It's spring 2006 and I say EXCELSIOR to all you rofflers

Pointless Bible Iraq chain email I received today (only 13 of you may read this)

(However, you missed out the word "rolling" for maximum effect.)

I hope the family will get through the hard time and look forward to seeing their parents together again.

-- robin ward (Rbustiegrl7...), March 29th, 2006 5:53 AM. (later)

Well, it must be out on DVD soon.

-- James Mitchell (jxmitchel...), March 29th, 2006 6:03 AM. (James Mitchell) (later)

I couldn't help laughing.

-- Jim M (jmcga...), March 29th, 2006.

look me in the eyes and tell me that yr satisfied

-- Queen Godawful reunion special vomit my ass (wes...), March 29th, 2006.

-- Allyzay Rofflesberger (allyza...) (webmail), March 29th, 2006. (link)

-- Allyzay Rofflesberger (allyza...) (webmail), March 29th, 2006. (link)

-- Allyzay Rofflesberger (allyza...) (webmail), March 29th, 2006. (link)

-- Tracer Hand (tracerhan...) (webmail), March 29th, 2006 4:11 PM. (tracerhand) (later) (link)

I was just washing my hands in the toilet and I noticed my nipples were a bit prominent in my light brown silk blouse. So I tried to push them back in (a finger on each) and left the toilet without realising that I'd left a little water mark on each one.

One of the girls noticed as soon as I came out and nearly sprayed coffee across the room in hysterics.

Bugger.

-- Rumpie (rumpu...), March 29th, 2006 11:43 AM. (lil drummer girl parumpumpumpu)

-- timmy tannin (timmytanni...), March 29th, 2006. (later) (link)

"things"

-- Sterling Clover (s.clove...), March 29th, 2006. (later) (link)

i say we all don capes and masks and go kick some ass!

-- geeta (geet...), March 29th, 2006. (later) (link)

---

We saw The Village by accident. We were flipping channels and were transfixed by the stupidity.

Actually when the slow guy got stabby with it I thought the movie was going to pick up but he only got one person. The subsequent scene where he was then beaten up by a blind girl was the last moment that had any vestige of bossness in the movie; it then turned into "Papa, can I go in the woods?" "No, you're blind and it's forbidden." "Well fuck you, I have MOXIE!" bullshit as opposed to the Colonial House cosplay bullshit that filled the first half of the movie.

I think having the "monsters" be rather obviously people in stupid porcupine costumes undercut the tension of the first half of the movie just a tad.

-- Dan (Sonned By A Blind Girl In A Stabbed Fiance Beef) Perry (djperry@gmail.com), March 29th, 2006. (later)

I also seem to remember a particular gag in something from sometime where a kid tries to use his asthma inhaler in a "sexy" way (i.e., breath-freshener style).

-- nabisco (--...) (webmail), March 29th, 2006. (link)

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I'm glad you clarified what a "sexy" way was.

-- Alba (albab...) (webmail), March 29th, 2006. (link)

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(though I'm not sure how halitosis treatment is sexy)

-- Alba (albab...) (webmail), March 29th, 2006. (link)

-- My Psychic Friends Are Strangely Silent (psychi...) (webmail), March 29th, 2006. (link)

-- Esteban Buttez Goes To College (est...), March 29th, 2006. (later)

neither knows about the other.

but we're all in the same room.

this is occurring while i am typing this.

-- gear (speed.to.roa...), March 29th, 2006 8:14 PM.

---

"I like this song, even though everything about it makes me want to throw up."
That is the single greatest explanation of this song I've ever heard.

-- My name is Kenny (bogususe...), October 1st, 2002.

yep

-- amateurist0 (amateurist...), March 29th, 2006. (later)

yacht rock!!

-- geeta (geet...), March 29th, 2006. (later)

geeta, is this rock??

this vocal is all kinds of atrocious. i think it accounts for whatever strange fascination the single might produce. sort of how if you cut yourself, sometimes it's interesting to look at the wound.

the arrangement reminds me of some of the lesser contemporaneous billy joel singles. the piano parts are just sort of...there. none of the instrumental parts stand out AT ALL. except the sax solo, which only stands out by definition i guess, because it's a solo. but there's nothing remarkable about it.

and, sorry burt, the melody is pretty pedestrian if serviceable. i mean, i can imagine this as a "bacharach tune"--maybe some lp filler on one of his solo lps? i just listened to the song and i can scarcely remember how it goes.

let's talk about the other big late-period bacharach singles. "on my own"...that has that ridiculously bad line, "now we're even talking divorce [long pause] / and we weren't even married!" RIMSHOT. but what's funny is, i like the way michael mcdonald sings the line. patti labelle's vocal is terrible though. i know that's not what i'm supposed to think. but i don't really like patti labelle, and i sort of like michael mcdonald. the little lite-funk guitar figures, well, at least they sort of stand out and have a slight bit of juice to them. I'M TRYING PEOPLE. and i like the way around the 2-minute mark, when the key changes and the melody reenters via mcdonald in a strange mellow vibe. there are some nice moments in bacharach's melody but the song doesn't seem to have been thought through--it's sort of shapeless as a whole. and those lyrics. are those carl bayer sager again?

"that's what friends are for"--fuck that harmonica. fuck it hard. fuck pretty much all of stevie's harmonica parts ever. ok. that's done with. i sort of like the way the melody builds--it's so programmtic and pedestrian, it's perfect for a 7th-grade assembly tune. and dionne warwick makes everything sound good. IT'S TRUE. although it's weird when she sings "fo' sure" instead of "for sure." i like warwick when she enunciates. elton john's vocal part is overwrought and off key. i like the quality of stevie's voice...have mixed feelings about those strangled high notes of his, but he's got a pleasantly distinctive set of vocal trademarks. gladys knight is just gladys knight, a totally expert and mostly uninvolving gospely soul singer. then elton comes back. god, elton, what a fucking hack. i love dionne warwick. the arrangement is, even moreso than "Arthur's theme," just there. except for the harmonica. which i'm liking better the second time around. it breaks the tedium of the seemingly all-electronic arrangement at least. or at least those drum fills may as well be casio.

god what the fuck? this guy wrote ANYONE WHO HAD A HEART for god's sake! how could he write this crap? he wasn't even on crack or anything! i mean, these are better songs than some might allow ("on my own" in particular) but they aren't exactly good.

-- amateurist0 (amateurist...), March 29th, 2006. (later)

I hope that was just a rant. There is this song called "Chaka Khan's I Feel For You" to consider.

-- Allyzay Rofflesberger (allyza...), March 23rd, 2006.

RAPTURE

-- Onimo (gerry.wat...), March 23rd, 2006.

-- TOMBOT (tombo...), March 30th, 2006. (later)

Good to know!

-- Dan (Load Off My Mind) Perry (dan@dan's email address), March 30th, 2006. (later)

-- mookieproof (mookieproo...) (webmail), March 30th, 2006 3:51 PM. (mookieproof) (later) (link)

"Reagan's dead, son. Enjoy the music."

-- Ned Raggett (ne...) (webmail), March 30th, 2006 4:24 PM. (Ned) (later) (link)

-- +++ (...) (webmail), March 30th, 2006 1:12 PM. (later) (link)

-- +++ (...), March 30th, 2006. (later)

meaning?

-- hectorquintero (quiosc...), March 30th, 2006. (later)

i even heard he moved on from ally and is now stalking the girl from babylon 5

-- +++ (...), March 30th, 2006. (later)

-- Tuomas (lixnix...), March 30th, 2006.

Well that's one mystery solved.

-- Dan ("It Glows!") Perry (djperry@dan's email address here), March 30th, 2006.

