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ahh fuck!

― Andrew (enneff), Sunday, 21 September 2003 12:22 (twenty-two years ago)

one month passes...

now?!

― Andrew (enneff), Tuesday, 21 October 2003 12:22 (twenty-two years ago)

fuck, i really fucked that up.

― Andrew (enneff), Tuesday, 21 October 2003 12:22 (twenty-two years ago)

zip zip zip whee! now let's see if it holds up when the midday (USA) slowdown usually takes hold.

― teeny (teeny), Tuesday, 21 October 2003 12:22 (twenty-two years ago)

getting there...

― Alan (Alan), Tuesday, 21 October 2003 12:22 (twenty-two years ago)

Blimey, what's happening!

― Pinkpanther (Pinkpanther), Tuesday, 21 October 2003 12:22 (twenty-two years ago)

How fast, btw? phew!

― Pinkpanther (Pinkpanther), Tuesday, 21 October 2003 12:22 (twenty-two years ago)

we are hurtling into the future at an accelerating rate!! (i hope)

― mark s (mark s), Tuesday, 21 October 2003 12:22 (twenty-two years ago)

tharg to thread!

― mark s (mark s), Tuesday, 21 October 2003 12:23 (twenty-two years ago)

whoosh, there went the publishing deadline

― Alan (Alan), Tuesday, 21 October 2003 12:23 (twenty-two years ago)

Is the date and time right for everyone now?

― Andrew (enneff), Tuesday, 21 October 2003 12:23 (twenty-two years ago)

Well done, this is so much faster!

― Pinkpanther (Pinkpanther), Tuesday, 21 October 2003 12:24 (twenty-two years ago)

Looked good to me from your "now?!" post

― Alan (Alan), Tuesday, 21 October 2003 12:24 (twenty-two years ago)

however, some tinkering with some posts needed to clear the future threads from top of Newanswers, hem hem

― Alan (Alan), Tuesday, 21 October 2003 12:25 (twenty-two years ago)

see then i went back in time to push the deadline forward as well but while i wz there i stepped on an ant! oh NOOOOOOO!!

― mark s (mark s), Tuesday, 21 October 2003 12:25 (twenty-two years ago)

Oh - so this is what they mean by 'glitch' over on ILM... :-)

― Enrique (Enrique), Tuesday, 21 October 2003 12:26 (twenty-two years ago)

Do you call everyone called Andrew a cunt, Kate? Would you do that if Andrew Ridgely was here? Would you?

― Andrew Farrell (afarrell), Tuesday, 21 October 2003 12:27 (twenty-two years ago)

we are now in the future

― Ed (dali), Tuesday, 21 October 2003 12:27 (twenty-two years ago)

Okay, I think it's under control now.

― Andrew (enneff), Tuesday, 21 October 2003 12:27 (twenty-two years ago)

But Andrew Ridgely *IS* a cunt. And Prince Andrew. Do you see the pattern now, DO YOU SEE?!?!?

― kate (kate), Tuesday, 21 October 2003 12:29 (twenty-two years ago)

I recovered your lewd post, kate!

Was that what happened? I was about to go into withdrawl!

(You cunt!)

― Andrew (enneff), Tuesday, 21 October 2003 12:30 (twenty-two years ago)

New answers is still showing wednesday, which it isn't, west of Singapore.

― Ed (dali), Tuesday, 21 October 2003 12:30 (twenty-two years ago)

Andrew WK?

― Pinkpanther (Pinkpanther), Tuesday, 21 October 2003 12:30 (twenty-two years ago)

I miss 9 September. It was warmer.

― Enrique (Enrique), Tuesday, 21 October 2003 12:31 (twenty-two years ago)

ANDREW WK IS ALSO A CUNT!!! THE PATTERN LIVES ON!!!

― kate (kate), Tuesday, 21 October 2003 12:31 (twenty-two years ago)

so the thread that made it to wednesday early will be captured and overtaken by tuesday's at date rollover? (or will they always be trapped 24 hours in the future?)

