, 10 June 2003 21:49 (twenty-two years ago)

I mean, it is the best BB ever, obv.

― Cozen (Cozen), Tuesday, 10 June 2003 21:51 (twenty-two years ago)

JADE MUST GO
I have made a terrible error - JADE MUST STAY
JADE MUST KEEP HER CLOVES ON!
I HATE ALEX.
ALEX IS MY NU-GOD!!

I was going to read all these again and do a comparison but I haven't got it in me.

― N. (nickdastoor), Tuesday, 10 June 2003 21:56 (twenty-two years ago)

They're all too well adapted to ridicule. It's all far too reserved and *whispers it* middle class. Anouska was the only person likely to cause a stir and she was booted out in the first week for being annoying and *whispers again* just a little bit common.

― Lara (Lara), Tuesday, 10 June 2003 21:58 (twenty-two years ago)

I don't understand why you like Scott, N. Do you still like him?

― Cozen (Cozen), Tuesday, 10 June 2003 22:00 (twenty-two years ago)

Yes.

― N. (nickdastoor), Tuesday, 10 June 2003 22:06 (twenty-two years ago)

Scott is ok, nice bloke, seems sensible and doesn't get too wacky either. Plus he told off Ray for the BJ comment.

― chris (chris), Wednesday, 11 June 2003 07:25 (twenty-two years ago)

I'm tipping Scott, Nush, Steph and Gos for the final. If only because I don't think the latter two will get nominated once, Dean and Elizabeth style.

The only one of these I'm even mildly uncertain about is Nush.

― Matt DC (Matt DC), Wednesday, 11 June 2003 07:34 (twenty-two years ago)

Dean got barred from't local indie pub the other week for telling my mate's sister she was 'too fat to serve him'.

― Ferg (Ferg), Wednesday, 11 June 2003 20:33 (twenty-two years ago)

I liked Dean.

― N. (nickdastoor), Wednesday, 11 June 2003 20:38 (twenty-two years ago)

His fame musta snapped him.

― Ferg (Ferg), Wednesday, 11 June 2003 21:21 (twenty-two years ago)

>>> "It takes much more effort to boo than it does to cheer."
Best rewrite of 'I Know It's Over' ever!

Marvellous!

I have seen this character on TV. He looks quite pretty to me. I don't understand why people would want to rid the screen of him. The others are mostly less good to look at.

― the pinefox, Thursday, 12 June 2003 10:25 (twenty-two years ago)

I will back Dean in this occasion if she really actually was too fat to serve the pint (excess bllubber stopping proper arm bending, or inability to manouvere behind the bar).

― Pete (Pete), Thursday, 12 June 2003 10:31 (twenty-two years ago)

Or if she was forced to stand so far from the bar itself she couldn't actually put said pint anywhere near Dean without glass smashage?

I don't think this a realistic hypothesis, unfortunately.

― Matt DC (Matt DC), Thursday, 12 June 2003 10:43 (twenty-two years ago)

Agreed. I think Deanb was probably being a nob.

― Pete (Pete), Thursday, 12 June 2003 10:45 (twenty-two years ago)

Food for though from Fed:

After an evening of indulgence in food and alcohol and a rather jolly sing-song the atmosphere in the house soured.

It started with an innocent comment from Ray saying that he always pays for dinner on a first date. Fed had his own take on this, he declared that women who didn't at least offer to pay their share were dirty slags and that there were a lot of dirty slags out there. Qualifying this he said "shout out for equality, shout out for equal rights but if a woman doesn't want to pay then she's a slag."

A worried Ray suggested to Federico that he shut up before he guaranteed that he was leaving on Friday. Fed did not like being told to shut up and told ray that he (Ray) reminded him of when he was 18 and that he didn't need to play those games any more, he didn't have to pretend to respect women.

Ray then left the table for a while before coming back to remind Fed that there are millions watching, not just those in the house. Fed returns "I don't care if this is on TV. I don't care if I get evicted!" before Scott gets them both to calm down.

― Pete (Pete), Thursday, 12 June 2003 11:06 (twenty-two years ago)

Is this on tonight?!