-- gear (speed.to.roa...), March 30th, 2006.

on yr couch ;)

-- j blount (jamesbloun...), March 30th, 2006.

wearing a hat ;)

-- gear (speed.to.roa...), March 30th, 2006.

-- s1ocki (slytus...) (webmail), March 30th, 2006. (link)

-- Alex in SF (clobberthesauru...) (webmail), March 30th, 2006 9:25 PM. (later)

I haven't seen "Boogie Nights" yet and already it's been ruined forever.

-- Dan (VING RHAMES?????) Perry (djperry@gmail.com) (webmail), March 30th, 2006 9:25 PM. (later)

-- +++ (...), March 30th, 2006 3:10 PM. (later)

Oh, and Nabokov owns this thread.
-- Alfred, Lord Sotosyn (soto.alfre...), March 30th, 2006.

-- J.D. (aubade8...) (webmail), March 30th, 2006. (link)

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But if you do, J.D., don't tell anyone on ILE about your film.

-- Alfred, Lord Sotosyn (soto.alfre...) (webmail), March 30th, 2006. (link)

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do tell us if there's titties in it tho

-- Shakey Mo Collier (audiobo...) (webmail), March 30th, 2006. (link)

-- elmo, holy helper (elmo.oxyge...), March 30th, 2006 9:42 PM. (allocryptic) (later)

day 1

-- Pay Attention (dude@), March 30th, 2006 9:42 PM. (later)

-- I hope there is breakcore in heaven buddy (adelangsto...), March 29th, 2006.

i read this as 'secret chefs'

-- +++ (...), March 30th, 2006 3:11 PM. (later)

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Well, "The Protocols of the Elders of Zion" was orginially a cookbook, you know.

-- elmo, holy helper (elmo.oxyge...), March 30th, 2006 3:15 PM. (allocryptic) (later)

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TO SERVE MATZOH

-- +++ (...), March 30th, 2006 3:16 PM. (later)

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For instance, I met this guy at a party the other day. We're both movie buffs but he owns a independent movie store. We have the same taste in music but he's in the local 'scene' and what not. We have the same kinds of personality quirks but he uses them to become socially active whereas my slight eccentricities have made me alienated from the outside world. He has become successful is his artistic achievements while I can not pay someone to take notice of my work. No to metion, he also extremely good looking and a bit of a ladies man while I'm not goog looking (I'm not saying I'm ugly per se) and as far away from doing well with women as possible without being gay.

While talking to him I thought to myself, As long as he's around, I could fall off the face of the Earth and no one could care. I asked him, "what's your secret?" "To what?" "To all this!" "What do you mean 'all this'?" THE BASTARD DOESN'T EVEN KNOW HIS LUCK! The worse thing of all this that he's a naturaly cool dude. In fact I think he's awesome. I liked him far more than I know anyone else would enjoy my company. I left the party feeling small and empty. With people like that, why should I exist?

I'm not really looking for answers to that question. I just want to know if I'm the only one above the age of 18 out there who has felt that way. (Gosh, hopefully not!)

-- Lurker McLurkerstein (2Sh...), March 31st, 2006 2:26 PM. (later)

Answers

I bet if he started a thread it would be much better than this one.

-- estela (estelaisale...), March 31st, 2006 2:30 PM. (estela) (later)

-- Delivering over 43,973,865,717,760 bytes per day | What are you sending? (...), March 31st, 2006 4:00 AM. (fandango) (later)

I hope that's a link to a lost verse of the Tom Petty song.

-- Paul in Santa Cruz (pauls...), March 31st, 2006 4:10 AM. (Paul in Santa Cruz) (later)

nah, the soup dragons.

-- grimly fiendish (simonmai...), March 31st, 2006 4:16 AM. (grimlord) (later)

-- STOP! Time Thief! (masonicboo...), March 31st, 2006. (kate)

-- Wrinklepaws (wrinklepaw...), March 30th, 2006.

Which is exactly what has made up the bulk of my wardrobe forever, with no nod to fashion, but now everyone will think I'm some terrible trend-following Gap lover.

What's to be done?

-- Hello Sunshine (fiver_the_bunn...), Today 6:53 AM. (Hello Sunshine) (1 trackback) (later)

Answers

Immigrate?

-- Dadaismus Is A Very Magic Fellow (dadaismu...), Today 6:55 AM. (Dada) (later)

:(

-- nabisco (--...), March 31st, 2006. (later)

http://we-exalt.m-matos.blogspot.com

:)

-- Pashmina (vietgrov...), March 31st, 2006. (later)

http://we-are-curiously-indifferent-to.m-matos.blogspot.com

:|

-- nabisco (--...), March 31st, 2006. (later)

-- Dom Passantino (juror...) (webmail), March 31st, 2006. (link)

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Dom yr hyphenation is a thing of wonder

-- Thomas Tallis (tallis4...) (webmail), March 31st, 2006. (link)

and now..

yup, g-dawg, g-man, g-child, g-kiosk, i get all these

-- charltonlido (...), April 1st, 2006 1:30 AM. (gareth) (later)

g-kiosk being the best.

-- lauren (warmleatherett...), April 1st, 2006 1:32 AM. (laurenp) (later)

-- Wrinklepaws (wrinklepaw...), April 1st, 2006. (Wrinklepaws) (later)

-- electric sound of jim (and why not) (electricsound@...), April 2nd, 2006 6:13 AM. (later)

-- s1ocki (slytus...) (webmail), April 2nd, 2006. (link)

-- Hello Sunshine (fiver_the_bunn...), April 3rd, 2006. (Hello Sunshine) (later)

i got a message a few weeks ago from this dude simply with the text "I want you" in the body of the message.

I responded with "O RLY?"

then I got the above message in response.

-- POOP BITCH (mandeewrigh...), April 3rd, 2006 9:44 AM. (Mandee) (later)

-- chap who would dare to be a stone cold thug (joe.goode...), April 2nd, 2006.

Comic Shop Guy is good authority?

If it's true, that makes 6000 on-schedule pages an even more amazing feat.

-- pixel farmer (crump...), April 2nd, 2006.

That's weird, I totally meant to write 'very dubious authority'. I suspect it's bullshit.

-- chap who would dare to be a stone cold thug (joe.goode...), April 2nd, 2006.

David Banner - Play
D4L - Big Shit Poppin'
M.I.A. - $10
Pharell feat. Jay-Z - Frontin'
Julez Santana - Freaky, There It Go (whistle song)
Khia - My Neck, My Back
Lil' Kim - Big Momma Thing
Missy - Pass the Dutch, Wake Up
Busta - Light Your Ass On Fire

It used to be ironic for me, but damn, those pop songs will get into your head.

-- Jason W Fellows (jasonfellow...), April 3rd, 2006.

I agree, that is hilarious.

-- Alex in Baltimore (shipley.a...), April 3rd, 2006.

LOL... SONGS

-- s1ocki (slytus...), April 3rd, 2006.

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okay
-- kingfish ubermensch dishwasher sundae (jdsalmo...), April 3rd, 2006. (kingfish 2.0) (link)

No, you need to pronounce with the right elan.

what thread is it from???

Anyway:

---

I could see a lot of meltdowns happening if people were able to find out one way or another that they were being ignored.

-- My Psychic Friends Are Strangely Silent (psychi...), April 3rd, 2006. (later)

I'm 100% in favor of those kinds of meltdowns.

-- pixel farmer (crump...), April 3rd, 2006. (later)

Yeah, why am I arguing against this? It will bring the funny.