― mark s (mark s), Tuesday, 21 October 2003 12:31 (twenty-two years ago)

however, things are much faster, let's ee how the go at the UK 4-6/NYC 11-2 time.

― Ed (dali), Tuesday, 21 October 2003 12:32 (twenty-two years ago)

You're breaking up!

― Andrew Farrell (afarrell), Tuesday, 21 October 2003 12:33 (twenty-two years ago)

2 Phuture 4 U

Everyone's wearing rocket-propelled shoes

You'll nevah catch up...

― McFly (Enrique), Tuesday, 21 October 2003 12:35 (twenty-two years ago)

Hang on. Andrew Scott is NOT A CUNT. But that's only because Canadians and Canadians are physically incapable of not being Nice. (OK, they have very poor architectural skills, but that's different from being a cunt.)

― kate (kate), Tuesday, 21 October 2003 12:36 (twenty-two years ago)

Okay, let's stop talking about how various Andrews are cunts, please.

I'm confident that the threads shown as existing tomorrow will sort themselves out shortly. Ie, tomorrow.

― Andrew (enneff), Tuesday, 21 October 2003 12:37 (twenty-two years ago)

Andrew WK is not a cunt, and he's hurt you think so.

― Andrew Farrell (afarrell), Tuesday, 21 October 2003 12:37 (twenty-two years ago)

Or maybe now.

― Andrew (enneff), Tuesday, 21 October 2003 12:38 (twenty-two years ago)

Or not.

Anyway, I'm going to bed. Enjoy.

― Andrew (enneff), Tuesday, 21 October 2003 12:40 (twenty-two years ago)

Why are the newest answered threads at the top?? Or have a missed something?

― Pinkpanther (Pinkpanther), Tuesday, 21 October 2003 12:43 (twenty-two years ago)

these threads are going to stay in wednesday (until we catch up) and all other threads below will only bump up to the top of "Last on Tue" (at least for me)

― Alan (Alan), Tuesday, 21 October 2003 12:45 (twenty-two years ago)

Oh! *confused*

― Pinkpanther (Pinkpanther), Tuesday, 21 October 2003 12:45 (twenty-two years ago)

Finally, ILX works as fast as my brain.

― NA (Nick A.), Tuesday, 21 October 2003 12:46 (twenty-two years ago)

pinkpanther, it's like we have our own virtual moon, gazing benignly down just for a day

a moon called wednesday

― mark s (mark s), Tuesday, 21 October 2003 12:48 (twenty-two years ago)

*just nods as her head is about to explode & cannot take on anymore info at the moment*

― Pinkpanther (Pinkpanther), Tuesday, 21 October 2003 12:49 (twenty-two years ago)

No, Mark S, new moons happen on Monday. Everyone knows this. (Well, Simon LeBon at least.)

― kate (kate), Tuesday, 21 October 2003 12:49 (twenty-two years ago)

Holy shit, I feel like I'm on speed.

― NA (Nick A.), Tuesday, 21 October 2003 12:50 (twenty-two years ago)

I'm not sure I can keep up! *cries*

― Pinkpanther (Pinkpanther), Tuesday, 21 October 2003 12:51 (twenty-two years ago)

(Correct me if I'm wrong, but is anyone else having trouble with Blog View - i.e. it just isn't refreshing? Maybe it's confused by our benign Wednesday moon.)

― kate (kate), Tuesday, 21 October 2003 12:51 (twenty-two years ago)

We are on Midnight out in our EST.
Its like some Cinderalla shit going on.

― Mr Noodles (Mr Noodles), Tuesday, 21 October 2003 12:52 (twenty-two years ago)

Wait so I don't get it, it's not going to refresh new answers until tomorrow?

― Allyzay, Tuesday, 21 October 2003 12:57 (twenty-two years ago)

the blog view and rss feeds aren't working which implies that the newanswerscache table isn't being generated every 2 minutes - which is more than possible with all the time slipping around. this could prove problematic.