― Matt DC (Matt DC), Thursday, 12 June 2003 11:09 (twenty-two years ago)

Good news guys! Once you hit 19, you don't have to pretend to respect women any more!

(Was Dean the one with the sort of skull face?)

― Archel (Archel), Thursday, 12 June 2003 11:09 (twenty-two years ago)

"Calm down, calm down!"

― N. (nickdastoor), Thursday, 12 June 2003 11:09 (twenty-two years ago)

Should be yes. Its failing the task and then getting a free if manky Chinese (Borehamwood has some of the worst Chinese restaurants in the UK) - and importantly plenty of beer.

― Pete (Pete), Thursday, 12 June 2003 11:13 (twenty-two years ago)

is emma formulating the case for the defence?

― mark s (mark s), Thursday, 12 June 2003 11:14 (twenty-two years ago)

More likely eating her lunch. That said there is something in what Fed sez - but the dirty slags bit lets himself down a touch.

― Pete (Pete), Thursday, 12 June 2003 11:18 (twenty-two years ago)

they failed the task and then get beer and food - BB is getting soft if that is the case - more chick peas = more fighting

― james (james), Thursday, 12 June 2003 11:19 (twenty-two years ago)

I have finished my lunch so will have a bash. Um OK then. Fed should stay because 1. whatever he says he still looks good and 2. er, coming out with 'controversial' views provokes debate which is interesting to watch. In fact the view that women should offer to pay on dates is not controversial, it's just the 'slag' outburst that is puzzling. hmm..

― Emma, Thursday, 12 June 2003 11:20 (twenty-two years ago)

and the condescending "You remind me of me when I was 18" - fucking NOB. I now think his friends reunited entry was probably meant sincerely.

― Alan (Alan), Thursday, 12 June 2003 11:24 (twenty-two years ago)

And in the great 'BB is getting soft' debate I have to say NO HE/SHE/IT/THEY ISN'T / AREN'T. In previous years they were allowed to make loads of mistakes in tasks and didn't have to bet a minimum 50% on them. More chick peas = more tedium. More booze = more fun.

(shut up Alan you are just jealous)

― Emma, Thursday, 12 June 2003 11:25 (twenty-two years ago)

I agree - Fed must stay for now at least. Psychologically he is slowly falling to pieces which is interesting to watch, The quote suggests he is fed up (dys) with relationship games - which may also suggest he has been on a lot of first dates with no comeback (sexual or financial). That also suggests that he is objectively attractive to ladies but has a rubbidge personality.

Sissy seems to be keeping her head down which might save her, but probably won't.

I don't mind them failing the tasks for a bit, proper bouze crisis later when they pass a piss easy one. But Big Brother has seemed to avoid the big rush'o'birthdays which was previously such a spectacle (though statistically unlikely).

― Pete (Pete), Thursday, 12 June 2003 11:34 (twenty-two years ago)

I am glad that Emma L. Cake agrees with me about the way he looks.

― the pinefox, Thursday, 12 June 2003 11:49 (twenty-two years ago)

I am glad you are glad. Pete, I don't think Fed is the dating type, more the get off with someone in a club and have a one night stand type.

It can't be that statistically unlikely that in a 9-10 week period several people in the group of 12 will have a birthday.

― Emma, Thursday, 12 June 2003 11:50 (twenty-two years ago)

Particularly considering that it's in the information they provide during the selection process.

― Andrew Farrell (afarrell), Thursday, 12 June 2003 11:52 (twenty-two years ago)

Cynicism there. But birthdays = excuse to crack out the bouze = good TV,

Nick will tell us shortly exactly how many Big Brother contestants have had birthdays in the house. I believe the figure is over 50% (I have a vague memory that BB2 had 8 birthdays). Statistically it should average out at just under 20% - 2/3 contestants.