-- My Psychic Friends Are Strangely Silent (psychi...), April 3rd, 2006. (later)

-- estela (estelaisale...) (webmail), April 3rd, 2006 8:21 PM. (estela) (later) (link)

-- strongo hulkington is a guy with a belly button piercing (wt...), April 4th, 2006 11:14 AM. (dubplatestyle) (later)

-- ++++ (...), April 3rd, 2006.

http://images.amazon.com/images/P/B0007L43DC.01.LZZZZZZZ.jpg

-- strongo hulkington is a guy with a belly button piercing (wt...)

Whoa, WTF?

I call bullshit on that ten times over.

a) You're the kind of guy that, if that really did happen, would have rushed straight to ILX to start a "HAI GUYZ!!!" thread without even pausing to pull your pants up.
b) Explain "You didn't get laid" because of it. Whilst flinging your trousers off in the midst of passion your ID fell out of your wallet and hit her in the face? Whilst she lowered herself down onto you you happened to mention "By the way, I totally snarked on a popular indie band the other week, so I think I may just be able to maintain erection for over 45 seconds this time"? Or, you know, have you confused "Guaranteed sex" with "Woman speaking to you for long enough to know your surname?" Did this one knee you in the balls as well or...?
c) The idea of anything you write being read by women is quite improbable.

-- Dom Passantino (juror8@g

WTF when did you turn into Calum?

in an excelsior thread??

In order to comply w/A/D "touchstones", it shd have read "I appreciate all the concern, now I want hen fap, also plz rofl @ my wikipedia vandalism" & then been cut & pasted into new threads 10,000 times.

what about a bosshogg/aotp/celph interview

you would have got all weird and paranoid and defensive if you had?

-- Real Goths Don't Wear Black (miltonpinsk...), April 4th, 2006. (later)

no. i didn't find it interesting.

nice comeback!

1. If she watches while you get you ass beat instead of helping you fight....THAT BITCH IS NOT YOUR FRIEND!
2. If she think it's aight to go with your exboyfriend because you didn't really like him that much.... THAT BITCH IS NOT YOUR FRIEND!
3. If she hangs around people that you don't like or that do not like you..... THAT BITCH IS NOT YOUR FRIEND!
4. If she trys to talk to the guy you crushin(go wit....got you pregnant, who you f***) on... You already know THAT BITCH IS NOT YOUR FRIEND!
5. If she hooks up with a guy that you use to hook up with, no matter how drunk she is...... THAT BITCH IS NOT YOUR FRIEND!
6. If your birthday comes around and she doesn't even send you a text .....THAT BITCH IS NOT YOUR FRIEND!
7. If your man is caught cheating and she won't roll with you to fuck up his car..... THAT BITCH IS NOT YOUR FRIEND!
8. If she's a hoe! Hoes can't be trusted and THAT HOEISH BITCH IS NOT YOUR FRIEND!
9. If she knows your man is cheating and doesn't tell you..... THAT BITCH IS NOT YOUR FRIEND!
10. If she won't let you borrow $5 without collateral...... THAT BITCH IS NOT YOUR FRIEND!

SEND THIS TO THAT BITCH THAT IS YO FRIEND CAUSE SHE AINT NEVER DID NONE OF THIS SHIT!!!!!!! ~FUCK THEM OTHER BITCHES CAUSE I'M DOWN FOR MY BITCHES~

a girl? well... i can dress up, if it helps?

Aja/D could have been, but you spurned them, so we have no option other than to pile on you.

fuck this, i'm going home.

hasselhoffKITT.jpg

SOOOOO open to formal criticism.

The central character, Nobby, is a middle-aged man who suffers from chronic hemorrhoids. Some people have defended Viz from its critics by pointing out that it is far more sophisticated and subtle in its satire on society and current affairs than one might think; but Nobby's Piles is very much a strip that is unapologetically the sort of silly schoolboy humour that earned Viz the controversy it has attracted in its quarter-of-a-century existence.

Each week, Nobby undergoes repeated abuse to his bottom by a series of terrible accidents that only serve to agonize his poor, hemorrhoid-afflicted anus. He has been impaled on a church spire after a parachute jump, had his hemorrhoids stabbed by the rock pick of a mountain climber, fallen into a skip full of broken glass (bottom first of course), and slid down the rusty metal bannister of a flight of steps after an ill-advised skateboard trick went wrong. Much of the pleasure of the strip comes from the anticipation created by the increasingly contrived ways in which these incidents are set up: a typical example might see Nobby's wife trying to apply some hemorrhoid ointment to her husband whilst in a darkened caravan, and show her trying to distinguish between two otherwise identical bottles, one labelled 'Pile Ointment', the other 'Devil's Brand Hell-Fire Jalapeño Sauce - Bang! Bang! Molto Explosivo!' - with a predictable lack of success. Similar to a Tom and Jerry cartoon, Nobby's agonies often cause him to shoot high into the air whilst screaming hideously.

The cartoon provides endless slang words for hemorrhoids, such as bum-grapes or ceramics (rhyming slang; ceramic tiles = piles). The name of the strip is a play on Nobby Stiles - another rhyming slang expression for piles.

Waht was the name of King Arthur's sword?

a) Excrement
b) Excalibur
c) Excelsior

-- strongo hulkington is a guy with a belly button piercing (wt...), April 4th, 2006. (dubplatestyle) (later)

-- Muldoon the game-keeper dude (I miss Bob Peck) (stevem78@gANGSTAmail.com), April 4th, 2006.

Best line of the movie.

-- teeny (teeny@...), April 2nd, 2006 6:44 AM. (teeny) (tracklink) (later)

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Don't lock my threads please.
-- Andrew (nf@...), April 2nd, 2006 10:40 PM. (enneff) (later)

-- Pashmina (vietgrov...)

-- ++++ (...), April 4th, 2006. (later)

He's counting in base 3?

-- Dan (Wild Guess) Perry (djperry@AARGH_DAN'S REAL EMAIL ADDRESS SHOWS UP IN AN EXCELSIOR THREAD AGAIN!!!.com), April 4th, 2006. (later)

Interestingly, it might be we have the vandal's real name, see the deleted history of Special:Undelete/Image:Hallitus-Tuomas.jpg (linked from User:TuomasTumour). Google did not find anything useful about him and I don't know why a Helsinki Business College student would (or could) use an IP belonging to University of Glaskow, Scotland. Do you have a list of other IPs this "hen fap" guy has used by chance? Tracking vandals from my own country is a specialty of mine (I can understand the Finnish language clues etc.) so feel free to send any evidence to my way if he still pesters you. Cheers, jni 19:37, 9 March 2006 (UTC)

Mr. Hen Fap struck again as TuomasTumour and has been permabanned, however soon after he did it again here under the IP number 86.31.56.59. So far that's all I've seen of him since the last outbreak. Back on March 9 he also used 86.31.63.214. Cheers. 23skidoo 04:19, 26 March 2006 (UTC)

but in my dream, i care for it
-- strongo hulkington is a guy with a belly button piercing (wt...), April 4th, 2006.

come on dom, let's have it!

-- Ned Raggett (ne...), March 29th, 2006.

Well, I'm glad I made him laugh before the March ceasefire ended. Haikeeba!

ElectroSoul in the same vein as Jamie Liddell, Hot Chip, etc.

has this been discussed? sorry, but i'm not going to read through all the posts to find it. And I don't get around to listening to shit for a while, so, if it's been done, either redirect me or tell me it's been done. Snide internet comments are for sharters.

-- Tynan DeLong (mhalberstra...), December 14th, 2005.

Sharters?