― Alan (Alan), Tuesday, 21 October 2003 12:57 (twenty-two years ago)

Wow! Did you put speed holes in the server?

― Dale the Titled (cprek), Tuesday, 21 October 2003 13:04 (twenty-two years ago)

I think it has go-faster stripes. Clearly.

― kate (kate), Tuesday, 21 October 2003 13:05 (twenty-two years ago)

So when is tomorrow in NZ for those in Engerland or The North of America?

― Mr Noodles (Mr Noodles), Tuesday, 21 October 2003 13:05 (twenty-two years ago)

So, it looks like you himmied up her chassis, put new whitewalls on those Flegmeier rims, turbocharged the exhaust, and put all new ratchet cranks on the engine block. Nice.

― NA (Nick A.), Tuesday, 21 October 2003 13:12 (twenty-two years ago)

Wow, we are tricking up ILX, lets get purple fur linned thread pages while we are it.

Where to hang the fuzzy dice?

― Mr Noodles (Mr Noodles), Tuesday, 21 October 2003 13:13 (twenty-two years ago)

Wow, that sounds incredibly filthy, NA.

― Allyzay, Tuesday, 21 October 2003 13:14 (twenty-two years ago)

Hey, be careful how much you do to ILX! I don't wanna be walking through Essex somewhere and see boy races whiz by in a carjacked ILX!

― kate (kate), Tuesday, 21 October 2003 13:16 (twenty-two years ago)

Mmm, speed. :-) Hurrah for Andrew the Server God!

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Tuesday, 21 October 2003 13:18 (twenty-two years ago)

Sorry if I'm pointing out the crushingly obvious, but it appears that the timestamp is wrong and that's what's leading to the New Answers not sorting themselves out properly...for me, every timestamp reads October 21st, 2003 12:00 AM, so of course the computer, sorting everything by time, sorts them the exact same way every time, so the new answers don't float to the top anymore. Or is this the thing that will sort itself out in the future?

― teeny (teeny), Tuesday, 21 October 2003 13:21 (twenty-two years ago)

That also may be the reason it's going so fast, because the computer doesn't have to think about sorting a bunch of posts!

― teeny (teeny), Tuesday, 21 October 2003 13:27 (twenty-two years ago)

new answers are rising to the top of LAST ON TUESDAY

above them float a lunar podule's-worth of six threads only, which were transported into the future (a new post on one of THESE threads pushes it to the top of LAST ON WEDNESDAY)

once tuesday BECOMES wednesday, our moon-of-the-momentary-future will set in a magical shimmering sea of now

― mark s (mark s), Tuesday, 21 October 2003 13:31 (twenty-two years ago)

This thing is too fast - the posts upthread have headed into teeny's future!

― N. (nickdastoor), Tuesday, 21 October 2003 13:32 (twenty-two years ago)

okay thanks mark that makes sense. I hope we sail for the future on a raft of lemons &c. Why is this problem on this board and not ILM?

― teeny (teeny), Tuesday, 21 October 2003 13:33 (twenty-two years ago)

i think these 6 threads are stuck in that order - they aren't bumping up. the order of the threads is the latest date of any post in the thread, so these 6 threads have posts with dates from the future in them which is why they always sort in the same order, and our new posts (correct timed) aren't making any diff to that of course.

― Alan (Alan), Tuesday, 21 October 2003 13:33 (twenty-two years ago)

actually the threads in the podule aren't changing their order are they?

― mark s (mark s), Tuesday, 21 October 2003 13:33 (twenty-two years ago)

correct, they aren't.

― teeny (teeny), Tuesday, 21 October 2003 13:34 (twenty-two years ago)

podule is a great word.