― Pete (Pete), Thursday, 12 June 2003 11:55 (twenty-two years ago)

prob that none of them have a birthday during entirety of that period = (1 - (295/365)^10)

― mark s (mark s), Thursday, 12 June 2003 11:55 (twenty-two years ago)

Birthday celebrations have never been that big of a deal, surely? And certainly not enough to justify selecting people on that basis. BB will take any excuse to chuck a bit of extra booze & food at the housemates, this year's secret disco / bingeing room shows that.

― Emma, Thursday, 12 June 2003 11:58 (twenty-two years ago)

sorry, that's the prob at least one of them has a b/d during that period (if there were 10 to start which there weren't oop)

― mark s (mark s), Thursday, 12 June 2003 12:00 (twenty-two years ago)

The format is constantly being tweaked. The SECRET PUB is a compromise from last years grebt TV Saturday tasks vs back to basics week long tasks which were fun to watch and a challenge.

Birthdays are good because they allow parties, but also much introspection from the person involved (age, their friends and families) good for show.

― Pete (Pete), Thursday, 12 June 2003 12:16 (twenty-two years ago)

Stop calling it a secret pub. The only resemblance it bears to a pub is that it has booze in it.

Maybe the birthdays thing can be explained using astrology. Geminis / Cancerians = more likely to have an urge to appear on reality TV.

― Emma, Thursday, 12 June 2003 12:24 (twenty-two years ago)

WHo was the BB contestant with an identical twin who they stuck pins in trying to see if the twin in the house felt the pain?

B-b-but Emma, what have whizzing pieces of rock in ver Universe got to do with my personality.

― Pete (Pete), Thursday, 12 June 2003 12:27 (twenty-two years ago)

Cynicism there. But birthdays = excuse to crack out the bouze = good TV

Right. So where's the cynicism? The purpose of the selection process is to pick people who will make good TV, and birthdays are a factor. I'm not saying "Capricorns need not apply" or anything.

Was it mostly the boring people in BB2 that had birthdays during the show?

― Andrew Farrell (afarrell), Thursday, 12 June 2003 12:30 (twenty-two years ago)

Stop calling it a secret pub
STOP GETTING BIG BROTHER WRONG

― Alan (Alan), Thursday, 12 June 2003 12:37 (twenty-two years ago)

Mostly the ones that stayed. Oh, but Elizabeth and Dean certainly did (Helen did but she wasn't boring). I have a feeling Brian didn't, and Penny probably didn't have the time. Bubble had a birthday, pretty sure Paul Clark did too. Stuart may have gone too quickly, but Josh and Narindar had one I think.

I think the perception might become Capricorns need not apply".

― Pete (Pete), Thursday, 12 June 2003 12:39 (twenty-two years ago)

couldn't they just all be like the queen and have an official birthday in june?

― CarsmileSteve (CarsmileSteve), Thursday, 12 June 2003 12:40 (twenty-two years ago)

Hey, its my official birthday on Sunday!!!

― Pete (Pete), Thursday, 12 June 2003 12:52 (twenty-two years ago)

Re: Dean, he demanded to be served in the back room rather than go round to the actual bar bit where the queue was, girl explained that there was a queue and she couldn't serve him, he says 'Ah, well you're too fat to serve me anyway', and is subsequently barred after her mates glared at his mates for a bit in that awkward way.

― Ferg (Ferg), Thursday, 12 June 2003 17:54 (twenty-two years ago)

Fed just said "I think I may inadvertently been in a porno film". He is getting desperate.

― ailsa (ailsa), Thursday, 12 June 2003 20:19 (twenty-two years ago)

This is on the highlights of last night (just before he launched into his dirty slag routine, which I thought was quite funny actually)

― ailsa (ailsa), Thursday, 12 June 2003 20:23 (twenty-two years ago)

He is getting desperate.

Explain this to me? He's given up his life to be om BB4 and now he's getting desperate?!

― Lara (Lara), Thursday, 12 June 2003 20:23 (twenty-two years ago)

Getting desperate to stay in...trying to provide "controversial" "entertainment value" I think in an attempt to hang on in there

― ailsa (ailsa), Thursday, 12 June 2003 20:31 (twenty-two years ago)

evict Jon! he's too well hung for my liking.