-- elmo argonaut (elmo.oxyge...), April 4th, 2006 12:23 PM. (admin) (userip)

I say the time has come for decision
Better steer my boat for a reason
Lost on the way I went over horizon
She went out of sight
The girl lost me a lifetime

Sometimes I feel ??? baby
Sometimes I feel ??? baby

I say the time has come for decision
Better steer my boat for a reason
Lost on the way I went over horizon
She went out of sight
The girl lost me a lifetime

Sometimes I feel ??? baby
Sometimes I feel ??? baby

I think I cracked my skull on the way down
I think I lost my head when I lay down
The fear of facts presented in the cold light of day

And when I step back from all this I see that I'm fighting
I can't help myself, there's no reason for lying
Truth and fiction they all become one [would never have got the "Truth and fiction" bit without spiltext_Mob]
Help me from the sea to the beach to the laaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa

Sometimes I feel ??? baby

i won you fucker I WON!!!!

-- Ichigo (dr_...), April 4th, 2006. (ex machina) (later)

-- James Mitchell (jxmitchel...), April 4th, 2006. (James Mitchell)

-- Dan (Brokeback Messageboard) Perry

haha

-- estela (estelaisale...), April 5th, 2006.

-- i.m. pei (wheresj...) (webmail), April 5th, 2006. (link)

maybe i should take up some kind of outdoor pursuit instead, like tennis

-- charltonlido (...), Today 9:31 PM. (gareth) (later)

-- the man from mars won't eat up bars where the tv's on (theundergroundhom...), April 5th, 2006. (Jody Beth Rosen)

-- cutty (holle...), April 5th, 2006.

You're not the only one to get them confused, however. A couple of years ago some researchers did a lot of MDMA research on Rats, only for someone to point out - after all their expensive research had been finalised - that they had been giving them Methamphetamine.

-- Chewshabadoo (ilx@chew.nildram(R£M0V£).co.uk), April 5th, 2006 5:26 AM. (Chewshabadoo) (later)

I'll bet the cages were tidy, that should have tipped them off.

-- andy -- (and...), April 5th, 2006 5:33 AM. (later)

-- Bidfurd (Bidfurd8...), April 6th, 2006. (Bidfurd)

-- DV (dirtyvica...), April 6th, 2006 11:07 AM. (dirtyvicar) (later)

The goat-like aroma becomes almost unbearable.

-- Treacle in a Flaming Wheelbarrow (masonicboo...), April 6th, 2006 11:10 AM. (kate) (later)

http://profile.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=user.viewprofile&friendid=16076835

or maybe "no banana suit, no credibility"

-- Real Goths Don't Wear Black (miltonpinsk...), April 6th, 2006. (Enrique) (later)

I mean.

O. M. G.

O!! M!! G!!

http://img336.imageshack.us/img336/1315/214018540l2ar.jpg

Roxy:

http://ilx.p3r.net/searchresults.php?board=2&mode=messages&q=&titlepart=&name=tynan&email=&username=&dateafter=&datebefore=&catid=all

x-post to mr. dropout

cos if it's true alot of people are gonna be leaving ILM
NOT FAIR
-- oh, wrinklepaws! (wrinklepaws...), April 6th, 2006 9:00 AM. (Wrinklepaws)

How old are you again, 17?

mickey, you douschetard, you fucking ruined YSIs and ILM for the rest of us with your newspaper grandstanding.

i'm so outta here.
-- oh, wrinklepaws! (wrinklepaws...), April 6th, 2006 3:03 PM. (Wrinklepaws)

-- Susan Douglas (SusanisDougla...), April 6th, 2006 8:06 PM. (Susan Douglas) (later) (link)

the last message to be posted in that thread before it's locked is

is slsk available for mac yet
-- Renard (drenard...) (webmail), April 6th, 2006. (Renard)

sigh.

-- ESTEBAN BUTTEZ~!!! (estebanbutte...), April 6th, 2006. (ESTEBAN BUTTEZ~!!!) (later)

As for other genres of indie (indie rock and pop), mainly they just have good lyrics.

I don't know. In my opinion the main difference between emo kids and indie kids is that indie kids are okay with life and want to live it as happily as possible, and emo kids (or at least the current emo stereotype) just wants people to feel sorry for them...or more accurately hott emo girls.

Indie kids are usually smarter and a tad more original then emo kids.

For example, an emo kid's idea of original: dying a strip of hair a color that they've never seen anyone else do before.
Where as an indie kid is more like, "Screw the heat. I'm wearing my brown tux today."
Yeah, indie kids are kind of girly about fasion...but who cares?

So, in closing, indie music is a thousand times better then emo music ever was, and (to a true musician, or just a true music fanatic) indie sounds nothing like emo.

-- Mr. Sword-for-a-head (lumber_jacqu...), April 3rd, 2006.

oh, you wanted famous people's sto...

-- andrew m. (westernis...), April 7th, 2006 12:42 AM. (andrewmorgan) (later) (admin) (userip)

esp the first response by judas (was that Ken?)

I genuinely hope not. I keep kind of thinking it's funny.

-- Tiki Theater Xymposium (fiestasandsiestas(nospam)@yahoo.com), April 7th, 2006 1:53 PM. (Bent Over at the Arclight) (later)

Answers

I'm Rick James, bitch!

-- ESTEBAN BUTTEZ~!!! (estebanbutte...), April 7th, 2006 1:57 PM. (ESTEBAN BUTTEZ~!!!) (later)

Where's the beef?

-- AaronHz (aaronh...), April 7th, 2006 1:58 PM. (AaronHz) (later)

no wai

-- electric sound of jim (and why not) (electricsound@hotmail.com), April 7th, 2006 2:00 PM. (electricsound) (later)

-- the man from mars won't eat up bars where the tv's on (theundergroundhom...) (webmail), April 6th, 2006 2:54 PM. (later)

she did look cool tho

-- Konal Doddz (stevem7...) (webmail), April 6th, 2006 2:55 PM. (later)

---

jesus fucking christ people stop with the exegesis!!!

-- amateurist0 (amateurist...), April 7th, 2006. (later)

-- phil-two (philtw...), April 5th, 2006.

oh oof. i already regret that.

-- phil-two (philtw...), April 5th, 2006.

Gosh.

-- JimD (jim@elephant.nildram.co.uk

-- loggedout (logge...), Today 11:43 AM. (tracklink) (later)

-- s1ocki (slytus...), April 7th, 2006.

Please Use the Undelete Function on ILM Thread 6875941 and strip Jess of his mod access

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

That's the worst Lorrie Moore story I've ever read.
-- nabisco (--...), April 7th, 2006.

-- jaymc (...), April 7th, 2006.

Yes.

[...]

-- Casuistry (...), April 7th, 2006.

Well, for one thing, he was tall.

-- jaymc (...), April 7th, 2006.

dude i used to work with: hey bro!
gear: hey
dude i used to work with: hows it goin champ??
gear: not bad!
dude i used to work with: so hey just checkin in, im lookin for work these days, seein if you know of anything, buddy
gear: i worked with you in '01, right?
dude i used to work with: yeah been a long time!
dude i used to work with: :)
gear: oh shit, tornado!
dude i used to work with: in L.A.?
*gear has signed off*

-- gear (speed.to.roa...), April 7th, 2006.

-- +++++ (...), April 8th, 2006 12:35 AM. (later)

once i listened to an art bell caller claim he was levitating his kitchen table while on the phone with art

-- +++++ (...), April 8th, 2006 12:36 AM. (later)

What's so weird about shapeshifting? I thought everyone did it.