― teeny (teeny), Tuesday, 21 October 2003 13:34 (twenty-two years ago)

*tries to post into the past to avoid x-post but steps on another ant OH NOOO!*

*or is it the SAME ant??*

― mark s (mark s), Tuesday, 21 October 2003 13:35 (twenty-two years ago)

>pinkpanther, it's like we have our own virtual moon, gazing benignly >down just for a day
>a moon called wednesday

'future's so bright that i gotta wear shades' makes sense all of a sudden

― H (Heruy), Tuesday, 21 October 2003 13:42 (twenty-two years ago)

So do you know why Corey wears his sunglasses at night? I've never quite figured that one out.

― Mr Noodles (Mr Noodles), Tuesday, 21 October 2003 13:46 (twenty-two years ago)

This podule's sham popularity is instigating an impression among the denizens here who've been hornswoggled into believing that these threads really are persistently popping to the top of the crop!

The future is now!!

― Tracer Hand (tracerhand), Tuesday, 21 October 2003 13:52 (twenty-two years ago)

Yeah, maybe eventually someone other than me and Pink will post to the Crush of Shame thread, even if it's only by accident...

― kate (kate), Tuesday, 21 October 2003 13:53 (twenty-two years ago)

Accident?

― Pinkpanther (Pinkpanther), Tuesday, 21 October 2003 13:54 (twenty-two years ago)

Oh I gotcha, sorry bit slow this aft!

― Pinkpanther (Pinkpanther), Tuesday, 21 October 2003 13:54 (twenty-two years ago)

For posterity, those threads are:

3000 beers (your social life question)
Spencer Chow FAP NYC 10/23-10/27?
This is the thread where I say (Pt. 4)
Server Upgrade
Crush Of Shame 2: Horny Historians!
Which Viz character are you?

and I think anyone who stumbled into ILX could do much worse as an introductory package to The Way We Live Now.

― Andrew Farrell (afarrell), Tuesday, 21 October 2003 14:12 (twenty-two years ago)

ILX has become incredibly fast! this is great!

― A Nairn (moretap), Tuesday, 21 October 2003 14:21 (twenty-two years ago)

this may have nothing to do w.the upgrade but is there any reason why an old but not THAT old thread shd take 20+ minutes to arrive at the top of nu-answers

thread in question =
Weblog Response: T.M.F.D.

(also asked on SHOUT FOR MODS V)

― mark s (mark s), Tuesday, 21 October 2003 14:58 (twenty-two years ago)

old and very new threads are NOT in a special table called newanswerscache. Only thread with answers in the newanswerscache can be displayed in the newanswers page.

Hopefully the NAcache will start to regularly generate tomorrow.

― Alan (Alan), Tuesday, 21 October 2003 15:07 (twenty-two years ago)

oh ok chz thx bye

― mark s (mark s), Tuesday, 21 October 2003 15:09 (twenty-two years ago)

I'm living in teh future world! YAY!

― jel -- (jel), Tuesday, 21 October 2003 15:27 (twenty-two years ago)

http://ilx.wh3rd.net/archive.php?board=1&date=0

― grraham, Tuesday, 21 October 2003 15:34 (twenty-two years ago)

Thank you, everyone involved! And lookers-on!

My mind is totally blown.

― Sarah MCLUsky (coco), Tuesday, 21 October 2003 15:44 (twenty-two years ago)

Go SpeedILXer...

― luna (luna.c), Tuesday, 21 October 2003 15:50 (twenty-two years ago)

I feel like Marty McFly!

― Nicolars (Nicole), Tuesday, 21 October 2003 15:51 (twenty-two years ago)

Wheeeeeeeeee!!!

― C J (C J), Tuesday, 21 October 2003 15:52 (twenty-two years ago)

I'm so excited that I just can't hide it... I'm so! so! SCARED!

― Sarah McLUsky (coco), Tuesday, 21 October 2003 16:06 (twenty-two years ago)

Go figure, a link from the bottom of the search page.

― Mr Noodles (Mr Noodles), Tuesday, 21 October 2003 16:23 (twenty-two years ago)

This is superspeedy! Hurrah! Thanks to all who made this possible...