― Julio Desouza (jdesouza), Thursday, 12 June 2003 20:33 (twenty-two years ago)

Part of the whispering campaign about the size of Federico's penis involved this exchange, according to someone on the DS:BB forum:

steph: "It's like a worm!"

nush: "Perhaps that's why he's so angry at the world!"

sissy: "you'd have to say 'Are you actually fooking me?''"

Silence.

― N. (nickdastoor), Thursday, 12 June 2003 20:46 (twenty-two years ago)

bump. GET RID OF HIM AND LET HIM BE TORN APART BY BAYING WOLVES/DAVINA

― Alan (Alan), Friday, 13 June 2003 07:59 (twenty-two years ago)

Julio, it was Ray who Tania said was well hung. Poor Fed, I bet he's a grower not a shower.

― Emma, Friday, 13 June 2003 08:14 (twenty-two years ago)

I am on the horns of a dilemma now, because Fed and Sissy are equally deserving of being kicked out. I think I'm going to decide that FEDERICO MUST GO because that will at least redress the gender balance. Although... if he stays in there's the tantalising possibility that Ray will at some point pick him up and snap him like a bug-eyed twig.

― Archel (Archel), Friday, 13 June 2003 08:15 (twenty-two years ago)

Nah, him and Ray are OK again now, they were just having a boyish tussle, they punched each other's arms affectionately after the row had died down. I have seen blokes have heated rows then 2 minutes later be best buddies again loads of times. not like girls who plot vengeance while pretending everything is ok. Men are simple souls. well Fed and Ray are at any rate.

― Emma, Friday, 13 June 2003 08:20 (twenty-two years ago)

surely ray was mainly just marking out his "oh girlie viewers i wd never say such stuff ever my respect fr yr gender is unimpeachable and i always pick up the bill ps vote for me later" territory?

― mark s (mark s), Friday, 13 June 2003 08:32 (twenty-two years ago)

Such cynicism in one so old... And I know Ray and Fed made up, but a girl can dream can't she?

― Archel (Archel), Friday, 13 June 2003 09:33 (twenty-two years ago)

OH no no, I would absolutely LOVE the gender divide to continue. Their completely OTT reaction last gtime will surely mean that if Sissy goes this week that Nush's head will explode. HURRAH!

― Sarah (starry), Friday, 13 June 2003 09:35 (twenty-two years ago)

The best bit was when, in response to Ray's warnings that he might be blowing his chances with the female population by coming out with all this stuff, Fed blurted out "I don't care, I'll move to Italy!"

It wasn't clear to me whether this was because the women there won't have seen BB4, or just that Italian women like their men to be men or somesuch.

― N. (nickdastoor), Friday, 13 June 2003 09:46 (twenty-two years ago)

Or men to be mean.

He could go on BB Italy and get shagZor even with his weeny winkle.

― Pete (Pete), Friday, 13 June 2003 10:04 (twenty-two years ago)

''Julio, it was Ray who Tania said was well hung. Poor Fed, I bet he's a grower not a shower.''

oh i only saw the bit where the other girls were trying to get tania to say who it was.

― Julio Desouza (jdesouza), Friday, 13 June 2003 10:09 (twenty-two years ago)

20 seconds after saying 'No I can't tell you' she mouthed 'Ray' to them.

― N. (nickdastoor), Friday, 13 June 2003 10:36 (twenty-two years ago)

Ri:SE poll (which admittedly is voted for by the stupidest people int he world - why pay to vote on a poll about BB when you could spend the same money actually voting) suggests Fed will go tonight, which is a swing from earlier in the week. Did this outburst do Fed in? I think it will be close.

― Pete (Pete), Friday, 13 June 2003 10:47 (twenty-two years ago)

''20 seconds after saying 'No I can't tell you' she mouthed 'Ray' to them.''

N: I was on aim at the time so i wasn't paying as much attn as i should've.

― Julio Desouza (jdesouza), Friday, 13 June 2003 11:16 (twenty-two years ago)

Sometimes I doubt your commitment to reality TV.