-- My Psychic Friends Are Strangely Silent (psychi...), April 8th, 2006 12:37 AM. (Ex Leon) (later)

nicolepatrinmorph.gif

-- ++++++ (...), April 8th, 2006 12:43 AM. (later)

Oh no you didn't.

-- My Psychic Friends Are Strangely Silent (psychi...), April 8th, 2006 1:07 AM. (Ex Leon) (later)

Thom Yorke is a musical genius who treats music as an art form. Radiohead are more talented, more intelligent, more political, more introspective and deserve to be called artists. Chris Martin is not an artist. He's a corporate tool who writes repetitive, bland, shallow and emo lyrics and sounds like he's being emasculated when he sings. How can you say he's genuine when he writes lyrics like "for you i bleed myself dry?" i mean come on people. Coldplay are no better than Simple Plan. Chris Martin may say all the right things- "war is bad"; get the fuck up and do something about it! Radiohead do. But this man is a total airhead and he's completely controlled by other people. Coldplay readily admit that they model themselves after Radiohead and steal their ideas. Without Radiohead there would be no Coldplay; just listen to The Bends and OK Computer. Chris Martin publicly admires Thom Yorke and Yorke has said he thinks Martin sucks and wants nothing to do with his band. Surprised?

Don't get me wrong, everyone should listen to whatever music they want and create whatever music they want but we're talking about who the better artist is, not who has the more clever marketing techniques or who was born with the prettier face. There's no room for argument here. No one is comparing Limp Bizkit to The Beatles, right?

I wrote about this at length on my blog if you want to read it:
http://utopiandrive.blogspot.com/2006/04/radiohead-vs-coldplay.html

-- utopiandrive (sahilkapu...), April 8th, 2006. (later)

here's another one

What the fuck, how can Insane Clown Posse knock off Gwar? They are tottaly different in both appearences, style of music and number of group members. Don't get me wrong, but i have never been to a GWAR concert where they came out with juggalo paint on thier faces. But i do see you're point with Slipknot. and to keep people from wondering, change that "cow-worker" thing, unless you were talking with someone who works with cows.

-- Bash (bashbashin...) (webmail), April 7th, 2006. (later)

-- Ronan (ronan.fitzgerald6NOSPA...), April 8th, 2006 7:52 PM. (Ronan) (later)

A: You wouldn't let one near a lightbulb in the first place because they would stick it up their bottom and use it to stimulate their g spot because they are all evil untrustworthy sex perverts.

-- chap who would dare to be a stone cold thug (joe.goode...), April 8th, 2006 7:56 PM. (chap) (later)

he said atheists, not priests!

-- scott seward (skotro...), April 8th, 2006 7:59 PM. (scott seward) (later)

Get back to your mass produced britney spears shit.
Marillion is a band who has been goin for more then 20 years.
A band with a very devoted fanbase.
A band very high regarded by a lot and i do mean a lot of professional musicians.
A band that manages to survive all this time because of there fans.
A band that now manages and produces themselves. (thankgod)
A band that will survive any kind of bullshit review by money hungry so called journalists who propably have a mass produced bullshit cd collection at home who wont know good music unless emi or some other moneyhungry music company is behind it.
These guys are brilliant.
Afraid of sunlight is brilliant, brave is even more brilliant,
And marbles is brilliant.
Take the time to listen to it (loud with all lights off)
take the time to really read the lyrics.
And be enlightened.
Do yourselves a favour.

-- Jasper Kan (jasperka...), April 9th, 2006 3:09 PM. (link)

-- Beth Parker (marthasminion...), April 9th, 2006.

-- Tantrum The Cat (tantrumtheca...), April 9th, 2006.

-- Trayce is not a guy! (spamspanke...), April 6th, 2006 4:47 PM. (trayce) (later)

But yeah the darkness is kinda depressing, innit.

-- Trayce is not a guy! (spamspanke...), April 6th, 2006 4:48 PM. (trayce) (later)

must be all the lycra

-- gem (gemilyinterrupte...), April 6th, 2006 4:50 PM. (trisk) (later)

-- latebloomer: someone's been drinking my youth! (posercore24...), April 10th, 2006.

LOCK THREAD

-- the man from mars won't eat up bars where the tv's on (theundergroundhom...), April 10th, 2006.

I did spaghetto-os earlier!

-- nickn (nickn62...), April 10th, 2006.

DON'T LOCK THREAD

-- the man from mars won't eat up bars where the tv's on (theundergroundhom...), April 10th, 2006.

Given that the older, larger homes on Esplanade and in the Garden District routinely fetch prices in excess of 2 million dollars – this is not exactly a few crackpots quibbling about $20 – 30 K. It is people who through their own labor – or likely quite a few through well planned births – who are looking at several hundred thousand dollars eroding from a major asset.

Also, they are people who were there for this same storm. So you feel their losses – many of them looking at wealth diminished by millions as businesses and other investments were washed into the Gulf – should now have to deal with more loss? When is it enough that you would consider them victims, too?

There are always at least two sides to every story.

-- Lovelace (futilecrime...), April 10th, 2006. (later)

But it's temporary.

-- Thermo Thinwall (tupac.chopr...), April 10th, 2006. (later)

Temporary FEMA trailer parks are never temporary. Ask the folks in Florida in which there are entire cities created in the middle of nowhere with refugees from hurricanes that happened years ago. Between their own financial problems and FEMA mismanagement, these people have either been unwilling or unable to leave. Thus, I would assume that most of the parks created after Katrina will last as long as possible.

-- Lovelace (futilecrime...), April 10th, 2006. (later)

finally, someone brave enough to stand up for the wealthy

-- +++++++ (...), April 10th, 2006. (later)

-- LeCoq (leiffe...), April 10th, 2006 10:58 AM. (later)

-- jinx hijinks (nutramentmik...), April 10th, 2006.

e Moustache
des

and she was pimping for the other guy.

-- phil d. (pldenniso...), April 10th, 2006 10:06 AM.

-- Deric W. Haircare (troninmorocc...) (webmail), April 10th, 2006. (Deric W. Haircare) (later) (link)

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

ORLY

-- Fight the Real Enemy -- Tasti D-Lite (dr_...), April 10th, 2006. (later)

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Operation_Fastlink

-- Fight the Real Enemy -- Tasti D-Lite (dr_...), April 10th, 2006. (later)

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Apocalypse_Production_Crew

-- Fight the Real Enemy -- Tasti D-Lite (dr_...), April 10th, 2006. (later)

YA RLY. That's the point of the article, to describe what has happened to me. Your point? And I'm well aware of the Operation Fastlink article also. I edited it to fix a lot of wrong information in there myself.

-- Mickey (mi...), April 10th, 2006. (later)

I'm not really posting for your benefit, felon with belly button ring!

-- Fight the Real Enemy -- Tasti D-Lite (dr_...), April 10th, 2006. (later)

Poverty & lower class status are a choice. She was born with oily skin.
-- Dave AKA Dave, April 10th, 2006 1:49 PM.

-- Dan ( ;_; ) Perry (djperry@gmail.com), April 10th, 2006. (later)

http://www.seaquistperfect.com/Press%20Releases/TAG/TAG-body-spray.jpg

Heavens! In Case You Didn't Feel Like Showing Up! Live!

-- James Mitchell (jxmitchel...), April 10th, 2006. (James Mitchell) (later)

-- geeta (geet...), Today 8:27 PM. (geeta) (later)

Vision... Creation... NISSAN

-- morris pavilion (yndlqls0...), Today 8:42 PM. (samjeff) (later)

Indeed, one more death in the wheel of meat that is existence, what of it?