― Casuistry (Chris P), Tuesday, 21 October 2003 16:33 (twenty-two years ago)

I just noticed that threads archived in categories all have tomorrow's date:

For example, http://ilx.wh3rd.net/category.php?catid=100

― jaymc (jaymc), Tuesday, 21 October 2003 17:09 (twenty-two years ago)

ROCK!

― adaml (adaml), Tuesday, 21 October 2003 17:15 (twenty-two years ago)

Wow, the server really flies now - awesome. I noticed that all the messages seem to have the same timestamp now: 12:00am. I guess it's only an issue if you have enabled the option to show the time each message was posted.

― o. nate (onate), Tuesday, 21 October 2003 17:56 (twenty-two years ago)

Never mind my last post. I switched the setting off and on, and now the right times are showing up. Thanks again for the great improvements.

― o. nate (onate), Tuesday, 21 October 2003 18:01 (twenty-two years ago)

yeah that worked for me too, thanks o nate!

― teeny (teeny), Tuesday, 21 October 2003 18:10 (twenty-two years ago)

cool, that's sorted it for me, too...

― toby (tsg20), Tuesday, 21 October 2003 19:11 (twenty-two years ago)

Toggling the date off and on fixed that archive problem, too.

― jaymc (jaymc), Tuesday, 21 October 2003 19:21 (twenty-two years ago)

Is anyone else not getting new answers updates?

― adaml (adaml), Tuesday, 21 October 2003 19:36 (twenty-two years ago)

oops, just saw the above. Sorry.

― adaml (adaml), Tuesday, 21 October 2003 19:36 (twenty-two years ago)

...Godspeed ilXoverse. Awsome...

― t\'\'t (t\'\'t), Tuesday, 21 October 2003 19:37 (twenty-two years ago)

"Wait! When will THEN be NOW?"

"...Soon!"

― Kingfish (Kingfish), Tuesday, 21 October 2003 19:43 (twenty-two years ago)

How soon is now?

― Mr Noodles (Mr Noodles), Tuesday, 21 October 2003 19:49 (twenty-two years ago)

look I'm here too.

― Horace Mann (Horace Mann), Tuesday, 21 October 2003 19:54 (twenty-two years ago)

a moon called wednesday sinks gently into the shimmering sea of now RIGHT NOW!!

― mark s (mark s), Tuesday, 21 October 2003 22:08 (twenty-two years ago)

erm except that since i just hit date rollover isn't it like october 22nd now? (ie not October 21st, 2003 12:08 AM all over again?)

― mark s (mark s), Tuesday, 21 October 2003 22:15 (twenty-two years ago)

What, is it getting all Groundhog's Day on you?

― Casuistry (Chris P), Tuesday, 21 October 2003 22:18 (twenty-two years ago)

After a lot of messing around today I've finally installed and configured the new database server. Things seem to be running a lot faster now - let's hope they stay that way.

Again, a huge thanks to all those who contributed so generously. Without you lot it would not have been possible.

― Andrew (enneff), Tuesday, 21 October 2003 22:19 (twenty-two years ago)

Also, apologies for a minor database glitch which would have eaten about 1 minutes worth of new postings. Sorry guys!

― Andrew (enneff), Tuesday, 21 October 2003 22:20 (twenty-two years ago)

there's also been a time shift somewhere along the way - I'm now getting a few threads posted on wednesday??

― Alan (Alan), Tuesday, 21 October 2003 22:21 (twenty-two years ago)

But WOW thanks, it does seem an awful lot quicker right now! hurray

― Alan (Alan), Tuesday, 21 October 2003 22:21 (twenty-two years ago)

Oh, shit.

― Andrew (enneff), Tuesday, 21 October 2003 22:21 (twenty-two years ago)

You invented that glitch to cover for you deleting me calling you a cunt on this thread, didn't you? ;-)

― kate (kate), Tuesday, 21 October 2003 22:22 (twenty-two years ago)

now?