― N. (nickdastoor), Friday, 13 June 2003 11:20 (twenty-two years ago)

really?! I'm sorry. forgive me! I will try harder in future.

― Julio Desouza (jdesouza), Friday, 13 June 2003 11:25 (twenty-two years ago)

I think Fed's penis should be called 'little scrounger'.

Little penis jokes ('a worm', 'tiddler', *waves pinky* etc) != funny?

Also, not mentioned above - Fed, after saying 'all women who don't offer to pay is dirty slagXors' added 'and I would also say 'but I'll have sex wiv you if you like'.

Sissy must go because her teeth are too big for her gums are too big for her mouth.

Trania.

― Cozen (Cozen), Friday, 13 June 2003 11:30 (twenty-two years ago)

Sissy must go, us second generation I-Talians have few enough role models in the media as it is. If he goes, it's just Dominic Matteo and Marcello.

― Dom Passantino (Dom Passantino), Friday, 13 June 2003 11:49 (twenty-two years ago)

Why shouldn't Jon go then?

Incidentally, I think he should: he represents a fetishised 'safe' version of 'queerness'.

― Cozen (Cozen), Friday, 13 June 2003 11:54 (twenty-two years ago)

Also, Ri:SE late-in-the-week poll is normally a good indicator (it twigged Anouska & Justine) of who is going to go.

― Cozen (Cozen), Friday, 13 June 2003 11:59 (twenty-two years ago)

Sissy must go because her teeth are too big for her gums are too big for her mouth.

Man, you're out of order & a pervert to boot. How can gums be too small? Would you prefer she had the gums of, say, Ronaldinho? The perfection of Sissy's whole teeth arrangement makes me wanna cry.

― Eyeball Kicks (Eyeball Kicks), Friday, 13 June 2003 13:28 (twenty-two years ago)

Off ya go, you mediocre little gobshite.

― N. (nickdastoor), Friday, 20 June 2003 18:59 (twenty-two years ago)

Thank fuck for that.

Trania HAS to go next week. She is the embodiment of nearly everything I despise in the world.

― j0e (j0e), Friday, 20 June 2003 19:02 (twenty-two years ago)

Tania has grown on me quite a lot. She has manners and tact, which is more than can be said fo some in the house.

― N. (nickdastoor), Friday, 20 June 2003 19:03 (twenty-two years ago)

She's also self-obsessed, vacuous, thick as pigshit and looks like an air hostess on Monarch.

― j0e (j0e), Friday, 20 June 2003 19:04 (twenty-two years ago)

Also she lied and said she'd shagged DANE BOWERS when she hadn't. which is possibly the most desperate act the world has ever seen. I mean - Dane Bowers - for fuck's sake.

― j0e (j0e), Friday, 20 June 2003 19:06 (twenty-two years ago)

I am beginning to develop a serious dislike for Steph. She reminds me of my irritating colleague that I never speak to because every time she opens her mouth I want to punch her. I realise there are two threads for such people, but I have too much anger to vent so I will direct it towards Steph instead.

So who's next? I would much rather either Steph or Trania or Ray went now and we could keep both Cameron and Jon. Can they change the rules now and not have a second eviction tonight?

― ailsa (ailsa), Friday, 20 June 2003 19:07 (twenty-two years ago)

Jon can fuck off, the self-satisfied, boorish fuck up.

― N. (nickdastoor), Friday, 20 June 2003 19:08 (twenty-two years ago)

said she'd shagged DANE BOWERS

Did she claim what Jordan claimed about him too? Same as what they were accusing Fed of?

― ailsa (ailsa), Friday, 20 June 2003 19:10 (twenty-two years ago)

Dunno. But I was really hoping that one of the boys would start a rumour that one of the girls had, in the words of Germaine Greer, "a twat like a horse collar". That would have livened things up a bit.

Another thing I hate about Trania: the way she does four sit-ups and goes on about it like it was an entire workout.

― j0e (j0e), Friday, 20 June 2003 19:14 (twenty-two years ago)

haha see you later Fed!

― Cozen (Cozen), Friday, 20 June 2003 19:21 (twenty-two years ago)

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