Of course Euro was gay and deserve to die. Also he jilt Varg, in whom he had relationship, it was lovers argument that went horribly wrong. As spurned lover was Varg. They argue over cover art, so I am to hear from true sources. Euro desire to depict pig vomiting blood, Varg think this is too trendy.

-- Jann Karlsson (dominakto...) (webmail), January 7th, 2005.

Boredoms Tour and a 6 CD Box Set!!!!! YAY!!!!

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

"PBS talk-show host and producer Charlie Rose was recovering Thursday from heart surgery in Paris."

-- curmudgeon (curmudgeo...), April 11th, 2006 10:59 AM. (DC Steve) (later) (link)

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

how romantic!
-- s1ocki (slytus...), April 11th, 2006 1:17 PM. (slutsky) (later) (link)

I agree that p2p's basically er, um, wrong, but I still do it several times a week, sometimes more than once in a day. Same with masturbation.

-- Mike Dixn (sbsweat...), April 11th, 2006 6:22 PM. (Mike Dixon) (later) (link)

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

WTF masturbation isn't wrong.
-- Alex in SF (clobberthesauru...), April 11th, 2006 6:22 PM. (Alex in SF) (later) (link)

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

It is the way I do it.

-- Mike Dixn (sbsweat...), April 11th, 2006 6:23 PM. (Mike Dixon) (later) (link)

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Do you make pirate noises or something?
-- Alex in SF (clobberthesauru...), April 11th, 2006 6:25 PM. (Alex in SF) (later) (link)

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

I pay a RIAA lawyer to come over and do it for me.
-- Mike Dixn (sbsweat...), April 11th, 2006 6:29 PM. (Mike Dixon) (later) (link)

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Masturbate? Or make pirate noises?

-- Alex in SF (clobberthesauru...), April 11th, 2006 6:30 PM. (Alex in SF) (later) (link)

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

I pay him to unzip my YSI's.
-- Mike Dixn (sbsweat...), April 11th, 2006 6:31 PM. (Mike Dixon) (later) (link)

-- gear (speed.to.roa...), April 12th, 2006.

-- Mikey G (...), April 12th, 2006 12:40 PM. (later)

-- lauren (warmleatherett...), April 11th, 2006.

and shattered hats i assume!

-- s1ocki (slytus...), April 11th, 2006.

This concept needs not one but two threads of its own.

-- Cunga (visionsofjohann...), April 10th, 2006.

nick sylvester = maker upper

Dave Matthews Band : Name Your Reasons Why They Are So Bad & Hated.

-- j blount (jamesbloun...), April 10th, 2006.

-- Homosexual II (mandeewrigh...) (webmail), September 15th, 2005. (link)

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

I shouldn't have read this before bed. Nightmares await.

-- Ally C (allycook9...) (webmail), September 15th, 2005. (link)

-- Dan (Assholes) Perry (djperr...), April 12th, 2006. (later)

"Most of what passes for tolerance today is not tolerance at all, but rather intellectual cowardice. Those who hide behind the myth of neutrality are often afraid of intelligent engagement. Unwilling to be challenged by alternate points of view, they don't engage contrary opinions or even consider them. It's easier to hurl an insult--'you intolerant bigot'--than to confront the idea and either refute it or be changed by it. 'Tolerance' has become intolerance."
http://www.str.org/site/News2?page=NewsArticle&id=5359

"It used to be in our country you could think what you wanted and say what you wanted. If you wanted to be a bigot or a racist that was your own business. You couldn't perform acts of bigotry but it was your privilege to think and talk any way you wanted."
http://www.str.org/site/News2?page=NewsArticle&id=5131

-- A Nairn (moreta...) (webmail), April 12th, 2006 2:14 PM. (moretap) (later) (link)

oh, wrinklepaws

-- mookieproof (mookieproo...) (webmail), April 12th, 2006 2:17 PM. (mookieproof) (later) (link)

Though that Amanda story comes close.

-- Allyzay Rofflesbot (allyza...) (webmail), April 12th, 2006. (link)

-- Eisbär (llamasfu...), April 12th, 2006. (later)

What else are you supposed to do with food served to you at a restuarant?

-- Dan (Put Your Ass In It?) Perry (djpe...), April 12th, 2006. (later)

OK I was going to reply to that but now I can't stop laughing at the idea of the group of us all taking turns sitting in the plate.

-- Allyzay Rofflesbot (allyza...), April 12th, 2006. (later)

-- Dan (TACO TIME!) Perry (djperry@gmail.com), April 12th, 2006.

at least it wasn't white castle

-- phil-two (philtw...), April 12th, 2006.

NEVER MIND MY WHOLE POINT IS THOSE THINGS TOGETHER STILL COST LESS THAN STUPID $5K HAMBURGER WHICH PROBABLY TASTES LIKE A FANCY DONKEY'S ASS WHAT WITH ALL THAT NONSENSE ON IT ANYWAY

-- Allyzay Rofflesbot (allyza...), April 12th, 2006.

BREAD
3 LOBSTERS
BREAD

-- Jarlr'mai (jimmy.parke...), April 13th, 2006 2:43 AM. (jarlrmai) (later)

Real Surreal was up there too.

-- paulhw (pppso...), April 13th, 2006. (later)

that sounds like a pretty weak decade for you, bro.

-- enrique's pseudonym (...), April 13th, 2006. (later)

dom pizzatino's scarf to thread

-- name (...), April 12th, 2006

that was nearly post #1 til i realised i had no desire to see his face

-- electric sound of jim (and why not) (electricsound@hotmail.com), April 12th, 2006

-- schwantz (david_isbiste...) (webmail), April 12th, 2006 7:42 PM. (later)

Schwantz, wasn't aware I was trolling, what does that mean? Is that what X-post is used for?

-- Min Liang (minlian...) (webmail), April 13th, 2006 12:44 AM. (later)

all xposts are trolls

(xpost)

-- Onimo (gerry.wat...) (webmail), April 13th, 2006 1:55 AM. (later)

NOT ENOUGH WAR

NOT ENOUGH FAMINE

NOT ENOUGH SUFFERING

NOT ENOUGH NATURAL SELECTION

-- Eurozay Rofflesbot (allyza...) (webmail), April 13th, 2006. (link)

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

KMFDM IS THAT YOU??????

-- Fight the Real Enemy -- Tasti D-Lite (dr_...) (webmail), April 13th, 2006. (link)

john is a member of the mountain goats.

-- a.b. (aaaaaathatsfivea...), April 10th, 2006.

what is it?
-- s1ocki (slytus...), April 14th, 2006. (later)

-- molly (babegurly62...) (webmail), August 16th, 2004 5:51 PM. (link)

"Thurrrr's been a murrrduuurrr...wee lad in mascara, he's been harmed!"

-- Father Esteban Buttez (...), April 14th, 2006.

perhaps they were indignant about not getting a present that year
-- Ronan (ronan.fitzgerald6NOSPA...), Today 7:25 PM.

They probably started a thread on here bitching about it.
-- Mingus Realty (noodle_vagu...), Today 7:30 PM.

I hate the world.
-- Alba (albab...), Today 7:31 PM. (later

-- Je4nn3 ƒur¥ (j...), September 29th, 2005 11:30 PM. (Je4nne Fury)

In the current Bl3nd3r, there's a picture of [Natalie Portman] in a Jim Morrison pose

What, onstage with her cock out?

-- Dadaismus (dadaismu...), September 29th, 2005 11:31 PM. (Dada)

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

How did TC taste after all these years?
-- Konal Doddz (stevem7...), April 13th, 2006.