― Andrew (enneff), Tuesday, 21 October 2003 22:23 (twenty-two years ago)

hee, september 9th!!

― Alan (Alan), Tuesday, 21 October 2003 22:23 (twenty-two years ago)

Hahha, no I wish I'd seen that. I'll look it up, just a sec.

― Andrew (enneff), Tuesday, 21 October 2003 22:23 (twenty-two years ago)

Woo, we're in the future now. Can I go home?

― kate (kate), Tuesday, 21 October 2003 22:23 (twenty-two years ago)

This really is MUCH faster. Corr!

― Alan (Alan), Tuesday, 21 October 2003 22:23 (twenty-two years ago)

maybe it's noon

on the moon

― Tracer Hand (tracerhand), Tuesday, 21 October 2003 22:30 (twenty-two years ago)

whoa, it kicked in! whoa!!!

― teeny (teeny), Tuesday, 21 October 2003 22:32 (twenty-two years ago)

I think the New Answers refreshing problem has been fixed now.

― Andrew (enneff), Tuesday, 21 October 2003 22:32 (twenty-two years ago)

wow!

― teeny (teeny), Tuesday, 21 October 2003 22:33 (twenty-two years ago)

yet the podule has retained its integrity in the hail of the now

― Tracer Hand (tracerhand), Tuesday, 21 October 2003 22:40 (twenty-two years ago)

Can anyone give me some feedback as to how this has performed during our typical crunch times?

― Andrew (enneff), Wednesday, 22 October 2003 04:19 (twenty-two years ago)

It held up well for me all day - including during the regular mid-morning crunch.

― luna (luna.c), Wednesday, 22 October 2003 04:26 (twenty-two years ago)

Yeah, ditto, I've had no problems all day.

― jaymc (jaymc), Wednesday, 22 October 2003 04:28 (twenty-two years ago)

It was REALLy slow the past few days. Slower than it's ever been. Now it's as fast as it's ever been. Muchas gracias.

― oops (Oops), Wednesday, 22 October 2003 04:36 (twenty-two years ago)

Yay, that turning date/timestamps off and on in the profile fixed the 12:00 crappo.

For what it's worth, when I update the profile, I get this error message:
Warning: Invalid argument supplied for foreach() in /home/ilx/pubhtml/postuserinfo.php on line 108

The profile's still updated though, so I'm happy, bet the error is just in the loop that sends my updated email-address to all the major spam-merchants.

And I'm sooo happy that this board is fast again! ZOOOOM! Nice workington!

― Øystein V-ROOOM (Øystein H-O), Wednesday, 22 October 2003 10:48 (twenty-two years ago)

I just gotta say one more time, the board performance is truly amazing. Thanks to one and all and especially Andrew!

― teeny (teeny), Wednesday, 22 October 2003 20:04 (twenty-two years ago)

Brava, Andrew! The board has been working great.....

― Nichole Graham (Nichole Graham), Wednesday, 22 October 2003 20:06 (twenty-two years ago)

super consistent and fast--work productivity at all time low--HURRAH!

― Horace Mann (Horace Mann), Wednesday, 22 October 2003 20:07 (twenty-two years ago)

ILX is on trucker speed or something huzzah!

― nickalicious (nickalicious), Wednesday, 22 October 2003 20:08 (twenty-two years ago)

And they said it couldn't be done.

― Sean Carruthers (SeanC), Wednesday, 22 October 2003 20:09 (twenty-two years ago)

Some said it shouldn't be done.

― N. (nickdastoor), Wednesday, 22 October 2003 20:11 (twenty-two years ago)

You guys are scaring me what with that deep movie-trailer-guy voice.

― oops (Oops), Wednesday, 22 October 2003 20:12 (twenty-two years ago)

This winter you'll have to hold onto your pants as ILX gets ready to kick some ass.

― Andrew (enneff), Wednesday, 22 October 2003 22:00 (twenty-two years ago)

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