Standing directly in front of you?
-- Dom Passantino (juror...), April 15th, 2006

courtesy Brian

-- Dec (collegerocker9...), April 16th, 2006 9:58 AM. (later)

oh shit
-- Dan (BUSTED) Perry, April 15th, 2006 3:49 PM. (Dan Perry) (later) (link)

-- Casuistry (chri...), December 12th, 2005.

-- s1ocki (slytus...), April 16th, 2006. (later)

And never really excelled at anything else.

-- Gilbert O'Sullivan (fluxion2...), April 16th, 2006. (later)

uh gi jane?

-- s1ocki (slytus...), April 16th, 2006. (later)

of course. how could I forget that one.

-- Gilbert O'Sullivan (fluxion2...), April 16th, 2006. (later)

Fucking off is one.

-- Dan (Just Saying) Perry (djperry@gmail.com), April 17th, 2006.

No, I could never disappoint my fans.

-- Rabbi Esteban Buttez (estebanbutte...), April 17th, 2006.

http://www.christinairene.com/evan2/no%20crowd.JPG
-- gear (speed.to.roa...), April 17th, 2006.

Hull, obv :-)

But he likes yanking everyones chains, and here it seems like chains are easily yanked, so I dunno. *shrug*.

-- Trayce (spamspanke...), April 17th, 2006.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

if esteban is an "ordinary guy" i get a terrible impression of the whole of australia.
-- Sterling Clover (s.clove...), April 17th, 2006.

-- latebloomer's jazz oddysey brought to you by kellog's corn flakes (posercore24...) (webmail), April 17th, 2006. (link)

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

what do you think the lazy should be let to do?

-- RJG (RJ...) (webmail), April 17th, 2006. (link)

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

be lazy.

-- latebloomer's jazz oddysey brought to you by kellog's corn flakes (posercore24...) (webmail), April 17th, 2006. (link)

-- phil-two (philtw...) (webmail), April 17th, 2006. (link)

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

i feel like i just set myself up for something.

-- phil-two (philtw...) (webmail), April 17th, 2006. (link)

lollers

-- A representative of the Aja / Dante diaspora (denperr...), April 17th, 2006. (later)

wouldn't that have been the noise dudes, you schtick-copping choad?

-- Fight the Real Enemy -- Tasti D-Lite (dr_...), April 17th, 2006. (ex machina) (later)

Unread Messages

the fact is this is ILX and RACISM has to be brought into every thread of any worth

-- A representative of the Aja / Dante diaspora (gedge4ev...), April 17th, 2006. (later)

TRU

-- Fight the Real Enemy -- Tasti D-Lite (dr_...), April 17th, 2006. (ex machina) (later)

-- s1ocki (slytus...), April 17th, 2006. (later)

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

chocoholic
-- j blount (jamesbloun...), Today. (later)

-- latebloomer's jazz oddysey brought to you by kellog's corn flakes (posercore24...), April 17th, 2006.

-- Bestaban Huttez (lo...), April 17th, 2006. (later)

EVERYONE ELSE: "Oh, Wrinklepaws!"

-- phil d. (pldenniso...), April 18th, 2006 6:20 AM. (Phil D.) (later)

---

Hahahahaa. Oh wow.

DONUT VS. DROOPY USA! ONE MORNING ONLY! IN A B&B IN CHRISTCHURCH NEAR YOU!

I come down for the hour of free breakfast between 8 and 9am, table service and everything. Very American couple is sitting around the table from me. Very American Husband, who I will call Droopy from here on out, notices my often-worn Easy Street Records Seattle hoodie. (I overhear their previous conversation enough, words like "Scottsdale" and "Mesa" to induce they live in Phoenix, AZ btw.. I could be wrong though, not that this matters anyway.)

Droopy notices my hoodie. He bellows out, "So I see you live in Stalinist Seattle! HAW HAW HAW HAW HAW!"

I was just dumbfounded with this guy's idiocy. I think the rest of the room was too. Maybe it was the decent french roast coffee I was spoiling myself to (as I've vowed to never drink coffee except on special occasions. This B&B, the Croydon House, is posh but deserves props for living up to its coziness. Highly recommended, especially after 10 days in hostels.), but I retorted in a fake Russian accent back in a somewhat loud manner "HAHA YES I CAN NOT WAIT TO FLY BACK ON STALINIST BOEING AIRPLANE TO GO BACK TO WORK FOR STALINIST MIKROSOFT, WHERE I CAN GO AND GET MY COFFEE FROM THE STALINIST STARBUKKS, ACQUIRE MY CASH FROM STALINIST WASHINGTON MUTUAL, AND ALSO ACQUIRE STALINIST MUSIK ONLINE FROM STALINIST AMAZON DOT KOM! HAW HAW HAW HAW HAW HAW HAW!"

Droopy pauses and slams his coffee on his table, with his wife IMMEDIATELY trying to calm him down. Thankfully, this all ended right at 8:30am, where the cuckoo clock in the room made a noise that made everyone's heads turn, just enough of a distraction for Droopy's wife to just tell him to give up and pat him on his back a bit more.

A french couple across from me are giggling after all of this. Very American couple leave for upstairs. A family, who I overhear are from Utah take their table. Family wonders why everyone is giggling, especially the father. Waitresses gives me a good natured ribbing about being from "STALINIST SEATTLE" and laughs. "Stalinist Seattle???" says the father of the Utah family. "That's the most ridiculous thing I've ever heard." and laughs.

I go up to my room, and Droopy is using the computer terminal as I pass. Droopy apologizes to me. I don't exactly apologize but make sure "it's all good dude; no biggie :D" and I explain I was in a silly mood, and was a bit tired this morning..(the latter of which is a polite lie as I got a GREAT night's sleep, actually, and felt very awake and great. Foot's feeling MUCH better now, in fact.)

-- DOQQUN (do...), April 17th, 2006. (later)

-- kerin heatley (meenomeeno0...), April 18th, 2006 2:06 PM. (link) (admin) (userip)

yes it was "Smalltown Boy" by Bronski Beat

-- Ronan (ronan.fitzgerald6NOSPA...), April 18th, 2006 2:09 PM.

-- Spaceman Joe (joeconnor...) (webmail), April 16th, 2006 12:47 AM. (later) (link)

please tell me this is new troll

-- Dan (New Album By Fred Durst) Perry (djperry@...) (webmail), April 18th, 2006. (link)

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

poonis

-- sean gramophone (sea...) (webmail), April 18th, 2006. (link)

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Owen, you can't buy PR like this.

-- Edward III (ehonaue...) (webmail), April 18th, 2006. (link)

Awesome. What IS it with the figures of food speech? I mean, duh, I understand the appeal, but you know, fruit (for instance) is kind of sexy. Conceivably. Comparing my ass to steak on a plate is less...immediately comprehensible. Also cf "I could eat you up like hot food." Haha WHAT?!

-- Laurel (sininspac...), April 18th, 2006.

Ha, maybe we should start a "Memorable things strangers have yelled at you in your skeevy neighborhood thread."

-- Laura H. (elemenopa...), April 18th, 2006.

Also cf "I could eat you up like hot food." Haha WHAT?!

= "Very carefully."

-- Tuomas (lixnix...), April 18th, 2006.

Jo(e?) picked up and the only thing I could think to say was "Do you play the tuba?" The answer was yes! All I could think to say was, "Well, did you know your phone number is 524-TUBA?" The conversation ended there. I just had no out because all my ridiculous questions were answered in the affirmative.

-- Abbott (igotabeefpastr...), April 18th, 2006 1:40 PM. (Abbott) (later)

-- --++-+- (+...), April 19th, 2006 4:56 PM. (later) (link)

"I remember once, before I was a christian, I was asleep, and woke up, but was kinda half asleep, or something, and I kept telling Satan that he was a b$@$ and f#$# him and stuff, then I kept feeling the bed shake like someone was puching me into the bed hard, the first time I thought it was funny, so I said it again, and it happend again, but I must have not liked it the second time because I didn't do it anymore, do you think this was a demon attack?"

BigChrisfilm, Christian Forums [Comments (22)]

-- Allyzay Rofflesbot (allyza...), April 19th, 2006.

-- -+-+--- (+...), April 19th, 2006. (later) (link)

I am now seeking a writer to pitch for this feature article:

3,000 - 5000 words ...Dubstep the Postmodern Music of 2006.

Conditions:

Must be familiar with Dubstep music, i.e Dubstep forum, downloads all the latest dubstep mixes etc

Needs to know Cultural Studies Theory

Deadline for copy: April 30th

reference on postmodern music:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Postmodern_music

-- DJ Martian (altmartinu...), April 19th, 2006.

-- M. Biondi (firingsolution...), April 19th, 2006. (later)

I’ve maybe told this story around here before but I don’t remember and I don’t really care. The last time I shit myself other than a little fart/diarrhoea leakage was when I was 14. I was walking home from the public library in my town (about 8 blocks away from my house) one sunny summer day after a day of reading Nabokov (I read almost all of his books in that summer) and felt those familiar cramps at about the halfway point. I first quickened my pace, then sensing that this was acting almost like a pump slowed it and clenched. This was also a mistake. Once I was about 3 blocks away I knew I wasn’t going to make it so I released a little – just enough so I wouldn’t completely explode in my pants. This worked. Within feet of my yard I knew the main shit onslaught was coming but I’d reached the Promised Land, or so I thought. I made it up the front steps and said to my brother through the screen “holy fuck do I need to shit!” Like a ninja he leapt up and locked the door – the door to which I had no key. As I struggled with the handle my bowels evacuated themselves in seconds with me still standing outside. I looked up at the window and my brother was gone. Actually, no, he had just fallen on the floor from the laugh spasms he was having. I started screaming at him and he finally opened the door for me and ran off out the back door fearing for his life. I managed to struggle up the stairs to the bathroom, got undressed in the shower and cleaned myself up. I beat the crap out of my brother but I’m sure for him seeing the look on my face at the moment the shit came out was worth it.

-- Bryan (twp62y...) (webmail), December 14th, 2003. (link)

Touche'D talk about a girl I was once close to and how shes acting shady on me now "So When are you gonna come and see me HU? when youve filled you girlfriend quota? Travled all over the world but Minnesota? Dont matter if I say pop or soda... Dont matter if you say Hella or really cuz years from now Im still gonna be me. Only differance is you might not see me cuz when you cant have me sure wanna be with me... no wanna be seen with me? better look in the mirror before you turn Touche'D ... Touche' Lady , take a hit flip the script and become slim shady.. dont matter if your dating a B**ch or a ladie cuz when you wanna ask me out im gonna say maybe"

Sone of the topics I talk about on my upcoming CD White Lesbian Rapper will be Lesbian topics such as: Hurt by ex gfs, a song about Jeeps (popular gay automobile), lesbian trends such as Jocks and abercrombie and Fitch jeans, with girls in pony tails, being broke, kinky cop sex, complation of naming of old school song titles talking about all the songs that remind you of one person from back in the day.

You may email me at Crookedluvr2... for more info

-- Alicia Leafgreen (Crookedluvr2...)

-- Dave Stelfox (destelfo...), July 14th, 2003. (Dave Stelfox)

1. Remove pants
2. Waggle genitalia
3. Repeat as neccessary

-- John Justen (johnjuste...), April 19th, 2006 11:03 PM.

That's how I DEMOLISH SPORTS STADIUMS.

-- nabisco (--...), April 19th, 2006 11:05 PM.

apparently i used to be joe dolce

-- mark s (mar...), April 20th, 2006 9:03 AM. (mark s) (later)

That was your best period.

-- Michael Jones (tourajsig...), April 20th, 2006 9:05 AM. (MichaelJ) (later)

Joe Dolce single handedly brought down apartheid and gave the aboroginees their voice back in Australia. What have _you_ done Mark?

-- Dom Passantino (juror...), April 20th, 2006 9:16 AM. (Dom Passantino) (later)

i have seen attack ships in flame off the shoulder of orion

-- mark s (mar...), April 20th, 2006 9:19 AM. (mark s) (later)

-- Drew Daniel (mces...), April 20th, 2006 5:16 AM. (Drew Daniel) (later)

funniest shit ever

nice to see Dr. Fink is still finding work

-- s1ocki (slytus...), April 15th, 2006

-- Tuomas (lixnix...), April 20th, 2006. (later) (link)

-- noel's biggest fan! (martinfrank...), April 20th, 2006. (later)

-- noel's biggest fan! (martinfrank...), April 20th, 2006.

Regs trolling > regs making normal posts.

but i've tried it!
-- phil-two (philtw...), April 21st, 2006 3:10 PM. (phil-two) (later)

http://video.google.com/videoplay?docid=6640225987281635407&q=punch&pl=true

-- Horace Mann (handsomishbo...), October 7th, 2003.

ts: crab lice vs. frostbite
-- Horace Mann (handsomishbo...), October 7th, 2003.

(from: cheap nice hotels in montreal? )

On the one hand, I still think it's Dom. On the other hand, I feel like I've arrived. On the third hand, I've killed less people than Noel Edmonds.

-- s1ocki (slytus...), April 21st, 2006.

"Hi" is such an interesting word. In addition to its conventional usage, I used it in this sarcastic mode: "He told me that I needed a library card before I could check out books. It's like, hi, I wasn't born yesterday."

Also sometimes as a way of interrupting an awkward silence -- of which I can think of two scenarios. 1) Staring at the face of a new girlfriend right after we've kissed, I just say "Hi." As in, "So here we are, and this is nice, right?" 2) I've just made a fool of myself somehow, like I've spilled coffee all over my shirt, and people are waiting for me to react, and I just say "Hi." I guess that's just short for "Hi, I'm an idiot," which may be related to the sarcastic mode above.

-- jaymc (jmcunnin...), April 21st, 2006 3:20 AM. (jaymc) (later)

what if youve just made out with a bicurious guy

-- -++-+-++ (+-...), April 21st, 2006 3:23 AM. (later)

-- a.b. (aaaaaa...),
April 6th, 2006.

A crown is not a hat.

-- Henrietta Leavitt and the Cepheid Variables (masonicboo...), April 21st, 2006.

why the fuck not

-- anthony easton (anthonyeasto...), April 21st, 2006.

I want her to go on being queen FOREVER!!! I mean, even as her body breaks down, they should replace it with cybernetic parts, until we have a ROBOT QUEEN.

-- Henrietta Leavitt and the Cepheid Variables (masonicboo...), April 21st, 2006 8:43 PM. (kate) (later)

robotic 12-ft-lizard queen

-- mark s (mar...), April 21st, 2006 8:52 PM. (mark s) (later)

With a nice senible hat perched on top

-- TS: Mick Ralphs vs. Ariel Bender (dadaismu...), April 21st, 2006 8:53 PM. (Dada) (later)

-- Mr Happy (frenzie...), April 22nd, 2006.

Answers

this can only end in tears

-- gear (speed.to.roa...), April 22nd, 2006.

if tears rhymes with bears then OTM

-- zappi (cfca...), April 22nd, 2006. (joni) (later)

-- Onimo (gerry.wat...), December 31st, 2004 12:46 AM. (GerryNemo) (link)